SPEAK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG GUN
Transcription
SPEAK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG GUN
SPEAK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG GUN A CASE STUDY OF PROFESSIONAL DANISH FEMALE COUNTER-STRIKE PLAYERS MASTER’S DEGREE THESIS DESIGN, COMMUNICATION & MEDIA Tore Vesterby K-DKM E2002 160875-1943 The IT University of Copenhagen January 2005 Supervised by TL Taylor Acknowledgements My most heartfelt thanks go to Artamis, Muus, NissePigen, Tatiana, Tibi and Vildkatten for giving me a glimpse into their world; to TL for not only providing great guidance, but also for her patience and fantastic advice; to Rikke for her sharp mind, love, support and dedication; to Jytte and Jonas for spending hours finding the little errors; to the readers of my blog whose input may not be all that obvious, but who made me feel like this was something that interested people. 2 . 3 Abstract................................................................................................... 6 1. Introduction, Research Questions and Methodology ....................... 7 Introduction......................................................................................................................7 Research Questions and Methodology ........................................................................... 11 2. Research History of Women and Computer Games ........................17 Constructionism vs. Essentialism. Women and Technology........................................................................ 17 Three Key Research Areas: Game Content, Game Spaces and Gaming Activities.......... 18 Gendered Spaces.............................................................................................................20 The Gendering of Offline Spaces ..................................................................................................................... 21 The Gendering of Online Spaces...................................................................................................................... 22 Gendered Gaming Activities...........................................................................................26 Intel Doesn’t Play With Women ....................................................................................................................... 27 Summary......................................................................................................................... 31 3. Offline Game Spaces and Activities................................................. 32 Cyber Cafés.....................................................................................................................32 Girl Gamers – a Minority in Cyber Cafés ........................................................................................................ 34 The Cyber Café as a Social Space...................................................................................................................... 39 Summary................................................................................................................................................................ 40 LAN Events .................................................................................................................... 41 The LAN As A Gendered Game Space........................................................................................................... 44 Supporters and Socialisation at LANs.............................................................................................................. 47 Professionalism .................................................................................................................................................... 49 Summary................................................................................................................................................................ 50 Domestic Gaming...........................................................................................................50 Owning a Gaming Computer ............................................................................................................................ 50 Non-gaming Women’s Reactions...................................................................................................................... 52 Summary................................................................................................................................................................ 53 4. Online Game Spaces and Activities ................................................. 54 Inside the Game Space ...................................................................................................54 Good Girls Don’t Swear..................................................................................................................................... 58 Summary................................................................................................................................................................ 61 4 IRC Channels and Game Sites........................................................................................ 61 Stars and Starfuckers ........................................................................................................................................... 64 Summary................................................................................................................................................................ 69 5. Conclusions and Future Perspectives.............................................. 70 Bibliography ......................................................................................... 74 Appendixes ........................................................................................... 77 I – My Gaming Bias........................................................................................................77 II – Interview Guide: Group Interview............................................................................78 III – Interview Guide: Individual Interview with Vildkatten...........................................80 IV – Sample Interview Guide: IRC Interviews ................................................................82 V – Summary of the Work Process..................................................................................84 5 A B S TRA C T When the Entertainment Software Association published numbers in 2003 showing a growth in the industry by 8% and that 39% of gamers in the US were women their Danish counterpart, Multimedieforeningen, were quick to attribute these numbers to women playing games where they were either nurturing virtual families in the Sims or dancing with their friends using the EyeToy. Yet in July 2004 the Danish female Counter-Strike clan Team All 4 One won the female division of the Electronic Sports World Cup taking home $10,000. They may be a minority, but there are women in Denmark who choose to play Counter-Strike on a professional level, who are making money by shooting virtual people in the head and planting bombs. Looking at these games on a purely content centred level does not allow us to see why it is that some women choose to break the social norms of what games they should be playing. In this thesis I discuss gender and games by moving beyond the mere content of Counter-Strike in order to take a closer look at the social spaces where these women play the game, and how gender roles are constructed on the Danish Counter-Strike scene. By doing a case study of Team All 4 One I document their experiences of the scene through a series of qualitative interviews and ethnographic observations and I show how carefully these women must tread in order to gain acceptance by their male peers. Also I make a case for how we may gain a more nuanced view of female gamers and their motivations for playing games, which has often been branded as boys’ territories both by research and the industry. 6 1 I N T RO D U C T IO N , R E S E A RC H Q U E STI O N S A N D M E T HO D O LO G Y Introduction It was 19:30 p.m. on a Tuesday evening in central Copenhagen in the spring of 2004. I’d just stepped into Boomtown, a cyber café with one hundred pc’s ready for gamers who want to try out any contemporary computer game from Battlefield 1942 to Diablo II Lord of Destruction. The room was dark. The only light came from dimmed lamps and the flashing from the 100 monitors. The place was two-thirds full with roughly 50 or 60 people - only about 25 to 30 PC’s on the top balcony were unoccupied. As I looked closer I noticed something, which struck me as very lopsided. There were only two women in the room; one of them was checking her Hotmail account, the other was chatting via MSN Messenger. I thought to myself, “Why aren’t they playing any of the games offered, and more importantly, why are there so few of them?” Had I not known better, I would have instantly connected the lack of female gamers in Boomtown to the violent content of the games being played. However, in November 2003 I had been lucky enough to hear Aphra Kerr present a paper at the DIGRA Level-Up Conference, which focused on female console gamers in Ireland. Among other things the paper concluded that the women played console games that were both violent and non-violent, that the women were not visible in the traditional public gaming spheres and that there was a lack of female friends in their social networks whom they talked to about games (Kerr 2003). So although I was prepared for the lack of female gamers in Boomtown, I was still curious about what and where the female gamers here in Denmark were playing. I knew adult women in Denmark were playing games since I had read a press release from Multimedieforeningen1 where they were using numbers from a survey conducted by the Entertainment Software Association2 in the United States claiming that “eight percent in 2003 to $7 billion – a more than doubling of industry software sales since 1996 […] the average age of a game player is 29 1 The Danish Association of Multimedia Developers. 2 Numbers such as these should be taken in with caution, because the methodology behind the survey is closed to the public. See Heide Smith (2001) for a detailed critique of a similar survey. 7 years old [and] thirty-nine percent of game players are women.” (ESA 2003). In the press release Claus Due, the former president of Multimedieforeningen, ascribed the increased sales in computer games to the success of marketing games to women: Some of the best selling computer games target girls and women. E.g. the popular series The Sims, where you create and develop a virtual family. Also innovative initiatives like the EyeToy for the PS2 draw the girls in. Here you are yourself a part of the games where you, among other things, dance and move about in competition with friends. (Multimedieforeningen 2003). This view of female gamers seems extremely simplistic since it does not take into account that you can actually kill your virtual family in the Sims by burning, electrocuting and starvation (ChocoCat) or cases of child prostitution in The Sims Online (Ludlow 2003) or even that the EyeToy also includes a Kung-Fu fighting game. With this in mind I found Due’s conclusions to be very broad and not very focused on the actual games women were playing. The fact that many women play games which do not have to do with ’virtual families’ or ’dancing and moving’ has been explored extensively by research in the last couple of years (Cassel & Jenkins (eds.) 1998, Yates & Littleton 2001, Bryce & Rutter 2002, Taylor 2003, Kerr 2003, Graner Ray 2003, Krotoski 2004). One group of women who do play a game which has nothing to do with nurturing or dancing is the Danish Counter-Strike clan Team All 4 One who I firmly believe represent a different type of female gamers than the one Claus Due mentions. Team All 4 One are the reigning un-official World Champions of women’s Counter-Strike, an online multi-player first person shooting game. They beat teams from all over the world at the Electronic World Sports Cup 2004 (ESWC) in France back in July 2004 where they won a cash prize of $10.000 – the largest prize ever in women’s Counter-Strike. The team consists of five female players who in the Counter-Strike community go by their nicknames: Artamis, Muus, NissePigen, Tatiana and Tibi. When they played at the ESWC they also had a female coach, Vildkatten, who left the team in August 2004. The reason I believe they represent a different type of female gamer has to do not only with the game content, but the context in which the game is played, which I will proceed to describe below3. Counter-Strike4 was originally created as a modification, or mod, to the Half-Life engine from (Sierra 1998), which pits anti-terrorists against terrorists. The game’s graphics are based on 3 If you are already familiar with Counter-Strike and the context the game is played in feel free to skip ahead to p. 11 4 Counter-Strike version 1.5 was what tournament organisers were using as the basis for all competitive play during the production of this thesis. In late November 2004 Counter-Strike: Source based on the Half-Life 2 engine was released, but at the time of writing it had not become the tournament standard. 8 modern day weapons and combat gear. Counter-Strike has been played competitively in Europe for almost six years and a huge community of thousands of players log on to game servers every day. Several versions of the game have been released with different tweaks and changes made to the game to balance gameplay, to facilitate server rules or to prevent cheating in competitive games. Whereas casual play in Counter-Strike, or CS, is based on you logging onto an open FreeFor-All-server (FFA) where you can be assigned a random team and play infinite rounds on one of the many maps available for the game, competitive play is a much more structured affair played on password protected Clan War-servers (CW). Competitive Counter-Strike is centred round specific clans that compete against each other in socalled 5on5 games. A clan is a team that typically has five players and a coach. The players have very specific roles during the games. In competitive games thirty 2.5-minute rounds are played out where one clan is the terrorist team for 15 rounds and the other the anti-terrorist. In competitive play you win as the terrorist team by either planting a bomb in one of two bombsites and prevent the anti-terrorists from disarming it, which they have 35 seconds to accomplish after it has been planted. Or you can eliminate all the anti-terrorists. As the anti-terrorists you win by either preventing the bomb from being planted and going off or you can eliminate all the terrorists. In addition you ’earn’ money by performing certain tasks in the game such as eliminating an opponent. At the beginning of each round both sides can purchase weapons and grenades that make eliminating opponents easier. While there is quite a large array of weapons to choose from, competitive gamers will often only choose from a very small selection of these based on the amount of money they have. The games are often broadcast live via a program called HLTV or the games can be downloaded from one of the many community sites around the world that serve as virtual clubs for the CS-players. The best competitive clans are often sponsored by companies which give them free gaming products – computers, mice, mice pads etc. – or provide free hosting for the clans’ private servers where they take on challengers. They have a coach whose role is to oversee the tactical aspects of the game, to create strategies that will foil their opponents. These clans compete in tournaments around the globe, which are played via Local Area Networks (LAN), rather than over the internet. This means that the players have to physically be in the same space in order to compete. The tournaments have cash prizes that have pots as high as $100.000, which is split by the top four teams. The gamers that participate in this type of tournaments are often referred to as “pros”. They may or may not be professionals in the sense that they can live off playing the game, although some do, but it is more a symbol of the clan’s ability to win games in these tournaments. Also being a pro-clan often means that hardware manufacturers or other companies wanting to get exposed through your clan will sponsor you. Getting to the 9 professional level of gaming requires hours and hours of training. Many play 4 hours or more every night. Before going to tournaments the pro clans meet in cyber cafés to ’Boot Camp’ which means playing long stretches of Clan War games in order to polish their tactics. Team All 4 One, or just A4O, fit the bill on all of the above. They practice four to five hours four days a week, they are reported on by Danish gaming community sites, they have also done interviews in major Danish newspapers and the radio, and national TV has interviewed one of the clan members too. In addition to this the clan have their own website and IRC-channel5. During my research I was able to observe the clan play on several occasions and they play in exactly the same manner as the professional male clans do: they are extremely concentrated, their eyes never stray off the screen, the communication between them is purely tactical and focused on what happens in the game. In other words the only immediate difference between them and other professional Counter-Strike clans is their gender6. Counter-Strike at this level is not child’s play. The players in the clan, Artamis, Muus, NissePigen, Tatiana, Tibi and their former coach Vildkatten are all adult women aged 19-29. They hail from different backgrounds. Artamis is a multimedia designer, but currently works at a cyber café. Muus has finished studying engineering and is looking for work. NissePigen has almost completed her Master’s Degree from business school. Tatiana is taking courses to qualify for an education in engineering. Tibi has almost completed her Bachelor’s Degree as a nurse. And Vildkatten has just begun university studies in Nordic Languages and is further more a single mother. In other words, these are not young girls with time to kill. I believe that Team-A4O go against the perceptions of female gamers, I mentioned earlier, on several levels. While they’re supposed to be dancing and nurturing virtual families, they’re firing virtual guns and planting bombs. They not only practice from their home computers, but they Boot Camp in cyber cafés. Also they participate in LAN-tournaments playing against male clans to practice for the few international events available to female Counter-Strike clans. However they are the only professional female clan in Denmark7, which makes them a very rare and exceptional group. I believe that by doing a case study on Team All 4 One, which examines their experiences on the competitive Counter-Strike scene I can provide a better understanding of how 5 IRC or Internet Relay Chat is a text messaging protocol. 6 There may be subtle differences in gameplay, but my expertise in Counter-Strike is too limited to judge this on an empirical level (see Appendix I). 7 There are a two other Danish female players who play competitively in the Danish-Swedish female clan Les Seules at the time of writing. 10 some female gamers do not fit the stereotypical expectations of being nursing and social creatures, but rather fit the mould of professional Counter-Strike players. Research Questions and Methodology I have been exploring five key research questions for the case study of Team All 4 One: 1. How do adult female gamers get drawn to Counter Strike so much that they decide to play it on a professional level? 2. What social structures embody the spaces they play Counter-Strike in? 3. How do their male counterparts regard these female gamers? 4. How do these gamers view femininity in regard to playing Counter-Strike? 5. What challenges lie ahead in getting more women interested in competitive Counter-Strike? In order to explore why the women choose to play CS professionally and the context around them I conducted a qualitative semi-structured group interview with five of the players - Artamis, Muus, NissePigen, Tatiana and Tibi - at of one of the clan member’s residence in Copenhagen. This was followed by an in-depth semi-structured qualitative interview with Vildkatten, the clan’s former coach, in her apartment in Århus. Additionally I was able to conduct two sessions of participant observation. One at a Boot Camp session the clan had in PlayTown, a cyber café north of Copenhagen and one at Played LAN – a Counter-Strike LAN competition held in a run down factory in Albertslund west of Copenhagen. The observations were followed up by five semi-structured qualitative text based IRC-interviews with the players. I contacted Team All 4 One by sending Vildkatten a message by joining the forum which was on the clan’s website. She sent my request to Artamis, who contacted me after about two weeks, and who then helped set up the group interview in her flat with the other players. For the group interview I prepared a semi-structured interview guide, which thematically explored the questions I was exploring at the time (see Appendix II), but which also gave the interview a less formal form more akin to a conversation, because the questions can flow more freely in the interview context, as pointed out by Kvale (1997:131) and Mishler (1996:117). This would allow me to explore their responses as they popped up during the interview session and let them have a say in what was relevant to their experiences rather than me using a closed interview guide to make Team-A4O’s answers fit into my predetermined view of female gamers and the problems they face. 11 Aside from gathering data I hoped the group interview could serve as a stepping-stone for further interviews and the possibility of seeing them either practice or compete. Since this was my first meeting with them I wanted to come off as being easy going and not be a burden on them. Additionally I thought a group interview would be a good way to start because they might feel intimidated by inviting an unknown man into their homes if they had not established a better idea of what his intentions and motives were. Also a group interview would give me a good idea of the dynamics within the group in order to see if I would need to take special considerations when conducting individual interviews. As a show of good faith I went to a good bakery and brought some brownies along too. Before going there I also wanted to figure out what level of confidentiality would be appropriate for this interview, since I would be quoting the women in this thesis, which made their utterances public rather than private and hence their statements could potentially be used against them by third party readers. I made a few lists of gains and losses of three confidentiality levels in order to figure out what would be the most suitable for the interview: High confidentiality: • Use of pseudonyms for the clan members • Use of a pseudonym for the clan name • No use of graphics from the clan’s site • No mention of articles that refer directly to the clan Gains Losses 1. The informants may feel that they can speak completely openly and not feel restrained to only speak positively about a hobby, which they really like and do not want to see put in a negative light. 2. I can be critical of the informants’ statements without risking that I inadvertently offend them or give them a feeling that I’m exploiting their statements. 3. The case-study might seem more exemplary if similar studies are done in other countries. 12 1. I won’t be able to show graphics from their website or use quotes from news articles, where the informants have voiced their opinions before. 2. The informants may think that I’m trying to hide something by not allowing them to use either their own names or their gaming aliases. 3. I will not be able to use photographs of the informants. 4. I will not be able to mention specific tournaments that the team have won or participated in. Medium confidentiality: • Use of pseudonyms for the clan members and/or the clan name Gains Losses 1. I can be critical of their statements without exposing them personally. Internally they will know who said what, but it won’t be public knowledge. This may save them from potential personal attacks from the community about what they say during in the interview(s). 1. The informants may feel that they cannot speak completely openly and may feel restrained to only speak positively about a hobby, which they really like and do not want to see put in a negative light. 2. The informants may think that I’m trying to hide something by not allowing them to use either their own names or their gaming aliases. 2. I can show graphics from their website or use quotes from news articles, where the informants have voiced their opinions before, which can then be analysed. 3. I will not be able to use photographs of the informants. 3. I can mention specific tournaments that the team have won or participated in. 4. I cannot directly correlate what they’ve said in other media or (maybe even) their website without compromising the confidentiality level. 5. The informants may think that I’m trying to hide something by not allowing them to use either their own names or their gaming aliases. Low confidentiality: • No use of pseudonyms at all Gains Losses 1. I can show graphics from their website or use quotes from news articles, where the informants have voiced their opinions before, which can then be analysed. 1. I cannot be critical of their statements without exposing them personally. 2. The informants may feel that they cannot speak completely openly and may feel restrained to only speak positively about a hobby, which they really like and do not want to see put in a negative light. 2. I can compare their statements in the interviews directly to what they’ve said elsewhere – e.g. in the media or on their website. 3. I can mention specific tournaments that the team have won or participated in. I had planned on giving them the ‘medium confidentiality’ option, so before we began the interview I told the women that I would offer them pseudonyms in order to protect them from 13 potentially having their comments made public, which could give backlash. However, they raised their eyebrows and said that would not be necessary. So the ‘loss’ I had considered when it came to giving them the option of a ‘low confidentiality’ level did indeed prove to be warranted. This meant that I have provided the women ‘low confidentiality’ for the purposes of this thesis since this seemed like the best way to let the informants speak with their own voices rather than them being part of an anonymous mass (Mishler 1986:125). Also during the introductory briefing I told the women that the purpose of my study was to examine what it was like to be a female CounterStrike player in Denmark, and that the focus of my study was not to look critically at the violence of the game and it’s effect on gamers. I hoped this could frame the interview as a discussion of their experiences and to let them speak about the game without having to guard their statements about the game, by toning down elements that could potentially be used to demonise the violence in the game. For the individual interview with Vildkatten my introduction was similar to the group interview, but since it took place after the group interview and the others had been given ‘low confidentiality’ I could not offer her one of the other options because her former clan would know who she was and anonymity would then be impossible at any level. This did have an effect during the interview at one point when she stopped and asked who would hear the interview. I told her that I would transcribe the interview and send it for her to read, and if there was anything she was not comfortable with being published she was welcome to veto those parts, which gave her the option of being a collaborator (Mishler 1986:126) on the data from this interview. This interview was also conducted using a semi-structured interview guide (See Appendix III). Both the group interview and the interview with Vildkatten were conducted in Danish, and were recorded on minidisk. I then partially transcribed the interviews, ignoring pauses in their speech patterns, which made the transcriptions easier to read. Also I left out passages about specific in-game tactics, which were not relevant to my research questions. I have only translated the passages I quote into English, as translating the entire transcriptions would simply have taken up too much time. My plan of using the first group interview as a stepping-stone paid off and I was allowed to come along for a ‘Boot Camp’ session at a cyber café and at a LAN, as previously mentioned. For these observations I adopted a role of observer participant that allowed me to just “hang around” (Blomberg et. al 1993:131), which meant staying in the background and taking notes in some situations and asking direct questions to either the women or other people I came into contact with at the cyber café and the LAN. I had brought along a camera for the LAN, but I refrained from taking pictures of Team A4O there, mainly because of my own trepidation of appearing too intrusive or too ‘fan-like’, I think. During the observations I tried to focus on the social 14 interaction of the women both among each other and their interaction with other people there – either male or female – and the gender roles these took in the space. I have attempted to sketch out where my presence as an observer came into question in Chapters 3 and 4, where I analyse the data. The five IRC-interviews were conducted after the observations in order to further understand how the women constructed meaning from their experiences there. I ended up using IRC as the medium for these interviews rather than doing face-to-face interviews because it proved very difficult to schedule individual two-hour interviews with the women because of their busy schedules. Instead I decided to attempt to do these via private IRC-interviews. I had to take into consideration that the instant text-messaging interviews come with some limitations. First of all it requires that both interviewer and informant are proficient to some level with using an IRC-client and that the interviewer is aware of some of the conventions that users of these text based messaging tools use to indicate facial expressions or short hand spellings for commonly used words. In fact the more I considered the matter, the more it made sense to conduct this type of interview with the women since the clan have their own IRC-channel where they post news or chat with friends. This meant that they were very proficient with this form of communication. My experience with the medium comes from playing an online fantasy football game for about a year where the central nerve of communication of the league was done in an IRC-channel. I do want to add that although IRC-interviews have qualities that are reminiscent of conversations they do not give as detailed descriptions as spoken conversations. This is in part because of the extra time required to type something rather than say it, but also because the IRC-clients limit how many characters can actually be typed by one person before it is sent. There is however a quality of the IRC-interview that I was very happy to be able to use. The client automatically logs the entire ‘conversation’ in a text file. This meant that I did not have to worry about transcribing these interviews. I made appointments with all five members of Team All 4 One, by contacting them individually in a private channel. This also proved to be a small oversight on my part, because the appointments were postponed on several occasions, showing a weakness of this method. Namely that it is not as binding as a face-to-face interview where you are physically in the same room. Before each interview I had prepared an interview guide that I could copy paste questions from, which made the whole process of typing much faster for me. Before each interview I warned the informant of this, so they would not think I was trying to flood them with questions. Unfortunately the interview with Artamis had to be cut short and we could not reschedule due to her busy timetable, but the other four women were available for IRC-sessions that took between one and a half to two hours. During the interview with Tibi I stumbled upon an interesting 15 benefit to this type of interview. While we were doing the interview she had to do laundry, but it was very easy to stop the conversation and pick it up again because the last sentences and themes discussed were visible on our respective monitors. Finally I want to mention that as a parallel to the writing of this thesis I have also made use of a weblog (http://vesterblog.dk) that I set up in order to have a tool for generating ideas and getting potential leads to further discussions on topics relating to women and computer games. The ideas I have posted on the blog throughout the production of this thesis have often been unfinished thoughts or links to online material that dealt with this theme, and hence there is no direct textual relation between the blog and this project. The blog is in other words a textual extension of my thought process rather than an actual complimentary text to be read in conjunction with the thesis. 16 2 R E S E A RC H H IS TO RY O F WO M EN AN D CO M P UT ER GAMES It seems to me that a shift in the perception of women and their engagement in playing computer games has occurred over the last seven years or so in research on the subject. We have moved from the more radical feminist views of games only appealing to macho gamers’ fantasies (Wajcman 1991: 154) to a more nuanced view of female empowerment through gaming in which games offer multiple pleasures for women (Taylor 2003). The discussion now seems not to be concerned with whether women are playing or not, but rather to be focused on what women are playing. This is where I believe the discussion becomes interesting when looking at Team All 4 One, because they represent female gamers who by many accounts are part of a minority of women who play first person shooter games (Yates & Littleton 1999, Morris 1999, Schott & Horrell 2002, Graner Ray 2003, Krotoski 2004). In this chapter I will be adding my voice to this discussion first by looking at how gender is socially constructed with regards to computer games rather than being a biologically determined barrier. I shall then be exploring the position that since games are social activities being performed in social spaces there is a need for research to focus on these elements (Bryce & Rutter 2002), which may play an important part in why women are such a small part of the gaming population of first person shooters. My own findings also point towards a context oriented explanation for why the women are playing Counter-Strike (see Chapter 3 & 4). But before I present the theoretical discussion that serves as the foundation of my analysis of the empirical data I want to clarify how I view gender and its relation to games. Constructionism vs. Essentialism. Women and Technology In order for us to have a more nuanced look at why women such as A4O play first person shooters it is important to understand the limits of the essentialist view of gender which leads to: the assertion of fixed, unified and opposed female and male natures […] The belief in the unchanging nature of women and their association with procreation, nurturance, warmth and creativity, lies at the very heart at the very traditional and oppressive conceptions of womanhood. Rather than asserting some inner essence of womanhood as an ahistorical category, we need to recognize the ways in which both ‘masculinity’ and ‘femininity’ are socially constructed and are in fact under constant reconstruction (Wajcman 1991:9). 17 My view on gender in this thesis is based on a constructionist view of gender, since I believe that this view gives me a more open approach to how we view male and female gamers and their preferences in games. The essentialist view is an oversimplification that on the surface level creates an illusion of being able to explain the divides between men and women and their approach to gaming, since warm and creative women simply should not blow up people intentionally. Instead of being an inclusive model essentialism becomes an exclusive model. The constructionist view on the other hand allows us to see a particular social act or activity as being gendered, but does not exclude people from either gender in taking part in that activity. In addition when looking at games I think it is important to remember that “[t]echnology is more than a set of physical objects or artefacts. It also fundamentally embodies a culture or a set of social relations made up of beliefs, desires and practices” (Wajcman, 1991:149). These social relations Wajcman claims are dominated by masculine values, which are rooted in an essentialist view of gender and women’s relation to technology. When we go beyond the artefact of the computer game – the code that makes playing a game on a computer possible, the graphics on the screen or the rules that govern it, we can also see a it as embodying a set of social relations made up of the beliefs, designs and practices of not only the game’s designers, but perhaps more importantly the people who actually play the game. Three Key Research Areas: Game Content, Game Spaces and Gaming Activities In my analysis of how these social relations have an impact on Team All 4 One and how they are perceived in the Danish Counter-Strike community. I want to present a theoretical framework established by Bryce and Rutter (2002) on gender and gaming, which I find particularly appealing, since it actually takes context into consideration on a large scale. Looking at numbers from the ISDA from 2001, which makes the claim that 43% of female gamers in the US are female8 they claim that: Given such figures, why do social attitudes and academic research on computer gaming continue to align the leisure pastime with boys, violence and a masculine culture? Why are females assumed not to play with the “boy’s toys” and female participation in and consumption of gaming marginalized? Why are we still having problems locating the invisible girl gamers? (Bryce & Rutter 2002:244) I find the above questions very appealing when it comes to studying women who play CounterStrike. Here we have a group of women who have embraced the “boy’s toys” and are playing at a level where they begin to profit financially from their gaming skills, and since they’re 8 Bryce and Rutter note that the methodologies of these market studies are questionable, as mentioned in the Introduction in Chapter 1. 18 professionals they appear in the media, which makes them visible to the public, and yet they’re marginalised in the gaming scene and by developers as seen above. Bryce and Rutter argue that women have been marginalised in previous game studies because there has been a heavy focus on looking at the games as media texts on a content level and that focus often comes up with results that point towards a male bias as the intended user of computer games (2002:246). An example of such a content based argument is in fact one that Wajcman used to described the lack of women playing games: Given that is men (often computer hackers) who design video games and software, it is hardly surprising that their designs typically appeal to male fantasies [...] Many of the most popular games today are simply programmed versions of traditionally male non-computergames, involving shooting, blowing up speeding or zapping in some way or another [...] No wonder then that these games often frustrate or bore the non-macho players exposed to them(1991:154). The first impulse of an aspiring game designer should then be to attempt to break this stereotypical male fantasy universe, which is exactly what the so-called Girl’s Games Movement attempted to do by creating games which were aiming to create games with content more in tune with what girls seemed to want (Cassell & Jenkins 1998, Laurel 2001). Purple Moon for instance produced the Rockett series of games where the content focused on issues which girls were dealing with in their everyday lives such as popularity, making friends etc.9 However, in opposition to the Girl’s Games Movement were the Grrl Gamerz who brought in a very vocal opposition to the view that girls did not want violence in their games (Cassell & Jenkins 1998, Morris 2001, Krotoski 2004). Yates & Littleton have shown how these colliding views of what women and girls wanted from games was to be found in how the Girls’ Game Movement and the Grrl Gamerz were in fact discussing the differences between the “structural elements (problem solving and strategy) [and] the representational elements (for example characters and graphics)” of the games (1999:115). A reading of the representational elements in Counter-Strike would say that the game engine had a male bias because of several of these. The game engine (Half-Life) was designed mostly by Sierra and the modification into Counter-Strike was created by Mingh Lee a.k.a. Gooseman (Wright et. al 2002). You cannot choose a female avatar in the game. The ‘male fantasies’ that the game explores include planting bombs, causing explosions and killing of opponents with modern weapons (see a screenshot on p. 20). However this reading says nothing about the structural elements of 5on5 competitive Counter-Strike, which involves team play, communication and carefully planned 9 Purple Moon did sell a lot of games, but their investors ended up pulling the plug (Laurel 2001/2?, which both the industry and many academics see as the failure of feminist games, however Jenkins (2001) points out that Purple Moon was in fact up against Barbie “the most successful girl franchise of all time”. 19 strategies. Yet, the only reason I know about the structural elements is because I have seen how clans play this game together (See chapters 3 &4). In other words the game context is vital to my understanding of the draw of the game. Other research points towards the structural elements being a vital factor in the enjoyment of games for adult women too. Taylor (2003) demonstration of the variety of pleasures women get from playing EverQuest, despite the fact that they still have to struggle with avatars that are very sexualised, to me indicates that the structural elements in a game may in some cases be more important to the players than the representational ones. Kennedy (2002) reaches a similar conclusion when looking at Tomb Raider. I am not stating that the Girl’s Games Movement did not have merit or that they failed in their attempts to create engaging games for their target audiences (see Jenkins 2001), but rather that the social and communicative aspects of multi-player fps games, are qualities that are enjoyed by women too. A gun fight in Counter-Strike where an avatar has just been shot (http://lednerg.home.comcast.net/misc/sprite02.jpg). Gendered Spaces In order to study the structural elements that gamers enjoy it becomes evident that we need to explore “the real world context and social environment within which gaming takes place” (Bryce & Rutter 2002:248). In this section I shall examine what characteristics and structures of game spaces are important to examine. These include both offline and online game spaces, which have qualities that I will describe below. 20 The Gendering of Offline Spaces Winner (1999) has explored the values, which certain forms of technology consciously or unconsciously on the part of the designers, enforce upon the users of that technology. He points to the overpasses that were built under Robert Moses in New York from the 1920’s to the 1970’s: The two hundred or so low hanging overpasses on Long Island were deliberately designed to achieve a particular social effect [...] Automobile-owning whites of ’upper’ and ’comfortable middle’ classes would be free to use the parkways for recreation and commuting. Poor people and blacks, who normally used public transit, were kept off the roads because the twelve-foot tall buses could not get through the overpasses. (Winner 1999:30). I see the above as an example of how the physical shaping of a social space very clearly limits not only how the space is used – i.e. what vehicles that can go on the road – but much more profoundly actually limits who can actually use the social space. I believe we can apply a similar approach to looking at the social structures of game spaces such as cyber cafés and LAN-parties and the values embedded in these. Bryce and Rutter put it like this We would argue that in many public gaming spaces it is the environments that are maledominated and this gender asymmetry works towards excluding female gamers at a stage prior to the gendering of gaming texts. Our view is consistent with the gendering of public leisure spaces, and their association with masculinity in which women are granted limited access and assume particular roles (2001: 249). By looking critically at how exactly these public gaming spaces are male-dominated I believe we can get a little more insight into the social structures where female gamers play Counter-Strike. Furthermore I think we may get a clearer understanding of why so few women are playing Counter-Strike in the cyber cafés in Denmark or at LAN events also known as LAN-parties (see Chapter 3). In fact when it comes to LAN events Bryce and Rutter have stressed that women often take part in non-gamer roles at the events taking on roles such as ”mothers who brought their sons to the competition, [...] girlfriends who [...] were there to provide support and a listening ear” (2001:249). In fact these gender roles seem to pre-date current social gaming spaces: “Video arcades. Which are central to the leisure of young male adolescents, are virtually off limits for most girls. They are populated almost exclusively by males; the few females in evidence are usually spectators” (Wajcman 1991: 154). The consequence of the male-bias in these spaces is that female gamers and participants are often marginalised. Female competitors were marginalized regardless of their skills with the computer (Bryce & Rutter 2002: 250). A contemporary example of this marginalisation is evident in a blogpost by Katla (2004) where she writes of an experience she had at the Gathering, the biggest LAN event in Norway with almost 5000 participants: 21 God dam assvipes made a movie , of a closeup of all the girls here, a closeup of their tits and ass. not tjheir brains. I hate the world they make. And i hate the fact that sex is in the end all that seams to count. It was to much to hope for. 5 days running around with fellow geeks, doing geeky stuff. I sdont think i want to go back here, and now i just want to go home, damb brats. now there is not female geeks here anymore. but girls, and doubt not for a secound that they are here for your pleasure only. […] they are still here. they did not get kicked out. and i doubt they will be. Dam shame, it could have been fun beeing a geek here. but i think ill just stay away. I think the above shows not only the kind of harassment women may be subjected too at a LANevent, but also how the hopes of the female participant for the event were shattered by the movie created by a group of male attendees (assvipes). Furthermore she seems to indicate that there were no sanctions from the event organisers, which seems to further her dismay: Katla could not just be a geek at the event, as she had hoped for, but instead felt treated as a sexual object. In fact the harassment of women as a minority is not exclusive to gaming spaces, it has been part of the male dominance of social spaces of computer culture for a number of years: “[…]boys actively and aggressively capture computer time where, as is usually the case, there is insufficient computer supply in schools. This harassment of girls interested in computing into tertiary education. At this stage the harassment takes the form of obscene computer mail or print-outs of nude women. Women students at computer science at MIT found this problem so pervasive that they organized a special committee to deal with it” (Wajcman, 1991:152-153). This shows that the harassment was not exclusive to the behaviour of young adolescents males, but that it went all the way into institutions of higher learning, such as MIT. My point is that if women have been consistently mistreated in the social spaces of both computing and gaming, a critical look at how the offline spaces where Counter-Strike is played may help us to get a better understanding of the experiences of how women who play are treated by male players. Bryce and Rutter seem to think that many of the women may find solace in gaming online due to the bias of these offline game spaces (2002:250). However, they also point out that home is not always a safe haven for girl gamers, since they may have to negotiate with male relatives, fathers or brothers over the control of the gaming systems at home as documented in other studies (Schott & Horrell 2001, Kerr 2003). Since the fathers and brothers own these consoles it may not be easy for girls to be allowed to play when they want to. The Gendering of Online Spaces Instead of having to deal with gender bias in offline spaces, female gamers have the option of going online to avoid marginalisation since: “[f]or female gamers, the anonymity of online communities around game skills provides the opportunity of competing against male opponents free from the markers of gender, reducing stereotypical behaviour towards female gamers. Participation in these spaces may 22 consequently lead to greater female participation in public competitive game spaces by building confidence in gaming skills and abilities which enable females to feel that they can compete on a socially equal basis with male gamers. (Bryce & Rutter 2002: 250). From the above I take it that Bryce & Rutter envision that the possibility of anonymity in online communities give women the possibility to hide their gender and they can thus play the game on an equal level without the gender-bias they experience in offline spaces. But what properties of online structures actually influence this? And are the online game spaces free from gender bias? Winner has stressed that certain artefacts may have inherent political values: “the intractable properties of certain kinds of technology are strongly, perhaps unavoidably, linked to particular institutionalized patterns of power and authority.” (1999: 38). The power and authority when it comes to the overpasses mentioned earlier reflects a conscious political motivation to keep poor people and blacks away from certain spaces, but as Winner also stresses these motivations are not always immediately obvious to the casual user of a piece of technology – although he does seem to indicate that these may be unavoidable. I believe that by taking a critical look at what values and patterns of power that exist within the social spaces that revolve around Counter-Strike we will begin to see a pattern that does not consciously exclude women from participating, but support structures which gives the spaces a male ’markedness’ - defined by Cassell and Jenkins as: ”a concept taken from linguistics to express the nature of relationships between members of a binary opposition where one member is more regular or simple than the other, more frequently found, more neutral in meaning, and more generic” (1998:35). It is not only artefacts that inhabit spaces but the actual “[s]paces have values. They express these values through the practices or lives they enable or disable. Differently constituted spaces enable and disable differently.” (Lessig 1999:64). Lessig also makes a distinction between cyberspace in general, basically all of online space, and cyber-places, which are communities in cyberspace that have their own values and regulations, enabled by both the code in the space and the people who occupy it (1999:63ff). Simply put a cyberspace is occupied by many cyber-places, or online spaces as I call them, which allow for certain types of interaction depending on what code is available to the users. The social spaces that come into play when looking at Counter-Strike are not limited to the actual physical spaces in which the game is played, either at home, the cyber café or the LAN, but there are several online spaces – or cyber places – which become important to take a closer look at. These include the game itself, the IRC channels used by the Counter-Strike clans and discussion forums on Danish gaming sites. All three types of cyber places have an impact on how women participate in the Counter-Strike scene in Denmark and might even in some cases have an impact on how the women play the game it self, as I will be showing in Chapters 3 and 4. 23 As mentioned above the possibility for anonymity is a viable option for women who want to avoid harassment. Lessig describes how the code of AOL makes this possible: “As a member of AOL you can be one of five people…What does this mean? A screen name is just a label for identifying who you are when you are on the system. It is not (indeed, often cannot) be your own name. If your screen name is “Stray Cat” [… and] you enter a chat room, the list of residents there will add you as “Stray Cat” (Lessig 1999:67). Additionally this gives the users the opportunity of having names, which do not give other users any hints of their gender – or it can give you the option of ‘cross-dressing’. In the above example “Stray Cat” is not marked as being male or female, whereas the name ‘John Spade’ is male marked. In AOL this also confers you the ability to be different people in different chat rooms. Since IRC is simply another type of instant messaging protocol, it is clear that the same options are available in that space and Turkle (1995:179ff) has documented that some women do in fact enjoy the opportunity to have a different role than their offline persona in these spaces. But what about the game space? In Counter-Strike where you are identified in the game by your ‘nick’, which corresponds to Lessig’s use of screen name, but you are not limited in the amount of nicks you can use and you can change this nick both before and during the game. This means that you can essentially hide your gender, whenever playing online. Additionally how you act in these online spaces has a very important impact on the bonds you can form with the other gamers in the space. These bonds can be dependent on physical knowledge of the players in the virtual space as is the case for EverQuest players: ”[C]ommon connections between players are physical and cultural proximity and previously shared gaming experiences. Most Scandinavian EQ players do, for instance, know other Scandinavian players that they have met through the game. Here the shared language, [...] time-zone and culture in general that works as an a priori condition for the development of the [social] networks (Jakobsson & Taylor 2003:84). When it comes to Counter-Strike this also seems to be the case. Clans will often meet in cyber cafés, which means they need to be living in somewhat close proximity to each other and thus are not often made up of players with different nationalities. So while anonymity may be an initial option for female gamers, if they’re to form bonds with other players in online spaces they must reveal themselves to their male counter parts, if they’re to be part of the community, since they will eventually have to meet them offline too. Additionally since Counter-Strike is dependent on ping speeds for servers and clan members being able to meet online at specific times to practice Bryce and Rutter’s vision that “Online gaming provides the opportunity to compete without the limitations of geographical location but, generally, within the limitations of temporal location (…exceptions… such as e-mail chess). This allows for the formation of online communities around game skills and competencies” (2002: 250) ends up becoming very difficult for professional or competitive Counter-Strike players. 24 Additionally revealing yourself as a female gamer in an online FPS game may have dire consequences. Morris (2000) gives examples of what female Quake and Quake 2 players experienced in the late 90’s and at the turn of the century. She conducted a survey of ten female quake players where the answers showed that: …the most overwhelming theme was the amount of gender-based harassment these women have experienced from male players whilst playing Quake on internet servers; for nine out of ten this harassment was severe. Some of this harassment was directly related to sex, such as offensive name calling, demands for netsex or descriptions of the girl's physical attributes, and some was just malicious. Girls have been 'kicked' off public servers (banned from playing) because male players didn't want any girls playing, or hunted down by other (male) players to prevent them being able to score. One girl reported a team game where members of her own team cornered her and 'killed' her because they didn't want a girl playing on their team. (2000) We can see from the above that the harassment that takes place in online spaces is harsh and often have elements which most Western societies do not condone in public physical spaces: offensive name calling, offers for netsex etc. It also goes to show that some male Quake gamers at the time were very much of the mindset that the game should be kept as a boys-only club, where women have no need to be, and subsequently kicked them from the cyber-space of the game. Similar examples in The Sims Online, Ragnarok Online and Xbox Live are presented in Schott (2004). But why should this be in an online space where you never even see the face of your opponent? Henry Jenkins points to parallels between 19th century boy culture and the computer game culture of modern boys (1998). He shows the boys’ culture of the time has been transferred to these cyber spaces that allow for what he calls ’complete freedom of movement’ for the boys, who are then out of their parents’ sight and can engage in social activities which are at times violent, but at other times explorative. With this in mind we can see the FPS as being constructed as a typical boys’ space in the minds of the male players, despite the fact that women do enjoy the freedom of movement which online virtual spaces provide (Taylor 2003:32-33). With the possibility of attacks from male gamers the wish for female gamers to remain anonymous is very understandable to me. Still, if women want to compete in tournaments they will inevitably be forced out of this anonymity. If you’re to compete professionally on an equal basis with male gamers – as Bryce and Rutter suggest – you must show up physically. And if the physical spaces are gender-biased towards male participants, how can the women hope to compete on an equal level? There are stories like that of Stevie ‘Killcreek’ Case, who was the first ever Cyberathlete Professional League (CPL) player in the United States (Kennedy 2004), but instances of top-female gamers entering the male dominated spaces on- or offline seem to be rare indeed and there are obvious limits when competing in tournaments to the anonymity of a screen name. 25 On a final note on anonymity, I want to stress that having the option of anonymity in an online community can also become a problem as Lessig (1999: 78ff) shows with his example from .law.cyber. Here a user by the name IBEX caused mayhem on an otherwise friendly and respectful message board tied to one of Lessig’s classes at Yale by attacking people on the board not ideologically, but personally. Lessig describes how this changed the mood of not only the boards but the mood in the physical class as well. This may be one of the reasons that the message boards of the Danish gaming sites such as XplayN.dk and Played.dk require players to register and log in order for them to post comments. Despite the above the online spaces for female FPS players is also one where friendly players meet and where lots of support can be found. This was the case for the Quake players Morris surveyed and her own experiences as a player: The majority of the women interviewed got into Quake and games in general because of supportive male friends, partners, brothers, fathers and other relatives. And many players online are happy to teach and exchange information regarding gameplay, new software and programming instructions with other players, male or female. I have online male friends who will ask me during a game about command line instructions or how to perform different programming functions, because they have learnt that I research and collect information and am happy to share. Apart from the immersiveness of the game in itself and the pleasure of learning and developing skills and exercising them in competition (as in any other sport), the social nature of the online multiplayer game was one of the things that really amazed me when I first discovered it. Often a community feeling builds up among players and people get to know each other quite well. Sometimes players will just log onto a game to catch up with friends and just chat (2000). Interestingly the invitation into the game space came from male players – as did they with the women interviewed by Kerr (2003) – and these males. Morris’s experiences in the Quake community are also a nod in the direction. This also points towards the activities that take place within these game spaces, which I shall examine below. Gendered Gaming Activities Having taken a closer look at the spheres of gendered content and gendered spaces I want to round up the theoretical discussion by looking at Gendered Activities. “Given that computer gaming is routinely claimed to be more popular and more frequently engaged by males [...], it seems a reasonable extrapolation that the activities and practices which constitute computer gaming are also gendered” (Bryce & Rutter 2002: 250). Here we are looking at not only how games are played by men and women, but also at how the gamers actually view their actions in and around the games. In fact Bryce and Rutter stress that: The gendering of gaming experiences is, in part, related to perceptions of gendered game content and notions of gender roles and appropriate leisure activities [3]. It has been suggested that females are more affiliative and nurturing, preferring leisure activities which 26 have a stronger social aspect [22]. This, when linked to a general (but largely empirically unsupported) perception that gaming is not a social activity, but a solitary activity for male ‘nerds’ or ‘geeks’, seems to quite neatly offer a model for understanding gendered gaming. (2002:251). A great example of this was a survey done of five hundred students, grades eight to twelve, showing that although 81 percent of students thought that “boys and girls are equally competent in the use of computers” their views were really quite different when they had to draw a ‘computer whiz’ and a computer ‘whizn’t’10 (de Castell & Bryson, 1998:236). One student’s drawings can be seen below: Computer Whiz Computer Whizn’t (de Castell & Bryson, 1998:237) Of the drawings collected 71 percent of the whizzes were of males, 18 percent female and 11 indeterminate. A striking example of how even though there may reign a conception of equity when it comes to computing, we still think of the experts of computer culture as being male. Intel Doesn’t Play With Women A hint that the survey above reflects a more general perception of computer experts could be seen online in April 2004, when Intel first launched their IT Manager Game. This game put you in the role of a (by default) male IT Manager, who had to support an increasing user base by hiring support staff – who all, incidentally were male too – and by buying Intel equipment for the company. You were also called in to speak with a male senior manager, who would ask you questions about what IT equipment the company should invest in. The astute reader will notice, that there were no women working in the company and even more interestingly you couldn’t hire women at all in this iteration of the game. The game clearly seemed to indicate that the world’s largest producer of microchips for personal computers did not see women as being part of the staff of a simulated IT company. Even more interesting was that they had clearly made an effort to include a varied racial spectrum of male employees, which makes the exclusion of women 10 Their terms for a computer expert and a person who can’t learn to use computers. 27 even more surprising, since they were obviously trying to avoid controversy on account of the gamer not being able to hire Africans or Asians. An example of one of the male employees you could hire in the game. This is Phillip, a Caucasian male, whom I considered hiring in my first try of the Intel IT Manager Game in April 2004. Intel did pull the game offline very quickly after the initial launch with the lines: “Your Interest in the IT Manager game is appreciated. Intel is currently making revisions to the game, please check back again in the end of May to test your IT Manager skills”. Their revisions added options for choosing whether your IT-manager was male or female and they included female employees for you to hire. The Intel example is superbly illustrative because it shows not only that women are perceived not to work with computer support, but also it presupposes that the intended player of the game is male. Strictly speaking the Intel example is a matter of gendered game content, but I believe it is a product of the designers’ perceptions of what types of players the game would have, and it also shows a male-bias to activities associated with computers from a huge multinational company. It should not be a surprise then that many adult female gamers are not quick to identify themselves as gamers, when they compare themselves to their male counter parts, whom they identify in that role (Schott & Horrell 2001, Kerr 2003, Schott 2004). Add to this that most of the women interviewed about whom they play with point to male friends, be it boyfriends, brothers, fathers 28 or male acquaintances in their social networks that are the ones that introduce them to gaming and who they continue to play computer games with (Schott & Horell 2001, Kerr 2003). This clearly marks the role of being a gamer as a masculine endeavour. Additionally “gamers are aware of the social stigma of being a gamers” (Yates and Littleton: 118) which infers that girls might be under both the stigma of being a gamer and being a girl gamer, in a way a double marginalisation. A clear case of how playing a game can be seen as a gendered activity is shown by Yates and Littleton (2001). They find that the affordances associated with a technology have a profound influence on the difference of how a group of boys and girls tackled a ‘game/task’. They used a piece of software “modelled on a physical game […] which involves manoeuvring a metal ring around a bent wire in such a way not to touch the wire. If the ring touches the wire, it closes a circuit and makes a buzz. The software version of this ‘game/task’ involves a cursor that represents a section through the metal ring and a deformed angular line representing the wire.” (2001:109-110). The reason they call it a ‘game/task’ is that they tested the software on a group of 11-year-olds, where there was no gender difference in performance between the boys and the girls when it was presented as a test, but when it was presented as a game there: “was a significant gender difference, favouring the boys.” (Yates & Littleton 2001:110). To me this shows that our perceptions of gendered gaming activities may be defined at an early age, but perhaps more importantly that the essentialist view that gendered activities are biologically inherited is flawed. Instead a game and a player are determined in the social context in which we define ‘playing a game’ and ‘who gets to play’. Another example of gendered gaming activity was seen in a study conducted in Australia of children in computer clubs: On a number of occasions the researchers asked girls and boys to play together in order to examine any differences in playing style in this circumstance. This resulted in a number of interesting incidents. The most common phenomenon, even though the children were aged 8 – 11, was that of flirting! Although the transcripts of the talk don’t reveal this, it was clear through other subtleties such as the eye contact, the tone of voice, the facial and body expressions. (Thomas & Walkerdine 1999). Here the activity of gaming is actually an excuse for something else for the children – attempting to get the attention of the other sex – which shows that the game itself is not central to the gendered activities taking place but rather that it serves as a tool for making oneself attractive. In addition Thomas and Walkerdine point to the expectations of parents and peers in what games the girls are engaged in playing and how much time they spend playing. They show how parents in the study seemed more concerned with girls spending many hours playing games than they did with boys. This leads them to conclude that: “Maybe it is simply not feasible, not ‘OK’ for girls to play games with the same intensity and passion as the boys because it is too threatening or it is devalued by parents or 29 peers” (Thomas & Walkerdine 1999). I interpret not feasible here as being part of a social construction around girls and gaming that prevents them from playing as intensely as the boys. Not because of who they are but because what is expected of them. In fact I believe that time and intensity are traits often ascribed to ‘hard core’ players and thus the social construction around these players is gendered at a very young age. However this was the construction of gendered play that female Quake players were attempting to deconstruct in the late 1990’s: The Crack Whores [...] construct on-line personas based on the clichés of pornography, stressing their measurements and their pleasure in ”fucking” and ”fragging.” Responding to a woman [...] Uncomfortable with the overtly sexual tone of their website, a Crack Whores spokesperson explained, ”Part of the online multi-player experience is the use of wild and extreme personas. Who would you rather deathmatch against, sweet Barbie from clan Doll or Street Fightin’ Mona from the CrackWhores. The name IS intended to shock and stimulate (Cassell & Jenkins 1998:33). Cassell and Jenkins interpret this as being a move of empowerment for these women: The ”Quake Grrls” movement gives these women, who range in age from their mid-teens to their late thirties, a chance to ”play with power”, to compete aggressively with men and to refuse to accept traditional limitations on female accomplishments. Their unconventional rhetoric playfully flaunts their militarism, yet their ties to feminism remain firm (1998:34). However, as I will show in the next chapters using this rhetoric in the Counter-Strike universe requires that you can back up your words, or they will most certainly come back to haunt you. So the question remains if their attempts of empowerment have transgressed from one game to the other. Additionally there seems to be another distinct difference in the Quake Universe and the Counter-Strike Universe of today. Kennedy (2002) has shown how female players could gain acceptance and empowerment by producing skins for the in game avatars that other players would use. Still, this practice does not seem to be an activity that either male or female competitive gamers engage in when it comes to Counter-Strike. To me this seems to indicate that the focus in the Counter-Strike community may be on gaming rather than on skinning. Despite these examples of how the Grrl Gamers seem to be trying to break the shackles of gender it is also important to realise that: ”[a]lthough the presence of these groups represented a significant counterbalance to the demarcation of the First Person Shooter genre as male, such accounts had a tendency to overshadow less political and overt game playing experiences” (Schott 2004). That less overt gaming experiences can in fact be gendered is further demonstrated by Schott’s focus-group study of female gamers using the GameBoy Advance SP. He shows that the women who had little gaming experience actually enjoyed the activity of playing games with the device, but were clearly thrown off by the marketing campaign for the device that featured a marked tagline ”for men” (2004:4). This seems to indicate that women do in fact enjoy the activity of gaming, but may be put off by gender-biased advertising before they even get a chance to try playing. In short they 30 are turned off by the representational elements of the advertising, while they actually enjoy the structural elements of playing the game. Summary Through out this chapter I have worked towards showing that by adopting a feminist view of the social construction of gender and technology I have been able to shift the focus of women and gaming from an essentialist assumption that women do not play computer games because of their inherent non-violent natures. By showing how game content can be seen on a structural level rather than a representational level I have adopted the argument that we need to be looking at the spaces games are being played in and what gaming activities that are taking place there. These spaces include both offline and online spaces, which all have a male-gender bias. This male bias can lead to very vehement attacks on the females who do enter them, but in turn their male friends in these spaces often protect these women. I have also shown how gaming is seen as a male activity where women are introduced to gaming by males in their existing social networks, how women do not identify themselves as being gamers and how even at a young age girls are socially instructed to see gaming as an activity where being ‘hard-core’ is for the boys only. In the next two chapters I shall apply these views to my empirical data showing how they have an impact on professional female Counter-Strike players in Denmark and how these have had an influence in their participation in the Counter-Strike scene in both offline and online game spaces. 31 3 O F F LIN E G A M E S PA C E S A C T IV I TIE S AND In the next two chapters I will be presenting my empirical results from my interviews and observations. This chapter will focus on the women gamers’ experiences in offline gaming spaces, where the next chapter focuses on their experiences in online gaming spaces. Together I believe they paint a detailed picture of some of the struggles they face and the benefits they reap from participating in these game spaces. During all the interviews and my observations the women were very engaged in talking about the structural elements of Counter-Strike. They focus on specific tactics, new strategies and issues with one map over another. To me this indicated that the representational elements of CounterStrike did not really have an effect on why they have chosen to play this game. However I do not feel that my knowledge of Counter-Strike tactics is adequate to properly analyse the way they talk about these elements, other than to say that at the LAN-event and at the cyber café the male players were using similar language about the game. This has led me to focus on the game spaces and game activities in my study of Team All 4 One. I will be presenting two offline spaces where I had the chance to observe Team All 4 One play the game: cyber cafés, LAN events. I will also present some of the experiences they have had with domestic gaming. My aim is to show how these spaces and activities that take place there influence the perception of female gamers and how they to some extent have advertent or inadvertent gender-biases that may be used to explain the huge gender gap found on the Danish Counter-Strike scene. I will be looking at how all of these spaces contribute to a gendering of Counter-Strike as a game beyond the content level, which in essence means looking at the social constructions that have been built up around gaming in these. I believe that this gives me a unique opportunity to look critically at these structures and the position of women in them and their chances for achieving equity as gamers. Cyber Cafés I met the clan at the PlayTown cyber café, which is in Lyngby, a well-off town north of Copenhagen. The café itself was nested in a shopping mall across from a fast food sandwich bar 32 and next to a multiplex cinema. Once inside the fluorescent lights in the café had been covered with a red filter giving a darkened atmosphere in the place. I saw a couple of cut-out figures from Warcraft 3 Frozen Throne as soon as I entered. The place was split into two rooms: an entry room that had maybe 30 or 40 computers in ’islands’ of four, where the bar was also located and a back room where there were maybe 30 or 36 computers places in ’islands’ of six. Team A4O checked in with the manager of the place - a man in the early to mid 30’s - and were given seats in the back room next to an opening to the entry room. I briefly told the manager that I was studying the clan and the manager gave me permission to sit in free of charge. The women took their seats, which had a tactical significance in the game depending on who usually covers whom. I’ve sketched out their positions below (the grey spaces being tables and computers), and shown where I sat during their boot camp: Tibi Artamis NissePigen Tatiana Muus Me I tried to sit as unobtrusively as possible in a position where I could see all their monitors and still have an overview of the room they were playing in. Sitting this way however meant that my back was to the corridor where other players would walk by, and since I was also jotting down field notes, I think this might have given some of the male players there the impression that I had an official connection to the team. It might have had an impact on how many or few of the male gamers there actually decided to stop and talk to A4O. Also, while I could observe all the players and see what they were doing when playing the game, it was not possible for me to see what was going on in the IRC channels that they were using between games which limited my observation to the physical space and the game space. The girls seemed pretty much ’at home’ in the cyber café. Most of them had brought their own equipment – mouse pad, mouse and headset. Tatiana had apparently forgotten hers which caused NissePigen to chide her in a friendly manner: ”We need to give Tati a list so she can remember her stuff!” They began setting up almost immediately: plugging in mice, checking keyboards and adjusting seats, logging on to IRC-clients and the game, and configuring the game using commands in the game’s console, which means tweaking the game to their preferred play style. Obviously they had plenty of experience in this type of game space. 33 Girl Gamers – a Minority in Cyber Cafés When I arrived at the café at 15:00 there were no girls or women playing games while the place was filled to about a third of its capacity with pre-teen and teenage boys. There were a few older men there – e.g. the manager. When A4O began setting up there were a few curious looks from the guys, but no one approached them at that time. Some of the younger boys were loud at times and a few were wrestling and hustling nearby where the clan were playing, however during a game which counted as a tactical exercise before an actual event all the women’s attention was tightly focused on the screen. At around 17:30 to 18:00 there seemed to be a shift in the age of the male gamers with more guys in their late teens and early 20’s showing up. At around 20:30 there were a couple of men in their 30’s too. While A4O were playing games a few guys came over to look over my shoulder, but whether this was out of curiosity or just to look at a clan playing the game was hard to tell, since they seemed to be the only clan playing there that evening. The women did not seem to notice these older guys either if they were playing. During the 7 hours I spent in the café I observed only two girls using computers there; one was checking her email as I walked by, the other was chatting via an MSN Messenger, with no game running in the background. The only other female there was one of the employees, who did not help with technical issues, which were the manager’s domain it seemed. Her role there was to serve snacks and soft drinks from behind the counter, clean tables and wipe screens. I had the opportunity at one point to ask the manager about the scarcity of female gamers when he came over to ask me a few curious questions about my project and to watch the clan play for a little while. I asked him if women came into the café to play games. His answers can be seen in the excerpt from my field notes: He shakes his head: “A few girls come in – not many. One or two are really good. I think they mainly play at home… The girls come to surf the internet… I think they prioritise their money differently. [Buying clothes]” I confront him on this issue, in order to see if this is actual knowledge or just common preconception: “Yeah? I think young Danish males are starting to think about their clothes too?” Manager: (Nods) ”True. There’re a few guys who come in here (shakes his head) they spend 1500 to 1800 kroner11 on a pair of jeans.” 11 Approximately € 200 to €400 at the time. 34 This not only shows that girls seldom come into the café to play and the few that do enter basically surf the net. Additionally it also shows how the manager seems to think that women prefer to spend their money on clothes rather than games. He admits to some young men spending too much money on clothes, and yet those guys still come to play in his café. He did not seem be reflecting on the fact that a girl’s experience of walking into his café might be a little intimidating; being the only women there besides the girl cleaning could be a reason for female gamers not flooding the place. This made me curious about what these professional female players’ first experiences in a cyber café had been like. What did it feel like to enter a space that was dominated by male players young and old? During the interviews I learned that just as in previous studies (Morris 2000, Kerr 2003 and Schott 2004) all of the women had been introduced to the game by their boyfriends or their brothers. Some had been taught to play at a computer at home, while others had their first gaming experience in a cyber café. Tibi was actually the only one who had gone with a female friend the very first time she was in a cyber café rather than being brought along by a male gamer. She recalls the experience12: <Tibi^Tøjvask> […] It was actually quite a long time ago, when ChickZ, the girl clan I ‘gamed13’ in, decided that we should meet. <Tore> Mmm? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Actually think that there was a time before that in our local cyber café in Holte14 […] Yeah that was some experience. <Tore> How so? <Tibi^Tøjvask> everyone stared when I and another girl came in there and said we were going to play <Tore> Yeah? <Tibi^Tøjvask> It was just a completely different world, a lot of boys sitting and staring at their csreens <Tibi^Tøjvask> screens* 12 This is taken from the IRC interview, which can be seen by the < > surrounding the nick’s we used for that session. I have presented the nicks as they were seen on screen, because I believe it also shows how these represent something beyond the mere name of the participant. In this case, as I mentioned in Chapter 2, Tibi was doing laundry during this interview, which is why her nick is followed by the word ’Tøjvask’ meaning just that. 13 She actually uses the English verb ’to game’ here. This is something that I noticed the Danish CS-players at the LAN used too. It’s interesting since there is a Danish word for it ’spille’, but I think that since that also applies to playing board games the computer gamers use the Anglicised verb in order to signify that they’ve moved beyond just board games. 14 Another well off town north of Copenhagen. 35 <Tibi^Tøjvask> and I remember that there were crappy machines <Tibi^Tøjvask> and a very small café <Tore> What did it mean to you to that you were the only girls? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Not really a lot, we were just going to play and people quickly stopped staring and kept on playing themselves. <Tore> Do you still experience staring when you play in cafés? <Tibi^Tøjvask> There’ll always be a little, also because more girls have come on the scene and people probably want to check if it’s someone they know who walks in the door. […] <Tibi^Tøjvask> I also take an extra peek when other girls come in whom I don’t know at first. <Tore> Yeah? <Tibi^Tøjvask> It’s curiosity. <Tibi^Tøjvask> which will never go away <Tibi^Tøjvask> :) Tibi's description of the cyber café was that it was ‘a completely different world’ where ‘guys were staring into screens’ seems to show that she initially felt out of place, but since they were two girls in there together they were able to overcome their initial worries and play a game in there. Indeed taking the first step into a cyber café must be a little intimidating for women. First of all you have to be willing to enter what feels like a different world where no members of your own gender are present. Secondly if there are other women they will probably give you a second look as when they step through the door, as Tibi admits to doing now. Walking into a dark room with anywhere from 10 to 90 people looking up from their screens at you must feel a little eerie. But being a solitary woman in a cyber café did not seem to be a bad experience for any of the women I interviewed though. Artamis told the following anecdote during the group interview: Artamis:15 The first time I was introduced to it, it was my younger brothers, who - I’d just come home from South Africa and then they said: “Hi. We’re going to a cyber café, me and some friends and stuff like that, and you’re coming with us!” “Oh I am?” “Yes you are! Now come on!” Then we went down there and were going to play that Counter-Strike. And I was sitting in 15 A nick in bold indicates a quote from an interview where the informants and I were in the same room. This means that in all these cases the interview data is from the group interview, except where I quote Vildkatten. 36 front of the monitor and then “Fuck…. FUUUUCK what am I supposed to do? Who’re you?” Then I point and there are like tonnes of little boys around me. [Speaks in a soft voice] “Should I buy for you?” [Own voice] “Ok! You do that.” [We all laugh and she continues in her own voice] “Where am I supposed to go?” [Soft voice] “Try to go over there. You’re supposed to shoot that guy.” [Own voice]“Ok!” Duh-duh-duh. Even though it was her brothers who insisted that she should go to the cyber café with them, she actually got help from ’tonnes of little boys’. To me this shows the friendly face of the cyber cafés – a place to hang out after school and teach newbies a thing or two about a game. Artamis got help in the given situation because she was a grown woman, who was not afraid to voice her insecurities about the game in the café – and quite vocally it seems by her language in the situation. Judging by the reaction of the little boys a grown woman must have been quite a rarity in that café. In Muus’s case it was her former boyfriend who brought her along, initially because she was opposed to even going: Muus: I had never gained the interest [in the game] if it wasn’t because I had almost been forced, because I really nagged about even going to a cyber café, how much fun could that be!? Then he said: “The try to come along, for Christ’s sake, instead of just sitting down and being mad about it.” “Well, ok.” So I had to come along. Tore: Do you remember what you had against cyber cafés? Muus: Yeah, I couldn’t understand why he had to spend so much time on it. I thought it was corny, when we could to lots of other fun stuff. Like going out looking at clothes or something. [Everyone chuckles]. That was just so much more fun. I couldn’t see why he had to spend 5 hours at a cyber café on a weekday where we could be sitting at home having dinner together or something. I thought it was completely ridiculous, but then I found out that playing computer games was a hell of a blast. Muus tells in her story of her transition from sceptic to gamer initial cyber café experience that she was ‘almost forced’ into gaming. Tatiana also talked about this being forced into trying the game. These experiences show the resistance that these women might initially have had towards Counter-Strike do not necessarily lie in just the game, but perhaps more so in the game space it was being played in. In Muus’s case it was not even a desire to check out Counter-Strike or a cyber café that got her into gaming, but rather a desire to spend more time with her boyfriend at the time. Now she seems to make fun of her former viewpoint who liked ‘buying clothes’ or ‘having dinner’ rather than having ‘a hell of a blast’ playing computer games. A little of the chuckle being generated at her ironic statement about clothes is reflected in her view of femininity, which she expressed in the IRC-interview later: <Tore_> What is femininity to you? <a4o|muus\\> lol, I’ve never thought about that… in my case I just think it’s about dressing feminine and looking like a girl 37 <Tore_> How do you think, one “looks like a girl”? <a4o|muus\\> puhh, now you’ve gotten me onto thin ice :P <Tore_> That certainly wasn’t intentional;) <a4o|muus\\> well do yourself up a little, walk around in clothes that are aimed at girls etc <Tore_> Ok. Then let me ask, do you feel that you are feminine? <a4o|muus\\> yes, I do <a4o|muus\\> e.g. are pink and baby blue my favourite colours and [I] have a lot of clothes in those colours :D <Tore_> :D <Tore_> Do you experience any problems with uniting femininity and cs? <a4o|muus\\> no not at all Muus’s view of femininity is tied to the visual colour signals sent by women in the clothes they wear, which perhaps made her juxtapose the experience of being in a cyber café with shopping for clothes in her statements earlier. I think this can be seen as a contrast in her perception of gendered activities and what was acceptable to like. Before becoming a gamer she indulged in the feminine activity of shopping rather than the male activity that her ex-boyfriend indulged in, going to the cyber café. Now she feels that she can indulge in both activities though16. During the boot camp session an incident occurred, which I found particularly interesting in terms of gender roles in the cyber café. Just before Team-A4O began playing the first of their practice games a young man came by and began asking questions. Artamis nodded towards me and told him to ”Talk to our manager”, which made the other women chuckle - so much for unobtrusiveness. He then turned to me and asked, ”Which one is Tati?” I felt that it would be unnatural not to tell him, since I did know who she was. Wouldn’t a manager know who was who in a clan? Yet, although I didn’t really feel comfortable pointing towards Tatiana, I felt that it would be the most natural thing to do in the situation17. He then proceeded to ask her for her autograph, and while looking at the monitor she demanded to know what he wanted it for. He just smiled and asked what she thought autographs normally are for. She smiled a little crookedly at this and mumbled something about how people normally got paid for that. He didn’t really 16 I do think that this may have been a methodological mistake on my part, since I could probably have gotten a more detailed response from Muus here if I had asked the question more openly i.e. ”How do you unite being feminine with playing Counter-Strike?” 17 I think that if I had told him that he would have to ask the women directly they might actually have thought that I was an annoyance to have along, since answering a simple question normally is not that hard a task. 38 seem to hear this though as he had apparently given up on getting the autograph just then. All through this brief conversation she hardly looked at him. He did come back later, when they were playing, pounded one hand on his chest and loudly proclaimed several times that “Uh-uh. Uh-uh!” When she briskly demanded to know what he was moaning about he said “You’re hurting me! You’re hurting me!” while he pounded a hand against his heart. When he finally left the café a few hours later he tapped me on the shoulder and said that I should get her autograph for him and leave it at the counter, which indicated to me that he had some sort of affiliation to the café, but I couldn’t say whether he was an employee who was just there hanging out or just one of the regulars. I think the incident with the ‘autograph hunter’ exemplifies that men and women were not quite equal in this gaming space. The young man should have noticed that Tatiana was slightly uncomfortable with his request to begin with as she mainly looked at the screen when he was addressing her, yet he insisted on being a bit more aggressive in attempting to get the autograph from her. The pounding of his heart and his hint that she was hurting him show that he is almost flirting with her to get her autograph. Also he didn’t really seem humble at all when he demanded the autograph; his questions seemed almost like commands. The Cyber Café as a Social Space However not all the odds seemed to be against the ladies in this place. Later in the evening a young man walked in whom Tatiana seemed to know. She greeted him with a hug and they spent some time talking when she had a break from the practice games. I was in no position to hear anything they said, but they seemed to be conversing as normal friends do. In fact friendships do matter when it comes to playing Counter-Strike in cafés: <Tore_> Why did you keep playing Counter-Strike after your brothers brought you to a cyber café the first time? <a4o|Artamis> I had a good friend who also played, and when I moved to Århus and got internet we made a clan. Everyone in the clan knew each other and were the same age so we had it damn fun when we played <Tore_> So it meant a lot to have a circle of friends who were into it too <a4o|Artamis> yes I thought so […] <a4o|Artamis> I don’t think that I would have continued if e.g. my friend had not played <Tore_> Ok. Why not? […] 39 <a4o|Artamis> it was a thing we had together, if no one I knew had the game then I probably couldn’t be bothered [to play] either Artamis emphasises her dependence on a social circle of friends who ‘knew each other and had the same age’, which I believe shows how important it is for players of a multi-player game like Counter-Strike to be able to get along with the others that they play with. During the interviews Team-A4O and Vildkatten all talked about this on several occasions indicating that if you’re to be ‘bothered’ to keep coming back to a cyber café with your friends you all need to be able to get along socially. A final albeit small thing that struck me about the physical space of the cyber café was that it had three bathrooms, but none of them had any logo or writing on them indicating whether they were for men or for women, which is the norm in the vast majority cafés – not cyber cafés – in Copenhagen and it’s suburbs. Did this mean anything to the women, when they were there? <Tore|Away> [...] When you Boot Camped at Playtown I was stuck by the fact that there were no men’s and women’s bathrooms. What do you think about that? <a4o|NisseP^away> ohhh welll.....I suppose you could say that not many girls come there ..but when they do have 3 bathrooms they could make one a girl’s bathroom....would’ve made it a little more hygienic for us girls..among other things they have that at net-x in Roskilde18 <a4o|NisseP^away> but [I] don’t think they’ve split it up at boomtown19 either To me this seemed to show a slightly unintended ‘markedness’ of this space as a male space that Cassell and Jenkins (see Chapter 2). NissePigen says that it’s unhygienic for the women, indicating that she feels that a toilet space used almost exclusively by men is unclean. Summary In the section above I attempted to show how cyber cafés to a large degree can be regarded as gendered game spaces where the activities that take place there are also perceived by the participants as leaning more towards male than female activities. The striking absence of female gamers in the space makes it intimidating for women to initially enter a cyber café and the initial scrutiny from all the other players in there is something a woman must overcome if she wants to participate in the space, although if she does enter and plays she may get help from male players in learning the ropes of playing Counter-Strike. However, women could possibly be approached by male regulars who are looking for a little attention from them. This may cause some women to have reservations about playing the games in the cyber cafés, and unfortunately the gendering 18 Net-x is a cyber café that sponsors Team-A4O 19 BoomTown is often seen as the cyber café by gamers in Copenhagen, although since it’s a franchise there are also BoomTown cafés in Århus, Odense and Ålborg , the largest towns in Denmark after Copenhagen. 40 of the cyber cafés, inadvertent as it may be, is also keeping women away from the social activities that take place there. LAN Events Although the competitive aspect of gaming is present during boot camps in cyber cafés the stakes at LAN events and tournaments are much higher because this is where clans can win prizes – big cash prizes on some occasions. These events often last several days and/or evenings/nights where Counter-Strike clans may play three or more games a day. The Danish LAN-scene is strikingly similar to the Australasian LAN scene described by Swallwell (2004), which means that the events are often run by a few individuals and are not-for-profit events. In the following section I will be taking a look at LAN events and show how these are indeed gendered game spaces (Bryce & Rutter 2002: 250) again, not necessarily because the organisers want to keep women out, but rather in the way the space is structured without thinking about gender. PlayedLAN, the event I attended in September 2004 was held in a closed-down factory, which is owned by a Danish ISP, who also sponsored the internet connection for the event. The closeddown factory was in the industrial quarter of a suburb in western Copenhagen. Since participants were required to bring their own computers, monitors, mattresses and sleeping bags for the three-day event, the only way to get there was by car. This meant that parents were driving many of the participants who were under 18. I immediately noticed a fair number of men and women in their 40’s driving these cars loading off their teenage sons and their friends and then driving off again. Aside from the 5 women of A4O there were no female gamers at the event out of 29 competing teams in the Counter-Strike competition – the main attraction for the event with cash prizes going to the top five teams. All in all that meant that there were 140 male gamers to 5 women, which comes out to roughly a 3%-4% female representation. This included boys as young as 11 or 12, teenage boys up to men in their mid 30’s. The majority of the male gamers were probably in their mid teens to early 20’s though. I spotted only three other women at the event when it was up and running: one was tending the bar/snack stall, and two others came by to hang out with their boyfriends for a while. All the officials, the organisers themselves, the technical support staff and the administrators, called admins, were male. Because of the age spread of the gamers the organisers gave wristbands to all the participants. Anyone under 18 was given an orange wristband while the over 18’s were given green wristbands, allowing them to buy beers from the ’bar’. When getting a wristband you would have to show identification in order to get a green band they’d announced. In my opinion the wristbands are a visual example of how the organisers had thought of a difference factor 41 separating the gamers at the event. A difference that could have legal consequences for them if they did not have a system in place to make sure that minors were not in a position to purchase alcohol. The question was if similar considerations were in place for the tiny minority of female participants. The wristband situation had to do with the law after all, but the other conventions of the game space would probably have their roots in norms. All the gaming was to take place in a huge room with a concrete floor and few windows. The organisers had set up rows of plywood tables with network hubs and power supplies. White plastic chairs were provided for the participants to sit in. I’ve included a photo from the gaming hall below. The entrance hall of the place had been refurbished with a long interim desk covered with black cloth. Behind this desk were the snack bar and the admin area. Additionally they had set up a projector that would be showing some of the games being played at the tournament on a huge white wall. Shot 1 from the LAN – A4O were sitting at the back under the big banner, where they had placed their own smaller banner underneath. 42 I noticed that Team All 4 One had brought a number of ‘trophies’ along with them along with their computers and sleeping bags. These trophies turned out function almost like territorial markings of the section they were seated in during the LAN. They had brought along their ‘official’ laminated sign from the ESWC, for which Tibi asked me to get some duct-tape so they could hang it up on the wall behind them. Tibi also showed me the giant fake cheque they received at that tournament. I was allowed to listen to a rap that a male gamer had made especially for A4O for the clan’s first anniversary. I noticed that both Muus and Tibi were mouthing the words to the rap while they were either chatting on IRC or playing practice games before the actual competition was to start the following day. As the final icing on the Team A4O’s ‘Official’ sign from ESWC with both sponsor logo from NVDIA and the Danish flag. cake they also covered the backs of the white plastic chairs with their sponsored t-shirts. I take this as the clan being very proud of their achievements since they are very eager to display them when they play in public spaces. Also the rap indicates a strong support from parts of the male community. I noticed that only a few of the male clans had banners. For instance ‘Fearsome’ had a spray painted cloth banner hanging near ‘their’ section, however none of the other teams that were at the LAN had brought along nearly as many trophies to put on display. This made me think that the trophies in a way symbolise the team emphasising their right to be there, although Tibi claimed in an online interview before the event that there was no pressure just because they were women: [Interviewer] Do you feel any “pressure” by being the only girl clan to be found at Played LAN? ;) [Tibi] No I wouldn’t say that. After all, we’ve tried this so many times before that we don’t really mind (http://www.played.dk/2795) It’s interesting that the interviewer feels the need to add quotation marks around pressure and adds a wink after the question has been asked. I read this as him being a little uncomfortable asking a question which has to do with gender, since the quotation marks show him marking the word as either ironic or with reservations. The wink at the end indicates that he’s asking the question light-heartedly. Tibi’s answer shows that their experiences of being women at LAN events are the norm for them is a good indication that the female to male gamer ratio I mentioned above is not uncommon. 43 Aside from the trophies Muus, Artamis and NissePigen had brought along little stuffed animals that served as mascots. I didn’t see any of the male gamers there with mascots, so this little detail was unique to the women. At one time NissePigen had a see through plastic bag, which contained a small hand mirror not only a huge amount of cables for her computer. These are little indicators that the women of Team-A4O are not attempting to completely blend into the male space at the LAN. There are in fact small differences in what they bring to the event aside from the essential gaming and sleeping equipment. The LAN As A Gendered Game Space Just as the cyber cafés can be considered to be male dominated game spaces I also saw several factors that indicated to me that a typical LAN-event was in fact a male-biased gaming space. For instance when it came to the bathroom facilities here, the organisers had set up three stalls outside with non-flushing toilets. I noticed the women complain about them being disgusting so I decided to ask Tibi about them during our interview: <Tibi^Tøjvask> At the [LAN] you attended they were really terrible, and yeah not really me, so it was good that us girls were allowed to use the indoor ones later. […] There’s probably a little too much Holte-girl20 over me when it comes to that. <Tore> Hehe. What do you mean by Holte-girl. <Tibi^Tøjvask> Hehe yeah. I am probably too used to things being proper, so outdoor toilets are not me at all or sleeping on a concrete floor <Tibi^Tøjvask> Even though I wouldn’t describe myself as a snob, there are just certain things I don’t really appreciate. The organisers took pity on the women and they were allowed to use the indoor bathrooms the owners of the building had in their offices. However is was not only the toilet facilities that position the space in a more male camp, but Tibi being a ’Holte-girl’ doesn’t really appreciate the dust or the poor sleeping facilities. But how does that translate into femininity? Later in the interview when we talked about femininity she told me: <Tore> […]Do you feel that you can be feminine, when you’re at a LAN like Played? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Yes, I’d think so. <Tibi^Tøjvask> But I still don’t like sleeping on the floor under the pc <Tibi^Tøjvask> so it suits me fine that we [Tibi and Artamis] went home and slept in the evening21 20 The reason I laughed at this (’Hehe’) is because a Holte-girl is an idiom in Denmark representing an uptight and posh stereotypical rich girl. Since this is not normally a badge women want to wear I found it funny in Tibi’s case. But I also wanted to know what her view of this was, and hence I asked for her definition of it. 44 <Tibi^Tøjvask> That’s probably my feminine side shining through. <Tore> :) What is it you don’t like about sleeping on the floor under the pc? <Tibi^Tøjvask> It’s just not me, sleeping in a big hall with who knows who snoring and farting and what do I know, no that will never do it for me. <Tibi^Tøjvask> Waking up with morning hair and having to run about there <Tibi^Tøjvask> no <Tibi^Tøjvask> I’d like to take a bath and stuff like that in the morning Here we clearly see how the game space conflicts with Tibi’s likes and dislikes as a woman. She doesn’t initially think the space disallows for her to be feminine, but she does admit to not being comfortable in a large room with many strangers who ’snore and fart’ and without facilities that help her feel good about herself. She realises that in order to play Counter-Strike in this space she must discard those comforts, but being given the chance she was glad that she could sleep at home during the night. Another thing that made the LAN space default to male in my view was the lack of any separate room for the girls to change in. When competing Team All 4 One wear t-shirts with a sponsor logo. In this case it was their black shirts sponsored by Watt Energy Drink. However Muus was not wearing one just before the first game was to take place, so she had to change inside the factory hall. This mean that Tatiana had to hold up a t-shirt that Muus could discreetly change behind. I see this as an indication of the fact that LAN events are primarily thought of as boy’s spaces and since girls normally don’t participate it probably never occurred to the organisers that it might be prudent to have separate bathrooms and separate changing rooms for the female participants. In fact this issue of the LAN-event as a gendered space has consequences for the gendered composition of top Counter-Strike clans in Denmark: Artamis: It also has something to do with that there are not that many boys who believe girls can play and for example [...] your really good friends, those from GK, I don’t really think that any of them have a clue that I really can play, actually. And GK used to be one of the best clans in Denmark. They’ve had some player changes and they’ve taken people in, who you never really knew of and who haven’t been really good – and then they’ve sat and trained them. But they would never, never ever if I’d played at least as well as the guy they took in, they would never have asked me for example. Tore: No? 21 Because of technical problems at the LAN event that ended up postponing the Counter-Strike tournament most of Team-A4O were without network connections until late in the morning the following day, so Artamis and Tibi decided the night before to return to their flats in Copenhagen to sleep there and return the next day. 45 Artamis: No. Because they don’t believe you can play. And I also believe that boys, if it ultimately is a top clan, then I don’t believe they want a girl player in because the social – that, what do they do if they’re going off to events and stuff like that and they have a girl with them? What do they do with her? Put her in the same bed as one of the boys. I don’t think they think about it that way at all. You can’t do that. Artamis indicates that the male gamers perceive the actual gaming activity of being a top Counter-Strike player as being a male exclusive activity. They would ’never, never’ ask a woman to join their clan because of the gendering of LAN-spaces. Also Artamis emphasises that the social aspect of a top clan is tied to the game space they’re since you can’t put a girl in the ’same bed’. These issues are quite common when it comes to letting women into men’s only clubs in society at large. When it comes to competitive gaming it really does not require that much of the event organisers to set up a small separate section for female gamers at events in huge factory buildings, however it would require that the events had regular female players and that there were more of them. Thus the lack of pressure Tibi mentioned above comes from experience. When first entering the LAN or tournament space the experience can feel like a lot of pressure as Vildkatten when she was the first woman ever to play in the European CPL a few years ago. She had travelled with her clan, where she was the only woman to play in a CPL tournament in Berlin: Vildkatten: Back in 2002 [...] there was an extreme amount of focus when a girl was playing and suddenly there was a girl down at the CPL playing. It’s got nothing to do with me as a person it was just that I was female and playing with the guys, and that caused an extreme amount of spot light to come my way. And playing, you’re damn nervous enough already. You know there is double pressure for a girl. One thing is that you want to deliver a good presentation, but you also know that there are 500 guys in the back, and they’re just waiting for you to fail, so that they can say ”What did I say? It’s a girl she doesn’t know how to play CS.” So there’s a kind of double pressure on you. In Vildkatten’s experience there was a double pressure for her in not only having to play in the CPL, but also being a woman playing in the CPL. She feels that 500 spectators are waiting for her to fail. Had she been a male gamer she would probably not have had the ’spot light’ on her because of the rarity of female Counter-Strike players at the time. Luckily for her in the actual game she managed to pull off a very spectacular win for the team she was on. This obviously made her proud: Vildkatten: Not only for me but also for [the team]. It is a team game. But it was also my personal achievement which I was amazingly happy about because, holy cow, I’d just disproved all the boys watching! Those that were thinking, “Yeah, yeah. It’s a girl and she’s probably going to die.” And then she makes it anyway. It’s also a little to show that us girls can damn well too. So even though I don’t like the fact that [competitive tournaments are] segregated by gender I also want to show that girls are also capable in order to break down the guy’s prejudices and to say “We can play on an equal level with you.” Although she emphasises the team aspect of the game, Vildkatten’s statement also shows that the personal victories at a tournament with hundreds of spectators watching has a profound effect 46 on your self-esteem as a player. She is ambiguous about accepting this personal victory because earlier in the interview she had stated that she didn’t see the point of Counter-Strike being divided into male and female divisions,22 but here she is celebrating a personal victory partially on behalf of her clan, but mostly on behalf of her gender. However, Vildkatten’s battle back then may not have struck a chord with many male gamers in Denmark, as my brief talk with Shai, one of A4O’s male managers, at the LAN-event showed. He told me that unlike some the other female teams at the ESWC A4O received very little support from the Titans the Danish team who won the male competition at that tournament. For instance the Chinese men came out to cheer on the Chinese women when they played. In an online interview Artamis comments on the lack of support: [Interviewer]That Denmark ran away with first place in both Counter-Strike tournaments is impressive. How was the solidarity between the two teams during the event? [Artamis]Disappointing. I think it’s a shame that 2 Danish teams can’t stick together during one event; I think at the end that our patriotic feelings came up in all of us and that brought us a little closer. I have to say thanks to Rom and Onsberg for the good backup around us, but we didn’t see or hear much of the players themselves from [the Titans] (Christensen 2004). So even though the two Danish teams had a chance to socialise and support each other at the event it was only the other team’s managers who took this opportunity, which made Artamis ’disappointed’. As the situation is right now the perception of gaming as a male activity among the top gamers and the gendered space of the LAN seem to be two vital barriers for women achieving equity in competitive Counter-Strike. However, the painting of LAN events with regards to female players I’ve painted so far has been bleak to say the least, but of course there are good reasons for TeamA4O showing up at these events to play, despite the gender odds being against them. Supporters and Socialisation at LANs At the LAN event I noticed on several occasions that there were very courteous male gamers at these events too, who seem very supportive of Team-A4O. When they arrived the guys helped them carry their computers into the game hall. One member of the formerly reclusive Titans actually carried Tatiana's computer for her and came over several times to chat with her. He did not seem to be engaging in flirtatious activities like the ’autograph hunter’ at the cyber café at any time. Also after the girls lost the game I watched them play by just one round they were outside getting a little air. One man in his late teens or early twenties came up to Muus and said something along the lines of: ”Man that was close! Before the game I’d told the admins that they should show 22 Read more about the ambiguity of male and female divisions in the section on ’Stars and Starfuckers’ on p. 64ff 47 your game, because your two clans were the most evenly matched and that would’ve made an excellent game to watch on the big screen!” His statement shows that not only does he respect the women for being able to play ’an excellent game’, but he also shows that he has prior knowledge of their gaming abilities since he claimed to have told the admins to show the game on the projector inside. The support for the team is also shown, as I mentioned earlier, by the rap that was made for them on their anniversary and the LAN-event gives them the opportunity to share this with even more people. I even noticed a couple of guys quote the rap when talking to the girls: ”Muus is the ninja!” indicating that the rap was indeed an homage heard not only by A4O, but by members of the CScommunity as well. Also there is Counter-Strike itself, which at the competitive level is very exciting to watch. In the game I watched A4O play they lost the first half 2-13, and thus had to win 13 rounds in the second half to beat the other clan. As I watched them get closer and closer to their goal my hands were shaking and my pulse was speeding up and it was very difficult for me to write when the score was 12-2. Unfortunately they just lost the final round and were unable to tie it. I had the opportunity to observe their opponents play too, as I could just manage to sneak behind them. Their tactical language was very similar to A4O’s with one notable exception. They referred to the women’s game avatars as ’she’ and ’her’ even though the in-game representation of the avatars was male. This seems to be a strong indication that the context surrounding the game has an important influence on how you perceive the content. Even though the men were seeing male avatars they knew they were playing against women. Finally, even though there is a tournament with prizes to be won the LAN-event also seems to be a space where you socialise with your clan and meet other clans. During the long wait for the network to get properly up and running the girls were having a beer with their mates or m8’s as they’re termed on the Counter-Strike scene, playing games casually like Bejewelled or the arcade classic Bubble Bobble23. When these games were being played the women were more aware of the people surrounding them and were often laughing or joking about something while playing. I could see that the women of Team-A4O were really an accepted part of the social community at the event. While there were a few people they knew in the cyber café where they boot camped, there were many more here, which gave the event the air of a get-together rather than a competition per se. 23 Bejewelled is an online puzzle game with game mechanics similar to Tetris or Columns. BubbleBobble was an arcade hit in the 80’s where you controlled a little dinosaur or monster who blew bubbles to trap enemies and when the dinosaur popped such a bubble the monster would ’die’. The game featured 100 levels and was immensely popular because of its collaborative two-player mode. 48 Professionalism At the end of the day however Team-A4O were at the LAN event at the expense of their sponsors, which meant that they actually got the admission to the event paid and they were in a competition where the winners could go home with 10.000 Danish Kroner24. While they didn’t win any cash prizes at the LAN they did bring back $10.000 from the ESWC. Also they were playing using all different sorts of sponsored equipment, which they brought to the LAN. During the group interview when they were talking about their winnings and their sponsorships: Tibi: [...] Sometimes I sit at home and think ”That’s funny. My speakers, I’ve gotten those from a sponsor. My keyboard, I’ve gotten from a sponsor. I have a mouse, I’ve gotten from a sponsor, the mouse pad is also from a sponsor.” I feel like, ”Hmm, what did I buy here myself?” Despite the prizes and the sponsorships Team-A4O do not see themselves as being professional players, with the exception of Tatiana who is the only one who equates the many hours she puts into the game and the money she wins with professionalism. Muus has a different opinion: <Tore_> What does it mean to you that there is money involved when you’re playing at tournaments? <a4o|muus\\> nothing in the game, if you think about it you might as well not play <Tore_> Why is that? <a4o|muus\\> For me it’s just an extra bonus, but really the cool thing is showing that you’re the best <a4o|muus\\> if you think about the money it shifts your focus and you loose your concentration more easily <Tore_> You want to be number one? <a4o|muus\\> yes <Tore_> Do you see yourself as a professional CS-player? <a4o|muus\\> no not at all, I see it as a hobby, where I get to live out some dreams and have fun <Tore_> But you are sponsored. <a4o|muus\\> yes we are sponsored, but it’s not something I can make a living off. The sponsorships just make it easier to get to tournaments, and it’s always the tournaments that are the fun, what you train for. Although Muus does not see her self as a ’professional player’ since she cannot make a living off playing the game, I still maintain that her attitude towards the game shows professionalism. She is focused when she plays as she doesn’t think about the cash prizes, she has a very clear ambition 24 2nd place gave 5,000 DKR and the last prize-winning place was 5th with 1,000 DKR. 49 of being number one, and she is willing to put both time and effort into practicing so she can get to the tournaments the ’fun’ part of playing Counter-Strike at this level according to her. Summary I have attempted to show how the social structures at LANs and the tournaments that take place there are biased towards the male gamers. Just as with the cyber cafés the LANs are massively dominated by the presence of male gamers, where however with the introduction of female tournaments there is a slight shift in the gender balance. Unfortunately the creation of female leagues and tournaments is not welcomed by all male gamers or even female gamers who claim that since Counter-Strike is a computer game there are no physical advantages or disadvantages to being male or female. I think these players are overlooking the fact that the game spaces in which the clans practice these games have an inherent male dominance. However LANs do also provide a space in which the women can socialise with their male friends, and the excitement of competition and tournament play is a big draw for the women who get a chance for personal and team-based victories. Domestic Gaming Whereas the LAN events represent both a social space for getting together with other gamers and a competitive space for tournaments the domestic game space is where Team All 4 One spend the most hours practicing the game. As I mentioned in the introduction the women spend more than 20 hours a week practicing Counter-Strike here and thus this space also has an integral influence on their experiences with regard to the game. In this section I will attempt to show how this space is also gendered with regards to gaming hardware and ownership, and also how their non-gaming female friends view the activity of gaming. Owning a Gaming Computer One experience that several of the women experienced at home was an initial male dominance of the computer at home and how they had to negotiate for play time on the hardware corresponding to the findings of Schott & Horrell (2000) and Kerr (2003). The fact that males dominate the gaming hardware in the domestic sphere has been experienced by three of the players. When Tibi got into the game and began putting more hours into it she initially played on her ex-boyfriend’s computer: <a4o|Tibi> I began by playing a little on his pc when he wasn’t at home and that didn’t go especially well. That was also on a 56K modem at the time, which didn’t make things much easier. So after a while my boyfriend at the time didn’t think it was fun that I’d be sitting with his pc when he wanted to play too, so he put together a machine from his discarded bits :) <Tore> :D And then you could play full time? 50 <a4o|Tibi> I could at least play when I had the time and I wanted to and I was at his place. Tibi’s experience shows that she would loose the negotiation about who got to use the actual equipment for play when they both wanted to, since it was his computer. She could only play when he wasn’t in. Additionally the equipment she was given to play on as her own was built from bits and pieces that he was done using from his ’discarded’ equipment. Tatiana also told me that she was given her brother’s old computer when she really got into gaming. When NissePigen began playing Counter-Strike at home in a small network with her ex-boyfriend and his brother she initially had a disappointing experience: <Tore|Away> During the last interview you told that it was an ex-boyfriend who introduced you to CS, is that right? <a4o|NisseP^away> Yeah more or less... <a4o|NisseP^away> But it was because of him I began to play online :) <Tore|Away> You didn’t play online before that? <a4o|NisseP^away> Though [I] can’t really remember when I saw the game for the first time or tried it for the first time. <Tore|Away> Ok. <a4o|NisseP^away> Had played it [on] LAN with him and his little brother before we got internet and played online <a4o|NisseP^away> But that was only a couple of times because I didn’t really think it was that fun then. <Tore|Away> Why not? <a4o|NisseP^away> Think it was because the computer I used was so bad that you didn’t hit what you shot at... And normally you also have to learn how to play a game before it becomes real fun. NissePigen’s experience clearly highlights how women are at the bottom of the computer food chain when playing games in the domestic sphere. It is as if she receives the leftover computer without even being asked to switch once in a while. However at a point she had the need for her own computer: <Tore|Away> When did you have a need to have your own computer that could run CS? <a4o|NisseP^away> after having played online for almost a year and was tired of fighting with my boyfriend at the time over the computer and that he always messed with it so it never worked. This seems to underline the belief that computers are first and foremost boy’s toys and since it takes NissePigen almost a year to get the need of having her own gaming system. However NissePigen was also the only one who told me of going to LAN-parties in high school. At these 51 events she would borrow one of the boys’ computers to play on because her own computer was not fast enough back then either. So despite her having an active gaming history she always seemed to be in situations where she could borrow a system. It was not until she became so engaged in Counter-Strike that the negotiations about borrowing a computer became too bothersome for her. Non-gaming Women’s Reactions Another factor I came across was the view of gamers as being solitary geeks. Spending many hours at home playing computer games had an effect on how these women were viewed by some female friends and relatives. They found it difficult to understand why one would spend this much time sitting at home. That was until they won the first prize at the ESWC and the media exposure that came along with that. <Tore> How do your female friends respond to you playing CS? <a4o|tatiana> They still call me a nerd and get annoyed that I’m at home in front of the computer instead of meeting up with them. But I won 10000$ with my clan at the ESWC, it’s easier to accept that I spend so much time gaming :] Tatiana’s experience is one of being a nerd and having to struggle with the demands of playing Counter-Strike at this level seem on a collision course. Although to me it seems that she is implying that the acceptance she gets from her friends is tied to the fact that she has won money by playing the game. Had she not won Tatiana would probably have faced a less understanding group of friends. Muus tells a similar tale about how her sister changed her attitude towards Muus’ gaming activities: Muus: [...] My sister was very much at the time, ”Get home from the planet you’re living on” and stuff like that. And is just completely, different from me, and loves to go to a café with her friends and is always out. And I’m just in front of my computer having to practice. And down in France Morning P325, I think it was, called [and asked] if I couldn’t do an interview later. Yeah, yeah [I could...] It’s really funny. And I did that interview and she’d been sitting in the car and then [shouting] ”NO NO! THAT’S MY SISTER!” and people from her work had called her and told her ”It sounded soo much like you” ”No that’s my sister!” And after that she has become a little more understanding about it. And there was the fact that we won the money and stuff. Here we see how Muus’ non-gaming sister who is ’completely’ different from her is shocked to hear her sister on the radio because she had been spending hours practicing something which is ’from another planet’. Furthermore it is an example of how these women achieve empowerment and respect through gaming at the level that they do. Muus’ sister shifts from regarding the activity as something silly into telling her co-workers proudly about her. I think the above examples really illustrate just how much you have to achieve as a gamer in order to be accepted by 25 A popular morning show on Danish national radio 52 your non-gaming friends. However that accept does seem to empower these women in their social spheres because of the coverage they receive from the mass media Summary Even gaming at home can be a gendered activity where the male gamers own the computer system and hence have the final say in who gets to play and who doesn’t. Instead of sharing their systems they relegate the women to lesser machines that make the game play experience less entertaining. However it is strange that the women who had this problem didn’t just buy their own gaming systems to play on. I believe I could have looked closer into this issue however, because my data shows no clear evidence of why they didn’t. Also along with struggling with male opinions of Counter-Strike female gamers have to deal with stigmatisation as ’geeks’ or beings from ’another planet’. However by playing the game at the level they do Team A4O make the news in mass-media which in turn empowers these women to a great degree in their female social networks and in effect tones down the whole geek perception of them as gamers. 53 4 O N L IN E G A M E S PA C E S A C T IV I TIE S AND The online game spaces in which Counter-Strike is played have values that are in part based on what the code in these spaces allows you to do as a participant. Whereas in the offline spaces it is fairly obvious to the male participants when a woman enters the space, the same does not hold true for the online spaces. These spaces do not necessarily have a direct connection to the game itself. The many IRC channels where gamers meet to find games, check the latest results or to chat have not been produced by Valve or Sierra to enhance the game experience. Instead they are separate cyber spaces that are decentralised from the game itself. Also the Danish gaming sites that have Counter-Strike tournament related information are not owned in any way or form by these companies. They are run as separate spaces, which may have commercial interests in the players of the game, such as XplayN.dk, a sub domain under Boomtown, the cyber café franchise I mentioned in Chapter 3. Others such as Played.dk or CSWeb.dk are non-profit gamer run sites that produce news and results from the European Counter-Strike scene. I want to stress that although Counter-Strike is an online game it is very dependent on server pings that can make a game highly unbalanced if one clan has a much lower ping than the other, since this makes them able to spot their opponents’ in-game avatars much quicker than their opponents spot them. In fact, all the women except Vildkatten26 seem to orient themselves towards the Danish CS-scene and the Danish players there. They do however mention Swedish or German clans from time to time. This means that in essence when I am talking about the Counter-Strike scene in these online spaces it relates entirely to European clans and mostly to experiences the women have from playing games against Danish clans or online experiences involving Danish male players. Inside the Game Space On the Danish Counter-Strike scene you are known by your gaming alias – your nick. This corresponds to the screen name Lessig (1999) describes in AOL, but the nick is used as an identifier both on the IRC channels, on Counter-Strike related forums or websites and in the 26 Vildkatten used to work for CPL-Europe as a reporter and through that got to travel a lot and meet gamers from all over Europe, which is probably why she orients herself more towards the European scene than the Danish scene. 54 game itself. All these spaces allow you to have multiple identities just as AOL, which also means that the women have chosen their own nicks. I was curious to what the motivation behind their choice of nick was, and if it had anything to do with allowing them to act in different roles as Lessig (1999) describes. In this section I will show how both nicks and the clan name ‘All 4 One’ can be used to signal gender neutrality, and the reasons why the women may feel the need to do just that. Vildkatten (The Wildcat) and Muus (Mouse27) were the women’s actual real life nicknames that the women brought into the online spaces. In Vildkatten’s case, it was her brothers gave who gave her the nickname. Muus had been called ‘Mus’ by her dad since she was little. NissePigen (The GnomeGirl) was ’given’ her name in one of the casual clans she used to play in, where there was a NisseFar (GnomeDad) and a NisseDreng (GnomeBoy) so she was ”obviously” NissePigen. Tatiana is the only one whose nick is actually her real name – although on IRC and in the clan she often goes by the short form Tati. She claims she wasn’t as creative as the other girls, and thus didn’t have a ‘cool’ nick. I did not get the chance to ask Artamis about her nick, but it is very similar to Artemis, the Ancient Greek goddess of hunting – definitely a name that signifies strength and power. Tibi is the only one of them who actually chose a nick for a reason that has to do with gender bias: <Tore> How did you make up your own nick? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Well it’s actually a long story. But I began by being called Stinna (short for [my real name]) but got away from that very quickly, since I would prefer being called something that did not symbolise that I was a girl. One of my friend(s) from irc said that he would find a good nick for me and suggested a couple, among them Tibi. In Latin I think it means something with a person who can give love, or something along those lines. So I <Tibi^Tøjvask> really liked that hehe :) <Tibi^Tøjvask> And so have been called that since. I view the uses of nicks sort of like a mask not only can they hide your gender identity if you choose, but they can also be masks that show what you’re doing at the moment. Tibi is washing clothes above. At the LAN event one of the women was gaming as ‘[Nick] | a4o * hates gaynet’ showing her frustration with the technical problems and delays at the event, since something ‘gay’ is considered something negative28. The nicks actually function as the players’ real names within the game space both online, but more surprisingly to me, offline too. I noticed this first when the girls were talking about some of the other players on the Counter-Strike scene: “StarHydra” or 27 Mouse in Danish is actually spelt ’Mus’ but Muus told me she misspelled it one of the first time she played online and that version of the nick stuck. 28 I’ll be discussing the homophobic discourse later in this chapter. 55 “Ref”. This means that you get to dub yourself within the Counter-Strike community. Your experiences may cause you to change your nick, but I get the feeling that you should do it quite early in your ’CS-career’ since people will call you by your nick and not your real name. In some cases, like Tibi’s, you can actually use it to hide your gender. The fact that all the women are known on the scene actually forces them to play with what they call ’fake nicks’ when playing games online. In essence they have lost the initial anonymity the nick provides when playing online. Instead they use ‘fake nicks’ both for themselves and their clan, since the consequences can be quite unnerving: Muus: I remember just after ESWC. You see, sometimes we play using fake nicks where we play under some odd clan names like chowowow or sodavand, and then we have some weird nick so people don’t know who we are. And then [they ask] – it was on dust2, right? Then they [our opponents] ask us: ”Who are you really?” because they were getting their asses prreeety beaten up. And then we changed to our real nick Team A4O blah, blah, blah, blah. And then it came... ”Whores!” and ”Sow” and ”Don’t goddamn think that you are something just because you are girls!” and stuff like that. And then I wrote to them: ”You are exactly the type of clan that forces us to fake nick. Because we simply don’t want to hear that every time we have to play a PCW29. We don’t wanna hear it.” The male gamers begin harassing the women after they take off their masks and show their ‘real’ online faces, which in Muus’ case would be ‘Team A4O | muus’ and it echoes the experiences of the female Quake players surveyed by Morris (2000). In the example above Muus stands up for herself, but her reaction also shows that this is something they have experienced before. All the women mentioned that they had gotten tougher when it came to dealing with this type of harassment online. Either they quickly leave servers or IRC channels where they experience it, or they put people on their ‘ignore lists’ in their IRC clients, which blocks these individuals from sending them text-messages. Here we see how the code of the online tools actually allows for them to escape harassment quite quickly. Nonetheless, it still leaves an impact on them if it happens consecutively and I was frankly quite embarrassed at how some young males in Denmark speak to females in online communities as seen the example below where the women retell an experience from playing an official game: Tibi: […] They dissed us all through the match and then we took screenshots and took demos and we sent it to the admins and they looked through it, and then they could see that it was not really good […] Tore: But what types of comments did you get in that match, do you remember? Artamis: Do you really want to know that? Tore: Very much. 29 Practice Clan War, meaning that two clans are actually playing each other, but the results are not counted officially anywhere. 56 Artamis: Repulsive pig, sow, shitty hag, shit whore, whore. Tatiana: You have to remember that these are 12-13 year-old boys who have just learnt some no-no words in their class Tibi: And yeah, who think they are really great at CS and then they are suddenly whooped and then, goddamn it, hell just breaks loose right? Artamis: And then you get it all Muus: Yeah the most disgusting thing is when they write I hope you get raped and bla bla bla. Tibi: Yeah, but the other stuff you can just shut out, but if you play five games and in all of the games they shoot off those types of comments, then the last game you play then you just begin not being able to concentrate on the game any more, but you just begin to puke over of those boys. Now harsh language is one thing, but the level of the threats these women are facing is exceedingly harsh and misogynous. Even though they were able to get the ‘boys’ banned from the XplayN ladder, which shows that the older males, i.e. the admins, do not approve of such things, it did leave an impression on them; especially when the insults turn towards rape. This means that the harassment can in some cases reach a level where it even affects their ability to play the game properly. The women may loose their concentration because of the threats and want to ‘puke’. Team All 4 One have existed for a little more than a year, and they told me that was quite a feat on the Danish girl scene. Perhaps one of the reasons many girl teams fail or female players are only briefly on the scene is to be found in threats from the younger males, like the ones above. They may in some cases be immature 12 or 13-year olds, but you can’t see that through the in-game text or in the IRC channels only by looking at their profiles at their clan webpage for instance. The male gamers trash talk each other too on the Danish Counter-Strike scene, but here it tends to be a homophobic discourse that is used to attack the other guys. On several occasions at the cyber café and at the LAN I heard someone yell out ‘homo’ or ‘fag’ for instance. Interestingly this does not cause the younger boys to attack the girls with hints of lesbianism. The social discourse here is that women whom they feel a need to demean default to victims who can be raped while the other guys are attacked for being ‘gay’ i.e. non-masculine. It is not only the women’s nicks that may be used to signal gender neutrality. During the group interview Tibi mentioned that they chose the name Team All 4 One for the clan because it did not symbolise that they were girls. I asked her why this was important during the IRC-interview to which she replied: <Tibi^Tøjvask> Think we all more or less were tired of people looking down on girl clans, so we’d rather be called something that didn’t say that we were girls at a first glance. And also personally I think it is ridiculous to be called something like super girls or girls armey or whatever girls can come up with these days. Think names that at once say that you are 57 girls send out a signal that you want to be contacted and chat with guys and not really that you want to play. This shows that the clan name is used to distance Team All 4 One from other female clans that do want to signal that they are girls playing the game. But I also think it shows the imbalance of genders in the Counter-Strike game space very clearly. By signalling with your clan that you are a group of girls that play Tibi seems to think that you actually draw attention from the male players who want to ‘contact’ and ‘chat’ with you rather than ‘wanting to play’ the actual game. Put bluntly I think Tibi is saying that if you signal that you are a girl – by using the word girl in your clan name – you’re basically signalling that you’re in the chat room to get attention and not to play Counter-Strike. In Denmark female clans such as ‘[Babe]’ or ‘SoldierGirls’ would be obvious targets. Although this stance may not be very supportive of the other girl clans I do believe that this view reflects Tibi’s experiences with her playing as ‘Stinna’ and being in the ‘GirlZ’ clan. So when it came to choosing a name for the clan her prior experiences with the male gaming population of the Counter-Strike scene made her support a clan name, which would not invite guys that think they did ‘not really want to play.’ I see this as a sign of how the IRC channels that are used on the Counter-Strike scene are gendered spaces, where if you draw attention to your femininity in your nick or through your clan name you are treated differently than if you, via your nick and your clan name, attempt to hide the fact that you are a woman. Good Girls Don’t Swear I get the feeling that some of the harsh language used in the online spaces is tied to the competitive element in the game and it is not exclusive to young men bashing women verbally, but rather it is used by players in game if things are not going their way (Wright et. al 2002). Still, this does not excuse the misogynous discourse at all. I did find, however, that the women adopted a language online, which came into conflict with their perceptions of being feminine: <Tore> Do you think there is a difference between Tibi and [your real name]? <Tibi^Tøjvask> No not really. […] it’s just two different environments they are in. But I would think that a person like my mom would say that there is a big difference, because in her eyes I’m, the “good” girl and on irc you have to be tougher and things are said on vt30 that I would never say otherwise. <Tore> What do you say on irc or vt that you would not otherwise say? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Normally I am a very cautious person who doesn’t want to step on anyone’s toes, but on irc you have to do it once in a while. So in that way there’s a difference between us. 30 Acronym for Ventrilo, a voice chat program that they use both when playing at home and at tournaments, which enables them to have their hands free for playing the game instead of using Counter-Strike’s text based chat function. 58 <Tibi^Tøjvask> Like I can call people homos or hags or just sit around and swear, even my boyfriend says that I begin speaking foul when I’m sitting there [with] the chicks or other mates. <Tibi^Tøjvask> :) <Tore> :D <Tibi^Tøjvask> with* <Tibi^Tøjvask> it’s probably a ‘work related injury’ <Tore> hehe At first denying that she has a different attitude online, an online alter ego if you will, she does establish an image of herself online, which contrasts her offline personality. She would never call a person a homo or a bitch to their face, but the online environment gives her this ‘tougher’ language. She does jokingly refer to her use of harsh language as a ‘work related injury’, which considering some of the comments she’s used to getting as a woman is not that surprising. It’s also an interesting linguistic juxtaposition that when trash talking males she adopts the male players’ discourse. I was curious as to how she felt being this tough trash talking identity: <Tore> How does it feel to talk nastier than you would otherwise do? <Tibi^Tøjvask> A little liberating actually but it has come gradually, don’t think I talked just as nastily 1 year ago on vt, but when you’re sitting there with chicks or guys who can burp and fart and proclaim out loud that they have to go take a dump, then you probably become a little more indifferent if you say something yourself which is not really that nice. <Tibi^Tøjvask> I was almost laughed at if I said on vt that I had to go take a wee, “you have to say that you have to go piss” said [Vildkatten] e.g. <Tibi^Tøjvask> you* <Tibi^Tøjvask> still have a hard time saying it though :) <Tore> But you still do it? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Can’t remember right off when the last time I said it was.. actually think that it was when [Vildkatten] was still on board, because she always laughed and said the other thing to me. The above example shows how the tough language of the online space and Vildkatten’s jests influenced Tibi’s language. She is well aware that ‘good’ girls shouldn’t be talking this way and she would never do it in public, but in order to fit in she toughens up and actually finds the experience ‘liberating’. I would also claim that Tibi’s change of discourse also shows what limitations women are under in other social spaces, where they actually feel constrained by the expectations of e.g. mothers – or even boyfriends i.e. males – who have a very clear view that this isn’t what good girls do. <Tore> Ok. I’m wondering, what does the world feminine mean to you? 59 <Tibi^Tøjvask> It certainly mean a lot, but it’s about finding the boundary in this male dominated world, we would like to be taken seriously as players and at the same time be a pure girl clan. <Tibi^Tøjvask> But also really think that you loose a little of it when you play and when you stop then it’s there again. <Tore> How does your own femininity express itself when you stop? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Then I am back in my own world again and all the nasty words are forgotten then, as it were. <Tore> :D <Tibi^Tøjvask> Then the manners are there again too. <Tore> What manners are those e.g.? <Tibi^Tøjvask> Like I said, I would never dis someone irl31 or call them homos. Tibi makes a very clear distinction between the online ‘world’ and the ‘real world’ this distinction seems to linguistically distance the online spaces she makes use of as being not real, although as I’ve already described she very much feels the impact on the online space on her ‘real world’ self when she’s being harassed by male players because of her gender. She does not believe that femininity has a place in the male dominated online spaces. It’s almost as if it’s something that can be hidden away and be put on again in the real world. Also her tie in of manners into the equation shows yet another aspect of the “good” girl that is only used in ‘the real world’. In Tibi’s case her online persona seems to differ from her usual timid self, but Vildkatten felt that she at times had to tame her temper when playing online, which she underlined when I asked her about why she was not one of the women playing the Sims or using the EyeToy: Vildkatten: [...] I’ve played a hell of a lot with boys, while growing up too. So I thought it was much cooler to play cops and robbers than to sit and play with Barbie [Tore laughs]. I thought it was much cooler to dig holes and things like that, and doing stuff you weren’t allowed to do. Setting stuff on fire [We both laugh]. Hello! Frying ladybirds in the woods together with the mates. This shows how Vildkatten constructs an image of herself as being a girl who got to hang out with the boys when she was little. Her example is clearly one of a girl participating in what Jenkins (1998) calls 19th century boys’ culture. She also claimed that this had made her brasher when she spoke, which had an influence on how she would act around other female CS-players: Vildkatten: […] If you’re playing with the girls there are things, which you shouldn’t say. If I’m playing with the guys then […] unfortunately it’s rubbed off when they trash talk. If they get really pissed then they say stuff, and if you’ve been playing with the guys for three years and they say certain things. You’ll take that too. 31 Acronym for In Real Life – here Tibi actually uses the abbreviation as written irl, which shows the influence the English language has on the language used by the Danish Counter-Strike community online. 60 Tore: What’s that for instance? Vildkatten: Well, it can be some very, very bad things. I’m not even going to say it because it’s not feminine at all! [We laugh] I’ll say it like this that my boyfriend he gets a chock once in a while if I’m gaming and if he has to study then he walks over and says he simply gets afraid of you. And then he says “You’re not damn feminine.” And I say “No I haven’t made any claims to be damn it!” When you’re playing then you’re not feminine. You aren’t. They’re not nice words coming out of your mouth […] It can actually be some very harsh things coming out. What I find especially fascinating here is that even though Vildkatten ascribes herself as a girl who liked to burn things as a child, she is also very aware of the fact that she is not being ’feminine’ when she plays Counter-Strike and gets ’pissed’. Also she claims that she has to tone down her language when playing with the other girls, but the guys’ harsh language has ’rubbed’ off. In the interview situation she is even a little embarrassed to a degree where she won’t tell me exactly what she says but instead brands it as being ’not feminine’. From the interview with Tibi though I seem to get the feeling that Vildkatten was a little brasher than some of the other female players. Although she later says that she’s never claimed to be feminine when her boyfriend playfully chides her. It seems that in order to fit in on the Counter-Strike scene Vildkatten has adopted a discourse that is not feminine, although this is not necessarily in opposition to her selfimage. Summary I believe I have shown how the online game space is gendered, not because of the representational content, but because of the gendered activities that take place within the game space. If the female players do not take precautions and use fake nicks when playing they open themselves to attacks on their gender from male players, which may be extensively misogynous. Even the clan name Team All 4 One was chosen to signify gender neutrality. This puts the clan in opposition to other female teams that actually want to show that they are girl gamers. The women have adopted the discourse of the male players in order to fit in and are very aware that this discourse is not seen as being feminine. Whether you are normally a timid girl outside the game or a girl who grew up burning ladybirds there seems to be no large difference in adopting the discourse, however, being able to speak from the gut seems to be a liberating experience for these women. IRC Channels and Game Sites Now I want to move outside the game space and into some of the other online spaces where interaction between players takes place. These also have a strong influence on the male gamers’ perceptions of the female gamers and how they feel the Danish Counter-Strike community views them. In the previous chapter I talked about how some of Team All 4 One’s female friends did 61 not seem to understand their fascination spending so much time using the computer. When it comes to the game the spaces of the IRC channels play a vital role in this fascination: Tatiana: It’s really funny how you are so sucked into the community. And all the other people you know they know nothing about it. So they don’t understand it in any possible way. They say “How can you sit in front of the computer for so long? I get turned off after five minutes […] The reason I get sucked in is because it’s a whole community, right? It’s the mIRC32, not just computer games which are [the] place. Tatiana clearly states that it is the connection between the game and the IRC channel that ‘sucks’ her in and this community is what her friends ‘don’t understand it’. There is something besides the game space that is an attraction too. But what is it about the IRC channel that sucks you in? Vildkatten: […] Actually if you take the mIRC community then you can actually compare it to a youth club. Just multiply it by the number (of people), right? There are many more people. There is also just as much gossip. Even though people are sitting very far apart from each other then mIRC is a bit like a youth culture house in a way where people meet and people sit and gossip in the corners, and things are going on. […] And then there are some games, and some people are cheering for one side and some are cheering for the other. […] But it’s also like some people dare to be a little cheekier over the net, because they are sitting at home behind the screen. But other than that it’s the same. People via the screen, but it’s still people, right? During the time I spent in the clan’s IRC channel I noticed that much of the conversation was not about Counter-Strike, between calls from players across Scandinavia to join so-called mix games, there was casual conversation about hangovers, work or even jokes about sexual behaviour. At the LAN-event Tibi proudly told me that they’d had over 180 people in their channel when they celebrated their anniversary, which seems to indicate that the online ‘youth club’ was almost the frame work for a party. I also noticed that many of the people in the channel would be regulars, i.e. people who were not officially part of the clan, but rather friends who just came to hang around. The Danish game sites seemed to have similar communities of players who engage in discussion forums, where the conversations are more asynchronous, but are still full of gossip and cheering. For instance news of Team All 4 One participating in a tournament will get hailed on the forums with posts saying “GL” (good luck) and “HF :)” (have fun). Also there seems to be flirtatious behaviour going on here too similar to what Thomas and Walkerdine (1999) observed with children playing games in computer clubs in Australia. Here is an example from the 22nd of October following an announcement that A4O “the reigning world champions” would be taking on challengers at a computer trade show later that month33: (Male Gamer) 18:32 22/10 Wonder if [you] can play for special yields if victorious:D 32 mIRC is an IRC client. The name of the client is often used synonymously with IRC. 33 This excerpt is from the played.dk forums. I have made the male gamer anonymous, although his name does appear on the website. I felt this would be most fair to him, since I have not gotten his permission to use his statements for my example. According to his profile he’s 24 years old. 62 NissePigen 21:01 22/10 Any special yield maybe…..but if you loose then phew….if [nick34] dares show up and looses(which he most definitely will..loose that is!) then he has to jump on a trampoline wearing a kilt..!!:D (Male Gamer) 22:37 22/10 Hehe, he does that voluntarily:D, [I] was more thinking of you [girls] in gnome girl outfits maybe:) This snippet of a forum discussion is filled with smileys both from the male gamer and from NissePigen, which have quite a few grins ‘:D’ and a smile ‘:)’. The male gamer is indicating that he would like ‘special yields’ which NissePigen turns around into a ‘yield’ for the women – seeing a man jumping on a trampoline so they can look up his kilt35. This makes the male gamer stop beating around the bush and says that he wanted to see the girls in special ‘outfits’. To me this all seems in good fun. Despite the friendly tone, however, there are also quarrels taking place and it appears again a gender bias since the women did not seem to feel that the male gamers respect them as players. This can be seen in an example from another male gamer in the same forum thread: (Male Gamer 2) 19:06 22/10 Won’t it be a bit embarrassing when a Danish team comes out and says they’re the best women’s team in the world (even if they probably are), and then they are beaten by 5 teens who really don’t know jack about the scene, but have played a lot of ffa? Tibi (all 4 one) 19:08 22/10 Ehm….if you know a team like that then send them along.. like [we] said above we’re doing this for our sponsors and for the fun of it. We have proven that we’re the best girl team in the world so we might as well advertise it :) (Male Gamer 2) 20:28 22/10 It’s not meant as disrespect or anything, just a scenario I could imagine :) In this example the male gamer, although claiming not to be disrespectful is being just that, as far as I see. First of all he is assuming that a group of teenage boys who have no team experience, i.e. they’re ‘ffa’ players, can waltz in and beat A4O who just ’say’ they’re the current world champions. Tibi’s rebuttal sends him on the defensive, but he admits it to being a ’scenario’ that he ’could imagine’. In other words, in his mind a group of women – no matter how good – can probably be beaten by a group of inexperienced boys. This bias seems similar to the one of the ’whizzes’ and the ’whizn’ts’ (de Castell & Bryson 1998), namely the assumption that the boys are just better at playing Counter-Strike. 34 I’ve edited out the person’s nick here, but NissePigen naming him, obviously shows that she knows the player she’s referring to. 35 I also take this as a hint that if he’s a real Scotsman he’ll not be wearing anything underneath the kilt. 63 Stars and Starfuckers During my interviews I seemed to get the impression that the above scenario of a young male gamer doubting the women’s abilities as gamers was not that uncommon. I also believe this is what is at the root of a phenomenon which Team All 4 One referred to as the ’Starfuckers’36 during the interviews. I was asking Muus about how they would recruit a new member if one of the clan decided to call it quits, which made her write about this in the interview: <a4o|muus\\> Would probably look in the smaller clans, that maybe have 1 good girl gamer and see if we could find one who hasn’t ”made herself especially” noticed on irc [...] <Tore_> Why is it important to find someone who hasn’t ”made herself especially” noticed on irc? <a4o|muus\\> Because it can put the clan in a bad light. If you take in a player who is a ”starfucker” you’re asking to get a bad image and then [you] accept as a clan the way that quite a few girls behave <a4o|muus\\> and currently we’re not a part of that <Tore_> No, that’s certainly not my impression. <Tore_> What do you think the ”starfucker” phenomenon does to the reputation of girls within the CS-environment? <a4o|muus\\> It only makes it bad and it makes it so that it becomes even harder to be accepted as a girl clan who play because it’s fun. <Tore_> How do you experience that? <a4o|muus\\> I think the boys are really good at jumping on the bandwagon. I mean some girls are only part of the cs-scene so they can get attention, and they do it really thoroughly… so thoroughly that some boy apparently think all girls on the scene are there only to grab attention <a4o|muus\\> and not because they think cs is fun <Tore_> Do you feel you’re being put in a box? <a4o|muus\\> Yeah of course girls are put in a box. We get a lot of careless tarnished remarks time and time again, but we have all become better at ignoring them. <a4o|muus\\> and to be indifferent to what others might think. Muus underlines that if they were to recruit a new player she should definitely not be one that had made herself noted on ‘irc’ and equates that with being a “starfucker”. She puts herself in opposition to the “starfuckers” by not wanting to accept them into the clan. The “starfuckers” are apparently what give women players a bad name because they make the boys ‘jump on the bandwagon’, i.e. generalise broadly, because they seem to be on the IRC channels to grab 36 I use the word as they typed it in the IRC interviews. Obviously the correct English spelling would be star fucker. 64 attention, not to have fun. In fact, the generalisations made by male gamers seem to have escalated. Tibi mentions that ’tarnished remarks’ have increased since she began playing and that her attitude has become tougher too because of that: <a4o|Tibi> Back then the whole thing was very overwhelming to me, a whole new world suddenly opened up with a huge amount of people you didn’t even know who wrote to you and wanted to know all about you. Really caught me with my guard down <Tore> Yeah? Is it different now? <a4o|Tibi> Yeah, I’ll say, you know a lot of people today and I’ve learnt how to tackle things. Back then I was nice and talked with everyone who wrote to me, whereas today more and more people are put on ignore because there are many more ‘lamers’37 on quakenet38, or it seems that way at least. *Tore nods <a4o|Tibi> Girls on quakenet are not a novelty like they were back then and that’s why I think people they badmouth more today <Tore> Are you being badmouthed more today than back then? <a4o|Tibi> Yeah I think so, or maybe it’s not me in general, but girl gamers and girl clans [I] feel I get jumped upon time and time again today. I was a little surprised by her view that since the scene has grown more ‘lamers’ have appeared, and that more girls did not mean equity, but rather brought more ‘badmouthing’. So rather than creating a more balanced gender space by an influx of female gamers Tibi feels that the situation for women in this cyber place has actually worsened. Also just like Muus Tibi made a connection between “starfuckers” and disrespect from male gamers: <Tore> How do you feel about them being dissed because of that? <a4o|Tibi> I think it’s low, but it happens everywhere work places, schools, high schools etc. so it’s not something new, but since the girl boy ratio on quakenet is so uneven and many girls like being the centre of attention and scoring them all, then it’s hard. I hate it when people begin to disrespect other girl gamers in front of me. <Tore> Do you go against them? <a4o|Tibi>No, I either leave or else I just sit and listen. I’d say that some times there are also some dense chicks here on quakenet who just don’t think very straight and then you can’t help laughing when the boys tell stories about them <Tore> Ah. 37 A ’lamer’ is basically someone who is lame or dumb. I noticed the women talk about gaming experiences where they were just playing casually, i.e. non-competitively, as ’laming’. But it appears that one can also ’lame’ outside the game as Tibi indicates here. 38 Quakenet is the collective name for the server network that hosts all the IRC channels used by most of the FPS communities in Europe. 65 <a4o|Tibi> So in that sense I’m not one who tells them to shut up, I just think it gets old in the long run listening to the same [people] being disrespected <Tore> Ok. Why don’t you tell them to be quiet? <a4o|Tibi> Don’t think it’s my business, [I] am the kind of more quiet type of person, also think it’s a little harmless as long as they don’t do it in front of the girls who’s backs they’re talking behind, don’t think I’d stay in a group of boys if they were talking about someone who was right next to them and could hear the whole thing. It takes place in all places and so there are just active and passive participants in talks like that. What I still don’t understand from my brief introduction to the ‘Starfucker’ phenomenon is where is the limit? When are you dating someone who plays Counter-Strike and when are you a Starfucker? All the women from team a4o told me that they have, or have had, boyfriends who either play Counter-Strike or are in fact part of the Counter-Strike scene. Some of these boyfriends were really good players too, apparently, but they also distance themselves from being Starfuckers – e.g. Muus above. So to me it seems that they are adopting a condescending view of younger female players based partially on hearsay and rumours spread by the male gamers. Obviously calling yourself a Starfucker is not an option for any of these women, and it should most certainly not be. I get the feeling that they’re heavily influenced by the male-dominated discourse of the gendered space the game is in. And if flirting occurs between computer gamers on both forums and in IRC channels should it not follow in the offline spaces when these players do meet? What I find really interesting is that women who excel at scoring men are ostracised and ridiculed by other male players, because they are doing something the males cannot do – using physical attraction to get close to the ‘star’ male players. However, the discourse that surrounds the ‘Starfuckers’ is that they don’t play the game but they just hang around and chat: Vildkatten: [...] That’s also why the girls, it’s not why they are bad, but many of the girl clans spend more time chatting than they spend on playing Tore: Ok? How do you sense that? Vildkatten: Because they plat goddamn terribly! [Laughs] There are just some people where you say: “Oh Lord have mercy! Is that your first time playing!?” I mean it’s almost like when they call themselves CS-players, I can almost get really steamed and say “Call yourself for IRC-player, right?” It seems to me that women must earn respect as players first and foremost before they can actually begin to chat about causal things outside the game space, which is not unlike the situation faced by women in management in Denmark today that must prove themselves as hard workers rather than people with good social skills. The danger of being branded as a ‘Starfucker’ if you hang around the channels too much seems imminent. In other words the perception seems to be game skills before social skills. And if we look to the statement from Multimedieforeningen in Chapter 1 we can see a correlation between the essentialist masculine and feminine values. The 66 males are gamers. The women are social. This gives me the feeling that for female gamers it seems to be harder to be casual gamers on the Counter-Strike scene, especially if they happen to be dating a good player. Yet, there also seems to be issues with the way some of the women players present themselves to the Counter-Strike community at large, in fact the professionals who have ‘made it’ seem to think that the behaviour of the inexperienced younger women damage their reputation as a whole: Vildkatten: I was the first female CS-writer. I was the first female CS-ShoutCaster39. I was the first female CPL-contestant40 […] and I sort of think that it was a little ground breaking, even though I didn’t talk to any of the other girls and I didn’t play with any of the other girls. And I distanced myself from those who used the game in that other way. You know all that with promoting oneself and making that type of film and putting out photos. Some of them sent out more or less semi-pornographic pictures. And I said “You know what? I think you should go on the Jubii-chat or dating.dk41” or what the hell it is called. “Because this is a game. And it’s serious.” […] The above quote shows the pride Vildkatten has in her achievements and she tentatively admits that she would like these to have been (’ground breaking) eye openers for the guys on the scene. By almost avoiding the other girls on the scene she distanced from promotion of oneself based on bodily factors that have nothing to do with the game. Even though it’s a game, it’s serious business. Why? Because these women are investing a lot of time and effort in the game and since they experience that the guys easily jump the gun and call them all starfuckers because of the actions of some of the girls. She admits however to starting out with a different attitude: Vildkatten: In the beginning, during the first six months when I played, I could sit around and chat. I could also enjoy chatting with some boys, and stuff which I distance myself from today. But the instant you get into those tournaments then you totally develop from there and say, ”This is a sport. This is serious business. This is about Counter-Strike and it’s money.” In Vildkatten’s eyes the newbie gamer is one who can enjoy ‘chatting with boys’ where as the serious gamer sees the game as a ‘sport’, ‘serious business’ and ‘money’. I see this as being exemplary of what newbies on the Danish Counter-Strike-scene can aspire to in the game spaces depending on their gender. If you’re a boy the way to the stars lies before you. You can earn the title of a star player, and if you prefer socialising to gaming, well, you’re just part of the horde of other guys. Whereas for girls that tend to socialise, fall in love perhaps, or are just driven by plain sexual desire they can look forward to wearing the badge of a ‘fucker’. This also means that even though Team A4O are a well-respected team within the Danish CS-scene, they’re not seen as stars or star players. The question then is, can they ever make this transition? When it comes to 39 ShoutCast is actually a streaming radio service, which is synonymous with internet radio. A ShoutCaster is a presenter who covers Counter-Strike games and interviews the players after the games. 40 Vildkatten told me earlier in the interview that she was the first female to play Counter-Strike in the CPL Europe before the branch went bankrupt, which is what she is referring to in this excerpt. She is not claiming to be the first female ever to play professionally – which was Stevie ’Killcreek’ Case as mentioned in Chapter 2. 41 Jubii is a portal site in Denmark used by more casual internet users. Dating.dk is an online dating portal. 67 their non-gaming friends and relatives I believe it is possible, since they get their information about the Counter-Strike scene from mass media, who seem to focus on the World Championships. However, the respect from the male gamers seems further off, since the voices that disrespect the women seem to drown out the ones that do respect them in the spaces that matter to gamers on the IRC channels of QuakeNet and on the gaming forums. But why is this then? I think we can look to the current division of gender in gaming tournaments for a possible explanation. The women all acknowledge that they are not currently able to compete at the same level as the men, but there are different opinions about having male and female tournaments: Vildkatten: Personally I’m against dividing it by gender, because it’s a shame doing it. I was really happy watching the equestrian jumping at the Olympics. Because it’s not divided by gender. They jump together there damnit. I’ve always been against it. I’ve been beaten up by the other girls because I’ve voiced my opinion, and I think that it’s a load of crap that you separate it. Because the girls can be just as good as they guys if they really want to. It’s a question of enthusiasm and motivation, and you having ambitions. [...] It’s not a question of your gender that is. [...] Vildkatten’s stance is that since there are no gendered divisions in equestrian sports there shouldn’t be any within Counter-Strike, because it’s a question of the player’s individual attitude towards the game based on ’motivation’ and ’ambition’. Additionally she claims that this view has caused her to get into trouble with the female Counter-Strike community at large, which I believe shows that the women who play this game at top level are divided in this issue. Even Vildkatten herself admits to struggling with this. Vildkatten: I’ve also said, “Yeah ok. We can win some money with the girls anyway, so that’s what we’ll do.” […] So I also hope that…I’ve had a part in raising the girls’ level, with the tactical insight suddenly, that the boys have been going with. But the computer, really, couldn’t give a damn if you’re tall, short, fat, skinny, yellow or green, right? I mean it doesn’t give a shit if you’re male or female, right? It’s a question of will. I think this statement really underlines the main problem that many of the male gamers on gaming sites seem to have with the female leagues that I will be discussing in the next section. The hardware or the software doesn’t care who you are, when you play the game, however as I have shown above when it comes to recruitment the male gamers do care since women on the team cannot socialise on an equal level with them. This seems not only to be unique to A4O or Vildkatten as we can see in an interview with Zirkeline, another Danish female player that I came across: […] a lot of girls don’t like the way they are treated by men. Playing in female cups is much easier than playing against men. It’s finally possible to play in the way it should be, without flames, lame behaviour or sexist jokes. In a female cup they will feel respected and because of that they will be more confident about themselves. [Another] big reason is the skill part. Girls aren’t involved in gaming that long yet. Therefore there is a difference between male and female gamers as it comes to experience 68 and skills. Also a lot of female gamers aren’t taking gaming that serious yet. Female cups are a good way to attract woman to competitive female gaming, to build experience and to stimulate them to become better (Neuteboom 2004). I see Zirkeline’s statement as a brief description of how the male players in general treat the female players in the community, and also how she sees female tournaments as a place for female gamers to be free of harassment. This means that the experiences of Team All 4 One do not seem to be isolated cases of the pros, but something that is perhaps experienced by many female Counter-Strike players. However, as I’ve shown earlier in this chapter, there seems to be a view that the female tournaments simply are not as good as the male ones, so in the end although the female tournaments provide a game space which is less hostile to women, they are also adding fuel to the bonfire that girls really have no place in the top Counter-Strike teams. Summary The IRC channels and gaming forums seem to be highly biased towards the male majority on the Danish Counter-Strike scene. Women who are not good players, but date good players are looked down upon as being “starfuckers” and it seems that a few bad apples ruin the bunch. There is very little indicating that the good female players can ever become real stars since both the male players and the females view the female tournaments as being inferior. Although for the women the money is an incentive. So female cups and championships may be a way forward for the small group of women participating in Counter-Strike. Still, all is not doom and gloom. The women have strong social networks in these online spaces and share grins and laughs there too. These spaces are online social rooms where you can find support even if you want to puke because of sexist remarks. 69 5 C O N C LU SIO N S A N D F U T U RE P E R SP E C TI V E S In this thesis I have shown that a multi-player first person shooter game such as Counter-Strike is more than just a gaming technology made up of code and graphics but rather it is a game that is made up of the code of the game and the social practices of its participants. On a purely representational level the game seems to exclude women since there are no female avatars to choose from and fetishises combat with modern weapons, the structural elements of the game such as tactics and team play a large role in the female player’s enjoyment of the game. Additionally it’s not just about the game itself since the technology and how it is used by gamers is surrounded by values and practices adopted by the players who form a strong community around it. This community is built in the offline social spaces and online social spaces. In my case study of the professional Danish female Counter-Strike players who participate in these spaces I have shown how these spaces and the activities that take place there are gendered. I do not claim that these findings can be applied to all women who participate in these spaces, but similar findings from Morris (2000) seem to be a clue that women who play first person shooters share many of these experiences. Also as shown in previous studies this gendering begins at home (Kerr 2003, Schott 2004) where it is usually the boyfriend or brother’s computer the women begin playing the game on. But since they don’t own the hardware they don’t have the final say in when they get to play. Additionally they may be relegated to secondary machines in the domestic space. The cyber cafés where clans meet to practice for competitive events are gendered spaces too. For a woman entering a cyber café for the first time it can seem like entering another world since it is filled to the brim with boys and young men staring at their monitors or wrestling in the corners. The few women who are at the cafés are often engaged in non-gaming activities such as chatting or checking their email. Even if there are women playing a game there they will probably throw a look towards any other women entering, just out of curiosity. Secondly the managers see this as women not being interested in games and hence do not think about how their cyber cafés could be adapted for female players – by adding a ladies bathroom for instance. The gendering of the space can be an advantage to women because the guys there will often be helpful, especially if they are newbies. Some of the more bashful fellows may however begin to flirt which can be 70 uncomfortable. Cyber cafés are not just places where you play the game, but also places where you socialise with your clan or even hang out with players from other clans. A similar scene unfolds at LAN events, where the spaces default to being male, since there are no places for the women to change or clean up. The social space of the event then prevents women from activities, which some of them consider to be part of their feminine identity such as being neat and presentable. Hence, if women want to participate as gamers they must abide by the values defined by the male participants and organisers. The professional players of Team All 4 One seem to be respected both socially and skill wise by the male players at these events, who in some cases are world champions themselves. Still, there are no clans today made up of both male and female players, which the women ascribe to the biased view of the male clans. Apparently the top male clans consider women a hindrance to their social interaction – the odd woman out, who cannot sleep in the same bed as them. This leads to the male clans recruiting new members exclusively from the existing male player base effectively keeping women out. Instead the top female teams participate in women’s tournaments, which in turn are not considered to be as good as the male tournaments by most of the community since the top female clans are not close to beating the top male clans today. This is where I see the Catch 22. In order for you to get good enough at Counter-Strike to play in a tournament you have to practice in a cyber café with a clan, preferably a clan with players that are better than yourself, so they can teach you the tricks of the trade. But since none of the top male clans at the moment are hiring female players, perhaps because they are under the impression that women are a hassle to have along at LAN events and tournaments, the women get excluded from the top clans. In effect this means that women have a really hard time progressing as top-level Counter-Strike players. The view of women being lesser players is most evident in the online social spaces that are part of the Counter-Strike community in Denmark, for instance on a forum where a male gamer indicates that a random group of male teenagers can beat the reigning women’s world champions in an exhibition match. Although Team A4O have many male friends who defend them and rebut such statements, they are nonetheless affected by the assumption that most female Counter-Strike players are ”starfuckers” who are only part of the community to score a ”star” who is per default a top male player. In turn the professional female players see these, often younger, women as giving female gamers a bad name because they are more interested in IRCdating than being serious about playing the game. It is not transparent though what makes you a ”starfucker”, and it seems very much like a role created by the younger male gamers in order to defend their territory. It seems that in order to legitimately be allowed to flirt or have a male player for a boyfriend, a female must have proven herself to the male gaming community first. Also her actions will be closely scrutinized by the female pros because they do not want to risk 71 being associated with a ”starfucker” and they feel that these actions undermine their hard-earned achievements as players. The advice to be passed on to the younger players seems to be that they shouldn't make too much noise and instead play the game - speak softly and carry a big gun. In order to be part of the Counter-Strike scene the women were very much aware that they had to adopt another discourse than they would normally consider feminine. They accept this, but also seem aware of the schism between their offline persona and their online persona. They had even experienced that their boyfriends would jokingly say that they were not being feminine if they swore or cursed too much. In other words the language you have to adopt online is gendered to favour a masculine discourse if you want to be taken seriously by the other gamers there, but the discourse can sometimes become too much. All the women reported many cases of being harassed by highly misogynous comments from especially young and immature male players. Yet this immaturity could in some cases make the women give up playing for the night. Although the technology is there for the women to quickly escape these encounters online the remnants of the spiteful words seem to linger for quite a while in the women’s minds. Despite the negative sides of the community the empowerment these women experience by just participating in professional tournaments is something they are immensely proud of. This shown not only by their display of trophies at the events they participate in, but also in the way they talk about their achievements. They are also given status from women outside the gaming community who are tremendously proud of their world champion friends or sisters. Before becoming world champions A4O had to deal with the stigmatisation of being a gamer, but it is thought provoking that if you want to be accepted as a female Counter-Strike player by your non-gaming friends you have to achieve something at World Champion level before it becomes acceptable. So even though some of the male gaming community believes that female tournaments are inferior compared to the ‘real’ world championships, society at large sees their achievements in a different light. At the end of this thesis many questions still seem to linger though. It would be interesting to see further research done on the gendered composition of clans. How do the recruitment processes work in the top clans? Do they pick new members because they know them personally or do they look at gaming statistics? What do they think about bringing female players along to events. Also many of the girls’ stories were those of being the only female in a team of five players. Why is it that so there are no teams of two women and three guys playing? What are the social structures of clans that seem to prevent this? 72 I hope that by unveiling the social structures surrounding a group of ‘invisible’, but highly proficient female gamers, I have shown the flaws of arguments which brand first person shooters as violent and anti-social purely based on the representational elements of these games, and in turn claim that these games are in opposition to women essential natures. Instead I have shown a rich community that has a heavy male bias, which may cause many women to only scratch the surface of the game, but then get out quickly. For those that do stay in the community though the potential of having empowering experiences of achievements and personal victories does exist. Still a major shift in the mentality of many of the younger gamers is required, however the bias and harassment they subject the female players to need to be tied to greater issues of inequity in general. I believe studies like this can hopefully show these younger players that women can play and they want to play, but they need a space to play in. 73 B IB LIO G RA P HY Blomberg, Jeanette et. Al. ‘Ethnographic Field Methods and Their Relation to Design’ in Schuler & Namoika (eds.): Participatory Design: Principles and Practices, LEA 1993, p. 123-154 Bryce, Jo and Rutter, Jason (2002) ‘Killing Like a Girl: Gendered Gaming and Girl Gamers’ Visibility’ in GDC Conference Proceedings, F. Mayra (ed.), Tampere: Tampere University Press, 2002. Cassell, Justine and Jenkins, Henry ‘Chess for Girls? Feminism and Computer Games’ in Cassell, Justine and Jenkins, Henry (eds.) (1998) From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: gender and computer games, Cambridge and London: The MIT Press. Cassell, Justine and Jenkins, Henry (eds.) (1998) From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: gender and computer games, Cambridge and London: The MIT Press. de Castell, Suzanne and Bryson Mary ‘Retooling Play: Dystopia, Dysphoria and Difference’ in Cassell, Justine and Jenkins, Henry (eds.) (1998) From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: gender and computer games, Cambridge and London: The MIT Press. ChocoCat, (Not dated) ‘Fun Sim Stuf’ from The Sims Help Page, publication date unknown. Available: http://www.geocities.com/calamari_magic2000/funsimstuff.html Christensen, Sune a.k.a Felix (2004) Interview med Artamis fra a4o (in Danish) CSWeb.dk, July 14th. Available: http://www.csweb.dk/csweb.asp?show=is&id=14 Graner-Ray, Sherri (2004) Gender Inclusive Game Design: Expanding the Market, Hingham, MA: Charles River Media Entertainment Software Association (2003) ‘The ESA Pressroom’. Available: http://www.theesa.com/pressroom.html Heide Smith, Jonas (2001) ‘Column: What women want - (and it ain't Counter Strike)’. GameResearch. Available: http://www.game-research.com/art_what_women_want.asp Jakobsson, Mikael & Taylor, TL ‘The Sopranos Meets EverQuest: Socialization Processes in Massively Multiuser Games’FineArt Forum, Vol. 17, Issue 8, August 2003. Available; http://www.fineartforum.org/Backissues/Vol_17/faf_v17_n08/reviews/jakobsson.html Jenkins, Henry (1998) ‘Complete Freedom of Movement’ in Cassell, Justine and Jenkins, Henry (eds.) (1998) From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: gender and computer games, Cambridge and London: The MIT Press. Jenkins, Henry (2001) ‘From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: Further Reflections” presented at Playing By The Rules: The Cultural Policy Challenges of Video Games, U. Chicago, October. Available: http://culturalpolicy.uchicago.edu/conf2001/papers/jenkins.html Katla (2004) ‘less that 12 houers to go’ on Himmelen bak er slitsomt blå, April 11th. Available: http://blomstereng.homelinux.net/katla/000453-less_that_12_houers_to_go.php 74 Kennedy, Helen W (2002) ‘Lara Croft: Feminist Icon or Cyberbimbo? On the Limits of Textual Analysis’ on Game Studies, Vol 2, Issue 2. Available: http://www.gamestudies.org/0202/kennedy/ Kennedy, Helen W. (2004) ‘From Players to Pimps: Female quake clans and the art of 'skinning'’, in Salaverria, R. & C. Sadaba (eds.) Towards New Media Paradigms. Content, Producers, Organisations and Audiences, Pamplona: Ed. Eunate. Kerr, Aphra (2003) ‘Girls Women just want to have fun – A study of adult female players of digital games’ in Copier, Marinka and Raessens, Joost (eds.) Level Up: Digital Games Research Conference Proceedings, Utrecht: Utrecht University. Abstract available: http://www.gamesconference.org/2003/index.php?Abstracts/Kerr Kvale, Steinar (2000) InterView – En introduction til det kvalitative forskningsinterview Copenhagen: Hans Reitzels Forlag. Translated from Kvale, Steinar Interviews (1994) by Nake, Bjørn Laurel, Brenda (2001) Utopian Entrepreneur, Cambridge and London: The MIT Press. Lessig, Larry (1999) Code and Other Laws of Cyberspace, New York: Basic Books, pp. 3-8 & 63-84 Ludlow, Peter [a.k.a. Urizenus] (2003) ’Evangeline: Interview with a Child cyber-Prostitute in TSO’ Alphaville Herald, Dec. 8. Available: http://www.alphavilleherald.com/archives/000049.html Mishler, E. G. (1986). Research Interviewing: Context and Narrative. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. pp. 117-135 Morris, Sue (1999) Gender and Online Gaming . GameGirlz Feature. Available: http://www.gamegirlz.com/articles/quakewomen.shtml Played.dk (2004) Website. Available: http://played.dk/ Neuteboom, Jochebed a.k.a. Trinity (2004) ‘Female leagues: why?’ on mysod.nl – Surrender or Die clan website, October 10th. Available (Free registration required): http://www.mysod.nl/?p=feature&fid=38&page=6 Schott, Gareth R. and Horrell, Kristy R. (2000) ‘Girl Gamers and Their Relationship with the Gaming Culture’ Convergence, v. 6, n. 4, 36-53 Schott, Gareth R. (2004) ‘”For men:” Examining Female Reactions to Nintendo’s Marketing for GameBoy Advance SP’ New Zealand Game Developers Conference Paper Swallwell, Melanie (2004) “The History and Development of LAN groups: An Australasian Case Study” Other Players Heide Smith, Jonas and Sicart, Miguel (eds.) (2004), Copenhagen: IT University of CopenhagenTaylor, T.L. (2003) ‘Multiple Pleasures: Women and Online Gaming’ Convergence, Vol. 9, No.1: 21-46. Available: http://www.itu.dk/people/tltaylor/papers/Taylor-WomenAndGaming.pdf Thomas, Angela Thomas and Walkerdine, Valerie (1999) Girls and Computer Games. University of Western Sydney. Available: http://orlando.women.it/cyberarchive/files/thomas.htm Turkle, Sherri (1995) ‘Aspects on the Self’ from Life on the Screen, New York: Simon and Shuster. 75 Wajcman, Judy (1991) Feminism Confronts Technology, Pennsylvania: The Pennsylvania State University Press Wright, Talmadge, et al. (2002) “Creative Player Actions in FPS Online Video Games Playing Counter-Strike Game Studies, v. 2, i.2, December Yates, Simeon J. and Littleton, Karen. (2001) ‘Understanding computer game cultures: A situated approach’ in Green, Eileen and Adam, Alison (eds.) Virtual Gender: Technology, consumption and identity, London: Routeledge. 76 A P P E N D IXE S I – My Gaming Bias I want the reader to know that I am not a very good FPS-player. My main experience with games in this ’genre’ comes from playing about 8-10 afternoon sessions of Enemy Territory in a game studies class at the ITU in 2003, and from completing Wolfenstein 3D in the early 1990’s. The first time I played Counter-Strike was in November 2003 in a 1 vs. 1 game in a cyber café in Germany against a fellow student on our way to a Games Conference in Utrecht. This is why I am not at any point qualified to make tactical statements of any sorts with regards to how good or how bad the women I’ve studied are in comparison to their male counterparts. All I can observe is that they are not placing among the top clans when playing tournaments against male clans, but they are beating male clans when they practice. That being said, I am a gamer, and have played a vast amount of games – mostly RPG and adventure games – on a large array of systems for about 25 years. Thus I have respect for gaming and the time and effort it requires to master a game. This also means that my experience playing games influences my view on the media effects debate when it comes to gaming. I cannot be convinced that violent games can be directly correlated to violent behaviour. I hope that the reader will take this into consideration when reading my Thesis. 77 II – Interview Guide: Group Interview This is a translation of the semi-structured interview guide I had prepared for the group interview with Team All 4 One. A4O Interview 19th of August, 2004 o Can you tell me a little about a4o’s history? o How did you hook up? Tournaments/Professional Gaming o How did the last tournament you were in (LoeW) take place? o How did you find just that one? - How else do you figure out what tournaments you want to participate in? o Why did you pick CS? - Rather than UT or Quake? o How many CS tournaments with prizes do you participate in during a year? – Which ones? o What does it take to make a tournament really cool? o How was LOEW different from ESWC? o Where do you find sponsors? - What do they say about you being a female clan? o How do you practice? - How often? - For how long? o Crew. Can you tell me a little about them? - Are they important? How? Self image o Why do you play in an all woman clan? o Why not a mixed clan? o Why are there even male and female divisions in CS? Recruitment o What does it take to play CS at your level? o How do you find Danish women who want to play in your clan? o Is that difficult? How so? Developers o Claus Due, president of Multimedieforeningen, said in Dec last year: ” Some of the best selling computer games target girls and women. E.g. the popular series The Sims, where you create and develop a virtual family. Also innovative initiatives like the EyeToy for the PS2 draw the girls in. Here you are yourself a part of the games where you, among other things, dance and move about in competition with friends” o ”The social aspect is exactly one of the drives behind these games’ success. The Feminists o What does it mean to you that you can’t pick female skins in CS? o Would you like to have them in there? o Why/why not? 78 o Violent/non-violent games… Their Male Opponents o How do you experience playing against men who know you’re women? o Boys? (Male) Friends/ (Female) Friends? o What do your male friends say about you playing CS? o What about your female friends? The Future o How does the future look for women in CS in Denmark? 79 III – Interview Guide: Individual Interview with Vildkatten CS in General Can you tell me a little about how you began to play CS? o Why was it CS you fell for? o Tournaments/Professional Gaming I read earlier this year that you were in Las Vegas to play CS – can you tell me a little about that? Are your ambitions still to play CS on a professional level? o (yes) Why do you play professionally? o (no) Why not? o o o Can you tell me a little about the last tournament you were in? o What is the role of the coach? o Are you still active in the Danish E-sport Union? o What do you do there? Female clans o o I can understand you’re in a mixed clan now … How was it playing in an all woman clan? o Which disadvantages were there? o What about mixed clans? o How is it in comparison to a mixed clan? o Why are there separate male and female divisions in CS at all? Recruitment o What does it take to play CS at your level? o How do you find Danish women who want to play in your clan? o Is that difficult? How so? Developers o Claus Due, president of Multimedieforeningen, said in Dec last year: ” Some of the best selling computer games target girls and women. E.g. the popular series The Sims, where you create and develop a virtual family. Also innovative initiatives like the EyeToy for the PS2 draw the girls in. Here you are yourself a part of the games where you, among other things, dance and move about in competition with friends” o ”The social aspect is exactly one of the drives behind these games’ success. Skins o What does it mean to you that you can’t pick female skins in CS? o Would you like to have them in there? o Why/why not? Male Opponents o How do you experience playing opposite men who know you’re women? o Boys? 80 (Male) Friends/ (Female) Friends? o What do you male friends say about you playing CS? o What about your female friends? The Future o How does the future look for women in CS in Denmark? 81 IV – Sample Interview Guide: IRC Interviews This is the guide I had prepared for the interview with Tibi. It was also semi-structured thematically with a few references to things she had previously told me. Questions for Tibi – individual IRC interview Her personal gaming history/history During the last interview you told me it was a boyfriend who introduced you to CS, is that right? Can you tell me a little about that? Was CS the first computer game you played? How did you begin playing computer games? May I ask how old you were when you began playing computer games? The clan What is the difference of playing on the national team and playing in a4o? What would happen to a4o if one of you quit playing CS? Her nick and her avatar Why did you pick the name All 4 One for the girl clan you founded? How did you make up your nick? Is there any difference between Tibi and Christina? Do you pick the same T or CT model when you play? Why? Professional gaming Why did you begin to play CS at tournaments where you can win money? Do you think of yourself as a professional CS player? What does it mean to you that there’s money involved when you play. Do you feel you play any different when you can win prizes? Femininity/Social construction What does it mean to you to be in a girl clan? What does the word feminine mean to you? Are you feminine? Can one unite being feminine and being a CS-player? What does the word nerd mean to you? Are you a nerd? 82 Other women I’ve heard several women say that playing computer games takes up too much time. What do you think about that? Do you play too much CS, do you think? I’ve read that women don’t care for war games, but you play CS. What’s your view on the violence in CS? What do your girlfriends say about you spending so much time on CS? Why is it you and not them who are spending time on CS? Were your toys any different from other girls when you were little? The Guys vs. Girls Does it feel any different winning over boy clans than girl clans? Do you play any different from the boys? Support and sponsors You told me earlier that CS is really boring without the internet. How much does the CScommunity mean to you? What does it mean to you that you know some of the guys when you are at a LAN? Would you go to a LAN if they weren’t there? What does it mean to you that Futtah has mad a song about you? What does it mean to you that you have Watt T-shits, your ESWC sign, your mascots etc. with you at LAN? Do you think about what you’ll be wearing when you’re going to a LAN? 83 V – Summary of the Work Process This Master’s Degree Thesis started somewhere completely different from where it ended, which is not unusual if one takes a hermeneutic perspective on the information I have acquired through this process. I began by wanting to do a classic comparative study of female gamers and nongamers. I thought that by doing so I could get closer to solving the riddle behind the huge gender gap I was seeing in a place like the Boomtown café I mention in Chapter 1. My original research questions were: 1. What does a game design model, which takes potential female gamers’ interests into consideration, encompass? 2. How can such a model be developed? 3. What target groups of non-gaming women do we need to focus on for such a model? 4. What are the traps and pitfalls of player-centred design that needs to be avoided by developers? 5. What methodologies may be used in order to avoid these traps and pitfalls? I’d written up a “methodology” too: I'll be using qualitative methods to interview female gamers in Denmark about why they play games. Additionally I want to observe how they actually play, and how their surroundings influence this. I'll also be using qualitative methods to interview non-gamers about why they are not into games, and try to find out what media types or past times they enjoy instead. I'll be examining literature pertaining to the subject in order to get an idea of what traps and pitfalls there may be in making games for the non-gamers. Finally I might want to do a participatory design seminar with non-gamers and (hopefully) developers in order to pin-point the final shape of the model. Looking back at this I’d say it was quite a mouthful. As it turned out gathering data from just six pro female gamers was quite an undertaking, so if I’d also wanted to add a number of nongamers and a participatory design seminar to the formula I would have needed much more time and many, many more hands. Also through my reading it became clear that the issues surrounding women and their invisibility in gaming was not a question of ’women who game’ and ’women who don’t’ because who in fact were the women gamers. If they play online-poker are they a gamer? If they play snake on their cell-phone are they gamers? I knew from my courses in target group analysis that my initial target group of women was way too large, but actually coming to terms with looking at a very select few women who game actually took almost six months of reading, meetings with TL and lots of debating with myself – and some helpful people on my weblog. 84 Once I’d established that I wanted to see how pro gamers were experiencing being women in a male dominated universe it was fairly straight forward to get the data collected, since my informants were very generous with their time and their willingness to be interviewed despite their busy schedules. What proved to be the biggest hurdle for me was actually writing the actual text in this thesis. I believe I had an inflated opinion of how fast I could write because many of the ideas were in my head. They just had to come down on paper. Things were not that simple, though. I really struggled with sitting down at home writing my thoughts down. In retrospect I think that having an office outside the home could have done me quite a lot of good. Also writing alone only made me accountable to myself. Apparently I shouldn’t trust myself too much though, because I had a poor tendency to procrastinate and ignore obvious signs that things were not progressing as well as they should. I think it comes down to me wanting to write a great thesis, but also in the back of my mind expecting the writing process to be a cakewalk. It would probably have helped tremendously with a project partner too. My reluctance to do so had nothing to do with the fact that I was not comfortable working with others. All five years of my university education has been structured around project work. Instead it had to do more with me not knowing anyone at the time who were interested in writing on this subject. My years of project work has taught me that when doing bigger things personal dynamics become more important than the intelligence of the people involved. So I was perhaps a bit too cautious in searching for other people, who were interested in the subject. As it turns out two women, Sutakamon Højrup and Emma K. Witkowski at the ITU were actually looking at gender issues with Counter-Strike at the same time as me. TL tried to set us up doing some of the datacollection together, but at the time they were ready to start I was not mentally ready. I believe if I’d been in a group some of the lethargy and procrastination would have had to be overcome because I would have been accountable to more people. All in all this process has been hard. I’ve had to kill a lot of darlings in the writing process and work many nights doing the final weeks. However, all good things must come to an end too. As a one of the PhD-students at the IT-University told me: ”You’ll never finish. You’ll just stop writing.” 85