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Newspaper of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Trenton, N.J. W e d d i n g G u i d e April 26, 2012 ‘What God Has Joined…’ i From This Day Forward Contrary to the prevailing culture, preparing for a wedding, and a marriage, should be an act of faith | P W-2 n s i d Sacredness of Marriage The biblical vision of marriage is one of partnership, communion and a metaphor for God’s love of his people | P W-3 e Step by Step For those entering into marriage, the journey of a lifetime begins with one step… preparation | P W-10 W-2 | April 26, 2012 Wedding Guide ‘From this day forward…’ By Mary Morrell Managing Editor A number of years ago “The Wedding Planner” came to the screen. Reviews of the movie were as entertaining as the film, but one of them stood out as much as a cultural commentary as a movie review. A.O. Scott of the New York Times wrote, “Say what you will about the institution of marriage, but without it the possibilities of romantic comedy would be drastically impoverished. Not only is the fantasy of everlasting love capable of melting the most cynical heart, but weddings, with their ridiculous formal wear, pretentious catered food, free liquor and cheap sentiment, also overflow with potential for comic disaster.” Are you planning to be married? The Monitor Wedding Miracle – This 16th century painting of the Marriage Feast at Cana attributed to Hieronymus Bosch, depicts the first miracle of Christ. In an address to families, Pope John Paul II said of this event, “The wedding banquet at Cana leads us to think about marriage, whose mystery includes the presence of Christ. May it not be legitimate to see the presence of the Son of God at that wedding feast as an indication that marriage should be an effective sign of his presence?” Second World Meeting For Families, October 1997 A Countercultural View “How we, as Catholics, look at marriage and how society looks at marriage,” said Msgr. Sam Sirianni, diocesan director of the Office of Worship, “are completely different. For us, when two baptized persons marry each other, that marriage is a sacrament” … an encounter with Christ that strengthens the couple in keeping their sacred promises to each other. “For two people willingly giving consent to be husband and wife, the planning of a wedding is “For two people not just a social event, it is an act of faith,” stressed Msgr. willingly giving consent Sirianni. It is, as the Catholic faith to be husband and teaches, the grace of God through Christ that makes wife, the planning everlasting love not only a but a probability of a wedding is not just possibility, for those who enter freely into a marital relationship aware a social event, it is of what lies ahead, not only at the reception, but around the an act of faith.” kitchen table, in the principal’s office, in the hospital and in the bedroom. Both Blessed John Paul II, especially in his profound work, “Theology of the Body,” and Pope Benedict XVI have written and taught on the pressing need for adequate formation of couples for marriage, in particularly in the area of human sexuality. During their recent Ad Limina visits, Pope Benedict addressed the U.S. bishops on the matter of marriage preparation, which, he said, has “failed at times to communicate the rich heritage of Catholic teaching on marriage as a natural institution elevated by Christ to the dignity of a sacrament, the vocation of Christian spouses in society and in the Church, and the practice of marital chastity. “Young people need to encounter the Church’s teaching in its integrity, challenging and countercultural as that teaching may be; more importantly, they need to see it embodied by faithful married couples who bear convincing witness to its truth … In a society which increasingly tends to misunderstand and even ridicule this essential dimension of Christian teaching, young people need to be reassured that if we let Christ into our lives, we lose nothing, absolutely nothing, of what makes life free, beautiful and great.” Preparation for Life “I realize that many couples do not think about the religious aspect of marriage when they are in love,” acknowledged Msgr. Sirianni, who also serves as pastor in St. Robert Bellarmine Parish, Freehold. “A major influence in this development has been how our society has turned getting married into a big business. The popular television programs that emphasize the planning for the reception and the hunt for the dress have trumped the preparation for the religious ceremony and the lifelong commitment that this sacrament entails.” As a pastor who makes it a point to teach and inform his parishioners on the elements of faith that affect them and their families, Msgr. Sirianni shared with his congregation that he was “amazed by the number of couples who make all their arrangements for the wedding – the date, the time and the reception – and then call the parish to arrange a meeting with the priest and then schedule the church,” only to be upset with the parish when their pre-arranged details cannot be accommodated. This order of preparation reflects the state of the couple’s understanding of their Catholic faith and their relationship to the Church, said Msgr. Sirianni, noting also the powerful evangelizing potential of a wedding. “We have to recognize it is our obligation, as clergy, to work with couples, to sit with them and answer questions honestly See Marriage | P W-11 What We Believe ‘Fairest Love’ “All that a husband and a wife promise to each other—to be ‘true in good times and in bad, and to love and honour each other all the days of their life’—is possible only when ‘fairest love’ is present. Man today cannot learn this from what modern mass culture has to say. ‘Fairest love’ is learned above all in prayer. Prayer, in fact, always brings with it, to use an expression of St. Paul, a type of interior hiddenness with Christ in God; ‘your life is hid with Christ in God’ (Col 3:3). Only in this hiddenness do we see the workings of the Holy Spirit, the source of ‘fairest love.’ He has poured forth this love not only in the hearts of Mary and Joseph but also in the hearts of all married couples who are open to hearing the word of God and keeping it (cf. Lk 8:15). The future of each family unit depends upon this ‘fairest love’: the mutual love of husband and wife, of parents and children, a love embracing all generations. Love is the true source of the unity and strength of the family.” - Pope John Paul II, Letter to Families, 1994 www.Trenton M onitor. com Wedding Guide April 26, 2012 | W-3 Embracing the biblical view of marriage of partnership and communion in which the stewardship of the earth and the image of God are shared by the man and woman. With the fall of Adam and Eve, marriage You’re standing in a neighbor’s backyard is beset by a competitive spirit and a tendenat a cookout when a non-Christian friend cy to discord and domination, a departure who knows of your interest in Scripture from God’s initial plan. asks, “What’s the Bible say about marriage?” “Beulah,” a common Hebrew word for One obvious response might be a list “wife” has a root meaning of “owned,” and of the passages in which marriage is men“Baal,” (“husband”) also tioned. But such a compremeans “owner.” The sense hensive list, by itself, might “Nowhere is there a of marriage understood as a be more confusing than commercial relailluminating. suggestion that marriage one-sided, tionship is transformed over The biblical theology of marriage is complex and is an innovation. It’s an the centuries to a vision of mutuality and self-donation in some ways challenging, integral part of human (see, for example, Chapter more the subject of a semes7 of the First Letter to the ter-long course than a twosociety.” Corinthians). minute response in casual Third, the consistent use conversation. of marriage as a metaphor One practical way to help for the relationship between your inquisitive friend get an God and his people suggests a vision that overview of the Bible’s “take” on marriage is understands marriage not as a matter of to note four points. dominance or utility but of love. First, the Bible assumes that marriage Prophets speak of God as married to is a given of human social and familial life. Israel precisely because marriage communiChallenging elements of the biblical view, cates the intimacy to which God calls us and such as its occasional acceptance of pothe intensity of his love. lygamy, reflect the influence of local cultural When the Letter to the Ephesians says norms. Nowhere is there a suggestion that that Christ is the bridegroom of his beloved, marriage is an innovation. It’s an integral the Church (see Eph 5:22-32), it presupposes part of human society. marriage as a relationship of generosity and Second, there is a perceptible arc in the reconciliation, of deep, transforming love. biblical view of marriage. The creation In using marriage as a central image for stories of Genesis point to an original vision By Dan Luby Catholic News Service Marriage as Sacred – Deacon John Ford presides at a wedding. “In using marriage as a central image for the love between God and his people, the Bible elevates marriage to an exalted status,” suggests Dan Luby. CNS photo/Gregory A. Shemitz, Long Island Catholic the love between God and his people, the Bible elevates marriage to an exalted status. And last, anything and everything specific the Bible has to say about marriage has to be understood in the overarching context of the vision and person of Jesus. All human relationships should reflect the kingdom of God, that realm of joy and healing and forgiveness and communion that illuminates Jesus’ preaching and for the sake of which he offers his sacrificial love. Luby is Tschoepe Chair of Homiletics at the School of Ministry, University of Dallas, Irving, Texas. Couples say commitment and caring are keys to lasting marriages By Louise McNulty Catholic News Service Frank and Jennifer Ricard, married 17 years, and Rick and Kelly Turner, wed for 24, are friends and fellow parishioners at St. Mary Church in Hudson, Ohio. They say their marriages are healthy and lasting due to love, still having fun together, sharing the same interests, belief in keeping the vows they made to each other and the support of likeminded friends. Both couples feel their church community has nurtured and supported their marriages. The Ricards moved from one suburb to another to be within the parish boundaries – their choice supported by the fact that it also put Frank closer to work. “Of course the most important thing (that has kept our marriage strong),” said Frank Ricard, “is the vow we made to each other. Not every day is easy – you don’t feel madly in love every day – but you work through problems because you’re committed. You work on mending things and finding solutions because you have no other option in a lifetime commitment.” Frank Ricard also believes children – they have six – are a stabilizing factor. “After you have children and find out how dependent they are on you, you realize marriage is not just about how I feel today, but about your responsibility,” he said. Ricard’s wife Jennifer said believing in the same things helps the marriage. “Because we believe in staying together, we prioritize (our marriage) in our life. If things are not in a good place, we stop and get it there,” she said. “Children are one of the things that keep our marriage together, but on the other hand parenting is one of the hardest parts of marriage,” she said about their large family. For example, each parent may have a different solution to a problem. “It’s a matter of getting to the point where we recognize it doesn’t have to be that one of us is right and the other wrong but that we recognize that our different (perspectives) are complementary and support the best solution.” The Ricards’ friends, the Turners, also have found children a binding force in marriage. One of their hardest challenges came seven years ago when they lost their sixth child, who was five months old. “Normally, in tough situations in a marriage, one person is stressed and the other is the rock,” said Kelly. “But with the loss of a child both people are stressed.” What kept the couple together? “First, we already had a good marriage and strong faith, but we slowed down on activities and spent more time together.” That included Rick working from home for several years following the tragedy. The efforts of the individuals, their belief in marriage as a lifetime commitment and becoming involved in a supportive church community have helped both couples succeed. Rick Turner said, “We believe in the commitment we made the day we got married – that two shall become one. That is important and what keeps us together. (I just) don’t feel whole when we’re not together.” Frank Ricard, who appreciates the support of like-minded families in the couple’s social circle, confesses, “We tend to hang out with families with larger numbers of kids. People with less kids tend to avoid us.” He said, “We tend to share our trials and tribulations (with other couples with large families) and become a supportive group.” Ricard believes a couple’s faith plays a key role in a lasting marriage. “In a selfish society, we have to learn from the Gospel that we must die to ourselves and make sacrifices,” he said. McNulty is a freelance writer in Akron, Ohio. W-4 | April 26, 2012 Wedding Guide The Monitor Following is a listing of wedding services Reception Facilities Adelphia’s Grand Ballroom 1750 Clements-Bridge Rd. Deptford, NJ 08096 856-845-8200 www.adelphiarestaurant.com Aloft Mount Laurel 558 Fellowship Road Mount Laurel, NJ 08054 856-234-1880 www.aloftmountlaurel.com American Hotel 18-20 East Main Street Freehold, NJ 07728 732-431-3220 www.americanhotelnj.com Atlantis Ballroom at the Holiday Inn of Toms River (Hotels Unlimited) 290 Route 37 East Toms River, NJ 08753 732-244-4000 www.atlantisballroom.com Auletto Caterers 1849 Cooper St. Almonisson, NJ 08096 856-227-3800 www.auletto.com Christopher’s Kitchen 165 Amboy Road - Suite 504 Morganville, NJ 07751 732-491-3399 www.christopherskitchen.com Beau Steak & Seafood Courtyard on Main Branches Catering Crystal Ballroom at the Radisson Hotel of Freehold (Hotels Unlimited) 128 Taunton Blvd Medford, NJ 08055 856-983-1999 123 Monmouth Road West Long Branch, NJ 07764 732-542-5050 www.branchesnj.com Channel Club Caterers 1 Channel Drive Monmouth Beach, NJ 07750 732-229-3131 www.channelclubnj.com Chauncey Conference Center & Laurie House 1 Chauncey Road Princeton, NJ 08541 609-921-3600 www.acc-chaunceyconferencecenter. com 30 East Main Street Freehold, NJ 07728 732-294-0424 www.courtyard1.com 50 Gibson Place Freehold, NJ 07728 732-780-3400 www.crystalballroomnj.com Eagle Ridge Golf Club 2 Augusta Blvd. Lakewood, NJ 08701 732-901-4900 www.eagleridgegolf.com Filomena 13 Cross Keys Road West Berlin, NJ 08091 856-753-3540 www.filomenasberlin.com Flanders Special Event & Catering Facility 11th & Boardwalk Ocean City, NJ 08226 609-398-9998 www.theflandershotel.com Grand Marquis Caterers 1550 Route 9 South Old Bridge, NJ 08857 732-679-5700 www.grandmarquiscaterers.com Great Bay Country Club 901 Mays Landing Road Somers Point, NJ 08244 609-927-5071 www.greatbay.com Hotel Unlimited 399 Monmouth St. East Windsor, NJ 08520 609-448-7000 x628 www.hotelsunlimited.com Lakeside Manor 410 Route 36 South Hazlet, NJ 07730 732-739-2700 www.thelakesidemanor.com Continued on W-5 Wedding Guide www.TrenTon M oniTor. coM Continued from W-4 Lakewood Country Club 145 Country Club Drive Lakewood, NJ 08701 732-363-8125 www.thelakewoodcountryclub.com La Riviera Lounge 113 Main Street Matawan, NJ 07747 732-566-8400 www.larivieraloungenj.com Lucien’s Manor 81 West White Horse Pike Berlin, NJ 08009 856-768-9444 www.luciensmanor.com Maggiano’s 2000 Route 38 - Suite 1180 Cherry Hill, NJ 08002 856-792-4470 www.maggianos.com Marco’s Banquets (Indian Springs Country Club) 115 South Elmwood Road Marlton, NJ 08053 856-596-1106 www.marcosbanquet.com Merri-Makers Caterers The PNC Reception Center Exit #116 NJ Parkway North Holmdel, NJ 07733 732-264-3355 www.merrimakers.com Merri-Makers Caterers The Water’s Edge 1465 Ocean Avenue Sea Bright, NJ 07760 732-842-1714 www.merrimakers.com Moorestown Community House Shadowbrook / The Zweben Family Route 35, P.O. Box 97 Shrewsbury, NJ 732-747-0200 www.shadowbrook.com Sheraton Eatontown Hotel Industrial Way Eatontown, NJ 07724 732-542-6500 www.sheratoneatontown.com South Gate Manor 260 South St. Freehold, NJ 07728 732-431-1500 www.southgatemanornj.com Spring Lake Manor 415 Route 71 Spring Lake Heights, NJ 732-449-6630 www.weddingreceptionnj.com Sterling Ballroom at the Doubletree Hotel of Tinton Falls 700 Hope Road Tinton Falls, NJ 07724 732-544-9300 x708 www.sterlingballroomevents.com Sterling Gardens 227 Freneau Avenue (Rt. 79) Matawan, NJ 07747 732-583-9200 www.sterlinggardensnj.com The Atlantis Ballroom at the Holiday Inn of Toms River 16 East Main Street Moorestown, NJ 08057 856-235-0326 www.thecommunityhouse.com 290 Route 37 Toms River, NJ 08753 732-244-4000 x505 www.hiweddingsnj.com Ocean Place The Avenue 1 Ocean Blvd. Long Branch, NJ 07740 732-571-5732 www.oceanplaceresort.com 23 Ocean Avenue Long Branch, NJ 07740 888-427-4339 www.leclubavenue.com Park 33 The Bradford Estate 618 Park Avenue Freehold, NJ 07728 732-761-1300 www.park33.com 1910 Marne Highway Hainesport, NJ 609-261-8778 www.thebradfordestate.com Piazza di Roma The Breakers Hotel 1178 Route 34 South Aberdeen, NJ 07747 732-583-3565 www.piazzadiroma.com 1507 Ocean Avenue Spring Lake, NJ 07762 732-449-7700 www.breakershotel.com Running Deer Golf Club The Buttonwood Manor 1111 Parvin Mill Road Pittsgrove, NJ 08318 856-358-2000 www.runningdeergolfclub.com 845 Route 34 North Matawan, NJ 07747 732-566-6220 www.thebuttonwoodmanor.com The Castle Yacht Club 63 Saint Mihiel Drive Delran, NJ 08075 856-824-0444 www.theyachtclubcaterers.com Doubletree Mt. Laurel by Hilton 515 Fellowship Rd. Mt. Laurel, NJ 08054 856-778-8999 www.doubletree1.hilton.com The Mansion Main St. Voorhees, NJ 08043 856-751-1717 www.mansiononmainstreet.com The Merion 1301 Route 130 South Cinnaminson, NJ 08077 856-829-2111 www.themerion.com The Mill at Spring Lake 101 Old Mill Road Spring Lake Heights, NJ 07762 732-449-1800 www.themillnj.com A pril 26, 2012 | W-5 The Reception Center at St. Clement 172 Freneau Avenue Matawan, NJ 07747 732-591-8180 www.mayercatering.com The St. John Neumann Conference & Banquet Center 146 Metlars Lane Piscataway, NJ 08854 732-562-2411 www.diometuchen.org The Sunset Ballroom at Jack Baker’s 62 Broadway Point Pleasant Beach, NJ 08742 732-295-0350 www.thesunsetballroom.com The Ultimate Caterer 52C North Main Street Marlboro, NJ 732-577-0490 www.ultimatecaterer.com Continued on W-6 St. John Neumann THE CONFERENCE & BANQUET CENTER WEDDING RECEPTIONS • SPECIAL OCCASIONS CONFERENCES & MEETINGS 50 to 300 Guests • Buffets and Sit-Down Dinners available Conveniently located from Route 287, the NJ Turnpike, Parkway, Routes 1,18 & close to a large selection of accommodations 146 Metlars Lane, Piscataway, NJ For More Information 732.562.2411 e-mail: events@diometuchen.org diometuchen.org/banquets Wedding Guide W-6 | April 26, 2012 Woodlake Country Club Continued from W-5 The Versailles Ballroom at the Ramada Inn of Toms River (Hotels Unlimited) 2373 Route 9 Toms River, NJ 08755 732-905-2626 x154 www.versaillescaterers.com The Waterford Ballroom 110 First Avenue King of Prussia, PA 610-354-8220 www.the-waterford.com 25 New Hampshire Ave. Lakewood, NJ 08701 732-367-4500 www.woodlakecountryclub.com Entertainment Boardwalk Photo Booth Rentals 609-742-4110 www.boardwalkphotoboothrentals.com Dancing DJs Vanity Fare Caterers 1600 Route 70 East Lakewood, NJ 08701 732-364-6400 www.vanityfarenj.com 6843 Route 9 North Howell, NJ 07731 800-669-3123 www.dancingdjs.com Joey Arminio &The Family Windows on the Water Brick, NJ 732-836-9015 www.joeyarminio.com 931 Ocean Avenue Seabright, NJ 07760 732-842-8463 www.njwindowsonthewater.com NjDjs Windsor Ballroom at the Holiday Inn East Windsor 18 Hervey Street Staten Island, NY 10309 866-plat-wed www.platwed.com (Hotels Unlimited) 399 Monmouth Street Easr Windsor, NJ 609-443-8000 www.windsorballroom.com 732-722-5100 • www.njdjs.com Platimum Entertainment RKM Productions 732-492-0365 www.rkmentertainment.com 564 PALMER AVENUE MIDDLETOWN, NJ 07748 732-787-1410 WWW.ANASFLORISTANDGIFTS.COM Discover the perfect flowers for your picture–perfect wedding. Our hand–crafted arrangements make the entire day yours. Choose your romantic bouquets and boutonnieres as well as unforgettable altar décor and centerpieces. Imagine your Wedding Collection of Elegant White, Precious Pink, Stunning Peach and Pink, Enchanting Pastels, Engaging Purples, Alluring Autumn or Passionate Reds. The Monitor Untouchable Entertainment 165 Route 37 East - Suite B Toms River, NJ 08753 732-240-7300 www.djs4you.com Flowers Ana’s Floral Garden 564 Palmer Avenue Middletown, NJ 07748 732-787-1410 www.anasfloristandgifts.com Emerald Isle Flowers & Gifts 1022 Route34 South Matawan, NJ 07747 732-566-4090 www.emeraldisleflowersandgifts.com Especially For You Florist and Gift Shop 37 & 39 West Main St. Freehold, NJ 07728 732-431-2053 www.especiallyforyounj.com Flower Boutique 1211 Kings Highway North Cherry Hill, NJ 08034 856-427-4334 www.myflowerboutique.com Mueller’s Flowers & Gifts 245 Route 71 Manasquan, NJ 08736 732-223-1882 www.muellersflowers.net Skip’s Toms River Florist & Gifts 1187 Washington Street - Suite 1 Toms River, NJ 08753 732-270-5900 Dance Studios The Fred Astaire Dance Studio 46 Newman Springs Rd. Red Bank, NJ 07701 732-741-4188 www.fredastaireredbank.com Limousine Companies A-1 Limousine 2 Emmons Drive Princeton, NJ 08540 609-951-0070 www.a1limo.com Continued on W-7 0$&"/GR07& CAMP MEETING ASSOCIATION God’s Square Mile At The Jersey Shore t"USVF$ISJTUJBOTFBTJEFTFUUJOH tPSJTUJOFBFBDIFTBOEBPBSEwBML tWPOEFSGVMGBNJMZPSJFOUFEFOUFSUBJONFOUBOEBDUJWJUJFT July 7- Diana Krall, July 14-Frank Sinatra, Jr, July 21- Wynonna Judd, July 28- Michael W. Smith, Aug. 4- Golden Boys: Frankie Avalon, Fabian & Bobby Rydell, Aug. 11-Johnny Mathis, Aug. 18Niel Sedaka, Aug. 25-Bobby Vinton, Sept. 1- Doo Wop, Sept. St. Peter by the Sea Orchestra, Sept. 22-Veggie Tales: God Made You Special VJTJUPVSwFCTJUFfPSVQDPNJOHFWFOUTwww.oDFBOHSoWF.oSH Wedding Guide www.Trenton M onitor. com Continued from W-6 Ace Limousine 189 Drum Point Road Brick, NJ 08723 732-920-4899 A E & L Limousine Service Jackson, NJ 08527 732-367-3629 Albert’s Transportation 1126 Route 73 Mount Laurel, NJ 08054 856-222-9600 All Over Town Limousine 856-227-0018 Allaire Limousine Service Freehold, NJ 07728 732-431-1990 Allaire Limousine Service Manasquan, NJ 08736 732-528-7880 Allways Limousine Service 133 Brittany Drive Freehold, NJ 07728 732-431-3998 Americano Limousine Service 900 Dudley Avenue Cherry Hill, NJ 08002 856-663-8773 Anchor Limousine Service PO Box 986 Barnegat, NJ 08005 609-492-2287 Anthony’s Limousines 2311 Route 70 Cherry Hill, NJ 08002 856-662-5466 Apc Limousine 21 West Main Marlton, NJ 08053 856-596-9655 Bordentown Taxi & Limo 1077 Route 206 Bordentown, NJ 08505 609-291-9940 Carlin Limousine Service 2 Winter Lane Burlington, NJ 08016 609-747-1088 Chariot Limousine LLC 601 Prospect Lakewood, NJ 08701 732-363-2441 Class Act Limousine 407 Route 130 South Cinnaminson, NJ 08077 856-786-1001 Driven by Excellence 1 Ocean Blvd. Long Branch, NJ 07740 732-513-4330 www.jerseyshorelimos.com East Coast Limousine Services Brainerd Street Mount Holly, NJ 08060 609-267-0809 Exclusive Car & Limousine Service Toms River, NJ 732-864-9001 www.exclusivecarservice.com Executive Coach East 2514 Route 73 Cinnaminson, NJ 08077 856-662-5443 Fancy Limos 399 Route 9 North Freehold, NJ 07728 732-409-9961 www.fancylimos.com April 26, 2012 | W-7 Fancy Limousines of Cherry Hill Inc. 2442 Route 38 Cherry Hill, NJ 08002 856-667-5446 First Class Limousine 187 Route 9 South Englishtown, NJ 07726 732-972-3200 www.ridefirstclass.com Gateway Limousine Service Freehold, NJ 07728 732-780-0737 James Limousine Service 2050 Springdale Road Cherry Hill, NJ 08003 856-424-6655 Jersey Shore Limousine Manasquan, NJ 08736 732-528-0433 Leggs Limousine Medford, NJ 08055 609-654-9339 Continued on W-8 W-8 | April 26, 2012 Wedding Guide Continued from W-7 Leggs Limousine 68 Stacy Haines Rd. Mount Holly, NJ 08060 609-914-0790 The Monitor Rosel Limousine Superior Limousines Inc Ross Limousine Three Three London Taxi 16 Maplewood Lakewood, NJ 08701 800-991-2279 East Brunswick Avenue Freehold, NJ 07728 732-257-0233 Michael Romeo Creations 349 Route 9 South Manalapn, NJ 07726 732-617-7333 www.romeocreations.com Phantastic Images 400 Route 38 Maple Shade, NJ 08052 856-667-2706 Route 33 Neptune, NJ 732-922-2222 www.rosslimo.com 33 First Avenue Atlantic Highlands, NJ 07716 732-291-8000 Limousine of Luxury Royal Limousines 231 South Hope Chapel Rd. Jackson, NJ 08527 732-364-0640 Photography by Mike D Zark Limousine Picture Us Perfect Liberty Limousine 133 Gaither Drive Mount Laurel, NJ 08054 856-778-1818 Pampered Travels 15 Lowershore Road Banegat, NJ 08005 609-607-1280 Phl Limousine 101 Route 130 South Cinnaminson, NJ 08077 856-786-7151 Regal Limousine Service Route 206 Bordentown, NJ 08505 609-298-2425 Memorial Pkwy. (Rte. 36 South) & Central Ave. Atlantic Highlands, NJ 07716 732-291-7373 Santos VIP Limousine 1105 Route 1 South Avenel, NJ 07001 732-596-1100 www.santoslimousine.com Signature Limousine 732-669-7545 www.sls-limo.com Stretch One 647 North County Line Rd. Jackson, NJ 08527 732-928-6031 Tri-State Limousine Mount Laurel, NJ 08054 856-222-1060 Photographers Alliance Video Productions 609-268-7044 www.alliancevideousa.com B Style Photography Bridgewater, NJ 908-334-6600 www.bstyle-photography.com Dupree Studios 1 Bethany Rd.- Suite 15 Hazlet, NJ 732-264-8855 www.dupreestudios.com Harvey Video & Photography LLC Freehold, NJ 732-363-2442 www.harveyvideophoto.com Belford, NJ 732-241-6585 www.phantasticimages.com 609-280-8400 www.photographybymiked.com www.pictureusperfect.com Pittelli Photography 856-885-8527 www.pittelliphotography.com Stan the Fotoman Freehold, NJ 732-610-7300 www.stanthefotoman.com The Studio 8 West Main Street Freehold, NJ 732-431-2660 Timeless Studio of Photography Freehold, NJ 732-866-1709 www.timephoto.net Trenton Photographers 1207 South Broad Street Trenton, NJ 08650 609-394-3390 www.trentonphotogrephers.com Unlimited Exposures John Arcara Photography 285 Gordons Corner Road Manalapan, NJ 07726 732-617-1588 www.unlimitedexposures.com Karenscape Trade Shows 2 Broad St. - # 202 Red Bank, NJ 732-299-9537 Manalapan, NJ 917-734-1632 www.karenscape.com Korbman Fine Photographers Bridal Event by Bouche Productions 610-917-9300 www.bridalevent.com 22 Anderson Lane Robbinsville, NJ 609-208-0930 www.korbmanandcompany.com Bridal Showcase Mer-Made Photography Elegant Bridal Productions 856-265-5838 www.mer-madephotography.com 888-427-4339 www.elegantbridal.com Michael Dill Photography Planit Expo 172 Applegate Dr. Hamilton Square, NJ 08690 609-588-9502 www.michaeldillphotography.com 856-273-9499 www.bridalshowcases.com 1187 Washington St. - # 3 Toms River, NJ 08753 732-506-6800 x 11 www.planitexpo.com Continued on W-9 Wedding Guide www.Trenton M onitor. com Continued from W-8 Boutiques Party Planners 409 Crooks Ave. Clifton, NJ 07011 973-546-1503 www.bridaltradeshows.com Cinderella’s Bridals at the Marketplace Full Splendour Weddings SMI Bridal Expo Travel Cherry Travel Route 34 South & 2 MacArthur Drive Matawan, NJ 07747 732-583-2750 www.cherrytravel.com Rapka Travel, Inc 5211 Route 33 Wall Township, NJ 07727 732-938-5000 www.rapkatravel.com Videographers Command Performance Videography 856-783-7098 www.cpweddings.com Harvey Video & Photography 6843 Route 9 North Howell, NJ 07731 732-363-2442 443 L Route 34 North Matawan, NJ 07747 732-290-1045 www.cinderellabridals.com Hearts For You Pine Creek Plaza 415 Route 9 South Manalapan, NJ 07726 732-536-7808 www.heartsforyoubridal.com Marlene’s 710 Haddon Avenue Collingswood, NJ 08108 856-858-4777 www.marlenesdressshop.com One Special Evening 1846 Hooper Ave. Toms River, NJ 08753 732-255-4040 Verenique Plus Size Boutique 710 Haddon Avenue Collingswood, NJ 08108 www.vereniqueplussize.com 609-518-1259 www.eventmood.com Jersey Shore Wedding Professionals www.jswa.org Lasting Memories 856-404-3423 www.lastingmemoriesparty.com New Jersey Wedding 908-874-0417 www.njwedding.com Gift Store Ballyhugh 235 South White Horse Pike Audubon, NJ 856-546-0946 Many Blessings April 26, 2012 | W-9 Marlboro, NJ 07726 732-617-2168 www.diamondcastle.com Gary Michaels Fine Jewelry 55 Route 9 South Manalapan, NJ 07726 732-577-1030 www.garymichaelsfinejewelry.com Tuxedos Tuxedo Junction Rentals & Sales Town Hall Shops-Cedar Bridge & Brick Blvd. Brick, NJ 732-477-0222 www.tuxjunctionnj.com Bakery ChocaL8Kiss Voorhees Town Center Voorhees, NJ 8043 856-770-1177 285 Gordon’s Corner Rd. # 3 Manalapan, NJ 07726 888-986-2253 www.chocal8kiss.com Jewelry Normandie Bakery Marlboro Diamond Castle LLC. 167 Route 9 South 3049 Route 35 North Hazlet, NJ 732-264-1634 THE MONITOR SPECIAL Photography and Photo Favors Total value $2,344.00 Show Special $1895.00 plus Tax Savings of $449.00 We also specialize in Baptism, First Communion and Confirmation Photos STAN THE FOTOMAN FREEHOLD PHOTOGRAPHY 949 Adelphia Rd. (Rte. 524) Adelphia, NJ 07710 Office: 732-577-8879 Cell: 732-610-7300 Fax: 732-866-9987 E-mail: stan@stanthefotoman.com W-10 | April 26, 2012 Wedding Guide The Monitor Step By Step Marriage preparation is first step on journey of a lifetime Peg Hensler Special Contributor There is nothing more exciting in the lives of a young couple than the moment of their engagement. For couples wishing to marry in the Catholic Church, the first step after engagement is to set up a meeting at the wedding parish to discuss all the elements of preparing for sacramental marriage. For the typical engaged couple, it’s all about planning the wedding day – shopping for the gown, choosing a reception venue, picking out flowers, selecting a photographer – the list goes on and on. Yet for a Catholic couple, planning the wedding itself is just the tip of the iceberg, because it’s much more about readiness for lifelong marriage than it is about the wedding day. In fact, the Catholic Church teaches that a person begins preparing for marriage long before they fall in love with their future spouse. Remote preparation for sacramental marriage actually begins the day a person is born and enters a family, and, officially, when they are baptized into the Catholic faith. Parents who exhibit unconditional love for each other and their children offer the best example of the kind of self-giving love needed for successful, lifelong marriage. Here in the Diocese of Trenton, preparing engaged couples for sacramental marriage is one of our greatest priorities, just as it has been for the entire Catholic Church for the past forty years. To prepare couples adequately for their life together, the pastoral minister of the parish, normally a priest or deacon, works closely with each engaged couple through a series of meetings to discuss their hopes and dreams, assess their level of readiness for the sacrament, and provide appropriate teaching and pastoral care. A premarital inventory may be offered to enable the pastoral minister and couple to identify particular areas of strength in the relationship, and skills that need to be developed. “It’s much more about readiness for lifelong marriage than it is about the wedding day.” Each couple is also required to attend a formal marriage preparation class, either a parish Pre-Cana class, a diocesan Pre-Cana class (based on Pope John Paul II’s holistic vision of the human person in body, soul, and spirit, as presented in “Theology of the Body”) or a Catholic Engaged Encounter weekend. All couples are encouraged to take a class in Natural Family Planning. The final step in the preparation process is to plan a meaningful wedding liturgy that reflects the uniqueness of the couple’s relationship and the sacredness of their sacramental bond. The entire marriage preparation process is considered a moment of evangelization. For those of us who work in marriage ministry, it is a special privilege to witness the remarkable transformation that can happen when young couples fully embrace their faith and invite Jesus to walk with them throughout their marriage journey Hensler is diocesan Coordinator of Marriage Ministries and Natural Family Planning. For more information on marriage preparation visit www.dioceseoftrenton. org and follow Who We Are>Our Offices/ Ministries>Department of Youth, Marriage and Family Life>Marriage Matters, or call 609-403-7156. Kindness can carry a marriage through life’s journey By Mary Eileen Andreasen Catholic News Service Older couples must have a secret. Their marriages defy the odds and they are often examples of generosity and kindness for several generations. What do they know that we don’t? I watch older couples with fascination, hoping for insight. I need to learn from them. I’ve been married for more than 30 years and empty nesting is upon us. Kids have a way of distracting you from your marriage by their wild noisy chaos. These days, there’s no distraction. It’s just us. I’ve already vacuumed three empty bedrooms and shut the door. Our baby is graduating from high school this spring and the house is falling silent. How does a long marriage survive and improve with time? There must be a way to avoid that irritation when you anticipate the next sentence your spouse will say and know every maddening idiosyncrasy. I know a good marriage is the union of two good givers and forgivers, and, of course, I’ve learned that marriage is so much more than glamour and sexuality. The older couples I know have talked about the need to stay active, try new things and meet new people. They have not lost their zest for living and willingly embrace a quiet but meaningful life. A priest friend calls this “the courage to be boring.” But there’s something more. Lifetime of Respect – “In stable marriages, couples grow in kindness and respect through the passage of time,” states Mary Eileen Andreasen. CNS photo/Bob Roller As newlyweds, we had no idea what our struggles would be. We had no thought for the future even though everyone tried to warn us about the gloom and doom of “difficult times ahead.” We didn’t pay attention. Hard times hit soon enough and came with unrelenting wavelike fury. The unplanned pregnancies, the seriously ill child and the surgeries, the moves and the job changes overwhelmed us. There also was the moodiness and the restlessness we both fought. Over the past 30 years, we have buried our parents and some siblings, paid thousands in tuition and walked three of our five children down the aisle. Our life has unfolded day by day, side by side. We have felt the years zoom by like spectators at a NASCAR race. So far, we’ve survived. But after the years and tears of raising a pack of kids, something maturing is happening to us. We know so intimately about the life of the other that compassion and charity have taken deep, deep roots. Knowing the hardships and the triumphs my spouse has faced helps increase my respect for him. I have stood witness to the ups and downs of his life, as he has with mine. This doesn’t happen with all unions. Marriage can be a stormy sea, and often it’s not a faithful partnership. But for caring couples, I think this is the secret. In stable marriages, couples grow in kindness and respect through the passage of time. They desire the good of the other because they alone know the deepest secrets of their spouse. I love Thomas Merton’s description of the Christian life as the “school of charity.” It’s also a mantra for marriage. There’s a quote attributed to the Jewish philosopher Rabbi Abraham J. Heschel that says, “When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.” Kindness and respect are the pebbles that can slay Goliath. They allow the Holy Spirit lots of room to work. I want to be around when my husband is elderly to know that he receives good care. He has been a good father and husband, but I know his life has not been easy. We’ve both been tested in the fire over and again. We know what our journey has been and respect how hard we have worked and the trials we have endured. That’s the secret, I think. As the chant says, “Where charity and love prevail, there God is ever found.” Andreasen has worked in a variety of ministry settings for 20 years. She lives in Omaha, Neb., with her husband and five children. Wedding Guide www.TrenTon M oniTor. coM Marriage as God’s gift Continued from P W-2 faith’ to a flame.” “Believe me the Roman Catholic Church supports marriage,” stressed Msgr. Sirianni. “We see marriage as a gift from God that is a vocation of love and service. But we also see marriage as exclusive, a lifelong commitment and open to children; a vision not embraced by society. This vision is why the Church invites young people to see preparing for marriage as more than planning the day, but really a preparation for life.” While preparation for a marriage begins long before preparation for the wedding, within the relationships of the family, arranging for a wedding in a Catholic church has a specific starting point and includes a number of priorities to be considered, said Msgr. Sirianni. His suggestions include: • Call the parish first to set an appointment with one of the priests or deacons to find out what is required for getting married in the Church. • If you, or your intended, were married before, whether in a church or civil ceremony, call us. Each previous marriage needs to be reviewed before plans can be made for a wedding. • Even if the love of your life is not Catholic, the Church will work with you to prepare you both to be married in the Church, or receive the proper permission to be married. • Church law does not dictate that a church wedding has to be a lavish and expensive event! The “Big Church Wedding” is more cultural than traditional. A Catholic wedding can be as simple as the couple wants. For a valid Catholic wedding you need only the bride, the groom, two witnesses and a sacred minister (a priest, deacon or bishop). Although it would be nice to invite the parents! • The Sacrament of Matrimony is a sacrament of the Church, therefore, the proper place for the celebration is in Church. Although God is everywhere, the public character of marriage means that the sacrament takes place where the community worships … and that place is the Church. Therefore, destination weddings scheduled through wedding or travel agents, and weddings with clergy (former priests) in parks, on the beach or in the reception hall are not recognized by the Church. • If a couple does marry outside of the Church, and without Church permission, then they need to know they will be unable to stand as godparents at Baptism or sponsors at Confirmation. For a comprehensive overview of the Catholic wedding ceremony, including an overview of options for the various forms of the wedding, visit foryourmarriage.org, an initiative of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. April 26, 2012 | W-11 Marriage preparation events Sponsored by the Department of Youth, Marriage and Family Life, a variety of marriage preparation programs are offered to nurture and support engaged couples as they move toward a life together. June 8 - 10, 2012 Engaged Encounter Weekend, Stella Maris Retreat Center, Elberon Weekend Retreat for Engaged Couples Time: Fri., 7:30 pm - Sun., 4:00 pm Cost: $395.00 per couple June 16, 2012 God’s Plan Pre-Cana, St. Gregory the Great, Hamilton Square Diocesan Pre-Cana Time: Sat. 9:00 am - 4:30 pm Cost: $150.00 per couple July 21, 2012 Pre-Cana, St. Barnabas, Bayville Parish Pre-Cana in Spanish Time: Sat. 9:00 am - 4:00 pm Cost: $115.00 per couple July 21, 2012 God’s Plan Pre-Cana, St. Gregory the Great, Hamilton Square Diocesan Pre-Cana Time: Sun. 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm; Fri. 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm; Sun. 2:00 pm - 6:00 pm August 25, 2012 Cost: $115.00 per couple Pre-Cana, St. Anselm, Wayside September 28-29, 2012 Parish Pre-Cana Pre-Cana, St. Barnabas, Bayville Time: Sat. 9:30 pm - 6:30 pm Parish Pre-Cana Cost: $115.00 per couple Time: Fri. 7:30 pm - 10:30 pm, September 15, 2012 Sat. 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm Pre-Cana, St. Gabriel, Marlboro Cost: $115.00 per couple Parish Pre-Cana October 5-6, 2012 Time: Sat. 9:00 pm - 4:00 pm Pre-Cana, St. Mary, New MonCost: $115.00 per couple mouth Parish Pre-Cana September 22, 2012 Time: Fri. 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm, Pre-Cana, St. Katharine Drexel, Sat. 1:00 pm - 6:00 pm Burlington Cost: $115.00 per couple Parish Pre-Cana Time: Sat. 9:30 pm - 4:00 pm October 5-6, 2012 Cost: $115.00 per couple Pre-Cana, St. Robert Bellarmine, Freehold September 23, 28, & 30, Parish Pre-Cana 2012 Pre-Cana, St. Joan of Arc/St. Isaac Time: Fri. 7:00 pm - 10:15 pm, Sat. 12:30 pm - 5:30 pm Jogues, Marlton Cost: $115.00 per couple Parish Pre-Cana Time: Sat. 9:00 am - 4:30 pm Cost: $150.00 per couple For more information or to register for any event contact Beatriz Cancel at 609-403-7151, or bcance@dioceseoftrenton.org. For additional dates, check the Department of Youth, Marriage and Family Life webpage at www.dioceseoftrenton.org CREATING THE PERFECT UNION Battleground Country Club has the perfect blend of location and hospitality. Whether you’re envisioning an intimate gathering at our gazebo or a magical gala affair in our Grande Ballroom, you can be assured that your wedding party and guests will benefit from an impeccably run facility in a warm and comfortable environment. Battleground Country Club’s staff is available to assist you in every phase of your planning. Perfect for First Holy Communion and Christening celebrations as well. Let us make your special day truly revolutionary! 1-855-NJ-BRIDE | 1 COVENHOVEN ROAD, MANALAPAN, NJ 07726 BATTLEGROUNDCC.COM W-12 | April 26, 2012 Wedding Guide The Monitor