bmd - trollz - greg king - sam hunt - asset sales

Transcription

THE VOICE OF MASSEY UNIVERSITY STUDENTS - AUGUST 2012 - ISSUE 6
BMD - TROLLZ - GREG KING - SAM HUNT - ASSET SALES
www.massivemagazine.org.nz
CONTENTS
ISSUE SIX
Well it’s now time for edition six
and I think we’ve finally got the
kinks out this MASSIVE beast we
produce each month. Thanks for
sticking with us as we have taken
on suggestions and worked on
getting the look and feel of the
magazine ‘refined’.
A lot of people have asked how do
we come up with those crazy cool
covers. While it would be good to
take heaps of credit for all of them,
the truthful answer is that we don’t
come up with them, the artists do.
All we do is ask someone who we
think fits MASSIVE’s style, and
around the fifth of the month an
email will pop into my inbox with
the next edition’s cover raring to
go. It’s usually an exciting time
around the office, mainly because
we never know what it’s going to be.
I mean, how can anyone demand
a cover with a women with an
ice-cream for a head, a picture of
a living castle that other castles
live in, a marionette spray painting
a wall made out of spray cans, or
a trick photograph of a person
that looks like they have been cut
in two. The amount of acid trips
needed to think of all that would
have hospitalised Keith Richards.
All we do is provide space, a blank
canvas in the guise of 6000 front
covers for this nation’s talented
artists to splash their own creative
flair on. The new look removes the
old masthead and allows artists
another degree of freedom in their
designs. And that’s how you attract
talented artists, let them do their
own thing and trust in their artistic
licence. Oh, and be open minded
and receptive to new ideas. That’s
what university is really for,
learning new perspectives.
Matt Shand, MASSIVE editor
REGULARS
02. IN SHORT
08. WELLINGTON NOTICES
10. PALMERSTON NORTH NOTICES
12. ALBANY NOTICES
14. LETTERS
58. COLUMNS
60. REVIEWS
62. COMIC
64. PUZZLES
FEATURES
17. THE CASE FOR THE DEFENCE
20. REPUBLIC DEBATE - A MATTER OF TIME?
24. WHY SO FERAL? BLOOD ON PALMY STREETS
26. FLATTING: A HORROR STORY
28. DISABILITY IN DISASTER - WITH A SMILE
30. SNUBBING THE TREATY? ASSET SALES & TRIBUNALS
32. BMD - BECAUSE WALLS WON’T PAINT THEMSELVES
36. THE TROLLZ THAT RUN OUR SOCIETY
40. PLAY IT AGAIN, SAM
42. REALITY ON DEPRESSION - PART TWO
46. MILLS AND POON
ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT
48. FIFTY SHADES OF F**KED UP - REALLY
50. KILLING IT AT MASSEY
52. OP-SHOP CHALLENGE
SPORTS
54. CHIEFS STORM HOME IN SUPER RUGBY FINAL
56. FRISBEE WORLD CHAMPS, THE ULTIMATE
EDITOR
Matt Shand
editor@massivemagazine.org.nz
04 801 5799 ext 62068
DESIGN, LAYOUT & ART DIRECTION
Cameron Cornelius
allstylenotalent@gmail.com
04 801 5799 ext 62064
ADVERTISING & SPONSORSHIP MANAGER
Jacob Webb
advertising@mawsa.org.nz
04 801 5799 ext 62069
027 894 8000
CONTRIBUTORS
Jack Biggs, Olivia Marsden, Annabel Hawkins, Bridgette
Bel, Tyler Dixon, Yvette Morrissey, Muhammaf Faisal,
Trent Pedley, Nicole Canning, Morgan Browne, Julia
Hollingsworth, Adam Dodd, James Greenland, Neerachar
Sophol, Hayley Locke, Atarau Rikirangi, Blake Leitch, Olivia
Jordan, Cameron Cornelius, Andrew Mcleod, Max Bell, Dick
Hardy, Jenna Talia, Rhiannon Josland, Catherine Irving,
Abigail Leggett, Marloes Van Geel, Paul Berrington, Claydan
Kirvan, Callum O’Neill, Thijs De Koning, Roy McGrath
PUBLISHER
WWW.MASSIVEMAGAZINE.ORG.NZ
Wellington Edition
ISSN 2253-3133 (Print)
ISSN 2253-3141 (Online)
ISSN 2253-315X (Print)
ISSN 2253-3176 (Print)
This publication uses vegetable based inks and environmentally
responsible papers. The document is printed throughout on
SUMO Laser, which is FSC® certified and from responsible
and Well Managed Forests, manufactured under ISO14001
Environmental Management Systems. MASSIVE magazine is
committed to reducing its environmental footprint.
IN SHORT
MASSEY ROWERS PRODUCE GOODS
MASSIVE ARTISTS,
ILLUSTRATORS &
PHOTOGRAPHERS
Jack Biggs
Cover Art – Milarky
This month’s cover art was done
by the talented artist known as
Milarky. A further selection of his
work (and him at work) can be
seen to the left and he describes
himself within a free flowing rap:
TWENTY THREE YEARS ON THIS
EARTH, GIRTHLESS CASUE A
MILARKY DONT EAT, DONT SLEEP JUST PAINT TO
SOME BEAT, FEET ALWAYS WITH
HIGH KICKS ON, PLAYING THE TRICKS I KNOW,
AMOUNGST THE STICKS,
CLICKS AND THUG FLICKS, SEASONED’LY STAINING, AND
STILL REMAINING TO SELFREASONED’LY GROW,
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU KNOW,
AND I PAINT HOW I FLOW, SO I
WONT GO DROP A CONSERTO OF MY WHY’S, THIS
IS JUST ME PIECE’S, NO LIES,
ALL TRICKS, AND
STAUNCHLY ORIGINAL
RELEASES, I’LL DO WHAT’S
DONE, HAVE FUN.. THIS ABOUT HOW A MILARKY
WOULD ROLL.. ..ALL TRICKS
AND AIR’O’SOUL
Republic Debate, a matter of
time? - Neerachar Sophol
Noei1984.deviantart.com
Noei1984.daportfolion.com
ERIC MURRAY AND HAMISH BOND BLITZED
their field in the Men’s Pair with an emphatic
victory at Eton Dorney. They won all three
races (heat,semi-final and final) comfortably on
their way to Olympic gold, capping off a superb
dominance in their field for the past few years.
Their first heat would prove to be their fastest
race of the regatta with the duo clearly stamping
their authority amongst their rivals. They
catapulted themselves into rowing folklore with
a new world record.
The pair took roughly 6 seconds off the former
record with a time of 6:08.50 with the second
placed Frenchmen, Chardin and Motelette
nearly 10 seconds off the pace. An amazing first
up race considering the French duo would finish
with the silver medal, highlighting the Masseys
pairs dominance like no other across the rowing
fraternity.
The semi-final proved much of the same, with
Murray and Bond gaining a comfortable victory,
only doing what they had to, before proceeding
to the final. Their time was in fact 40 seconds
down on their heat yet they had it comfortably
as they put cruise control on to save their energy.
02
The Friday night finals night was dubbed our
“Golden Hour” with Murray and Bond storming
home to win Gold with a time of 6:16.65. This
feat was later matched by Mahe Drysdale in
the single sculls final where he beat his demons
from Beijing where he fell crook.
Naturally it was a good night for the rowers and
a good haul all round, with Juliette Haigh and
Rebecca Scown (Massey) picking up Bronze and
the men’s double sculls of Nathan Cohen and
Joseph Sullivan claiming the first of the Golds
the night previously in an absolute thriller with
their final 500-metre sprint.
As for Bond “It was just relief”.
“Whatever happens in the future, we know over
these four years we have achieved everything
anyone could’ve set out to do in the pair and
that’s the main thing”.
“Before the semi-final I said we are at the Hillary
Step with the summit in sight now we are there
and no one can take that away”.
The golden boys delivered strongly as they were
pre-Olympic favourites. A huge burden to carry
yet they performed remarkably and have done
New Zealand and Massey proud.
The talented Neerachar Sophol
has become a regular artist for
MASSIVE magazine and for good
reason, her stuff rocks! Check out
more of her artwork on her blogs
above.
ERIC MURRAY
Age: 30
Height: 195cm/ 6’5’’
Sport: Rowing (Men’s Pair)
Weight: 98kg
Studied: Communications
Eric began rowing at age 18 at the Avon
Rowing club in Christchurch.
His reason for the taking up the sport was
that he was a “chubby little fat kid” and
because it would be “fun”. Now he and his
rowing partner, Hamish Bond, are not only
World champions but Olympic Champions.
In Defence of the Defence Adam Dodd
HAMISH BOND
Reality on Depression Part 2 Artwork by Diana Russell
Adam Dodd works as a Web and
Design Monkey. When imagining
what it would be like to follow
his dreams, he works in oils and
acrylic. If you search for him
online you will likely find someone
completely different by the same
name, so just visit http://exmss.
org/aporia/ He doesn’t update
very often but if you pester him,
he might.
Age: 26
Height: 189cm/ 6’2’’
Sport: Rowing (Men’s Pair)
Weight: 91kg
Studied: Buisness
Hamish Bond is a product of Otago Boy’s
High School which is where he began his
rowing career. His major ambition was to win
an Olympic Gold Medal and now that dream
has been achieved in record style.
Snubbing the Treaty? - Artwork
by Atarau Rikirangi
BMD photos - Blake Dunlop:
www.blakedunlop.co.nz &
Damin Radford
03
IN SHORT
EXCHANGE STUDENTS TELL WHAT IT’S LIKE
Olivia Marsden and Belle Hawkins
NZ BODY ART SHOWCASE
KUA TUTŪ TE PUEHU I TE KUNENGA KI
Bridgette Bel, Translated by Tyler Dixon
Taking audiences on a journey into unknown
dimensions and showing them never-beforeseen creatures, the 2012 NZ Body Art Showcase
returns to the Bruce Mason Centre this
September – with the central theme being “The
Future.”
The seventh annual NZ Extreme Make Up
and Special Effects extravaganza has always
offered the audience both contemporary and
indigenous styles of body painting, but this year
artists are asked to give their “glimpse into the
future.” Gleaming scaly monsters, glow-in-thedark creatures, and extraterrestrial beings glide
across a continual catwalk, prophesising what
we may come to expect in the light-years ahead.
THE MIDDLE OF WINTER IS A GOOD TIME TO
share a couple of fellow Massey students
exchange stories to show that travel and study
is possible!
Alice Clifford, a third-year graphic design
student recently returned from six months at
San Francisco State University. She says the
seeming never-ending process of organising the
trip was well worth it. “In a way it was a good
thing because I had to be totally dedicated to
doing the exchange.”
And it paid off. Although her expectations of
the typical American university life weren’t
quite the reality that greeted her, the grounded
support of the exchange programme, new
friendships, and colourful experiences made
the trip unforgettable. It was all about what you
want out of it and being open to the challenge
that living abroad brings.
San Francisco State enabled Alice to fly beyond
curricular events, landing internship experience
and two weeks’ work experience this month in
Japan with her typography lecturer and PHD
students. She also began to appreciate the flexibility that Massey provides within her degree.
As a born and bred Wellingtonion, her highlight
was exploring and learning a new city’s hidden
gems, as well as having San Francisco Museum
at her doorstep, and having time to discover
both Chicago and Mexico.
Alices’s advice for those considering an
exchange is to “go for it, it’s worth it!” Keep on
top of StudyLink overseas, stay open minded
and embrace the spontaneity that comes your
way –you never know what kind of awesome
adventure you’ll find yourself in.
04
Jessica Roden is on her way to the University of
Montanta to complete the final semsester of her
communications degree, starting on August 20.
In the lead-up to her pursuit of the all-American
experience, she is making her way across the
globe, pit-stopping across several continents
along the way.
She left New Zealand at the end of June and
flew to Hong Kong where she “shopped herself
silly”. Then it was on to Italy where she “has
been sampeling gelato for a month” and soaking
up the language. Belgium was next, where she
was nanny for an Italian family. “And yes, the
chocolate is as good as you would imagine!”
Jess chose Massey for her journalism career
because of its exchange programme. Her
process of applying was relatively straightforward but not without its bumps along the
way. “But when you really want something then
you just suck it up and do it”.
She says Jenny Loveday, Massey’s Exchange
Director, walked her through the process and
“was an absolute lifesaver”.
Jess is heading straight into the American fall,
putting z’s instead of s’s, into crispy creams,
and into dorm life for the first time. Her papers
include photo journalism, American history,
and current affairs reporting, with the other still
being finalised. For her, it’s all about putting
yourself outside your comfort zone – you can
never anticipate what you get to experience
along the way.
For more information about the Massey University
Exchange programme visit the student exchange
page on the website:
This annual event has helped promote,
showcase and celebrate excellence in extreme
make up and special effects. Each year the
event becomes more prestigious as the calibre
and pool of contestants continue to grow. NZ
Body Art Showcase has the ongoing support
of Sir Richard Taylor of Weta Workshop and
Auckland City, and the hallowed event has
become a destination for Hollywood to come
and sample some of the imaginative, creative
and simply stunning special effects New
Zealand has garnered a strong reputation for.
The showcase has also in part helped New
Zealand’s film industry gain a competitive
advantage internationally. With the development of the film and television industry in
New Zealand, this NZ Body Art and Makeup
Extravaganza will again be a landmark for
special effects make-up, body art and the art of
illusion throughout the world. This brings with
it international interest and helps to ensure the
sustained future for special effects make-up
artists in this country.
The awards promise to feature international
artists alongside our own homegrown talent,
with some international artists already registered
for the September showcase. Registration for
artists, models and volunteers are now open
until 22 August 2012.
Prior to the event (and highly recommended by
NZBAA ), the Fine Art Body Painting Workshops,
hosted by international body painting and
world awards winners Alex Hansen and Tim
Gratton, will take place on the 15th and 16th of
September 2012. If you want to participate in
exploring the craft of body painting in a spirit of
joy and communal artistry, the NZBAA urge you
to register now!
Visit our homepage www.nzbaa.co.nz and find
us on Facebook for more information.
NZ Body Art Showcase 2012 plays:
Saturday 22 September 2012 at 7.30pm
Bruce Mason Centre, The Promenade,
Takapuna, Auckland
Buy tickets at www.ticketmaster.co.nz
KUA TUTŪ TE PUEHU I TE KUNENGA KI
Pūrehuroa! I te timatatanga o tēnei tau i
whakatūria tētehi rōpu Māori hou ki Te
Whanganui-a-Tara, ko ‘Kōkiri Ngātahi’ tōna
ingoa, me tētehi whainga matua: Kia kōkiri
ngātahi ngā ākonga Māori, kia whaia ai te ara
hiranga o te mātauranga.
Ko te wawata a Kōkiri Ngātahi, he whakatū
ratonga hei āwhinatanga mā ngā ākonga
Māori i te whare wānanga, i waho hoki. Arā, he
tohutohu me pēhea e whiwhi karahipi, he momo
hākinakina, ngā akoranga Reo Māori, me ngā
hākari i ia rua wiki. Kei te ngana te tūmuaki, a
Nitika Eruera-Satish, ki te whakatū i ngā rōpu
ako, i ngā hui whakangahau, me ngā mahi-āRēhia kia kitea whānuitia tēnei rōpu nei.
Anō nei he rākau Tōtara te tipu o Kōkiri Ngātahi.
Ka tū ana he hākari ki te rūma Whānau, anā he
kanohi hou e kitea. Kua puta hoki te harikoa i
a rātou, “I taku tīmatanga ki te whare wānanga
i minaminahia e au te wairua Māori, engari tē
rongo. Manahau ana te ngākau ināianei i te
noho kotahi, i te noho-ā-whānau nei me aku hoa
ako Māori.”
Kua whakatūria kētia he rōpu Māori ki
Manawatu, arā ko ‘Manawatahi’, ki Tāmaki
Makarau hoki, arā ko ‘Te Waka o ngā Akonga’.
E tūmanakohia ana e ngā rōpu Māori e toru o
Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa kia whakakotahihia
ki ngā hui whakangahau. Ki Te Whanganui-aTara hoki nei, kua hono atu a Kōkiri Ngātahi
ki te rōpu Pasifika, whakamarohi ake ai i te
whanaungatanga o ngā ākonga o te Moana-nuia-Kiwa.
Kei te harikoa ngā kaumātua me ngā kaimahi
Māori, ā, e tautoko ana a Tā Mason Durie i
te whakatūriatanga me te whakatipuranga o
Kōkiri Ngātahi hei rōpu āwhina i ngā ākonga
Māori, kia wāia haere ai ki ngā āhuatanga o te
whare wānanga. Hei tāna, me ū rātou ki te tū
hei tāngata o tēnei ao whānui, engari me Māori
tonu te wairua.
THE BIRTH OF THE FIRST MĀORI ASSOCIATION
at the Wellington campus has already made an
impact in reviving the life of Māori culture to its
former beauty.
The newly formed and growing association,
named Kōkiri Ngātahi, was established at
the beginning of the year with a goal of Māori
students advancing together as one.
As part of the commitment to Māori, Kōkiri
Ngātahi seeks to provide for various academic
advice, guidance, financial advocacy, scholarship advice, access to study, sports teams, Te
Reo classes and fortnightly hui.
With the leadership and assistance of President
Nitika Erueti-Satish, Kōkiri Ngātahi is establishing further “study groups, opportunities
for social events, cultural activities and local,
regional and national representation”.
Progress has been steady, with growing
numbers who attend the fortnightly Wednesday
lunches held in the Whānau Room. At these hui
a few students have shared their views on the
Māori movement, such as “When I first came
to university I didn’t have a sense of belonging.
It’s nice to finally have a place where I can be
around like minded people.”
Te Waka o ngā Akonga (Albany Māori Association) and Manawatahi (Palmerston North
Māori Association) have been examples of
direction for Kōkiri Ngātahi.
Te Waka o ngā Akonga and Manawatahi have
been established Māori associations for a
number of years and all three clubs are looking
forward to collective events.
On the Wellington campus, other associations
are also interested in collaborating events
with Kōkiri Ngātahi. Plans have been made to
strengthen bonds with the Pasifika club with an
event both clubs will enjoy – a huge lunch!
Professor Sir Mason Durie and other kaumātua
on the Wellington campus have expressed their
joy and offered support towards the evolution
of Kōkiri Ngātahi. Professor Durie is pleased
with the development so far, suggesting that the
association will help the students involved with
the club to feel comfortable to study on campus
“as Māori”, while working towards being able to
“actively participate as citizens of the world”.
FLAT PROFILE: RANFELLAS
as would you rather give up cheese or oral
sex, and Lizzy’s Big Decision: Rupert or Matt?
(Duration 30 mins, concluded with Matt).
Our flat’s name is a bit misleading. It suggests
we are all ‘fellas’ but really we are six girls who
love to party. We are Lizzy, Shelley, Laura,
Hannah, Olivia, and Megan.
Meg has an annoying habit of leaving the
water jug empty, and she leaves her blonde
hair everywhere! She once tried to be Mary
Poppins and slid down the stairs rail, and
sliced open her leg. She has a big scar now.
Our landlord is the shit. He was around the
other day planting roses around the windows
(our new security system). He even gave Lizzy
an expensive bottle of champagne for her 21st.
He also lets us have animals.
We have a part-time cat called Baybee. She’s
gangster as. Her owner keeps telling us to stop
letting her into our flat. We still do. We also
have a giant rabbit named Buddy and a puppy
called Griff (on the d low). Tony doesn’t know
about the puppy, though.
When our guy mates get lonely they just ask
for one of the girls’ numbers. Our flat motto
is ‘You snooze you lose’. We came up with
it when Lizzy was seeing a guy who would
always go away on the weekend. She ended
up seeing another dude, and when we asked
massey.ac.nz/massey/student-life/student-exchange-programme
her what happened to the first she said “You
snooze, you lose”.
A recent addition to our flat is the going-up
going-down board. On the up is Christian Grey,
for obvious reasons, Baybee, and hair chalk.
On the way down is Woodville, boys (except
for Ben), and Meg (because she left us to go
on placement for a month – sad face).
Laura invented our yarn book. Because we
get a bit forgetful on the wines, we record
everything down when we get home from
town. It also holds life’s serious questions such
St Patrick’s Day was pretty crazy. We can’t
really remember what happened though.
We have a crazy old lady living next door. She
puts her radio outside and cranks the horse
racing on a Sunday morning to piss us off.
Once noise control got called when we were
having a party, and she had her Trackside
cranking too. The noise control guy didn’t
know who the complaint was for – her or us!
He went and told her to turn her radio down
anyway.
We thought she was dead a few days ago
because she left her washing out all week.
05
IN SHORT
MASSEY SPORT PSYCHOLOGIST MEETS NBA STAR
NZ BODY ART SHOWCASE
STUDYING - A MASSIVE BALANCING ACT
Yvette Morrissey
Massey University sport psychologist Professor Gary
Hermansson had a chance to chat with United States basketball
star Kobe Bryant yesterday, just days after inspiring a Facebook
post by the NBA star.
Professor Hermansson, of the School of Sport and Exercise,
is the New Zealand team’s sport psychologist at the Olympic
Games.
On Friday, Bryant posted a Massey University news release and
video to his Facebook page, asking his 13 million followers to
discuss the ways they dealt with pressure while competing.
The post proved popular, with more than 5000 “likes” and 500
comments. More than 3000 went on to view Professor Hermansson’s video about his role as a sport psychologist.
After hearing about the post, Professor Hermansson sent a
copy of his book Going Mental in Sport: Excelling through Mind
Management to Bryant, who plays for the Los Angeles Lakers and
is representing the United States in London.
They then crossed paths at an event yesterday and chatted
briefly. Professor Hermansson says Bryant approached him after
the function and thanked him for the book.
Professor Hermansson is blogging about his Olympic experience
here: masseyblogs.ac.nz/ghermans
RAMADAN: THE MUSLIM MONTH OF FASTING
By Muhammad Faisal
Auckland’s premiere community light art event,
Art in the Dark, is pleased as punch to present
the Art in the Dark Philips Lighting Design
Competition, with support from AUT.
The competition gives tertiary students from
across New Zealand the opportunity to come
up with a concept for an amazing light installation using Philips lighting products, including
their energy efficient LED lights and light bulbs.
You come up with something we love, and the
organisers give you the products, platform and
your name in lights.
The top 5 entrants + 1 wild-card voted for by the
public will get to present their light installation
concept to a panel of judges. The judges will
decide the top 3 entrants – and these winners
will have the opportunity to turn their dreams
into reality by creating their stunning light installation to be on display at Art in the Dark 2012 for
20,000+ visitors to enjoy.
Art in the Dark is a free, public, illuminated, Art
Festival hosted in Western Park, Ponsonby,
Auckland, on the evenings of November Friday 9
and 10, 2012.
RAMADAN, THE MONTH OF FASTING, IS THE 9TH
month of the Islamic calendar. The fasting starts
when the crescent of the Ramadan is sighted.
In Qur’an, Allah describes the timings and
period of fasting as: You are permitted to eat
and drink (during nights) until you can discern
the white streak of dawn from the blackness of
night. Then, complete your fast till nightfall.
[AlBaqrah: 187]
In Arabic, Ramadan literally means, “scorching
or burning”. Essentially, the reason for fasting
is described in the following verse of Qur’an: “O
you who believe! Fasting has been prescribed
for you just as it was prescribed for the people
before you, so that you may attain piety.”
[AlBaqrah: 183]
Ramadan has a great religious significance for
Muslims since Allah chose this month to reveal
the Qur’an. Muslims fast during the day and join
a special night prayer during which the Qur’an
is recited, which aims to revive and understand
the true message of this book: perfect guidance,
06
wisdom, and a complete decorum of life.
The act of fasting has strong social impacts
as it heeds us towards the hungry around us.
Fasting urges the observer not to speak about
someone negatively, and be polite and kind to
parents, elders, subordinates, and friends. It
is mentioned that whosoever does not leave
forged speech and evil actions, that his/her
fasting won’t be granted.
Ramadan is also a great community time when
people invite each other for breaking fast.
The Massey Muslims Society organises iftaar
(breaking fast) and dinner events at the Massey
Islamic centre with the help of several Muslim
student Associations. So if you have a Muslim
friend or neighbour, this is the time to wish
‘Ramadan Mubarak’ (congratulations for
Ramadan) to them.
Muhammad Faisal can be contacted by email:
mms.president@gmail.com or visit the Massey
Mulsims Society website: www.mmsnz.org
Participants are challenged to be innovative with
their design concepts. Ideas organisers hope
to see include; light installations; interactive
projects; spatial projects; landscape designs;
video works; artworks; performances; kinetic
structures and sculptures.
Enter via the Art in the Dark website competition
entry form. Entrants must submit a paragraph
to explain their art installation concept, provide
sketches/photos/designs of an art installation or
artwork using Philips energy-efficient light bulbs
and LEDs as the principal materials. See the
Philips light products available online at
www.artinthedark.co.nz.
STUDYING IS HARD ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT
having to keep up a social life while doing lastminute prep for exams and live on a diet of
two-minute noodles and toast. MASSIVE talks
to four students who manage to fit studying in
with more difficult circumstances than most.
Studying and balancing debt: Samantha
Scott* finds studying harder than many. She is
part-way through a Bachelor of Arts majoring
in Anthropology with a minor in English, while
struggling to maintain her debt.
“When I was working I got credit cards. I
thought it would be easy to pay them off as I was
still living at home and not paying much in rent.
Then I had a breakdown, and was diagnosed
with quite a few mental health labels, and had
to quit my job. My income reduced to less than
half of what I was getting, and when I moved
out of home I sometimes needed the cards to get
food. Now I’ve maxed them out,” she says.
Samantha started off with $2000 in debt when
starting study, but that has increased to $4000,
not including her student loan.
“I am not dealing with [the debt] that well. I am
keeping up with the monthly payments, however,
the interest keeps me from paying it off.”
Being in this much debt means Samantha
cannot get an overdraft like other students.
Due to her repayments, she also has less cash to
survive on after paying for rent and food.
“Sometimes I am lucky to have one dollar left by
the end of the week,” she says.
Massey offers a budget service for students,
and Samantha is planning on making an
appointment for advice on how to control her
debt, and how to start a savings plan.
But although she is in debt, she still proves
studying is possible.
“Once I complete my degree and get a job,
paying off what I owe is my first priority.”
She offers her advice for students struggling
with debt: “If you can work, get a part-time
job. Cut up your credit cards as they are very
tempting to rely on when you are short on cash.
Necessities always come first, and what money
you are left with may not be much, but that is
the reality of debt.”
Being a parent and studying: Paula Smith*
is a mother to her two-year-old son, David*,
and is halfway through a Bachelor of Nursing.
David goes to day care when Paula is studying,
which she says is “good for his development and
learning.”
She says the hardest part about being a parent
and studying is “when I have the sudden drive
or inspiration to write an assignment, but I
can’t because David needs my attention. “It
is also hard if David gets sick. I would rather
spend the day cuddling him than working on
assignments!”
Once completing her degree, she plans to
become a scrub/surgical nurse.“I know that
once I finish my degree I will have a stable job
with a good income to support my son.”She
gives advice for parents who are thinking
about studying: “You have to be organised and
motivated, but go in knowing that you’re going
to be an inspiration to your kids! It’s hard work
but it’s worth it in the long run.”
Studying with a language barrier: Kelvin Zeng,
as well as many other international students,
struggles with a language barrier. English is
his second language, his first being Cantonese.
Kelvin is studying a Bachelor of Information
Sciences and is in his second year. He finds
using his second language to study challenging.
“Making references for my assignments is hard.
Sometimes I have to ask my friends for help.”
His language barrier hasn’t stopped him from
making many Kiwi friends, and he finds this is
a great way to help with his studies and work on
his English. He hasn’t used any Massey services
for assistance yet, but says everyone he has
encountered has been helpful, and he wouldn’t
hesitate to use these services in the future.
Working full-time and balancing study:
Balancing study while working full-time may
seem an impossible feat to some. However,
Rachel Hope proves it can be done. Rachel
studied a Bachelor of Communications with
a double major in Expressive Arts and Media
Studies (minor in Public Relations), while
working full-time as manager of a retail store.
Like many students, Rachel found working
part-time was not enough to cover expenses
such as rent, food, petrol and bill payments. She
trialled working part-time for her first semester
of study, but then took up a full-time role for the
remainder.
“I would work around 40 hours a week, building
up to some 50-60 hour weeks around sale and
Christmas periods,” she says.
She used her evenings and days off to study,
complete assignments, and catch up on lectures
she missed. She says that despite having the
extra cash, being so busy had its complications.
“Socialising went out the window, and
compulsory tutorials were rather stressful. I had
to drive from work to Massey, find a park, run to
my tutorial, complete the work, run back to my
car, drive back to work, and find a park all in a
lunch hour. It was rough!”
She says having the income to support herself
was what kept her going.
“Working was a nice break from study. It kept
my mind and body active and gave me a chance
to think of something other than study.”
It took her two and a half years to complete her
degree, enrolling in Summer School and also
taking five papers some semesters to speed the
process along. She graduated in May 2011 and
now is working as manager of a gym.
She offers her advice for students considering
studying and working full-time: “We are capable
of more than we think. Studying full-time and
working full-time sounds crazy, but it is also
achievable. I would only recommend it if you
are very focused, love being busy and handle
stress extremely well. Overall, I enjoyed the
challenge!”
*Names have been changed
07
WELLINGTON NOTICES
MASSEY MARKET LAUNCH
A GUIDE TO COFFEE
Ruth Chan reviews her favourite coffee
destinations in Wellington CBD.
MEMPHIS BELLE
Voted Wellington’s Best Café for a reason…
Uber-friendly team of passionate inked up
baristas who offer coffee in all its forms:
syphon, chemex, V60, etc. Great vibes
for good chats and prime spot for talent
scouting.
CUSTOMS
The total caffeine experience with its coffee
grind close to perfection. Its rad, art-deco
atmosphere and optimal outdoor seating
makes this place the go-to-guy when on a
date with a smoker.
SUPERFINO
Waiting for your coffee here is like stepping
into a glamourous 1950’s fashion magazine.
Elegance and class is evident in this venue
as well as its fine blends, idea for your
yo-pro friends.
AUGUST
August is the new salty kid on the block
and run by the people from Milk Crate. Its
gallery-like layout gives you unobstructed
views of the different art pieces on display,
including those working behind the
espresso machine.
MIDNIGHT ESPRESSO
Convenience in its late hours can be
justified when alcohol just isn’t giving you
that energy-kick, complete with awesome
vege and vegan options. Top coffee or pin
ball matches until 3am, 363 days of the year.
08
Annabel Hawkins
SHORT OF WALKING DOWN CUBA ST WITH RACKS
trying to sell off their clothes, Massey student
Sophie Deans and friend Rosie Broughton
have collaborated to set up the university’s first
student market.
It’s set to run from 10am till 2pm on Wednesday
September 18 in the new Te Ara Hihiko building.
And it’s free for all students to set up their own
stalls – tables and racks provided.
Anything goes, aside from selling food, although
Deans says she wants to keep it to a high
standard.
“We want it to be cool. It’s such an awesome
platform to showcase what you’ve made, what
you’ve collected and anything second-hand
you want to sell. Aside from that, anything and
everything’s welcome.
“Students are in-touch with what’s cool, with
what sells. We know what we want so it’s a great
opportunity to make that happen.”
On the heels of the wave of online shopping and
trading schemes, the pair wanted an honest,
sustainable space where students could engage
in creative conversation and see what’s going
down across the university.
“You’ll know what you’re getting, you can see it,
and you can talk to whoever owned it or made it.
It’s honest and face-to-face. Massey’s all about
that.”
Thanks to the new Clubs Development Officer
Anna Hobman, with support from Events
Manager Mike Ross, the market has full support
from the university, so now all it needs now is
you.
The market follows the opening of the Creative
arts building, Te Ara Hihiko, celebrating a
collaborative space for all schools across the
campus. Deans says the market isn’t just for
design students, but an event for everyone to
contribute.
Providing it is a success, the market will run as a
part of each semester’s O-Weeks next year.
The Massey Market falls in the middle of week
8, following the mid-semester break. Take the
time out to get crafting or get together that
hoard of second-hand clothes and op-shop gems
you’ve accumulated over the years and set up a
stall. It’s a free, easy way to showcase your stuff
and make some money. Eftpos will be available
on the day, and stall-holders are encouraged to
bring their own cash float.
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
CLUBS FEED
EXPRESSIVE ARTS CLUB
The Expressive Arts Club is underway with its
first Arts on Wednesday’s event on the 22nd of
August, at the Wellington Campus (Theatre lab
5D14) at 1pm.
The event features students from Making Plays
for Theatre presenting a staged reading of
excerpts from American playwright Catherine
Filloux’s new play, Luz.
Filloux is an award-winning writer whose
plays explore issues concerning human rights.
Lecturer Emma Willis explains “Luz explores the
stories of women forced to flee their homelands
because of violence, only to encounter a different
kind of violence in the process of migration.”
Filloux has asked a number of different groups
around the world to hold staged readings in
anticipation of the work's premiere at La MaMa
Theatre in New York late September this year.
In New Zealand Massey students from 139224
will present this reading. Later in the semester
they will stage their own creative responses to
the play's themes and issues.
Everyone is welcome to come and enjoy the
reading from the talented Catherine Filloux,
support fellow students and make the most of
free lunchtime refreshments.
MACS
How good is it when someone says a sincere
thank you. Often our teachers here at Massey
get little recognition for their hard work. So
for the first time this year MACS wants to say
a massive public THANK-YOU to one faculty
member of the Bachelor of Communication as
voted by YOU.
MONTEREY – CHEESEBURGER HEAVEN: Monterey
is a small bar restaurant near the corner of
Adelaide Rd and Rintoul St in Newtown. It’s
charming in a brick-a-brac market sort of
way. Behind the bar is an eclectic mix of liquor
bottles, cocktail shakers and old vinyl. The walls
are stencilled and the floor is carpeted. The
tables are covered in pattern paper held down
by bulldog clips, and there are old sardine cans
to hold pencils: feel free to doodle.
Tuesday night is $10 burger night. Get there
early and be prepared to wait. But, boy, it
is worth the wait. All burgers are served on
ciabatta style bread with crispy, well-seasoned
fries. Try the halloumi with onion rings and
barbeque sauce, pulled pork with apple kraut
or cajun chicken with ‘slaw and barbeque sauce,
or maybe the old-fashioned cheeseburger with
a beef pattie, aged cheddar, pickles, and relish.
The cheeseburger really is king here – aged
cheddar is the key. The chefs might have been
over-zealous with the barbeque sauce – I’d like
to actually taste the halloumi and the chicken.
But eat these burgers with your hand, soak up
the juices with the fries, and mop your plate
with the bread. Go on. Harriet Lowe
TURNING TEA INTO AN EXPERIENCE
Is there someone you think deserves to be
rewarded for their hard work? Then email
macdreamers@gmail.com with the name of
your nominee, the paper they tutor, lecture or
coordinate, and why you think they deserve to
win the MACS Teacher of the Year 2012.
You must be a current student at Massey
(student I.D# please) and you may submit an
individual or group nomination. Nominate as
many people as you like but you can nominate
the same person only once. Please indicate if
you want your nomination to remain anonymous.
The winner will receive a trophy, a certificate
with all the nice things you guys say about them,
and a gift from MACS at an award ceremony on
campus in week 10.
Olivia Marsden
A PURE LOVE FOR TEA IS WHAT IGNITED THE
business dreams of Massey entrepreneur Katie
Hammond.
Katie launched her fair-trade tea business, KTea,
in 2010 after taking Massey’s enterprise development paper for which she had to design her
own business plan. Her inspiration was sparked
on her first visit to Dunedin’s Farmers’ Market
where the smell of loose tea leaves lured her.
“After that first cup, I was in love,” she says.
She saw a definite gap for a Fair Trade product,
and using her business degree and the support
of an entrepreneur uncle and her family
(“allowing me to fill the spare room with boxes
of tea leaves and spices”), KTea was under way,
beginning with Fair Trade.
“I want to create a product that is good for you
but good for those who produce it as well”.
Finding Fair Trade suppliers as well as working
to support her growing business were definite
challenges, but Katie says the challenges
produce the constant highlights.
Once KTea’s stall at Frank Kitts underground
market was luring its own crowds, Katie was
able to export larger amounts of tea leaves
directly from Sri Lanka, organic and Fair
Trade-certified.
KTea’s spices are from the South Island, and
also organic. They are blended in a commercial
kitchen near her Upper Hutt home, and it’s this
artistic faculty that makes her beam: VelveTea
Vanillla - Black tea with real vanilla pod; DelectabiliTea - Green tea with hibiscus flowers and
rosehips; ZeeTea - Green tea with chamomile
and lavender.
Competing with the strong Wellington coffee
culture is a focus for KTea, but Katie thinks the
appreciation for good-quality tea is growing.
At a time where everything is so fast paced,
“Tea enables you to sit there and take a moment
compared to on-the-go coffee ... take a moment
and enjoy a cuppa tea”.
PROVOCATIVE ART WINS AWARD
HANNAH SALMON, A TWENTY TWO YEAR-OLD
Massey University fine arts student from
Wellington, has won a 2012 New Zealand Art
Show Emerging Artist Award. She will receive
$3000, thanks to the NZ Affordable Arts Trust,
NZAAT, and the generosity of trustee/patron
Richard Nelson.
The executive director of NZAAT and the
New Zealand Art Show, Carla Russell, says
“Hannah works across an impressive range of
platforms and has actively brought art out into
the community. We look forward to seeing her
work in the New Zealand Art Show this August.”
Ms Salmon’s art practice spans zine and comic
publishing, posters for musicians and record
labels, and exhibitions in galleries and project
spaces. Her art is political and provocative,
seeking to use the power of art to spur social
change. For example, her zine Daily Secretion
often satirises powerful people and institutions,
and won the Wellington Zinefest Best in Fest
award in 2010. She has been instrumental in
founding the Concerned Citizens art collective
and two community-based gallery spaces, the
Garrett Street Gallery and the 19 Tory Street
Open-Source Community Gallery.
She says the award is a huge boost: “I feel very
privileged. I think it’s great that the relationship
between art and activism is being recognised at
a time of social and economic upheaval. I look
forward to the opportunities to engage with
both the art world and the wider community
this award will provide.”
09
PALMERSTON NORTH NOTICES
WOMEN’S FOOTBALL TEAM MAKES FINAL
Trent Pedley
NOTICES
UNISIFE TEAM THIRD AT NATIONALS
The names Nest
Egg, Accountable
Accountants, and SIFE
Impromptu may mean
absolutely nothing
to you, but these three initiatives led the
Massey University SIFE team to third place
in this year’s SIFE (Students in Free Enterprise) nationals.
Eleven students travelled to Auckland to
compete in the competition on July 14.
In addition to their placing they received
the SIFE spirit award for outstanding team
dynamics.
SIFE is an organisation that works to create
change in the community. The students
coordinate with local business leaders to
implement initiatives in their area.
Nest Egg, the first of the three initiatives
put forward by the Massey team, is a
programme designed to teach intermediate students the value of saving. The
second initiative, Accountable Accountants,
involves accounting students offering advice
to non-profit organisations to help them
improve their accounting systems. The third,
SIFE Impromptu, involves the replanting of
200 trees at Skoglund Park. The group is
also working with local councils to protect
the native plants on Massey Hill.
These ideas were well received by the
judges and the group received a lot of
positive comments. The judging panel
included the CEOs of Coca-Cola Amatil and
Foodstuffs, and a partner of KPMG.
SIFE Vice-President Emma Wilson says the
nationals were an invaluable experience.
“We got to meet prominent business
leaders and like-minded students, and gain
contacts and skills that will assist us beyond
our time at Massey University.”
Emma has been a member of SIFE for six
months and says it was awesome to see
how much the students involved had grown
in skill and confidence when they competed
at nationals.
For more information about SIFE, send an
email to: sife.massey@gmail.com
10
THE MASSEY WOMEN’S FOOTBALL TEAM, DESPITE
being the underdogs in the semi-final, have
made it through to the final of the ASB Women’s
Cup knockout.
Gemma Lindegren, the Clubs and Activities
officer at Massey, said the girls “have done
amazingly well” and have been “consistently
performing over the past four years”.
This year they faced more than their fair share
of pressure, not just from tough competition
in Hamilton in the semi-final, but from the
financial strain of hiring the Green Room at the
Rugby Istitute so they could train.
Coach Simon Lees said the training grounds
“take a hammering over the winter. We tried
training last week outside and nearly had to call
training off because it was that muddy.”
It doesn’t make things any easier for the team
that the Central League is based in Wellington,
meaning they have to travel every second week
at their own cost, and then to Hamilton for the
semi.Lindegren said the Hokowhitu campus
grounds “have not been up to regulation
standards,” and the team had to use Memorial
as their home ground. Though this ensured a
good playing surface, the team had to pay for it
out of their own pockets.
Also, the Relay for Life, which is hosted at
Hokowhitu with no barriers around the pitch a
week or two before the competition starts, left it
in an unplayable condition.
This year has been “particularly hard” for the
girls, although she had secured extra funding
for Massey’s elite teams from MUSA.
But because most teams and clubs are affiliated
to MUSA, all charitable trust grants go through
MUSA with all of the association’s applications.
Lindegren said they needed “more positive role
models”, and having one of the top women’s
teams in the country is “empowering to young
females,” but we need to be “supporting the
women’s team”.
The team is leading the Lotto Women’s Central
League by five points. Three Kings United, who
will be their opponents, are leading the Northern
Region Women’s League by three points. Three
Kings United have won all 12 of their games,
while Massey has won 11 and drawn one.
What’s even more pressing is that Three Kings
have two Olympic players, six under 20’s, and
five under 17’s. Massey have no current New
Zealand players.
Coach Lees said the girls “worked extremely,
extremely hard, and their hard work has paid
off”.
The venue for the final will be decided by the
location of the men’s final, but will be in either
Auckland, Wellington, or Dunedin.
Lees’s one word to describe how he feels about
the girls results this season was “ecstatic. It’s the
first time a central team has got to the final.”
CLUBS FEED
YOUNG GREENS
The Young Greens have had a relaxing year so far
after winding down from the election, but they
are starting to roll up their sleeves as they start to
focus on the no-asset sales referendum petition.
The club is a subsidiary of the Green Party.
“We provide a younger view of politics to the
Green Party. We comment on policy, have
debates, make submissions, and educate others
about Green Party politics and policy,” says
member Adam Canning.
The Young Greens meet on a semi-regular basis
but run only when they feel the need.
“It depends what our focus is at the time or
what’s happening politically.”
If you would like to see New Zealand be
“sustainable and awesome,” why not join?
The Young Greens are looking for new members
and is open to all, so contact either Megan Hunt
via email: masseyyounggreens@gmail.com or
Adam Canning on 027667960.
TECHENSOC
With more than 100 members in Palmerston
North, Techensoc (Technology and Engineering
Society) offers a wide range of networking
opportunities.
The highlight of this year was the Mock CV
night, where members were interviewed by
professionals as they would in the real world.
Techensoc isn’t all that serious, though. The
club allows engineering students to be able
to socialise outside university, and there will
always be someone willing to help answer any
engineering questions.
Techensoc hosted a ball on August 4 at the
Convention Centre. This was open to all, and
last year more than 160 attended. Member
Chris Barstead says it’s usually a good night.
Each half semester, Techensoc also host a
couple of lunches. They understand it’s pretty
busy trying to be an engineer so they hold one
or two events a semester.
“A lot of people think it’s the engineers’ club, but
it’s not exclusive. It’s for friends to do fun stuff
outside of uni. Relaxing with a few brews is good
for a student at the end of the day,” says Chris.
For more information contact Chris Barstead:
techensoc@massey.ac.nz or during the
Wednesday common break from 12pm-2pm in
the Riddet Complex Atrium by the bus stop.
RUGBY RIVALRY OVER
TOILET SEAT TROPHY
The annual rugby rivalry between Massey
and Lincoln universities kicks off again as the
LA Brooks Cup rugby match looms closer.
Lincoln will be travelling to the Massey
University Palmerston North campus for
the match set to take place on Saturday,
September 22.
The LA Brooks Cup first arose in 1952 as a
competition between New Zealand’s two
agricultural colleges, Massey and Lincoln.
The cup was a regular feature until 1966
where it took a 39-year hiatus before its
revival in 2005.
The cup, also known as the Mrs LA Brooks
Cup, was apparently named in honour of
the mother of former Lincoln student Harold
Brooks. The winning team also receives the
famed ‘Mog Shield’, a wooden trophy bearing
a startling resemblance to a toilet seat.
The competition is open only to students
currently studying an agriculture-related
course, so although Massey has broadened
its programmes to become a comprehensive
university, those studying other courses will
have to cheer on their team from the sidelines.
The game kicks off at 2:30pm on the SRI
fields. There will be a free sausage sizzle for
supporters as well as a cash bar. UNITY AND DIVERSITY
UNITY AND DIVERSITY (U&D) WILL BE HELD
at the Globe Theatre on August 18 with two
performances – the matinee at 1pm and the
evening performance at 7pm.
U&D’s aim is to celebrate the variety of cultures
on campus and the cultures that exist within
Massey University and Palmerston North, with
performances by those groups.
For the first time in a while it’s being organised
by one person. Lynelle Munns, who has stepped
into the recently created role of club support
person, will be taking this on with some pretty
big ambitions. She does, however, have the
support of the committee which has organised
it in the past.
The event used to he hosted at The Regent on
Broadway, but over the years it has downsized.
Lynelle hopes to make it “bigger and return it to
its former glory”.
Last year there were a range of performances
by Malaysia, Indonesia, Pasifika, Papua New
Guinea, Merlion, Massey Choir, and the Fire Club.
Though U&D typically has an international
focus, any club can enter. To give a wider
focus, Lynelle is inviting clubs from the Massey
Wellington campus.
She has big plans wanting to extend invites to
school groups “once this one is out of the way”.
“This year we are waiting on the clubs to see
what they will have, and what students they will
have next semester.”
So, if you represent a club and want to showcase
your stuff, Unity and Diversity could be what
you’re after. Ticket prices are to be confirmed.
For further information, contact:
Lynelle Munns, MUSA Clubs support officer
06 3504500 ext 81155, clubsupport@musa.org.nz
11
ALBANY NOTICES
MASSEY ALBANY STUDENT HAS
PARALYMPIC MEDAL IN HIS SIGHTS
POWER CUTS AFFECT CAMPUS
An afternoon power cut at the Albany East
Precinct campus on Friday August 3 forced
students and staff members to evacuate the
campus, with classes and meetings cancelled.
The outage was reportedly caused by an
exploding transformer at the main entrance,
one of the campus’s three transformers.
“The explosion was very loud,” said Amy, a
2nd year business student. “I got to leave class
early. I guess I can’t complain about a long
weekend!”
The outage also severely interrupted an event
that the university student bar, The Ferguson,
was due to host. “It was challenging for us,”
said owner Andrew Waite. “We were halfway
through setting up the sound system, the staff
had arrived and were getting ready for the
night. Overall, we lost money as we still had to
pay for the setup and the performers. We got
the rug pulled out from underneath us but it
was just one of those things.”
Insurance cover has reportedly changed since
the Christchurch earthquakes, meaning The
Ferguson was unable to claim insurance for
business interruption.
“I’m happy to say that the event still went on in
a bar in Auckland City,” said Waite. “The people
who paid for tickets still got to see what they
had paid for and we did everything to ensure
that it would still be a good night.
“A lot of people were unhappy because it’s
easy to come to Ferg’s, whereas it is a bit of
a hassle organising transport into the city, but
there wasn’t an alternative, except to cancel,
and we didn’t want to have to do that.”
The university IT team and Vector worked
overnight to restore power for the weekend.
Power was also lost to the accommodation
at nearby Millennium Village, though it was
restored several hours later, while the other
Albany campus, Oteha Rohe, was unaffected.
12
MASSEY UNIVERSITY BUSINESS STUDENT DANIEL
Holt’s personal motto is: “No one ever said it was
going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it.”
It’s a phrase that has held him in good stead as
he prepares for his first Paralympics at the end
of this month.
Born with a condition called albinism, the
swimmer has only around one-tenth of the
vision of a person with normal sight. He is
also extremely sensitive to bright lights, so the
sunnier the day the less he is able to see.
“It affects my swimming by making it harder to
spot the wall and, at the start of the lap, I can’t
really judge my distance into the wall. If it’s an
outdoor pool, it’s even worse,” he says.
The condition also creates challenges in other
aspects of his life. He can’t drive, and has to
carefully plan out walking routes with safe
crossings, or organise rides with friends. He
says being organised is something he learned
from a very young age, and it’s helped out
enormously in later life, including at university.
“As a student at first, I found it a little bit harder.
But once you have learnt where everything is,
and you have networked with people who are
willing to help you, it doesn’t hold you back
too much,” he says. “It’s just about working out
systems that work for you, whether it’s getting
your notes in advance, or just being a little more
organised than most people. I like the Albany
campus. I find it easy to get around, it’s not too
big and everyone around here is really friendly.
With the College of Business everything is
located in one area so it’s only really learning
[the layout] of a small part of the university.”
Daniel is a real contender for a medal at the
London Paralympics in his strongest event, the
400m freestyle. He came fifth at the 2010 World
Championships and believes he has gone from
strength to strength since then.
“I’ve done a lot of work over the past few months
and my times are coming down, so I am hoping
to be extremely competitive in London,” he says.
London is his first Paralympics, a considerable achievement when you consider he
began swimming competitively only in 2007.
Eight months after joining the North Shore
Swimming Club he competed at the IBSA World
Youth Games in Colorado, and returned to New
Zealand with four gold medals.
Four years ago, competing at the London Paralympics was just a pipe dream. “I didn’t really
think it would be achievable in four years, I
was looking more towards Rio. But I put in the
extra effort and worked hard, and it paid off.
It’s going to be a great Games, and I am really
looking forward to it.”
Post-London, Daniel says he will take stock and
decide whether he will continue swimming until
the 2016 Paralympics in Rio de Janeiro. At this
stage he would like to, and in the shorter term,
he is also keen to get back into his studies.
While graduation is still a long way off, he is
grateful for the flexibility of being able to study
part-time while pursuing his sporting career.
“I chose to study at Massey because of how
flexible they were. I spoke to other universities
but I could see that Massey was going to be the
most accommodating,” he says. “I’ve formed
good relationships with my lecturers so my
notes are always there when I need them, and
if I need an extension it doesn’t seem to be a
problem.”
Whether it’s competing in the swimming pool
or in the world of business, Daniel believes his
albinism has given him an advantage because
he has developed key life skills at an early age.
“Because you are always being faced with
problems, you are used to figuring it out, while
others might struggle a bit more. You also
develop time management skills because you
need to plan your day. You know what you want
to set out to do – in sport and life that helps a
lot,” he says.
“And when people doubt you, you have to step
up and prove them wrong, and by doing that
you show yourself what you can do, and it gives
you more confidence. Nobody said it’s going to
be easy so, at the end of the day, what you get
out is what you put in.”
LETTERS
LETTERS
MASSIVE magazine welcomes letters of all
shapes and sizes, They should be emailed
to letters@massivemagazine.org.nz though they
can be dropped into any student association office. The Editor reserves the right to
edit, abridge, or just plain bastardise them,
and will refuse any that are in bad taste or
defamatory. Pseudonyms may be used.
YO HOOK US UP WITH SOME COFFEE
To Massive Magazine
I have no coffee in my cupboard and am too
lazy to go to the shops. Can you please print this
letter so I can have a free bag? I think I deserve
points for honesty.
Coffeeluva89
CASUAL RACISM, IS IT REALLY RACISM?
I recently encounted a disturbing situation.
A well intentioned, community event that I was
lucky enough to be part of ended in disaster
when a casual joke was taken with far too much
gravity turning said jolly shindig into somewhat
of a racial boxing match more suitable to the
2012 London Olympics than a back yard bbq!
Since when was the good old English, Irish and
Aussie joke to be given the same weight as the
ignorrant rants of a cross burning neo - nazi?
What has the world come to?
Where did this generation of highly strung, PC,
nipple twisters come from? In my opinion they
all need a good bog wash and a dose of cod liver
oil! Asking an Aussie to say ‘fesh’n’cheps’ is
hardly the same as making a middle aged negro
woman sit at the back of the bus!
Maybe the average Kiwi couldnt care less if they
got called a sheep shagger, partly because its
only a silly generalisation and partly because a
freshly shorn Romley Cross would stir the loins
of any true blooded New Zealander.
Either way, the average New Zealander doesnt
mean any offence by a good hearted ribbing
aimed at our less fortunate - accented
hombres. Those of you who choose to take
offence at our friendly joshing should keep an
eye out for the comedy police and their testie
twisting bog washers - now you shall have no pie!
P.S. All Frenchmen smell.
14
TWO’S COMPANY THREES A CROWD
To Peter Jackson (because I’m sure he reads
Massive and I don’t know his email address)
When Bilbo Baggins sat down and decided to
write a lovely little book called, ‘There and Back
Again’ he wrote it by hand with a ink pen. As
such it is actually quite a short book and while
Bilbo was happy to sell the reproduction rights
to J.R Tolkein, mainly because he was no longer
getting long life from the one ring and realised
that he needed money to live out his last days
wherever that elf boat took him in luxury, I am
certain that a trilogy of movies was not what he
had in mind.
The thing is the book is like 200 pages long,
which would mean that each movie would cover
off like 70 pages of the book. In film class we
were told that one page equals around 1 minute
of film, so this must be the most in-depth film
adaptation of a short book ever devised. I also
think I have found the problem, I spoke with
Bilbo the other day on Skype. Bilbo (or as his
skype name calls him: ‘xX Precious Bagman
xX’ said that he could not recall meeting a
Legolas in his journey. I thought this was odd as
Orlando Bloom has been seen acting like a big
shot spending up large in the $2 shops around
Wellington shouting with a crew that walks in
front of him constantly shouting, ‘oh shit here
comes Legolas son everybody look over there’
which is what he did when Lord of the Rings
was being shot, so one can only assume that he
has been cast in the trilogy when he didn’t even
appear in the text.
Bilbo was like hmmmmmm, that would mean
that he would have been well clued up on the
ring, and Bilbo when he met them in Rivendale
in the other film, yeah….that’s not canon.
Then he started to cry and said, what have I
done? I sold out, the ring finally corrupted me
and I became what I always hated. He tried to
hide it but had the video on the skype call. It
felt awkward. I hung up. He called back but I
pressed ignore.
I guess my laboured point here is that, aside
from spacing the films into a trilogy to create the
world’s largest money fort, why spend all this
time adding characters that make little sense to
the film and just stick to the story, and if you are
going to add characters that make no sense –
why not add some better ones.
The Hobbit will be much cooler with the
addition of King Leonidus from 300, Maximus
from Gladiator, Tyrion Lannister, Judge Dread
or even Optimus Prime…or a combination of all
of them.
More people would turn up to see a butchery
then a accurate rendition.
Or you could make some original movies for
once.
OMFG - Why a effin Trilogy? (hey that rhymes)
BULL RUSH SHOULD BE AN OLYMPIC SPORT
Now I’m not saying the Olympics aren’t a great
sporting event. Its cool to flick on Prime at any
time of the day and seeing top sports people
doing what they do best, but there is something
missing. That good old kiwi classic, bull rush. I
like to think that after the closing ceremony all
the teams pick one of their best athletes to head
out behind the stadium, away from pesky drug
testing officials where some good old fashioned
grudge match tackling action.
Forget the medals, just imagine the politics.
New Zealand would probably only go after
Australia, then after three or four attempts will
bring it down then talk about being the best
tackler, ‘per capita’.
Then Australia will buddy up with America, who
is having a hell of a time after being steamrolled
by the plucky Vietnamese with a killer sidestep
and a mean fend.
England will spend its time being pounded
by all the other countries they used to own in
some kind of strange retribution before teaming
up with the rest of Europe and group tackling
Germany who was making a strong showing
against the other Europeans because hey, old
habits die hard.
But what would be really interesting is who
would be picked last, and why? There are two
theories on who is picked last, one is that it’s the
biggest, baddest guy and you need everyone to
bring him down, or it’s the kid that no-one likes
and you need everyone to bring him down hard
to teach him a lesson.
Looking at the current spread of the Olympics it
would probably have to be Jamaica, the size and
power of their sprinters would terrify any would
be tackler and the fact that when they line up
to sprint everyone is pretty much treating silver
as gold cos there’s no chance. Some of those
athletes will be looking for payback for their
wasted time learning how to sprint, problem is
the plucky little country will probably be the one
that makes it through the bull rush and gloat
about how cool they are, and its probably well
deserved.
As Usain Bolt says, ‘smallest country biggest
heart.’
But seriously, how cool was the 100m finals.
Now imagine that with tackling.
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17
Throughout the trial of Ewen MacDonald, defence lawyer Greg King dominated our television screens. In a rare,
spare moment in his hectic schedule he talks with Julia Hollingsworth about the way the media covers trials, his
desire to increase the public’s knowledge of the justice system, and his endless stream of bizarre hate mail.
q
reg King sits at his large, sun-lit
desk wearing a navy “United States
of America” hoodie. Boxes of files
and folders are strewn around his
designer orange couches, but there’s still
a feeling of airiness in his vast Lower Hutt
office. The walls are packed with pictures;
there’s a sketch of University of Otago’s clock
tower, a picture of his two daughters, and a
photo of his best friend, Bernie Fraser (an
ex-All Black and Brooke Fraser’s father), in
a Fight for Life competition.
The owner of a small law practice and one
of New Zealand’s most prominent defence
lawyers, King has come a long way from his
early beginnings. He was born to teenage
parents and grew up in a state house in
Whanganui. It was a happy childhood, he
says. “There didn’t seem to be any stigma
attached to being in a state house. It was
just how we lived.” After completing high
THE CASE FOR THE DEFENCE
school as head boy, he went to law school
at the University of Otago, took a job at a
commercial law firm, and then landed a
three-year internship with Judith AblettKerr.
For someone who recently defended Ewen
Macdonald in a trial-cum-media circus, he
looks incredibly relaxed. He’s just back from
Palmerston North, he tells me, defending
a client accused of a double homicide. The
week before, he was defending a client in
Hamilton accused of careless driving causing
death. It’s nothing new. Over the course of
his career, his clients have included Clayton
Weatherston, Antonie Dixon, Peter Ellis,
Scott Watson, and John Barlow.
Needless to say, he has received a fair amount
of media attention. But he laments that
the attention is rarely balanced and evenhanded. “I think the coverage of big trials
is, by and large, appalling,” he says. The
coverage of the Scott Guy trial, in particular,
was widely criticised for turning the trial
into a soap opera, and for referencing works
of fiction. “It’s a soap opera, it’s Shortland
Street,” he says, although he notes that Stuff.
co.nz reported on the trial well. King himself
incurred the disdain of media commentators
when he referred to the trial as a “whodunit”
– although he adds that the phrase was “used
in law long before Agatha Christie ever came
along”.
King has also called the media’s crazed
interest in the case racist, arguing that the
media was interested only because the key
players were beautiful and white. He adds
that he’s had horrendous cases that never
made the news, such as a cannibal murderer
who bit off the end of a man’s penis.
+
17
FEATURE
BUT IS THERE REALLY A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
the media drawing in the public with snappy
headlines and literary references, and King’s
‘showmanship’ in his bid to keep the jury
interested in his closing speech?
“I think there’s a huge difference,” he says.
“I’m doing my job to assist a jury to make an
extremely difficult decision in a case that has
severe and profound consequences. To draw
the viewers in, obviously the media are going
to sex it up. Do I respect that? No, because
it’s not a soap opera – it’s real. It’s real people
and real situations.”
As well as salacious headlines and tearful
pictures, the media have been accused of
holding ‘trial by media’, deciding on an
accused’s guilt themselves.
He is unsure how much effect skewed
media coverage can have on the outcome of
a trial. Some instances – such as releasing
information about prior convictions – can
obviously affect a case’s outcome. But
reporting that seems to condemn the accused
may not necessarily affect the verdict. “I have
been involved in a number of very, very highprofile trials where I thought the jury would
not be able to distance themselves from the
bad publicity to reach a proper verdict on the
evidence. I have been pleasantly wrong.”
The main problem with media and trials, he
says, is the possibility that jury members may
read the press and absorb a media commentator’s opinion. Of this, he says diplomatically: “It’s naïve to think it’s never done, but
it’s equally naïve to think it’s always done.”
Though the public may become embroiled
in an all-out 21st Century witch-hunt,
18
King has to remain unemotional about his
clients. Regardless of what a client has done
- or alleged to have done - King maintains a
professional relationship with them all. “I’ve
never patted anyone on the back and said
‘well done, that’s a good thing you’ve done’,
but you have to appreciate and understand
their frailties, and their own circumstances
that have lead them to do things.”
He compares his client-relationship to that
of a surgeon’s. Just as a surgeon will still try
to do a perfect job even if they dislike their
patient, King works hard for his clients even
if he thinks they’re scum. “You just have to do
your job, regardless of what you might think
about them in another world.”
He finds that paedophiles are often
wonderful clients - “often they’re very, very
charming - it’s an occupational requirement.”
Drug addicts, on the other hand, are terrible
clients - “they’re late, they’ll steal from you if
you look away”.
I couldn’t help but ask what his relationship
with the universally hated Clayton Weatherston was like. “On the occasions that I met
him, we got along very well.”
As a high-profile defence lawyer, King is
never short of mail. He received plenty of
correspondence in the weeks of the Scott Guy
trial and after it - he estimates about 500
people contacted him to share their opinion.
There are the people who try to help, there
are psychics who claim to have the key to the
trial, and there are people who offer leads.
“For the Scott Guy case, we have 15 Eastlight
folders of puppy sightings … How do you
discourage people from doing that when at
the end of the day maybe they have got the
key to the case?”
He also gets plenty of letters from prison
inmates. They’ll cite the quote from his
website (“injustice anywhere is a threat to
justice everywhere”) and claim that their
case is that injustice. He pulls out a letter
that arrived that week, written in beautiful
swirling calligraphy on lined refill, requesting
that he take a look at the prisoner’s case.
It’s not all fan mail, of course. He is often
told while walking down the road that he will
“burn in hell”, and he’s had his fair share of
hate mail. One man wrote a diatribe calling
him all sorts of adjectives across four emails,
finishing with “You are an evil little man”. So
he emailed him back saying, “I resent that.
I’m not little - I’m 6”2 and 104kg”. He laughs,
his brown eyes sparkling. “We actually
engaged in dialogue over a couple of days,
and it actually got quite humorous. We got to
a point where he eventually apologised and I
said, ‘nothing to apologise for, good on you
for expressing your opinions’.”
King’s bravado seems genuine - he doesn’t
appear to take his unsavoury contact with
the public too seriously. “For me, that’s just
meaningless drivel. It’s bizarre to me the
mentality of the person who would actually
take the time to write to a lawyer.”
Given the type of people he represents, it’s
not surprising there’s a lot of interest in him.
But what is interesting is the lack of understanding about what he does. “I think the
public are completely ignorant, by and large,
about how the courts work, why they work,
what people do, the work, the roles people
Illustrations by Adam Dodd
play in it. There’s astonishing ignorance to it.”
It’s true of many professions - quantum
physics, to name one - but the difference, he
says, is that a quantum physicist’s work isn’t
publically scrutinised and debated. “They
see snippets of our work and they judge us
accordingly. They see snippets of the case
and they therefore think they are experts,
and they’re not … everyone’s entitled to their
opinion. But obviously, there are informed
opinions, and there are uninformed opinions.
“There’s a tendency of people who don’t
know better to attribute the sins of the client
to the lawyer,” he says. He thinks the word
“defending” may mislead people at times. “It
has all sorts of moral connotations to it. In
a sense it’s correct, but I just think it’s open
to misunderstanding. You’re not condoning
what they have done, you’re assisting the
court to see that the right conclusion is
reached on all of the evidence.
“There’s a real lack of appreciation about the
rules under which we operate … I find it quite
frustrating at times that people don’t have
enough insight.”
+
IMPROVING THE PUBLIC’S KNOWLEDGE OF THE
system is one of King’s passions, not least of
all because he believes the legal system is so
important to democracy. “It’s an important
job I do - it’s not curing cancer, let’s not blow
it out of perspective - but it’s an important,
absolutely necessary job. And anyone who
values democracy in any form will know
that the strongest measure of democracy
is the strength of the independent bar [the
defence].”
Despite that, people from democratic
countries are sometimes outraged when
people accused of horrendous crimes get a
trial. It’s not an uncommon sentiment that
Anders Brievik, who confessed to killing 77
people in Norway a year ago, should have
been just locked away rather than put his
victims’ families and survivors of the shooting
through the pain again. But King believes a
desire for the “public good” never overrides
the need for a fair trial. “If you do that, you’re
bringing in some sort of moral witch-sniffing
ability, which we just don’t have as humans.
A trial is about assessing the evidence.”
He is adamant that to make media coverage
better - and as a result, to educate the public
- cameras need to be removed from the court.
He also thinks court reporters should be a
dedicated host of freelance journalists who
then make their reporting available to the
various media outlets.
He’s so passionate about educating the public
about the justice system that he has dabbled
in two television shows - What’s Your
Verdict and The Court Report - and spoken
at the Sensible Sentencing Trust, all with
mixed results. What’s your verdict presented
evidence from old New Zealand cases to new
juries and watched them battle to reach a
verdict. The programme was recently criticised by Radio New Zealand’s Colin Peacock
for being just as salacious as the media
coverage King had criticised.
“It’s not something I’m proud of,” he admits.
“Sadly, it dropped the ball, and it became a
titillating display of people’s misery.” He
sighs that what he’d really like to do is write a
book for the families of those who have been
murdered, and for murderers, explaining
the steps of the justice system for them.
But any educating he will do has to fit around
his busy schedule, which includes a murder, a
sex case with multiple complainants, and two
manslaughter cases before the end of the year.
With the perpetual flood of violent and dire
cases, does he ever become depressed about
humanity? “Yup,” he says, without missing a
beat. So how does he deal with it? “I drink too
much. Speaking of which, do you want a beer?”
The beers are in a fridge in another room
where front pages featuring his clients
are mounted on boards. One wall features
Barlow, another set, waiting to be hung up,
cover the Scott Guy trial. He points to a
Dominion Post front page that pictures Anna
Macdonald and Kylie Guy sobbing, with the
headline ‘Tears at the dock’. “I mean, that just
infuriates me,” he says. “For one, they weren’t
in the dock they were in the witness box.”
We resume our seats, his feet now propped on
his desk, while we discuss why he loves law.
“For me, law was about the courts, and representing the little guy – and the little gal.” He
points out that with law there’s something
for everyone – whether your interest is flying
planes or mountain-climbing - “You wanna
climb Mt Everest, you need a lawyer long
before you need a Sherpa.” In King’s case
his interest was always humans, and battling
for the underdog. “My whole life I’ve been
inspired by people who have stood up against
a regime or a system and fought for change.”
19
FEATURE
It’s an issue that pops up from time to time, usually in the pubs among members of the ‘old guard’.
But recently the debate for New Zealand becoming a republic has been heating up. The republicanism
movement in New Zealand is being fuelled by the royal family’s lack of political relevance. But will that mean
a change is on the cards anytime soon? James Greenland looks into the history of The Crown’s influence in
New Zealand, how it has shaped the country, and if it’s time to become a republic.
REPUBLIC DEBATE – A MATTER OF TIME?
After 172 years, the Queen of England remains New Zealand’s highest authority, regardless of the monarchy’s dwindling relevance to
political life in this country. Her political impotence has led to calls for reformation from certain factions, notably the Republican Movement
of Aoteaoroa New Zealand. It’s time for an elected head of state, they say – time for a Kiwi to wear the crown of our country. But, however
small their influence over law making may be, the royals continue to feature large in our national media.
H
ill and Kate were married after
that
‘fairytale’
engagement
the whole world watched,
and the noble Prince visited
Christchurch in March last year, too. Prince
Charlie turned heads playing DJ and weatherman for the BBC recently – a disarmingly
desperate bid for relevance during his employ
as king-in-waiting. His mum, our Queen,
Lizzy, got older, turning 86 in April, and is
celebrating 65 years on the throne. Surely
you didn’t miss her cameo at the London
Olympics – parachuting from a plane with
agent 007. Priceless! And, as a tribute to dear
Betty, John Key put her husband, Philip, on
New Zealand’s highest honours list and has
invited Chuck to a lunch in New Zealand, on
us – the taxpayer, too.
Like, love or loathe them, the royals are
first-name-basis familiar faces in most New
Zealand homes and their celebrity is as A-list
as anyone’s. Of course, the British monarchy
is woven into the fabric of our society, at
the apex of which sits Queen Elizabeth II
as head of state. But, it is rarely the monarchy’s role in our social structure that makes
the national news, perpetuating the royals’
relevance. Discussions about our constitutional framework are far less common
than paparazzi pics of Pipa in a new frock
– and she’s not even really one of them. It
is primarily with fame, rather than power,
that the royals retain their relevance to New
Zealand society.
Lack of political relevance is one of the reasons
republicanism is growing in this country.
As the historical, hierarchical power structures of monarchy erode under the modern
pressures of democracy, the royals’ perceived
right to rule is weakening. For the Republican
Movement of Aoteroa New Zealand – and
their more than 4,000 Facebook followers
– the problem with the monarchy is closely
related to our independence and identity as
20
Illustration by Neerachar Sophol
a nation, as they express on their website,
www.republic.org.nz:
“The
Republican
Movement wants a New Zealand republic to
replace the monarchy in New Zealand with a
democratically elected New Zealander as our
head of state, to truly represent our unique
culture and our place in the world as an
independent nation.” Republicans know the
modern British monarchy has little-to-no
actual political power within the Commonwealth of Nations over which they formally
reign. Let’s take a moment to consider our
country’s history, paying close attention to
our constitutional development. The story
can be told quickly, and has a common theme.
+
AS WE ALL OUGHT TO KNOW, MAORI WERE
here for some time before England arrived,
living off the land with their own cultural
sense of sovereignty and ownership. But,
jumping on ahead, by 1840 Britain had
signed the Treaty of Waitangi with support
from a majority of Maori, and so the Crown
claimed New Zealand as another South
Pacific jewel. After a little while, 1852, Kiwis
set up a Parliament, doing things pretty much
the way Britain did.
Soon though, nuances of life on the long
white cloud called for a form of government
that suited us specifically, and so the first four
Maori seats were introduced to the Parliament
in 1867. By 1893 the work of some good New
Zealanders was finally recognised as women
proved, and won their right to vote. Kiwis
pioneered this political evolution, which took
off around the Western world, signaling the
willingness of our people to independently
reform politics when necessary. By 1907 New
Zealand ceased being a colony, becoming
a dominion. The Evening Post reported on
the 26 of September that New Zealand “went
‘up one’ in the ‘school of British nations’.
Abroad … there is a notion that New Zealand
is … merely the little tail of the great dog; but
the Prime Minister is determined that the tail
is not to be overlooked, nor to be despised in
any way.” We may have moved up one, but
Aotearoa was still a small player.
Until 1947 Britain retained the right to
make laws for New Zealand, which was
only abrogated by acceptance of the Statute
of Westminster – legislation that had
existed, offering us independence, for 16
years. New Zealand was, like a nervous
adolescent, reluctant to move out of home
into the real world. But move we did, slowly
and consciously, away from the paternal
guidance of our British forebears. By 2004
we had abolished the right to appeal to the
Privy Council in London, and established our
own Supreme Court in our own capital city.
That was the last look back. It’s now 2012 and
what’s left of royal power in New Zealand is
only ceremonial.
New Zealand is a constitutional monarchy,
a member of the British Commonwealth
as a result of history. But modern MMP
democracy vests real political power with an
elected Prime Minister and political party,
with which they execute the functions of
State. The common theme of New Zealand’s
history is of liberalisation and moves toward
political independence. We were slow to
accept our own identity, and it took some time
to fully shake the vestiges of a colonial past.
But ultimately our history is a story of the
people taking power. Current parliamentary
process for the passing of laws requires the
Governor-General to assent, on behalf of the
Queen, to any legislation the Prime Minister
presents him or her with. The Queen’s power
to reject laws or dispel Parliament legally
exists within our unwritten constitution,
but in modern practice that power is merely
formal – the monarch’s representatives are
required to acquiesce our independence,
21
FEATURE
to assent our laws. Political ties with the
monarchy remain, but they are customary
and historical by nature, and are not integral
to New Zealand’s constitutional identity
should we chose to cut them.
The chairman of the Republican Movement
of Aotearoa New Zealand, Lewis Holden, is
a young, regular, Kiwi bloke working in the
computer software industry.
He says he became interested in the republican movement at university in Wellington
after realising how little sense it made to
maintain past connections with Britain when
New Zealand’s real goal ought to be moving
forward as an independent nation.
These days he runs the organisation,
attending functions to represent republicanism, writing blogs, and regularly lobbying
Parliament in an effort to inspire reform.
He describes his aspirations for New Zealand
with an earthquake metaphor: “When
studying buildings to assess their vulnerability in an earthquake we make note of
weak points before the ground starts shaking.
We want to fix things now, before they
fall down broken.” The same is true of our
political constitution, he says. Why wait until
something breaks?
Mike Wilkinson, the treasurer of the
movement, agrees that we need to be
proactive in reforming the constitution, and
not wait around for a problem to arise before
changing things.
“It’s about democracy, independence and
national identity,” he says. “I think New
Zealand is awesome, and I want to keep
it that way. That’s why we need to keep
assessing what it is that makes us awesome
and protect that.”
22
For these two men, New Zealand’s
awesomeness stems from the Kiwi spirit
of independence, that resilient No 8-wire
approach of our people to the practical
problems of life. Both hope to see political
reform in this country achieved via the
instrument of referendum, which would
ask Kiwis to consider abolishing legal links
with the monarchy and establishing an
independent office for the New Zealand head
of state. They say this will bolster democracy,
clarify national identify, and empower our
independent autonomy. They want forwardthinking change.
+
MONARCHY NEW ZEALAND REPRESENTS THE
other side of the story. They are the organisation dedicated to celebrating and further
entrenching the monarchy within the public
psyche. They want things to stay the same.
Their website, www.monarchy.org.nz, lists
many reasons why Lewis Holden and Mike
Wilkinson and the republicans are wrong,
though they evidently don’t believe in
evidence. Constitutional monarchies are the
most stable forms of government, they say.
Hereditary succession is the fairest form
of power transfer, they say. The Queen is
entirely a-political they say, dedicated purely
to her position of ceremonial leadership.
Whatever validity these and other arguments
may have if proven, Monarchy New Zealand
is not willing to engage in debate with
republicans.
‘This is their chairperson Sean Palmer’s
response to questions about republicanism
in New Zealand: “To engage in a debate with
those who would throw away [constitutional
monarchy] implies that the two ideas have
equal merit.”
He was given the chance to discuss his
position but chose to deflect the opportunity
with a bold, but hollow email: “Empirical
evidence around the world over the past
several decades has demonstrated clearly that
constitutional monarchy is a very important
part of a successful democracy. To suggest
that it isn't, could have very dangerous
constitutional ramifications which we would
not want to inadvertently encourage.”
Though the monarchists fear New Zealand
is not ready, too immature, for republican
independence, childishly they will not
entertain discussion of republicanism for
fear of the ramifications. Perhaps they are
right to fear the inevitable tide of change, for
the only certainty in politics is that what is
now will not remain.
There are two sides to this debate, one calling
for change, and the other continuity. Which
will prevail, and when?
This year New Zealand is undergoing constitutional review, though republicanism has
explicitly been left off the agenda. It seems
that the royals’ pageantry and pomp of late
has Kiwis fond of, and reluctant to talk of
cession from, the British.
Lewis Holden’s recent blogging suggests
that republicans might be preparing to bide
their time, relaxing on lobbying for a while,
waiting for the wave of populist royal support
to wash away.
My theory is this: New Zealand will become
an independent republic, severing all but
our historical ties with the Crown, and elect
a national as head of state. But it will not
happen soon. Our country has a history of
independent evolution, but such tends to be
pragmatic not proactive. Despite the lobbying
of groups like Republic New Zealand, there
is a heavy inertia accompanying political
change in New Zealand which is usually slow
to manifest.
Truth is, things work pretty well here in
God’s Own, and no one really feels oppressed
by regal tyranny. But as time marches on,
and the past stretches long behind us, Kiwis
will eventually look forward to a new political
arrangement which recognises and represents our independence within the world
of nations. This will not happen until the
currently comfortable status quo shifts to the
point where opinion is so unbalanced against
the reigning monarch that a referendum
might make change. Queen Bitts won’t get
the boot from Kiwis, but less-loved Chucky
might. We like Wills, and Kate is great, but by
the time they play King and Queen the baby
boomers will be passing power to generation
You and Me, and we are much more likely to
try change for change’s sake. Time will tell.
39
FEATURE
WHY SO FERAL? BLOOD ON PALMY STREETS
Nicole Canning examines the issues behind the student
drinking scene in Palmerston North and how to stay safe on a night out.
• Walking through the Square induces beatings, rape, or otherwise.
• Going into Malbas is like asking to be stabbed.
• Wandering eyes in Beer Barrel can lead to flying fists.
• Bar-hopping down Main St is like asking to be picked up by the paddy wagon.
u
hese statements, humorously and
casually passed down through
generations
of
students
in
Palmerston North, may seem like
nothing more than harmless jokes, yet in the
misty hours between 12 and 3am Thursday
through Saturday, their reality sinks in.
Recently, a situation got so out of hand that it
led to a young man being stabbed at Malbas
Bar and Nightclub.
As serious events such as these unfold, and
the word spreads, students begin to question
the safety of going out. But how much merit
do these words actually hold? And what’s
causing this type of behaviour in the first
place?
In the later hours of the evening, things get
warmed up. Girls swarm around mirrors,
applying make-up, straightening their hair,
and sourcing their sexiest dress. While back
in the lounge, guys joke around with a box
of beer and plenty more where that came
from. The music is pumping and everyone is
gearing up for a big night out. There’s a live
DJ at Malbas, and Beer Barrel is set to go off.
Everyone drinks to the point of peaking as
they wait for the only socially acceptable time
to head into town: midnight.
24
It is in these hours that the cultures of
pre-loading and binge drinking play their role.
Loved by students, and despised by the
community, these cultures cop a lot of flak.
Admittedly though, they are the initial cause
behind a lot of things, violent behaviour being
one. Although there is no direct connection
between alcohol and aggression, the effects
that alcohol has on the brain, including
increased sensitivity and reduced anxiety,
can heighten the chances of someone starting
a fight. So, the more alcohol consumed, the
more widespread its effects.
Amid all the hype of those initial hours, any
student who stumbles out their front door,
down the driveway, and on to the street will
find Massey University Community Police
Constable Chris Day patrolling studentfavoured areas, including the Halls of
Residence, Morris St, Ada St, and McGiffert St.
Contrary to what many believe, he’s not there
scoping out which party to shut down first.
“We are not here to break up the fun,” he
says. “We just want to keep everyone safe.”
His main goal is to keep an eye out and
prevent things from getting out of hand.
Chris Day has seen enough trashed houses
and burning couches in his 12 years in
the Police to build a tolerance for student
shenanigans. All he asks in return is that
when students have a good time they don’t
be idiots about it. He aims to keep on par
with the students and teach them about host
responsibility and keeping things controlled.
Since the initiation of Operation Combi this
aim has seen new light.
Operation Combi is organised by Palmerston
North City Council, Massey University,
Neighbourhood Support, MUSA, ACC, and
the Fire Service and the Police. It began as
free furniture pick-up for students wanting to
get rid of old furniture at the end of semester
and grew into an operation aimed at building
the relationship between students and
community organisations, such as the Police.
The aim is to teach students, especially those
living in the main student areas, about host
responsibility and violence prevention, to
tear down the barriers between Police and
students, and to take away the stereotypes
associated with both sides. At the beginning
of the year, Palmerston North Police held a
BBQ in Ada St and invited the students to
meet their staff. This was a huge success.
Palmerston North is the only place in New
Zealand with a system like Operation Combi,
and it seems to be working. Since it started
last year, the number of callouts for violence,
excessive noise, and student behaviour has
drastically reduced.
When midnight finally rears its head and
the students roll out to the first club of the
night, things are initially quiet. No one is
quite ballsy enough to dance just yet and
the crowds are rather maintained. People
wander around the club finding their mates
and getting a feel for what the night has in
store. The bar is fairly steady and the effects
of the alcohol consumed before town begins
to sink in as students slink into the free-ofinhibitions mood they know so well.
As the crowds pour through the doors and
the bouncers start making people queue-up,
things get a little more heated. Suddenly,
behaviour and social cues are misread, and
what might have been an innocent glance is
taken to be an evil glare served up with the
response, “What the fuck are you staring at?”
Professor
McMurran
of
Nottingham
University says alcohol “…narrows our focus
of attention and gives us tunnel vision. This
means that if someone provokes us while
we are drunk, we’re very sensitive to that
threat.” More often than not the provocation
is nothing more than a simple mistake.
Further into the night, and everyone is getting
agitated as more effects become apparent.
The risk of losing a temper and becoming
confrontational is higher. In the meantime,
anxiety levels are lower, leading people to
take risks. Actions that may be normally
shrugged off, such as a spilled drink down
a dress, or clown feet trodden on open toes,
become problems, compounded by the raging
dubstep drowning out any attempt at apology.
It is in these circumstances that the drinking
environment can cause aggressive behaviour.
There is only so much drunken pushing
and shoving to and from the bar before
someone takes matters into their own hands.
On a routine night, about five or six fights
break out in a club like Beer Barrel, and at
least 20 people are thrown out. And it is
often the bouncers who bear the brunt of
violent behaviour as they turn away disappointed drunks. After a night of drama and
dealing with people who don’t know when
enough is enough, it comes as no surprise
that the bouncers themselves are known for
losing their temper and physically throwing
drunken people out of their club and on to
the street.
And this is often when students out to simply
have a good time innocently wind up in the
middle of it.
+
MASSIVE SPOKE TO SOME SECOND-YEAR
students about some of their experiences with
violence and here are some of their stories:
“I was once walking from the office to the
taxi stand on Main St. A guy came up behind
me and put his hand between my legs. I said,
‘Who the fuck do you think you are?’ He
took me by the throat and said, “Your worst
nightmare.”
“I saw a fight break out at Malbas. A guy got
knocked out and hit his head three times on
his way to the floor. No one did anything
about it.”
“My mate once said hi to a guy she knew.
His girlfriend didn’t like it, so she beat her
up. She threw her on the ground and started
punching and kicking her. My mate ended up
with five stitches and half an eyebrow.”
But although these stories may suggest
otherwise, it would appear the issue of
student violence in Palmerston North is not
as bad as many may think.
Alcohol does not discriminate, and its effects
can occur to anyone, anywhere. Otago
University, for example, is consistently
dealing with drunken student riots and hefty
fist fights.
Chris Day says Palmerston North students
are more likely to do stupid things than to
throw their weight around. He says he once
came across a student multiple times in one
night trying to steal road cones and street
signs. When asked why he kept trying to get
away with it, the student said, “I’m a student.
I’m supposed to do stupid things.”
Often, those who cause issues are from
smaller towns such as Wanganui and Dannevirke who are in the big smoke for a night out.
The large military presence in Palmerston
North also plays its part.
Although the Square is still not the safest
place, since it was redesigned it has become
the main foot traffic thoroughfare between
Malbas and Beer Barrel, and the only sex that
takes place there is of a somewhat consensual
nature. It is also heavily monitored by
community security.
The main student clubs, despite what
most people believe, are also not the most
problematic areas. Main St, the home of clubs
such as Highflyers, Shooters, The Office, and
The Cobb, is where the majority of violencerelated issues are.
As with any issue, no select group of people
or area of town can be singled out.
Chris Day says it is a responsibility that
everyone has to take on. He says people need
to stay alert and recognise when things go
wrong. “Look after your mates, remove them
from bad situations, or ask for help from
bouncers and bar staff.”
He recommends basic safety like staying in
pairs, telling people where you are going, and
keeping a cellphone on you. At the end of the
day, don’t get so legless that you can’t look
after yourself.
25
FEATURE
FLATTING: A HORROR STORY
Our houses are shit, we are cold, what’s new? When your house is making
you sick, you wonder about the endurance required to survive student
flatting. Annabel Hawkins looks at New Zealand housing standards.
n
ew Zealand’s housing standards are
some of the worst in the world. So
much so, that the worst houses are
making us sick.
The problem is widespread, affecting the
three biggest factors in our society: it’s
impairing us socially, economically, and
environmentally. It turns out that for almost
centuries, countries have been tailoring their
buildings to suit their surroundings.
As winter bites into August, the natural
hibernation indoors ensues. But when the
cold is inescapable, when mould creeps into
your clothes and under your sheets, and lines
the shower walls and the windowsills, and the
curtains and even the ceilings, the level of such
endurance must be tackled: just how much
of this should students have to put up with?
Recent research by the Business Council
for Sustainable Development (NZBCSD)
suggests that more than one million homes
are not properly insulated. Insulation means
that warm air generated in your house stays
inside instead of escaping through the floor,
the roof, and the windows. It means that when
you make the call to turn your heater on, it’s
actually going to be mildly energy efficient.
Those one million homes contribute to the
more than 50 cases of respiratory illness
accepted by our hospitals every day, and are
responsible for New Zealand having one of
the highest rates of asthma in the world. And
26
while all that’s going on, those one million
houses are generating enough wasted water
to fill 9,200 Olympic-size swimming pools.
Stories of mould-ridden clothes, lampshades,
and disintegrating bed sheets and mattresses
are blown off as the status quo for students.
But the issue is beyond the banter over beers
about whose flat is the coldest or who lost
their flat bet about who would pike out and
turn on the heat pump first (loser buys a keg).
Architecture professor Robert Vales (Victoria
University) told the Sunday Star-Times
recently that the average house is “scarily
cold, badly insulated, has huge expanses of
single-glazed glass, and a nightmare to heat.
In terms of energy efficient homes we are not
very far along. It’s pretty much where the
Scandinavians were in the 1960’s”.
Our homes suffer from something called ‘Sick
Building Syndrome’ which is characterised
primarily by flaws in heating and ventilation.
Back in the day, before Mark Ellis endorsed
HRV systems and Stephen Fleming was the
face of Fujitsu, building standards such as
insulation, sealing windows properly, and
using efficient building materials were of less
salience. And we are now reaping the rewards
of the post-colonisation building frenzy
when timber was ‘in’, and wearing multiple
woollen jerseys was the norm. And that’s not
an exaggeration. All houses need in this day
and age to constitute being ‘liveable’ is a stove
and a plug in the wall. This makes insulation
seem like a tall order.
Landlords are bound by the Residential
Tenancies Act (RTA) 1986, and the Housing
Improvement Regulations under the Health
Act which states that “the landlord shall
… comply with all requirements in respect
of buildings, health, and safety under
any enactment so far as they apply to the
premises.” Tenants have rights to live in a
house that is not sub-standard to the extent it
is impacting on their general wellbeing.
In cities with the regular influx and exodus
of students around the university calendar,
students are vulnerable to signing up to
whatever they can find, come semester 1.
Often when leases are signed it’s February
and sun is still (relatively) ample and “great
indoor-outdoor flow” is a euphemism for
“the inside of this flat will be colder than
the air outside, but it’s OK ‘cos you’ve all got
laptops you can use for knee heaters.” Pile
on those merinos Mum bought you from the
Kathmandu sale and “she’ll be right”.
Following a month on the flat hunt, Canadian
exchange student Michael described his
shock at the state of Wellington flats: “In
Canada, sure, it’s snowing outside, but you’re
walking around your house in your boxer
shorts.” An unfathomable sight for sore eyes
for many Kiwis, according to recent statistics.
In 2008 the Green Party achieved its Warm
Up New Zealand: Heat Smart initiative – a
bid to subsidise the installation of insulation
into sub-standard housing. As it stands,
houses built before 2000 are eligible for
funding ($1,300 or 33%) towards the cost
of ceiling and under-floor insulation and
its installation. Tenants with Community
Services Cards (which any student with a loan
is eligible for) are able to get a 60% discount
for their landlord.
The initiative has wrapped up close to
200,000 homes, reportedly saving close to $1
billion and 16 lives in the process. Yet, Green
MP Holly Walker says those making the most
of the subsidy are predominantly owneroccupiers, with many tenants and landlords
unaware of the extent of the initiatives cost
and wellbeing benefits.
+
THOSE FACING THEIR SECOND (OR MORE)
consecutive year in student squalor may
become a bit more conditioned to lower
standards of health. But, as Walker says, the
issue permeates the entire country: “There is
a huge demographic outside of the student
demographic that are suffering pretty badly
with our poor quality housing.”
You may have also noticed the governmentinitiated ‘Energy Spot’ adverts featuring that
guy in the puffer vest advising us which car to
buy or how to run our dishwasher. As useful
as they are, unfortunately a lot of the tips
tend to not apply to the income bracket of
most of those affected by housing decay. The
vulnerability of tenants to such inadequate/
inexistent housing standards can leave them
in compromised living situations.
Sophie, 21, is bound to a 12-month lease even
after one room in her flat is being blamed for
some tenants having uncontrollable asthma
attacks, and another bronchitis. A doctor said
they should move out as soon as possible, a
seemingly impossible move when $600 of
bond is concerned. It is difficult to navigate
your rights as a meagre, vulnerable tenant to
the monopoly of property owners. Get out of
jail free card, anyone?
The Department of Business, Innovation and
Employment (the newly merged Housing
NZ) was unable to comment before publication deadline on the issues raised, except to
say their responsibilities lay in implementing
government policy and reviewing legislation.
There is great frustration among tenants
who feel their landlords are negligent, disinterested, or who are overseas. On the Warm
Healthy Rentals Facebook campaign, tenant
complaints regarding poor communication
with landlords abound. But a statement by
one participant tends to ring true: “Until
there is more security in the rental sector,
most tenants prefer to put up with what they
can get for the price, or move on. The tenant
will always pay the price for challenging an
unwilling landlord, I suspect.”
So do we need to just don on Swanny, fill
a hottie, and harden up? Walker tends to
disagree. “It’s a bit of a cultural thing. We feel
like it’s a rite of passage to live in a cold, damp,
shitty house. Especially students. People tell
these stories to show how hearty they are. It’s
really not a healthy state of affairs.”
It seems the obvious solution is to avoid a
grimy flat altogether. After all, the “woe is
me poor student” spin gets a bit old. Unfortunately, there is a reality to relatively strict
rent parameters and locations for students, as
well as a general fear of becoming homeless.
Yet, amid the haze of dragon breath and dewy
condensation, students have the ability to
exercise their power.
Students make up a substantial portion of
the rental market. No, they aren’t asking too
much when they say they want reasonable
standards for their houses, and yes, they have
the right to be uncompromising about this.
Landlords and tenants depend on each
other: landlords need the rent just as much
as students need somewhere to live. If
students do not rent the grimy three-comefive-bedroom-flat-with-minimal-naturallight-and-no-insulation-or-ventilation then
landlords can’t pay their mortgage, let alone
do all the other things wealthy property
owners do – like go on holiday so they don’t
have to answer their emails. It’s really simple
supply and demand.
Mould and general decay is not “wear and
tear”, a dehumidifier is a chattel, and you are
well within your rights to ask for one if you
think it’s raining outside when it’s actually
just the condensation on your windows.
Students are the market and have the power
to drive this change in standards, and it’s
about time ‘we’ did.
Flatting horror stories are not in short supply
in New Zealand. Apparently in the United
States, ‘student housing’ simply refers to
densely populated student areas, as opposed
to an unhealthy level of ‘shabby chic.’
The moral of the story? It’s like dating. Have
standards. Be uncompromising to these.
Talk to your landlord if you feel these are not
being met. Convince him or her to insulate
the skeleton of your flat, and get some meat
on those bones. In the meantime, word on
the street is that bubble wrap does the trick
pretty well too.
27
FEATURE
DISABILITY IN DISASTER – WITH A SMILE
Blake Leitch talks to a manager in emergency response
about helping those who it’s easy to miss in times of crisis.
I
n February 2011, an earthquake struck
Christchurch City and hundreds of
thousands of people had their lives
upturned. One month later, Japan was
hit by an earthquake, a tsunami, and nuclear
radiation incidents. Millions of people had
their lives changed forever. In 2010, Haiti
suffered from a major earthquake. In 2004,
more than 200,000 people died as a result
of the Boxing Day Tsunami. In mid-2011,
the United Nations declared a famine in East
Africa for the first time in nearly 30 years – a
famine that continues to this day.
Disasters have affected humanity throughout
history, but with recent developments in
disability awareness and inclusion, who is it
that makes sure that those who can’t care for
themselves are taken care of?
Valerie Scherrer is the Senior Manager for the
Emergency Response Unit (ERU) at CBM;
an international development and disability
organisation. CBM works in more than
70 countries with more than 700 partners
around the world. CBM works on making
disability inclusiveness not just an idea, but
a reality.
After Scherrer spoke at a disability inclusiveness symposium in Christchurch, I sat
down with her to understand more fully her
28
job, her views, and her life. Scherrer, who
lives in Brussels, Belgium, began working in
the development field in 1997, working in a
refugee camp and managing orthopaedic
workshops for people affected by landmine
explosions. She saw people disabled by the
world around them and wanted to help. One
of the things she realised was that efforts
for attitude change can be magnified during
times of emergency. With more resources
and higher community awareness there is a
better chance of attitude change for disability
inclusiveness. If disability issues can be
included in emergency response then there
is potential for a positive long-term impact.
Scherrer says her role requires her to look
after all disaster/conflict area emergencies
around the world. With a team of just four
people, ERU provides support to partner
organisations in response to emergencies,
making sure people with disabilities are being
taken into account. This is done through
making sure relief activities are accessible
while specific needs and services are fulfilled.
Able-bodied people are not excluded, but
ERU simply ensures that the disabled
community is catered for in time of need.
The role of Senior Manager is two-fold: on
one hand, it requires getting awareness in
mainstream relief so people with disabilities
are not only considered, but understood.
When clean water is provided, you can’t put
the tank at the end of a road which is full of
rubble – a person in a wheelchair won’t be
able to reach it and a person with a visual
impairment will have difficulty in accessing
it. So it’s about making the environment as
accessible as possible in every way possible.
On the other hand, a personal level must
also be focused on. If a disabled person loses
a device which aids in their overcoming an
otherwise inaccessible environment (wheelchair, hearing aid, crutches, cane, etc.), these
need to be replaced or substituted as soon
as possible. If a disabled person loses part
of their support network (family, friends,
carers, etc.), then this support network needs
to be found or rebuilt. So it’s not just about
making the environment accessible, it’s also
about rebuilding those accommodations
which make a disabled person independent.
Scherrer says she does not see that making
disability access and inclusiveness a reality
is an extra effort, despite the level of work
involved. She feels that people with disabilities have the same basic needs as everybody
else to survive after a disaster. The only thing
that prevents disabled people from receiving
these basic needs is that in disasters they are
often “invisible”. In developing and developed
countries alike, it is also often the case that
there are disabled people hidden within the
communities. So CBM and ERU strive to
make these disabled people visible by trying
to help disabled people organisations take an
active role in emergency response.
For Scherrer, disaster and emergency are an
opportunity for change, in both attitudes and
accessibility. If planned properly, emergency
response can be used to make a huge change
in a very short time. This is one of the reasons
she puts so much effort into her work – it’s
a good opportunity for change and evolution
towards better inclusion and consideration of
disability issues.
+
WHEN I ASK HOW YOUNG PEOPLE AND
young adults can help create an all-inclusive
society, Scherrer talks about how disasters
and emergencies create an environment of
solidarity and community; how everyone
wants to help. Young people are energetic
and committed to the cause of helping as
much as possible.
As young people are encouraged to build
better what has been destroyed, they can
bring newness with it; new ideas, new initiatives, new innovations. These are things that
get lost with age as people get into a routine,
where they simply want things to be the
way they were before. Young people look at
improving the condition of life of everyone in
a post-disaster situation.
She says that though she has spent only a little
time in New Zealand she feels there is at least
a minimally acceptable level of accessibility
for disabled people. However, she qualified
it only due to her lack of experience in New
Zealand as it relates to disability accessibility.
One of the things she feels could be focused
on to continue towards an all-inclusive
society is the inclusion of disabled in jobs. For
example, although she met many disabled
workers as representatives of the Ministry
of Health, Ministry of Education, she feels
they should not always have to work within
offices of disability issues. If disabled people
are hired to work only with disability issues,
that is not full inclusiveness. It needs to go a
step further – to include disabled people in
any and all types of work.
Scherrer says that during her many international travels she has discovered a
difference in the treatment of disabled
people, with the poorest countries seeming
to be best in regards to disability inclusion
in the community. One reason for this she
puts down to the community spirit, and
says that is something that seems to be lost
when countries and communities become
developed; our neighbours can mean nothing
to us anymore, compared to a developing
country where a neighbour is part of the
family.
The other reason is the difference in attitude
among disabled people. In developed
countries they are more inclined to ask
the government for aid, but in developing
countries there isn’t the government infrastructure, and so disabled people must be
more proactive on a personal level. So the
spirit of the people is different.
Taking all of the work and travel that Scherrer
undertakes into consideration, I ask her how
she is able to cope on a personal level. She
says she doesn’t feel it is any more difficult
than any other job. It’s just a matter of being
organised and knowing when and where she
has to be. In fact, for her it’s not difficult at
all, because she has a good network, a good
family, and good friends around her. They
know what she does, why she does it, and
they understand her choices.
What can be a bit hard is developing
long-term plans, and any that are made
usually have to be cancelled. So she is used to
living on a very short time frame. It requires
her social network to have a very good understanding, and it can be more difficult for her
friends and family to cope than for her.
Seeing the workings within CBM, I have had
first-hand experience of the friendship and
camaraderie in the organisation. With this
in mind, I ask Scherrer how CBM, acting like
a family, helps to make it an international
leader in the area of disability inclusiveness.
It turns out this equality is one of the reasons
she joined CBM in the first place.
As she sees it, this means sponsors are more
than money-lenders; they are partners to
grow with. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a
small local business or the WHO which is
involved - it’s the same level of partnership.
It’s a two-way relationship between CBM
and every partner, and this is one of CBM’s
greatest strengths. Everything is done on the
same equal basis.
29
FEATURE
which are fundamentally different due to a
few key errors in translation.
Both texts are clear that the Treaty was
to give the Crown the right to govern and
create a British settlement, and that Maori
were to have full rights as British subjects
in that settlement. The first differences in
translation are evident in the preamble: the
claims for misconducts that occurred before
1992), but aim to have dealt with all of these
matters within the next five years.
The Treaty of Waitangi (State Owned Enterprises) Act 1988 was created to instruct how
the Crown and Maori were to deal with the
transfer of land to state-owned enterprises,
and within this Act was the inclusion of
‘Many are opposed to the $1000 minimum spend for a share parcel, which is
vastly unaffordable for a lot of New Zealanders.’
Hayley Locke traces the asset sales debate and wonders if it’s worth spending so much time on
solving such a small part of the problem.
SNUBBING THE TREATY? ASSET SALES & TRIBUNALS
H
e could choose to ignore
whatever findings they might
have. I am not saying that we
would, but we could.”
Those were John Key’s resounding words
when asked on TV One’s Breakfast on July
9 about what the Government’s response
would be to the Waitangi Tribunal’s findings
on Maori’s rights to ownership of the water
used for hydro-generated electricity under
the Treaty of Waitangi. And quite suddenly
the Waitangi Tribunal shot to the forefront
of public consciousness and debate, arguably
for the first time since the Foreshore and
Seabed controversy in 2004.
John Key promised, as part of his election
campaign last year, that if he was to be
re-elected National would sell up to 49%
of the public’s stake in the Mighty River
Power, Meridian, Genesis, and Solid Power
energy companies, as well as 74% of Air New
Zealand, bringing in $6 billion to help pay off
the nation’s debt. Now that he’s clinched the
title of Prime Minister for the second time,
Mr Key is beginning to deliver on his promise.
This didn’t make him particularly popular
with a portion of voters for a myriad of
30
reasons. Many are opposed to the $1000
minimum spend for a share parcel, which
is vastly unaffordable for a lot of New
Zealanders.
He has said that while KiwiSaver, iwi, and the
Superannuation fund will be big investors,
he also expects that “mums and dads” will
take a slice of the pie. Presumably by that he
means those earning up around the top of
the pay-scale who coincidentally also have
children, rather than middle-class parents
like mine who, though they can provide for
themselves adequately, don’t have a spare
thousand bucks hidden between the couch
cushions.
But the Prime Minister’s words have angered
more than just those who will be financially
unable to participate in the investments.
Many Maori are furious at the idea that shares
in the electricity companies could be sold,
potentially to foreign investors, because they
believe that, under the Treaty of Waitangi,
Maori people have rights to fresh water. In
particular, the Poaukani iwi believe that a
number of the dams used for the Mighty
River Power company use water that flows
from a riverbed that they have legal right to.
Understandably the Waitangi Tribunal’s
ascension to prominence in the media can
lead to a few questions about its operations:
what is it for, what are its goals, and what is
its role in asset sales?
MASSIVE will explain the basics so that
the next time you’re with those superopinionated, hyper-political types (you know,
the ones who practically have Stuff news
intravenously injected into their veins to
keep themselves up to the minute on political
happenings, and who are jumping up and
down as they fervently discuss the Waitangi
Tribunal’s relationship to asset sales), you
can join the conversation rather than sheepishly checking Facebook on your phone
hoping no one asks you what you think.
The Waitangi Tribunal was established in
1975 by a corresponding Act of Parliament
in order for Maori to formally, and legally,
resolve any grievances when they felt the
Treaty of Waitangi had been breached.
Though that seems straightforward, it is
difficult to conclusively prove the exact terms
of the Treaty, given that it was written in
English then translated into Maori for Maori
to read and sign, but resulted in two versions
Illustration by Atarau Rikirangi
English version suggests the Treaty’s main
purpose was to establish a government,
protect Maori interests, and allow a British
settlement, whereas the Maori translation
places emphasis on retaining the right of
Maori chiefs (rangatiras) to have authority
over their own domains, as well as the
protection of Maori land ownership.
Controversy arises from Article 1 of the
Treaty because of the mis-translation of the
word sovereignty. The English text stated
that the Crown would have full sovereignty
of New Zealand, but at the time there was
no direct translation of this word into Maori.
Instead, the word kawanatanga was used.
The meaning of this word is actually closer
to meaning governance than sovereignty,
and gave the impression to the Maori that
their rangatiras would still have autonomy to
manage their own affairs, though they would
be regulated by the Queen.
Article 2 also contains room for misunderstanding, given that the English text gives
Maori “the full exclusive and undisturbed
possession of their Lands and Estates,
Forests, Fisheries and other properties”,
while the Maori text refers to this by using
the term tino rangitiratanga, meaning
highest chieftainship. It is feasible that the
Maori understood the terms in Article 2 to
further emphasis their right to the authority
of their domain, the right which appeared to
have been promised to them in Article 1.
The issue becomes even more complicated
when you consider that it is impossible to
determine whether these mistakes were done
by someone with a poor grasp of the Maori
language or whether it was done maliciously
to trick the Maori.
The Treaty was written on the instruction
of the British Crown, and William Hobson,
co-author of the Treaty, was specifically
told that all dealings with Maori were to
be conducted in good faith, and that the
Maori were not to be coerced into signing
any contracts which would injure them in
any way. Unfortunately, that is not what
has occurred. The Waitangi Tribunal is still
dealing with historical grievances (that is,
Subsection 9 of the State Owned Enterprises
Act 1986 which says the Crown cannot act in
a manner that is inconsistent with the Treaty.
The Treaty doesn’t have the power to enforce
any of its findings; it merely makes recommendations to the government of the day,
hence John Key’s comment about how
National could choose to ignore the findings.
Furthermore, State Owned Enterprises
Minister Tony Ryall said the Government
would be drafting new legislation, namely
the Mixed Ownership Model Bill, designed
specifically to exempt partial asset sales from
being within the ambit of the State Owned
Enterprises Act 1986.
+
JOHN KEY’S ACTIONS HAVE LED TO PUBLIC
outcry and extreme disdain from the likes
of Maori Party co-leaders Tariana Turia and
Pita Sharples, who threatened to withdraw
their confidence and supply agreement
with the National Party over the issue. “The
main issue was that this Government would
treat our people in the same way the Labour
Party did by legislating away their rights,”
Mrs Turia said over her concern about the
potential asset sales.
The Labour Party’s refusal to allow the
foreshore and seabed of the Marlborough
Sounds to be given to Maori was what caused
the Maori Party to switch allegiance from
Labour to National, meaning that the Maori
take notice, especially now that the Waitangi
Tribunal has made a decision that the
Government should halt proceedings: “We
therefore conclude that the Crown ought not
to commence the sale of shares in any of the
Mixed Ownership Model companies until we
have had the opportunity to complete our
report on stage one of this inquiry and the
Crown has had the opportunity to give this
report, and any recommendations it contains,
in-depth and considered examination.”
John Key responded to this announcement
on One News by saying the Government
would listen to the advice of the Waitangi
Tribunal recommendation before making
any decisions: “We owe it to the tribunal and
interested parties very much to consider that
in good faith and very carefully.”
Many Maori believe this is a step in the right
direction, with Mana Party leader Hone
Haraweira, who believes the Maori Party
should abandon their confidence and supply
agreement with National if asset sales come
to fruition, telling One News he “couldn’t be
happier” about the tribunal’s decision: “The
question now is whether the Government
will listen to the tribunal and halt the sale of
state assets or whether they spit in the face of
the tribunal like the Prime Minister said they
would.”
The future of asset sales is still tenuous.
The Government looks resolute in its determination to go through with them, but
opposition is fierce. The Government is
serious about proving they are cutting down
national debt, but at what cost? Asset sales
are expected to raise only $6 billion. Finance
Minister Bill English announced in his 2012
Budget speech that he expects the national
debt to reach $70 billion, meaning the money
brought in would be only comparative to a
drop in the ocean.
The Government needs much more than a
short-term fix to bring the country back into
surplus, and all this time wasted on solving
such a small part of the problem is highly
counterproductive.
In the short term, the outcome could have
colossal negative ramifications for National
‘Many Maori are furious at the idea that shares in the electricity companies
could be sold, potentially to foreign investors, because they believe that,
under the Treaty of Waitangi, Maori people have rights to fresh water.’
Party are being very steadfast in attempting
to disallow asset sales.
After so much backlash it seems the
Government has got the message of distaste
for asset sales loud and clear. The issue of
the Treaty of Waitangi has been something
the New Zealand media has been fixated on,
and that has forced the National Party to
in regards to both their relationship with the
Maori Party and the Maori community at
large if they go through with their plan.
Will the small cut it makes to public debt
be worth it? We can muse all we like on the
various outcomes, but in the end only time
will tell what the price of asset sales will be
for the New Zealand Government.
31
FEATURE
BMD –BECAUSE WALLS WON’T PAINT THEMSELVES
The mysterious group bmd have been painting murals around New Zealand’s streets
for years now. Despite this they are a hard group to track down. We left paint pots by
empty walls, shone a ‘bmd’ bat signal in the sky and eventually learned that they were in
Singapore. So we took the MASSIVE Magazine jet over there, held them against a wall and
demanded an interview… they were quite nice about it really.
MASSIVE: Your artwork has a very distinct
look to it. When I see one of your paintings
on all a wall I can instantly recognize it as
being bmd. How did you come to develop
such a distinct style?
BMD: If you want to meet a new breed of
assholes, get into graffiti. There’s more
drama than Shortland Street. Bmd learned
early that the only way to get anything done
in life is to flip yo negs to possies. Although we
didn’t know it at the time, all the hate we got
– from graffiti community, our parents, and
our girlfriends - really shaped our aesthetic,
our style and our ethic. You wanna do something twice as much if people tell you that
you shouldn’t. We loved simple things, but
we weren’t getting any respect for it. Drypnz
32
once said to us that anyone could do our
work. I was like thanks, asshole. But that’s the
kinda shit that made us go all out. We weren’t
getting many pats on the back from anyone,
so it made us tighten our operation, produce
more and produce larger scale works. We’re
also lucky that we have many brains working
toward one goal, so our developments always
been quicker than your average tagger. We
put in work evolving our style behind the
scenes, and spent a lot of time in the library
flicking through art and children’s books, and
watched heaps of cartoons. Without giving
too many fucks, bmd has always tried to be
unpretentious, fun and positive, and we try to
translate through what we paint.
M: Where does your interest in painting
walls stem from? Have you always been
interested in street art as a medium or did
you start off with paper and canvases and
then evolve to walls?
BMD: I hate the idea of some asshole artist
spending two years on a painting and then
some bigger asshole in a suit buying it and
letting it gather dust on a hallway wall. Art is
more than just something that breaks up the
trip to the toilet. We’ve very rarely stepped
away from painting in public spaces for the
very reason we believe people should experience art. We were raised in a small town
with little to do apart from get pregnant or
do up your Honda civic. And the art scene
consisted of pictures of the mountain and/
or beach. It wasn’t a stimulating place, and
us sneaking around stencilling felix the cat
faces on power boxes was our feeble attempt
at changing the mundane. You gota create
what you want to see. But this taught us the
power of team work; the ability to conjure up
something twice as fast with four hands, and
the peace of mind having four eyes looking
Questions by Cameron Cornelius & Olivia Jordan. Photo by Nigel Roberts
out. I’m not sure if you’ve ever done anything
illegal with your best friend, but it’s about the
most fun you can have. Before we’d paint, we
would see each other’s sketches and trip; it
was always a frenzy of ideas and we grew off
one another quickly. But the drawing time
was like a rainy day activity, we were more
often than not out of the house trying to trick
someone into letting us paint their wall.
M: I notice a lot of your work explores the
idea of anatomy specifically the dissection of
it. Is this just something you like to draw or
is there a deeper meaning behind it?
BMD: There’s always a girl involved somewhere with this kind of shit. Don’t want
to get all ‘emo’ on ya’ll but girls have been
our gift and our curse. Sometimes being
the supportive shower co-pilot carefully
cleaning the paint off our bodies, or sometimes being the nagging phone call half way
through a piece saying we forgot to make
the bed. Everyone has loved and lost, and
we’re no different. Painting has always been
coping mechanism to get back on track. The
anatomy experimentation started during a
dark time for us a few years back when we
were like “fuck all this happy lovey-dovey
street art shit” and just started killing our
characters. For this reason, it was quite ironic
for us to paint a girl chopped in half for your
last issues cover. Although the initial intentions were a bit negative, the outcome pushed
us in an uncharted direction, which has since
become a huge part of the bmd aesthetic.
None of our work makes any sense, so its
fun trying to give something so ridiculous
an anatomical explanation. Graphically and
spatially, anatomical artworks fit perfectly for
painting a public space – you can cover more
space for less by chopping it and spreading
it around.
M: There are numerous places around the
world that could be considered meccas for
street art, such as Berlin, East London or the
Bronx in New York. Does bmd have aspirations to paint in any of these places and if
you could paint a specific wall anywhere in
the world where would it be?
BMD: We’re trying to grow some wings and
move aboard, but we’re in no hurry. So far
we’ve done stuff around Asia, Canada and
the Pacific islands, but there’s still plenty
more walls.. Berlin is definitely the hub for it
all, and we’ll join the party there sometime.
South America has also always appealed to
us, but maybe that’s the idea of cheap coke
and big booty hoes. This kinda shit takes you
to some weird places and we’re trying to keep
as open as possible about everything.
M: Is there any rivalry between street
artists? Are there certain walls / areas for
particular artists or collectives, or is it all
fair game?
BMD: It’s a game of knives out there. When
something’s in the public arena you lose
control of it, it’s like a drunken jock at a party.
Some shits gonna go down that no one wants,
but you can’t stop the motherfucker. There
are rules, but no one gives a shit. Good luck
trying to get a bunch of criminals or artists
to agree on something. The good side is that
there’s always something new going up, but
33
FEATURE
the bad side is that works can be destroyed
easily. Most of our favourite walls by our
friends have been long painted over. It’s the
nature of the beast and you know how it is
when you sign up. It’s a small city and everyone’s out to get the same spaces, make their
mark and do their thing. Everyone’s trying
to stop you – the fuzz, the council, buffers,
vigilante old men, your girlfriends, advertising companies, bitch ass graffiti writers,
your mum even. Not going to get into an
economics lesson on ya’ll, but a bit of competition does everyone good; it advances things
quickly and pushes everyone to do crazy
things. Read a book.
M: The Tate Modern London, with its iconic
street art exhibition a couple of years ago,
did a lot to elevate the profile of street art in
Europe, where it is now protected, supported
and considered a valuable art medium.
Do you feel street art is as valued in New
Zealand? Could you imagine, for example,
the Auckland Art Gallery doing something
similar?
34
BMD: The times have changed from a “lock
them up and throw away the key” to a “oh
look that’s cute, it even has a little anus at
the back”! We live in a very conservative
climate in New Zealand, but it’s becoming
more credible with time. Mainly for the fact
that people can’t deny the work ethic and
quality of works that many of our artists are
doing, with or without society’s blessing.
Cut Collective had a show at the Auckland
Gallery a few years back, and they painted the
outside of the building which was big news at
the time. Askew is a leader who’s branching
out to different institutions, and changing
the conventional perception of what it is to
be a graffiti artist. He’s like homeboys with
the mayor of Auckland; king of fingers in
all the pies. In Wellington we have the likes
of Editor and Drypnz who are pushing the
limits of what it is to be a visual artist and
doing unconceivable quality work, which
adds enormously to the credibility of the
culture as a whole. Even if they are weirdos.
M: I read recently that Barack Obama
praised Shepard Fairey work for ‘its ability
to encourage Americans to change the status
quo and achieve change’. With so many
street artists using the medium for political
and social change, does your work seek to
motivate a particular reaction?
BMD: Our leader certainly doesn’t care for
change, must be a black guy thing. Bmds
main intention is to add some fun to a space,
not force a message onto someone. We’re not
Brian Tamaki. Changing public space can be
a very powerful tool for change, but you’ve
got to trek carefully with your messages.
Maybe one day we’ll do like a “eat your vegetables” mural or something. We ain’t Mother
Teresa either, and we’re not trying to change
the world, but if there were a reaction we’re
after, it would be to encourage people to do
something positive with their lives. Shit, even
if you hate us, don’t be bitter – be better.
M: Has the success of street artists such as
Banksy, Shepard Fairey, JR and Blu had a
detrimental effect on street art at all? Are
there artists out there skipping straight to
Photos by Blake Dunlop (above, bottom right, bottom second from right): www.blakedunlop.co.nz & Damin Radford (top right)
licensed works without any concept of the
original ethos or experience on the streets?
BMD: Love or loathe these artists, they have
put graffiti on the map. They’re the people
who gave their lives to public arts, and have
set an unprecedented standard for other
artists. Even if you don’t value the artistic
content of their work, you can’t deny the
impact their work has had on society. Even
my nanna knows what a bankski is. The other
side of that is that people frequently take
their concepts, chew them up and spit them
out as their own. This happens all the time
in graffiti, but its pretty transparent when
it happens. There are leaders and there are
followers, and there was probably a time
when leaders were followers. Ideas all come
from somewhere, however there comes a
time when you got to walk in your own shoes.
But it happens in everything; I’m sure there
were a million people doing the moonwalk
after M.J. came out with it. Lets hope the
paedophilia thing doesn’t catch on too.
M: I can think of more than one brand that
has used street art to advertise themselves.
What’s your view on this?
BMD: While we don’t agree with it, it depends
on how you go about it. The cold hard reality
of the world is that you need to produce
something for someone to get a buck. Be as
real as you want, but you can’t eat paint or
pay your landlord with a painting. I’d much
rather see someone making rent from their
creative talents, than from making burgers
for $11.38 an hour. I personally think fuck
a day job. You only get one shot, so believe
that the most fulfilling way to make a living is
through your own ideas. But you got to draw
the line somewhere. The last thing we want is
big Glassons x CFG billboards.
M: Your recent cover art for MASSIVE, highlighted the capabilities of your work off the
wall. Can we expect to see your art explore
different scopes like this in the future? Or
can we expect you to follow other street
artists into the realms of clothing, commercial prints etc.?
BMD: We’re always down to paint a naked
girl. Ladies get in touch if you got the curves.
Send your pictures and $10 to bmdbmdbmd@
hotmail.com. Last months cover with Denelle
and Sloan was a great project for us and has
opened up a whole new kettle of fish. We’re
working on lots of new projects with some
other creatives that will all be off the wall but
highly interactive. We’ve been lucky to work
with the talented Blake Dunlop of Emulsionburns.com on a few photo and video projects,
and hoping to trick him into doing some
more in the in the coming months. So expect
some freaky, edgy, space age, contemporary,
new wave, exotic artworks from us soon.
M: What does the future hold for Bmd? Do
you have any specific goals in place? Are
there plans for taking over the world and
turn it into some kind of wall painted utopia?
BMD: We’re grown men spending our time
convincing property owners that their asset
will look absolutely fantastic with a three
story drawing of a skinned animal on the
side of it. We’re currently reviewing our life
choices.
35
FEATURE
Is street art an act of vandalism or an act of art? It really depends on your own perspective. Street art is a
powerful and growing artistic medium in today’s society with new pieces appearing on street walls every day.
Andrew McLeod tracked down street artist ‘Trollz’ who speaks out about street art.
THE TROLLZ THAT RUN OUR SOCIETY
Some 30 million years ago, when T-Rex’s approached domestication, Dodo’s flew free, and homosapiens were beginning their rule on the
animal kingdom, neanderthals gave birth to a concept that shaped the world as we know it – imagery.
i
t was Lucius the Hunter who, upon
defeating an elusive wildebeast, decided
to draw a life-size image using nearby
chalk, at the entrance to his humble
abode. Lucius's tribe were originally bewildered by the hunter’s installation, but before
long adjusted to the image and thereafter
referred to Lucius as the tribe’s best hunter.
The following 30 million years saw the
imagery develop from a stick wildebeest to
the finer arts that now grace our collections,
our galleries and our streets. The burning
questions in the minds of historians – was
this abstract depiction a selfish drawing or
did it have the intent of education?
In New Zealand we are blessed to have a
plethora of talented street artists – O.D,
BMD, Drypnz, Mr. G, the list goes on. But
if people from the future were to discover
the artwork that is created in our era, what
conclusions would they draw? In modern
society, corporate advertising is a large factor
in how our lives are shaped, considering they
use similar mediums, but does art have the
same power? Would street art as a forum for
freedom of speech help our society to be less
… fucked up? Does the increasing commercial
interest in street art start to render the art
meaningless?
In the beautiful city of Paris, fines for tagging
on public property can reach up to the equivalent of NZ$95,000. Nevertheless, in the
early 80’s, returning from a trip to America
and seeing the artistic tags that covered the
underground in New York, a young Parisian
native by the name of Xavier Prou (Blek Le
Rat) helped shape a culture that would later
spread around the world by running the risks
and projecting his characters around the city.
His satirical pieces, including ‘Television
Head’ which creatively exaggerated the
premise that those who watched too much
TV would evolve with square eyes, quickly
boosted his reputation as an artist, and before
long he had gained the title of Godfather of
the stencil. He would go on to be considered
one of the artists that helped the movement
get to where it is today. When questioned on
his motives behind his art, his response was
36
“I had a desire for recognition—that people
know who is Blek.”
To help me address some more of the street
art scene in New Zealand, I managed to track
down the anonymous Auckland artist Trollz,
whose artwork has started to spread across
the Super City, and he was willing to share
his views on what street art is.
“For me, street art is art created without
rules or guidelines,” he says. “I guess it’s
really anything created, usually non-commissioned, in a public space specifically outside
in the open.”
FOR THOSE POSSIBLY UNAWARE OF THE
artwork Trollz creates, his work can be
seen scattered around the city, distinct troll
characters displaying assertive messages to
our society.
“The idea for my Trollz initially came from my
willingness to explore some art that shared
the views I have on the current state of the
world. During my day job I create art of a very
different nature – it's fun and I totally love it,
but it doesn't allow me to really ‘say anything’
or share ideas of a conscious nature.”
Trollz clearly has an appreciation for artists
of any creed: musicians, painters, poets and
filmmakers, especially those who have the
ability to communicate social or political
ideas.
“I have always had a fascination with any
art that has a message, especially music and
street art. And since I can't play an instrument
in any way and love to draw, I thought it'd be
a cool way to finally share some of the stuff
that's been floating around my head for so
long.”
In the early years, the culture of street art
consisted of the ‘under-appreciated’ in our
society, where talented individuals took to
the streets to do what had previously been
done in the confines of their bedroom. No
one did it for recognition, or money; their
motives were purely to reach an audience,
be appreciated and gain cult status, albeit
through an anonym.
Then along came Banksy.
I hope Banksy needs no introduction. For
those unfamiliar with the name, take a
Google-refresher course, because at very
least you ought to recognise his work.
Here was an artist with the desire to take his
society-doubting messages to an international audience. His work in the Gaza strip,
the eye of international media, provided that
boost, and almost overnight Banksy translated his cult status into a household name.
The attention his work warranted would see
him in 2006 front an art gallery showing in
a Hollywood warehouse that boasted a starstudded guest list, complementary wine and
single prints starting at $500.
The exhibition, a first for the street art
movement, would later cop criticism from
the purists. It was defined by some to be
pretentious and commercialised, with
Banksy taking away the title of a “hypocritical
sell-out”. When later asked about Banksy,
Blek Le Rat lashed out, defining the integrity
of an artist by their desire “…to be seen. Not
be sold or to be recognized in a museum”.
Regardless of the critics, Banksy has an
amazing ability to create art that causes
people to question society and educate the
generations on a new perspective. In rebuttal
of Blek’s definition, Banksy is an artist who
37
FEATURE
Legends of street art: ‘Above’ (far left), Blek le Rat (second to left) & Banksy (right hand page)
managed to capture the entire world as an
audience, and if that is achievable as well as
making some money is the meaning of his art
really lost?
The irony and pinnacle of Banksy’s so-called
commercialisation was encapsulated in one
of his pieces that features a pompous art
auction where the piece for sale reads ‘I can’t
believe you morons buy this shit’.
“I think anybody who labels somebody else,
especially an artist, a sell-out is doing it purely
out of jealousy,” Trollz adds. “I personally
really dig his stuff and his approach to art,
and there are no rules when it comes to
getting an idea out there or commenting
on the hypocrisy in the world. Artists are
supposed to evolve and change. What's the
point in remaining stale? You’ll just become
irrelevant!”
As for selling his artwork in galleries, Trollz
defends Banksy’s ability to sell his art, saying
everybody has to eat and put a roof over
their head. The fact that some pieces sell for
millions of dollars is probably affirmation
of how fickle the art world is and hardly the
fault of the artist that he is apparently paid
too much.
“If some pompous rich idiot wants to spend
that much money on some art because
somebody told them it's good, that’s hilarious
and probably something Banksy laughs his
arse off at! If somebody is good with cars or
has a passion for engines, they should be a
mechanic. People who are good at packing
bags should work at a supermarket. People
38
who can draw and be creative should also be
able to make money off their talents!”
Art in a gallery is one thing, but street art
is usually painted on canvas supplied by
the unsuspecting public. Buildings, screen
doors, stop signs, and even railway cars are
all accessible under the light of the night.
For many members of public it is easy for
the message within the art to be lost, and the
piece described as selfish vandalism. So what
do artists like Trollz feel when people label
their work so simply?
+
“WELL, EVERYBODY IS ENTITLED TO THEIR
opinion, that's the point of art, really. You
can't help people taking art at face value but
it's a shame because, for the most part, those
are the sort of people I'm aiming my stuff
at. By its public nature, street art is, in my
opinion, open to opinion more than other art
forms. You're not putting paintings up on a
wall in an exclusive gallery for your friends
and rich people to come check out – it's there
for anybody and everybody to judge.
I think that's what's fun about it, too,
especially stuff that's ‘saying something’
– getting ideas out to as many people as
possible. But at the end of the day I don't care
what people think ... they can love it or hate
it ... if they're talking about it at all then I'm
happy!”
Following the progression of street art to
mainstream channels, corporations started
to see it as an opportunity as a fresh medium
for advertising.
Recently, the New Zealand Police commissioned Otis Frizzell, a well-accredited New
Zealand street artist, to create stencilled
pieces featuring Police officers in action. The
irony of the work stirred up mixed emotions,
some loved the work, most thought it irrelevant, some condemned the fact that the
artist had agreed to help street art be used as
advertising.
“Obviously, advertising at its core serves a
purpose,” says Trollz. “A business, whatever,
its size, needs to make people aware of its
products in order to be a business, [and] to
do this some of them need to employ artists/
creative people to help come up with a good
way to do such a thing. Where things become
a little immoral in my mind is when some
companies/advertisers
exploit
people’s
insecurities to sell products. Also when big
companies/corporations use advertising
to distort how they actually are ... banks
pretend to be your mate in their TV ads but
in reality all they want is you in a lifetime of
debt … BP says they are trying to be green/
eco and getting away with murder in the Gulf
Of Mexico.”
With the international boom of street art
as an advertising medium came stories of
ruthless artists hijacking the artwork to
backfire on the corporation commissioning
the piece, and probably the most prolific
would be Above’s piece in South Africa.
Around the same time as Banksy, Above was
another audacious and extremely talented
street artist, a young California local, who
was also starting to make his mark in the
street art movement. His artwork gained a
reputation for strongly displaying his opinion
and refusing to compromise his morals and
meaning of his art for financial gain. In early
2012 one piece in particular seems illustrate
this perfectly.
Following a year of being commissioned
to create artwork for corporations seeking
a fresh advertising medium, Above was
approached by a collective of diamond
traders in Johannesburg named Jewel City,
who were responsible for exporting the
majority of rough diamonds mined in South
Africa. An agreement was reached to decorate
a previously humdrum wall with the phrase
‘Diamonds are a woman’s best friend’. As the
piece came close to completion, the owners of
Jewel City approved of Above’s artwork, then
headed home for the night just as Above was
getting started.
The next morning, Jewel City employees
arrived to see the final product. He had
completed the piece but, intent on addressing
the societal flaws ingrained in the diamond
industry, had made slight additions. The
mural now read ‘Diamonds are a woman’s
best friend, and man’s worst enemy’. Above
had disappeared, his job complete. This piece
highlighted his refusal to forfeit his values.
Instead, his reward came from the inherent
reaction from the public and his targeted
commissioners.
“I guess my message isn't super focused but
my hope is just to make people think outside
their normal boundaries, to think about the
current mess we're in and how we got here,”
says Trollz.
But any reaction is a good reaction. Even
if that reaction is just tearing the message
down! “It makes me smile when people go
around just ripping off the messages and not
taking the whole piece down. It means what
I said actually got to them. I also dig it when
people write their own messages over them,
even when they tell me to ‘shut the f**k up!’,
Stuff like that only makes me want to do it
more!”
+
ALTHOUGH CLEARLY UNEDUCATED IN ART
history, I have a deep admiration for the
inspiring art-work these talented artists have
produced. My kinship with silent crusaders
created by Trollz initially started in Auckland
central where the picket ‘Respect existence or
expect resistance’ caught my eye. However,
during a time where our city’s Square had
been transformed into a free-of-charge camp
site, I assumed it was a part of the soon-to-be
redundant occupy-Auckland protest.
It wasn’t long before the trolls set their sights
on bigger targets, migrated north and, with
vengeance, spread their propaganda around
the so-called affluent northern suburbs
surrounding the university. This time their
messages were a little more restive – ‘It’s
time to unfuck the world’ and other messages
that poked fun at the status-quo of ‘consume,
deplete, repeat’, making me reason that these
lippy creatures were smarter than originally
credited, realising that if people actually
gave them a chance then the fog that covers
society’s eyes may eventually lift. Which, to
my mind, is a small success for my vicarious
alter-ego, because many who surround me
appear to be preoccupied with a state of
satisfaction and a reluctance to question
society. And if nothing else is to come from
Trollz’s campaign, the awe-inspiring irony of
watching a subordinate employee diligently
removing a ‘Think for yourself’ and ‘You can’t
stop us now’ from his employer’s facilities
would easily suffice.
As expected, it was a real pleasure to talk to
Trollz regarding his own art and his opinions on
others. I would like to thank him for agreeing
to talk – he’s an interesting guy. Head over to
his Tumblr trollzbtrollin.tumblr.com to check
out more of his work, as well as checking out
his instagram at #trollz_b_trollin for some more
insights from him.
39
FEATURE
Morgan Browne talks (and laughs) new poems, old poems, and poets with Sam Hunt.
PLAY IT AGAIN, SAM
Sam Hunt is New Zealand’s pre-eminent poet. He has been writing poems almost all his life and has toured New Zealand and beyond for
over 40 years. His impressive number of publications and his memorable performances contribute to his popularity and wide readership.
He has read his work in Australia, New York, and Washington DC, and is best known for his performances in pubs, bars, and concert venues.
He was awarded a Queen’s Service Medal in 1986 for his contribution to New Zealand poetry.
i
sat down with him in a little café in
Dargaville, Northland, near where he
lives, and shared a bottle of red wine
on a drizzly Sunday afternoon, weather
which he said he very much enjoyed. I found
him engaging, awe-inspiring, and humorous,
and greatly appreciated his time to give me
an interview as he has been declining to give
any to anyone else since the release of his
new book, Knucklebones.
+
MASSIVE: You are New Zealand’s most
published and popular poet. It must have
been an incredible achievement for you
having a top-selling book. What’s next on
the horizon?
SAM HUNT: Another top selling poetry
book! (laughs) Next on the horizon? New
poems, particularly. For me, I go over the
stepping stones up the river of poems, that’s
the immediate thing and what matters to me
most. Every so often a book, album, or film
40
happens involving oneself, but I don’t really
think in terms of making a book – that comes
as a result of getting the poems down. That’s
the poet’s job – to get the poems down. I’m
not a poet when I’m not putting a poem
down, I’m somebody waiting for a poem. I
can’t even work out how people can say they
go on to write a book of poetry. I think of it
in terms of poem by poem. Story, genesis
and ending. I suspect some people write
poetry but they’re not really writing poems,
so I make a big distinction. Same with the
teaching of the subject. When people are
teaching so-called ‘poetry’ they forget that it’s
about poems. Lecturers and English teachers
often seem to think that the theory on what
poetry is is more important than the poems
that make up that tradition. So next on the
agenda are new poems! I’ve been working
on a bunch of new poems just lately called
‘Tomorrow or Today’. Great poet W H Auden
once said “The only thing I don’t like about
writing poems is the dread that it may be my
last one.” Everything else is cool! (laughs)
What I’ve been doing lately is having to say
a word or a phrase like, doubtless, knucklebones is a bit like throwing a rope out on
the ground and it is random how it falls, but
you know that within that space that is where
your poem is. If I was still around in 10 or
20 years’ time I may say something quite
different, but for now it seems to be the most
productive way to work. Tapping into the
subconscious all the time, finding different
ways to do things to suit the occasion.
M: to succeed in a small country like New
Zealand, one may feel like they have to
write for popular culture. What do you think
about this?
SH: I think that’s shit. Full stop. (laughs)
M: Was there a particular defining moment
in your early years that cemented your
passion and your dedication to your poetry?
SH: There were a number of such moments.
Some of which that I can remember and
others that I can’t. There was a moment
when I was 14 and I was wagging school yet
again. I had gone out to Castor Bay beach
[Auckland] for the day. I’d be there all day,
went swimming – all sorts of things. I used
to often meet my girlfriend there! But over
this particular day I was walking down
where the Castor Bay bus ended its route on
a, what was then, a gravel road to the sea. I
couldn’t quite see the sea. I’m in this moment
of walking without my school shoes on, with
the whole day free ahead of me from all that
shit at school and saying aloud, but nobody
could hear me – ‘I want this moment to last
forever’. Whenever I go back and encounter a
poem – they often seem to come towards you
at a very fast speed – whenever that moment
comes, you want that moment to last forever.
There were those moments, this one being
the most powerful one in those six quick
steps on the road. I’m really hitched to this
memory. Not deliberately or consciously but
it has been coming back to me a lot lately.
M: Your poetry is much more than it is on
the written page. Is it your delivery of your
poetry, being the man and the voice that are
the instruments that qualifies your poetry
as ‘road-songs’? Is that how your poetry is
received best?
SH: For me, the poem is just as much a piece
of music as the music that you listen to. The
poem written down on the page is not actually
the poem. That’s the score of the poem. The
poem really finds its place, for me, when I
hear it. Usually, if I’m lucky and the poet’s
still alive, by the poet themselves. We can’t
listen to Shakespeare now. We can’t listen to
so many of the poets we wish we could. Not
all poets do justice to their poems, either,
though. A great friend of mine, Alistair Te
Ariki Campbell, was a wonderful poet and I
don’t mean he just worked from the page, but
you had to take it from the page and not from
him. Because when he said it, he killed it.
Asides from that, the poem in its full glory is
there to be told. My mantra is ‘Tell the story,
tell it true, charm it crazy’. Anything short of
that is a cop-out.”
M: You won the hearts and the minds of the
people of New Zealand – what would you
say about how the literary establishment
views and interprets your poetry?
SH: (laughs) I don’t give a fuck!
M: Do you think that your poetry is as valid
and valued today as it was when you first
wrote it – does it still mean the same to
people?
SH: Yes. I hope the answer is yes. Obviously
it wouldn’t with every poem. In some ways
it becomes more relevant over the years.
History comes around and you go “Oh, I
wrote about this 20 years ago, beat them
to it!” It is a bit like dreams. Dreams can
predict things. It is a similar process between
dreaming and encountering a poem.
M: What sparks an urge to begin a poem?
It would be too easy to say that it is magic.
But it would probably be the most honest
answer. I don’t know, but at the same time I
do have a few theories. A poem usually sparks
from a couple of words rubbing together and
sparking each other off. “Thick with light” or
something. It may be enough to just start. I’ve
never written a poem about anything, I just
find out later that it is about something. But I
wasn’t setting out to write a poem about that.
M: Poets often write for a reaction, positive
or negative. Is it fair to say that readers
extend the same reaction towards the poet?
SH: I don’t know that a poet writes for
a reaction! I don’t. I write for a personal
reaction within myself. I’ll then try it out on
an audience or a friend. It’s up to the readers
how they view the poet. I’m not inside their
heads. Well, not personally – my poem
may be! (laughs) Let me quote a wonderful
SAM HUNT’S new book, Knucklebones, has
just been published and is available at most
bookstores. It covers a span of 50 years of his
poems in chronological order 1962 to 2012.
A film in the New Zealand Film Festival 2011
made about Sam Hunt called Sam Hunt: Purple
Balloons and Other Stories is now also out in
DVD stores.
definition of poetry. Dylan Thomas, a Welsh
poet, once was asked “What is poetry?” He
replied, “Poetry, madam, is what makes me
laugh or cry or yawn, what makes my toenails
twinkle, what makes me want to do this or
that or nothing. Makes you feel alone but
not alone. All that matters about poetry is
the enjoyment of it, no matter how tragic the
poem”. You have to give the poem a chance to
be heard. One of my pet hates is the fact that
poetry has been stolen since the invention of
the alpha printing press 450 years ago. Poetry
has been taken from the people who only
the educated could read. In a conspiratorial
way, poetry has been taken but it has come
back through song. That is what I love about
Leonard Cohen and Bob Dylan – people
ask “is this poetry?” And I go “of course it’s
fucking poetry, it is poetry in its highest
order! It has been heard, it is out there.
M: You have been variously described as
being debauched and a drunkard. What
would you say to people that have called you
this?
SH: I would say they are absolutely right!
(laughs) Right first time! (laughs) Would
you like me to continue? I could go on for a
long time! (laughs) I don’t consider myself
debauched. My lifestyle could be said by
some to be outrageous but I don’t see it as
that. I have always lived my life as honestly
as I can and I don’t really give a fucking toss
if somebody says “oooh he should be doing
this or that”. When I was younger I felt under
a lot more pressure than I do now. It is easier
now. In my 20s there was a lot of drinking
taking place – a lot of working at night, doing
shows. I spent my whole life doing shows.
Naturally, there is a lifestyle that is different
to somebody living the suburban dream. I
have two kids, though, so I’m getting closer
to the suburban dream! (laughs)
M: Poets have been recognised as being
tortured souls. How much truth is there to
this?
SH: A lot! A lot! Tragic and tormented,
that would be right. Anyone who has got
any sensitivity to their life and others about
them can’t help but become tormented. Not
because you’re a poet but because you’re a
human being. Because you’re a member of a
fairly fucked human race. That is where the
torment would start coming. If you happen
to write poems about it, well that is a bonus.
Also, poets don’t always have this reputation.
There have been many poets who have lived
very straight lives, great poets. An obvious
example is English poet Philip Larkin – all
these poets who have cushy jobs in university
English departments. It doesn’t mean they
don’t write good poems. But most of them
write shit. Just absolute crap. Some people
have never written a proper poem. Just
borrowed bullshit. But, there are some. C K
Stead was a university man. People would say
if you’re an academic you’re stuffed as far as
poetry goes, though I wouldn’t go with that. I
know someone who is a grave digger and that
is every bit as honest a job as anything else!
M: Many poets are often only appreciated
after death. You’ve achieved the nearly
impossible by making a living out of your
poetry. Is it a poor existence?
SH: No. It has dodgy moments! No regular
pay check but I didn’t once expect that I
would get that. I somehow always knew that
I would cope okay. My father, who was a
wonderful lawyer, never made a lot of money
because he helped people who couldn’t afford
to pay him, and I learnt a lot from that man.
You have enough answers from me now for
5,000 interviews! (laughs).
41
FEATURE
DON’T GET ME WRONG, I LOVE HIGHER
education. I love how the Wellington Massey
campus is on the same street as the city
homeless shelter. I love how, as I crossed the
pedestrian crossing to campus one day, an
old woman stopped, looked me in the face,
and screamed “Fuck ya! Ya piece of shit!
You’re just a shit-faced cunt!” I love how that
be normal, and instead all I could do was
accuse myself of not being able to.
Instead, I had to say, fuck you, I want out of
your silly game and your silly rules that are
society. And instead of causing trouble and
rocking the boat and screaming and shouting
and getting wasted like every other good but
misguided person, I internalised that anger,
‘I couldn’t make it to classes any longer, nor could I even concentrate
enough to read any sort of text book; my mind was purely a tornado of
negative, distorted interpretations threating to kill me.’
Continuing from a place of dark depression, Max Bell finds that managing yourself is the first step to anything else.
This article continues this two-part journey through depression. Part 1 appeared in the July MASSIVE. You can read
it online at www.massivemagazine.org.nz
REALITY ON DEPRESSION - PART TWO
“If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.” - 1984
i
recently met my father at a cafe. To this
day I know nothing about this figure
who, to me as a child, was always so tall
and always smelt like leaves or grass or
sawdust. In spite of growing up in the same
house as him, I feel like I’ve never met the man.
So having lunch, I asked him about his past.
“I had a breakdown when I was 19. I was
never the same since. The rest of my life was
wondering around not achieving much, and
taking drugs. I was surprised your mother
took an interest in me.” That’s it? What a way
to sum up your life, what a message to pass
on to your sons when they’re just as lost in
life as you are! What a way to continue the
cycle, to pass on your depression and a life of
underachieving to your offspring!
Where’s at least a spark of recognition that
your sons are going through what you went
through? Where’s the guidance? Where’s the
fatherly love that we never had? Just show
42
some remorse, or at least some emotion
other than withdrawal and self-pity! If you
broke down when you were 19, why did you
just watch as I went through the same thing
around the same age? If you know what it
feels like, why didn’t you warn me? Why
didn’t you help me? Why didn’t you prepare
me for or protect me against the pain? WHAT
THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!
My brother once told me that if he ever met
our dad again he was going to punch him in
the face.
I realised I had put too much faith in and
expected too much from the immature man
who was essentially a boy masquerading in
a man’s body – a boy playing dad without
knowing, or even caring, how to.
I needed to change, to move on. I tried to get
over whatever the indescribable affliction
smothering me was. I tried to act normal. I
tried to show up to lectures, to sit down and
study, to get on with life. But by that point in
the semester I couldn’t make it to classes any
longer, nor could I even concentrate enough
to read any sort of text book; my mind was
purely a tornado of negative, distorted interpretations threating to kill me. I got so far
behind in studying that I dropped down from
four papers to one. I had essentially become a
part-time extramural student, even though I
lived right next to campus.
What was me and what was the depression?
I no longer knew. I had never known. Were
all my neurochemicals and serotonin levels
and hormones and whatever in me in such
a messed up state that they controlled who I
was more than I did? What caused it? Was
the monster a personality weakness or was it
an illness?
+
llustrations by Diana Russell
drunk homeless lady tried to intimidate me
by yelling in my face. And I love how I had
the option to put in my headphones and walk
the rest of the way to Massey in an iPodinduced haze of Eminem screaming hatred,
at times giving voice to his own depression,
and transforming it all into an art-form that
sells millions. What’s the difference between
him and that insane homeless lady? What’s
the difference between me and that insane
homeless lady? Where is this mental illness
of depression going to make me end up?
I couldn’t get her out of my mind. She
signified my rock-bottom. I had some options
left to me: suicide was the alluring promise
of a pleasant and taboo escape, the forbidden
apple in the Garden of Eden. Ending up
like her – homeless, loveless, overlooked as
beyond hope by society – was the scare tactic.
I needed to force myself into taking action.
I had some jewellery of the blonde girl’s in my
flat in Wellington, something she forgot to put
on again when she left for Auckland. I finally
put it in an envelope and mailed it back to
her. After leaving the post office, I realised I
should have couriered it rather than send it in
the general post. Sure enough, she informed
me she’d received my letter, along with an
already-opened envelope and an attached
sticker saying it had been “Damaged in
transit”... which was really code from the post
office for “Someone working in our company
has realised what you posted in here, opened
your envelope, stole it, and decided to still be
a dick and process it anyway.”
The sticker became another kick in the
stomach, a message to me saying “Fuck you,
you idiot for posting something expensive.”
Although I couldn’t help but feel gratified
at her losing something valuable. I hope
she knows frustration. Screw her. I hate the
blondie on a bench.
I remembered once being asked as a teenager
by my best friend “Why can’t you just be
normal?” and I didn’t have an answer. I still
don’t. I was meant to go along with some
game that I didn’t understand and never
wanted to play in the first place. As I grew
older, I was meant to lie down and fit in and
I took it personally. And it killed me, slowly
piece by piece until I was just a shell, a walking
machine that could no longer go on living
because somewhere along the way I stopped
living a long time ago and I became just a rote
robot. I went along with the motions and the
long game and the never-ending dance, and
I worked and I contributed to society and I
could have had kids, but the only way I could
do that peacefully was if I became depressed
or was drugged into submission. I was at
war with myself. Rather than having the
courage to be a revolutionary, I forced myself
into submission through an unconscious
numbing of my own mind. I hurt myself.
I lost the battle, on purpose, before it ever
started.
+
THE SCHOOL SYSTEM HAS ITS PRIORITIES
wrong. I was required to be taking accounting
and statistics, before I dropped them, and
those subjects are all very well and good at
some point in the future, but how were they
meant to help me then? How was I meant
to survive through the day or the week or
the month? How was I meant to not step in
front of a bus when it ventured hazardously
and alluringly past the Wellington campus on
Wallace St?
Emotional intelligence, social skills …
these things are never taught. There’s an
brain, who are not able to fit into the tacit
assumptions that underlay every upwardspiralling system?
These people can just be ruled off as
casualties to the great progress of man, can’t
they? This life, this academic achievement
and career success all hinges on being able to
manage yourself first – to actually be able to
go to a lecture, or go to work, or think clearly
without having a pair of glasses in front of
your eyes constantly covered in rain drops
that you’re unable to ever take off.
How does the university system deal with
this? I found guidelines intended for staff on
the Massey website of signs that may indicate
a student would benefit from referral to
Student Health and Counselling. But what
happens when depression is involved? What
happens with those who are unable to seek
help? Because the ultimate “fuck you” to the
sufferers from whoever invented depression
is that one of the symptoms is you don’t want
to seek help. You don’t think you deserve
treatment. You feel worthless. You feel guilty
for being a strain on the system, and in the
end this ultimately costs everyone more time
and money as they clean up the mess you
leave behind when you live a life of ruin, and
potentially pass those problems on to your
partner or your kids or those around you.
Or you decide to end it faster and potentially
kill an innocent by guiding your car into an
oncoming truck, having it knock the wreckage
of your car out of control to spiral into the
rear passenger seat of a car holding a young
child, and just spread the trauma further on
your escape from the hell on earth that you
perceive the inside of your mind to be.
For something that affects so many people,
there’s not enough acknowledgment. There’s
too much ignoring the issue and people
hoping that if we just leave such and such
a relative in the family alone then they’ll
eventually get over it and go back to being
normal, and we can carry on watching TV
and living life again, and she’ll stop slicing
her arms open or he’ll stop drinking himself
to oblivion every other day.
‘I remembered once being asked as a teenager by my best friend “Why can’t
you just be normal?” and I didn’t have an answer. I still don’t.’
assumption that you’re meant to learn
them somewhere “out there” in the world.
Massey offers a few lectures at lunchtime on
‘wellbeing’ and ‘stress’ and ‘mindfulness’ and
the like. But what happens to those who don’t
learn these? What happens to those who
don’t have a stable household or a well-built
society to model after, the people who have
never had these things hard-wired into their
I would walk around and see friends and they
would ask, “Hey, how’ve you been?” And I
avoided the question. I couldn’t just say I’d
been depressed. Why not? Because I was
afraid. There is a deep shame that goes along
with depression. There is also a judgment. I
could see it in their eyes ... and they wouldn’t
get back to me. Or, they would give me some
form of patronising pity, or a reply along the
43
FEATURE
I don’t mean to blame her for everything,
as I feel that attributing problems to just
one cause is overly simplistic for something
as complex and as beautiful as human
behaviour. Maybe I put too much meaning
into things – she signified foreign adventure
and sex and normalcy for me – maybe my
mind worked too differently, maybe I needed
gain or loss; difficulty concentrating; fatigue
and lack of energy; feelings of hopelessness
and helplessness; feelings of worthlessness,
self-hate, and guilt; becoming withdrawn or
isolated; loss of interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyed; trouble sleeping
or excessive sleeping; thoughts of death or
suicide.
Maybe I needed to shut out the world more than others, which is after all one
way SSRI anti-depressants are thought to work – to numb the emotions that
people feel, especially negative ones.’
lines of “Get over it” or some other misunderstanding that makes you feel even more
inadequate – such as they started telling
me a time that they felt ‘depressed’ and it
was nothing like what the word actually
means for those who know. Instead it was
something insipid along the lines of “I felt
down once. I needed to take a holiday.” Or “I
felt better after taking a walk on the beach.”
Or “I find singing gets me over those moods.”
And I just wanted to stab them in the eye to
make them ache like I ache. I just wanted
to tell them that the pain of the scars on my
arms was nothing compared to the mental
pain I was feeling when I put them there. I
wanted to redefine the word ‘depression’ in
the dictionary into some sort of metaphor
portraying utter self-hell.
The author William Styron insightfully
explained the shortcomings of such a
common word by explaining that it’s “used
indifferently to describe an economic decline
or a rut in the ground, a true wimp of a word
for such a major illness.”
+
44
“WHEN WE WERE YOUNG WE DREAMED OF
adventures and great deeds. Of a creative
and energised life. This is our birthright and
we need to recapture it.” I read that phrase
in a book, The New Manhood, while I was
sitting in a cafe in Auckland in March not
hanging out with a blondie on a park bench.
Was life meant to be that way? All I wanted
was an answer. Or an explanation, or a lie,
or something. Just tell me it would all be
okay. Tell me there was some meaning to the
suffering. Tell me there was something else at
the end other than death and numbness. Tell
me anything. Just don’t leave me alone in the
darkness forever. I decided I would change or
die. Those were my only two options.
I woke up after sleeping 17 hours straight and
walked to Student Health and Counselling
to see a doctor. I walked out of the doctor’s
office with a prescription for three different
things and a recommendation for one other
supplement. Only one was a psychoactive
drug which was an anti-depressant, fluoxetine (aka prozac); the rest were things,
essentially pretty harmless, that revolve
around its purpose.
I finally decided I needed professional help.
Depression is best treated by a triad of
medication, therapy, and lifestyle changes. So
I started seeing a counsellor, I started reading
a ton of self-help books, and I got back into
the habit of exercising which had practically
kept me sane for the past few years. I also
needed to be constantly at garrison to catch
and restructure my thoughts – thoughts that
have been built over a lifetime of bad habitual
thinking, and no one pointing out to me, or
me never realising, that thoughts should be
any other way.
I hadn’t talked to the blondie on the bench
in a while. However, via the strange works of
Facebook I sent her a draft of this memoir.
She said that it was impressive and also “I’m
still sorry. When all that happened I was
hoping I wouldn’t make things worse for you
... but apparently I did.”
“Thank you,” I said. “Sex is a fascinating
game in that it plays so much with human
emotions.”
It is a dangerous game, the world is a
dangerous place. I often wonder if it’ll be
easier not to play. However, the colourblindness was starting to lift and I remembered that the world was actually a place of
colour and resplendence, if you chose to look
at it through the right frame.
llustrations by Diana Russell
to shut out the world more than others, which
is after all one way SSRI anti-depressants are
thought to work – to numb the emotions that
people feel, especially negative ones. There
are millions of these insidiousness things
in the world being taken daily and their
exact function on the human brain is still
not understood. As disturbing a thought as
that is, maybe depressives are just too damn
sensitive to operate optimally in this world.
On the night before the exam for the
one paper I was still managing to take, I
sat on the floor of my new apartment, an
apartment that my mother had paid for to get
me out of my old funereal flat and its even
more depressing company, and I tried to
catch up in one night for the remaining study
that I was unable to do for months. Instead,
I understandably panicked. I should have
avoided the stress, knowing that depression
is my coping strategy. I became anxious and
tossed and turned in bed and got only two
hours’ sleep before I woke to the sound of
my alarm clock, managed to find my antidepressant in the bathroom mirror cabinet,
and then fell back under my covers again.
I slept through the exam. I slept through
life, like Elizabeth Wurtzel’s dad in ‘Prozac
Nation’. I missed the e and submitted for
aegrotat. But I should have at least attended
it so I could file for impaired performance for
the parts I hadn’t managed to study for.
But mental illness doesn’t fit so neatly into
the little categories of the bureaucratic
separation between aegrotat and impaired
performance. The night before, I didn’t know
whether I would wake up being capable of
facing the world or not. Depression can’t be
as neatly quantified as falling down the stairs
and breaking your arm and being unable to
write in an exam. No one can objectively look
at your mind from the outside and know for
certain that it’s fractured and needs a cast
and prevents you from being able to write
or think. The difficult thing about the mind
is that it’s all subjective, and it changes daily.
The symptoms of depression can include:
agitation, restlessness, and irritability;
dramatic change in appetite, often with weight
Depression is defined as a mood disorder. It
is both an illness and a social problem. It is
characterised by low mood, low self-esteem,
and negative distorted thinking. It often feels
like you’re in a fog, a bell-jar, a black shadow.
It’s a multi-faceted illness that can’t be easily
defined. As chaotic and as beautiful as people
are, it seems depression comes in that many
forms and has that many influences.
+
THERE IS NO SINGLE THEORY THAT CAN
explain it and no single treatment that can
be used to solve it. It is known that there
is some biochemical component, some
genetic component, some early childhood
component, some self-esteem component,
and so on, to cover a lot of explanatory areas.
But how to pull it all together, not just focus
on one miniscule area while trying to break a
person down into parts, is beyond the health
practitioners who claim to be able to treat
it. And while we wait for an answer, while
the psychologists and the psychiatrists and
the youth counsellors and the pharmaceutical industry and the researchers and the
DSM and everyone and his dog continues to
debate it, the rates of depression continue
to increase. There is a silent epidemic going
on that no one understands – not those who
suffer from it, not those who treat it, not
those who watch loved ones go through it.
I have to express my belief that it’s all one
New Zealand” became an engine of selfdestruction. It was, of course, not meant to
be that way.
I have yet to hear back about the aegrotat, or
hear back about the limited fulltime student
allowance from StudyLink due to disability
from mental illness, and I lost the fees from
the three papers I dropped. I also have yet
to decide how many papers I will be able to
study next semester. I am still searching, I
am still confused and angry, and my degree is
going to take an extra year, or possibly more
… that is if I don’t cave in again further down
the track.
I’ve set up appointments to see two psychologists specialising in different areas, I’ve
found a men’s group to start attending, and
I’ve seriously collected a metre-high pile of
books in my lounge that I’m reading through,
as well as a list of bookmarked websites to
read and online lectures to watch. All of this
research is to try to find an answer for how
to survive with myself. There has to be a way
through it, at the risk of sounding clichéd –
like a depression hand-out in a doctor’s office.
I wonder if I figure out the ‘how’ to life,
then will I be happy? For me, the solution is
knowing how not to break down. Knowing
how to resist the morbid urge to hold my
hand in the flame a second longer than I
should, knowing full well that fire equals pain
but not caring.
Solve this, and I think you’re doing alright
in life. I think you’ve succeeded. Managing
yourself is the first key to doing anything
else. Figure out how to work with yourself
and you’re at least on track to surviving “New
Zealand’s defining university” and cultivating
a happy, fulfilled life. Underneath it all, that
is what any of us really want, is to be happy.
What I have figured out thus far is what I
don’t want ... and that is to weaken and fall
apart at the seams into what I had in the past.
I don’t want to continue the vicious cycle that
is passed on from father to son, from one
generation to the next, and that is going on
in my head constantly. Maybe this institution
really is the honorary sanatorium to be at to
work towards a new life.
‘Depression is defined as a mood disorder. It is both an illness and a social
problem. It is characterised by low mood, low self-esteem, and negative
distorted thinking.’
big – in fact, monumental - fuck-up of the
human race to understand ourselves. I have
so much angst directed at nothing, no enemy
to aim it at, so in the past I became my own
target, and the majority of my time turned
into feeling sad and lonely and scared and
pathetic. Any potential I once had was turned
inwards and burned, the “Engine of the New
Do you want to tell your own story?
MASSIVE magazine is always looking
for Creative Non-fiction submissions for
publication.
To find out how to submit content email
editor@massivemagazine.org.nz
45
FEATURE
MILLS AND POON: DICK HARDY & JENNA TALIA
Dick Hardy continues with tales of his latest sexual adventures at Albany’s famous
Fergusson Bar. By popular demand, Jenna Talia reveals that she has some adventures
of her own and takes on a long, but invigorating, ride home from the Erotica Expo.
O
he Ferguson Bar was packed and
I was in the middle of a conversation with a good friend of mine.
She was a gorgeous blonde who
I had hooked up with a few times and our
conversation lingered between flirtation and
sexual tension. We joked about how we felt
like the oldest people there and reminisced
about younger days when we were the babies
of Ferg.
I reminded her of those younger days when
she would call me baby in the bedroom. Her
alcohol confidence stopped her from blushing
and instead she bit her lip and fixed me with
a sultry gaze. I stood closer to her, ready to
re-ignite old passions when I noticed another
friend coming toward me. She called out to
me and greeted me with a tight embrace. She
was originally a brunette, but tonight her
hair had been dyed bright red and she looked
exotic and luscious.
I introduced her to my blonde friend and
we all began dancing and talking together. I
decided to lead them to the busy dance floor;
it always looked good to be caught between
two gorgeous girls. I knew both girls were
attracted to me – I could tell by the way their
eyes kept catching mine and the too-common
brushes of skin against skin. Finally, I decided
to spice things up. Standing between them
I leaned toward the redhead and, keeping
46
my eyes locked with the blonde, I leaned in
and merged our lips. I saw the initial look of
disappointment and then excitement from
the blonde. Then I reversed the technique
and, keeping eye contact with the redhead,
leaned over and kissed the blonde. Then I
leaned back and smiled gently, to ease any
apprehension.
Both girls followed my lead and smiled. Then
they circled me hungrily and began dancing
on either side of me and I felt four hands
sliding all over my body. We were surrounded
by drunk, dancing teenagers and nobody
noticed their eager fingers racing beneath my
shirt and then, although I wasn’t sure whose
hands they were (maybe both), slipping down
the front of my pants and began to massage
my member.
Suddenly the music changed and I begin to
grin wildly as I recognised a familiar tune.
It was a dubstep remix to I Kissed a Girl by
Katy Perry, and I stepped out from between
the girls, hands still fondling me. I pushed
them together and told them I loved this
song. They took the hint and looked at each
other. They had had a bit to drink and I could
tell they were both aroused.
As the chorus came on they laughed and the
redhead lunged in, gripping the blonde by
the waist. They began making out fiercely
and I watched in fascination as they pressed
themselves against each other. It was then
that I realised their antics had begun to get
attention and I broke them up briefly.
“Maybe we should take this somewhere more
private,” I suggested, and they agreed. They
each said goodbye to the people they had
come with and with hands in mine, I took
them to my car.
“How about we go back to mine?” I asked,
uncertain if they would be brave enough.
But they both seemed more excited than I
did, and jumped in the back seat together
as an answer. I got in the driver’s seat (I was
sober – safety first!) and, trying not to speed,
headed for my house … and almost crashed
when I looked in the rear view mirror to see
them all over each other, hands lost from view
beneath dresses and skin. I had to turn the air
con on high to stop the windows from fogging
up! I knew then I was in for an amazing night.
Unfortunately, that’s all I have time for this
time, but stay tuned for the next edition to
hear how my night ended!
+
JENNA TALIA AND THE LONG WAY HOME
So, thanks to everyone showing their support
for my article last week – the editor of
MASSIVE has asked me to continue writing!
When I asked what I should write about, I
was told to give a run through of one of my
more ‘racy’ escapades so readers could get to
know me a little better. I think I have one that
fits that description.
A girlfriend and I had decided to attend an
erotica expo. The day had been filled with
gorgeous girls, hunky half-naked men, and
a general air of sex. I had watched in fascination as my friend took a vodka shot from
the cleavage of one of the promo girls. And
she had squeezed my hand in encouragement
when I got called on to the stage to have the
Men of Steel rub their oiled muscles all over
my body.
I must say the day had made us both quite
flustered. We browsed through the huge
variety of vibrating, slippery, big and small
products, each of us giggling like excited
schoolgirls. Both of us are quite adventurous,
and in the end we decided to each buy a
variety pack which contained an assortment
of goodies.
And finally we decided to call it a day and
head home. Unfortunately, it was more than
an hour’s drive to get home. It hadn’t been 10
minutes in the car before I noticed my friend
rifling through her purchases.
“I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to get
home to use these,” she said. She pulled out a
large pink vibrator and turned it on. “I think I
found my new best friend!” she laughed.
“You are so horny,” I told her, “But I can’t say
I wasn’t a little hot under the collar when I
was up on stage! The things I would’ve done
to him if there wasn’t an audience!”
We both laughed, aware of the long and
frustrating ride home. I looked over at my
friend and I saw she was testing the vibrator
out on her arm.
“How’s it feel?” I asked curiously, at which
she reached over and pressed it to my chest,
aiming for my nipples.
“You tell me!” Even through my bra, the
vibrations were strong and felt good.
“Daaamn, I’m glad I bought one of those too,”
I said, but pushed her away so as not to get
distracted from driving.
“Oh, come on, don’t be such a prude,” she
laughed, and forced it back at me.
“Stop, I’ll crash,” I laughed, but was wary to
push her away, choosing to focus on the road
instead.
“You’ll be fine!” she assured me and cheekily
moved the vibrator down to my navel. Then
suddenly she thrust it at my crotch and I
squealed in surprise. She held it there with
a devilish grin and I squirmed in my seat,
trying to keep my attention on the road.
Suddenly I realised that the vibrations were
moving through my clothes to a spot deep
inside that had been building in anticipation
the entire day.
“Ooh, you like it!” my friend exclaimed
happily. I nudged at the disturbance between
my legs, trying to get away from the feelings
that I couldn’t help to enjoy. Then, almost
without being aware of it, I let out a slight
moan. I looked quickly in embarrassment
to my friend to see if she had realised that
her joke was becoming something more and
I was shocked at the look on her face. Her
pupils were dilated and her cheeks slightly
flushed. In that moment we both realised
how aroused the day had made us, and my
friend seemed to be getting off on the idea of
my helpless desire.
Then slowly, as if unsure she should continue,
she reached over and began to unbutton my
jeans. She stared at my face the whole time,
checking to see if I would let her. I watched
the road intently, rippling with nerves, but
at the same time too turned-on to stop her.
Then, taking my silence as acceptance, she
pressed the squirming machine down to a
place that I knew was becoming increasingly
wet. The intensified feelings raced through
my body, and I pressed my mound hard
against the dildo, forgetting any shame.
I was driving more slowly and I turned my
indicator on to pull over. As the car came to
a stop, a feeling that had been building in me
all day washed over my body in a powerful
orgasm and I released an unrestrained
groan of pleasure. I felt the pressure let off
as my friend went to pull her hand away but
I gripped her hand, pulling her hard back
against me. I began to spasm in my seat
uncontrollably as waves of pleasure took
control of me.
Finally, too sensitive to go on, I pushed her
away and collapsed into my seat with what
was no doubt a dopey grin on my face. After
a few minutes of silence I looked over to my
friend who burst into a smile. We were both
shocked at what had just happened and
weren’t quite sure how to deal with it.
Finally she spoke. “That was so sexy.”
We both cracked up laughing at how quickly
things had escalated. We talked for a while
about how crazy we both are and, in the end
I got my friend to drive the rest of the way
home.
So that was my ‘racy’ story, and hopefully
that helps my readers get to know a little
more about me: that I know how to have a
good time!
Until next time, Jenna Talia
47
Damaged
Candy
BOUTIQUE
Sweetness gone BAD!
FIFTY SHADES OF F**KED UP – REALLY
Yvette Morrissey takes a closer look at the book that is rebranding the phrase ‘Mummy-Porn’
FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, BY E.L. JAMES, HAS
become an instant hit, selling more than 31
million copies worldwide and claiming the title
of fastet-selling book of all time.
Dubbed ‘mummy-porn’, or ‘clit-lit’, Fifty Shades
of Grey is about innocent virgin Anastasia Steel
(Ana), who becomes involved with sexy and
rich businessman Christian Grey. They begin
a steamy BDSM (bondage, discipline, sadism,
and masochism) romance, set largely in the
American city of Seattle
The book started out as a fan-fic of Twilight by
Stephanie Meyer, but has since beaten its predecessor in sales. It seems women all around the
world are caught up in the Fifty Shades fantasy,
and the movie rights have recently been sold for
more than $5 million. Sex toy companies even
attribute the book for increased sales of their
products used by the main characters, with
some product sales rising by 400 per cent.
However, despite all the media hype, Fifty
Shades has disappointed critics, with many
labeling it “clunky and anti-feminist”.
A regular criticism is that the writing is terrible.
The book has been called “treacly cliche” by The
Telegraph. I think it is utter crap. Repetition is
a characteristic used heavily to the point that
even fans of the book will admit it. The words
“oh my” features 79 times in the first book, and
the phrase “ghost of a smile” is used three times
in the first 50 pages. Worst of all, James uses the
nauseating cliche “inner goddess”, to describe
Ana’s sexual alter-ego, 58 times.
The unrealistic characters are also a target for
criticism. Considering that Ana is an extremely
naive virgin, it comes as a surprise when she
becomes an instant sex goddess overnight.
Literally overnight. Christian is a billionaire and
CEO of his own company, devilishly handsome,
and has a big ... well, let’s just say he has a big
helicopter. He also donates a portion of his
billions to starving children in Africa. Aww.
GAG. He also never appears to do any work
48
throughout the book, and spends most of the
time having sex or stalking Ana. Should writing
like this earn an author millions? Is it even justifiable to call E.L. James an author?
Sheila O'Flanagan, an award-winning Irish
author doesn’t see what all the fuss is about,
either."I've read small parts of the trilogy. To be
honest, I love characters and I think the woman
in Fifty Shades is so pathetic that I couldn't
get past her. She's meant to be an intelligent
woman but she's just too silly for words,” she
openly told the media.
The first sex scene doesn’t appear until Chapter
10, so readers are left with the abrasive banter
of Anastasia debating whether a BDSM
relationship is what she wants. It isn’t. What
she wants is to heal Christian of his abusive
childhood which turned him into a sex-crazed
maniac, so they can develop a ‘normal’
relationship.
Anastasia’s love may be the remedy for Christian’s “fifty shades of fucked up,” as she refers to
him multiple times, but in reality this creates a
disturbing ideal of relationships to women.
The way Christian treats Ana is abusive, contract
or no contract. The first time he spanks her, she
cries, gets drunk, and refers to the spanking
as “he hit me”. Oh, but wait. After she sends
him emails saying she didn’t like the spanking
and feels as though she is a girl he likes to fuck
occasionally, he rushes to her and explains
that having control over her and causing her
physical pain turns him on. He then goes on to
say that he thought she enjoyed it because of the
evidence he found downstairs. Forget the crying
and the substance abuse, her hoo-hoo was alive
and kicking! She could have peed herself from
fright for all we know. Her tears then turned
to tears of joy, and all was well in spanky-land.
Here Christian demonstrates physical and
emotional abuse.
Women’s Refuge says psychological/emotional
abuse is about “manipulation and coercion, and
affects your emotions and personality, rather
than your body. Victims of emotional abuse can
feel like they are going mad, are very frightened,
and often feel like it’s their fault.”
Sound familiar? In one quick motion Christian
is able to convince Ana that it wasn’t his fault,
but hers, because to him, she enjoyed it. Oh,
but yes, he did give her a contract to sign, they
did discuss the places Ana wouldn’t go sexually,
but the fact she contradicts herself constantly
throughout the book gives the impression that
she is simply putting up with Christian’s kinks
so he won’t up and leave her.
In a blog, author and critic Marina Delvecchio
writes that “One of the many reasons women
don’t leave abusive relationships is because
the women believe that the men will change.
If a woman is patient enough, kind enough,
forgiving enough, then the man will be altered
by her love for him. This is not how it really is in
abusive relationships. People are how they are
designed, and abuse is abuse.”
Many times Ana admits to herself that her best
friend and parents wouldn’t approve of the
relationship if they knew of Christian’s ‘extracurricular activities’, hinting herself she doesn’t
see this as a healthy relationship. What guys
like Christian need is therapy, not whips and
nipple clamps. Another thing, Christian’s only
good qualities are that he is good-looking, rich,
and can play the piano. Are women really that
superficial? If Christian Grey was all of these,
but five foot tall with a hairy back, would women
find him as endearing?
Perhaps the only thing vaguely different about
Fifty Shades of Grey is the mostly vanilla,
occasionally riske sex scenes. If you really
must read this book, skip to chapter 10 and
save yourself the misery of James’ writing and
pathetic characters. Here’s an idea. Instead of
purchasing this book why not donate $20 to
Women’s Refuge? I’m sure they need it more
than James.
10% Discount For Students
With I.D.
George Street
Palmerston North
www.inktattoostudio.co.nz
61
It is important to encourage a culture of appreciation and respect for those who base their aspiring careers and
achievements around the passion they have for their creativity and talents. New Zealand no longer needs to be fed
on a culture of Tall Poppy Syndrome. Relish in the talents of your peers – those who study alongside you at the
same institution, those who you pass in the hallway, and those who you stand in the line with at the cafe, but who
you seldom get to appreciate for their hard work due to a difference in what your major is. The quality of work in
design and arts being produced at Massey is outstanding. KIlling it at Massey provides a platform on which our
artistically minded students can share their craft. Abigail Leggett talks to some of Massey’s talented students.
KILLING IT AT MASSEY
DENELLE&CHADWICK
Age: 19 Year: Two Degree: Photography Places of Origin: Blenheim & Australia
Denelle&Chadwick, is a collaborative
photography name that you should get
used to hearing. The 19-year-old duo began
photographing in a collaborative dimension
to provide a fresh take on what structures
photography generally takes in society. The
dynamic aspects that this collaboration
possesses show photography that has
utilised an equal balance of male and female
influence in the guise of self confessed
headstrong students with a passion for
still visual stimulation and evocation. This
provides a high-calibre quality to the stills
in the sense that both have a strong need for
their ideas to come across but both agree that
shooting together allows for them to draw on
each other’s strengths for a more seamless
and holistic approach to photo production
and development.
Photography has been a major part of both
of their lives. In terms of style, there isn’t
anything in particular that is a definite, they
confess. However, their artistic choices show
that their general photography objective
has a strong organic feel, in terms of what
subjects will be shot, and a definite focus
on high resolution, supreme definition and
outstanding clarity. A perfect example of this
is in the two photos featured in this article.
Clean, simple, natural beauty is portrayed
in the stunning images of Izzy Luseane and
Courtney Joe. The pair both quote Terry
Richardson as being an inspiration with
regards to their photography careers and
would like to thank Jane Wilcox and Shaun
Waugh (Massey Staff) for their help and
abundance of knowledge that they have
supplied to the pair. Check out more of the
duos work at denelleandchadwick.tumblr.com
or denelleandchadwick.wordpress.com.
JAKE FAIRWEATHER
Age: 20 Year: Third Degree: Fine Arts Place of Origin: Los Angeles
Born in the States, Jake actually spent
most of his youth in Christchurch. Moving
to Wellington after high school he began a
degree in Fine Arts with a passion for the oil
paint medium. Choosing this degree was an
easy choice for Jake as he felt “It seemed the
most open of all the degrees.” Two words to
describe Fairweather’s work are ‘atoms’ and
‘sinews’ with clear inspiration that can be
found coming in from the works of Rimbaud,
Van Gogh and the ever evolving human body.
This connection with certain physicalities of
the human body is depicted in his work and
also translates into his choice of his favourite
paper in his degree so far, ‘Drawing the
Body’. Jake’s art has a certain aesthetic to it
that compels the viewer to question what he
or she is seeing. There are so many hidden
ideas, sentiments and points to be made in
his work that make it beautiful in a world
all of its own. His pieces are honest and raw
yet beautiful and deviant and occasionally
frightening. When asked what life was like at
Massey for Jake he replied with. “To become
Riah King-Wall.” Who I later discovered to
be a friend of Jake’s. However it is this artistic
respect and appreciation that Jake has for
other Massey students such as King-Wall and
Samin Son, that has allowed Jake to learn
from and develop his own unique style.
Follow Jake’s journey through paintings at
jakef.tumblr.com.
Opposite page, TOP: Photographs of Issy Luseane (left) and Courtney Joe (right) by Denelle&Chadwick
BOTTOM: Two of Jakes paintings (photographed by Felicity Wren)
50
51
Where is the best place to find a bargain in New Zealand? Op-Shops have been steadily popping up all over
and make great places for students on a budget to shop. But where are the best ones? Each month MASSIVE
will send out two students from two different campuses to find a ‘new’ outfit for less than $25. This month
Rhiannon Josland and Catherine Irving take up the challenge
8pm Wednesdays @ The Southern Cross
OP-SHOP CHALLENGE
$100 bucks in vouchers to be won
Free to compete
RHIANNON JOSLAND
Free to play
Age: 20 Year: Three Degree: Graphic Design, Massey Wellington
You can’t put a price on freedom, but in
this instance, $25 to spend on clothing was
just the key I needed to unlock me from
the dungeons (Massey Wellington slang for
computer labs under the Museum building).
Money in hand, I ran for the hills and some
fresh air, winding up at Kilbirnie’s Opportunity for Animals.
The great thing about Kilbirnie is that for the
average op-shop goer, it’s a little too much
effort. If you want to walk there you have to
dress in sensible shoes, and that’s a fashion
faux par in itself. Luckily for me it meant no
changing room wait time and clear aisles. I
also didn’t feel the need to snake-eye any
potential item-snatchers.
As much as I am one for animal advocacy and
activist spirit, the best thing about Opportunity for Animals has got to be the free
bin. As a student, second hand clothing is
good, but free clothing is the pinnacle. From
this I found my shoes, gleaming up at me,
diamonds in the rough.
However now I was faced with tremendous
guilt of not having supported the animal
cause. I made my way to their sister store in
Newtown and brought a horse shirt for $4
to consolidate my animal affections. After
failing to find a cute clutch, I settled on a
crimped red headscarf accessory for $2.
Lastly it was round the corner to the old
Sallies in Newtown where I foraged through,
eventually finding my ¾ pants emblazoned
with zips for $7. An entire outfit for $13. I’m
quietly rather pleased with myself.
It’s true Wellington doesn’t have anything
that compares to Seekers, and you may
find a few extra scratches on your arm post
shopping, but nothing can beat the eclectic
array of clothing that Wellington op shops
seamlessly hoard. Now it’s time to make it up
to my sagging wardrobe rack…
04 384 9085
www.thecross.co.nz
39 Abel Smith St, Te Aro
CATHERINE IRVING
Age: 22 Year: Fourth Degree: Post graduate diploma in teaching, Massey Palmerston North
Anyone who knows Wanganui may
understand why I was apprehensive doing
this challenge in the holidays. Smelly and
unfashionable clothes anyone? Don’t get me
wrong, I love the little city, with or without
the ‘h’, but it isn’t exactly Cuba St.
Bracing myself and with my mum to my
right, I was about to learn that an ‘op-shop’
was more than a band. My focus was to get a
winter outfit which I could wear to classes. It
was good to have a focus but of course I was
bound to stray.
First stop was St Vincent De Paul’s. First
thing I spotted? Free rack! Minds out of the
gutter, people. Inside the shop, however,
was my first buy. It has nothing to do with
my finished outfit but, hey, didn’t I tell you
I’d stray? A maroon shirt with chiffon sleeves
and a heavily detailed body for a mere $2.
Next we went to The Salvation Army. There
was just so much to choose from but I was
52
set on this skirt from the very beginning.
The material is a luscious mixture of velvet
and chiffon, making it quite appropriate for
winter. I would probably team it with tights
and get so much wear from it for such little
money – only $5, to be exact.
I then picked up a short knit jumper to match.
At the counter I saw a box of socks. If you’re
thinking this is kind of gross, so was I. At
least you can wash socks, though so I decided
to get these instead of shoes to save my feet
from an unknown foot disease.
The final touches, courtesy of Hospice, are
these gold earrings and an outrageously ‘me’
necklace. At home I added on a chain at the
back to give it some length.
I was so impressed with how much I got for
only $20. Op shops you served me well and I
am so sorry for my past ignorance. I will visit
you all again soon because I am a changed
woman. I think even my mum is!
45
SPORTS
CHIEFS STORM HOME IN SUPER RUGBY FINAL
Jack Biggs examines the Chiefs 37-6 victory over the Sharks in the Super Rugby final
THE CHIEFS RAN IN THIRTY-SEVEN POINTS ON
their way to becoming the third New Zealand
franchise to win the coveted Super Rugby title.
Playing against a gritty, tough, yet fatigued
Sharks outfit who could muster only six points
proved why the Waikato-based side is very
much deserving of the title.
The Chiefs follow in the path of the Crusaders
and the Blues, the only other New Zealand sides
to have claimed the title in the competition’s
14-year history.
Unfortunately, as the Chiefs themselves
pounced on the opportunity so did the low-lifes
who targeted head coach Dave Rennie’s house
during the match. It was ransacked and many
valuables stolen.
“It certainly put a dampener on the night,”
Rennie said. “It is concerning. Unfortunately
there are people who prey on these situations.”
That aside, his first season as head coach of a
Super franchise could not have gone better. With
a classy coaching staff behind him, including
Wayne Smith, it has certainly been a marvel of a
season for this deserving side and coach.
Focusing on Rennie; he has achieved a lot in his
coaching career to date. Three Junior IRB World
Championships, an NPC title with Wellington
(2000) and a solid campaign by Manawatu over
the past few seasons who always punched above
their weight.
THE GAME
A 37-6 score line in a Super Rugby final is an
absolute thrashing. Finals rugby is supposed to
even-up the playing field, yet the Chiefs were
able to put their own finals horrors behind them
(61-17 loss to the Bulls in 2009) and run out
victors in Hamilton.
For the Sharks, who many were surprised when
they beat their South African conference rivals,
the Stormers, in the semi-final, it will be a tough
pill to swallow despite what the scoreline says.
The travel would have certainly taken a lot out
54
of them, yet the Chiefs thoroughly deserved the
home final after a stellar season. It is now the
fourth time the Sharks have finished runners-up.
The Chiefs scored the first of their four tries
early in the piece, with a try on the left flank
to Tim Nanai-Williams along with two Aaron
Cruden penalties before halftime.
In the second half they began to run away with
it as the floodgates began to open.
First, Kane Thompson took the ball from the
back off the scrum and charged his way over
despite the defence surrounding him. The TMO
gave it the green light.
Towards the end, the game became loose, and
Lelia Masaga pounced on a lost ball after a
strong Andrew Horrell tackle on his opposite
and ran in. Sonny Bill Williams would have the
last say, surprise, surprise. A huge gap left for
him under the posts capped off a superb season
for him in Chiefs’ and All Blacks’ colours. He
kicked off the party at Waikato Stadium by
launching himself into the crowd.
The Chiefs capped off their strong season with
a haka created for them by the Te Wharekura
O Rakaumanga School. This reflected on the
strong cultural significance and value the team
holds and the close bonds they share, which is
evident in their play.
“They’ve been a really tight group and enjoyed
each other’s company and they’ve worked hard
for each other and been there as a team for each
other” a proud Rennie said.
The Chiefs are very much deserving off this title
and the country seems thrilled for them after
playing a positive and exciting brand of rugby
all season long.
Now we look forward to a hotly contested
Rugby Championship which will be the real
indication of where this All Blacks outfit is at.
The unsuccessful Australians have had more
time to prepare as none of their sides made
the semi-finals. They believe they now have the
edge. We shall see…
KEY PLAYERS
SBW
What can’t this guy do? His X-factor alone
adds 10 points to a game and now he can
add the Super Rugby feather to his cap.
NRL title…boxing titles…Rugby World Cup
title…and now this. What’s left to achieve?
The shoulder charge crept in late in the
piece and he must be warming himself up
for the NRL next season, which I eagerly
await to see. SBW has evolved the game as
we know it. The offload is here to stay.
TAWERA KERR-BARLOW
A product of one of Rennie’s junior All
Blacks squads, Kerr-Barlow quickly stamped
his mark on the Chiefs by ousting main
stayer Brendon Leonard from his halfback
duties. This guy is young, confident, and
an exciting talent who is sure to be All
Black material. He was a huge part in this
team’s success working well in tandem with
Cruden.
AARON CRUDEN
What is there to say? This guy is a winner.
Brought into the World Cup late, he did a
remarkable job against the Australians in
the semi-final and now a year on is a Super
Rugby champion. Some people are born
winners, and Cruden is certainly up there.
Without a doubt he was the form five-eight
in the competition and lynchpin of the
Chiefs’ success. Hansen has a big decision
on who his number 1 No 10 is.
LIAM MESSAM
Thank God this guy is in the All Blacks,
particularly after the departure of Jerome
Kaino. I have been very critical of Messam in
the past as an international player because
he always seemed not quite ready. His
added responsibility within the Chiefs ranks
this season has shown he certainly is ready.
Messam is clearly in career best form and I
believe has made a huge claim for Kaino’s
jersey. His contest with Adam Thomson will
be exciting.
SPORTS
FRISBEE WORLD CHAMPS, THE ULTIMATE
Massey vet student Marloes Van Geel (bottom left) was selected to play for the New Zealand women’s team at the World Ultimate Frisbee championships
in July. She tells MASSIVE about her trip.
ALMOST A YEAR AGO I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO
be selected for the New Zealand women’s team
to play at the World Ultimate Frisbee championships in Sakai, Japan, from July 7 to 14. I
know most people who read this will have never
heard of ultimate Frisbee, and neither had I
before I started playing roughly eight years ago.
So what is it? The World Ultimate and Guts
website (WUGC) says describes Ultimate
Frisbee as “a team sport on a 100-metre grass
field with end zones similar to those used in
American football. Each team has seven players
on the field in games to 17 points. Teams
advance the disc by passing it to one another,
with one point scored for each time it’s caught
in the end zone. No player can run with the disc,
and the opposing team may intercept the disc
at any time.
“Athletes must possess an incredible combination of endurance, speed, agility, technique
and teamwork. Because the sport is played
without referees, the athletes share a strong
commitment to fair play, even in top competition. Players must arbitrate their own calls
in the heat of competition using a well-refined
system of rules.”
HERE’S MY DIARY FROM THE TRIP:
Wednesday July 4 - Friday July 6: The first
three days the team was in Japan were spent
acclimatising to the heat. Temperatures were in
the late 20’s to early 30’s but the high humidity
made playing in the heat almost unbearable.
We had a training game against a Japanese
University team and against the German
women’s team. Both were very difficult games
due to us not being used to the climate and
because we still had a lot of things to work out
as a team. We also had to figure out the public
transport system and we learnt the hard way
what happens if you don’t drink enough water
or if you forget to put sunblock on! The New
Zealand squad had roughly 70 people all staying
at the same motel in Namba, a popular tourist
destination in Osaka, so nights were spent
56
walking around and tasting all the delicious
food Japan had to offer.
Saturday July 7: The opening ceremony! I can
still remember seeing the New Zealand flag
being held up and how proud I felt to be part of
this whole experience. The New Zealand men’s
team was lucky enough to be selected to play
in the opening ceremony game against Japan
in front of a packed stadium crowd. Our boys
did incredibly well, but ultimately the Japanese
team showed the Kiwis why they were the No 1
ranked team in the world.
Sunday July 8: We kicked off the tournament
with a very hard game against Great Britain.
We were down by a lot of points and ended
up pulling it together to make it 15-15 with it
being a game to 16. Unfortunately, GB showed
they were stronger and won 16-15, which was
incredibly disappointing for us but at the same
time we were all stoked with how well we had
played. In the afternoon we had an easy win
over Singapore, 17-5.
Monday July 9: On day 2 we were thrashed by
world No 1 Japan, but in the afternoon we had
our confidence boosted when we had an easy
win against Mexico, 17 - 5.
Tuesday July 10: On day 3 were were up against
Colombia and Canada. I said earlier that every
team at this tournament had good fair play and
sportsmanship, but Colombia was an exception,
and the result of this was a bitterly disappointing loss, 17-5. In the afternoon we lost to
Canada 17-1, but despite the score it was a great
game. We were all in awe at how good they were
as a team and I personally really aspire to play
at that level some day.
Wednesday July 11: Day 4 brought us another
loss, this time against the USA, 17-3. As with
the Canada game, it was a well-spirited game
and we were pleased with how we performed
against one of the top teams of the tournament.
Our afternoon game against Germany was the
game we had been looking forward to all week!
We were lucky enough to play this game in the
stadium and it was being filmed and streamed
live online. Many of our friends and family back
at home were watching, including a packed
bar in Wellington and a viewing in one of the
lecture theatres at Massey Palmerston North.
We played the best we have ever played together
as a team and won 17-15, with me throwing the
winning point! Everyone in the team played out
of their skins and I know we all have very fond
memories of this game.
Thursday July 12: Fatigue really set in at this
point, both mentally and physically. Playing
two games a day was okay for the first few days
but even the fittest members of the team were
having trouble by now. The morning game was
a devastating loss to Finland, 12-11. We had to
play in gale-force winds, the worst I have ever
played in, and you can imagine what it’s like
trying to throw a frisbee into the wind! Finland
scored one more upwind point than us which
won the game for them. We lost our afternoon
game against Australia, but since we had
already played them in Sydney in the lead-up
to the tournament, we had expected this result.
Despite the trans-Tasman rivalry, everyone in
the Australian team is really friendly and we
always enjoy playing them.
Friday July 13: The draw worked out that we
had to play Australia and Great Britain again in
placing games for 5th to 8th place. Both these
teams had beaten us previously so ultimately we
came 8th in the tournament. We were all stoked
with this result given how small the sport is in
New Zealand, and how big it is in the some of
the other countries.
A special thanks goes to the Fitzherbert Lions
Club and the Manawatu Ultimate Association
for helping me with funding towards this trip.
Bring on the next world championships in four
years’ time!
Students interested in playing Ultimate Frisbee on campus
can contact:
Manawatu: Manawatu Ultimate Association: www.musa.org.nz
or head to the Massey University Club Page, MUCOUS.
Albany: Massey University Flying Frisbees (M.U.F.F),
masseyfrisbee@gmail.com
Wellington: Anna Hobman, clubs@mawsa.org.nz
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03
COLUMNS
DOCUMENTARIES THAT CHANGED THE WORLD
FROTHING AT THE MOUTH
BEER GUY
As our regular beer columnist
is away this month, this month
Simon Cooke from the Massey
Brewing Society takes us
through how you can brew
your own beer from home.
Beer has been brewed domestically
for thousands of years, slipping
through the grips of prohibition
and regulation to where it is today.
It is also easy to do and cheaper
than buying a slab of fizzy-yellowwater. Shake off any horrible
encounters you’ve had with Uncle
Steve’s gnarly rocket-fuel, you can
brew great tasting beer in your flat,
for as little as 50 cents a bottle.
There are a few pieces of equipment
you’ll need to get started. A
30-litre barrel, a thermometer, a
hydrometer to measure the alcohol
content, a plastic spoon, an airlock
to allow CO2 to escape without
letting germs in, and a bottling
tube. You can get all this gear in a
tidy wee package called the Copper
Tun Starter Brewery, from The
Brew House, or you can join the
Massey University Brewing Society
and hire it for free.
With your equipment ready to go,
you’re going to need some ingredients. Beer is brewed commercially with malt, hops, yeast and
water. The living yeast cells eat up
all the sugar extracted from the
malts, and turn this into alcohol
and CO2. The hops add flavour and
preserving qualities. All the hard
stuff has been taken out thanks to
do-it-yourself home brew beer kits,
with all the flavour of your desired
beer style condensed down into
an extract syrup in a can. There
are many different brands and
beer styles to choose from, but I
find ‘Mangrove Jack’s’ gives me
the tastiest brew. Now, let’s get
brewing.
1. Sterilize your barrel and
equipment, 2. Add 2L boiling
water to your barrel, 3. Add 1kg
of dextrose sugar, and your can of
malt extract and stir. 4. Top up with
tap water up to 23L, and record
a reading on your hydrometer. 5.
Sprinkle the yeast over the surface
of the brew. 6. Screw on the lid, fill
the airlock with water and fit it to
the lid.
Leave your brew somewhere nice
and warm (18 – 24°C) to ferment
for 7 days. You’ll know it’s finished
fermenting when the airlock stops
bubbling and your hydrometer is
reading around 1.008. Then you
can bottle your brew in plastic or
glass bottles with some carbonation drops and in two week’s time
you’d better throw a party because
your beer will be fizzy and ready to
drink!
As you can see, brewing beer at
home really is a piece of cake and
the sooner you give it a go, the
sooner you can be impressing your
flatmates with cold pints of your
very own houseale.
For more information, check out
the following resources:
FILM BUFFED
Paul Berrington seems to
know everything in the world
about film, and wants you to
as well
Join the Massey University
Brewing Society. They run
on-campus brewing tutorials,
and offer free equipment hire to
members.
Facebook.com/MasseyBrewSoc
Like many other journalistic fields,
the documentary film genre has
the ability to expose corruption
or bring awareness to issues that
would otherwise be swept under
the carpet.
The West Memphis Three are now
common knowledge, partly due
to the interest of Peter Jackson,
but mostly due to the Paradise
Lost series. Beginning in 1996,
directors Joe Berlinger and Bruce
Sinofsky began to uncover inconsistencies and a coerced confession
in the case against three teenagers
accused of the gruesome murder of
three young men. The filmmakers
interview police, and locals
exposing the deeply suspicious
nature of small-town Arkansas
and, over a period 15 years, help
bring awareness to the innocent
men’s cause. Three feature-length
documentaries later, the West
Memphis Three were released
after 20 years inside a maximum
security prison.
Perhaps the finest documentarian
of the modern era, Errol Morris,
came to prominence with another
film The Thin Blue Line that
helped free a wrongly convicted
man. Morris had already gained
plaudits for two independently
produced films, Vernon, Florida
and Gates of Heaven, yet moved
into investigative mode for this
superb and haunting film. After
the 1976 murder of a Dallas police
officer, detectives hungry for
prosecution follow a lead given
to them by a confessor to the
crime. Arrested and sentenced
to death, Randall Dale Adams is
a local hood, stupid enough to be
framed for the crime and without
a sole willing to help him. Morris
creates a spellbinding solving of
the puzzle, creating a mystery that
clicks like Hitchcock, and weaves
re-enactment between interviews
and the increasing instability of
the case. Adams served 12 years in
jail until the evidence uncovered
by The Thin Blue Line exposed the
corrupt police case against him.
Morgan Spurlock and Michael
Moore have one thing in common,
they like to be the star of the show,
while many consider their brand
of documentary-making flawed
because of this, they do get results.
Spurlock indulges in a 30-day
binge on McDonald’s in Super Size
Me, gaining weight, losing sexual
function, and generally becoming
exactly what you’d expect after
upsized Big Mac combos. As
well as bringing awareness to
the problem of obesity. Spurlock
brought about the Healthy Choices
menu. Maybe he should have just
gone somewhere else. Moore’s film
covers the Columbine shootings
in his imitable style, drawing
black humour from the tragedy
he clearly sees as avoidable. In
his protest of the USA’s liberal
gun laws he managed to change
mega-retailer K Mart’s own policy
towards selling ammunition. Given
the recent Colorado shootings it
seems a cause that could be further
documented.
HIS WEINER’S A PEANUT!
ASK A GURU
Similar to the back of the bus,
this is where all the juicy shit is.
Each month we will answer
your questions via.
Formspring.me/massiveguruz 58
Q: I ventured into town looking for
a boy to satisfy my sexual needs,
not wanting anything serious.
However, I’ve been meeting up
with this boy sober and having sex
with him. I kind of like him, and I
think he likes me, but I have one
problem: he has a peanut dick, and
because of that I just don’t climax.
Help me Guru, what do I do?
A: Firstly, thank you for your
question. I want to stress to all the
readers of the Guru column that
each question we receive is real,
and not made up by MASSIVE
magazine or Guru. These are
real-life situations. Now to the
question at hand.
You went wrong after the first time
you had sex with him. You should
have noticed at that stage that he
had a small penis and it just wasn’t
satisfying you, so you never should
have pursued. During this answer I
will give you tips on how to climax
without making your boy feel like
lesser of a man.
However, we must first state that it
is not your male friend’s fault that
he has a small penis. The average
penis size according to the Google
machine is 14cm (5 ½ inches), so if
you are that or above then you are
completely normal. Another quick
fact about penises and vaginas
is that the vagina is able to be
successfully stimulated with only
four inches of penetration, as long
as other parts of the vagina are
stimulated. And this is what you
and your boy can work with.
The vagina is extremely sensitive,
and if touched, licked, or prodded
properly, a girl should be able to
climax without penetration at all.
You need to teach your boy where
to touch you. You know what feels
good for you, so guide him and
teach him what you know. He’d
be more than happy to make you
happy because males enjoy seeing
their female counterpart’s pleasure
face.
As with the penis, it’s not how big
it is, but how you use it. Have sex
in specific positions where you
can actually feel it. So this means
avoid doggy style or you sitting on
top. Stick to the simple missionary
position and try standing positions
or using objects as leverage
so maximum insertion can be
achieved. While this happens,
stimulate sensitive parts of
yourself, or get him to do it. Then
it’s a win-win for you both.
If all else fails, and you still can’t
achieve climax, you might have to
let the poor guy go. Remember,
boys are extremely sensitive when
it comes to penis size, so don’t tell
him it was because of his small
penis, and make up some other
lame excuse. Or maybe, get over
it – it’s not what is on the outside
but what’s on the inside that truly
counts.
Claydan Krivan,
MASSIVE’s in-house Guru
La Macchina?
La Marzocco
Coffee drinkers who love good coffee also
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Wanting more of a Guru fix?
Questions are answered weekly
and will be posted to MASSIVE
magazine’s Facebook page:
facebook.com/MASSIVE.magazine
Brewing at Tussock and Museum Cafés
59
REVIEWS
FILM
2011
Directed by Drew Goddard
Staring
Chris Hemsworth, Kristen
Connolly, Richard Jenkins, Bradley
Whitford, Anna Hutchinson
FILM
2012
Directed by Christopher Nolan
Staring
Christian Bale, Thomas Hardy,
Michael Caine, Joseph GordonLevitt, Anne Hathaway, Gary
Oldman, Marion Cotillard, Morgan
Freeman,
60
THE CABIN IN THE WOODS
SUPERBROTHERS: SWORD AND SWORCERY EP
Paul Berrington
Callum O’neal
On the surface so much seems
familiar about The Cabin in the
Woods that it might be a little
redundant. The idea of five
‘twentysomethings’ heading towards a sinister fate is nothing new,
yet that is where the film delivers the
most, subverting the horror genre
into a new form, creating a hybrid
that is gloriously entertaining and
looking destined to become a classic
in its own right.
The story follows Dana (Connolly)
as she and four friends head out to
the woods for a relaxing weekend
away. The cabin has recently been
purchased by Curt’s (Hemsworth)
cousin, and upon arrival the friends
discover that it is far from the dream
home. Soon mayhem arises and
they must battle for their survival
against an unstoppable force.
Parallel to this is the apocalyptic
tale of a government organisation
trying to stop the end of the world
through two men, Hadley (Jenkins)
and Sitterson (Whitford), which
also relates to the cabin in question.
As the two strains align themselves
in an ingenious and witty way, we
are witness to enough twists and
turns for several films.
Joss Whedon’s (Buffy, Firefly, The
Avengers) precise dialogue makes
the script a pleasure, with his
conversations between the cynical
Hadley and Sitterson particularly
rewarding. He creates humor,
with apparent ease and frequent
momentum. Co-writer and director
Drew Goddard (Cloverfield) delivers
the action scenes with surprising
skill, never substituting satire for
thrills. Both men seem perfect
for the project, being schooled in
horror, and providing loving parody
throughout the creative process,
not just poking fun at cliché for the
sake of it. This allows The Cabin in
the Woods to function on two levels,
firstly as rollicking entertainment
for any filmgoer, and secondly as
a subversive examination of the
horror genre for fans. Technically
the film is also a bold statement,
with set design and CGI never
contrived, and a bevy of freaks and
monsters to be amazed by.
While heavily borrowing from
Friday the 13th, Evil Dead, the
Matrix, and Clive Barker and
many others. Each element
is
treated to its own reinvention, or
re-examination, and it is this clever
analysis of horror convention that
creates a film of sheer thrills and
entertainment. What is clear is
that in subverting the very genre in
which it exists, this is a film that will
now sit easily alongside the classic
influences it wears so happily on its
sleeve. Yes, it really is that good.
GAME
2011
Platform
PC
Art, it’s a subjective thing. Whether
a painting is a masterpiece or just
some colour on canvas is entirely
up to debate. As is whether video
games can ever be considered art?
Superbrothers:
Sword
and
Sworcery EP is art, plain and
simple. It’s stunning, it’s gorgeous,
it’s moving, it gets down to the
bottom of your heart and invokes
the deepest levels of emotion.
Happiness, sadness, loneliness,
fear, these are the feelings that have
stuck with me after the completion
of the Scythian’s woeful errand.
And what an errand it was. Sword
and Sworcery doesn’t really
explain much. You’re a Scythian,
you’re on a quest of some kind, you
wake up in a forest and are pretty
much left to figure out the rest by
yourself. The game presents its
story through messages that are
all less than 140 characters. It’s all
very self-aware, quite humorous
stuff and it’s what sets the tone of
the game, lighthearted, but with
serious undertones. To say more
would spoil the journey.
The art design of this game is simply
gorgeous It’s an eye-popping, pixel
art tribute to adventure gaming
greats like Kings Quest, while at
the same time maintaining its own
totally stunning style.
The sound is equally as impressive.
From the subtle rustling of bushes
to the slashing of the sword, everything just sounds simply fantastic.
The soundtrack was done by Jim
Guthrie and it is breathtaking.
As I stood on the precipice of
that cliff admiring the beauty in
everything around me, I thought
to myself “If this isn’t art, I really
don’t know what is.”
Unfortunately it sort of falls away
on the gameplay side. The game
took me four hours to finish and
that’s with me meticulously going
through everything. What is there
is very simple, there are some light
puzzles and some rhythm-based
combat scenarios reminiscent
of Punch Out for the NES. The
gameplay doesn’t really need to be
all that engaging anyway, it serves
simply as a delivery mechanism
for the sheer emotional journey
that the game is. Nor is the length
anything to be phased by. If it were
any longer the game would begin to
grow tiring and at a price of a mere
$7.99 US (roughly $10 NZ) you can
hardly go wrong.
It’s not a game for everybody,
I’m not really sure it’s enough of
a game to even be called a game.
But one thing I can tell you is that
it’s a simply brilliant thrill-ride of
emotions that stay with you long
after you’ve gotten out of the ride.
THE DARK KNIGHT RISES
LAWRENCE ARABIA - THE SPARROW
Paul Berrington
Roy McGrath
Not quite reaching the status
of masterpiece, Nolan’s final
Batman film delivers Hollywood
entertainment in a stylish and
spectacular way, filling the screen
and plot with a multitude of interrelated characters and superior set
design and effects.
Eight years on from The Dark
Knight, Gotham, through the
implementation of the Harvey
Dent reform bill, has seemingly
gotten rid of organised crime,
meaning there is no need for the
masked crusader, who has become
a reclusive Howard Hugheslike figure. Yet evil lurks in the
figurehead of Bane (Hardy) and his
group of financial backers. Upon
this premise is layered a typically
complex plot from Nolan and his
screenwriting brother, Jonathon,
leading to the need for Batman to
rise to Gotham’s help once again.
Further plot strands involving
Catwoman (Hathaway) and blue
collar cop John Blake (GordonLevitt) make this a film that keeps
you guessing until the very end.
Bale once again plays an effective
Bruce Wayne/Batman, believable
even in the most comically intense
scenes, yet vulnerable enough to
portray Wayne’s haunted and sociopathic nature unlike any before.
Hardy is also superb as the lead
villan, Bane. His calmness before
and during violent acts creates a
seemingly unbeatable opponent.
The fight scenes between the two
are brutally effective. Freeman as
Lucius Fox, Caine’s perfect Alfred,
and an impeccable Cotillard, add
the weight needed to maintain the
serious tone of the film.
As a spectacle the film impresses in
many ways. Sure there are gadgets
and such, yet it is some of the
city scenes that appeal the most .
Massed fighting on city streets has
never looked this good before, and
the design of Gotham under siege
is detailed and realistic. The film
is epic in every sense of the word,
featuring many settings and huge
effects. Filmed in IMAX, every
single shot is loaded with as much
detail as possible.
Perhaps the only weakness are
moments of illogical silliness.
Despite this, The Dark Knight
Rises functions as superior blockbuster entertainment. In a year
where Hollywood epics have
become contrived and removed
from pure cinema, this film stands
as a suitably engrossing end to an
outstanding trilogy. Fans have
every right to be excited about
what is easily the best thrill ride of
2012 so far, and stands as a highly
impressive piece of filmmaking.
ALBUM
2012
Label
Bella Union
The Sparrow is the third record
by New Zealand artist James
Milne aka Lawrence Arabia. The
Sparrow is a thoughtful and clever
example of meaningful pop music.
Milne combines piano, a variety of
strings, some off-beat percussion
and at times lurking bass-lines to
produce an album that is quickly
rewarding on some songs and a
little more slow-burning on others.
The record is put together in a
narrative structure, telling an
over-arching story of a protagonist’s journey into the big bad
world in search of success and the
struggles/adventures he has when
it doesn’t materialize instantly.
The story starts with the song
Travelling Shoes, a sickly-sweet
and upbeat number that sees Milne
mix together folky strings with
an almost doo-wop rhythm and
too-pretty-to-be-sung-by-a-boy
vocals; the resulting song works
nicely as an opening to the record
and a standalone pop song.
From here, Milne starts to peel
the wool away from the optimistic
traveler’s eyes as he starts to
explore the idea of failure. What’s
intriguing about this is the way
Milne manages to tackle the
subject in a way that remains lighthearted and almost comical. In The
03, Milne describes a case of tallpoppy syndrome as the Travelling
Shoes have come home, “with
my tail between my legs”. The
broken beats and plucked strings
at the beginning of this song
give way to some Lennon-esque
strumming and swooning that
evokes memories of Beatles songs
like Because and A Day in the Life.
This is a lovely track that deals with
failure in a philosophical way.
Milne shows his musical evolution
from catchier-than-a-cold pop
songs like Auckland CBD and
Apple Pie Bed in tracks like Early
Kneecappings. Here, we see/hear
a richer and more filled-out sound
combined with lyrics that are more
sinister and more daring. This song
is, if not the best on the record, the
most particular to the record. It
gives a real sense of where Milne is
at now and resists the urge to revisit
the sweeter pop landscape that he
has come from. In tracks like The
Bisexual, you can see the sense of
humor in Milne is still alive and
we are reminded why Taika Waititi
asked him to compose music for
Eagle Vs Shark.
The Sparrow is a beautiful record
which manages to subtly remind
the listener that it was made in
New Zealand without making you
cringe. It acknowledges Milne’s
past and hints at an exciting future.
61
COMIC
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