Baby Activity Tracker - Happy and Blessed Home

Transcription

Baby Ready
Preparing for & Adapting to Life with Baby
Monica Pruett
HappyandBlessedHome.com
Baby Ready: Preparing for and Adapting to Life with Baby
Copyright © 2014 by Monica Pruett. All rights reserved.
You are welcome to use short excerpts of this book for review or critique purposes. For more
information and other queries, contact Monica Pruett at HappyandBlessedHome.com via her
Contact Me page.
No part of this document or the related files may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by
any means (electronic, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written
permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews, excerpts
and images made available for promotional uses, and certain other noncommercial uses
permitted by copyright law. The contents of this document and the related files may not be
sold or redistributed in any manner.
The website addresses recommended throughout this book are offered as a resource to you.
These websites are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement on the part of the
author, editors, or reviewers of this book, nor does the author vouch for their content. Some of
the links provided herein are affiliate links. You can show your support of the author by using
these links. The author receives a small commission whenever these links are used.
This book does offer advice in baby care. However, the author, editors, reviewers, and
publisher disclaim all responsibility arising from any adverse effects or results that occur or
might occur as a result of the inappropriate application of any of the information contained in
this book.
Readers of this text are ultimately responsible for their own health and children and may or
may not use any advice contained herein at their own risk. If you have a question or concern
about the appropriateness or application of the treatments described in this book, please
consult your healthcare professional.
Electronic Edition, 1st Edition.
Independent publishing services and cover design by Melinda Martin of TheHelpyHelper.com.
This book is dedicated to
my sister, Tina,
and
to my beautiful mommy friends.
Table of Contents
Section 1: Preparing for Baby ........................................................................................................ 1
Congratulations ........................................................................................................................... 2
My Personal Experience – A Preemie at 30 Weeks ................................................................ 3
Slow Down .................................................................................................................................. 5
Ways to Slow Down ................................................................................................................ 5
Selecting a Doctor ....................................................................................................................... 7
Questions to Consider when Selecting a Doctor .................................................................... 7
Birthing Considerations........................................................................................................... 8
Selecting a Hospital ................................................................................................................... 10
Questions to Consider when Selecting a Hospital ................................................................ 10
Assemble a Birth Team ............................................................................................................. 12
Why You Should Have a Birth Team ..................................................................................... 12
Questions to Ask a Potential Midwife or Doula.................................................................... 15
Selecting the Right Baby Gear................................................................................................... 16
Sleeping Gear ........................................................................................................................ 18
Feeding Gear ......................................................................................................................... 22
Changing/Bath Gear .............................................................................................................. 27
General Gear ......................................................................................................................... 30
Entertainment for Baby ........................................................................................................ 35
Clothes .................................................................................................................................. 37
Ways to Save ......................................................................................................................... 37
Free Baby Gear .......................................................................................................................... 39
Baby Registry Checklist ............................................................................................................. 46
Setting Up the Nursery ............................................................................................................. 52
Safety & Ease of Use ............................................................................................................. 52
Prepare with Frozen Meals ....................................................................................................... 55
Helpful Hints to Prepare for “Power Cooking” ..................................................................... 55
Helpful Hints for Shopping .................................................................................................... 56
Helpful Hints for “Power Cooking” Day ................................................................................ 56
Power Cooking Recipes ......................................................................................................... 57
Additional Resources for Make-Ahead Meals and Meal Planning ....................................... 63
Packing for the Hospital ............................................................................................................ 64
Carry in the Car ..................................................................................................................... 64
Pack in Bags ........................................................................................................................... 64
Pack in bags (optional) .......................................................................................................... 65
Pack for BABY ........................................................................................................................ 65
Creating a Birth Plan ................................................................................................................. 66
Sample Birth Plan Template.................................................................................................. 66
Childcare Arrangements ........................................................................................................... 69
Selecting a Pediatrician ............................................................................................................. 74
Questions to Consider When Selecting a Pediatrician ......................................................... 74
Technology Aides ...................................................................................................................... 76
New Technologies for Tracking Pregnancy ........................................................................... 76
Baby Name Planner................................................................................................................... 79
Using Technology for Baby Name Planning .......................................................................... 79
Section 2: After Baby is Born ....................................................................................................... 80
Ask for What You Need ............................................................................................................. 81
Round Up the Troops ................................................................................................................ 83
Transition Helpers ................................................................................................................. 83
Lower Your Expectations .......................................................................................................... 86
Other Unrealistic Expectations You May Have ..................................................................... 86
Find Rest and Refreshment....................................................................................................... 88
Child Care After Baby is Born .................................................................................................... 90
Starter Questions in Selecting Day Care or Other Child Care ............................................... 90
Baby Activity Tracker ............................................................................................................ 91
Read to Help You Transition ..................................................................................................... 94
Communicate in Your Marriage ................................................................................................ 95
Sleep when Baby Sleeps............................................................................................................ 97
Tips to Sleep when Baby Sleeps ............................................................................................ 97
Breastfeeding Tips .................................................................................................................... 98
Bottle-Feeding Tips ................................................................................................................. 100
A Few Bottle-feeding Tips ................................................................................................... 100
Get Baby to Sleep .................................................................................................................... 101
Tips to Get Baby to Sleep .................................................................................................... 101
Get Organized ......................................................................................................................... 102
Things to Do Within the First Few Days of Leaving the Hospital ........................................ 102
Breathe in the Moment .......................................................................................................... 103
Other Ways to Connect and Make the Most of the Time with Your Little Ones ............... 103
Let Others Pamper You ........................................................................................................... 105
Ways Others Can Help ........................................................................................................ 105
Finding Joy in the Transition ................................................................................................... 106
The Symptoms of Postpartum Depression ......................................................................... 107
Our Story ................................................................................................................................. 109
About the Author .................................................................................................................... 115
Section 1:
Preparing for Baby
Congratulations
First off, congratulations on your pregnancy! There is nothing as miraculous as the birth of a
newborn baby. Pregnancy and becoming a parent is an awesome journey. There is no other
experience like it.
If you are a first time mom, you may be worried about getting your figure back or how you’ll juggle life with a new little one. I can relate to those concerns, and I believe that if you follow
the tips I’ve written here that you’ll have help with those concerns and more.
If this is not your first pregnancy and you are looking for tips on how to make the transition
smoother this time around, this book is also for you.
I was worried about my health during pregnancy, how I would juggle life with a baby, and a
whole bunch of other things. I was afraid that I would not know what to do with a baby, and I
was actually very terrified of labor and delivery.
After having been through two epidural-free deliveries and two adorable boy babies, I can
honestly say that you have nothing to fear. With a little research and preparation, you can
actually make the transition into mommy-hood a worry-free, joy-filled experience.
Nothing is as awesome as holding that little newborn baby in your arms. You finally get to
meet the newest member of your family, to see their sweet little face, touch their tiny hands,
and cradle a bundle of joy. A baby is a loving, living, and breathing miracle.
You might worry about what kind of parent you’ll be or how you’ll be able to teach this child. The nice thing about a baby is that you always know more than the baby knows, and you do not
have to know everything at the beginning. You will learn everything you need to know by taking
one step at a time; believe it or not, it will come as you need it.
Everyone’s experience is different. In fact, the same woman can have a completely different experience from one pregnancy to the next. Children are so different that parenting is often a
different experience for the parent from one child to another.
The key to getting through any pregnancy, at least for me, is to plan and prepare for the birth of
your baby, and, when you feel overwhelmed, just remember this: you already have everything
that you need to care for your baby, because the one thing that baby wants more than
anything is you.
Yes, you, Mommy, are the answer to baby’s every need. No special rocker, crib, or stuffed toy
will ever replace you. Just being baby’s Mommy means that you have everything you need. For many, pregnancy is a season of discomfort. Your body goes from having to be the lifesupport system for one person to being the life support system for two or more human beings.
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Copyright © 2014 by Monica Pruett of HappyAndBlessedHome.com. All rights reserved.
It’s no small task to carry a pregnancy. Some books I’ve read say it’s similar to climbing a 14,000 ft. mountain. If you’ve ever tried hiking at high altitudes, which I have, you know that the experience, although exhilarating and rewarding, is taxing on your body. Pregnancy is taxing,
but your body was made for this, and you have nothing to fear, as long as you pursue good
pre-natal care, stay healthy, and are supervised by a physician.
There are many excellent books that can walk you through the developmental stages of your
baby, as well as the physical changes and aches and pains of pregnancy. I highly recommend
“What to Expect When You are Expecting” and “Your Pregnancy, Week by Week.” This book is not an attempt to reinvent those books, nor is this book something to seek out if you are
looking for medical advice.
This book was written for three reasons:
1. To offer advice that I have not seen elsewhere on how to mentally and practically prepare
for and adjust to life with baby,
2. To provide you with tips, tools, links and checklists to aide in planning, and
3. To help you get organized before and after baby’s birth.
My Personal Experience – A Preemie at 30 Weeks
My experience has blessed me with two precious baby boys. However, I was completely caught
off-guard by how different those two experiences were.
My firstborn came as a total surprise when he decided to make his arrival after only 30 weeks
of gestation. Honestly, I don’t think any amount of planning can prepare you for mothering a preemie. There are very few books that explain what mothering a preemie is like, and I’m not so sure those books were written by a mom who had been through the actual experience; the
books make it out to be such a “medical” experience vs. a “hands on” 24/7 of what the experience is really like.
However, if you are blessed with a preemie, I highly recommend “The Preemie Parent’s Companion Guide.” This book was a lifesaver for my husband and me. The book empowered us
to ask better questions, as well as seek more direct contact with our son. Seeing your baby with
all the tubes and wires can be pretty intimidating – especially to a first-time parent. Keep in
mind, though, that no one will care for your baby as much or as well as you will. Preemie or
healthy newborn, you are baby’s #1 advocate. Having a preemie may catch you off-guard, but advances in medicine and excellent neonatal
intensive care have blessed us with a child that is no different from a child born at 40 weeks.
Today, our son looks and behaves just like any other preschooler his age.
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The intensity of round-the-clock hospital visits, coupled with the constant worry that I
experienced with a preemie infant, meant my indoctrination into mommyhood was intense and
very draining. In fact, I think there is rarely a mom who isn’t overwhelmed by her first year of mommyhood. Having a baby leads to many changes in your life.
But with our second son I’ve learned to do a few things differently that I wished I had done more of with our first. The things I’ve done with our second son have made adapting to life
with baby so much more manageable. I learned so much in the period of time between the
birth of my first son and my second son that I wanted to share with readers the things they can
do that will help make the transition of bringing home a new baby much easier.
This book is broken into two sections. The first section is advice and wisdom on preparing
before baby. Even if you have already had your baby, you may want to review this section for
any new ideas.
The second section is for adapting to life after baby’s arrival. It includes things to help you
adjust and even thrive after baby arrives.
I’ve also included questions to assist you in doing things like selecting a doctor or pediatrician
and checklists for getting organized. Checklists are contained within the pages of this book.
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Slow Down
One of the things that I struggled with in my first pregnancy was that I operated at the same
level of commitment and intensity that I had before I was pregnant. Despite the morning (allday) sickness, fatigue, and nausea, I was determined to continue to juggle all the things that I
had been doing before I became pregnant.
There is no way to know for sure, but this may have contributed to my son’s early birth at 30 weeks. Stress affects the human body, and it certainly can affect a pregnant body and the baby
inside.
With my second pregnancy, I did a much better job of letting go.
When you are pregnant, your body is working overtime to nurture and grow another human
being. Your body is undergoing some huge changes, and you need to recognize that right now is
a very important time to spend some energy and focus on taking care of yourself. Take some
time and slow down.
Ways to Slow Down
Start asking for help now. While you are pregnant, don’t be afraid to ask for help. I asked my husband for help with everything from assisting in caring for my eldest son to doing housework.
My husband took on the task of bathing our first son, reading him a bedtime story, and putting
him down for the night. This actually worked great for the both of them since they got to spend
more quality time together. He also took on the task of vacuuming and keeping our floors
clean. It was a huge relief for me. If you are a working pregnant mommy, talk with your
supervisor about ways to offload some of your responsibilities (if you work in an environment
that is supportive of pregnant moms.)
Delegate. There are probably people in your life that you trust to whom you can delegate some
tasks, and they would gladly help you out. This could be as simple as going through the mail to
asking another mom-friend to help you register for baby items. In addition, delegating to others
can be a fun way to make them a part of baby’s anticipated arrival. Let go. Ask yourself if there is anything in your current way of life that you will likely not be able
to continue after baby’s birth. If there are things that you are doing now that you will likely not be able to continue once baby arrives, find a way to start letting go of that activity. Graciously
step down from extra activities and responsibilities that rob you of the rest you need as an
expectant mom. Before I had our first son, I used to hold a group meeting for women in my
home once per week. When I became pregnant, I asked my co-leader to host our group in her
home to help alleviate some of workload. She willingly started to host our group study from her
home.
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Rest. Build margin into your life so you can get more rest. Try to take naps after work or on
weekends so your body can get additional rest.
Put your feet up. Pregnant ankles tend to get “fluffy”. Reduce the strain by putting your feet up as often as possible.
Adopt healthier habits. If there are unhealthy habits from your life before pregnancy, you may
want to start replacing those unhealthy habits with healthier habits. I’ve never found it easy to completely stop doing something, but I usually can replace a bad habit with a better habit. For
instance, if you like to stay up late, try going to bed an hour earlier. If you eat junk food, try to
replace it with healthier foods like fruits. You’ll feel better and so will your unborn baby. And drink more water. Your body needs that extra fluid.
I think what’s most important is to not take on the whole world and feel like everything must
get done before baby arrives. The most important thing is that you focusing on having a
healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby. Everything else is secondary.
Anything additional, like reorganizing your closet, cleaning out the garage, taking on a new
project at work, renovating your bathroom, etc, should wait until after baby. Don’t put undue stress on your body.
The goal of having a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby starts with you. When you take
better care of yourself, you are well on your way to taking better care of the most important
person to baby--you. When you’re in better shape, you can do something better than anyone else can, and that is take care of baby, before and after baby arrives. The two things go
together: take care of you and take care of baby.
Other parties who can play a helpful role in a healthy baby and healthy pregnancy are your
doctor, your spouse, your birth team, and your pediatrician.
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Selecting a Doctor
Before baby is born, one of the most important things you can do is select an Obstetrician (OB).
If you’re going the natural route, selecting a doula or midwife will be just as important as selecting a doctor and is covered in an upcoming chapter. With our firstborn, my husband and I
actually changed doctors midstream simply because we felt our existing physician did not have
the bedside manner we wanted. Your OB is different than your pediatrician. We will cover
selecting a pediatrician in a later chapter.
We found the OB we really wanted by word-of mouth. I highly advise expectant mothers to ask
around. Once you’ve identified some potential candidates, you can use this checklist to help
you down-select to the doctor (OB) you most want to work with.
Questions to Consider when Selecting a Doctor
~What experience does your OB and his/her colleges have in delivering babies?
~What % are c-section and what % are vaginal births?
~Are there any patients that you could contact for a referral?
~What is your doctor’s surgical experience?
~Does your OB listen to your pregnancy cares and concerns?
~Do they offer exceptional care and a comforting bedside manner?
~Do they treat you with respect and offer to support your desired pregnancy delivery method?
~Do they provide medical services at your preferred hospital?
~What are their co-pays and how is insurance handled?
~What are your OB’s hours and in the event that your doctor is unavailable, who would deliver the baby? Are you comfortable with the “alternate” obstetrical providers?
~Who can you contact outside of normal office hours if you have a question about contractions,
discomfort, or pain?
~Are you high risk? Over 35 is considered high risk. If you are considered high risk due to your
age or other medical conditions, talk to your doctor about getting help from a specialist in
monitoring your pregnancy.
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~Talk to your OB about specialists they work with. A perinatologist can provide additional
monitoring, special treatment, progesterone, or other assistance to prevent premature
delivery.
~If you have special health considerations, you’ll want to find out what experience level your doctor has with patients such as yourself.
~Concerning labor and delivery (L &D), ask your OB his approach in the use of intravenous
fluids, continuous electronic fetal monitoring, forceps, suction delivery methods, and
episiotomy. You’ll want to determine if you are comfortable with his response. ~Do all the doctors within the OB practice tend to handle things in the same way? If not, what
are the differences and are you ok with those differences?
~Does your OB take the time to explain things to you so you can understand the parameters of
what may happen during labor and delivery and feel comfortable? If not, you may want to
consider finding another doctor.
Labor and delivery is a stressful and sometimes an agonizing experience. You want a doctor that
best fits your needs. Using the checklist can help you select the right doctor for your family.
Regardless of which way you think you are going to handle delivery, I highly advise you to check
out your hospital’s courses on birthing a baby. You’ll at least be given an introduction to the various methods and will be better informed so you can make your decision.
Right up there with selecting a doctor is determining how you would like to birth your baby.
Are you planning to use an epidural or would you like to go a more natural route?
Birthing Considerations
~Home Birth vs. Hospital Birth
Home births can include birthing centers, water births {some hospitals do offer this}, and the
help of midwives or doulas.
Hospital births offer the most current medical equipment and services. Midwives or doulas
can also assist with hospital births once coordinated with your OB.
~Delivery Types
Vaginal delivery is the most common and, usually, safest form of delivery (know that this
may require an episiotomy).
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Caesarean delivery (C-section) is a surgical method by which the baby is delivered through
an opening made in the abdominal wall of the mother.
~Birth Options
Natural Child Birth means no pain medications of any kind; this usually involves a breathing
or visualization technique. Two well-known techniques are Lamaze and the Bradley Method.
Medicated Birth is when an epidural is given. This is the most common; however, talk with
your doctor about the various options. Examples: systemic pain medication, spinal blocks, or
walking epidurals.
If you are unsure of which route you’d like to go, talk with other women that you know and trust about their experiences with labor and delivery. Again, I also highly advise you to attend
any courses offered at your local hospital that discuss the various methods of delivery.
You do not want to make a decision about how you would like to deliver while you are in the
middle of labor. Get as knowledgeable as you can about what options your OB recommends as
well as the risks and side effects or various procedures and pain relievers.
If you decide to birth your baby in a hospital, make sure you tour the facilities well before
baby’s due date. You can ask questions about water birthing, squat bars, epidurals, emergency
services, waiting room comfort, and find out if there is a place for your husband (or the
person(s) helping you through L&D) to sleep if you want him (them) in the room with you after
your baby is born.
In the next chapter, I’ve provided a list of questions to help you learn more about the services that are available at your hospital when you take your hospital tour.
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Selecting a Hospital
Even though, ideally, you won’t be in the hospital very long, the policies, procedures, and layout
of your selected hospital can greatly impact you.
Questions to Consider when Selecting a Hospital
~What floor/location is labor and delivery? Where do L&D patients park and what entrance is
closest to L&D?
~What is the direct telephone # to the L&D unit?
~What are the hours for the L&D unit? {hopefully 24/7}
~Who can you call 24/7 to discuss the timing of contractions/symptoms of labor?
~What paperwork do you need to have completed before you can be admitted and can you do
that ahead of time? I advise registering at 28 weeks gestation just in case you have a preemie.
~What does the hospital require before you can take baby home? Does the hospital need to
approve the take-home car seat?
~Where is hospital registration? How do you handle checkout?
~When are insurance co-pays paid? Does the hospital have a payment plan available?
~What facilities does the hospital have to support a preemie? Is the mother permitted to
“hotel” stay at the hospital to be close to her preemie if the baby is admitted for an extended
stay?
~Is there a “Ronald McDonald” house on the premises to help families who have preemies?
~For what reasons would an infant be transferred to another hospital and how is it handled?
~Where are the labor and delivery rooms and what comforts are offered there?
~In the L&D what methods of birthing are supported and what extra helps are provided? i.e.
birth pool/bath, squat bar, birth ball, etc.
~Does the hospital make breast pumps & diapers available or do you need to bring your own?
~Once admitted, what are the hospital’s policies in allowing a pregnant mother to eat or drink?
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~Are midwives or doulas (doulas are explained in an upcoming chart) permitted to assist with
L&D? What is the hospital’s policy regarding their involvement?
~What pain medications are available and how/when are they administered? What are the risks
of the various pain medications offered?
~What is the availability of the anesthesiologist? Is there one available 24/7?
~Should an emergency C-section be necessary, where is the surgery performed? Ask to see
those facilities.
~If this is a second child, does the hospital support a vaginal birth after c-section?
~What is the process for evaluating a newborn? Height/Weight? Nursing ability? Vital functions
– vision, hearing, breathing, bilirubin count (indicates Jaundice).
~What precautions are taken to ensure that an infant is secure during its entire stay at the
hospital?
~What care is provided/offered for the mother during recovery? Pain medications?
~What are the visitation policies and hours?
~What food is offered for the recovering mother and her guests?
~If any medical procedures are required for baby how/when are those performed and by
whom? Ex. Circumcision. What are their qualifications?
As you tour the hospital, these questions may spur additional questions, make sure you write
them down and ask your nurse or tour guide to answer those questions or help you find
someone who can.
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Assemble a Birth Team
Right up there with selecting a doctor to help you have a healthy pregnancy and smoother
delivery is the importance of identifying a birth team. For my birth team, I had three people.
My team included my doula (she’s like a mid-wife but with a different level of training), a close
girlfriend who could run out and get meals/drinks and help out, and my husband, who also
acted as my birthing coach.
Why do you need a birth team? Once you go into labor, your body is going to force you to focus
on laboring. You’re not going to be able to spend much energy on making yourself comfortable or on capturing the miracle of delivery. Having a birth team can be helpful for many reasons.
Why You Should Have a Birth Team
~Your birth team should be there to help you find comfort – move pillows, let you suck on a
cool wet washrag when you are parched, pull back your hair, etc.
~Someone else can take pictures of you and your husband with your newborn.
~Most hospitals do not allow you to eat or drink during labor, I was blessed by having a friend
who could run out and get pancakes for us at 3 AM after the baby was born.
~If anything should go wrong and you need to be taken in for surgery and birth by c-section,
having a team of people to encourage and support you can make the whole process less
intimidating.
Whoever you have on your birth team should be a person that understands and supports your
wishes for how you want to birth your baby and will offer assistance when the time to deliver
arrives. Don’t be afraid to ask a friend to help – your body will absorb some trauma with the
birth of a new baby and you will also need time to heal. Assemble your birth team before you
deliver your baby.
My birth team recommendation: add a doula to your team. A doula is a female who is trained
in aiding women through labor and delivery. They are often teachers of non-medicated and
home-birthing methods like Lamaze or Bradley.
For the births of my babies, I opted to have a doula on my birth team.
A doula is only one option to getting help when birthing a baby. One can most certainly choose
to birth their baby with only the help of their OB. Or one can choose to use a midwife to assist.
You may also be able to find a female friend to be there (preferably one who has experienced
labor and delivery) to help with anything you may need.
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I am just a woman who is so thankful I had another person on my team who was not only
knowledgeable about pregnancy and labor and delivery, she had coached us during at-home
visits on how to handle labor and delivery. As a Bradley instructor she was very knowledgeable
about L&D and had spent weeks with us helping us to prepare for delivery.
It truly added to my sense of safety and security knowing that she was in the birthing room and
that she had my and my baby’s best interests in mind. She knew exactly how my husband and I desired to birth our baby.
Doctors birth many babies in a week. In my opinion, it’s difficult for them to come off of autopilot and adjust to your wishes. In addition, once in labor, a huge focus is on baby – can
they pick up baby’s heart rate on the monitor? Doctor’s and nurses did very little for my comfort during delivery. Almost anything related to me personally fell upon the shoulders of
my doula and birthing team.
If your spouse or a close girlfriend is willing to provide some of the support listed in the charts
outlined below, you may not need a doula. You just need an attentive “helper” to help you
through labor and delivery.
I don’t think you have to be planning a “natural” delivery to benefit from the help of a doula. My doula helped in more ways than I can list here. For a little more on the difference between
doulas and midwives I’ve included some definitions below. {Source: http://www.diffen.com/difference/ Doula_vs_Midwife }
• A doula is an assistant who provides physical as well as emotional support during childbirth.
She helps women in a non-medical capacity.
• A midwife is a qualified professional from an institution of her country, which enables her to
help a pregnant woman in delivering a baby.
The World Health Organization defines a midwife as: A person who, having been regularly
admitted to a midwifery educational program that is duly recognized in the country in which it
is located, has successfully completed the prescribed course of studies in midwifery and has
acquired the requisite qualifications to be registered and/or legally licensed to practice
midwifery. The educational program may be an apprenticeship, a formal university program, or
a combination.
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{ Source:http://www.diffen.com/difference/ Doula_vs_Midwife }
A doula or midwife can be especially helpful if you would like a non-medicated labor and
delivery.
There are various methods used for “natural” delivery. My husband and I used the Bradley method for both deliveries, and we delivered in a hospital.
I planned to use Bradley for my first baby but planned to get an epidural with the second baby.
With our second son it was four hours from the time my water broke until he arrived. By the
time they tested my blood to see if I even could get an epidural I was already 8 centimeters
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dilated. The anesthesiologist informed me that due to the blood thinning medications I’d been taking (I have a bad clotting condition), an epidural would put me at risk of becoming
paraplegic. Not good news to hear when I was at 8 centimeters.
I went from planning an epidural to using the skills I’d learned through the Bradley method and the help of my birth team to deliver. I’m so thankful I went into labor and delivery with Bradley training and a doula on my team. I’ve included a list of questions to help you identify the right doula or midwife to help you with your pregnancy and delivery; if you decide a doula is
someone you’d like on your delivery team.
Questions to Ask a Potential Midwife or Doula
I recommend you identify and select a doula when you are at 20 weeks.
~Does your doula/midwife listen to your pregnancy cares and concerns?
~Do they treat you with respect and offer to support your desired pregnancy delivery method?
~Where does she support delivery? At home? Birthing center? Hospital?
~What services does she provide before and after delivery?
~Do they provide services at your preferred hospital in the event it’s needed?
~What are the costs associated with hiring them and can insurance assist?
~What are your doula or midwife’s hours and in the event that he/she is unavailable, who would assist in delivering the baby? Are you comfortable with the “alternate” provider?
~Is he/she available 24/7 if you have a question about contractions, discomfort or pain?
~How does your doula/midwife feel about the use of intravenous fluids, continuous electronic
fetal monitoring, forceps and suction delivery methods, epidural, and potentially c-section in
the event of the need for a hospitalized or medicated birth? Can she provide support in any of
those scenarios?
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To find everything you see in the baby gear section as well as tons of styles, colors and options,
please visit the online Baby Ready store at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20.
Selecting the Right Baby Gear
Shopping for baby is exciting! This is my list of recommended products for new moms. With
two under age three, I can assure you that I am either currently using these products OR have
only just recently graduated out of these products. In some cases the products I used are
already discontinued and I've selected what I would buy now if I were pregnant again today.
At the time of the publication of this document, even some of the items listed here may be
discontinued. If they are no longer available, simply make note of the features described and
use the information to find a similar product.
I will break down products into their category of need. I will also tell you what not to waste
money on - products that you will likely not need. At the end of this section I list some ways you
can save money on your baby item purchases, especially if you are willing to buy used.
To make it super easy to find and shop for these items online, I’ve created an online Amazon store. It takes into account a variety of colors, styles, and product-types to match the colors
that may be desired if you have a baby girl or baby boy. This online list will help you stay
organized. The categories match the attached baby registry list. Please visit my store at:
http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20 to find everything you need for baby.
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Colors and styles for almost every product vary based upon the baby’s gender and your personal preference. If you like the product but would like to see if it is available in other styles,
colors, or fabrics, please visit my online store where I’ve taken the time to include similar products that are suitable for different styles and tastes. You can easily add items from the
Baby Ready online store to your shopping cart to save for later. It can help you keep track of the
things that interest you. You can order as soon as desired or wait until after your baby shower.
You can also create a wish list of the baby items you desire and e-mail your wish list to family
and friends. This makes it easy for loved ones to know the items you desire most for your baby.
Books
If you can, try to read before you have your baby - any down time you have after baby is born
you'll want to use for sleep. You can find all these recommended books online at:
http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Baby Wise - Read chapter six if you are sleep-deprived and don't have much time. This book will
help you establish a routine so your baby can learn to sleep through the night. My boys usually
started sleeping for six-hour lengths at about age four months. Keep in mind that all children
are different. Any challenges should be discussed with your health care provider.
Link: On Becoming Baby Wise, Book 1: Learn How Over One Million Babies Were Trained to
Sleep Through the Night the Natural Way
Healthy Sleep Habits - Happy Child - I did not use this book but have had several trusted moms
highly recommend it. Both books advocate establishing a routine to help your baby learn the
difference between night and day so that they can learn to sleep through the night.
Link: Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
What to Expect when You're Expecting - Helps you stay sane when strange symptoms arise.
Link: What to Expect When You're Expecting, 4th Edition.
Your Baby's First Year - Again, a book for your sanity.
Link: Your Baby's First Year: Third Edition
Your Pregnancy Week by Week - My OB recommended this over “What to Expect When You're Expecting”. I have copies of both. Link: Your Pregnancy Week By Week 5th Edition (Your Pregnancy Series)
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SIDS - (not a book) I've attached a link to an article on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, please
read it and get everyone in your household and all potential caretakers on the same page. 20%
of SIDS deaths occur when a caretaker is watching someone’s baby. Even grandparents need to be brought up to speed.
Link: http://www.babycenter.com/baby-sleep-safety
Sleeping Gear
Yes. Even you, dear mama, can expect your baby to sleep at some point during the night.
Fisher Price Rock N Play
My firstborn was on oxygen and had terrible
reflux (my second also had terrible reflux with colicky-like symptoms) - this “Rock-NPlay” sleeper was a life-saver, both of my sons
slept comfortably in it until about four months
of age. Length of use will vary based upon
your baby's size and ability to squirm. It's short
so you can easily see into it from your bed.
Your baby's head stays elevated - reducing the
risk of SIDS and these newer models come
with a manufacturer's pillow to prevent flat
head syndrome. BOYS/Neutral bunny theme:
Fisher-Price My Little Snugabunny Newborn
Rock n' Play Sleeper, GIRLS kitten/pink theme:
Fisher-Price - Newborn Rock and Play Sleeper,
Pink
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Bassinet
Arms Reach makes a dreamy bassinet/play-yard that you can connect to your own bed, Link:
Arm's Reach Co-Sleeper Original Bassinet, Coco Natural. It's a little on the pricey side so a less
expensive option is a pack-n-play that has a bassinet built into in. Link: Graco Pack N Play
Playard with Bassinet I like this PNP because it includes an arch that acts as a mobile to keep
baby entertained. If you're willing to spend a bit more, buy a model that includes a changing
table - my husband and I used one like this when our eldest slept in the living room.
Pack-N-Play
A PNP is your best option if you want your
baby sleeping with you in the same room
close-by but he or she has outgrown the
bassinet and/or rock-n-play. I had both my
boys sleeping in the same room with me for
about the first six months - after that, they
outgrew the bassinet. SIDS experts say SIDS is
significantly reduced when your baby sleeps
in the same room with its’ mother- call it
mother's instinct but we have a natural built in
sense of safety that no baby product can
replicate (more info on the pack-n-play under
baby gear).
If you want to save money and not purchase a bassinet or PNP, your other option is to move
your baby out of your room and into the nursery in his or her own crib (or put the crib in your
room).
Crib
Don't scrimp on a crib. I had a cheaper drop-side crib (these are now illegal to sell due to
injuries/deaths) for my first-born son, and as he got heavier, it became harder and harder to
lower him as a sleeping baby into the crib. The side eventually dipped and some screws popped
out. We fixed the screws but even now I have to be careful not to lean against my cheaper crib.
A crib with sturdy sidewalls allows you to lean against it with your entire body. Makes gently
laying a sleeping baby down much easier. If you're short like me and need a few extra inches to
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lean over the side of the crib, this nursing stool serves multiple uses - you can use it when you
nurse and when you need to lower baby over the side of the crib.
You can also save money by buying a crib that adapts to a toddler bed and a full-size bed.
Here are a few of my recommendations based upon their value of sturdy-ness and price. To
shop more cribs, go to http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Crib Maker: Stork Craft
A highly recommended and reputable
company. This crib comes in white, espresso
and everything in-between and is convertible.
Stork Craft 4 in 1 Crib.
Crib Maker: Da Vinci
This manufacturer is also highly reputable.
This crib comes in white through espresso and
a few wood shades in-between. Da Vinci
Convertible Crib. Shop colors and styles at:
Breathable crib bumpers
SIDS experts do not recommend using cloth baby bumpers in your crib. Breathable crib
bumpers are a solution to keep your baby from knocking his or her head against hard wood and
they help you sleep easy too. By the time it's safe to put crib bumpers into your baby's crib they
can usually stand up in the crib which makes the bumper a stepping-stone to elevate
themselves up higher and possibly over the edge. If you buy cloth bumpers (as a part of a
bedding set) just know you may never use them.
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Sleep Sack
Both my boys used sleep sacks until they were
at least a year old. Again, SIDS experts DO
NOT recommend blankets or any other soft
bedding in the crib until at least one year of
age. If you're worried about warmth layer on
socks, a onesie, and a fleece sleep-n-play (a
footed PJ). Monitor your baby's temperature
though. Dress them too warmly and it actually
increases SIDS risk.
Sleep sacks do not have sleeves because even fluffy sleeves present a SIDS risk. GIRLS: Pink Halo
Sleep Sack, Medium, BOYS: Halo Sleep Sack. These sacks also come in green and other
colors/patterns. I prefer the micro fleece. You would use cotton in the summer if you do not
have air conditioning. Shop at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20.
Sound Machine
We use the rain setting on our Home-medics Sound Machine. Works like magic with our nearly
three year old and one year old.
Fan
Place a fan in your baby's room. It reduces the risk of SIDS and creates a soothing white noise.
My eldest loves the sound of the fan in his room. I face the fan away from his crib or at an angle
that does not blow air directly onto him. I selected a fan on a pedestal to make it harder for our
son to get his fingers into the fan once he started crawling.
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Monitor
This has been so valuable to us, we still use it
today - and our eldest is almost three. It's just
so nice to be able to see into his room
without having to open a door. We highly
recommend the MobiCam products. We have
three cameras and one receiver. When we had
issues with the receiver we sent the set back
to MobiCam not just once but twice and they
fixed it for free. They have excellent customer
service and support. As a back up (and a
cheaper option) is a sound-only monitor. We
use the Sony Baby Call Nursery Monitor as a
back-up sound only monitor and it works
great.
Feeding Gear
Bottles
When my son was in the NICU we asked the nursing staff if there was a bottle they could
recommend. The brand they recommended was the Dr. Brown’s bottles. Both my boys had gas
and reflux issues so these bottles were a lifesaver. They do not completely eliminate trapped
gas in your infant’s system but they help. The key to bottle feeding is to not let air into the
nipple while the baby is drinking. These bottles reduce gas symptoms but have multiple parts
to clean. Talk to your pediatrician if you’re not sure which bottle works best for your baby.
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High Chair
This Graco Contempo Highchair, Rittenhouse
has all the features I like: wipeable seat cover,
reclining seat, adjustable height, and folds
easily for storage. The tray is removable and
fits into the dishwasher and the colors are
neutral which should match any dining area
decor. You might find something you like
better style-wise - just keep in mind the
features above - especially the recline feature
- you want it to recline to feed an infant.
Classic Pooh
Forecaster
Soho Square
Nursing
If nursing is something you want to make a part of your lifestyle with baby, check out nursing
classes or support groups at your local hospital. Le Leche League is also an excellent source of
information and support. Link: http://www.llli.org
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My Breast Friend
Hands down, this is the best product under
$50 I purchased for my baby and me. The
Velcro band ensures a snug fit from the time
your little one arrives until you lose all the
baby weight. My baby slept on it, nursed on
it, I even changed him a few times on it. Do
not waste your time on boppy {unless you just
want a pillow to prop your baby up on}. You
can’t walk around your house wearing your nursing pillow with both hands free to hold
your baby unless you get the My Breast Friend
nursing pillow. It even has a pocket to put a
pacifier or TV remote. It comes in blue,
chocolate, and other patterns/colors.
To see the green click here, link: My Brest Friend Deluxe Pillow, Light Green Some other colors:
Pink My Breast Friend and Blue My Breast Friend Shop styles at:
Nursery Glider
You'll want a Nursery Glider to go w/your crib- A rocking chair or rocking reclining chair are
things I highly recommend for baby's room. I have three in my home right now - one in each of
the rooms where my boys sleep and one in the spare bedroom. If you can, try to order one that
matches your crib set. Shop colors and styles at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
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Medela Breast Pump
There are two options here. The more
affordable one comes with fewer accessories.
The fancier version has an extra storage bag
and other accessories. Both can be made into
hands-free pumps with a strapless hands-free
bra (I highly recommend the hands free bra - it
makes pumping so much easier - pumping
takes 10-15 minutes). With my firstborn at 30
weeks and a weak suck I pumped for 13
months using this machine, and even though
pumping is not luxurious this tool made it
easy, sanitary, and simple.
You can clean the parts by boiling them in water to sterilize them. Once sterile you can keep
them clean with warm water and dish soap. If you think you'll need to pump milk - this is the
best breast pump in my opinion. The other nice thing, it's so commonly used you can find spare
parts at Walmart (or Target) if needed.
Milk Storage
I recommend Lansinoh storage bags. Don't shake milk before giving it in a bottle to baby - it
traps air bubbles in the milk increasing the need to burp and or colicky-like symptoms, stir
warm milk with a stir stick (I used a butter knife). After you pump milk, store it in a bag by
pouring it into the bag and then carefully pressing out all the air to prevent freezer burn. It
closes just like a zip-lock bag. Defrost the bags upside down in warm water - I used a water
pitcher full of warm water. If the bag leaks, the leak usually comes from the bottom of the
storage bag, by defrosting it upside down you don't lose any milk during the defrost. Never
microwave milk - it changes the properties of the milk AND can be dangerous for baby as
microwaves tend to heat unevenly. Lansinoh: The 50 count box of bags link is here.
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Munchkin Bottle Warmer
This has two trays: one for a bottle and one to
sterilize a pacifier. The tray for the pacifier can
later be used to heat jars of baby food. I still
use mine. I don't like to microwave baby food
due to uneven heating. Always stir food and or
milk before serving to ensure even heat
distribution.
Nursing Cover
Udder Covers has some beautiful nursing covers that are large enough to wrap around your
sides as you nurse your baby. The cover has slip D-rings for adjustable neckline and a metal
expansion lip so you can see your baby while he or she is nursing - this helps make nursing
easier. On the following pages I’ll share how you can get a nursing cover free.
Breast Pads
A mom of six babies (not all at once, of course) swore by Johnson's breast pads so these are the
only kind I ever used and the ones I can recommend. (Johnson's 60 count or Johnson's 36
count.) You may want to get the smaller quantity first and see if you even need these. I only
needed them for a short time in the beginning until my body adjusted to the needs of my baby.
Shop nursing items at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20.
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Nursing Bra
I love my nursing bra so much that I bought
two and almost never go without one on. It's
the Bravado Body Silk Seamless Nursing Bra. I
sleep in it and wear it all day. It's so
comfortable and adjusts as you change in
weight. In fact, I'll be sad when I go back to a
regular bra unless I can find one just like it that
isn't a nursing bra. I tried another bra that had
underwire and regretted it - the wires pinched
my sides and were uncomfortable. Trust me,
when you've got babies to chase and pick up,
you want comfort.
Nursing Tops
I do not recommend buying yourself a wardrobe of nursing tops. Just get a few - visit
Motherhood Maternity to try them on. Once you get the hang of nursing and as you start
losing baby weight you can find V-neck shirts you can wear that still allow you to easily access
your breasts. You can also lift your shirt up and if you're using a nursing pillow no one will be
able to see much of anything (plus you have a nursing cover). In fact, I found a zippered bathing
suit cover-up in terry cloth at Target that was perfect for nursing. I just un-zipped to nurse and
wore a cardigan underneath to stay warm. This was my uniform along with my PJ pants for the
first few months of my eldest's life.
Changing/Bath Gear
Shop bath at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Changing Table
Buy one that matches your crib. I would also warn against one that is attached to the crib as it
poses a safety hazard for a toddler. The brands I've listed for crib purchase are highly reputable
and they make quality products. My best advice is to buy your dresser, changing table and crib
from the same company.
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Diaper Pail
I love my Baby Trend Diaper Champ Deluxe. It fits a standard 13 gal kitchen trash bag, which
means I don't have to buy special bags. It also does a fairly decent job of keeping the nursery
from smelling for the first six months. Once your baby starts to eat solid foods you'll want to
dispose of "poppy" diapers somewhere other than the nursery no mater what kind of diaper
pail you are using.
Desitin
This is the best diaper rash cream I have used. I tried Butt Paste, Arbonne, generic, and a few
others I can't even remember. But Desitin is the best for clearing up terrible diaper rash. It
came recommended by the NICU nurses when we brought our eldest home and they knew
what they were talking about. Our eldest had watery stool and this healed his skin. One mom
told me her baby cried when she used Desitin – it seemed to burn his skin. If this happens to
you, my second choice would be Butt Paste – it doesn’t have the same effect.
Cetaphil
If your baby has sensitive skin - ours has eczema, Cetaphil makes a great baby wash. It came
highly recommended by our pediatrician.
Tub with Sling/Insert
A tub that converts from infant tub to pretoddler tub makes the most sense for several
reasons. First off is safety. You want your baby
safely cradled in the water - which is why a
sling is a good idea. The second major reason
is useful longevity/economy. Once you take
the sling out it should still be useful for you
and your baby once he/she can sit upright. My
boys both loved the rainforest bath center and
here I've linked both the pink and green
versions. Pink Fisher Price Tub and Fisher Price
Rainforest Bath Center.
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Wash Cloth
I know it seems silly, but if you want to take any pictures of your baby in the tub you'll want a
cute wash mitt or wash towel for baby. I happen to like this one. Jumping Beans Bath Mitt Frog. You can also get a hooded bath towel, but honestly they don't seem to dry as well (they
tend to run a little thin). So you may want to get some for pictures but we use a large bath
sheet to dry our little ones.
Bath Spout Cover
You probably won't need this right away but I
do recommend a bath spout cover. Once your
baby starts moving around in the tub you'll
want to protect them from the sharp edges of
the spout. Skip Hop Whale Spout Cover.
Wipes Warmer
Munchkin Warm Glow Wipe Warmer. At first I
did not think I'd need one of these. But let me
say, one swipe with a cold wipe and you're
likely to trigger a shower on your hand, and all
over the changing table if you neglect to get
one of these. I highly recommend this brand it has a built in night light and the wipes stay
moist even after long periods of being stored
inside (as long as the lid is closed).
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SITZ bottles
I received two of these as a part of my care
package when I checked out of the hospital.
They also make wonderful aides for bathing
baby. Lavette Bottle - Perineal Irrigation
Bottle.
General Gear
More styles and colors at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Diaper Bag
Petunia Pickle Bottom makes the BEST diaper
bag. I can't believe all the stuff I can fit into it
and it still looks stylish no matter what.
Pockets for bottles, creams, extra clothes,
diapers, food, you name it. It converts from a
satchel to backpack and has hooks that you
can hang from most strollers. It's a little on the
pricey side but ohhhh so worth it. I LOVE mine.
It comes in every color combo imaginable.
These are pricey. I actually purchased mine on
eBay for $35. Worth every penny.
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Carrier
Ergo Baby Carrier Black with Camel Lining ergonomically correct for baby AND for mom. I
tried other carriers and they put the straps on
my shoulders but nothing at the waist. This
created an ache in my lower back which made
carrying baby painful. The ERGO places the
baby's weight on your hips AND aligns baby's
spine. It can be worn as a front or back pack.
Baby always faces you. Baby can-not face out,
but I seriously doubt you can find a more
comfortable carrier. You can also get the
infant liner if you think you'll need it. This
comes in other colors, organic fabric, and
patterns too.
Shop gear and other recommended items in my online Amazon shop at:
Portable Chair
If you travel (even just to go eat at a friend's
house), this portable chair comes in handy. It
also reclines and comes in four beautiful
colors. Fisher-Price Space Saver High Chair.
Pack-N-Play
As above, I recommend Graco Pack N Play Playard with Bassinet, Pasadena. I like this PNP
because it includes an arch that acts as a mobile to keep baby entertained. If you're willing to
spend a bit more, buy a model that includes a changing table - my husband and I used one like
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this when our eldest slept in the living room. Graco Pack 'N Play Playard with Reversible Napper
and Changer, Roman.
Strollers
The best stroller depends upon its use. I have owned five strollers so far and each has been
based upon its use. If you check out my online store - I’ve listed some of my favorite strollers there.
All purpose car-seat and stroller system
Chicco Cortina Keyfit 30 Travel System - my
husband and I were required to attend a four
hour long car seat safety course before we
could take our firstborn home from the
hospital. The Keyfit 30 was the highest
recommended car seat. It can carry a preemie
to a pre-toddler. I love this car seat and can
highly recommend it. The stroller can sit with
the car seat inside of it until the baby can sit
upright on his/her own. It comes in several
beautiful colors including navy, pink, red and
green. The KeyFit car seat has an insert to
keep baby’s head from rolling back and forth. The neck insert is provided by the
manufacturer. If you purchase a neck roll or
something else to secure baby’s head and neck you may void the manufacturer’s warranty – be sure to read your instruction
manual carefully. If you want a neck insert –
buy a car seat that comes with one.
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Sport/Jogging Stroller
BOB Revolution CE Single Stroller, Black best
sport stroller on the market - highly
recommended by moms I know. This also
comes in other colors. When selecting a
stroller, think safety - easy to fold-away,
allows your little one to sit up or recline,
safety strap to prevent runaway, and then
comfort - adjustable handles, cup holder, etc.
Always check the weight of a stroller – you
want to make sure you can lift it and get it into
your vehicle without outside assistance.
See my top stroller pics at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Peg Pergo
If you want super lightweight AND sturdy try
Peg Pergo, here she is in Geranium (red), and
she also comes in black and java. I have two of
these - a single and a double and just love
them b/c they are so lightweight. My Chicco
car seat fits right into the stroller seat.
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Car Seat
Your infant will eventually outgrow the infant
carrier and you'll need a larger car seat. The
best brand out there is Britax - a brand you
can trust - they test and prove their car seats
to European crash standards. I made the
mistake of trying to save $40 and purchased
an Evenflo. My toddler tore apart the
Styrofoam and I've regretted this purchase
ever since. I should have spent the extra
money and gotten the Britax. It comes in many
different colors so you're sure to find a style
you love. Pictured here is the Britax
Boulevard 70-G3 Convertible Car Seat, Onyx.
IMPORTANT NOTE: Car Seat - BUY NEW. The plastic dries out and can crack over time. Plus the
manufacturer's warranty does have a three to five year expiration date. Do not buy
independent neck rests or inserts - waste of money and voids the manufacturer's warranty on
the safety and effectiveness of the car seat. Our car seat safety class instructor and “The Car Seat Lady” online says BUY NEW, so I say BUY NEW.
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Entertainment for Baby
A variety of colors and styles at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
When thinking about entertainment for baby you've got to think about two things: the baby's
development (they can't hold their head up for at least the first few months) and the layout of
your home. Do you want to be dragging a swing from room to room or would you like to have
an exersaucer in the living room, a pack-n-play in the kitchen, and a swing in the bedroom? I
like to have a place to put baby in my most frequented rooms, and I don't like having to move
things around (it's hard to do when you are already carrying a baby). So, with this in mind, here
is what I recommend for baby.
Play Mat
There are so many cute options out there. We
loved our Fisher-Price Rainforest Melodies and
Lights Deluxe Gym - it has so many
attachments and the cutest jungle music and a
soothing music option too.
If you are having a girl I love the mirror and
the pillow for tummy time in this Infantino
Baby Girl Animals Twist and Fold Activity Gym
and Playmat
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Tummy Time
We used the Tiny Love Tummy Time Fun
Activity Mat for tummy time with our boys. At
first, no baby likes tummy time but you need
to do it in order to prevent flat head syndrome
and help them get ready for crawling.
Activity Center
This is a great place to put baby once they can
hold their head upright. Evenflo ExerSaucer
Triple Fun - Jungle. There are so many options
in style and color.
Shop:
and look for the activity center that matches
your decor/needs.
Swing
I love this swing because it not only swings
back and forth but side to side. Fisher-Price
Cradle 'N Swing, My Little Snugabunny - the
“My little sweetie” version comes in pink. If this swing is a little pricey for you, I can also
recommend Fisher-Price Open Top Take-Along
Swing - it's portable and doesn't take up too
much space. Never rest a swing or unsecured
baby on top of a kitchen counter or table –
baby may squirm and wriggle out.
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Play Table
Another mom turned me on to this play table Leap Frog Learn and Grove Musical Table. You
won't need this right away but at about nine months this is a great toy for baby. The legs are
removable so it can rest on the floor and as baby grows its a great table for them to pull
themselves up to play with.
Loads of colors and styles at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20
Clothes
You’ll need clothes for your baby and I’ve included a list on the baby registry checklist. Some things to keep in mind:
Babies grow quickly and they will outgrow clothes within three to four months. Try to limit how
many items you have in each size. The list I’ve included here has the basics you’ll need at three and six months. Newborns grow very rapidly and will not be in newborn clothes for even three
months (unless you have a preemie like we did).
Wash new clothes before putting them on your baby. My sister is a dermatologist and see
recommends, “All – free and clear” laundry detergent. Use a fragrance-free detergent. She
explained to me that babies have very sensitive skin. The preservatives used to keep cotton
looking “crisp” in the store can irritate a baby’s skin. It’s best to wash things before putting them on baby.
When purchasing clothes for your baby you’ll want to think about how easy or difficult it is to put on or take off their clothes. I loved to use zippered sleep-n-plays because they were easy to
get my baby into and out of. And during night time diaper changes you want the easiest sleeper
or pajama to access in the event of diaper changing. Typically, I would change my baby’s diaper every two to three hours – both during the day and through the night.
Ways to Save
~E-Bay – I saved a bundle on my diaper bag by bidding on eBay.
~Craig’s List – This is a great way to purchase larger used items.
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~Garage Sales – Another great way to buy used goods – just be aware of safety issues that may
arise from used toys or gear.
~Freecycle.com – Check this regularly – people often get rid of the baby things they no longer
need - try to get familiar with product recalls before venturing into picking up used goods.
~Local Mother’s of Preschoolers (MOPS) group - oftentimes MOPS moms donate to the group.
~Just Between Friends Consignment Sale - if you can find one in your area they usually have a
sale in the fall and one in the spring. Buying and selling used baby items is a great way to save
money. Just know that there is no guarantee that what you are looking for will be at the sale, so
you'll want to buy critical items before baby arrives.
~Friends who have same sex children just a year or so ahead of your baby - see if you can buy
their used items.
As a parent you’ll want to check on safety recalls for various products. Register your purchases and take advantage of being the first to know if a product recall is enacted on a product. I
cannot make any claims to safety. Any use of any product I recommend here is at your own risk.
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Free Baby Gear
One of the great things about the digital age is that you can get free things online. Oftentimes
you’ll be asked to pay shipping and handling but there are some wonderful baby gear items
that you can basically get for free. By the time I learned about these items I already had them
so I did not get to take advantage of these freebies, but if you’d like to get some free gear online, you’ll enjoy this chapter of the book. Please keep in mind that at the time of publication these freebies were available. Online sellers
can change promotional offers at any time so these resources may or may not still be available.
My intent, of course, is to help you get as many freebies as possible. To access these freebies,
simply type in the web address, add the item you desire and enter the coupon code. If you use
any of these links and purchase items in addition to the free stuff I may make a tiny commission
– usually 3-4%. Thanks for your support!
FREE Carseat Canopy
Go to www.CarseatCanopy.com
Click on “Shop Now”
Select the car seat canopy fabric and colors
that you like
Once selected the item will automatically be
added to your cart
You will see a section where you can add your
coupon
Type in BABYREADY1
A $50.00 discount will be applied to your
order
39
FREE Baby Sling
Go to www.SevenSlings.com
Select the Baby Sling fabric and colors that you
like
added to your cart
coupon
Type in BABYREADY1
A $40.00 Discount will be applied to your
order
Nursing Cover
Go to www.UdderCovers.com
Click on the “Shop Now”
Select the fabric and colors that you would like
added to your cart
You will see a section where you can type your
coupon
Type in BABYREADY1
A $35 discount will be applied to your order
40
FREE Nursing Pillow
Go to www.NursingPillow.com
Select the nursing pillow fabric and colors that
you like
added to your cart
coupon
Type in BABYREADY1
A $40 discount will be applied to your order
FREE Baby Leggings
Go to www.babyleggings.com
Select the fabrics and colors you like
added to your cart
coupon
Type in BABYREADY1
A $50.00 discount will be applied to your
order
41
The Honest Company
The Honest Company offers some fabulous FREE trial sized versions of their products. They
specialize in all-natural, non-toxic, high performing diapering essentials as well as personal care
and cleaning solutions.
Go to: https://www.honest.com/account/select-bundle and select your FREE trial order.
42
EverydayFamily.com
Go to: http://www.everydayfamily.com/free-baby-stuff/ to visit Everyday Family.com
They have a vast collection of free offers and specials from their sponsored partners like
Gerber, Pampers, and more.
43
American Baby Magazine
To subscribe, go to: http://www.parents.com/american-baby-magazine/
Find the magazine and subscription link to sign up and receive your FREE subscription. The
magazines listed here offer coupons and discounts.
44
Baby Talk Magazine
To subscribe go to https://www.valuemags.com/babytalk/freeoffer.asp
Want more? Google “free baby gear” or something similar and find all sorts of free stuff online. Due to the short promotional season of many retail offers, it is impossible to include all of the
free baby products available within the pages of this book.
45
Baby Registry Checklist
This list includes everything I mentioned on the preceding pages and gives you room to add
anything else you’d like to add to your registry. Category
Books
Sleep
Item
Qty.
Needed
Baby Wise
1
Healthy Sleep
Habits Happy
Child
1
What to Expect
When You’re Expecting
1
Your Baby’s First Year
1
Your Pregnancy
Week by Week
1
Rock N Play
1
Bassinet
1
Crib
1
Crib Mattress
1
Washable Crib
Mattress Pads
2
Fitted Crib
Sheets
2-3
Breathable Crib
Bumper
1
Sleep Sack
2-4
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
46
Category
Sleep
Feedings
Item
Qty.
Needed
Sound Machine
1
Fan
1
Monitor
1
Soft, light
receiving
blankets
2
Heavier
blankets (colder
climates)
2
Crib Mobile
1
Crib Soother
1
Nursery Glider
1
My Breast
Friend
1
Bottles
4
Medella Breast
Pump
1
Milk Storage
50 pack
Bottle Warmer
1
Nursing Cover
2
Breast Pads
1 box
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
47
Category
Feedings
Changing/Bath
Item
Qty.
Needed
Nipple Cream
1
Nursing Bra
2-3
Changing Table
1
Changing Pad
1
Changing Pad
Cover
2
Diaper Pail
1
Desitin
2
Diapers
40
newborn
Cetaphil
1
Tub w/Sling
1
Wash Cloth
3
Bath Spout
Cover
1
Wipes Warmer
1
SITZ Bottle
2
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
48
Category
Changing/Bath
Gear
Entertainment
Item
Qty.
Needed
Hooded Towel
2
Diaper Bag
1
Carrier
1
High Chair
1
Portable Chair
1
Pack N Play
1
Stroller
1
Car Seat and
Stroller System
1
Sport/Jogging
Stroller
1
Peg Pergo
1
Car Seat
1
Play mat
Circle (Girl or
Boy)
1
Tummy Time
1
Activity Center
1
Swing
1
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
49
Category
Entertainment
Clothes
Item
Qty.
Needed
Play Table
1
Dresser
1
Sleep-n-Play: a
footed onesie
that can be
used as PJs or
day wear
10-12
Special Outfits
3-5
Undershirts –
side button
3-5
Pull on pants
5-7
Socks or booties
5-10
Hats
1-3
Sweater or
jacket
2
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
50
Category
Item
Qty.
Needed
Notes
Received
Thanks Sent
51
Setting Up the Nursery
As I mentioned in the “Baby Gear” section, having your newborn in the same room as it’s mother is a factor that can help prevent SIDS. So you may decide to hold off on placing your
baby in their nursery until they are a few months old.
Some books support the idea of moving baby into their nursery as soon as you bring them
home to help them learn to sleep through the night earlier.
You may also be able to keep baby close by in a room across the hall from the master bedroom
or someplace that is easily accessible during all hours.
Whatever decision you make concerning the location of your sleeping baby, the two most
important things to consider when setting up your nursery (or place where the baby sleeps) are
safety and ease of use.
Safety & Ease of Use
These two things need only be limited by your budget and available space. Once these things
are satisfied then you can worry about if it will be pink or purple, green or blue, wallpapered in
flowers or bordered in race cars.
Safety
You want to make sure not to place the crib or changing table anywhere where the baby could
get tangled up in (or reach for) extension cords or cords from vertical blinds. It’s also a good idea to keep things away from the crib that they might be able to grab onto – like a tablecloth
on a nearby side table.
Even if you cover electrical outlets with outlet covers, I always err on the side of extra caution
and make sure to pull the crib away from any outlets.
Depending upon your room, you’ll also want to be mindful of airflow. If you have heating that comes up from the floor you’ll want to avoid placing your crib directly over it. You’ll also want to consider where a ceiling fan or air conditioning vent blow air. Babies are sensitive to cold.
I always like to set the crib up in a location where I can easily view it if I open the door to the
room and peek in. That way, if I need to get a visual, I can do it without having to careen around
a piece of furniture or the door itself.
52
Ease of Use
You’ll want to think about what activities will be performed in your baby’s nursery. More than likely, your baby will not only sleep there but may be changed, fed, and rocked there as well.
I highly recommend purchasing a glider-rocker for baby’s room. If you can, try to test drive any rocker before you purchase. We had a few “noisy” rockers before we found the ones that we are using now.
While sitting in the rocker ask yourself if it provides the back and neck support you need. Do
you want covered and padded arms, wood arms, or no arms? That depends upon your plans for
feeding baby. Do you plan to nurse, bottle-feed, or a combination and will you be using a pillow
of some sort during feedings? I recommend a rocker with arms as it gives you extra support
when feeding baby.
One option is to take your pillows with you when you go shopping and see which rocker-gliders
best suit your planned method of feeding baby.
It’s also a good idea to have a side table next to the rocker that you can use for things like
pacifiers, bottles, a drink for you, books, lamp, or a CD or MP3 player so you can play soothing
music for baby.
A new mom can spend hours every day in a rocker either feeding or rocking her baby. A
footstool or nursing stool is wonderful for gaining more leverage when rocking or for propping
feet up for some rest.
Reading books to baby is a great way to spend time together and provide entertainment for
mom and a learning experience for baby. For a list of wonderful books to read to your baby,
please visit the online Baby Ready store at: http://astore.amazon.com/babyready04-20. We
have a nightstand on one side of our rocker and a bookcase on the other.
This has been the prefect set-up as our baby grew into a toddler and eventually started
selecting which books he wanted us to read to him during his bedtime routine.
Another important piece of furniture is the changing table. When selecting a changing table
you want to consider its height, length and storage capabilities. Height and length are
important because you’ll start out lifting a baby but you’ll end up lifting a toddler.
Will the changing table provide support for a growing child? And will the table make it easier for
you? If the table is too tall or too short it will place a greater demand on your back. You want
the greatest “ease of use” when selecting a changing table.
53
You’ll want to position your changing table so that you have enough room next to it to place
the diaper pail. You may also want a laundry basket close by. My changing table has so much
storage that I actually use a basket on a shelf of the changing table to store clean and/or dirty
clothes.
A changing table is extra useful if you can store the things you use regularly on it. We purchased
a changing table with empty shelves and then placed lined baskets on those shelves and filled
them with Desitin, baby oil, lotion, diapers, wipes and clothes.
I highly recommend purchasing blackout blinds or curtains with thermal backing or lining for
baby’s room. This is extremely helpful for facilitating nap times.
Other items we have found to be very valuable in our nursery: a fan, baby monitor, night-light,
easy to see and read clock, and wipes warmer.
Once you’ve taken into consideration the safety of your baby, how you plan to use the room and the best way to make that room easy to use, you can setup the floor plan and take
dimensions of available wall and floor space. This will help you determine what size furniture
you can acquire for your baby’s nursery. You may not be able to fit everything on this list, or you may have ample room. Either way,
from baby’s perspective, the most important thing is you. What baby wants even more than a
spectacular nursery is: time in your arms, hearing your voice and feeling your touch. You
already have what’s most important to baby. With a little planning and your special touch, you’ll have the prefect setup for your baby when
he or she joins your growing family.
54
Prepare with Frozen Meals
Frozen meals, meals provided by friends, take-out, and/or delivery can give you the break you
need so you can get some rest.
If you like to plan ahead of time, consider planning your meals with a “meal-planner”. It’s a calendar where you list Saturday through Sunday and spell out on what days you’ll be eating a particular dish. This helps you stock up as well as plan with friends and family who offer to
make meals to help you with baby.
Once you’ve decided what meals you plan to eat for every day of the week you can create your weekly “shopping list” to ensure you have everything you need for the week. In order to have enough food prepared to give you a break from cooking, my advice is to make
ahead two to three weeks worth of freezer meals. This will help with having enough meals
ready to heat and on hand for those early weeks when you will be sleep deprived.
Below I’ve attached a series of recipes called “Power Cooking.” These were provided by my
Pampered Chef (PC) consultant and are being reused here with permission. If you’ve ever used PC before you’ll recognize some of the names of their products. If you don’t use or have PC products, don’t be discouraged, a similar product from another brand will work equally well.
You’ll want to start preparing these meals at the start of your third trimester while you have the energy. You can also recruit a girlfriend to help, making the whole process a little easier on you.
Helpful Hints to Prepare for “Power Cooking”
~Clean out your freezer and refrigerator the day before shopping.
~Plan to use containers designed for the freezer, or purchase Ziploc freezer-quality storage
bags.
~Purchase a new, black permanent marker for labeling the bags or containers.
~Find a comfy spot and make your shopping list in pencil. Go through the recipes and list the
ingredients. This list will be your Master List. Alter the quantity of items on your list as you
reread each recipe so that you do not over-purchase. Then go through your freezer, fridge, and
pantry and mark off items that you find. A primary goal of “Power Cooking” is to SAVE MONEY. Taking an accurate inventory of what you already have on hand will help you prevent overbuying.
~Keep a copy of your list so that you do not have to recreate your list in the future.
55
~Shop the day before you plan to cook so that you have the energy to have fun in the kitchen.
~The night before your “Power Cooking” day, clear off your countertops; you will need the space. Disinfect your countertops, gather all your ingredients and group them by recipe. Make
sure your tea towels and dishcloths are clean. Unload your dishwasher and empty your garbage
cans, including your recyclables garbage can. In the morning, you will be ready to start your
“Power Cooking.”
Helpful Hints for Shopping
~Shop at your “bulk” store first and purchase in large quantities. Then shop at your regular grocery store and buy store-brand items.
~Shop the inner aisles first, produce next, then bakery and frozen foods last.
~Watch the “sell by” dates on the meat; always select meat from the bottom of the stack for the freshest cuts.
Helpful Hints for “Power Cooking” Day
~Begin by labeling your freezer bags or freezer-safe containers using a permanent marker.
Write the name of the recipe and date it was prepared for the freezer. Also list anything that
needs to be added from the pantry and/or fridge {things that were not added to the frozen
portion of the recipe}.
~Record the start and finish times of foods that are cooking at the same time.
~Fill the sink with hot, soapy water. Wash the dishes as you go. When you are completely
finished using a tool, place it in the dishwasher for less cleanup later.
~Chop and grate all fresh foods at once and place in bowls on your countertop. “Scoop” required amounts when assembling your meals. Freeze leftover veggies into ½ cup portions for
later use.
~Cool your cooked ingredients in an area away from your prep area so that you can continue
your recipes without feeling short on space. Pour cooled ingredients into freezer bags or
containers that are appropriate for food quantity to avoid freezer burn. Squeeze extra air out
of filled freezer bags.
~Pull tomorrow night’s dinner out of the freezer and place in fridge before bedtime.
~After cleaning up, go out to dinner and reward yourself for a good day’s work!
56
In creating these dishes you will, at times, cook the ingredients first, freeze and reheat. In some
cases you will combine ingredients, freeze and then cook.
Power Cooking Recipes
Taco Soup (cook, freeze, reheat)
2 lbs. fresh, lean ground beef
1 onion, coarsely chopped
4 oz. can diced green chilies
taco seasoning packet
Ranch dressing/dip packet
2 cans corn, undrained
4 cans stewed tomatoes, petite diced,
undrained
1 can pinto beans, undrained
1 can kidney beans, undrained
½ c. chopped fresh cilantro, optional
grated Monterey Jack and/or cheddar cheese
Chop onions. Brown meat and onions in 8-qt. Stockpot. Open cans using a can opener and add
remaining ingredients and cook over medium heat for 30 minutes. Cool completely and pour
into freezer bag. Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Reheat to serve. Using Deluxe Cheese
Grater, grate cheese on top of soup served in Coffee & More Cups.
Pull-Apart Bread (quick, no-freeze recipe)
Pillsbury Grands! (8-count) biscuits
3 T. butter
2 cloves garlic
1 t. Pampered Chef Italian Seasoning Mix
3 T. grated parmesan cheese
Melt butter in 8” Sauté Pan over medium heat. Crush garlic using Garlic Press into pan. Using
Deluxe Cheese Grater, grate cheese into pan and add seasoning mix; stir using Mix ‘N Scraper.
Quarter biscuits using Kitchen Shears; toss to coat evenly. Bake at 375 degrees for 20 minutes.
Invert onto Simple Additions Medium Square and use Mini-Serving Spatula to serve.
57
Pork Baby-Back Ribs (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. pork baby-back ribs
1 t. chili powder
1 T. vinegar
¼ t. pepper
¾ c. ketchup
1 T. Worcestershire sauce
1 t. salt
onion
Cut long rack of ribs in half using Chef’s Knife; place racks of ribs into freezer bag. Add
remaining ingredients to freezer bag, except onion, and coat ribs well. Squeeze air out of bag
and freeze. Ribs will marinate while defrosting in refrigerator for 24 hours. Remove ribs from
bag and place in Stoneware Rectangular Baker. Pour excess sauce from bag onto ribs. Using
Ultimate Slice & Grate, slice onion into rings and place on top of ribs. Cover and bake at 400
degrees for 1½-2 hours.
Mexican Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 16 oz. jar mild or medium salsa
or tenderloins
2-3 cloves freshly pressed garlic
½ c. finely chopped onion
2 ½ oz. can sliced black olives, drained
sliced or grated Monterey Jack cheese
Place frozen chicken into freezer bag. Combine remaining ingredients except cheese. Pour
sauce into bag and coat chicken well. Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Chicken will marinate
as it defrosts in refrigerator for 24 hours. Remove chicken from bag and place in Stoneware
Rectangular Baker. Pour excess sauce from bag over top of chicken. Bake, uncovered, at 400
degrees for
45 minutes (30 minutes for tenderloins). Using Deluxe Cheese Grater, grate cheese onto
chicken; bake 10 minutes and serve.
58
Mushroom Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 1 can Golden Cream-of-Mushroom
or tenderloins
1 c. milk
8 oz. carton fresh mushrooms, sliced
4 slices crumbled bacon
2 T. lemon juice (zest before juicing – zest
needed for another recipe)
grated parmesan cheese
Place frozen chicken into freezer bag. Combine remaining ingredients except parmesan cheese.
Pour sauce into bag and coat chicken well. Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Chicken will
marinate as it defrosts in refrigerator for 24 hours. Remove chicken from bag and place in
Stoneware Rectangular Baker. Pour excess sauce from bag onto chicken. Bake, uncovered, at
400 degrees for 45 minutes (30 minutes for tenderloins). Using Deluxe Cheese Grater, grate
cheese onto chicken AFTER baking. Serve with rice and salad.
Teriyaki Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 10 oz. bottle teriyaki sauce
or tenderloins
1 T. vinegar
½ finely chopped onion
Place frozen chicken and all ingredients into freezer bag, coat chicken well. Squeeze air out of
bag and freeze. Chicken will marinate as it defrosts in refrigerator for 24 hours. Remove chicken
from bag and place in Stoneware Rectangular Baker. Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 45
minutes (30 minutes for tenderloins). Serve with stir-fried rice & vegetables.
59
Caesar Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 2 (16 oz.) bottles Creamy Caesar Salad
or tenderloins
dressing
grated parmesan cheese
optional: lettuce, box of croutons OR cooked
pasta
Place frozen chicken into freezer bag; add garlic and one bottle of dressing. Coat chicken well.
Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Chicken will marinate as it defrosts in refrigerator for 24
hours. Remove chicken from bag and place in Stoneware Rectangular Baker.
Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 45 minutes (30 minutes for tenderloins). Using Deluxe
Cheese Grater, grate cheese and set aside. SALAD: Slice chicken and serve warm over lettuce,
tossed with half of second bottle of dressing, parmesan cheese and croutons. Or serve chicken
over cooked pasta and top with grated cheese.
Parmesan Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 1 c. Italian bread crumbs
or tenderloins
2 t. lemon zest
1 c. grated parmesan cheese
Place frozen chicken into freezer bag and seal. In separate freezer bag, combine remaining
ingredients. Rubber band the two bags together and place into freezer. When ready to bake,
defrost chicken in refrigerator for 24 hours. Coat with breadcrumb mixture and place in
Stoneware Rectangular Baker. Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 45 minutes (30 minutes for
tenderloins).
60
BBQ Chicken (combine, freeze, cook)
2 lbs. frozen boneless, skinless chicken breasts 1 c. mild salsa
or tenderloins
1 c. ketchup
1/3 c. brown sugar
Place frozen chicken into freezer bag. Combine all ingredients and pour into bag and coat
chicken well. Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Chicken will marinate as it defrosts in
refrigerator for 24 hours. Remove chicken from bag and place in Stoneware Rectangular Baker.
Pour excess sauce from bag over top of chicken. Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 45
minutes
(30 minutes for tenderloins). Serve with Cornbread Twists, baked on a Round 15” or Rectangular Stone.
Tater Tot Casserole (cook, freeze, reheat)
1 lb. fresh, lean ground beef
½ c. chopped onion
1 can Golden Cream-of-Mushroom soup
½ c. milk
salt & pepper to taste
1 c. grated cheddar cheese
1 bag frozen tater tots
Brown ground beef and onion. Combine with remaining ingredients except cheese and frozen
tater tots. Place mixture into freezer bag. Squeeze air out of bag and freeze. Defrost beef
mixture in refrigerator for 24 hours. Using Deluxe Cheese Grater, grate cheese and set aside.
Place beef mixture in Stoneware Deep Dish Baker and top with cheese and tater tots before
baking at 350 degrees for 30 minutes till bubbly. Serve with mixed vegetables and fruit salad.
61
Meat Loaf (cook, freeze, reheat)
2 lbs. fresh, lean ground beef
I c. Italian bread crumbs
2 eggs
6 oz. can tomato sauce
1 c. finely chopped onion
salt & pepper to taste
Combine all ingredients in Classic Batter Bowl. Shape into two large loaves or four mini-loaves.
Place loaves into Stoneware Rectangular Baker or Mini Loaf Pan. Bake, uncovered at 350
degrees for 1 hour. Cool and place loaves into freezer bags. Squeeze air out of bags and freeze.
Defrost in refrigerator for 24 hours and heat, covered, for 20 minutes. Serve with potatoes.
Taco Ring (cook meat, freeze, reheat)
1 lb. fresh, lean ground beef
1 packet taco seasoning mix
1 c. grated cheddar cheese
2 pkgs (8 oz. each) refrigerated crescent rolls
1 medium red or green bell pepper
shredded lettuce
coarsely chopped tomato
sm. purple onion (optional)
4 oz. can sliced black olives
salsa
sour cream
Using 8” Saute Pan, prepare taco meat according to package directions and divide in half.
Freeze one-half meat and label “Taco Meat,” and use for tacos or nachos when only a small serving is needed. Freeze other half of meat and label “Taco Ring.” When ready to create Taco Ring, defrost meat and mix with cheese. Unroll crescent rolls and
separate into 16 triangles. Place triangles in a circle on 15” Round Stone with wide ends
overlapping in center and points toward the outside. (There should be a 5” diameter opening in the center of the stone.) Scoop meat mixture evenly onto widest end of triangle.
Fold points of triangles over filling and tuck under wide ends of dough in the center. (Filling will
not be completely covered.) Bake at 350 degrees for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown.
Using V-Shaped Cutter, place decorative cut red or green pepper in center of the ring and fill
with salsa. Mound lettuce, tomatoes, onion, and olives around pepper. Use Easy Accent
Decorator to garnish with sour cream.
62
Chicken Tetrazzini (cook, freeze, reheat)
16 oz. spaghetti
½ stick butter
1 onion, chopped
1 c. green bell pepper, chopped
3 c. cooked chicken, cubed
8 oz. fresh mushrooms, sliced
2 c. grated Monterey Jack cheese
2 cans Golden Cream-of-Mushroom soup
3 c. milk
salt and pepper to taste
Break spaghetti in half and cook as directed on package; drain. Using 8” Saute Pan, cook onion and bell pepper in butter for 5 minutes; toss with spaghetti and remaining ingredients in a large
bowl. Place mixture into two freezer bags; squeeze air out of bags and freeze. Defrost and bake
in Stoneware Deep Dish Baker, covered, at 350 degrees for 45 minutes until bubbly.
Additional Resources for Make-Ahead Meals and Meal Planning
Thriving Home Mom’s Healthy Freezer Meals with 60+ Meals Online
http://thrivinghomeblog.com/healthy-recipes-index/healthy-freezer-meals-recipes/
Money Saving Mom’s Freezer Cooking Planners
http://moneysavingmom.com/downloads/freezer-cooking-planners
My Joy Filled Life’s Post-Partum Freezer Meals
http://www.myjoyfilledlife.com/2012/12/post-partum-freezer-meals-preparing-for.html
63
Packing for the Hospital
This list is to help you prepare when packing for the hospital. You’ll want to take the things you need, but don’t over pack – you’ll have to transport everything you take with you and you don’t want to have too many things because you’ll also be bringing home baby. Carry in the Car
{I recommend you get these things into your vehicle at 28 weeks}
~Garbage bags to protect seats and store wet things should your water break
~Towel(s)
~Change of clothes/shoes/socks
~Extra underwear
~Feminine products to absorb leakage
~Water bottles – once admitted, you may not be permitted to drink any water
~Infant Car Seat
Pack in Bags
~Insurance cards, ID and Birth Plan (if you have one)
~Change of clothes w/comfy shoes and pajamas (for you and your husband)
~Maternity bra(s) and extra disposable underwear and socks
~Something to pull your hair up with – ponytail holder or headband
~Toiletries – toothbrush, hairbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, chap stick for chapped lips,
shampoo and conditioner, lotion, nipple cream, face wash, and makeup (optional)
~Glasses/and or contacts w/storage cases & solution – glasses may be too cumbersome during
L&D
~Cheap throwaway flip flops for showering
64
~Sanitary products to absorb fluids
~Snacks and water bottles – change for vending machines
~Camera/video recorder with extra memory and chargers
~Cell phone & charger with a list of phone numbers for people to call once baby arrives
~Reading materials (ex. A book on newborn care) in the event L&D takes awhile
Pack in bags (optional)
~Extra pillows (you may want to put these inside kitchen trash bags to protect them)
~Cozy bath towel and/or bath robe & slippers
~Breast Pump – if you prefer to use your own (check to see if hospital provides)
~Music for relaxation during L&D or after
~Two tennis balls in a sock for massage, candles for aromatherapy, or other oils/lotions for
massage during L&D or after
Pack for BABY
~An approved “infant” car seat – your hospital may need to approve the car seat before you
can take baby home
~Bring your Baby Book for footprints and any other mementos if you plan to have baby’s feet stamped at the hospital
~Baby emery board or nail clippers to trim nails
~Appropriate going-home attire based on the weather conditions at time of delivery – can
include things like onesies, pants, socks, hats, baby mittens, sweaters, etc. Bring two or three
changes of clothes, most babies spit up and poop quite a bit.
~Most hospitals provide diapers – you may want to ask before you bring any.
~Warm blankets for travel to/from home.
65
Creating a Birth Plan
My husband and I wrote a birth plan before the delivery of our baby so that we could
communicate to the medical staff our wishes as to how we wanted to birth our baby. Make
sure to send a to the hospital ahead-of-time so they can keep it on file. I also advise that you
take a hard copy with you in case there is a mix-up with your paperwork.
I’ve included an example here of a birth plan to help you start to formulate your own. This is just an example of the kinds of things you may want to write in your birth plan. Take some time
before baby arrives to research birth plans and see what works for you. Just know that if
anything happens during labor and delivery that endangers you or your baby, your birth plan
wishes will be secondary to the health and safety of you and your baby. I wrote birth plans for
both my boys and in both cases the actual labor and delivery did not match the plan.
Sample Birth Plan Template
Name:
Husband:
Additional Support Persons: (doula)
Due Date:
Physician:
Our Important Issues, Fears, Concerns about the Birth Experience
We are absolutely thrilled to be at (name of facility where you are planning to go for delivery)
for the birth of our child, baby (family last name-unless you know the name you will give your
baby). We have been preparing for months via birthing courses for a healthy and low risk
pregnancy to be followed by a natural childbirth and would appreciate all of the kind,
encouraging care that you can provide. (or write here how you’ve prepared)
As a part of the birth experience, we hope to work together as a husband and wife team to
birth our baby with the help of (our doula, mid-wife, or helper– give name(s) here and (name of
whom ever else you want there). We feel strongly that we (birth-mother and father) remain
together during labor and that our baby be available to be held immediately after birth for
breastfeeding and bonding.
With your help, we may use the following comfort measures during labor:
(be sure to write if you plan to use an epidural or other pain medication; if not, these are
alternatives to a medicated birth)
Playing soft relaxing music
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Relaxation/breathing techniques
Use of the Jacuzzi tub
Walking
Changing positions
Shower
Massage
Birthing bar or stool
Heat/cold (ice chips and wash cloths)
We are hoping to avoid needing any medication in labor unless an emergency arises (delete this
sentence or rewrite it if you plan to use medication).
We hope to be provided ample time to labor and have as much privacy as possible during this
event. We’d like to ensure freedom of movement as much as possible.
We prefer not to have either induction or the bag of waters broken via superficial means as it
acts as a cushion for the baby’s head upon delivery (delete if this does not apply for you).
The mother would like to avoid an episiotomy and would prefer massage to stretch for birth.
For pushing, the mother may need assistance from her husband and doula and may want to
change position – to all fours, on her side, using a birthing bar, or leaning back (at a 45 degree
angle).
The most important thing is a healthy mom and a healthy baby, so we do appreciate your
expertise and we are depending upon your team to inform us if any problems arise so that we
may discuss our alternatives and come up with a new plan of action. We will, of course, be
flexible on all the points listed above should a complication arise – we take our responsibility of
being good parents very seriously and want to do what is best for the mom and our baby.
If a cesarean delivery is necessary, our special concerns/needs would be that the method for
surgery used would provide the best opportunity for a VBAC for our future children and be
made with care to ensure the quickest healing possible.
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After Delivery
Following birth, the family requests a period of three to four minutes prior to clamping and
cutting of the umbilical cord to ensure as much cord blood as possible makes it into the baby’s circulation. Also, if possible, Daddy would like to cut the cord. (delete if this does not apply for
you)
It would be helpful to us if the baby’s vitals are checked while in skin-to-skin contact with the
mother. In addition, should the baby need to leave the room, Daddy will accompany him.
We’d also like to keep the baby with us as much as possible, so rooming in is perfectly fine with
us.
Educational Needs
Before we go home we need information or practice with: breastfeeding, swaddling, positions
for sleeping, and caring for the umbilical cord. Also any tips on what to do if the baby
continually cries or can’t sleep would be helpful.
Our NEWBORN
We would like: pictures, footprints in baby book, foot and handprints to give as gifts to
grandparents
We plan to: Breastfeed (or Bottle feed)
Thank you for your kind attention. We look forward to sharing this, our little miracle, with the
very special people on your staff.
Sincerely,
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Childcare Arrangements
I highly recommend you check with other parents that you know when selecting childcare for
your children. Ask for referrals and meet and interview and potential child care provider before
hiring them.
I also recommend a “trial” visit where the provider spends some time with your child while you
are home so you can see how your child interacts with this person and how this person
responds to your child. You can also be available to answer questions while the provider is
performing the “trial” visit. I’ve included a babysitter checklist that you can use for whoever you have watch your child or
children during L&D should this not be your first child. After delivery this checklist can be used
once you are comfortable with leaving your little one under the care of a trusted childcare
provider.
I also have a section for “after” the delivery of your baby where I will talk more about selecting
child-care.
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Babysitter Checklist
Home Address:
Home Phone #:
Mom’s Cell:
Dad’s Cell:
Emergency: 911
Poison Control #:
Our Location & #:
Return Time:
Friend/Relative:
Phone #:
Home Security:
Instructions for
computer:
Extra Info.
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Child 1
Child 2
Child 3
Child(ren)’s Name(s):
Age(s):
Allergies:
Favorite
Activities:
Favorite Books:
Favorite Drink:
Favorite Foods:
Time
Breakfast
for:
Meals (eat?)
Time for: Lunch
Meals (eat?)
Time(s)
Snack
for:
Snacks (eat?)
Nap/sleep
TV Time
Amount of TV OK
Approved DVDs
Approved Games
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Child 1
Bedtime
at:
Child 2
Child 3
starts
Give Bath
Potty or change
diaper
Wash hands
Brush Teeth
Bedtime drink or
snack
Read books
Goodnight Ritual
Lights Out
Excuses and
responses
Tips on discipline
Thermometer
location
Band-aides
Tylenol OK?
Amount
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Selecting a Pediatrician
With our firstborn son being a NICU baby, we had the privilege of being able to ask the doctors
and nurses for a recommendation in regards to selecting a pediatrician. The staff at a NICU will
have exposure to numerous pediatricians and can usually make an excellent recommendation.
We love our pediatrician. She has an excellent bedside manner with our boys. She’s attentive and professional. She makes the examinations fun and she explains everything clearly to us.
She takes her time answering our questions and never makes us feel dumb for asking any
question.
In addition, the staff on her team is courteous and helpful. Their team includes a lactation
specialist and physician’s assistants who are equally attentive with our children. Our
pediatrician’s office has a 24/7 call for help line with nurses manning the phones all night and
after hours. If my son gets sick at 10 PM, I have a source I can call for help. Their service has
saved me from having to run to the emergency room in the middle of the night.
A good pediatrician can sometimes be hard to find. Again, use word of mouth. Ask other
parents who they use and if they would recommend their pediatrician. Here are a few
questions to help you get acquainted with the services your pediatrician provides that will help
you determine if he/she is right for your family.
Questions to Consider When Selecting a Pediatrician
~How many years of experience does your doctor have in working with children?
~If needed, does your doctor have any experience in working with children who have special
needs? (example: premature)
~Watch your pediatrician interact with your child and other children. Does he/she make the
child feel comfortable?
~Does your pediatrician listen to your cares and concerns?
~Does the pediatrician ask pertinent questions? Do they help you as a parent uncover what
certain symptoms may be indicating?
~Do they treat you and your child with respect?
~What are your pediatrician’s hours and will they work with your schedule?
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~What after hours support is available?
~Is there a call line where you can get help when the doctor is not available?
~What is your pediatrician’s take on immunizations? Do they support your decision as a parent concerning immunizations for your child?
~How frequent are “well-baby” checkups and what is the co-pay?
~Do all the doctors within the practice tend to handle things in the same way? If not, what are
the differences and are you ok with those differences?
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Technology Aides
New Technologies for Tracking Pregnancy
We live in exciting times. There are so many options for tracking your pregnancy. This is a short
list. Search on Google and you’re sure to find an application that suits your style. Due to the ever-changing availability of apps, it’s challenging to include all of the available apps currently
online. An online search will produce the most current results. I selected these apps because
they are from reputable and established sources.
My Pregnancy Today Android App (text & images taken from the linked application)
Simply enter your baby’s due date and My Pregnancy Today turns your Android into an expert guide for your exact day of pregnancy. Feel more prepared for your baby’s birth, and get the answers you need, whenever you need them.
Link: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.babycenter.pregnancytracker&hl=en
My Pregnancy Today features:
~Your pregnancy day by day: Learn how your body’s changing, what’s ahead, and how to cope
~Fetal development images: See what your baby looks like each week
~Pregnancy checklist: Reminders to keep you on track with decisions, appointments, and more
~Award-winning videos: Watch your baby grow in the womb, and witness moms giving birth
~Birth clubs: Connect with other women due at the same time
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~Due date calculator: Quickly find your due date
~Nutrition guide: Manage your weight gain with tips and recipes to help you eat well
~Track your progress: Countdown to your big day with weekly notifications
What to Expect Pregnancy Tracker
Read the book? Use the site? Now you can download the app -- for FREE -- from Heidi Murkoff's
What to Expect When You're Expecting, America's pregnancy bible.
* Week-by-week details and illustrations on your body and baby
* Slideshow of your belly pictures
* Read and post to our pregnancy & parenting community
Link:
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.wte.view&feature=search_result#?t=W251
bGwsMSwxLDEsImNvbS53dGUudmlldyJd
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For your iPhone I’ve attached a link here to Babble.com’s article:
A few other sources for Apple Products:
iPad Apps Gone Free
Link: http://www.iosnoops.com/iphone-ipad-apps-gone-free/
iTunes Baby Bump
Link: file://localhost/%E2%80%A2%09https/::itunes.apple.com:us:app:babybump-pregnancyfree:id389089619%3Fmt=8
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Baby Name Planner
Using Technology for Baby Name Planning
One of the most exciting things about a new baby is naming the baby. Names can come from
many sources: family names, combining names, or researching names to find out what names
are the most common and/or popular and their meanings. Baby Center has a wonderful
resource for looking up baby names. You can visit their web site at:
http://www.babycenter.com/baby-names. The social security administration also tracks baby
names, view online at: http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/. This checklist will help you
track your baby name ideas. You may want to create two lists – one if it’s a boy, and another if
it’s a girl. Have fun choosing your baby’s new name.
Baby First
Name
Meaning/Significance
Rank
Baby
Middle
Name
Meaning/Significance
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Rank
Section 2:
After Baby is Born
As I mentioned earlier, with my second son, bringing him home and adapting to life with him
has been much easier then the transition with my first baby. Because I was better prepared,
the transition was much smoother and I want to share these helpful tips and tools with you.
Ask for What You Need
It seems simple but for some of us it isn’t really. As a little girl I was so afraid of rocking the boat that I grew up learning to walk on eggshells and put a smiley-face on everything so that nothing
was a bother or problem. This led to me hiding my own feelings from even myself. I learned to
be so disconnected that often I’ll know that something bothers me but I can’t put my finger on it. I can’t describe what it is that hurts me even if you ask sincerely about it. It took years of counseling just to get this one point through my head – I have to learn to ask
for what I need. For me, I actually have to take some time to clear my thoughts and really think
about it before I even know what it is I need so I can ask for it.
I want you to know that as an expectant mother, or as a mom of little ones, it’s important to learn to ask for what you need.
Some people do not have this issue. If you are the opposite, you may just need to focus on how
you ask, and if you are striking the right balance in your family.
Either way, being aware of what we need and being able to communicate that in a courteous
and respectful way to those around us is an important part of getting to a place of peace in
our new mommy-hood. If you’re not sure where to start pray and ask God to lead and guide
you. Confide in a close mentor or friend for help. At times I’ve even journaled to help me get my head wrapped around what I needed so I could be certain about what it was I was asking for
and why.
No matter what you do, identify what it is that you need. Is it rest, encouragement, practical
help? Do you have questions about how to care for your baby medically or practically? List your
needs in one column and your resources in another column.
If you make these lists and find your resources column short, consider finding a local church
where you can get help. Go online and see if your local hospital is offering support groups or
new parenting classes. Online is also a great resource for all types of parenting advice and even
as a way to meet others who are going through what you are going through.
I’ve found tremendous resources through my church and other local churches. With my second
pregnancy I started getting together with a small group of mothers with young children. We
met twice a month at my house to discuss “Mission of Motherhood” – a wonderful book
written by Sally Clarkson on the topic of motherhood.
This group of moms offered me tremendous support near the tail end of my pregnancy with
my second baby. They helped watch my eldest son, provided rides to/from the hospital,
brought my family meals, and prayed for and encouraged us through pregnancy and delivery.
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Another source of valuable encouragement has been my local Mothers of Preschoolers
(MOPS) group. These women have been extremely valuable in offering support and
encouragement to me as a mom. We meet twice a month and for three hours at a time we
enroll our little ones in child care at the church and spend time discussing ways to be better
moms, improve our parenting skills, and build up our marriages.
No matter where you are at in your list of needs or resources, there is always someone out
there could use advice or help from you as well. If you need to draw on outside sources for
help, its smart to invest time in being a support to others. Plug in with your church community
or a local MOPS group. If none exist in your area, try plugging in online.
Online sources can’t help as easily from a practical perspective, but they can offer ideas and encouragement. I’ve listed some of my favorite resources within these pages to help you.
Mothers of Preschoolers - provides a support group for moms from inception to school age.
These are real-life moms just like you who aim to become better moms through training and
fellowship. Check this website to find a group near you: http://www.mops.org
Baby Center is a great source for info from how to soothe a baby to taming preschooler
tantrums http://www.babycenter.com. I registered my two boys and I receive e-mail updates
on where they should be at developmentally. This helps me gauge their progress.
Another great source for baby info from the “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” authors.
Their link is: http://www.whattoexpect.com/what-to-expect/landing-page.aspx
Family Life has some resources for Marriage and Parenting that you may want to check out.
You can find their online articles at: http://www.familylife.com
Focus on the Family also publishes articles online for new parents. You can find helpful
information here: http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/
The key is to reach out and make an effort to ask for what you need.
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Round Up the Troops
You will need support when baby arrives.
One of the things that I did a much better job at with my second child was to coordinate with
family about what could be done to help my husband and I after baby number two arrived.
I realize that not everyone has the ability to get a ton of support from family and friends, but
communicating ahead of time can go a long way in helping others understand how they can
support you and your new little one.
My first line of support in having babies comes from my husband. With our second son, I had a
toddler at home and my ability to lift and carry him was declining as my pregnant belly grew
bigger. I had to ask my husband months before baby arrived to help more with child care at
home.
There are ways to make the transition from total care being provided by mom to care being
provided by both mom and dad with older children smoother.
Transition Helpers
Establish a routine. By having a regular bedtime ritual – a certain time for bed, get dressed for
bed, bath, brush teeth, read some books, drink milk, pray and get into crib – my toddler already
knew the drill when daddy stepped in and took over at bedtime.
Even if you can’t get help, establishing a routine not only helps an older child, it also helps a
baby know what to expect next. Having a routine makes children feel more secure. This makes
them calmer and more cooperative.
If this will be your first baby, talk to your husband about how he can help you. Again, routine is
key. Most babies need to nurse or drink formula once every two to three hours. If your partner
can feed the baby via bottle even just one time per night, you can get almost five hours of
sleep. Without that bottle feeding you may only get two hours of sleep. Think through and plan
what your family’s routine will look like. Our family recommends “Baby Wise”. Even if you aren’t a stringent follower of the routine outlined in the book, the routine suggested there will help you get started.
The key tenants in any routine include (read “Baby Wise” for more details and troubleshooting):
~A specific start time every day
~A specific bed time every day
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~Scheduled naps (I did not worry about scheduled naps the first 3 months)
~Scheduled feedings
A rhythm of:
Day – wake, eat, play, sleep
Night – wake, eat, sleep
~Change diaper as soon as baby wakes and double check before putting down to sleep.
~To start, a baby will go through one cycle of wake, eat, play, and sleep every two to three
hours.
Your second lifeline after baby arrives will more than likely come from extended family. My
husband and I coordinated with my mother and she spent six weeks with us after my second
son was born. She’s retired which is how she was able to do this for us. My mom and I are so
close that I felt as if I had cloned myself and had an extra “me” walking around, helping out. It was a huge blessing.
Other expectant moms I know have a grandmother or aunt that can do this for them. Don’t be afraid to ask, when you’ve only had two hours of sleep you’ll be glad for the extra help. Other
options may include a close girlfriend or neighbor. You may also have the resources to hire
some help. Even a “babysitter” can be a huge blessing if they can just hold the baby so you can
get some sleep.
To help family or friends know how they can better help you, try to get organized before baby
arrives. I had stocked up on frozen lasagnas and entrees. I also stocked up on the ingredients of
some of our family’s favorite meals. I had a recipe binder with our family’s favorite dinners printed out and stored in a convenient place in our kitchen. In addition, a friend from my husband’s work had taken on the coordination of organizing people to bring us meals.
If you’re new to your town, make ahead freezer meals or premade meals will be of great help
to you. After labor and delivery, standing up to make a meal in the kitchen may not be as easy
for you as it was before baby. I’ve included a list of resources in this book in the chapter on
“Freezer Meals”. The chapter includes several recipes and online sources to find great freeze ahead recipes.
I stocked up on laundry detergent and cleaning supplies just to make sure I would not to need
to run out for anything. And I had loads of diapers and wipes ready for baby. For myself I had all
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the feminine products I would need as well as Tylenol to help ease some of the aches that come
with postpartum recovery.
Outside of close family and friends, don’t be afraid to contact your local church. Most churches
have a branch of “pastoral care” that cares for needs in the community. We received knitted blankets and booties from volunteers via local churches. Pray and ask God
to guide you to resources that can help you and line them up before baby arrives.
Don’t forget “word of mouth”. Talk to other moms you know and ask them where they
received help within your community. You may be surprised to learn about additional resources
in your area.
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Lower Your Expectations
Everyone has expectations about having a baby.
I think one of the hardest things I had to adjust to was just how much a baby slows you down.
Before I had my first son, I would make a list of twenty things to do in one day, and I would
usually finish at least a dozen. After baby arrived, I might make a list of four or five things and
on a good day I would complete two!
My husband says it’s like moving in molasses and I think he’s right.
Don’t be discouraged. Remember, you are taking care of yourself and the needs of a completely
dependent, utterly adorable, human being. Sure that little baby is awfully cute but he/she can’t eat, sleep, or poop without your help. So your “to-do” list is not completely unimportant, but you have to let go of the expectation that anything on it will get done on a particular day. You
can’t control baby. Baby may be fussy, unable to sleep, get sick, go through a growth spurt, or any number of things that might make it necessary for you to stay home and focus on caring for
baby.
If something absolutely has to get done you may want to delegate it to someone else who is
dependable, in case your day gets overrun by the needs of your baby.
Babies are little people who communicate their needs mainly by crying. What you used to be
able to do is no longer simple because now you have a cute little person who needs you for
everything. It’s ok. Let go of your “to do” list and the expectations you have with it. Other Unrealistic Expectations You May Have
~You’ll get up and get ready every day
~You’ll do all the old stuff you used to do
~You’ll stay connected with all the people you used to talk to
~You’ll participate in hobbies you love
~Your marriage will stay the same
When my first-born son came home, I had him all to myself. My husband had to complete his
workweek before he could stay home with us. Since we had a preemie on oxygen with reflux I
just couldn’t take my eyes or ears off our baby. I don’t remember if I even brushed my teeth or my hair those first three days.
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Mommy-hood sometimes means you stay at home in your pajamas all day and focus on caring
for your little ones. I don’t think you should make this a long-term habit, but certainly for the
first three months of your little one’s life you need to cut yourself a break. If you’re sleeping
when the baby sleeps, your pajamas are the best things to have on because you’ll just be in and out of bed throughout the day.
You will not be able to do all the old stuff you used to do. Simply put, you won’t have the time. Babies are very time consuming. They want to be held, nursed, comforted, and talked to.
Rejoice in this time and bond with your baby. The other stuff can wait.
Here is where your resources come in – delegate as much as you can. Get help with laundry,
grocery shopping, cleaning, etc. from your list of resources as much as possible. I even had a
few girlfriends I could call upon to pick up things for me at the store while they were already
there for their own family. I paid them for the items when they brought them to me. Just
having them pick up those few things was a lifesaver for me.
I also don’t think I looked at a single piece of mail the first six months after our son was born, my husband took care of it. Delegate your chores and responsibilities to others if possible so
you can focus on caring for baby.
It is highly unlikely that you will stay connected with all the people you used to talk to. Try to let
people know ahead of time that you anticipate being in a mommy-cocoon for a while. A
sleeping baby in the house makes a phone ringing-off-the-hook undesirable.
If you let your friends and/or co-workers know that you expect to be out of touch ahead of
time it makes the transition easier and your unavailability less offensive to them. I have found
e-mail works great for keeping in touch. I sent out a few pictures with a paragraph or two
announcing our baby and I managed to keep in touch with friends without tying myself up on
the phone.
My husband and I both acknowledge that many, and almost all, of our hobbies have been put
on the back burner. With a one-year-old and a nearly three-year-old in the house, all our free
time is spent with them. These little years are fleeting and we want to treasure our time with
our boys. You will want to do the same with your little one(s). So many moms have told me to
treasure this time with young-ones.
My three-year-old asks if we can do “tickle-family time” almost every evening. I can’t think of a single hobby that holds a candle to that. Do take time to capture these precious moments with
pictures or video. My husband and I still marvel at videos of our three-year-old as a baby. He
was only three-and-a-half pounds. Miracle.
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Find Rest and Refreshment
What is it that makes you feel renewed? Is it journaling, reading, going for a walk or run,
connecting with a friend? Make time for that. Ask your spouse for help. It’s so important to remember to eat right, get exercise, and make time for rest.
Some Saturdays my husband watches the boys for an hour or two so I can take a nap. It
recharges my batteries and gives me that little extra rest I need to make it through another
week.
If you need to, hire a babysitter to be at the house during naptime so you can get out – even if
it’s just for an hour or so – you’ll feel more like your old self and this will help recharge your
batteries.
For me there is a wellspring that never runs dry. It’s God’s word. When I run out of energy, hope, connection, sleep, God’s word never runs out for me. I read the Bible and participate in women’s Bible studies so I can feel renewed. A great source for connecting with women online
to participate in a Bible study is Good Morning Girls at http://www.goodmorninggirls.org. If
you want to fellowship with others but can’t leave your home this may be a viable option for
you.
There are some wonderful devotionals out there for moms. One of my wise mentor mamas
gave me some excellent advice. Keep a Bible or devotional everywhere. Have one in your car,
diaper bag, kitchen, and bathroom. When you’re waiting at the doctor’s office for your child’s checkup you can read a devotional with some scripture to inspire and encourage you.
Some of my favorite devotionals:
The Bible Promise Book for Women, by Barbour Publishing
Jesus Calling, Enjoying Peace in His Presence, by Sarah Young, published by Thomas Nelson
A Daily Women’s Devotional by Donna Gaines, published by NAVPress
For online devotionals, what I have found really helpful is BibleGateway.com– they have
devotionals for motherhood, marriage, and reading the Bible in a year. And it’s FREE. I’ve signed up for several and I LOVE that the scripture verses come straight to my inbox daily. This way I
can be in God’s word every day and find refreshment for my soul when I need it.
Of course, attending a women’s Bible study group that has child care is ideal. Ask around and
see if a church in your area sponsors Bible study groups for women and offers child-care. If you
can’t find a group, you may want to consider hosting one. I host a small group for first time
moms that meet twice a month in my home. This group of women has been a tremendous
blessing for me.
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Invest your time in a group of women and cultivate friendships will help you build up the
resources you need to help you get through the ups and downs of motherhood. This is
especially true if you live far way from family or do not already have a support system in place.
Mommy-hood is much easier if you can get the rest and refreshment you need via whatever
activity fills your love tank. Don’t neglect the time you need for renewal. Talk to your family and support system around you to make sure you get the R&R you need.
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Child Care After Baby is Born
Not every mama can or will stay home with her baby. And even if you do, you still need a break
every now and then to go on a date with your husband, or get some alone time to do
something you enjoy.
It may be daunting to think of it now, but you will need to consider childcare at some point.
There is no better source than word of mouth. Talk to other parents you know and find out
who/what they are using for child-care in your community.
I have found good sources for babysitters through our local church. Using this venue, I’m able to not only find out about the sitter, but I can ask about her family and meet and talk with other
families who have used her services.
There are drop-in day cares available in most well-sizes cities. I’ve heard from other moms that these are safe and convenient. Again, use word of mouth here. Some gym memberships also
provide child-care for an additional fee.
As a parent you need to weigh taking your children to a drop-in care facility vs. a babysitter. I
personally like the relationship that is built between my children and a sitter. Another
advantage is that my children get to remain in their own environment with a sitter.
You have to make the decision that works best for your family. Whatever you do, start
researching it in advance of your need, that way it won’t be a mad scramble to find someone
or a drop-in care facility if there is an emergency. If you have to make a hasty decision about
child-care you may be forced to use sub-standard care, which isn’t fun for anyone. For moms having to return to work, the same idea applies for daycare. Ask other working moms
who they use and how their kids like the services. Make a list of what you’re looking for in daycare services.
Starter Questions in Selecting Day Care or Other Child Care
~Do you offer extended or weekend hours?
~What are the charges/fees if you’re late picking up your child(ren)? ~How do they handle emergencies?
~Is their staff trained in CPR and other emergency care?
~Do they transport children? Are their drivers certified?
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~Are the day-care workers screened with a background check and are they required to provide
references?
~What kinds of activities do they do?
~Are children allowed to play outside and under what conditions?
~What about potty-training? Diapering?
~Snacks? Do you as a parent need to send your child with ready-made food or is it provided?
~How is discipline handled?
~What happens if another child misbehaves and hurts your child?
~Is there a naptime, how is that administered?
~What kind of songs/rhymes do they sing and or/ videos/shows do they watch?
~Are manners encouraged?
~Will there be any character training?
~What kinds of toys are available?
~How are children encouraged to interact socially?
Some of these questions make great questions for sitters, too. I like to hire sitters with CPR
training.
Baby Activity Tracker
If you find yourself needing to leave your baby with a child-care provider, I’ve attached a Baby Activity Tracker to help you know what happened while your baby is under a child-taker’s care. This tracker can also be very helpful for a mom who desires to establish a routine. I have also
found it helpful when my children were just infants. If one of my babies fell ill, my doctor would
always ask me about my baby’s eating, diapering, sleeping and activity patterns. If you keep a
checklist of your baby’s activities like the one I’ve attached here you’ll be able to answer the pediatrician’s questions easily. 91
Name
Date
AM or PM
Weekday
(circle one)
Time
Awake or
sleeping?
Diaper
change
Activity/
Play?
What
he/she ate
& drank?
Behavior
& mood?
Temp. (if
needed)
Wet/Soiled?
6:00
6:30
7:00
7:30
8:00
8:30
9:00
9:30
10:00
10:30
11:00
11:30
12:00
12:30
1:00
1:30
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Name
Date
AM or PM
Weekday
(circle one)
Time
Awake or
sleeping?
Diaper
change
Activity/
Play?
What
he/she ate
& drank?
Behavior
& mood?
Temp. (if
needed)
Wet/Soiled?
2:00
2:30
3:00
3:30
4:00
4:30
5:00
5:30
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Read to Help You Transition
I don’t think that any one book is the answer to all our questions about parenting. I’m going to share with you the books that I’ve turned to time and again as I’ve journeyed down this road of motherhood.
Best Books for Pregnancy Readiness
Your Pregnancy Week by Week by Dr. Glade B. Curtis & Judith Schuler
What to expect when you are expecting by Heidi Murkogg, Arlene Eisenberg, and Sandee
Hathaway
Eating for Pregnancy: The Essential Nutrition Guide and Cookbook for Today's Mothers-to-Be ,
by Catherine Jones
Best Books for Establishing Routine/Understanding Baby
The Preemie Parent’s Companion Guide by Susan Madden, M.S.
On Becoming Baby Wise by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam
Baby Minds, Brain-Building Games Your Baby Will Love by Linda Acredolo and Susan Goodwyn
The 2,000 Best Games & Activities {for baby through age 8} by Susan Ketttman
Great Books on Parenting/Discipline
The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson
Parenting is Heart Work by Dr. Scott Turansky
Positive Discipline for Preschoolers by Jane Nelsen and Cheryl Erwin
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Communicate in Your Marriage
No doubt about it, children change a marriage. My husband and I just keep reminding each
other that this is only a “season”. When you have little ones they are so dependant it places tremendous demands on you. This can eat up energy and make you less available to talk with
and spend time with your husband. Communication is key.
Make sure you’re talking with your husband about what is going on with baby and how he can
help. If you’ve got doctor’s appointments make sure to keep him in on any new developments for you or baby. Make it a point to talk with your husband about things outside of baby and
make him feel like a priority too. And again, ask for what you need.
Sometimes a little affection and attention from our husband can help fill our love tank so we
can be refreshed to continue our support of baby. Vice versa- he might need a little extra TLC
from you too.
A blogger who is totally committed to helping women have better marriages is Darlene Sachet
from Time Warp Wife. Check out her blog for tips on how to connect with your husband and
keep those home fires burning. Her blog address is: http://time-warp-wife.blogspot.com
Having a baby takes a great deal of energy strength and stamina. Caring for baby’s every need can be exhausting, especially in the early months. Try to communicate with your spouse
before baby arrives to help set expectations that baby’s arrival will impact your relationship. Talk about the need for grace and that this is only a season. But also brainstorm ways to stay
connected.
If you haven’t heard of the book “The Five Love Languages” you should take a look at it. I learned that my husband’s most important love languages are quality time, touch and words of
affirmation. My top love languages are quality time, acts of service, and touch. The fifth love
language is gifts.
When baby arrives your sleep schedule will be greatly impacted as well as your energy level.
Due to our varying bed times, my husband and I often felt like two ships passing in the night. In
just trying to communicate, I would leave notes for him to find in the morning before work.
They would say things like “lunch in fridge – love you” or something similar.
He made a comment about how much those notes meant to him and I remembered that words
of affirmation are one of his love languages. I bought a small book of sweet note cards and
started randomly leaving them out for him. I also bought a small chalkboard that sits by the
coffee machine. I leave encouraging notes for him on a regular basis and I’ve been amazed at how this small thing has improved our relationship.
I have two children under age three so I can relate to a mama who feels drained. But don’t give up. Put forth that little extra effort, in the form of your husband’s favorite love language, and 95
watch your relationship improve. Don’t expect anything back. This is about loving your husband on purpose.
I also recommend praying for your husband. Pray for his energy, leadership, strength and walk
with God. You will want to pray for your little one(s) but don’t forget to pray for the one you married. In this season of an infant and toddler, I needed a gentle reminder every once in
awhile to love my husband. Don’t be discouraged, God will give us the strength we need to
love even when we feel spent.
As I wrote earlier, you also have to ask for what you need. If you think you could use a little TLC
from your husband make sure to talk with him. I made the mistake early on in my marriage
thinking my husband had ESP and could read my mind. He can’t. I have to let him know when I need to have my love tank filled back up.
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Sleep when Baby Sleeps
DO NOT try to keep up with housework or cooking especially during those early months.
A wise piece of advice is to “sleep when baby sleeps”. It is so tempting to do other things when baby is sleeping. There is always housework, laundry, and dinner to make… The list is never ending. Especially during the first three months of baby’s arrival, give yourself grace. Talk with your family about your energy level and discuss how to reduce work for you so that you can
sleep when baby sleeps.
Tips to Sleep when Baby Sleeps
~Use a sound machine or earplugs to help you sleep. I kept my babies in my room with me for
the first four months, so if they slept in their rock-n-play, I used the opportunity to nap in my
bed and used a sound machine or earplugs to help me sleep. It helped me to tune out little
grunts and fidgetiness. When my baby woke, I was right there at their first cry.
~Avoid caffeine and sugar. These may interfere with sleep. Since you will be off your normal
schedule, avoid liquids and foods that have a tendency to keep you awake.
~When my husband came home from work I would request he watch the baby for an hour or
two so I could take a nap. This was a great bonding time for dad and baby and gave mommy a
much-needed rest time.
~If my baby was restless I would pull the rock-n-play up next to my bed and place my hand on
my baby. It was a little uncomfortable for me but my baby would often fall back asleep. This
would buy me a bit more time to rest.
~Due to SIDS and other risks, many pediatricians and other child-care professionals do not
recommend co-sleeping with a baby. Do not pursue this as an option without talking with your
pediatrician first. Understand the risks associated with co-sleeping.
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Breastfeeding Tips
My first experience with breastfeeding was somewhat discouraging. I brought home a little
preemie with a weak suck. Despite attending two months of breastfeeding classes at my local
hospital, my son’s intake of milk was decreasing instead of increasing.
If this happens to you, pumping milk is one way to get breast milk for your baby. You may also
choose to go with formula. With my firstborn son, I used a combination of both.
One of the reassuring things about attending a support group at my local hospital was that I
realized I was not the only mom that was having real difficulty nursing my baby. There were at
least twenty or thirty other moms in that room every week. Nursing can be challenging for
anyone.
I read an article once that talked about the challenges of being a breastfeeding mom of
multiples. What I walked away with from reading the article is this – any amount of breast milk
is more beneficial than none at all. So don’t be discouraged if you can’t nurse your baby for very long or if you can’t rely only on nursing to nourish him or her. What your baby values most is closeness with caretakers. Being held, touched, talked to and
cared for are just as important as nursing.
If you want to make nursing a part of your lifestyle and are facing some challenges, La Leche
League is a great source of info for nursing mothers. If your hospital doesn’t offer a support group, La Leche League may be something to look into.
With my second baby, nursing was much easier because he naturally had a strong suck.
Breastfeeding in the early weeks can be painful as your body adjusts to the close contact of a
sensitive area, your nipples, to the hungry little mouth of your baby. The first few days of
nursing will also impact your uterus. Nursing causes the uterus to contract making cramping a
bit painful for most moms. For me the cramping stopped after ten days.
Both of my boys were slow nursers in the beginning taking as long as 45 minutes per feeding to
nurse. My strong nurser, my second son, was able to finish nursing in less than eight minutes at
the age of six months. Babies often get more efficient as they get older.
There are many products to help you adjust to life as a nursing mom. I mentioned this product
earlier but I loved My Breast Friend nursing pillow. I also used Lansinoh nipple cream when
needed and used the Johnson and Johnson breast pads when needed. I also used a nursing
cover in public to make my nursing private.
Nursing is a great time for cuddling with baby and talking softly to him or her. Nursing helps
build the bond with your baby. Trust me when I say that the time passes all too quickly. One
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minute they are curled up on a nursing pillow and the next they are running all over the house
giggling. Cherish the time you spend feeding your baby whether it’s nursing or bottle-feeding.
Learn how to un-latch your baby’s mouth gently. You can insert your pinky finger between their lips and your breast to unlatch them.
Breastfeeding is a lifestyle choice. It may hinder your ability to be away from baby, but there
are many medical and health benefits to breast milk from mommy.
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Bottle-Feeding Tips
As I mentioned, my firstborn was a little preemie with a weak suck. Bottle-feeding provided the
majority of his nourishment. As I mentioned in the baby gear section, we liked the Dr. Brown’s bottles for our two baby boys.
A Few Bottle-feeding Tips
~Never microwave pumped milk – it changes the make-up of the milk making it less nutritious
for baby. It also leads to uneven heating, which can burn baby’s mouth. I highly recommend a bottle-warmer. See my list of recommended products for more info.
~If you’re using a powdered formula, you can dispense a premeasured amount of formula into a bottle for the dry portion. Use a separate bottle for the “wet” portion and fill that bottle with the amount of water needed. By doing this you don’t have to try and carry the entire formula can with you wherever you go.
~The key to bottle feeding is to not allow any air into the nipple. Less air into the nipple means
less air into baby.
~Burp your baby often. The NICU nurses explained that when I burped my baby I needed to
make his cheeks shake. Of course, you want to be gentle but you need to get the air out. I
alternated between patting his back and rubbing it. Oftentimes he would burp with a rub. You
can also pat lower, middle and upper back for a better chance of getting the burp up. No matter
what you do, pay attention to how baby is responding and try to adjust accordingly.
~Feed your baby on a routine. I wrote a bit about routine before. Try to establish a regular
rhythm for your baby’s metabolism by feeding him or her at the same hours every day.
~Keep track of how much your baby is eating/drinking. This will help you gauge if your baby is
feeing normal. You’ll also notice growth spurts and/or tummy illness. ~Tracking your baby’s patterns will also help you answer questions when you take your baby in for a check up or if your baby is sick. Pay attention to how much and how often your baby is
eating as well as his or her body temperature, bowel movements and sleep patterns.
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Get Baby to Sleep
The number one thing you can do to help your baby sleep is to establish a routine. Have a set
bedtime every evening that you use to put your baby down for the night. You have to help your
baby distinguish night from day. You can do this by teaching them to wake, eat and play (then
back to sleep) and that at night they are fed and put back to sleep.
Tips to Get Baby to Sleep
~Create a bedtime routine – think about what bedtime readiness activities you can do
consistently. Is it bath, milk, rock, soft music and sleep? Or does it also include singing some
soft lullabies? Whatever it is it needs to be something you can do consistently every night to
help baby sleep.
~We did not do bath every night. It’s work for mommy and baby really only needs a bath 2-3
times per week so we did not make it a part of our bedtime routine. Do whatever is right for
your family concerning bath nights.
~Things to check: diaper, temperature in the room, clothing, look to see if a string or hair is
tangled somewhere on baby, baby may be hungry, and baby may just want to be held.
~Try burping your baby. Trapped gas creates huge discomfort for babies. When in doubt, burp
your baby to see if there is any trapped gas.
~Simethecone – This is the product used in gas relief drops. It worked wonders for both of my
reflux -inflamed infant boys. I recommend using this if your little one has gas issues. Check with
your pediatrician first before using.
~Keep a suction bulb on hand at all times. If your baby has boogies or congestion this can help
him or her breathe and hopefully sleep.
~If you have a colicky or reflux plagued baby we recommend the Fisher Price Rock N Play – even
our son on oxygen was able to sleep in it.
~Soft music – This helps soothe babies to sleep.
~Fan or sound maker – White noise has been very helpful in getting our boys to sleep.
~Soother – This is something you hang in the crib that plays soft music. Both our boys love their
soothers.
~Sleep positioner – For my preemie son with reflux and on oxygen I used a breathable sleep
positioner. I only used this until I moved him into the Rock n Play.
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Get Organized
The two things you can do to get organized: make lists and make a place for important things.
Things to Do Within the First Few Days of Leaving the Hospital
~Contact your insurance company and let then know you have birthed a “dependent”
~Take your baby in to your pediatrician’s office for a check-up
~Make sure to schedule any follow-up medical appointments for baby – blood tests, etc.
~Apply for your Baby’s Birth Certificate
~Apply for your Baby’s Social Security Card
~Contact the newspaper if you decide to make a birth announcement
~If you wish to send out paper or electronic birth announcements send those out when you are
able
Keep a list in your purse, your car and on your fridge, as well as any electronic devices that
includes your baby’s pediatrician, eye doctor, and any labs. Make sure your spouse also has this
information.
For the Diaper Bag
Diapers
Desitin
Pacifier
Formula
Emergency contact info
Extra socks
Burp Cloths
Extra-large zip lock bags for dirty clothes
Nursing Cover
Wipes
Diaper disposal bags
Bottle
Any medications: gas-relief drops
Change of Clothes
Bibs
Portable Blanket
Small sip lock bags for smaller items
Small toy or rattle
Create a file at home for baby:
Immunization records
Medical records
Receipts
Scrapbook Mementos
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Breathe in the Moment
I read an interesting article, I don’t remember where now, else I’d give credit. It talked about how we can learn something really important from our children. Children live in the NOW
moment. They aren’t planning this week’s grocery list while they are with us. Nor are they
calculating rotating the laundry before starting dinner or any other myriad of activities while
you are talking with them. They are in the here and now.
As moms we wear many hats. We’re juggling caring for little ones, a household, ourselves, a
husband, and maybe even an outside job or volunteer activity.
These little ones change so quickly. One minute they rely on you for even a drop to drink and
the next minute they’re eating the PB&J they’ve made themselves. Take a look around you, inhale deep, and breath. Stop to savor the moments when your little
one smiles at you. Take a snapshot in your mind of that toothless smile or that gurgling coo. I
love to smell my babies just after a warm bath and just drink in all that cuteness.
It’s hard to imagine now, but one day your little one will be asking to borrow the car keys or
introduce you to the person they are engaged to. Breath. Drink deep and savor the sweetness
of the memorable moments. If all you do is spend time planning your next grocery trip or
errand, it may be all you’ll remember.
One of the most important things you can do together as a family is have regular meal times.
Statistics show that families who eat regularly together have children that are less likely to get
into drugs, drinking, and premarital sexual activity. Your meal times could mean eating dinner
together every evening. Or, if sports activities interfere, maybe you enjoy breakfast every
weekend day together.
Help your family stay connected by eating together regularly and you’ll create a bond that will help your teenager avoid some of the temptations that come from trying to “belong” to other groups.
Other Ways to Connect and Make the Most of the Time with Your Little Ones
~Go to church together
~Have a select group of families you fellowship with regularly
~Take walks or hikes together
~Go to the park or zoo
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~Visit the library
~Go to a museum
Invest. Your little ones have a memory too. Seize the opportunity to have an impact by creating
a special memory with mommy or daddy. What can you do to make their memories special
ones?
A friend of mine says that on the birth date of each of her little ones every month, that child
gets to stay up a half an hour later than normal and spend time with mom and dad doing
something he or she enjoys. No TV, no video games, just time spent talking, playing a game,
reading, or possibly making something in the kitchen. Their other children spend some quite
time reading in their rooms and everyone goes to bed at the same time.
Another idea is to do a time swap. This is great when you have little ones who are three or
older. Set aside ten to thirty minutes for a little one on one time with each child; based on how
many children you have this can be a longer or shorter period of time. If you have two children,
say a boy and a girl, set a timer for 15 minutes and dad plays with the little girl and mom plays
with the little boy. When the timer goes off, switch, mom with girl, dad with boy, and finally,
girl and boy, and mom and dad get some one on one time.
Create family rhythms that work for your family early on and your little one will just naturally
grow into them. While they are little think through what sorts of patterns work for you and
make that happen. In our home the TV is almost never on, evening time is family time. We
build with blocks, play with play-doh, read and do “tickle-family” time. It recharges everyone’s love tank and no matter how crazy the week gets, it keeps our family energized for the week.
Envision what kind of home life you’d like for your family and then build in a support system via
routine and cutting activities that are more draining than renewing to make it happen.
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Let Others Pamper You
I’m such an independent person, I have a tendency to try and do it all myself. I don’t want to bother or inconvenience anyone so I tend to go it alone. The fact is, if you try to do this
mommy-thing alone you’ll likely end up feeling so isolated you risk being depressed. We all
need community. And especially when we’re struggling with the mundane task of changing
diapers, feeding little ones, and putting them to bed. One day can easily melt into the next and
you forget who you are.
If someone offers to help, and it does not inconvenience you or your children, take them up on
it. Don’t be afraid to form a support group before baby comes and then once baby arrives take
them up on their offers to help.
Ways Others Can Help
~Make a meal for you
~Run to the grocery store for you
~Help clean a room of your house
~Prepare freezer meals for you, this could even be from ingredients you provide
~Watch your baby while you go get a pedicure or massage
~Hold your baby in your home while you take a nap or catch up on something that needs to be
done at home
This is where the time I’ve spent investing in others has helped me find help when I need it. My
husband and I host a small group from our home. This is a group of four couples and we’re doing a book study on marriage together. One of the women in the group and her husband are
now going through the “empty-nest” phase. One evening she called to ask if she could watch my boys so I could take a “mommy-break”. Her call was an answer to prayer, as I needed to have some dental work done that week.
Now dental work isn’t what I would call being pampered. But being able to sit in a dentist’s office and not have to worry about my little guys getting bored or objecting was a nice treat
indeed.
Never underestimate the power of prayer or the benefit of “sowing and reaping”. Give of yourself to others and you’ll find you have more resources than you believed you would ever
have.
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Finding Joy in the Transition
When you are a new mom or a mom with an infant and other children, you can find yourself
exhausted. At times it may seem like there is no end in sight.
It gets easier. I promise.
My husband and I were at church with our firstborn and a total stranger walked up to me and
said, “It does get easier,” she added, “It gets a little easier about every three months.” I guess she could read how exhausted I was based on my body language and appearance.
You know what, she was right. Just about every three months your little one will gain a new skill
that enables them to be a tad more independent. In the early months it may be something as
simple as holding their head up on their own.
By the time they get to be three they can dress themselves. Celebrate these small milestones
and give thanks at every step.
Thankful people are happier and have more joy. Find something to give thanks for in the now.
Even small milestones can be reason to celebrate.
Also keep in mind that with each new gain you may be celebrating not just new firsts but
some lasts as well.
I still remember the last time I nursed my eldest son. It was June 4. Yes, I remember.
Celebrate the firsts, give thanks, and treasure the lasts.
I’m the opposite of tall and my eldest is only three and he barely fits in my lap anymore. I’m going to be so sad when he’s too big for my lap. I’m so thankful that he’s growing and healthy but I want to treasure this time of him still being small enough to fit on my lap.
A trick that has helped me beat feelings of being down or worn out is to turn on worship music
and spend some time praising God. You may find it helpful to just turn on your favorite tunes.
Time spent in worship and in counting your blessings is a sure way to beat the blues.
Another key to feeling better and having more energy is to name the things you’re thankful for and write them down. I love to journal and when I look back and see how far I’ve come or how much my boys have grown I stop in awe. Keeping track of my progress as a parent and their
growth and development as my children helps me to see how much I have to be thankful for.
It especially helps when my children make a big mess, or get into a squabble. I can look at my
journal and remember when they first crawled or ate from a spoon. It helps me keep my head
on straight when I feel like I’m going backwards instead of forwards. 106
Try to avoid people who are negative and who sap your energy and surround yourself with
people who are life giving, encouraging, and who inspire you. I can’t remember where I heard this, but I have found it to be true, “You become the average of the five people you spend the
most time with.”
Be selective about who you spend time with. Especially when you have little ones, you need to
be around friends who energize you. You are already supporting the life of a little person, which
can be draining at times; you don’t need anyone else to be a drain on you. Try to set realistic
boundaries so that you can keep your energy up and your focus on your little ones.
I’ve always believed that we have an enemy that wants us to focus on what we don’t have and not on what we do have. Find the sacred, blessed gifts even in the mundane and tedious tasks
of the everyday and you can find joy.
If these things do not help, keep in mind that postpartum depression is a very real thing.
Postpartum depression is a serious illness that may be caused by the change in hormones after
giving birth. This includes loss from miscarriage or stillbirth.
The Symptoms of Postpartum Depression
(according to WebMD)
~Feeling sad, hopeless, and empty. Some women also may feel anxious
~Lose pleasure in everyday things
~Not feel hungry and may lose weight (But some women feel hungrier and gain weight).
~Have trouble sleeping
~Not be able to concentrate
At worst case, these symptoms can lead a woman to wanting to hurt herself or her baby.
Postpartum depression must be addressed.
According to Ketherine Stone at of “Postpartum Progress,” “an average of 15% of all postpartum women in the US suffer from Postpartum Depression. According to the CDC, each
year approximately 950,000 women are suffering postpartum depression. The number is more
likely over a million women since the CDC only collects the statistics on women who “selfreport” their depression. What about all the women who were afraid to admit their feelings or
who failed to recognize the symptoms?
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If you are struggling don’t be afraid to seek help. As any woman knows, hormones are a tricky
thing and there is nothing more important than having a healthy mommy when you have an
infant and possibly other children in the home. Seek help if you need it.
Another wonderful resource for working through feelings of being overwhelmed is a book by
Ann Voskamp titled “One Thousand Gifts”. In it she explains her journey from depression to joy as she learned to look for the gifts God’s given even in the everyday things.
Ann points out that thankful people are happier people.
I highly recommend Ann’s book. It will mess with you in the most positive and constructive of ways and leave you a bit more enlightened about life.
“There is a way to live the big of giving thanks in all things. It is this: to give thanks in this one
small thing. The moments will add up.”
― Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are
That completes my list of the things I’ve done with my second child that have truly helped the transition from being a three person family to a four person family much easier than the
adaptation that occurred when we brought home our firstborn. I hope these tips are helpful to
you.
In case you are wondering why I am so passionate about writing this book and wanting to help
others, I thought I’d share a little background on our family building story. It’s been a journey and I’ve learned so much along the way. 108
Our Story
I was searching for a safe place to write this story. There is an R&R café less than two miles
from my home but it was closed the day I started writing. On a whim I decide to drive another 8
miles to our local hospital. It’s a beautiful building with a huge vaulted eating area with
gorgeous views of a 14,000-foot mountain covered in snow. I can hear the din of the dinners
below and as I glance out over this beautiful space I can’t help but think about how this place is such a dichotomy – here lives are birthed, and here the living breath their last breath.
I’m sitting at a small table in front of a walk thru café called the “healing grounds”.
Healing grounds could not be more accurate. This hospital was the birth of our firstborn son.
Born at 30 weeks he came into this life with a handful of problems.
Preemies have a disadvantage over babies born full-term in that certain organs may not be fully
developed. Our son, born at about 3 ½ pounds had to be on oxygen, fed intravenously through
a feeding tube, was battling Jaundice, and had issues with breacardia and reflux. For a preemie
he was actually considered to be a good size and the doctors and nurses noted that he was a
fighter.
As this was our first child it was quite an introduction to parenthood for my husband and I. Our
tender sweet baby was in an incubator and needed help breathing and eating and was hooked
up to a myriad of wires and tubes. He was under a special light to be treated for his jaundice
and we were only allowed to hold him for a half an hour per day.
He was our little miracle baby. Due to a rare blood clotting disorder, I had three miscarriages
prior to his birth and his entry into our lives was precious. He was an answer to much prayer
and petition to God.
We started off parenthood in prayer before we were pregnant, during the pregnancy, and
certainly while our precious, just over three-pound, baby boy was in the Neonatal Intensive
Care Unit (NICU).
Every day my husband and I visited the hospital. I would usually go in the morning, eat lunch in
the cafeteria and stay till mid-afternoon.
My husband would sometimes come on his lunch break and we would both come together in
the evening, often just after supper and stay until ten or eleven at night.
In the beginning there wasn’t a whole lot we could do. We were allowed to perform our baby’s cares – change his diaper, hold his feeding tube, wash his face, or give him a sponge bath
once a week.
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As he grew stronger, I was able to spend more time holding him and he eventually came off the
feeding tubes and could drink from a bottle and nurse.
The nurses and doctors were amazing. They cared for our little boy until he was almost five
pounds. After six-and-a-half weeks in the NICU we were finally able to take him home.
I read through all my son’s discharge papers and both neonatal doctors recommended that he
be nursed for a year and that extra precaution be taken to ensure that he did not get sick. We
went home with our baby on oxygen and we were warned that even a cold could put him back
in the hospital.
For a full year I went on a hiatus from the life I had prior to giving birth to my son.
I am so thankful for the time spent with the NICU nurses – they taught us how to feed, clean,
and care for our son. It was like a hands-on boot camp for new parents.
Despite all the training, nothing had prepared me for the commitment that would be required
of me as a new mom. My son had a weak suck and horrible reflux. He had to be fed often and
watched diligently. The cannula (breathing tube used to dispense oxygen) was difficult to keep
clean due to the reflux issues and my son was pretty good at pulling off the tape and dislodging
the cannula making it difficult to take my eyes off of him even for a moment.
I think the first few days home with him I don’t remember if I brushed my teeth. I don’t think I took a shower and I cared for my baby in a zombie like state since he would only sleep a little
over two hours at a time.
Then my husband came home. I was so thankful when he was allowed to take leave from work
to be home to help me. He took six weeks to be home with me and our baby.
Due to the oxygen and reflux issues my husband and I took turns sleeping for five or six hours
each night while someone stayed awake with the baby. My son had an adult awake watching
him sleep around the clock for those first six weeks at home.
We placed a pack-n-play with a bassinet attachment in the living room where our baby would
sleep on and off throughout the day and night. From about 8 PM till 1 AM my husband or I
would sleep in our upstairs bedroom while the other parent sat on the couch near our baby
either reading a book or surfing the Internet while our baby slept. Then around 1 AM we’d switch places and the other parent could sleep till six or seven AM.
Just before my husband returned to work we moved our little baby boy up into our room in a
Rock-n-Play sleeper where he would sleep on and off throughout the night with feedings every
three hours. When my husband went back to work our baby boy was growing stronger but I
was left to care for him during the workweek on my own.
110
I struggled being home alone but was afraid to see or meet with others due to his delicate
condition. I longed for friends but didn’t want to risk exposing him to illness. My only outing
after a month of frustration was to attend a nursing support group at the local hospital where
they would weigh my baby before and after feedings (nursing) to determine how much milk he
had ingested at the breast.
I attended classes on nursing for two months and was disappointed to discover that my son’s nursing wasn’t getting any better, in fact after 45 minutes at the breast he was actually taking in less and less. I remembered the doctor’s discharge papers and made it my resolve to get breast milk into my baby no mater what it took. I pumped milk every day for thirteen months
and my son received at least eight ounces per day.
Only six months after our son’s birth my husband and I discovered I was pregnant again. I
talked with my OB and she felt it was safe to continue pumping milk and she explained that
moms can and often do continue nursing while pregnant. I started treatment for my blood
clotting disorder to give our baby a fighting chance at life.
We had an ultrasound ten weeks later and the heartbeat looked good and all systems were go,
but my OB was keeping me under close watch. At about twelve weeks we discovered that the
baby’s heartbeat had stopped. Shortly thereafter, my body started the discharge process
naturally but when heavy bleeding continued longer than expected, my OB called me in for an
examination.
We discussed collecting some of the tissue from our now deceased baby to see if we could
determine the cause of death. My doctor examined me and dislodged some tissue during the
process. She also explained to me the importance of Xitatec to constrict my uterus to slow and
or stop the flow of blood because I had already experienced greater than normal blood loss.
I had used the drug before on a previous miscarriage and for me it is like hitting the eject
button on every orifice of my body. The last time I had used it I was vomiting, bleeding, and
needing to use the bathroom all at once. I did not want to take the drug again but agreed once
she offered to treat me for nausea prior to administering the Xitatec and she agreed to admit
me at the hospital.
Once we got to my hospital room I gave my husband instructions to gather some things for my
stay and he left to get them from our home. In the meantime, a friend was watching our son
during my OB appointment and now hospital admission.
The nurse took me to the ladies room and during my sit-down I lost more blood. She looked up
at me and said “are you feeling faint?”
I said, “uh-huh” and then I must’ve blacked out.
111
I woke up on the bathroom floor, (they used smelling salts to revive me), and I think I whispered
something like, “You have to save me; I have a baby.”
They managed to carry me over to the bed and got me into it.
I remember being terrifically cold. It felt like tiny little needles were prickling me all over my
body – most especially my fingertips. It was painful, but at that point I was thankful for the pain
– it meant I was alive.
A troop of nurses rushed in to help me. One was talking to me, “You passed out from loss of blood. You’re going to feel like you’re dying, but you are NOT dying. Your body is just trying to
recover from the loss of blood. We’re here to help you. How are you feeling?”
“Cold,” I managed to say. The nurses undressed me, put a diaper under my backside and quickly pulled covers over me. Then they started trying to get needles into my arms. On my left side
they got a needle in pretty quickly and started to administer fluids.
The fluids only made me colder but were absolutely necessary. On the right side she must’ve tried seven or eight times before hitting an open vein and getting more fluids flowing.
I kept asking the nurses for more warm blankets.
They got me stabilized and eventually I could feel warmth returning to my body. For a few
minutes I was left alone in the room by myself.
I was thankful to be alive and thankful to know that I would heal. I could feel the presence of
the Holy Spirit with me and I just knew from His presence, warmth and love that I was going to
make it and that I was going to be ok. I was sad about the loss of our baby but I was thankful for
life. I wanted to get better and get back home so I could take care of our firstborn son.
The nurses came back in and checked on me. I asked if someone could stay with me until I got a
hold of my husband and some help.
They agreed.
I called my husband and told him what had happened. He wished so much he had stayed with
me. He had sent our friend/sitter to the hospital with my things, she had three children of her
own that she needed to return home to. He suggested that I call another friend of ours to come
stay with me so that he could be home with our son.
Our sitter brought my things and I called another friend who stayed with me my entire stay at
the hospital.
When I arrived home the next day, I was so thankful to be home.
112
We had lost our baby, but I still had to take care of our first-born and I still wanted to ensure he
did not wind up in the hospital again. He was small for his age and as he grew and exerted
greater independence it was becoming harder to make sure he ate enough during the day. In
addition, he appeared to have food allergies that were causing his skin to break out.
I recommitted to holing us up at home. This commitment to protecting our firstborn from the
outside world enabled my baby boy to stay illness-free the first thirteen months of his life. In
fact, he didn’t get sick until I attended our church’s child-care with him one Sunday morning
when we finally made it back into our church building. Our church live streams services which
makes it possible to attend from home.
It wasn’t until my baby boy survived that first long week of upper-respiratory illness, and we
weathered it together, that I finally felt like he was going to be ok and that I could breathe a bit.
I was able to relax my shoulders, ever so slightly, and emerge from my mommy cocoon.
My OB and I had talked about my husband and I having another child. I was nearly 40 and she
could not find any medical reason for us to not try again. As before, once pregnant I was
required to start treatment for my blood clotting disorder – for me this required daily injections
of blood thinner and an aspirin a-day. My husband and I knew the risks but we did not feel that
God wanted to hold us back from having more children and we wanted our son to have the
experience of growing up with a sibling so we decide to try again.
It was less than two months later that we found out we were pregnant.
I think my son knew I was pregnant before I knew because one day he refused to nurse at all. At
this point I would nurse him in the morning and in the evening and then top him off with a
bottle. It wasn’t much but I was glad to still be getting some breast milk into him. Just two weeks before my son stopped nursing altogether I had stopped pumping because I
knew I was going to wean him. At the tail end of his nursing I tried for four days to nurse him
each morning; and every time he objected till I stopped and finally my milk ran dry and my son
contentedly drank from a bottle. I’ve read that pregnancy changes the taste of breast milk.
As with all pregnancies, I started my daily injections and was careful to avoid caffeine and take
my daily aspirin and prenatals. I was carefully monitored by my OB and I started progesterone
injections around week 22 to help prevent another premature birth.
I had all the challenges any mom would face being pregnant with an active one-and-a-half year
old toddling around the house. Despite the busyness of life, I was so thankful as each week
progressed. When we passed thirty weeks, which was during Christmastime, we were so
thankful. Each new day gave us hope that this baby would be one we could bring home from
the hospital without a stay at the NICU.
113
At about 33 ½ weeks things we experienced a bit of a speed bump. One of my beloved friends
hosted a baby shower for us and somehow my eldest contracted a nasty stomach-flu virus. The
symptoms included vomiting, diarrhea, chills and fever. We first started noticing a problem
when he wouldn’t eat. Within only a few hours he threw up and it was downhill from there.
Fortunately for my son, the most disturbing symptoms lasted just under two days, but
unfortunately for me, I contracted the virus, which caused my body to go into contractions. I
was admitted to the hospital and they got my contractions under control but from that point
forward I could not sleep because I was constantly experiencing Braxton-Hicks which made
relaxation difficult.
With lots of prayer, close monitoring my doctor, progesterone, and continued blood-thinning
treatment, I made it to 36 weeks when my water broke.
Our second son was born after only four hours of intense labor at thirty-six weeks. He was a
champion nurser from the start and after careful examination and monitoring by the staff at
the hospital, we were allowed to take him home after only a 48-hour hospital stay. He is a
happy, healthy toddler now, and a wonderful member of our family.
I know what its like to be a mom who feels like she is on over her head and doesn’t know where to turn for help. That’s why I wrote this book, to give tips on where to look for help. I think as
moms we take on a tremendous responsibility with our infant children. I encourage you to seek
help and build relationships with people you trust so you don’t embark on mommy-hood
alone.
Even for everything I’ve been through I would do it again 100 times over to hold my sweet baby boys. They bring so much joy to my life. After years of trying and all the complications, they are
the greatest gift ever given to my husband and me and we are eternally grateful.
I’ve had such a positive experience with my second son. A little planning, prayer and outreach have made all the difference. I hope this advice has been helpful. My prayer is this book will
help you prepare and adapt to life with your new baby. Again, “Congratulations”. 114
About the Author
Monica Pruett is an author and Christian mommy blogger at HappyandBlessedHome.com.
She’s the mother of two adorable boys and is married to her best friend Jimmy. Her passion is
to be an encouragement to moms and she publishes free printables and crafts for
preschoolers, devotionals for moms, and ideas for having fun together as a family. She truly
enjoys connecting with others and sharing what she is learning in the areas of mothering,
parenting, discipleship, and marriage.
If you enjoyed this book, you should visit HappyandBlessedHome.com. There you’ll find free
printables as well as free games and ideas for teaching your toddlers and preschoolers,
encouraging words for moms, as well as great ideas for ways to have fun together as a family.
Blog:
Facebook:
http://www.HappyandBlessedHome.com
https://www.facebook.com/HappyAndBlessedHome
Google+
Pinterest:
https://plus.google.com/u/0/+MonicaPruett/posts/p/pub
http://www.pinterest.com/happyblesshome/
Twitter:
Bloglovin':
https://twitter.com/MonicaPruett
http://www.bloglovin.com/en/blog/5486243
115

Baby Activity Tracker - Happy and Blessed Home

Transcription

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