No. 4091 - Eton College

Transcription

THECHRONICLE
Fourth of June 2009 Edition — Issue 4091 — £5.00
THECHRONICLE // FOURTH OF JUNE 2009 EDITION
FOURTH OF JUNE 2009
TUEsDay 26 May
Speeches Rehearsal
CCF Tattoo
6.00 pm
9.30
Upper School – No tickets required
College Field – Tickets required
wEDNEsDay 27 May
Holy Communion
College Chapel Choir Practice
Chapel
ECMS Concert
Golf Family Foursomes
Tennis v Old Etonians
Aquatics
College Chapel
Song Room
College Chapel and Lower Chapel
College Chapel
Golf Course
The Tennis Courts
Dragon Boat Semi-Final
Dragon Boat Final – off Fellows’ Eyot
Indoor Pool
XI Upper Club; XXII Agar’s
Cannon Yard
Upper School (Tickets required for Sixth Form
Select)
10.45 – 11.45 School Hall
11.00
Dutchman’s (Weather dependent)
11.00
Gymnasium
11.00
College Field
from 2.15 pm Kennels
3.20
off Fellows’ Eyot – Tickets required for The Captain
of the Boats’ Enclosure
1
7.30 am
8.25
9.00
9.40—10.40
9.45
10.00
10.15
10.30
Water Polo v Mr Manley’s Scratch 10.30
10.30—6.00
Cricket v Ramblers
10.30
Fencing
10.45
Speeches
Band Concert
Polo exhibition match
Martial Arts demonstration
Croquet
Beagles : Hound Show
Procession of Boats
1, 2
1
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
10
The Pipes and the Wind Band will play on Fellows’ Eyot from 2.45 pm for The Procession of Boats
College Chapel
Eton College Gift Shop
Careers/Universities Centre
Museum of Eton Life
College Library Exhibition
Lupton’s Gallery Exhibition
Design 2009 Exhibition
Natural History Museum
Music Schools
Drawing Schools
School Library
Charity Photo Exhibition
Open during the day (except during lunch)
10.00—5.00
Barnes Pool
10.00—12.00 Barnes Pool
10.00—12.30 Brewhouse Yard
10.00—12.30 Entry via Blue Corridor
10.00—12.30 Lupton’s Gallery
10.00—3.30
School of Mechanics
10.00—12.30 Queen’s Schools
10.00—3.30
Buildings on view
10.00—4.00
Summer Exhibition
10.00—12.30 Common Lane
10.00—2.00
Caccia Studio
11
11
12
13
13
14
2
15
16
8
17
Copies of the Chronicle, Arts Review and Junior Chronicle will be on sale at the Long Walk and the Gift Shop.
Absence
4.00 pm
School Yard, Weston’s Yard, etc.
3
Editorial
‘But O the heavy change now thou art gone,
Now thou art gone and never to return’.
Lycidas, John Milton
I
t has become customary
amongst my contemporaries to bemoan the tendency
of parting editorials towards
rose-tinted sentiment. They claim
it old-fashioned to look back; selfpitying to cast a misty eye over
the past; and self-indulgent to
make even the most casual gesture of farewell. According to this
opinion, the author of the model
editorial is advised to write in
the present and to anticipate the
future, reserving scarcely a glance
for the incidents and achievements which have lit up the past.
Above all, he must be careful not
to forget that the departure of
his block marks little more than
another inevitable revolution of
the Wheel of Time.
Readers will of course sense
in my tone a distaste for such
an attitude. As the lines which
preface this piece indicate, departure and change matter. The fact
of our leaving cannot be brushed
under the carpet and dismissed
as insignificant, because it does
mean something, both for those
who are leaving and for those
who are left behind. Forgive me,
then, if I fail to heed editorial
orthodoxy and instead obstinately
cling to my belief that our passing
demands a more fitting tribute.
In the words of Cyril Connolly,
one of the school’s most eloquent
commentators, a King’s Scholar
and compeer of George Orwell,
‘the past with its anguishes and
injuries breaks down all defences
of custom and habit’.
Indeed, there is something
curiously and stirringly powerful
in the nature of departure which
resists any attempt to handle
it with trite, hollow platitudes,
and which forces us to recognise the change that it engenders. Few would deny that much
has changed during our brief
residency here: from timetable
modifications to catering innovations, from the sudden advent of
Health and Safety to the gradual
dissolution of A-Levels. Eton,
though a bastion of unyielding
tradition from without, is beset
by change from within, and to
such an extent that it is no longer
recognisable as the Eton which
educated Shelley and Connolly. No
wonder the ancient Chinese sages
were given to remarking that it
is impossible to step in the same
river twice.
Moreover, characteristic of
the human condition is a desire
to have played some formative
role in this change. On a collective level we cross our fingers
Contents
Editorial
Letters to the Editors
Russian Trip
Eton v Harrow: Croquet
An Interview with Colonel
Michael Bell OE
Barbarians Tour
Eton Cricket
The Procession of Boats
College Library
RAAC House Trip
Mental
Mufti Day
The CCF
Barcelona
Vale JR
Vale WHR
Vale MJLB
Vale JBW
Boyspeak
4
6
9
13
15
18
20
22
26
28
32
35
44
47
56
58
61
64
66
that our sporting exploits and academic successes will be extolled
for years to come. As individuals we pray for a glowing legacy
whilst hoping that our unremarkable, unremembered acts will
have brought about a friendlier,
more tolerant and more egalitarian institution. More practically
and less idealistically, we frantically carve our Calendar Names
into the cloister walls, thereby
asserting our stake in Eton’s past.
Our quest for recognition is even
reflected in and supported by
the school’s reverent yet diligent approach to its history: the
maintenance of the Archives, the
preservation of the tradition of
Annal-writing, perhaps even the
publication of The Chronicle itself,
testify to a fruitful appreciation of
the figures who have contributed
to the flourishing of Eton life.
For all the reassurance offered by the school’s generous,
gracious attitude to its leavers,
however, I suspect that each
B-Blocker, even the boy whose
claim to immortality is most secure, will saddened by his imminent departure. But, like the ageing gentlemen of Thomas Hardy’s
poem ‘An Ancient to Ancients’,
we are called to acknowledge that
our time, with all its glories and
triumphs, has passed. Already
‘these younger press’, assuming
our responsibilities, redefining our
roles and setting new change in
motion.
And so it seems appropriate to finish, as Hardy does, by
addressing our successors, and
by wishing them luck in the final
turn of their Eton careers:
‘Much is there waits you we have missed;
Much lore we leave you worth the knowing,
Much, much has lain outside our ken:
Nay, rush not: time serves, we are going,
Gentlemen’.
5
Letters to the Editors
Sirs,
I think your ‘bitesize’
Chronicle a very good (re)innovation. At least none of you has
tried to be satirical. But is the
natural evolution of a journal of
record, as opposed to opinion,
not towards a weekly podcast or
ebulletin? You could include pictures, it would be even more up
to date, and save paper.
MJLB
Dear Mr Bashaarat,
Thank you very much for
your letter, it raises a valid limitation of The Bitesize Chronicle and
an issue of waste which might
need to be addressed.
The main issue with inventing an online ebulletin of Eton
news is the nature of the one
already exists (the newly-rennovated Eton College website): it is
updated regularly with new photos and news, however it is very
rare that boys log on of their own
volition to see what is happening
in school life.
Paper is wasted, it is true,
with The Bitesize Chronicle but at
least it is glanced at or read by
the majority of the school. If we
were to leave it up to the boys
to go online to see what’s going
on in school life, then realistically
the website would not be effective inside the school; however
leave 50 copies of The Chronicle in
the slab and the boys are sure to
peruse the publication and read
about Etonian events.
In addition to this, it is
important to appreciate one of
the most crucial motives for The
Bitesize Chronicle: to archive dayto-day Eton life with a hard copy
of what happens; with a website,
all that would happen is that
the older articles would be lost
in cyberpace and this intangible
regular update wouldn’t be in
School Library or the Archives for
future generations.
However we will endeavor
to waste less paper in the future, and maybe we will be able
to include colour pictures in The
Bitesize Chronicle if funds are
adequate so to do.
Yours,
Jack Straker
Dear Sirs,
In his recent edition of The
Bitesize Chronicle, the author
clumsily managed to contract
Warhol’s much-quoted remark on
the transience of success, referring to ‘fifteen seconds of fame’
when he means ‘fifteen minutes’.
Perhaps, on some subconscious
level, he senses that his project
will be shorter-lived even than its
most trenchant detractors would
imagine?
Yours,
Pedant OS
Dear Pedant OS,
I am sorry to have caused
you such anguish during the
recent publicaton of The Bitesize
Chronicle; I apologise for this
deliberate alteration of Warhol’s
quote, but it was consistant
with the idea of making things
smaller (minutes -> seconds)
which The Bitesize Chronicle embodies. In addition to this I felt
that saying “15 minutes” would
give an unrealistic view of the
amount spent reading about a
particular individual, which was
another reason for the change to
“seconds”.
I don’t feel that Mr Warhol
would have been too aggrieved
by my changing of his mantra,
which doubtless you in your
evident knowledge of Warhol’s
work would know, as he willingly
changed it several times himself,
so as to confuse the people:
“In the future, 15 people will
be famous”
“In 15 minutes, everyone will
be famous”
Thank you very much for
your letter; do write in again if
anything in The Chronicle confuses you.
Yours,
Jack Straker
Dear Sirs,
It is probably traditional for
the letter to the editors in the 4th
June Edition of The Chronicle to be
a swansong from a B Block boy,
reminiscing on how life at Eton
has changed over his five years
in its attendance. He would relive
his greatest moments, describe
what he will miss most on leaving, and end, weeping onto his
parchment, by thanking all those
who have made his Eton career
the joy which it has been.
This is not such a letter.
As a parting shot, I would
prefer to have a tirade, as perhaps is fitting for someone who
finds themselves, like a wounded
tiger, at their bitter end, and is
thus entitled to give their opinionated perspective, on one of Eton’s
most respected institution’s: The
Chronicle itself.
Having read this year’s editions of The Chronicle and The
Bitesize Chronicle, I would like
to begin by saying that they are
schizophrenic, to the point that
I think there is a rift in how you
fine Sirs see fit to run the school
magazine. For instance, the editorial of the Michaelmas Long Leave
Edition claims that The Chronicle
“will comment, analyse, and dissect” school life, and not “simply
record, or narrate, or chronicle”.
This seemed a most noble quest,
and I must confess that you have
succeeded in this regard.
However, as much as I despise having to flog a dead horse,
I feel that The Bitesize Chronicle
runs counter to this initiative.
Despite Mr Straker’s valiant attempts to convince its (doubtless
small) readership that it is not
meant to be “witty, memorable,
or even interesting” and that it is
“unimportant”, it still manages to
hinder what its bigger brother has
set out to achieve. To my mind,
The Bitesize Chronicle should be,
as the name suggests, a smaller,
but identically composed, edition of the The Chronicle, in the
same way that Bitesize Shredded
Wheat is Shreaded Wheat, but
more petite. It should not, therefore, seek to have a different aim;
otherwise it should be a different publication. In his justification of The Bitesize Chronicle, Mr
Straker claims that it takes some
of the “chronicling” pressure
from its bigger brother. Either
communications in the morally
questionable Chronicle Suite have
broken down, or it seems that
you fine Sirs have divorced ideas
as to what it is you have been
commissioned to do.
In fact, what my tirade has
accomplished is that it has made
me finish with what I myself set
out not to do. (Keen students of
debate will see that I am being
entirely hypocritical here.) I think
The Chronicle should stick to its
mix of comment and analysis,
but in no way should it try to be
entertaining. This is not to say
that it cannot be amusing, but
this should not be its primary
aim. As the school’s official boy
publication, it should be a highbrow affair, filled with worthwhile
correspondence and opinion.
The role of school joker should
be returned to whom it resided
“back in my day”: The Ephemeral.
For younger readers, this is Eton’s
unofficial “witty banter” magazine, which is intended to make
you laugh until your shoes fall
off. Sadly, it has been out of print
for some three years now, and it
is this change in school life which
makes me most sad, for it appears to me that Eton has lost its
sense of humour.
Yours,
Crispin Royle-Davies KS
If you have an opinion, or if you would like
to respond to any of the comments made in
The Chronicle, please contact the editors at
chronicle@etoncollege.org.uk
Dear Sir,
It is with great indignation
that I take up my pen on a subject which should be of gravest
concern to all your readers. I refer
of course to the shameful manner
in which the noble and ancient
game of Croquet has been demeaned at this College.
At the last count sixty (60!)
boys have come to the Croquet
Club humbly begging admission
into its arcane ways and hallowed
halls; furthermore, within the
last month Croquet teams from
Eton have competed against, and
thoroughly trounced, rival sides
from Cranleigh, Winchester and
Harrow, not to mention the OEs.
And yet what does the Keeper of
Croquet get for all this skill and
success? One lousy mention on
page 44 of Fixtures! Scandalous!
If the Keepers of Karate (?) and
Music Technology (??), Rugby
Sevens (?!!) and Fishing (??!!)
be permitted to graduate to the
heady heights of page 30, and
to the fiercely coveted honour
of wearing stick-ups, then surely
it is high time for the Keeper of
Croquet, a game which traces
its origins back into Aztec and
Babylonian antiquity, to shoulder aside these usurpers, these
Johnnie-come-latelies, to take up
his mallet and pound the authorities into submission. Let justice
roll down like a river! Wielders
of the Mallet, unite: you have
nothing to lose but your jeans!
Let Croquet take its rightful place
among the great games of yore;
let the Keeper wear his stick-ups
with pride! Up the Revolution!
Power to the People!
I remain
Yours
Outraged of Tunbridge Wells
7
T
he Jackal, perched high in his
ivory tower, has become concerned about a general disappearance of discipline in the
school. While never on the wrong side
of the law himself, he could not help
but observe that rather more boys
than usual find themselves with a
pink slip and a murky conscience at
12.45pm in the Colonnade. However,
as much as the Jackal delights in this
increased prevalence of anarchy, when
in public, inwardly he deplores the
fact that the word Etonian appears
to have become synonymous with
toerag.
The Jackal was subjected to a
visit to the Sanatorium recently because he had frequented Mexico
during Short Leave, and was, rather
rudely, accused of being a vector of
swine influenza. While not wishing
to sound overly pompous, the Jackal
simply does not do swine influenza;
viral diseases are infra dig, and not
at all in keeping with his (carefully
cultivated) image. Yet the Jackal has
been told, with some glee, by many
of his consorts, that if a boy at Eton
were to be afflicted by this strain, that
we would all be ordered home, and
would receive our predicted grades
for this summer’s public examinations. The Jackal cannot confirm or
deny the truth of these allegations,
though his seat on the Pastoral Care
Committee means he can confirm
that the school has enough Tamiflu to
protect us from an outbreak of biblical
proportions. The Jackal dearly wishes
that it does not come to receiving
predicted grades for his examinations,
as he is predicted DDD for his subjects
(Croquet Studies, Pimm’s Making, and
Further Mathematics).
The Jackal was disappointed by
this year’s Mufti Day effort. Although
the Jackal never takes his tails off
himself, he had become accustomed
to being entertained by the blizzard
of costume from his fellows. However,
2009 was a far more sober affair. He
implores future generations to let
their hair down a tad more, if only to
save tourists from seeing over a thousand boys in blue denim, which this
year led the Jackal to conclude that
some Etonians must shop at The Gap;
an unforgivable crime. The only highlight this year, as far as the Jackal is
concerned, was a certain boy dressed
as a pregnant nun. He would like to
add, at this juncture, that any future
display of such bad taste would not
be tolerated by anyone, boy or beak.
The Jackal was shocked to discover that the sport of strip ‘bums’ has
reared its ugly head at Eton. While the
Jackal is quite partial to a game
of strip poker or strip chess, if
in the correct company, he finds
it deplorable that boys would
impinge on the view of several
senior beaks by playing scantily
clad football. The Jackal would
recommend that any boy who has
an urge to engage in such an activity should immediately consult
Dr R. Pipe, the School Counsellor,
who would see to it that such
desires are suppressed. As much
as he despises plugging people in
his literature, the Jackal must say
that Dr Pipe is simply splendid
at dealing with such problems.
This year he has helped the Jackal
to overcome his uncontrollable
urge to purchase kebabs from
Windsor at half past midnight on
weekdays.
From his vantage point over
College Field, the Jackal has been
observing the Tattoo practices of a
Monday quiet hour. While he approves of the regular programme
of Star Wars, et al., he must say
that the band has been more
subdued this year than before.
The Jackal would like to think that
his discussion with the Adjutant
about disturbing his siesta was
responsible for this tweaking of
the volume knob, yet the Jackal
has come to the conclusion that it
is, in fact, because the Combined
Cadet Force is smaller this year
than he can remember it ever being. This saddens the Jackal, as he
always thought it prudent to have
Etonians in the Armed Forces, in
case of an ambush from Windsor
Boys’ School, in which instance
it is advisable to have personnel capable of manhandling light
artillery and defending a castle
against all manner of foe.
Russian Trip
John Gowers KS spent his Easter in
Moscow and Saint-Petersburg.
T
he 2009 D Block tour
of Moscow and SaintPetersburg was both
interesting and eventful.
From the beautiful artworks of
the Hermitage and the Pushkin
gallery, to the historical Catherine
Palace at Tsarskoye Syelo and
the Yusupov palace, to the
unique sounds of Kasta and Garik
Sukachev, the tour covered all
aspects of the amazing country
that is Russia. The group visited
Saint Petersburg first, and we
were amazed by the beauty of the
place, and the amazing art and
architecture. Of the many views
we had of Saint Petersburg, including from the top of St Isaac’s
cathedral, perhaps the most
beautiful was looking across the
snow-covered Neva, the principal
river of the city, to the buildings
which make up the Hermitage
museum.
The Hermitage is made up
of five buildings – the Winter
Palace, the Small Hermitage, the
Old Hermitage, the New Hermitage
and the Hermitage Theatre, and
houses over three million exhibits, of which only 7% are on
display at any one time. It was
interesting to hear that, in order
to look at every one for just six
seconds would take six years.
Unfortunately, we only had three
hours, but it was enough to cover
many beautiful works.
The section of the museum
which we visited was the Western
European section, which covered
9
a large period of time, from the
first religious icons through to
impressionism and cubism. Out
of all the paintings (which include works by Gaugin, Picasso,
Rembrandt and even two by
Leonardo da Vinci) the best is
probably Rembrandt’s Danae,
featuring the mythological princess Danae being impregnated by
the god Zeus. Unfortunately for
the painting, it was attacked by a
protestor using a knife and acid,
and it had to be restored.
While in Saint Petersburg,
we also went to the Yusupov
palace, where Rasputin was
murdered, and Catherine’s Palace
in Tsarskoye Syelo, which boasts
the amazing Amber room. In the
evenings we went to a concert
given by Kasta, Russia’s top rapartist, and we spent an evening
in the Djimi Chyendrix Blyooz
Klub listening to the band Jets.
On the last day, we visited the
Peter and Paul fortress, where
Saint-Petersburg was founded,
which contained, among other
things, a prison which had held
figures as notable as Maxim Gorky
and Lev Trotsky, and a cathedral
where several Russian Emperors,
Empresses and members of the
Royal family were buried, including Peter the Great and Catherine
the Great. That evening, we
boarded the overnight train for
Moscow.
Moscow is a very different
place from Saint-Petersburg in a
number of ways. Being located
further into Russia than SaintPetersburg, perched on the gulf
of Finland, it is less Western and
more Russian. It took over the
role of capital city from SaintPetersburg before the industrialization of the country, and so
it has a lot more tall buildings,
including the ‘Seven Sisters of
Moscow’, seven tall buildings all
built on roughly the same design,
but now used for very different
purposes. The city is dominated
by the Kremlin, on the side of the
river Moskva, and the surround-
ing area. A lot of our activities in
Moscow were based around the
Kremlin, such as visiting the Red
Square, Saint Basil’s cathedral,
Lenin’s mausoleum and GUM, a
massive department store built
under the Communist Regime,
going to a ballet in the Kremlin
Theatre, and going inside the
Kremlin itself, which contained
the largest bell in the world, the
largest cannon in the world and
a huge cathedral decorated with
icons and wall paintings. The
Kremlin consists of the old city
of Moscow, and its forbidding
red walls are the old walls of the
city. It is now used as the office of President Medvedev and
his (and Vladimir Putin’s) government. The Red Square just
outside is the site of Saint Basil’s
cathedral, famous for its onion
shaped domes, and Lenin’s tomb,
a massive Soviet-style mausoleum. Outside the Kremlin, we
had a panoramic view of the city
from the top of the Cathedral of
Christ the Saviour, and we visited
a Russian school, which was very
exciting. We went to the circus,
which was amazing, featuring
acrobats, clowns, trapeze artists
and even several lions and tigers.
We also visited the Pushkin gallery, home to many great works
of Western art. One evening we
went to a concert given by Garik
Sukachev, a vey famous Russian
singer, which was exhilarating.
We were tired at the end of
the trip, but we were we happy to
have experienced such a wonderful place as Russia.
Eton Action Football
Laurent de
Brabandt
(MAG) looks at
the success of
his charitable
initiative.
O
n the 17th May Eton
Action has once again
organised a memorable
event for the benefit of a
charity. This time Medecins Sans
Frontiers UK had been selected by
the committee in order to support
their ongoing successful activities
is war prone areas such as Sudan
and Sri Lanka.
The five-a-side tournament
took place on Chamber Field and
included around 70 entrants from
all blocks split into 12 different
teams. After some great performances in the group stages,
especially by individuals such
as O. Humphreys (MNF) and F.
Sawkins (NCWS), who represented
Nutter Eleven and just missed
out on joining the final four. The
semi-finals where played between Fantastic Five (Saunders as
captain), October Elites (Walker),
Multiple Scorgasms (Gray) and
Booma (Funnell):
The October Elites: Walker
(MAG), Grootenhuis (MAG),
Evans (RAAC), Marcq (WFM) and
Macinnes (MJLB)
Multiple Scorgasms: Gray
(PB), Shaw-Stewart (NCWS),
Troughton (RDO-C), Hayer (RDO-C),
Lloyd-Webber (PB) and Walia
(NCWS).
Fantastic Five: Saunders
(MAG), Zehner (MAG), Touche
(MAG), Elliott (MAG), Coombs
(MAG) and Wrigglesworth (MAG).
Booma: Funnell (AW), Tidbury
(NJR), Hanbury-Williams (WFM),
MacKean (DMG) and Haldane ma
(AW).
The first semi-final proved to
be very physical and was played
between the October Elites and
Multiple Scorgasms. Shaw-Stewart
11
and Troughton played an excellent tournament, with that game
showing them on top of their
game – a lethal duo upfront,
which made it difficult for Marcq
& co. to counter them. Also defensively Gray was taking care of
Grootenhuis who was the main
danger man in the well rounded
October team. In the end individual class got the Multiple
Scorgasms through to the final by
winning 3-1.
The second semi-final was
contested by the all MAG Fantastic
Five team, who dominated their
group stage group, and Booma
who showed their determination
and stamina in a tough group
beforehand. Saunders pulled his
team along against and managed
to spark against a superior opponent for whom MacKean was the
security in defence and HanburyWilliams an ace in attack. Towards
the end the Fantastic Fives could
no longer withstand the constant
pressing from Booma and were
thrown into the 3rd /4th play-off
after a 9-1 defeat.
October Elites finished strong
by securing third place against
Fantastic Five in the “small final”.
Being closely watched by the
Headmaster and Provost the final
commenced under GJP’s custody.
Goals from Shaw-Stewart and a
truly amazing volley by HanburyWilliams heated the atmosphere
among the spectators on Chamber
Field. In spite of the rain, the
football was rolling as each player
wanted: cutting through-balls and
pulsating skill marked this highly
disputed final. By the last minute
it was 5:4 to Booma, however it
was a penalty which prolonged
the game to go into a penalty
shoot-out, which the Multiple
Scorgasms managed to decide by
a Troughton save and a Walia final
goal.
The impressive winner’s cup
was presented by the Headmaster
who was impressed by all performances and keen to repeat
such an event on an even larger
scale in the future.
Special thanks to GBR, JMG,
MAG, TEB, GJP and DJF for refereeing and helping to organise the
event.
Eton v Harrow: Croquet
Jack Straker
reports on the
year’s finest
victory over
Harrow.
O
n Tuesday 12th May Eton
played host to our historic rivals on College Field
in the afternoon. After a
heated dispute over the pairings
as to who got to go with Toby
Toller (MAG), we settled into our
matches. Despite appearing jovial
on the surface, the tensions soon
began to rise for the “first” pair:
the Keeper of Croquet Fred Clark
(RJM) and George Hasell-McCosh
(RPDF) asserted their authority quickly with an excellent hit
off the mark from the former,
however the pace of the game
slowed as the Harrovian duo kept
themselves close to each other
and chose to roquet the Etonians
rather than progress through the
hoops. Meanwhile on the other
side of College Field, Eton’s “second” pair of Toby Toller and Jack
Straker (IH) roared ahead after
some clinical dolly rushes and
split shots from Toby; practising
for four hours every day at the
Hurlingham since he was 12 has
given him pinpoint accuracy and
an encyclopedic knowledge of the
Association Rules of croquet.
Fred and George eventually
rid themselves of their counterparts from the “other place” and
skipped through several hoops,
one particularly impressive longrange shot from the Pipe Major
catching everyone’s eye. Toby
continued to split the Harrovian
13
double up and to take Jack along
with him wherever he went, and
soon there was the trifling matter
of two hoops to go, having rocketed ahead of the Harrow pair who
were stuck on the second hoop
after being rushed to the other
side of the pitch multiple times
by our “GB Bronze Medalist”.
By this time Fred and George
were still to go through the 3rd
hoop, and made steady progress
whilst their opposition were
floundering on hoop number 2.
The “second” pair took their opportunities very well over the next
few turns, and after Jack managing to navigate around the rabbit
warren surrounding the 5th hoop,
Toby finished in some style with
a chip shot from 2 yards to go
through hoop 6 over Jack’s ball,
and then immediately hitting both
Jack and his balls onto the post
in one roquet just to add insult to
injury for the Harrow pair.
The four croqueteers moved
over to the allure of the tea stand
to watch the 1st pair’s game be
decided. Eton’s second victory
of the day came soon after its
first, with Fred and George coming through to win a landslide
victory - despite finishing after
the second pair, their victory was
more comprehensive: Harrow
were stranded having cleared just
two hoops, compared to the three
that the second pair’s rivals managed to pass through.
The Croquet Club offer their
thanks to Rev. Murray “Killer
Mallet” Bean for organising this
wonderful day and to Brigadier
Hague, the croquet professional,
for helping us to a wonderful
result.
An Interview
Chr: You’re one of the oldest
living OEs, leaving Eton in 1929
– how would you describe your
Eton career?
M: Well my career at Eton was
fairly undistinguished! I was in
Brinton’s house for two halves
and he was very bad tempered
because of his arthritis, and
then George Lyttleton arrived as
my tutor for the rest of my time
there.
Chr: The George Lyttleton?
M: Yes, but the fagging and
beating was more out of control
in his house than any other: the
head of house at the time was
a complete sadist! Sadly I don’t
think George Lyttleton had enough
grip on the senior boys of the
house. But I especially enjoyed
the end of my career at Eton.
Chr: Was that your fondest time
at Eton?
M: Definitely – there was what
they called the First Hundred
which was the time when the top
year had passed all their exams;
that was a lovely time, a very idle
time! I think the best thing about
Eton for me was the people I met,
and the ambiance of the school: it
is a lovely school like no other.
Chr: We’ve recently welcomed
a new Provost to Eton, Lord
Waldegrave; what do you
remember the Provost’s role at
Eton being?
ew with Colonel Michael Bell OE
15
M: The Provost was M. R. James,
who wrote wonderful ghost
stories. My great memory of him
was his courtesy – when you took
your top hat off to the provost, he
always removed his mortarboard
back to you and smiled, which
other beaks didn’t. I never knew
him, but I remember hearing the
saying that “the Provost does
nothing and when he’s on holiday
the vice-Provost does it for him”!
Chr: Ah, how times have changed!
Did you have an introduction to
the army in the Corps?
M: Yes, I was in the Corps. I
was in the Scouts first, and I
remember shaking hands with
Robert Baden-Powell when he
came down and we must have
been terribly scruffy-looking – you
were supposed to shake hands
with your left hand, but half the
boys stuck out their right hand to
greet him instead! Then I moved
to the Corps which was very
enjoyable especially the Field
Days. We used to get there by
train which was an awful riot – I
remember two boys leaning out
of the windows to hit each other
with their rucksacks and when
a train came past the other way
it demolished the bags and only
just missed their heads!
Chr: Nowadays it’s fairly
commonplace for boys to go
straight to university after leaving
Eton; how many boys when you
were there went to further their
education rather than going to
work, for example in the army?
M: I think a lot of boys went
into the army. The thing was,
you seemed automatically to go
into the armed forces for about
three years while you were
thinking what to do. Then some
people who were in banking,
for example, or some other
hereditary business, would go
and do that. The three years
in the army was a part of your
education.
Chr: Wellington said that the
Battle of Waterloo was won on the
playing fields of Eton – how would
you say Eton contributed towards
your military career?
M: I think that fact that you were
an Etonian in those days was
really something special. That
helped in the army, in a way,
because if there was a choice
between someone who – you
hardly dare say it now – wasn’t a
gentleman, and a gentleman who
went to Eton, the Etonian would
be preferred.
Chr: Would that be because
they’d been through a rigorous
education at Eton, being prepared
for later life and used to following
orders?
M: Yes, public school life was
tough and people said that Eton
prepared you for the ordeals you
had to face in battle or during the
routine of everyday army life.
Chr: You were assigned to Errol
Flynn and David Niven, the
famous actors. What was life like
with them in the army?
M: Well, I joined my regiment in
Dover and I was welcomed by
David. There were four regiments
in Dover and some of my friends
had a torrid time as it was the
habit of some regiments not to
talk to the new officer for six
months after his arrival. This
was the complete opposite
of my regiment, where I was
welcomed and everyone was
very pleasant. Dave Niven and
Michael Trubshawe were two of
the men in my regiment who
took me out in the evenings
and were heavy drinkers – they
completed my education! Our
battalion was about two or three
hundred strong and yet David
knew the names of practically
everyone in it; I have no idea how
he managed that. It was a lovely
regiment to join and, I have to
say, as it was the home battalion
we were rather idle!
I was terribly pleased at, and I
came back up to Northumberland,
rented a farm up here and
enjoyed that very much, along
with a considerable amount of
shooting!
Chr: Well, you took the surrender
of Bremen in 1945 – that must
have been very different from
those lazy days!
Chr: So you still get out there
then?
M: Near the end of the war, we
tried to make them surrender
in one or two instances, but the
German army was a wonderful
army – look at what they endured.
When we finally went into Bremen
on the eighth of May there was
a moment when I realised I
had been taut for months, and
suddenly everything relaxed and
was alright. I personally ended
the war in the back of a tank in
Bremen. We liberated about thirty
two cars in the regiment – you
don’t loot, of course you liberate!
I remember the commanding
officer and I were driving in a
German car and passed a column
of German soldiers marching in
step, and not a single one failed
to salute. What an army!
Chr: Do you still occasionally
venture out with a gun?
M: Every year I’ve tried to shoot
a pheasant, a grouse and catch
a fish but sadly this year for the
first time I didn’t manage to get
any pheasants.
M: Yes, I still enjoy picking up
very much, although I think
that to go out to lunch in winter
and meet all your friends is
more enjoyable than the actual
shooting or picking up.
Chr: Thank you very much for this
interview.
Chr: So a far cry from your Eton
Corps days!
M: Exactly!
Chr: So what did you do after
your army career?
M: Well, I retired at fifty which
17
Barbarians Tour
Chris Meurice
(RAAC) and Jack
Hammond (MJP)
chronicle their
tour to America
over Easter.
H
alfway through this past
Easter, 25 rugby players from all over England
gathered together to
play what was for most, our first
international encounter. The opposition: the U18 USA ‘Eagles’. As
it stood, the team comprised of
a southern tight five, a predominantly northern back-row and a
mixture of southern and northern
backs, all of whom had played
in the previous 5 or so selection
games and led by the capable
Tom Jewers of St. Benedicts.
Even at the airport, we felt
nervous about coming up against
the US national side, with the
rumours of big American football
drop-outs ready to tear into us at
the first whistle, but as we got to
know each other it was obvious
that the Barbarian ethos of having
fun and trying out new things
was going to be our main advantage against the less-experienced
Americans. With our game-plan
of expansive and risky rugby,
throwing the ball around from
everywhere and attacking from
anywhere on the pitch, we all
knew that as long as we played to
our strengths, we could penetrate
any defence, no matter how big
or well-drilled.
On arrival in Atlanta, we
explored our hotel and surroundings, pleased to see that we were
just within walking distance of
the famous all-American ‘WaffleHouse’. The plan was a warmup game using our ‘A’ side and
then the real Test at the end of
the week, for which they even
shipped in the Daily Mail winning Truro centre after he won
the final. We set about gelling as
a team and training for the first
match.
The training game took
place at night under floodlights
at Life University, which was a
new experience for most of us.
Unfortunately, the weather turned
sour and we played in a mud
bath, unable to shift the ball
far in true BaaBaa style. Within
the first quarter, the US team’s
discipline disintegrated as two
were booked to dangerous speaktackles and violent play, which
left them open for our first try
of the tour, a scorching 55 metre
run by Uppingham’s winger, Will
Burrows. Order returned to the
pitch and steady kicking from the
Eagle’s stand-off led them back
and beyond our converted try to
finish the game 12-7 to the US.
Frustrated by their tactics and
failure to break our line for 80
minutes, we were left to lick our
wounds, Tom Atkinson (Radley
Full-back) in particular who was
severely trampled one metre from
their try-line in a last-ditch carry.
The only lasting injury was that of
the formidable Wellington prop,
Hamish Fletcher, who sat out the
rest of the tour.
Trying to forget our loss we
headed to a volleyball convention,
followed by Hooters the very next
day and a baseball game with the
Atlanta Braves, which was disappointingly lacking in cheerleaders.
Finally, we headed for the
main game, this time held at midmorning of our last day, on a dry
pitch and under a blazing sun.
We were both very pleased to be
chosen in the starting team. After
belting out ‘God Save the Queen’,
we set about our revenge. Back to
Barbarian form, we started optimistically, getting ahead by two
tries at half time. Playing to our
pattern, we threw the ball around
ambitiously, every line-out off the
top, every penalty taken quick
and every phase different. As the
Eagles tried to slow the game
down, we attacked their set-pieces, winning three scrums against
the head with Jack Hammond
(MJP), Chris Meurice (RAAC) and
Alex Spooner (Harrow Captain and
hooker) in the front row. Thinking
the game was over, we were
caught by surprise when the Truro
centre came on in the last quarter
to lead their counter-attack. 10
minutes later we were just 3329 up and they were pilling on
the pressure, but in a stubborn
performance we prevented any
further line-breaks and closed the
game out with their last attack
finishing 5 metres from our line.
Relieved, and glad that we
had put in a proper Barbarian
performance, we all went home
friends, having bonded over the
week into an efficient unit capable of scalping the USA national
team.
19
Eton
Cricket
TEB celebrates
Eton’s ﬂourishing
cricket.
C
onfident, skilful cricketers
who respect their opponent and the game. This is
what Eton cricket is trying
to achieve. Boys who enjoy playing and play well, true to themselves and to the demands of the
sport.
We have been lucky to have
had favourable weather in the
first month of the half, and only
one match has been abandoned
(the XXII at Marlborough). The
pitches at Eton have been excellent, thanks to to the skilled
work of the ground staff. Upper
Club plays true, and gives something to the committed bowler, a
proper cricket pitch, while remaining one of the best places
on the circuit to bat. For the XI,
Ivo Hobson, Will Vanderspar, Ajay
Sangha and Rory Cox have all
been in the runs, with a century
each, while Ed Gross looks classy
and solid at number five and
Alex Gibson a dangerous six. Ted
Morrison has led the attack with
his left-arm inswingers and has
18 wickets so far, including 5-37
against the MCC, an outstanding
performance. Convincing wins
over Marlborough, I Zingari, MCC,
Oakham, Wellington and Radley
were slightly tempered by a last
ball defeat in a low-scoring match
at Charterhouse. The XI have
the resilience to recover from
this, and recovered with a good
win against Tonbridge the next
weekend.
There are 24 other teams
beyond the XI, and they’ve seen
plenty of good performances, too.
Teddy James is the leading run
scorer for Threepenny 1, while
Tom Shaw has scored a century
and three 50s for Upper Sixpenny
A. Other century makers include
Nico Fitzroy for the XXII, Charlie
Steel and Mungo Haldane for
Upper Sixpenny C, Jonnie Marion
and Henry Longstaff for Lower
Sixpenny C, Nick Woollhead for
Threepenny 2, Tom Raichura
for Threepenny 3, Harry Morris
for Threepenny 5, and Geordie
Sinclair for Lower Sixpenny B top
scores with 164*.
Five wicket hauls for bowlers
have been rarer - they are limited
to shorter spells by ECB regulations, for one thing, and by overs
cricket in general for another. But
if it is easy to single out a batsman for a high score, it is often
easy to underestimate the contribution that bowlers make to
winning games, one crucial wicket
or good over when the pressure
is on can make the difference,
and the list would be very long
of those who had performed
well under those circumstances.
Proper fielding is also vital, and
catching and throwing techniques
are under constant supervision not least to increase enjoyment of
this important part of the game.
Eton’s cricketers continued to be blessed with excellent
coaches - John Rice, the cricket
professional, deserves all the
praise he modestly shuns, and
more - he has a sure touch in a
sport where confidence is a key
issue. Richard Montgomerie has
joined us with new ideas from his
succesful playing days at Sussex
and has invigorated our thinking, along with Phil Macleod, our
resident cricketer-philosopher.
Mark Williams has guided the
Lower Sixpenny to the far end of
the Lords Taverners competition
again, while Jim O’Brien and Tom
Allen dispense wisdom, effective
game plans and long-term advice.
And it’s not just the high profile
coaches who give great service –
throughout the cricket structure
more than 50 Masters (including House Masters and Heads of
Department) give time, energy
and skill to what they are doing
with their afternoons. It’s a privilege for cricket to be highlighted
on the Fourth of June and I hope
that the cricket you see being
played today lives up to the high
expectations we all have of it.
E  H
S J  , 11
L’ C G
1730
1751
1792
1796
1805
1831
1880
1882
1897
1899
1921
1928
First recorded game at Eton College
Old Etonians play against ‘The
Rest of England’ in a 3 match series on which more than £20,000
was reportedly bet. (W1L1D1)
Old Etonians play against Calcutta Cricket Club in Calcutta.
First Eton v Winchester school
match
Eton v Harrow at Lord’s (Eton win
by an innings and 2 runs)
Eton reported to be wearing light
blue caps.
Lord Harris captains England v
first visiting Australia XI. The
Hon. Alfred Lyttelton is also in
the England side.
The Hon. Ivo Bligh, C.T. Studd
and G.B. Studd tour Australia
with England. Bligh receives the
ashes of a bail…
BJT Bosanquet invents the googly
Lord Hawke captains England v
South Africa
The Hon. Lionel Tennyson captains England
G.O. Allen represents England
in Australia (he refuses to bowl
bodyline…)
1936
G.O. Allen captains England in
Australia
1948
George Mann captains England in
South Africa
1961
C. Ingleby-Mackenzie captains
Hampshire to the Championship
1972
John Barclay captains England
Young Cricketers in West Indies
1987/8 First school tour to Australia
1994
Eton Under 15 win Lord’s Taverners National Cup
1997/8 Matthew Fleming represents
England in 11 ODIs
2000
Alex Loudon captains England
U19
2001
2006
2006
Alex Loudon represents England
in 1 ODI
2007
2008
William Vanderspar sets a new
record for runs scored in a season (1064)
2009
John Barclay elected President of
the MCC
P   .
T  ,   ,    — 
F     -,
   : ..
21
The Procession of Boats
Harry Peel Yates (DMG), Ninth Man in
the Monarch, relates the history of the
boating display seen on the
Fourth of June.
A
s the Procession of boats
glides past Fellows’ Eyot
this afternoon, you might
wonder about the history
of this most eccentric Eton event.
Water pageants on the river
Thames have been recorded as
far back as the thirteenth century.
Eton’s water pageants began very
informally: boys would amuse
themselves rowing up and down
on the river in fancy dress with
flags adorning their boats. The
first recorded pageant took place
on the 4th June 1793. It was to
celebrate the birthday of King
George III; however, this was done
without the permission of the
Head Master or any beak. The
peak of the procession’s illegality
came when the Head Master at
the time, Dr. Keate, had to decline
a request from King William IV’s
to watch the procession on the
grounds that he “did not know
there was such a thing.”
In 1840 the school finally
acknowledged rowing as a school
sport and the Procession of Boats
took a more legitimate place in
the Eton calendar; by this time
the structure of the event was
largely set in place. The actions of
Admiral Lord Nelson’s navy before
middle below: the three
precarious stages of raising
the oars
and after the battle of Trafalgar
in 1805 had and still have a huge
influence on the Procession of
Boats: the uniforms which the
boys donned sought to imitate
the dress of Nelson’s Navy; many
of the outfits worn today are
from the Victorian era. The names
of many of the boats in the
Procession were present in the
British Fleet at Trafalgar and were
widely used in the Napoleonic
Era.
Up until 1966 the procession was performed twice on the
Fourth of June. The first performance came in the afternoon
and the second in the evening,
often with fireworks in the background. The reason for the second
Procession being stopped was
the result of a prank: a team of
OE frogmen toppled some of the
boats as they raised their oars
(allegedly one of the divers was
Sir Ranulph Fiennes). Safety was
the principal factor that curtailed
the celebrations in the aftermath
of this incident.
The boats have their own
stories through their names and
blade colours. From year to year
the boat rowed by a crew can
change but in general the list
remains the same. The first of the
boats to process is the ‘Monarch’.
The Monarch is reputed to be the
only 10-oar boat in the world;
to date it has no challengers. It
consists of four ex officio rowers, the Captain of the School,
Captain of the Oppidans, Captain
of Boats and the Ninth Man in
the Monarch. The remainder are
23
‘members of the Monarch’. Their
job is to act as river prefects.
They perform a vital duty in aiding with the running of internal
rowing events and with river safety, and are organised by the Ninth
Man. Their blades are coloured
dark blue; the original Monarch
boat was a French ship called
“Monarque” captured at the
second battle of Cape Finisterre in
1747.
The second boat to process
is ‘Victory’, which is crewed by
the VIII. Their blades are coloured
Eton Blue and the boat’s name
is shared with that of Nelson’s
Flagship at the Battle of Trafalgar.
Behind the VIII is the 2nd VIII in
the ‘Prince of Wales’, rowing with
crimson oars. Her name is shared
with another ship of Nelson’s
navy, launched in 1765. The fourth
crew to process is the third VIII
rowing in ‘St. George’ with scarlet
oars. They are followed by the
Colts A in ‘Britannia’, rowing with
royal blue oars, and ‘Hibernia’,
crewed by the Colts B, follows
them with green oars. The Colts
C is next in ‘Thetis’, named
after the Sea Nymph who was
mother of Achilles; her namesake
LEFT: fourth of june 1913 and
the visit of king george and
queen mary.
top left: The nearest
processing boat is ‘Thetis’,
with the monarch wearing
traditional black boaters.
was originally a Spanish ship,
captured before the battle of
Trafalgar. Today she has purple
oars. The Junior Colts A process in
‘Defiance’ with mauve oars. Her
namesake did fight at the Battle
of Trafalgar and she suffered 3
mutinies in her lifetime.
The final two boats to process past are two of the newest.
They have been built by the current Head Boatman, Mr. Andrew
Cross, who also repairs much of
the damage that boys cause to
the modern racing eights. The
Junior Colts B are in ‘Alexandra’
with black oars and the Junior
Colts C are in ‘Dreadnought’ with
pink ones. HMS Dreadnought was
part of the fleet at Trafalgar and
suffered relatively minor casualties; the sixth version of the
Dreadnought was the first ship
of the royal Navy to be powered
by steam turbines, prompting an
entire class of subsequent ships
which were named Dreadnoughts
– HMS Alexandra was a broadside
ironclad ship and the most successful of her kind.
So as you sit watching the
boats glide gently by this afternoon, I hope that you may now
know a little more about something that is forever Eton.
top right: boys in ‘thetis’
raise their oars
middle right: the pipe band
play during the procession
BOTTOM RIGHT: A more modern
Monarch process, saluting
with their boaters but not
raising their oars.
25
College Library
RLMB profiles the current exhibition.
A
t the beginning of
Alice’s Adventures in
Wonderland, the heroine
memorably asks, ‘What is
the use of a book…without pictures or conversations?’ Pictures
in books are things we take for
granted. Images have been used
to supplement the verbal content
of books down the ages. Within a
few years of the invention of the
printing press in the 15th century,
technologies were developed to
mass-produce pictures to accompany the printed word. The
continual development of simpler
and cheaper methods of book
illustration, especially since the
mid-19th century—from cost-effective colour printing to photography to electronic publishing—has
produced the high volume and
vast array of combinations of text
and image with which we are so
familiar.
The forthcoming special exhibition in College Library brings
together a selection of printed
volumes representing 400 years
of book illustration, from the 15th
century to the 19th. The dates of
the exhibits coincide closely with
those of the hand-press period in
Europe, the era in the history of
printing predating the introduction of steam-powered machinery and mechanical processes of
reproducing images. An array of
architectural, topographic, scientific, technical, instructional and
literary illustrations is on display.
These illustrations serve many
functions: decorative, didactic,
documentary, interpretative. Some
are recognised as works of art in
their own right.
An overview of elements of
design, both adapted from manuscript models and developed to
suit the peculiar strengths and
requirements of mass-production,
is followed by an introduction to
tools and techniques. An acquaintance with the particular
effects and material constraints
of the three manual processes for
reproducing images—relief, intaglio and surface (planographic)
printing—gives a sense of the artistry and craftsmanship involved
in drawing and reproducing the
images in the books on display
throughout the exhibition.
Among the exhibits relating to techniques is the library’s
copy of the Nuremberg Chronicle
(1493), one of the finest examples
of early printing. Its vivid pictures of cities, maps and biblical,
religious and political figures were
designed by the workshop in
which Albrecht Dürer had trained.
Lavishly illustrated, this history of
the world popularised the extensive use of woodcuts, the first
method of graphic reproduction to
be used in printing.
A picture, once prepared for
printing as a woodcut, an engraving, an etching or a lithograph,
can be repeated countless times
with little loss of form, detail or
accuracy. The ability faithfully to
reproduce works requiring precise
pictures and diagrams contributed
significantly to expanding the
study of such subjects as anatomy, cartography, engineering and
natural history. A section of the
exhibition devoted to instructional
works includes a schoolbook,
handbooks and treatises. These
texts are supported and enhanced
by didactic and documentary illustrations that contribute meaning that words alone cannot
convey.
One of the greatest examples
of such instructional works is
Vesalius’ treatise on the human
body, De humani corporis fabrica. The founding text of modern
anatomy, it owed much of its
tremendous impact to its illustrations of dissections. The book’s
influence extended to painters
and sculptors as well as to physicians and anatomists. Vesalius
closely supervised the production of the exquisite pictures and
concerned himself with their accuracy, aesthetics and placement
in the text. A copy of the second
edition (1555) is on view.
The capacity of pictures to
add to and modify the meaning
of a text is explored further in the
final section of the exhibition, on
literary illustration. Illustrations
of imaginative literature often
provide straightforward representation of an author’s description
of a scene. They also can function
on a more conceptual level to
realise significant aspects of the
text. Such illustrations may create
a mood, suggest the pacing of
the plot, indicate links between
characters, gesture toward overarching themes, provide a parallel
or contradictory statement to the
words on the page, or otherwise
act to interpret the story.
One volume on display in
this section is Hypnerotomachia
Poliphili (1499), probably the
finest illustrated book of the
Renaissance and one of the most
highly regarded examples of literary illustration in any age. The
woodcuts visually reinforce the
movement of the plot, and symbols and pictorial puns exercise
the reader’s interpretative abilities. Although the language of the
narrative is notoriously difficult—
some would say unreadable—the
virtuosity of the illustrations and
the harmonious integration of image and text are exceptional.
In the Nuremberg Chronicle,
De Fabrica and Hypnerotomachia,
as in a number of other books
in the exhibition, artistry goes
beyond the juxtaposition of text
and image. The illustrations have
been integrated with other components of the book – words,
design, typography, materials – to
produce a unified whole, the book
as a form of art.
In mentioning a few highlights from the exhibition, I have
focused here on some of the
earliest printed books on display.
Among the other exhibits awaiting the viewer are illustrations by
Hans Holbein, Wenceslaus Hollar,
William Blake, Thomas Bewick and
J.M.W. Turner, as well as works by
Miguel de Cervantes, Inigo Jones,
John Milton, Robert Hooke and
Charles Dickens.
Pictures in Print will run
from 27 May to 16 September
2009. College Library’s opening
hours are Monday to Friday, 9.301 and 2-5. For further information, please contact the library at
collections@etoncollege.org.uk or
01753 671 221.
27
RAAC House Trip
RAAC’s Passage to India.
T
his, the fifth house trip
abroad, was a new style
of venture. For once we
were going to countries
that were neither communist nor
post-communist, and to one of
which is the largest democracy
in the world. Time constraints
meant that we were restricted to
the Golden Triangle in India and
the Kathmandu Valley in Nepal,
but I am left in no doubt that the
seeds have been sown amongst
many of the party to further explore regions of both countries. Travel between sites in both
India and Nepal was done by
private coach or, in the case of
the journey from Delhi to Ajmer,
by train. For some this was the
opportunity to catch up on sleep;
for most it offered the opportunity to see rural areas at first
hand which, given the extreme
poverty in both countries, was an
eye-opening experience. Lunch
was almost always taken in local
restaurants, so there was the opportunity to rub shoulders with
the local people, and there were
myriad opportunities throughout
the tour to walk freely in the
cities that we visited. Our accommodation in five star hotels
could not have afforded a greater
contrast with what we were to
see during the day: hotel porters
saluting us on arrival, garlands of
flowers being placed round our
necks as we checked in and porters to carry our bags at all times.
Photographs can only capture the
sights, the beauty of the monuments and the bright colours of
all that one sees; they cannot
capture the noise, the buzz, the
movement and the smells of two
countries which are so very different from the UK. Cows, stray dogs
and monkeys are everywhere,
as are carts pulled by camels or
oxen; cars, lorries and coaches
are all equipped with loud horns,
generating noise levels that are
unbelievable.
After settling into our hotel in Delhi on the first day we
toured the city, gaining a valuable
introduction to life in India and
the magnificence of the sights we
were to encounter in the coming two weeks. Then, after some
much needed sleep, we travelled
to Pushkar, via Ajmer, and had
the chance to walk through the
city to the lake, where the group
received instruction in Hinduism.
Later, after a warm welcome,
lunch and a guided tour of Mayo
College by the three boys who
will be in Eton on exchange
this summer half, it was on to
Jaipur, where we had an extensive tour of the Maharaja’s City
Palace and the incredible Jantar
Mantar, an open-air observatory
made of stone and marble. The
next morning, ascent was made
to the Amber Fort by elephant;
the afternoon saw us travel to
Ranthambore, where we spent
the night in a colonial style hotel
built round an open-air swimming pool, for an early start to
the Tiger Reserve and National
Park the next morning. We fed
wild birds and monkeys by hand,
saw various species of deer in
their hundreds and crocodiles
sunning themselves only yards
from our open-topped vehicle, but
nobody will ever forget following
a wild tiger up a path through the
bush. After breakfast at the hotel,
there was a long coach journey
to Bharatpur and a visit to the
Keoladeo Bird Sanctuary, that
was done on foot and by bicycle
rickshaw. An intriguing insight
into the activities of Old Etonians
was given by the board showing
precisely how many birds they
had hunted and killed in years
gone by – well, given that the list
began with Lord Curzon, we assumed that the remainder were
OEs as well! The next day saw us
leave Bharatpur for the journey
to Agra, via the deserted, though
magnificent, fortress of Fatehpur
Sikri. The day in Agra began with
a visit to the Agra Fort from which
we could see what for many was
expected to be the highlight of
the tour, the Taj Mahal. Given
that one is recommended to see
the monument at either sunrise
or sunset, we delayed our visit
until late afternoon, and it did
not disappoint, particularly as the
sun set and the colour seemed to
change from white to gold. This
had to be the place for the group
photograph.
Then, the following day, it
was back to Delhi, this time via
a sanctuary for bears that have
been rescued from the cruel
practice of dancing in villages
throughout India. After a visit to
the Red Fort, claimed to be one
of the most spectacular palaces
in the world, we completed our
tour of Delhi, seeing the monuments we had not had time to
see on our first day. Then it was
time to say farewell to Barry,
our guide throughout the tour in
India, and a man who made our
29
stay so memorable; we could not
have wished for a friendlier, more
selfless and more accomplished
person to ensure that the tour
of the Golden Triangle was so
memorable.
After 10 days in India, but
it was time to leave Delhi for the
flight to Kathmandu in Nepal. On
arrival we were met by Anup, who
was to be with us throughout
our tour, and who was a similarly positive ambassador for his
country as Barry had been in his.
Had we spent all our time in the
Shangri-la Hotel we would never
have known that Nepal is one of
the poorest countries in the world
nor that it has gone through
significant political turmoil since
one infamous Old Etonian took
it upon himself to shoot virtually all the royal family. We had a
comprehensive city tour en route
for the hotel, then it was up early
next morning to take a flight
round Everest, before returning to
the hotel for breakfast. After the
tiger and the Taj Mahal, was the
sight of Everest from above the
most magnificent memory? It is
hard to say. The visit to a temple
complex that followed, lunch in a
rooftop restaurant and then witnessing open-air cremations on a
river bank by the Pashupatinath
Temple were all equally memorable, though in very different ways.
The last morning in Nepal saw us
visit Patan and the old Newar City,
and which was followed by a trip
to the largest Buddhist temple in
the country, known prosaically as
Little Tibet.
The journey home was long.
A stop-over in Delhi gave us
the chance to eat one last, and
superb, meal in the “Line of No
Control” restaurant before sending two of our party on their way
home to Hong Kong. The rest of
us had to wait for what seemed
an eternity in the airport before
we headed off in the opposite
direction, back to London, where
we arrived early in the morning
after a thirty-hour journey.
It is impossible in such
a brief account, with so many
places and experiences necessarily omitted, to do this trip
justice. Travelling in pairs by Tuk
Tuk through crowded city traffic or being transported by cycle
rickshaw in the seemingly lawless
traffic of major cities will remain
forever in the memory as adrenalin stimulants; no risk assessment
could adequately encompass
these experiences. At the other
end of the spectrum will be the
stomach upsets experienced by
all; everyone was grateful for the
power of immodium. The sight of
poverty, unhidden on the streets,
and the beggars without number
had their own effect, but so too
did the welcome we received at
all times from all whom we met
throughout India and Nepal. My
thanks go to the boys for the high
standard of their behaviour, for
their courteousness to everyone
with whom they came into contact, and for being company that
can only be described as fun. My
thanks also go to my adult companions, Andy Copsey, Simon and
Lorraine Hearsey, Matt Holdcroft
and, last but not least, Edward,
my son and Anne, my wife and
Dame. This was a marvellous and
memorable fortnight.
31
Mental
Ben-San Lau (WFM) applauds the
most recent Eton film.
T
he glamour of Cannes,
on our front doorstep! On
Friday 15th May, the dizzying excitement of a film
premiere engulfed the Farrer
Theatre. “The first feature film
made at Eton in nearly a decade,”
the posters trumpeted, and so the
movers and shakers of the Eton
community turned out in force,
tuxedoed and ready to be entertained. Their noisy appreciation
was undeniably enthusiastic, and
Merlin Merton (writer and director) was very warmly received.
The film is inevitably coloured by the familiarity of its setting and its actors. On the other
hand, Merton’s vision of Eton is a
little foreign, ironing out our cosy
quirkiness into a more generic
‘posh boarding school’ with the
unapproachable headmaster
(ACDG-C), the stern housemaster
(ML) and the remote, ever-sosmug parents (PB and JR).
But, of course, adolescent
angst is universal, and here it
happens that Jacob Grey (Will
Hillgarth) has had enough of being institutionally prodded and
poked. He has a spectacular meltdown and flees, but even the delights of Slough do him no good;
his return to school is greeted
with hostility from all sides.
The admittedly simple
premise is given a lot of mileage,
raising issues of family, friendship, and crime and punishment. None is explored from an
especially distinctive angle, but
instead the film presents easily
recognisable situations, which
quite naturally remain on a decidedly domestic scale. Thus the
cause of Jacob’s undoing is an
evening at the local curry house,
and his day of madness consists
of treating himself to a movie and
a burger, all the while swigging
from a large bottle of wine. There
is a very credible sense of anticlimax.
As for the girlfriend (Kiki
Bagger), she appears remarkably profound, declaring that
‘parents are your life and soul’
– and she can play the piano,
too. Her relationship with Jacob is
delicately portrayed, culminating
in the excellent, whirling flashback towards the end of the film
(camerawork is the film’s greatest
strength, along with a good line
in dry humour) which crystallises
Jacob’s mental state in a skilful
bit of editing.
In contrast, Jacob’s psychological collapse is painted
with bold colours, and, in a long
sequence, he has a vast tantrum and destroys his bedroom,
even throwing a printer (cheap,
one hopes) out of the window.
His confrontation with his best
friends (David Wall and Ben
Cathcart) explodes with raw
frustration.
Despite the drama, the film
wanders somewhat, and might
have been subjected to a more
detailed editing process – there
emerges a slight tendency towards overemphasis. In addition,
the dialogue is not all first-class,
and in fact Merton’s judicious use
of silence and non-diegetic sound
contributes to the most effective
moments of the film. The actors
bring varying degrees of experience to their roles.
‘Mental’ is an ambitious
project, and Merton’s dedication
cannot be faulted. Word is that
he intends to gradually refine
his art, and we can only eagerly
await the end result. This film
certainly shows a step in the right
direction.
The production is slated for
DVD release.
33
All photos with
thanks to MGHM
Mufti Day
35
Living in America
Alex MacKeith (RDO-C) describes his
experiences of Nashville.
I
n March-April 2009, Harry
Touche, Ed Hambro Rabben and
I spent two weeks on a visit
to Montgomery Bell Academy
(MBA) in Nashville, Tennessee.
Eton had welcomed an MBA
student, Corbin Williams, for the
duration of the Lent half, and we
hoped to emulate the involvement he sustained in Eton life on
US soil. During the course of my
stay I sheltered from tornadoes,
attended the school prom and
witnessed a minor basketball riot:
it was a whistle-stop yet vigorous
taster of the times and tribulations of a typical Tennessean
teen.
MBA is comparable to Eton
in several ways: they are all-boys’
schools, private, with an emphasis on producing well-rounded,
scholarly individuals, well-placed
to become cornerstones of society
at large. Yet in the rigours of everyday student life, MBA began to
distinguish itself as an altogether
different place than its English
correspondent.
MBA students have the same
academic timetable every day,
with 50 minute classes. Lessons
fall in the same sequence from
Monday to Friday, though beginning later on a Friday (8:20am
rather than 8:00am) and delayed
by 20 minutes on a Monday and
a Wednesday after third period
assemblies. Yet it is not a mindnumbing trial akin to Groundhog
Day. I felt it asserted that there is
no ‘easy day’- such as a morning
of lenient teachers or anticipated
‘video divs’-but a consistently
high standard of academic endeavour. Homework is set every
day in each subject for the following lesson; it was bizarre that the
words ‘your homework for tomorrow is…’ were not met by instantaneous outcry and outpouring of
emotion, as at Eton. The atmosphere is work-intensive, and this
is accepted by all the students
without qualm. Yet I prefer the
Eton E.w mantra. Having been a
part of the Eton system for over
three and a half years and a part
of MBA for only two weeks, my
opinion is naturally biased. Eton
places far more emphasis on the
boy’s independent organisation of
his time and responsibilities. The
setting of work at least 2-3 days
in advance, coupled with the full
boarding nature of the school,
means that boys are able to judiciously work and relax. MBA is
not a boarding school, thus work
often extends into the home,
and due to the proximity of its
deadline, must fall into a dictated
routine. At both MBA and Eton
there is little excuse for late work,
excluding exceptional circumstances. In America homework is
generally shorter since it is due in
tomorrow; at Eton you are able to
prepare for and expected to produce work set days in advance.
At Eton, B and C block tend
to intermingle more that the
seniors and juniors of MBA. This
is in part due to Eton school
mealtimes, where the top two
years of houses eat alongside
one another both in Bekynton
and self-catering houses. This
does not occur at MBA, where
there is no house system but a
cafeteria where students are free
to sit wherever they please. Apart
from in dramatic productions, the
most recent of which was Kafka’s
Metamorphoses directed by an
Englishman abroad, Malcolm
Morrisson, the most meshing of
the top two years occurs on the
sports field.
Here MBA excels. Varsity
(1st) teams focus all their energies on winning, and thus the
best players play for the top
team. Juniors and sophomores (D
blockers) will play for the Varsity
if they are good enough and are
wholly accepted as equals by the
seniors in the team, with little
sentimentality: if a sophomore
can pass the ball better than a
senior then the sophomore is in
the team. It has regularly conquered the state in football, lacrosse, basketball and soccer, and
it trains state champions in wrestling, swimming and bowling. This
may be because MBA has a large
gym for the free use of students
in the senior school. It is big
enough for whole teams to jog in
during a training session and do
weight-training sessions at once,
under the watchful eye of two
specialist coaches. Varsity teams
can train together in the gym with
ease: the necessity of completing a set number of repetitions
or working to failure becomes
an exercise which boosts camaraderie since the trial is shared.
Furthermore, other students using
the gym see the Varsity teams
training. Every student is able to
see how hard the school’s sporting elite work day in, day out to
win state tournaments and earn
the prestige the rest of the school
shows them.
In my second assembly of
four there was a massive celebration of the school’s sporting
achievements of the previous
term. All the autumn sports were
presented by their respective
coaches with a summary of their
achievements of the season. The
captains, promising players and
most influential players were
37
publicly acknowledged and applauded for their efforts by the
whole school as they received
plaques and trophies. Thus a true
sense of appreciation pervaded
the occasion from every boy and
every member of staff, which
leads me to wonder why Eton
does not stage a similar event.
B and C blocks can easily fit into
School Hall along with masters
sitting in the rows behind the
stage. Teams should continue to
celebrate their achievements in
dinners and functions after their
seasons have ended, but this
ought not to be the limit of that
celebration. A mention of the
award of sporting colours and academic triumphs in the Chronicle
and the Head Master’s assemblies
seems to stifle our appreciation
of what our peers can do. The
event publicises and encourages
hard work, and as one of only
four remaining all-boy boarding
schools in the country, Eton and
Etonians should be aware of the
opportunity of brilliance they are
afforded.
US teenage conversations
are virtually the same as English
ones (at the standard of privilege which MBA and Eton enjoy).
Their humour is very similar to
our humour, though the South is
often so earnest that it neglects
irony, embraced by the British as
one of the key exponents of wit.
American culture has its greatest
influence over English teenagers in music and television, as
the next big thing hits across
the pond several weeks before
it makes inroads on English
YouTube screens. Yet in the South,
I was reminded that many of my
peers legally own a gun, a totally
normal yet slightly alarming prospect, and that everyone drives.
In these aspects American teens
seem more independent, brought
home to me with the awkward
realisation that at 17 I am being hurtled down a motorway by
someone a year younger than me.
In conversations with teenagers
in Nashville it became apparent
that there is a growing alcohol
and marijuana culture across
the state, the effects of which
MBA has unfortunately endured.
People spoke frankly about expulsions, though many felt that the
stupidity of those found guilty did
not illustrate the wide-ranging use
of such substances, be it experimentation or full-blown addiction,
a mindless jaunt or escapism.
The standard of academic
work I encountered at MBA was
similar to that of Eton. ACTs and
SATs, as many Etonians studying
for them will agree, are markedly
different to A levels, and MBA
takes a methodical and taskspecific approach to them which
has served them well in the past,
being one of Tennessee’s most academically elite high schools. My
studies of American history were
very similar to the standard of
history GCSE in England. English
and Theatre Studies in the USA
offer a narrower choice of textual
study and a vaguer approach to
the plays of Theatre Arts than
the English with Theatre Studies
course offered here. I studied
Virgil (Vergil) for Latin, and here
the MBA students were superb.
MBA prides itself as a classicsorientated school, and the contextual knowledge of the junior
students as well as their grasp of
vocabulary and syntax make them
worthy adversaries for the classicists of James Schools. Ancient
Greek for seniors rests at about
the standards of late D block,
since they pursue the course of
Athenazde into book II, an epic
tale which many Etonians have
encountered if not completed. It
shares the specialisation mantra
of Eton, and a certain level of
each subject must be reached before an honour course is taken up
in preferred subjects. To the three
Etonians and two Winchester
students, the consensus seemed
to be that academic standards at
Eton and Winchester are higher in
our specialised areas than those
of MBA.
The motto of MBA is the
model of the man they want
to depart from the school:
‘Gentleman, scholar, athlete’. The
school encourages students to
develop a wide range of interests
to fall under these categories, be
they artistic, academic, volunteer
work or an eventual sports scholarship to college. Excellence in
broad terms is the goal of MBA.
Eton, as I see it, is very different.
Here we are encouraged to ply
our efforts in the fields of athletics and scholarship above the
restrictions of national examinations-but only until we find our
niche. MBA wants similarity in
everyone’s well-rounded excellence. Eton intends to make you
a gentleman and depart with a
skill or unearthed talent to define
you amongst your peers, a factor
reiterated whenever the homogeny of our uniform is challenged
and defended. Yet like Eton, there
is a certain rivalry with the local
state or ‘metro’ school. The relationship can be reconciled, with a
recent Eton/Windsor Boys Colts XV
barbarian match demonstrating
a willingness to play together, an
event similar in nature to regional
basketball matches shared by private and metro schoolboys alike.
Nashville itself is a southern
town. It embraces the ‘Southern
Hospitality’ tagline, elevates fried
chicken, fried steak, biscuits and
gravy as part of its dietary heritage, and recognizes the clipped
intonation of North America as
distinct from theirs. Yet they
resist their being labelled ‘Deep
South’. Country and Western is a
global force, a contact with the
wider world seized by Nashville
yet shunned by the Deep South.
Nashville calls itself the neighbour of New York via the notoriety
of Music Row, from whose ancient, hallowed recording studios
emerged Presley, Cash and Parton
to the Big Apple. Nashville is culturally booming. Besides Country,
art house film is garnering an
audience in younger Nashvillians;
there is a recently constructed
symphony hall where I attended
a tribute to Benny Goodman, the
clarinettist ‘King of Swing’, yet
which stages acts as varied as
the Vienna Boys’ Choir to singer
Madeleine Peyroux. The Parthenon
of Nashville has stood sine 1897
and alongside its thriving body of
universities has helped to earn
Nahville the title of ‘Athens of the
South’.
Atheist or evangelical, in
Nashville you make your feelings
known. There is no awkwardness about expressing what you
believe, as I realised during my
attendance at the Baptist Church
of Nashville: the energy and
enthusiasm of the karaoke-style
hymns and total conviction of the
preacher was a sensation often
mimicked in pop culture, but
never fully captured on screen
or in parody. And not everyone
is religious. As Will, a student in
theatre arts wryly told me: ‘We’re
not all raving evangelicals over
here, you know. Don’t think that.
Some of us have seen sense.’
Nashville voted republican
(obviously I hear you cry), yet
they give valid reasons why they
voted for McCain not Obama.
McCain is an experienced hand
who has fought for his country
and endured torture for the family
values which Southerners extol.
Obama is untested in economic
policy and his bailout package is
not worker-targeted, they argue.
He seems to be an anomaly in
traditional US foreign and domestic affairs. They say Palin lost
McCain any chance of presidency,
and they are probably right. Yet
many vehemently defend George
W. Bush, insisting that he made
the best of a bad situation and affirmed America as a power which
intends to spread peace. He made
a mistake in not finishing the
task of wiping out the Taliban in
Afghanistan before placing the
military emphasis on Iraq, but
his desire and success in ending one evil regime is admirable.
Nashvillians who voted republican
also insist that they did so not
because Obama is black: that was
the last thing on their mind. I left
it at that.
Two weeks in Nashville
proved to me that I cannot imagine not living in England.
Nashville is a fantastic place,
where the standard of ice in your
drink is the topic of seasoned debate (‘We’re big on ice’, as I was
frequently told), cruising around
to the mall or the movies in a 4x4
transforms a cliché into reality,
and prom actually happens- we
have similar functions at Eton,
but prom is a formal dance and
the façade of a sprawling, messy
after-hours event, of which everyone is aware. I felt at home
due to the incredible hospitality
of my host family, the Mobleys,
the students’ willingness to move
beyond addressing me as ‘Yo,
Englishman!’ and the English accents adopted by my Literature
class: they sounded like urchins
of the 17th century, but at least
they were enjoying themselves.
39
Drawing Schools
Auer C Block
Nugent ma C Block
Burns D Block
Shaw ma B Block
Millner B Block
Montague mi C Block
1
2
3
4
Wood mi
Marano
Knight Bruce E Block
Noakes E Block
Jopling C Block
2
4
Able-Smith ma D Block
1
3
4th June Exhibition
Woolf B Block
Mr Strutt ma D Block
Codacci-Pisanelli ma D Block
Quiney KS B Block
Innes C Block
Faber C Block
Vaidyanathan E Block
Stirling OS E Block
Merriam mi F Block
41
Jayarajah F Block
Lawson min F Block
Student’s Chair
Rogers (MNF)
Shoe Cleaner
Sahotay (RJM)
Student’s Storage
Lorimer (RPDF)
Bedside Table
Toller (MAG)
Chess Table
Haughey (PBS)
Bedside Table
Nainby-Luxmore mi (CMJ)
Storage System
Bunbury ma OS (RAAC)
Shoe Rack & Seat
Abel Smith mi (NJR)
Drum Machine Racking System
Baxter mi (MJLB)
Student’s Desk
Camm (PB)
Storage System
Sandberg (PJMcK)
Television Stand
Beeching mi (IH)
Storage Device
Snowden OS (GRP)
Under bed Storage
Leung (RJM)
Desk
Bach
Laptop Stand
Keyzar (NCWS)
rage System
Desk Organiser
Bachra: KS
Bedside Table
Barakat ME (RGGP)
Computer Desk
Spicer OS MS (ASR)
Gun Cleaning Cabinet
Askew (JMN)
Shoe Storage
Astle ME (JMN)
Kitchen Storage Rack
Russell-Pavier (GRP)
Garden Tidy
Mathias ma (MJLB)
Seat & Table Unit
McAllister (NCWS)
Exercise Bracket
Redwood (DMG)
Saddle Storage
Tabor mi (MNF)
Bedside Table
W.May (PB)
GCSE Design 2009
43
and platoon attacks against the
Nab el Tan (C advanced).
The teaching aspect in the CCF
(by B blockers) was new this year
and seems to have been a success. The great advantage is that
not only do the teachers gain
experience, but they also get to
know boys in the lower blocks
which they would otherwise
not have met. This ‘inter-block’
integration has been welcomed
by both parties and represents a
positive move towards a better
social mix with the lower blocks
which is not really achieved
anywhere else apart from in the
house.
The CCF
Will Hillgarth (NJR) salutes the
efficiency of Eton’s armed forces.
T
he Eton College Combined
Cadet Force’s 149th year
has been extremely successful. It started with another group of cadets succeeding
in their Passing off Parade, and
has ended with last night’s amazing display of discipline, organisation and firepower in the Tattoo.
The CCF has been extremely
busy with more than 120 cadets
being trained over the course
year. This training involved weapons handling, field craft and a
bit of drill for those who joined
in Michaelmas (D block and C
‘standard’). They were able to apply the skills they had learnt on
three scheme weekends.
C advanced (those who joined
in D block last year) formed the
SAS section of the CCF and learnt
new, specialised skills which they
were able to use when they went
paintballing with the CCF!
B block were taught by Major
Farley about how to live in the
wild. During the Michaelmas half,
they were made to survive three
nights under the stars, out of just
a small box. After escaping from
their ‘assailants’, they spent three
nights in the woods, hiding and
surviving on whatever they were
able to scavenge, including a side
of deer which they were able to
retrieve from ‘agent X’… In the
Lent half, B block developed their
leadership skills by teaching D
block and C standard and leading
them in the Lent scheme, which
included navigation, recce patrols
CCF Adventure Training
Not only did C Advanced go
paintballing last half, but the B
blockers also went to Netheravon
Airfield, near Salisbury, to jump
out of a plane! Nine boys, accompanied by the Adjutant (Captain
Kealy, RIFLES) and Mr Jeffery
(NAEJ) spent a day learning how
to parachute and all the potential
risks involved with a static line
jump. Unfortunately, that Sunday
was too windy for us, so we returned to base, only to jump the
following week. In the end only
ten of us jumped (one injury), but
it was on such a beautiful Sunday
afternoon that it was definitely
worth the wait.
Those in the RAF section
of the Corps also have the option of flying gliders twice a year
(once in September and once in
March), with Flight Lieutenant
Scragg (JRBS). However, this does
depend on good weather (which
is generally hard to find in those
months)! Cadets fly in powered
gliders and have a 30 minute trip
which introduces them to the
effects of the controls and the
principles of flight. If they have
done some flying before then
their instructor will obviously do
something slightly more adventurous. In addition, boys can bid
to go on gliding courses over the
Easter or summer holidays. These
courses last a week and, provided
that he doesn’t crash too many
times, will finish with the cadet
flying solo for the first time.
Some members of the Corps
also went to Banff, Canada, during the Easter holidays where
they participated in a ski instructors course over the period of a
week.
Duke of Edinburgh Award
Fifty D block cadets are
working towards the Silver Duke
of Edinburgh Award under the
special supervision of Flying
Officer Russell (EJNR) and will
complete their expeditions at the
end of this half. Two expeditions
will be launched concurrently, one
in Snowdonia and the other in
the Lake District. The expeditions
are considerably more demanding than the requirements for
DoE partly because most Etonians
fulfil many of these requirements
fairly easily, but more importantly,
because it increases the test of
their leadership skills, navigation
and team work which is at the
core of the CCF.
Upon completion of their
expedition, all participants will
justifiably be proud of their
achievement which is considerable for people of their age and
experience. The self-contained
expeditions occur in some of the
UK’s harshest terrain and all participants will climb Snowdon and
Scafell Pike - the highest peaks in
Wales and England.
EJNR runs the scheme,
but receives help from Captain
Leathers (NPTL) and the
Commanding Officer (Lieutenant
Colonel Manley, PKM). Other
beaks who assist on the expeditions include Captain Stanforth
(JWFS), Dr. Moston (JM), Dr.
Edmonds (RNE), and this year
Dr. Mann (PDAM) and Mr. Tilley
(SGPT).
Summer Camps
All members of the Corps are
required to attend a camp at the
end of C block. This year’s camps
will comprise of either a domestic
45
camp in Devon, or a foreign camp
in Cyprus.
Last year’s camp to Cyprus
was a massive success with
around 25 cadets improving their
knowledge of what to expect
in the forces. They stayed in
Salamanca Barracks in Episkopi,
on the southern end of the island
and spent ten days training as
well as relaxing, after all, it is a
summer holiday.
Training included GPMG and
LMG weapons handling, advanced
patrolling and three days on the
ranges at RAF Akrotiri firing both
the machine guns mentioned
above and the SA 80-A2 (a welcomed change from the GP cadet
rifles). Cadets were able to put
into practice all they were taught
during a three day exercise in the
Cypriote hills. This began with a
long walk to the sea with weapons, webbing and water, where
they boarded a landing craft and
took a 30 minute trip to the beach
they had planned to assault. After
having successfully stormed the
enemy position, they were air
lifted to their harbour area in the
hills where they then performed
a night time ambush, night time
recce patrols and a final assault.
When the insurgents had been
terminated, the cadets were
awarded two days of relaxation
(and weapons cleaning).
Relaxation included sun bathing
on the beach, volley ball tournaments, barbeques, go-karting,
bowling, water skiing and a whole
day at the water park!
I have thoroughly enjoyed my
time in the CCF and would recommend it to anyone with or
without any military background.
I would urge anyone with any
doubts about whether to do CCF
or Social Services next year to
weigh the advantages and disadvantages based on this article:
a fair recollection about what
actually happens in the Combined
Cadet Force. As my final remark, I
would like to thank all the staff in
the CCF who have made my time
in service, as well as everyone
else’s, a first-class investment.
Barcelona
J
udged by much of our peer
group to be a one way ticket
to a gritty Spanish prison cell,
JMN B Block headed off to
Barcelona for a period of just over
24 hours. In full school dress.
All for the purpose of achieving
the greatest Leavers page ever to
have graced the Yearbook. Our
logic: a weekend in Barcelona
is “cool”, while dressing up in
fluorescent jackets with a generic
slogan from an advert for beer
isn’t.
Leaving the burning bush in
a “hot pink” limousine, complete
with the obligatory pink napkins,
which were soon used as toppocket handkerchiefs, we epitomised Etonian class. We dressed
on the basis that Barcelona would
appreciate the civilised nature of
ten teenage boys in their company. Luton airport however, did not.
Apparently we were not a very
convincing Stag party. Fortunately,
when asked if we went “to that
posh school”, our cunning plan to
save Eton from disrepute kicked
in, leaving the airport staff in the
belief that Harrow is full of rather
obnoxious little boys. Which it
probably is. Our plan when challenged individually was to claim
that we were “Bede Heren, CMJ”.
Fortunately for Bede, we behaved
ourselves.
After some initial repulsion
at the bright yellow of Ryanair,
and the astonishing discovery
that drinks had to be paid for
(“I’ve never had to do this on
BA”), we arrived in Barcelona.
Guided only by a vague recollection of this large city from a GCSE
Spanish trip, we managed to find
our way to Las Ramblas. A few
hours later, after some interesting encounters with Henrik, (the
big friendly Norwegian chap),
some Irish people (including huge
face-chin-neck merge man), and
some incredibly boring Spanish
Philosophy students, we made
our way to Razzmatazz. I think
the name tells you everything you
need to know. Although it should
be pointed out that JMN B Block
makes the claim to have dominated the platforms across the
club for the longest time ever. A
magical sight.
The strangest moment of the
trip was finding ourselves walking
across Barcelona at 7:00am, after
Henry
Charrington
(JMN) charts an
unusal trip.
Razzmatazz had shut, but at the
same time, before MacDonald’s
(the ultimate goal) had opened.
We had cleverly left our one map
back in Eton; however, we managed to find it in the end, helped
by numerous naps on park benches, and the occasional game of
football with drunken Spaniards.
After attempting to order a ‘Big
Mac’ in Spanish, we made our
way to the beach…we were swimming in the Mediterranean while
the rest of Eton was in chapel.
JMN B Block 1 – Rest of School 0.
A free 10 course lunch,
provided by a rather extravagant
little restaurant provided a bizarre
end to a completely surreal weekend. Only the hearty congratulations from Ryanair’s loudspeaker
on Joshua Montague Johnstone’s
“recent marriage” (who would
ever believe this – Ryanair, clearly) could finish off our weekend
in sufficient style. We look forward to hearing about any ‘attempts’ to emulate this weekend.
Good luck. You’ll need it.
47
Vale MJA
RDO-C
“The student of Plotinus moves
perforce in a rarefied world of
abstraction.”
(Introduction to Plotinus:
Enneads V.1 by Dr Michael
Atkinson)
A
couple of years ago,
sometime around MJA’s
100th Half at Eton, there
was a Young Enterprise
scheme to design and to market a
game of Beaks Top Trumps; each
card carried the picture of a different Beak and gave a rating out
of a hundred on a number of different categories including length
of service, academic distinction,
sporting prowess, cultural accomplishment and “legend status”.
Michael Atkinson was delighted
to give consent for his statistics
to be entered into the game – his
was one of the top cards on most
counts but he was especially
proud that he had been given the
enviable “legend rating” of 90. For
a few days he quizzed his colleagues to see if his rating could
be trumped and steadily the ego
inflated and his enthusiasm for
the game increased until, to his
irritation, he discovered that another “silver haired old smoothy
with cool young beak appeal” had
been given a 95 legend rating.
We have heard little of Beaks Top
Trumps since then. But, in spite
of the failure of the project to get
off the ground, these particular
Young Enterprisers were right
to recognise that MJA is an Eton
“legend”.
Length of Service
Top Trumps rating: 85/100
tw~| d' h!dh du/o me\n geneai\
mero&pwn a)nqrw&pwn
e0fqi/aq'... meta_ de\ trita/
toisin a!nassen.
In his time two generations of
mortal men had perished,
…and he was king in the third
generation. [translation: Lattimore]
Iliad 1.250-252
MJA has spent thirty five
years at Eton. Like Nestor in the
Iliad, this means that he has managed to live through a number of
generations of Etonians, not to
mention four Head Masters. But,
unlike Nestor, he is not one to
disparage the present by negative comparisons with the distant,
different Eton people and eras. He
has remained a positive, forwardthinker, keen to see the good in
new projects, to recognise the
quality of his younger colleagues
and to stay at the heart of school
life right up unto the end. His
enthusiasm for teaching seems
undimmed: during the last two
Easter holidays he has accompanied Classics department trips to
Italy and Greece and in this, his
last Half, he is still busy with a
full timetable, Specialist pupils,
Eton list interviews, a cricket
team and he is in charge of the
King’s Scholarship Examinations,
as he has been for ten years. How
many Beaks can boast such a full
profile?
Although he remains young
at heart, recent years have
thrown up occasions when he
has been brought to a sharp
realisation of the passing of
invida aetas: Eton list candidates
have been known to describe
their interviewer, MJA, as a
“sweet old man, a bit like Albus
Dumbledore”. Ten members of the
Classics department are young
enough to have been boys in
Michael’s house at Eton; his successor is too young to have had
the chance!
It was in 1987 that MJA
moved into Cotton Hall and
inherited from NAR a house full
of character; it did not take him
long to implant very successfully
his own individual stamp. The
genial banter, the mock explosions of anger, and the occasional
serious firework of fury were all
features of a house which ran
on strong lines of trust between
house master and boy – MJA the
house became an expression
of MJA the man. Above all, the
daily life of the house had to be
fun. Standards were there to be
maintained, whether that meant
the quality of prayers or of the
roast beef carved at your table for
Sunday lunch. There were eccentricities: quiet hour was called
‘hush-hush’. There was a larger
than life quality, and not just in
the size of the gin and tonics.
He was a huge hit with the
parents of the boys in the house,
particularly in the first ten years.
There were endless dinners in his
honour both at home and away;
one at Cotton Hall, cooked by the
doting mothers, concluded with
the presentation of a flattering
49
yet rather impressionistic portrait.
It still hangs with pride on the
wall of his Drawing Room. The
warmth of respect and affection
remains strong from the parents
and OEs who shared those Cotton
Hall years.
rework it for publication. This
commentary on Enneads II, finally
published in 1983, continues to
be quoted in footnotes of the latest works on Plotinus – Syracuse
regulars have heard Michael reading these with evident pride.
His scholarship has been
Academic Distinction
displayed to wider audiences
Top trumps rating: 95/100
with lectures on Plotinus for the
Wotton’s Society, and on Porson
dei=... th\n th=j yuxh=j ei0j to_
for the Ascham and Classical
a)ntilamba&nesqai du/namin
Societies. But, throughout his
fula&ttein kaqara_n kai\
career, colleagues and Classical
e3toimon a)kou/ein fqo&ggwn
divisions (from all blocks and
abilities) have on a daily basis
tw~n a!nw.
been treated to his academic
vigour and rare passion for ar“the soul’s power of perception
cane aspects of literary criticism,
must be kept pure and ready to
philosophy, history, grammar,
hear the sounds from above.”
philology, lyric metres and Greek
[translation: Atkinson]
Plotinus, Ennead V.1.12.17-20 accentuation.
Michael was always willing
After three years of work
to learn, even from the most unon his Doctoral dissertation on
promising sources: when asked to
Plotinus, MJA, a quondam scholar find a passive verb in a passage
of St John’s, Oxford, arrived in the of CLC, a member of nF2:7 replied:
Classics department of Eton in
“igitur, Sir”.
September 1974. There were 28
“Chirstmasarama,” exclaimed
Classicists in those days with a
MJA, “don’t be so stupid.”
clear demarcation of those who
But the scholar’s curiosity
taught exclusively in the Lower
had been ignited, and a little reSchool and those, the academic
search in learned tomes revealed,
elite, who were recruited to teach to Michael’s delight, that “igitur”
the Classical Sixth Form. Michael
was indeed an archaic passive of
always had a lower school
“ago” – the sense “it is brought
Division – with its varied diet of
about” had slipped to “therefore”
Latin, Greek, History, Divinity etc – through regular use. Michael was
but from the start he was viewed typically generous in his expresas one of the Olympian figures, a sion of gratitude to the bemused
Don manqué, inspiring the small
F blocker:
but talented groups of Greek and
“Thank you; this is the most
Latin Specialists. His status as one important thing I have learned
of the leading intellectual forces
this year.”
in the Classics department, and
Sporting Prowess
indeed the school, has remained
Top Trumps Rating: 45/100
unquestioned throughout his
career.
Michael was distraught at
In Lent 1978 he was awarded
this,
the lowest rating on his card
a Schoolmaster’s Fellowship at
– and the compilers of the game
Selwyn College, where he was
have to accept that they have
able to complete his D.Phil and
simply failed to do their research.
Throughout his career Michael has
contributed and continues to contribute in a very substantial way
to the games world of Eton.
Now he may be recognised
as one half of the most successful coaching team at Eton – the
MJA/PGW pairing with Threepenny
4; others may also associate him
with refereeing the Wall Game
or with that dreadful purple
tracksuit, a legacy of his assistance with the old Mace Sports
Summer School, which is often to
be seen in Field Game matches.
Earlier in his career, through the
70s and 80s, racket sports had
dominated Michael’s profile. He
was Master in charge of squash
for over ten years and remained
a decent player well into the later
years in his House, he was also
Master in charge of Rackets for
a short period, and continued to
play for the Beaks into the 21st
century; for many summers he
was a stalwart of the tennis world
running the U16 team. He is also
an accomplished Bridge player,
as displayed on the Greek trip
this Easter: “This may take some
playing,” he remarked, when
presented an unpromising hand
by his partner – but he won the
hand, nonetheless.
In Eton’s Byzantine world of
Committees Michael was for the
best part of two decades a very
significant voice for Games; he
served as Secretary of the Games
Committee, then Chairman for
one Half during JRC’s sabbatical. He was Chairman of the AGF
with an ex officio place on the
Development Committee. Here
he was especially significant in
influencing the decision to build
the first Astroturf and thereby giving Hockey a chance to establish
itself as a major sport.
Cultural Accomplishments
Top Trump rating: 75/100
Again, I fear, the Top Trump
men had not done their EW. Many
would argue that the beginning
of his iconic legend status, and
a key moment in establishing
his charisma as a House Master,
was his performance as Elvis/
Pharaoh in his first House play,
an ACDG-C directed performance
of the Rice/Lloyd Webber Joseph
and his Technicolor Dreamcoat.
He appeared in all the subsequent house plays – a number of
notable theatrical triumphs – in
fact there are those who wonder
whether plays were selected with
the express purpose of providing
Michael with a cameo role with
which to steal the show.
As his Elvis showed, Michael
has a fine Bass-Baritone which
has done good service in countless ECMS concerts and Chapel.
His vocal talents brought an
invitation from one of the ennobled fathers in his House to join
the Noblemen and Gentlemen’s
Catch Club, which dine and sing
six times a year in the House of
Lords. Michael is disturbingly at
home as a host in this strange
relic of the late 18th century.
Legend Status
Top trump rating: 90/100
Quand’ero paggio
Del Duca di Norfolk ero sottile,
Ero un miraggio
Vago, leggero, gentile, gentile.
Verdi/Boito, Falstaff
Act II, Part 2
The currency of “juniores
ad labores” may now be in decline, but in MJA’s youth it was
dominant and never more so
than during the bureaucracy of
Trials. On one occasion Michael
defied the system and said to the
51
formidable DPS that he had no
interest in dragging through the
tedious labour of “Mark Writing”
and, in any case he was also due
at Dinner with JSBP (Black Tie,
naturally). “I see,” replied his
senior colleague. “If that is your
attitude, you should consider
your future carefully: I fear you
will never make a Schoolmaster.”
DPS could not have been
more wrong – Michael is splendid
proof that being a School Master
is fully compatible with enjoying fine dining. It is difficult to
imagine a better dinner guest
than Michael; if he is present,
the evening is guaranteed to be
enormous fun. At times his wit
may cause sensitive souls to
blush – especially if he offers the
notorious pair of “Scouser” jokes
(they only work in a broad scouser accent).
Michael has always been a
wonderfully generous host whether in Common Lane, Cotton Hall,
1 Westons Yard, the Athenaeum
or in his home in Maristow. He
is a very accomplished cook and
likes to have people around him
– it is almost as though he runs
a small (luxury) hotel during the
school holidays so frequent are
visits from family and friends. He
has a particular skill at making
his friends’ children or his nieces
and nephews feel at ease and
happy in his company. He became
known as “Dr Cool” to Tom and
Lee Batty’s girls.
After his investiture as a
Knight of St Gregory – “ de ecclesiae reique Catholicae bono atque
incremento bene meritum” – this
may seem a little disrespectful;
“Sir Michael” may be more appropriate. For all the teasing he has
endured and his own evident willingness to laugh at the greatness
thrust upon him by Benedictus
XVI Pontifex Maximus, the honour
bestowed on Eton’s first Catholic
House Master is a significant and
distinguished acknowledgement
of an important part of Michael’s
identity. He and his family are
justifiably proud.
Tutti gabbati! Irride
L’un l’altro ogni mortal.
Ma ride ben chi ride
La risata final.
ibid Act III Part 2
A sense of fun has been a
key part of Michael’s continued
success as Beak and as a communicator with young people – his
serious commitment to scholarship and the proper fulfilment of
talent was always sugar-coated
with a healthy dose of humour
and an unlikely command of
popular culture. In the early 1980s
he had advised an earnest, young
PGCE student to “tell a few more
jokes” to help his lessons go with
more of a swing; this advice came
to haunt him twenty years later
when the former student, by this
point Head of Classics, suggested,
in an Appraisal, that “a little less
rhodomontade” might be in order.
MJA’s departure will leave a
huge hole in the Eton community
both for what he does but even
more for who he is. It is difficult
to see how Syracuse, in particular,
will be able to cope. Those of us
who have been lucky enough to
work alongside Michael teaching
Classics are all too aware that we
will not see his like again – like
one of those greater heroes of
Nestor’s youth in comparison to
whom the men of today seem distinctly inferior. We must all hope
that he visits Eton often; no doubt
there will be a steady stream of
visitors to Maristow – book early
to avoid disappointment.
Vale MAT
TFXE
A
s you sit reading this
article, the chances are
that Eton’s boys and
Masters will have had at
least 48 hours’ advance notice of
the weather that you’re currently
enjoying – courtesy of Mike Town,
Eton’s very own weather expert.
If it has been said that Eton is a
place of superlatives – then this
is certainly an apt description
of Mike. On his appointment in
1973 there could be few other
schools that had on their staff a
multiple black belt organ scholar
who simultaneously enjoyed a
reputation as one of the leading
meteorologists in the country.
Over the last 36 years Mike has
shown consistent generosity of
spirit in sharing these skills and
enthusiasms with boys and staff
alike, and Eton has been enriched
by his contribution. His particular
zest for language will be the subject of fond reminiscence for The
Old Biscuit Factory (q.v.), as Old
Etonians look back to their happy
days as miniboppers, when life
revolved around the occasional
need to submit a burnt offering,
prior to a spot of lunch at the
Eton Trough and a bout of projectile warfare in the afternoon.
In fine houses up and down the
country there’s a generation of
young men for whom cow juice
and granulated death are the
perfect accompaniment to a nice
cup of crushed beans. But while
it may have taken a little time to
adjust to Mike’s linguistic gifts,
the forceful impact of his teaching
was always immediate. His unquestioned scholarship notwithstanding, he was a tireless advocate for the cause of Geography
in the School, and took a leading
role in the establishment of the
physical geography field courses
that C-Blockers still enjoy today.
Mike’s teaching of the subject
always emphasised its relevance
53
and application in the wider
world, and his lessons (and exam
questions – he was for many
years a Principal Examiner with
OCR) were frequently brightened
by snapshots from near his home
in Cumbria or his sister’s hotel in
the Swiss Alps. His analysis of
tropical geomorphology through
the medium of early Jackie Chan
movies is part of Eton folklore.
Mike’s mastery of martial
arts is equally legendary, not least
for the 1970s incident when six
notorious members of the local
yobulace were foolish enough to
choose Mike as a target of their
japes. A whirlwind introduction
to the arts of Aikido, Judo, Karate,
Jujitsu and Cumbrian wrestling
quickly illustrated the error of
their ways.
If Mike was an early example of a ‘have-a-go hero’, he
was also a trendsetter in other
ways. When he moved into the
Hopgarden in 1984 he was one
of the youngest Masters ever to
have taken on a house, and he
was certainly the first to employ both a breathalyser unit
and a decibel meter to keep the
boys on the straight and narrow.
Members of his house quickly
found that the Hopgarden and
School rules would be applied
without exception, and that Mike
was impatient with boys who
were indolent or determined
to disrupt the harmony of the
house. The construction of a dojo
in the private side of the house
certainly made a contribution to
discipline. But he was equally
keen to celebrate success, both
of individual boys and when
the house achieved a collective victory. His genuine sense
of fun had a clear outlet when
the Hopgarden was significantly
upgraded in the 1980s – it was
his idea to bequeath to the house
its indoor football arena, which
has been a key feature for boys
in the house ever since. Above
all, Mike was a WYSIWYG sort of a
housemaster, giving to boys and
their parents the confidence of
knowing where they stood on any
issue.
Mike was also a prolific
blower of mice while at Eton,
playing for Lower Chapel, College
Chapel and Eton parish churches
over the course of 36 years. It is
no small measure of the fondness
and regard in which Mike is held
by boys whom he has taught and
tutored that over half of his 700
weddings have been for former
pupils. Not that Mike’s impact
has been limited purely to the
musical – a recent talk by Bear
Grylls left the Eton audience in no
doubt that Mike had been a profound influence on his post-Eton
adventures (he also chose him as
the prime meteorological consultant for a crossing of the Atlantic
by rubber dinghy in 2003).
Mike’s plans for retirement
are almost as frenetic as the
schedule that he keeps at Eton.
Apart from the frequent entertaining for which the Northern
Matpad is justly renowned, he
will continue his work on the
board of the Royal Meteorological
Society, volunteer as organist
to over 20 churches throughout Cumbria, and dedicate time
to matters of the local parish
and church councils. If there
is any time left over, there’s
no doubt that he and Marθa (a
fluffy beauty from the Bernese
mountains) will take to the hills
around his house and further
afield. His sound advice, expansive geographical knowledge and
increasingly mischievous sense
of humour will be missed in the
corridors of Cannon Yard schools,
and we wish him well.
The Talk of the Town
For Use in the School Room For Housemasters
BBB - Bopper Bashing Business
(teaching and training)
Bolter - stapler
Burnt Offering – homework
Chop the electrons – switch of the
electric power
Chop the photons – switch off the
lights
DBP – death by power point
Dozeybopper – prone to getting it
wrong
Eton Trough – Bekynton central
feeding unit
Evaporate & condense elsewhere
– move on to next appointment
Front paws - hands
Gravitationally challenged –
overweight, obese
Hind paws - feet
Hit by low flying lawnmower –
severe haircut
KCC (Kennel Club Cards) - order
cards
Long Snooze – half term break
Paper Coffin – waste paper basket
P&W (Pawprint & Warren) – write
your name and house on your
work
Pitstop – Chambers, mid-morning
or mid-afternoon break
Plumbing or ventilation? Stomach or repiratory problem?
PPS – Post Prandial Snooze (rest
after refuelling/meal)
Projectile Warfare – fighting with
balls (all forms of ball games)
See you in orbit - meet around
the place as our paths cross
Short snooze – weekend break
SLF - Smokelessfuel (Coke, Pepsi
etc)
Stripey paper – lined paper as in
“All striped up?”
The Old Biscuit Factory – Eton
(think penguin biscuits)
Use both brain cells - think!
Affluence of incohol – state of
a maxibopper after excess of
restaurant leave
LMMP – Life Members of the
Matpad
Macrobopper – university / college
student
Maxibopper – sixth former (C & B
block)
Mesobopper – middle school (D
block)
Minibopper – lower school (F & E
block)
Nanobopper – wet from the womb
(smallest baby)
Northern Matpad – MAT base in
Cumbria
Picobopper – baby in pram
Southern Matpad – in the Wilds
of Willowbrook, in the Suburbs of
Slough
Velocipede – pedal bike
Warren – boarding house
Warren-keeper – House Master
Etiquette
Cow Juice – milk
Crushed beans - coffee
Dead mice – tea bags
Granulated death – various types
of sugar
Hydraulic privy – loo, toilet
Postlactarian – milk in after the
tea / coffee
Prelactarian – cow juice in before
the tea
Other
Blowing the mice – playing the
organ
Grockels - tourists
Local yobulace – troublesome
local youth (yob + populace)
WW - Windows on the world
(spectacles)
Woollyback - sheep
55
Vale JR
NRFW
W
hen the young Jane
Rees, recently married
to Bill, arrived here in
1975, Eton promised
to provide a satisfactory and perhaps a quite agreeable stopgap.
Bill’s appointment as a junior
Master in the Modern Languages
Department would obviously
leave him plenty of free time to
complete his doctoral thesis at
St Catherine’s College; so how
convenient that, just an hour’s
drive down the road, Oxford was
comfortably within reach. The first
baby would be arriving in a few
months’ time; and some way up
ahead the worlds of journalism,
theatre, and perhaps academe
beckoned bright with promise.
Meanwhile, this pleasant backwater would certainly – at any rate
for two or three years – be quite a
good place to be; then, of course,
it would be time to move on to
the fulfilment of their real plans
and purposes.
But life has a way of challenging our best-laid plans. Within
a year of their arrival, Eton had
begun quietly to weave her spell
and to make her myriad claims.
Before long, perhaps at first not
even fully aware of what was
happening, Jane and Bill were enmeshed. And what a blessing for
the School it has turned out to be
that, finding themselves so unexpectedly captivated, they revised
their original intention of moving
on, and chose instead to make
Eton their home and the place of
their life’s work.
The world of school was
already familiar to Jane. Not only
had she taught, while Bill was
toiling in the Oxford libraries, at
the Henry Box School in Witney,
but – the daughter of a naval
family often on the move – she
had as a pupil attended no fewer
than thirteen schools before going
to university at Aberystwyth. It
had been there, while still undergraduates, that she and Bill had
married four years earlier.
Six months after their arrival, their daughter Eleanor duly
made her entrance. Christopher
was to follow in 1979. The new
challenges of parenthood claimed
most of Jane’s attention during
those years. But in 1980, at the
invitation of JJB, she devised and
began to teach a new and highly
successful Specialist Option, “The
Child in Society”. The course was
to run for over a decade, a steady
stream of applicants competing for places. Jane’s interest in
children was further reflected
in her role as Chairman of the
Playgroup. In addition, she
served on the Committees both
of Christian Aid and of a range
of local charities. She was also
closely involved with the National
Theatre, where she worked on a
series of marketing projects.
After a year’s exchange
which took the young family to
St Michael’s University College,
Vancouver Island, they returned
to Eton, moving to Warre House
in Michaelmas 1987. Here, as
successor to JF, Bill entered upon
his new duties as House Master.
During the ensuing fourteen years
Jane involved herself closely,
taking an active interest in the
affairs of the House, getting to
know the boys, and supporting
Bill in his demanding role. In addition, as a member of the House
Fund Committee and for five
years Chairman of the Domestic
Committee, she continued to
serve the wider community.
Such service has taken a
multitude of forms. In recent
years, she has assisted in the
work of the Admissions Office,
both by taking tours of small
boys and their parents around
the school and by interviewing eleven-year-old prospective
entrants. Many a boy now in the
school was originally interviewed
by Jane. But it is perhaps as a
teacher for twenty-six years in
the English Department that Jane
has made her most important
contribution to Eton. The classification “part-timer” does her scant
justice. She has taught in every
Block, at various points carrying the burden of a full teaching
timetable. She has taken countless groups on theatre trips. In
the schoolroom, generations of
Etonians have had the benefit
of her quick insight, her warmth
and sensitivity, her humour, her
inspiration, her unfailing kindness. Her passionate enthusiasm
for Shakespeare and the War
Poets has ignited in the mind and
heart of many a boy a love of
literature which will last him his
life through.
Jane and Bill now leave
Broadbent House for their long-established home in Exmoor, where
they already have many friends
and a busy life. In their Somerset
community Jane will undoubtedly make as full and generous
a contribution as she has done
here; nevertheless, she hopes to
have time to read widely, both
exploring new literature and
returning to such old favourites
as Emma, David Copperfield,
and Cold Comfort Farm; time to
pursue a love of music ranging
from the early medieval through
Bach, Mozart, Beethoven and
Brahms to the composers of the
early twentieth century; time to
enjoy her garden and to read to
her two-year-old grand-daughter
Olivia; time, perhaps, to attend an
occasional fixture of Tottenham
Hotspurs or of Plymouth Argyle.
Will she also find time – as she
used regularly to do – to pilot
light aircraft? She claims not, but,
given her indomitable spirit, even
this may be not altogether out of
the question.
Although no one in a community as large as Eton’s is
ultimately indispensable, Jane’s
departure will leave a gap extraordinarily difficult to fill. She and
Bill should not be surprised to
find a stream of old friends from
Eton coming knocking at the front
door in Brompton Regis.
57
Vale WHR
Jeff Branch (JJB)
I
n Michael McCrum’s Eton of
the mid seventies the winds of
intellectual and social change
were blowing vigorously. It
was no coincidence, then, that
in September 1975 William Harry
Rees, a name redolent of the
land of his fathers, was appointed to the Modern Languages
Department. Bill arrived still immersed in Oxford postgraduate
studies in contemporary French
culture, but also with a rock
guitar and an extensive cricketing
knowledge of the village greens of
Oxfordshire - that combination of
highly articulate scholarly acumen
with diverse and popular interests would prove to be one of the
hallmarks of his time at Eton, as
would a constructively combative
questioning of shibboleths. He
also brought Jane, his bride of
romantic university days, whose
own considerable contribution
to the school is acknowledged
elsewhere.
Bill had accepted the appointment perhaps more out of
curiosity than because he saw
himself as a career schoolmaster,
but it did not take long before he
and Eton recognised that he had
found his metier. The DPhil. never
was to be finished as Bill’s passion and creative energies took
root in that desire so characteristic of the best teachers : to draw
from young people more than
they thought they were capable
of achieving and to delight them
by the outcome. Amidst the later
gathering gloom of reductive
syllabi and narrowing examination
targets, Bill never lost sight of his
wholehearted commitment to the
literal meaning of ‘education’,
whether that manifested itself
in inspiring the study of French
literature or in campaigning
against considerable prejudice for
the establishment of the Learning
Centre to aid those suffering from
dyslexia and dyspraxia.
For the first twelve years of
his Eton career Bill tirelessly and
enthusiastically accepted and
celebrated the role of the assistant master. Be it an Oxbridge
group or an F division boys knew
that WHR, demanding though he
might prove, would stimulate and
would appreciate them as individuals. Those who encountered
him on the earliest university
and Brent summer schools would
be similarly fired by the sense
of mutual excitement. It was at
this time also that Bill’s contribution to Eton’s sport was notable
and to football in particular.
He coached school teams with
great success at U16A, U15A and
U14A, discovering in the process
that his acumen on the training
ground surpassed his skill as a
player. He still recalls with delight
that at the end of his first coaching season his Under 16 squad
presented him with his Colours :
he had passed an exacting test.
Bill was to spend two years as
master in charge of football,
including leading two Association
tours to Holland and Denmark. In
the summer Half he was active
on Agar’s, coaching at USB/Middle
Club level, but perhaps it was
always a slight regret that the
absence of a regular vacancy
behind the stumps for Home Park
curtailed his own playing opportunities. Bill’s other stage, literally, at this period was the Farrer
Theatre. Contemporary Etonians
perhaps take for granted the innovative, diverse and professional
nature of theatrical productions,
but it was not ever thus. Happily
for Bill, his years directing House
and School plays coincided with a
forward thinking Stage Committee
and so his desire to challenge
both boys and audience received
great encouragement. A WHR
production became renowned for
its intensity and for the fact that
Eton theatre was being pushed
in new and exciting directions.
Perhaps the apogee was to be a
monumental production of Peer
Gynt. Such a picture of drive
and commitment is incomplete :
somehow Bill found the time and
intellectual energy to put together
the much applauded Penguin
Book of French Poetry (published
in 1990). Later would come translations of Saint-Exupery’s Wind,
Sand and Stars and Flight to Arras
for Penguin Twentieth Century
Classics (published in 1995).
It was, of course, no surprise that WHR had been asked
to start a House List and in 1987,
at short notice, Bill and Jane with
their two children, Eleanor and
Christopher, moved into Warre
House. The circumstances of
the hand-over were difficult and
the House was not a happy or
united ship. As a consequence
the Rees family initally suffered
much unpleasantness. However,
Bill’s ability to understand and to
communicate sympathetically yet
firmly with young people worked
the necessary sea-change : as the
policeman became increasingly
redundant, so the House took on
the positive and civilised ethos
which WHR was eager to cultivate,
ensuring that music, drama and
the arts in general flourished. It
was a rewarding time for Bill as
he continued to coax each individual, giving unstintingly of his
time, as did Jane as boys and
beaks alike enjoyed the warmth
of Rees hospitality. The House
that WHR handed on in 2001 had
been transformed.
The years as House Master
might have been thought to be
all-consuming, but Bill’s wider
perspective continued to seek
new outlets and challenges. As
the requirements of language
teaching became more depressingly limited, Bill developed an
earlier General Studies course
in modern theatre into a full
Theatre Studies A Level, in tandem with the Director of Drama,
a post which had been instituted
a decade earlier with WHR in
59
strong support. Fresh intellectual
stimulus was released and Bill’s
frustrated creativity in the schoolroom once more found an influential channel. Also, felicitously, this
brought him into close contact
with the English Department, in
which Jane was teaching.
By natural progression Bill
became Chairman of the Stage
Committee from 1989-1998
and, until the key appointment
of Simon Dormandy in 1997,
Controller of theatre administration, finance and personnel. This
was a vital time for the well-being
of the Farrer Theatre and Eton
drama : WHR’s visionary legacy
was re-investment in the building,
modernising of the infrastructure,
and an expanded adult technical
team. With the sleight of foot typical of successful Housemasters,
WHR would slip out to the adjacent theatre to catch the flavour
of productions and to support
new directors whilst his boys
thought that he was on another
part of the corridor !
As Chairman of Governors at
St. Piran’s Bill was, almost serendipitously, to gain the valuable
and enlightening experience of
the issues of preparatory school
governance from marketing to finance and the crucial importance
of selecting the right Head. What
an excellent anticipation this was
of the final phase of Bill’s service to Eton. In 2001 WHR became
Tutor for Admissions (once journalistically described as one of
the most important offices in the
land!) and it is perhaps in this
role that he will leave the most
tangible mark upon the school.
He took over on the day that Eton
radically changed its entry system, abandoning the registering
of boys at birth. Cometh the hour,
cometh the man! WHR’s own radical liberal leanings, his experience
and his articulacy equipped him
most effectively for his task over
the next eight years. Not only
did the new system need to be
made to work, but it needed
to be explained and promoted
amongst preparatory schools,
Old Etonians and those without
prior knowledge of the school. Bill
set himself a punishing schedule of strengthening existing ties
and reaching out to schools for
whom Eton was often encircled
by obfuscating mystique. And
then there was the office work
and the large number of entry
applications in need of sensitive
and equitable individual consideration. Much has emerged to
Eton’s advantage and upon which
WHR can reflect with considerable satisfaction : the reform and
growth of bursary and scholarship
funding, the widening of access,
the much greater transparency of
the entry procedure, and the fact
that after a period of decline the
numbers of sons coming to the
school from Old Etonian families
has increased.
Bill did not expect to spend
a whole career at Eton and concedes that he has been fortunate
in that whenever he was becoming restless and in need of a
fresh challenge that challenge has
presented itself and he has risen
to it, always being so loyally assisted by Jane’s constant support.
Eton certainly has been fortunate
that he has stayed so long and
achieved so much on such a
breadth of canvas - and still looks
so youthful! We wish Bill, Jane
and their family all future contentment as they head for their
beloved Exmoor.
It is said that Nature abhors
a vacuum: she will have to labour
with special energy to replace
WHR.
Vale MJLB
TEB
W
hen Magnus arrived
from his first job at
Sherborne in 1994, he
was full of ideas and
full of energy. We all know he still
is. It’s a dynamic input into his
professional life that is distinctively his own. Whether Magnus
is an English teacher first or a
reader first doesn’t matter – what
matters for him is that books
are alive, they’re important, they
change your life.
Eton’s full of literary history,
of course, but one of his special
gifts is to bring the contemporary
into life: authors invited to LitSoc,
poets and writers in residence
performing and talking to boys
about the joys and difficulties
of writing and reading. Louis de
Bernières came to speak, postCorelli: open, edgy, emotional.
Simon Armitage was one of the
first poets-in-residence with
us, he’s an even bigger name
now. When Les Murray last
visited England (he’s Australia’s
finest living poet) Magnus organised his gig at the Windsor Arts
Centre. School’s about getting
out of school, too: hundreds of
C Block English specialists have
enjoyed their trip to Stratford; bed
and breakfast, Shakespeare 24/7.
Living in our post code makes you
vulnerable to Betjeman’s bombs,
but the countryside is alive from
Slough to Stoke Poges churchyard,
to Milton’s Chilterns (sounds
awful, looks great). You can’t go
on a walk with Magnus without
finding out about these things
– couldn’t avoid it in one of his
divisions or tutor groups either.
Take a step further, and try the
latest things: post-colonial texts,
now there’s an education. It’s
not just what you think, it’s how
you say it, too. That’s what it has
always been about in the schoolroom, because Magnus is not a
maverick, he’s a top class schoolmaster. He won’t let the easy get
in the way of the important. Sure,
the image is pretty upfront: the
black Labrador and the Volvo, for
goodness’ sake, but it has always
has been misleading. Come from
Sherborne and coach football? His
favourite season, 1999, his U14B
were p12 w12. A sound defence,
perhaps, based on his own
elegant performances alongside
Jean-Paul Dubois for the beaks’
long-departed Friday team. The
Upper Sixpenny B and the XXXIII
shared his passion for cricket, but
few would also have been oarsmen. Wisden Cricket Monthly and
Rowing and Regatta in the same
house, there’s no stereotyping to
be done here, and woe betide any
F blocker caught playing computer games. As a House Master,
Magnus is keen for his boys to be
active and engaged. He promotes
tolerance, won’t stand for unkindness, builds and maintains positive relationships with the boys.
Straightforward values, energetically pursued, with a touch of the
magic formula that makes things
stick. His boys respect ‘Bash’,
and you can’t do better than that.
His new job at Stowe, as Deputy
Head, (pupil and staff welfare,
admissions), is going to be a
challenge. I’m convinced he’ll
be a success; he’s not going on
his own, after all: you can’t talk
about Magnus’ life without talking
about Camilla – strong, friendly,
charming. She’s made her own
successful career in the NHS, and
is a world expert in the work-life
balance.
61
Vale RF
RMS
I
t gives me great pleasure
to have the honour of writing a Vale for RF, a wonderful
schoolmaster, who still has the
energy and enthusiasm that many
a younger man would be happy
to have.
Roddy is a first class natural
historian and great enthusiast
for what he would describe as
real biology. So much so that he
shunned a conventional university career for a while after
school in order to work outdoors
in forestry before finally deciding to take up a place at Royal
Holloway College London gaining
a first class honours degree in
Biology. Following this he went on
to do the research for his Ph.D.
in freshwater ecology but, alas,
his thesis never saw the light of
day and there is still a good deal
of number crunching to do if, as
he always told me he would, he
finally returns to it. Perhaps now
is the time to dust off those old
folders once again and put pen
to paper! However, his time was,
perhaps, far better spent courting
and marrying a beautiful young
Italian historian, Gianna, who
first caught his eye at a Christian
Union wine and cheese party.
Roddy assures me that he only
went along to fill up with cheese
in those penniless student days
but it turned out to be probably
the best decision of his life.
His appointment to Eton in
1974 quickly brought an end to
those idyllic student days but
with the characteristic determination and stamina of a man who,
until recently, was running the
marathon in times most of us
could only dream of he quickly
established himself at Eton as
a force to reckon with. In the
schoolroom he was an immediate hit breathing new life into
the Biology Department at a
time when the subject was really becoming a central pillar of
scientific advance. He was and is
a great motivator with a genuine
and deep understanding of biology possessing an innate grasp of
how to communicate with young
people. However, his interests
and expertise in other areas are
eclectic and having spent two
years coaching rugby (perhaps
not the best use of his talent) he
quickly moved into leading some
notable mountaineering and seakayaking expeditions in addition
to reorganising the Natural History
Museum running the Natural
History Society, Photographic
Society and the Eton Film Unit;
creating some fine work when
things were much more difficult
to produce than they are now in
this digital age.
Clearly it would not be long
before a man with such talent
was to be offered the Head of
Biology and he played a major
role in driving the department
forward galvanising the resources
available to him into a most efficient, successful and exciting
unit. It was to my great fortune
that he thought that the department could do with a young
post-doctoral neurobiologist and
my meeting with Roddy convinced
me that Eton would be an exciting
place to live and work.
During this time as Head of
Biology he jointly oversaw the
development of one of the first
great Eton departmental building
projects battling some considerable technical challenges and
indeed political challenges to
complete it. He was one of the
first to exploit computing technology in the schoolroom and made
more inventive use of a BBC
computer than one would have
imagined possible.
In 1984 he was called upon,
rather earlier than expected, to
take up his House after the sad
death of Martin Whiteley on the
Field Game Pitch. It was perhaps
fitting that with characteristic
enthusiasm Roddy took up the
game both playing and umpiring driving the green and whites
on to success. Roddy is a kind
and caring man who in addition
to being a fine father to his own
children fulfilled a similar role, in
loco parentis, for 13 years running
a House in which each boy felt
that they had someone who really
would support them through thick
and thin and I know that they are
still enormously grateful to him.
Throughout this time Roddy
continued to develop his teaching
and was always at the forefront
of new ideas in the department.
He is of course deeply offended
by sloppy thinking and cannot
abide ill considered criticism of
Darwinism. If Darwin had ever
needed a bulldog to fit into
Huxley’s shoes Roddy would have
been his man.
Having got to the end of
an exhausting time running his
House there had to be an outlet
for his boundless energy. The long
wind down into retirement was
not for him and he took on, with
great enthusiasm, the running
of Teaching Resources and was
much involved with the development of IT at Eton taking on the
task of galvanising the computing
pioneers to try out the technology
first and make suggestions for
the future. Latterly he embraced
the task of running the Yearbook
and has produced a colour photographic record of immense value
to the College.
There can be no doubt that
Roddy will miss Eton and that
we will miss such a tornado of
educational enthusiasm. We all
wish Roddy and Gianna a very
happy and long retirement in
Sunningdale.
63
Vale JBW
RA
I
first knew Jim when I was at
Uppingham. Having appointed
him because he clearly had
the necessary musicianship,
spirit and rapport in abundance,
I asked him, for the record, what
his paper qualifications were.
There followed the only silence
I’ve ever known in conversations
with Jim. He had left all educational institutions a bit early, impatient to get on with playing the
trombone. He had hardly arrived
at the Royal Manchester College
of Music aged 16 before he was
flown out to join Sir John Barbirolli
and the Halle orchestra after the
first trombonist fell sick. Then he
found himself principal trombone
with the BBC Scottish Symphony
Orchestra, performing several
trombone concertos for Radio 3,
and all this before he was 19.
The cornet was the instrument
he had started on, aged 8, in the
Loughborough Town Band, but
when he was 15 he swapped his
cornet for a trombone, and two
weeks later auditioned and joined
the National Youth Orchestra.
Because of his start with valves
he would sometimes be called on
to play the euphonium when it
was needed orchestrally, in The
Planets, for example, or even the
exotic bass trumpet in the Rite of
Spring. He was also trombonist
with the Gabrieli Brass quintet.
This wide experience is an essential part of his teaching skill, and
when combined with his rapport,
makes him a formidable teacher.
Having played for so many conductors (including Sargent, Boult,
Previn and Rattle) he knows what
players look for in a conductor, so
his own conducting is a model of
straightforward clarity. His principle when rehearsing and conducting is often to leave points for
players to sort out themselves, a
trust which is much appreciated.
After working as a freelance musician he took a twoyear break to work with horses
before returning to the Hallé in
1975 (where he met and married Alison) and then to the BBC
Scottish Radio Band in Scotland,
working mainly in Television and
Radio with Shirley Bassey, Rod
Stewart, Diana Ross and his all
time favourite, Ella Fitzgerald. His
no-nonsense good humour has
always endeared him to pupils,
and a very large number keep
in touch with him for years after
leaving. This approach had made
him, in 1980, the obvious choice
to represent the BBC musicians in
Scotland in negotiations between
the Musicians’ Union and the
BBC. Twelve weeks on a picket
line alongside such eminent musicians as Sir Charles Groves, Sir
Simon Rattle, Sir Alexander Gibson
and many others did eventually
take its toll on Jim, as it did many
other musicians, and he started
to look for a way of earning a
living away from playing. Thus
Uppingham’s and then Eton’s
great good fortune.
He has immersed himself
in so many aspects of Eton’s life
when he arrived, and he didn’t
hang about. Having been a featured jazz soloist with the BBC he
formed the Eton College Big Band
along with smaller jazz ensembles. One of his groups won the
Daily Telegraph’s Jazz Competition
for young musicians. The Rock
Society started to flourish and Jim
always championed their cause,
asking for more amps, drum kits
and rehearsal rooms. It was his
constant nagging that enabled the
Rock Society to enjoy the wonderful facilities on offer. He immersed
himself in technology and spent
the whole of the summer holidays of 1999 (much to his family’s
chagrin!) preparing for the opening of the New Music Schools.
He oversaw the setting up of the
recording studio and the computer rooms, and organized how
this brand new subject would be
taught. He took on the mantle of
Head of Music Technology and
for several years taught all new
boys in F Block how to reproduce
Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean”.
It was only when the Head of
Wind became vacant ten years
later that he suggested we appoint a full time Head of Music
Technology and that he should
step down and acquire the woodwind section in addition to the
brass, pipes and percussion.
As well as being musical director for Joseph and his
Technicolor Dreamcoat, West Side
Story, Guy’s and Dolls, Nicholas
Nickleby, Oh What a Lovely War,
My Fair Lady and Jesus Christ
Superstar in the Farrer Theatre
he played football and cricket
for the beaks and coached various teams. At one time he even
topped the bowling averages
for Home Park earning him the
nickname “Wortley Ambrose”.
He was Master in Charge of
Equestrianism and Ferrets and ran
the Eventing Teams for 10 years.
There were many successes, the
most memorable winning the
Queen’s Plate for Show Jumping
at the Windsor Horse Show during
Her Majesty’s Jubilee Year with
the Queen presenting the Plate
and the rosettes. Outside Eton he
is still held in great affection by
the brass-playing world. He has
written incidental music for BBC
TV and coaches for the National
Schools Symphony Orchestra, as
well as lecturing, conducting and
teaching both here and in the
United States.
Jim has human sympathy
in abundance, and that is what
makes him so popular with all the
visiting teachers in his department. He’s a great supporter of
whomever he perceives to be the
underdog or the weaker party in
any situation. He leaves after 23
years and, apart from his immense musical contribution, we
shall miss his ready humour, his
infectious laugh and his warmth.
Jim’s own response: “It’s small
wonder that I go around with
a smile on my face - it’s a very
satisfying and rewarding way of
earning a living!”
65
James Poston (MJP) inveighs against the
evils of cotton wool.
I
t was a subdued Mufti Day this
year. Of course, there was the
odd gingerbread man fleeing
from an irate chef, and the
occasional disquieting man-sized
rabbit, but on the whole the
crazed brilliance of Eton Mufti Day
was lacking. Why? It’s possible
that the costume void was due to
a nose-dive of the Etonian imagination, and that originality has
faded from our ranks. However,
it might be argued that such a
dearth of effort was instead the
product of one little – but vital
– rule.
Such minute rules are slowly
beginning to pervade our lives.
Amid the international perils of
terrorism, climate change and the
credit crunch, a more insidious
threat is constricting us; the force
of Health and Safety and its counterpart of Political Correctness.
Wherever they go, it seems a
plague of petty rules follows
after, gradually eroding any use
of common sense and building
mindless bureaucracy. Most concerning, though, is that whereas
the presence of this spectre was
formerly only notable in newspaper stories, it now seems to have
inserted itself into the fabric of
our school life and rules.
Go to the back pages of fixtures (skimming over the peculiarities of the Bomb Procedure),
and prefacing the main school
rules one finds the following
sentence: “There is one overriding
principle: that boys should use
good sense and treat all members of the community fairly and
decently”. But I cannot help but
feel that it is over this “overriding
principle” that Eton has stumbled
over the last few years. To require
that we use “good sense” is not
only to assume that we have that
faculty, but to respect our ability
to use it. Pondering over why we
were not permitted to go in mufti
dress to congregational practice,
it was concluded that the reason
was fear of grossly inappropriate
outfits; thus delaying the costumes until Chambers negated
any possibility of impropriety. But
surely we should be given the
chance to exercise “good reason”
before it is forcibly removed from
us? By all means, rebuke us if
we go amiss, but to assume us
guilty before we have the chance
to do anything at all seems to
Boyspeak
undermine any rule system that
we have.
The worrying matter is, this
is not the only example of a low
estimation of our “good sense”. A
few years ago, a delightful idiosyncrasy of Eton – the rip – was
stripped of its distinctive quality.
Lest they traumatise young boys
with the physical tearing of their
work, masters should now apparently merely write “rip” on the
offending article. This cotton-wool
cocoon is repeated in the policy
for the Ascension Day service;
everything must be done “so that
safety requirements are met” – a
phrase which now pollutes our
lives. Hence, whereas the service
previously offered an exceedingly
rare opportunity for senior boys
to venture onto the roof, now the
privilege is confined to members
of the choir and the Wall Game
teams.
It seems to me that many of
these new rules are simply the
result of fear, a fear which permeates our culture. The Ascension
Day service is limited, for fear of
someone slipping on a crowded
roof. British Bulldog is prohibited,
for fear someone will be injured.
Peanut packets are emblazoned
with warnings of “may contain
nuts”, for fear that someone will
be too stupid to realise this fact.
In the immortal words of the
Shawshank Redemption, “fear
can hold you prisoner” – and
truer words were never spoken.
Today, everyone is held ransom
by the possibility of lawsuits
which may emerge due to an apparent slight. We have created a
sword of Damocles which hangs
over our heads in the form of
parental complaint, legal action,
or redundancy. As this fear tightens its hold, any vitality of life
slips away. Good-natured fun is
quashed, outspoken opinions are
hushed, and impulsive risks are
curbed, to create a uniformity
which in its apparent perfection
will drain our lives dry.
When he first arrived, Lord
Waldegrave stated his intent for
his time as Provost of Eton; to
ensure that Eton remains one
of the foremost schools in the
country, known throughout the
world for its first-rate education.
It goes without saying that education is more than exam grades; it
seems to me that Eton, so long a
stronghold of tradition and idiosyncrasy, must become a bastion
against the new zeitgeist of fear.
Risks must be taken, if we are to
lead authentic lives. If the school
requests that we act by our “good
sense”, it should afford us the
trust to use it – yet how will we
have the chance to do that if we
are constantly constrained by the
fear that we will misbehave? Of
course, the school must maintain
good discipline. But punish us
after an infringement – do not
punish us in advance, by installing restrictions on the assumption
that we would offend if they were
not in place. One might argue
that this is a false idealism, and
that boys will always offend; but
discipline which trusts and punishes betrayal of that trust will
always be higher than discipline
which reduces boys to criminals
before they ever act. So let us
restore the contract of trust. Let
Eton become an exemplar to all
society, by having the courage to
remove the chains of cotton wool,
and allow us to use our “good
sense”.
67
Editors:
Daryl Cheng
Jack Straker
Alex Wright
master-in-charge:
gdm
literary advisor:
mja
With thanks to:
george quiney, Justin Chan,
mghm, Crispin Royle-Davies.
Cover photos:
Justin Chan
Opinions expressed in The
Chronicle do not necessarily reflect official school
sentiment.

No. 4091 - Eton College

Transcription

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