Aqila - Headington School
Transcription
Aqila - Headington School
AQ I L A HEADINGTON HOTSPOT PRESENTS... BABIES NOT BARBIES The terrifying world of child beauty pageants. GIRLS WILL...BE GIRLS But do boys have to play soldier? BEING A DISNEY PRINCESS Every girl’s dream...and their mother’s. Foreword: As Helen Keller once said, ‘alone we can do so little; together we can do so much’. This magazine is a testament to this, as every single line of text, every drawing and every photograph was painstakingly crafted by our team of students. We could not have produced anything remotely as wonderful and fantastic as Aqila without the awe-inspiring combination of skill, talent and knowledge among the members of our group. We motivated each other, put our heads together to conquer the obstacles and in the end, we succeeded together. We stand as living proof of the main message presented in Aqila: that girls, women, have the power to do anything when united for one cause and liberated from the restraints of discriminatory stereotypes. To many, this magazine acted as a tool for self-reflection, a chance to contemplate our own actions and roles in society. Our deep soul searching led to one answer: gender inequality is still highly prominent in our society ... and we can do something about it. Thus, Aqila Magazine was born. The name of our magazine, Aqila, is a girl’s name derived from the Arabic word for ‘wisdom’. The title reflects the message of our magazine: women have the wisdom and strength to fight for our half of the world. The diversity of our team meant that we had the unique opportunity to explore and investigate women’s rights across the globe, as students of different ages and nationalities wrote about their own homes and communities. Fundraising events organised by members of our group helped to raise over £300 in donations for WomanKind, a charity that supports women in Third World Countries by providing education, shelter and counselling. Although we were all lucky enough to grow up in developed and modern environments that allowed for opporunities and freedom for women, we cannot forget our sisters who are less fortunate. Therefore, this magazine is ultimately a tribute to their fight and an acknowledgement of the part we all must play in order to make a difference. Christy Flora Au Editor-in-Chief 1 THE GENDER STEREOTYPE 5 GIRLS WILL...BE GIRLS 11 NETBALL...FOR MEN? 15 AN ANCESTRAL JOURNEY 19 TO BE GRATEFUL 23 UNITED AS ONE 26 OUR HALF OF THE WORLD 28 THE GIRLS OF OUR HOME 31 BOLLYWOOD 37 BABIES NOT BARBIES 41 MA AND DAUGHTER TALK 45 BEING A DISNEY PRINCESS 1 The Gender Stereotype Caitlin Burns I was brought up differently. Most parents tended to focus on making sure their little girls all liked dresses and the colour pink, spoiling them with makeup and Barbie dolls to fulfill all their fantasies. I knew quite a few of these girls and every so often I was invited to play with their dolls, to host an imaginary tea party, and to dance for the fairy queen when she came to visit. Switching ballet for football, makeup for toy cars, and skirts for trousers, I forged my own path, in spite of the feminine stereotype that society had set up for me. My single-minded approach towards the world prompted a combined effort from my family to open my eyes to the other side of the spectrum: my father tried to push me into glittery frocks and my mother encouraged more female-orientated activities. They feared that bullying would result from my preferences, the cruelty of children channelled towards the ‘different one’. 2 ‘Kids will be kids’ … a metaphorical phrase used to excuse inexcusable children and reveal the actual opinions and influences of the parental unit. Our society preaches the politically correct mantra of young people forging their own paths; yet, there are seemingly immutable barriers that stand between these children and what they love. The glitter thrown in our eyes still cannot conceal the fact that the social pressures to conform are glaringly obvious. Politicians may point out that there are male ballet dancers and female engineers; yes, but that does not do justice to the opposition they had to overcome, just because of their gender. The pride in the dancer’s steps is not just confidence in his own ability, but a combination of his training and the constant struggle he faces to get where he is today. Society sets up social norms that parents force their children to adhere to. I was taught to always be myself, that it wasn’t wrong for me 3 to like something that the toy shop had labelled as ‘boys only’. However, some children are faced with harsh words from their parents - ‘don’t play with that George - it’s for girls.’ They grow up with the voices bouncing around their skulls, forcing them to walk to the other end of the store and pick up something they don’t want, fake smiles not reaching their eyes when they play with their presents, trying to force themselves to like it because that’s what ‘all little girls play with.’ The problem of gender stereotyping escalates even further when the education system is taken into question. Schools providing single-sex education constantly exclude subjects not deemed the gender norm, outrightly assuming that nobody would want to study subjects that deviate from their assigned ‘path’. For example, boys’ schools may place less emphasis on the arts or textiles, while subjects like Physics take prevalence. Some subjects, such as the STEM curriculum for girls and technology, are slowly catching on as the stigma of computing or chemistry being a ‘boys only’ subject is fading away. However, STEM subjects are still, statistically, male dominated, which often deters girls from taking that career path. Who wants to be the odd one out? The idea that a certain gender is better for a specific job stems from a traditionalist view that prevents the new generation from fully stretching theirs wings. It is not our place to limit the potential of others, only to encourage and support. The idealistic rose-tinted glasses must come off: equality is still a far away dream, albeit slightly closer than before. Let’s practice what we preach and stop the gender stereotype. 4 GIRLS WILL. ...BE GIRLS Tamsin Rodgers It begins with the word ‘ladylike’. We are taught to stand up straight, to smile daintily, to be charming and composed and unfailingly polite. Scuffed shoes and scraped knees are for little boys rough-housing on the playground, while we are confined to pigs’ tails and skipping ropes and knee socks. We have all, at some point in our lives, been pigeon-holed; fit into neat little boxes that feel more like prison cells, the roles of our gender dictated to us rather than defined by us. If not by our parents then by our schools, and if not by our schools then by the media; we are spoon fed toxic gender norms from the outset. Our own gender identities are taken from us and sold back to us in the form of stunted stereotypes. Little boys play soldiers whilst little girls play mother to a doll, and everything is colour coded; we live in a world of pink and blue, as if no one has ever heard of purple. In response to this there have 7 been many campaigns such as that of ‘Let Toys Be Toys’. This was was set up in 2012 and works towards dismantling the gender divide obvious in the marketing of toys to children in the hope of freeing young children from the pressure that they feel to conform to the ‘traditional’ (or, in other words, outdated and sexist) gender roles that their own toys impose upon them. Growing up, I was taught that femininity was synonymous to passiveness, to coming second place and being all blunt edges. I had to be sweeter, quieter, was assumed to be weaker, somehow less sharp than my male playmates. Boys would be boys, and I would be ladylike, and all was as it should be. The issue with this, though, is that, not all little boys want to play soldier. The phrase ‘boys will be boys’ is used to excuse the inexcusable: the unruly behaviour, the untempered anger, and later, unapologetic objectification of women. This phrase is used to generalise and stereotype, perpetuating the warped idea of masculinity that if boys are not tyrants in toddlers’ shoes, if they are not brimming with barely contained rage, then they do not qualify as boys. They do not qualify as men. They are weak, they are ‘girlish’, they are somehow less. So boys will be boys and girls will be ridiculed. Boys will be boys and girls will be objectified. And maybe I’m not a whirlwind of white knuckled rage, but I’m no wilting flower, either. thing they’re not. I hope for a world where boys will be boys, girls will be girls and we will all be whoever we want to be, and it is our job to be proactive and work towards such a future. Now, I can say that I am finally learning that my femininity isn’t defined by what society thinks I should be, or the adverts I see on TV; it’s not defined by the clothes I wear or my hobbies or the career I’m aiming for. I define myself, and my femininity doesn’t have to define me if I don’t want it to. The ideal world is a unisex utopia, with little girls free to play soldier and little boys free to wear pink, with no one ever expecting them to be any- 8 9 10 11 Netball...for men? Rachael Palmer When someone asks you to name an English cricket or football player, do you only conjure up the names of the men that play? Does Wayne Rooney or Freddy Flintoff roll off your tongue? I’ll take a guess that at least one Manchester United icon you had in mind was a man. Same goes for a different sport ... netball. Can you name any great players? In my opinion, it would have to be Pam Cookey, but that question isn’t a fair one as netball is only played by women. So, is the game of netball considered sexist as men aren’t featured in the game? What about rowing? Name two top rowers from the Olympics. Most people are able to name a male and female rower immediately. Cultural upbringing played a part for them as athletes and maybe us too - the consequence of media exposure of our very own representatives in the Olympics. Now consider how your family lifestyle defines your cultural upbringing where women are concerned in sport. Were you only exposed to the sports 12 that your parents considered were appropriate for your gender? Maybe ballet for girls or something more ‘laddish’ with dad? I’m pleased to say that my parents were open to any participation in sport. ‘Have a go and see what you like,’ they said. This included tag rugby and cricket. Across the world we are culturally different. This has the impact of individual points of view. Different cultures have different childhoods, and added to that are the variations in our ‘parental beliefs’ and ‘parental behaviours’. For instance, my mother, although relaxed about activities and aspirations she exposed me to, joked with us when we were small that football was poisonous! Somewhere deep in the back of my mind her influence has tarnished my outlook on Rugby... is a woman really anatomically built for the real game of rugby? Or am I relying on my biology lessons knowing there are very physical differences between males and females? 13 The cause and effect of how one perceives a woman is often documented in those self-help books, ‘Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars’, listing our differences. Or is it just plain common sense of nature and nurture? Taking a look into history, adults and children had a role to play and their sex defined those roles. My great-greatgrandmother was expected to look after her five children. It was always the daughters who did the housework type of chores never the sons. Each were given defined roles and expectations of their future employment based on their gender. Her sons went to war and her daughters were aiming at being in service as scullery maids. The girls weren’t expected to fight. My great-grandmother started off her teenage years alongside a housekeeper. She was expected to be able to cook and carry out all of the household chores. Losing her husband during World War II, she set her sights slightly higher than her own for her daughter - my grandmother. She attended grammar school and trained in accountancy. Thankfully in most situations our upbringing evolves through time. When I was eleven I was concentrating on going into my next school. At sixteen, I was able to discuss with my parents my choice of sixth form and future career... avoiding being a scullery maid. Till this day, there are still certain cultures that believe men are more useful and ntelligent than women. We only have to look at the statistics for female foetal abortions, the denial of education for girls, female trafficking and forced teenage marriages to see this still exists. drive to work as a human rights lawyer whilst my husband drops off the children at school. Gender stereotypes are becoming arbitrary and it is time that the world realised this as well. In the 1980s, the sex discrimination act was formed and the choices were therefore opened for women with the law to support them. Our upbringing is shaped by what went before us and I will look forward to being able to drive a car in the future; first in the UK and then maybe one day in Saudi Arabia as I 14 15 An Ancestral Journey Sasha Liwicki Many people are unaware of Southeast Asian history in the Western world, although much of it was under colonial rule 200 years ago. It is perceived as so far removed, so exotic, as to be almost irrelevant to our current affairs. Consequently, people from Southeast Asia remain unacknowledged and in the periphery. However, due to ever increasing globalisation and the concept of decreasing space, there is a growing need to understand this society and its customs. My grandma was born in Malaya, now known as Malaysia (and Singapore) in 1933 into a middle class, well-off family. However, she was an immediate disappointment because she was a girl. In fact, she was the second youngest of four sisters and two brothers, and the boys were the “precious” children in this traditional Chinese family. During the early years of her life she was dressed as a boy, her hair cut short and she felt that wearing baggy masculine clothes was a mark of her failure. She very rarely talks about her childhood and I get 16 the impression that it wasn’t completely joyful. My grandma lived in a time of change, not only for women’s rights, but also for the political leaders and governments of her homeland. She was born under British rule, but Malaya had been a British colony since 1826. By 1922, Singapore, at its southern tip, had been transformed from a sleepy backwater into the main British naval base and trading port in East Asia. As a young child , she was heavily influenced by Chinese and Malay superstitions garnered from her parents and nanny. She carried this strong sense of the supernatural with her into adulthood. Until the age of 15 she was educated in Malay and English. Unlike Chinese women before her, however, she attended school but it was a very basic level of education and greatly reflected the style of education of the Victorian era. She was very shy as a young girl and would often find herself in the corner wearing a dunce hat. To make 17 matters worse she idolised her elder sister, who was a lot more vivacious and cunning, which led to her taking the rap for many joint misdemeanours. Caning was a common punishment. It was then, and still is now, perfectly normal for parents to choose favourites. Her elder sister was a favourite of her mother’s, but ultimately the boys always came first. During that period a girl’s education focused on knowledge rather than mental wellbeing. Outside her school life, she and her sisters were taught how to run a household and how to cook in the proper Malay style. Hours would be spent preparing food: tailing beansprouts, and folding “ghost money” for festivals. Their kitchen was still protected by kitchen gods and they were Taoists. She then spent some years in England continuing a secondary education seen as the best in the world, but she never went to university as it was not a necessity for a girl, which just goes to show how far humanity and gender equality have come. Perhaps the most dramatic period in my grandma’s life was in 1941, when the Japanese invaded Malaya during World War One. The Japanese wished to purify the country of anyone who was deemed to be anti-Japanese as a result, 25 000 to 50 000 people were killed. Many more were tortured, and food was scarce. My grandmother was living in Kuala Lumpur at the time of the invasion and tried to travel down to Singapore before it fell, in a desperate attempt to keep safe. It was a torturous journey and she and her family were turned back without any hope or security. In the years that followed the end of the war and the 1957 British handover, the young Chinese Lee Kuan Yew was a politician growing in popularity, but the Malaydominated government was opposed to him and the force of the large Chinese minority. Therefore an independent, mainly Chinese Singapore was forced out of Malaya in 1965. During this time my grandmother met my grandad, and she says she married him because he was a doctor and would look after her well. His family was well respected. It was a pragmatic love match on her side - quite a novelty as arranged marriages were still common. Her two eldest sisters both had arranged marriages as it was important to maintain one’s social standing by appropriate intermarriages. Under the hand of Lee Kuan Yew, Singapore flourished as a cosmopolitan city with great diversity. Till this day, it is still considered on of the most developed and forwardthinking countries in the world. In the present day, you can see Singapore’s past resonating in the architecture, people and language, especially illuminating the journey women in Malay-Singaporean culture have had to undertake to reach the position they are in now. 18 To 19 Be Grateful Sabrina Siu When I look back on the rather privileged childhood I had, I realise that when considering this question we must take into account the marked difference between society’s expectations of children in the past and nowadays. If I had been born a few decades earlier, higher education would not have been mandatory and I would have been expected to work from around the age of 12, to help support my family and essentially, to ‘earn my keep’. I was fortunate enough to be born around the turn of the 21st century, at a time of considerable societal and cultural change, and so I am not automatically faced with such expectations. There are so many 20 different cultures around the world, meaning that different people have always had various opinions on young girls and women, and their role in society; in some traditions women have been perceived as weak, docile members of society that exist only to obey their male counterparts. This view dates back to, and even precedes, the classical period, when a woman’s sole contribution to society was to marry and produce a male heir to inherit her husband’s estate. Not only did this influence and dominate a large part of European and indeed, Asian, culture, for much of recorded history, this orthodox view of women still exists in some parts of society today. My parents are Chinese, and I have been brought up in a culture that to this day, continues to value male offspring much more than female ones. China’s one-child policy, which was put into effect during the late 1970s, has been the main culprit of the Chinese population’s skewed demographic. 21 China has always been a distinctly patriarchal society, and the enforcement of this policy led to the increase of sex-selective abortion or, in some cases, infanticide. The desire to conceive a son to carry on the family name is deeply rooted in our tradition, and this, along with China’s attempt at population control, is how it came to be embedded in the Chinese psyche to favour male infants and frown upon female births. This means that from the very moment of birth, women in my culture are faced with a major challenge: to prove that we should be valued and respected just as much as men are. Women have always been perceived as housewives and mothers: throughout Chinese history, men have always been the workers upon whose income the entire family depended in order to survive. While that may have been true up to the mid-1900s, it is no longer the case. Today, there are many women in our culture who have shown that they are perfectly capable of handling motherhood and full-time employment. This change in view can, I believe, be attributed largely to rapidly growing industries and the spreading of European culture. The Second World War spanned six years and required a huge amount of ammunition and supplies, resulting in crippled economies. By 1945, industries were failing to keep up with the rapid demand for arms and, with most of the men fighting on the front, German women were made to register for work, contradicting previous Nazi teachings that a woman’s place was in the house with her children. As a result, when it was shown that women were equally, if not more, capable than men, there came the gradual integration of women into other professions during the latter half of the 20th century. Germany, I would have had as many genetically pure child as I could; if I had been born in 1970s China, I might have been cast out of my family for not being the son they wanted. But, I was born at the turn of the century, at a time of social change, at a time when, for the first time in history, men and women are being seen by most as equals, and for that, I am eternally grateful. The crux of the matter, then, is this: if I had been born in ancient Greece, I would have spent my days weaving at the loom; if I had been born in Nazi 22 ** The calabash (urn) and the coral beads are traditional Nigerian symbols for marriage. 23 United as One Lotta chukwu Ilukwe ‘Sit straight, chin up, remember to smile, but do not speak unless spoken to...’ said Anwulika’s autocratic father, Mazi Okoye. Anwulika is a young, dark-skinned beauty from the Imo State of Nigeria. Born into an influential family, she receives only the best from her parents during her childhood. She goes to the best schools, has holidays all over the world and is even given private piano lessons. Not many in Nigeria grow up with such opportunities. Anwulika is very bright, dreaming of becoming an architect and one day building the 8th Wonder of the World. But then something happens - reality. ‘... be very polite and make sure you kneel to greet Chief Okonji. I want today to go perfectly so that we can marry you off.’ The dreams of this industrious woman were shattered when her father barged into her room with ‘good news’. He proudly announced that the Igwe (Nigerian word for Chief), who was already married to three women, had taken an interest in her and would consider taking her as his fourth wife. 24 Anwulika protested to this, knowing it meant that she wouldn’t be allowed past secondary school. All five of her older sisters had quietly accepted their fate and were now married with children. But she was different – smarter, more talented, more motivated than them. Why should she have to resign herself to the domestic life of kitchen and children just because her father said so? The picture painted here has been all too common in many African countries in the past. Parents were raising the ‘perfect’ girl purely so that she would one day be ‘chosen’ to be a wife; so that she could cook meals for her husband and make him happy. Raising a child and managing a home are undeniably admirable things, but she would never amount to anything more. Anwulika’s intelligence, her potential, her thirst for knowledge will never amount to anything.As she resigns herself to the mundane life of the housewife she never wanted to be, she says a silent prayer for her own daughter – that her 25 child will be everything she couldn’t be. And she will be. The Nigerian girl in the 21st century is far different from that ‘perfect’ woman of old. ‘What’s it like to be an African girl?’, people often ask me. I cannot answer that question, because I’m not just an African. I am Nigerian. I am an Igbo girl, and while our cultures are different, they are centered around the same value system. In the course of my life, I have been asked a lot of questions about Africa with regards to poverty, health, politics and the like. There is a lot of negativity associated with where I come from. However, being a girl in Nigeria definitely has its perks. While we are now educated like the girls in any western culture, we have kept or traditions intact. The value of family, respect and community will forever bond us together. There are over two hundred different languages spoken in Nigeria, two hundred tribes, two hundred ways of worship, and, still, we see ourselves as one. Our Half of the World Crystal Yip Traditionally, women were forced into the ‘weaker’ roles of society and therefore stereotyped as such. For example, females were not allowed to fight for their country because they were of the weaker sex. However, their ‘weakness’ was also what made them inferior to men. The two concepts of ‘weak women’ and ‘less important women’ were interwoven, used to oppress and reduce the value of females hundreds of years. The same is true of China: a country that has been through 67 dynasties and 446 emperors - all of which were men. However, 446 emperors did not mean 446 empresses. Emperors were allowed to have hundreds of wives if they wished, and it would be a woman’s dream to be one of those hundreds. They would have expensive clothes to wear, glamorous jewelry to choose from, delicious food to eat and a substantial supply of money. They could have anything they wanted, and they only had to share one thing - the emperor himself. If each concubine was allowed a fair share of the emperor, each wife would probably end up with a single eyelash each. This became a problem. Some wives were greedier than others, wanting more than the miniscule shavings of affection they were allotted.They wanted the emperor’s heart, and so, competition began. Wives would use their tricks to gain the much coveted position as the emperor’s ‘favourite’; they would cook for him, they would dance for him, they would sing for him, but the one way guaranteed to win the competition would be to produce a male heir for the emperor. As such, these wives became heir producing machines, with the birth of sons rejoiced and the birth of daughters mourned. Daughters 26 could not raise the status of their mother in the emperor’s eyes, and so the princesses were reduced to bargaining chips; they were sold off as wives to foreign princes to bridge alliances. While young princes grew up to compete over the emperor’s ‘dragon seat’ and continue the cycle of wife marrying and heir producing. Girls were tools - and that was that. Today, men no longer have the freedom to have multiple wives and women are allowed to join the armed forces. Seemingly, gender equality has finally been achieved. However, the introduction of the One Child Policy (1980) has prevented over 400 million births. In 2013, the Chinese 27 government announced that over the last four decades, the nation had aborted 336 million children, the majority of which were girls due to the lingering cultural preference for boys. The 21st century has seen the progression of anti discrimination against women. We, as the new generation of girls coming of age, are fortunate to have the chance of becoming independent, free thinking individuals, rather than victims of patriarchal authority. However, us girls still have a large battle to fight, and the soldiers, doctors, lawyers and supporters of Feminism must stand together and strengthen our claim to our half of the world. The Girls of our Home Hannah Anson According to the 2015 Global Gender Gap report, Britain ranks 18th out of 145 countries in terms of gender equality. Female life expectancy out weigh males’, and in 2008 we were ranked 16th in terms of the Gender Empowerment Measure. It is very interesting to note that according to this report, the male to female ratio for literacy rate and enrolment in both primary and secondary education is equal. Why, then, are the statistics for economic opportunity and political empowerment so shocking? The equality ranking (with 0.00 being complete inequality and 1.00 being perfect equality) for both women in parliament and the proportion of women as senior officials and managers was 0.27. These are the same statistics recorded in Guinea ... the only difference being that that country ranked 131st in gender equality. What is going wrong in the space between women leaving an equal education system and entering a world of employment riddled with entrenched misogyny and discrimination? When addressing the question of what it’s like to be a girl in my culture, I run the risk of being perceived as a ‘white privileged feminist’. This is a position I view as both close-minded and unacceptable. My interpretation and perspective of feminism is one that addresses the inequalities faced by both genders; the higher levels of discrimination faced by black women than white; the atrocities of child marriage and FGM that are faced by so many girls across the planet. I recognise that I’m extremely fortunate to be living in the 18th most equal country in the world. Whilst one acknowledges this, we run the risk of allowing fortune to fester into 28 complacency. No country in the world has achieved gender equality, and Britain is far from close. As a woman, I have encountered many acts of sexual harassment, in the form of uninvited groping at gigs or the hurling of derogatory insults whilst walking down the road. This is unacceptable and degrading, and I want to know how this ‘casual’ misogyny has found such a prominent place in our culture. Maybe it is to do with the rise of ‘Lad Culture’ which encourages the sexualisation or even raping of women? This phenomenon is particularly prevalent at universities, with an estimated 1 in 3 female students having experienced sexual assault on campus. Whilst this rise in the social acceptance of the objectification of women has clearly impacted our society, we should perhaps look at the deep-rooted causes of this. The professional world of Britain does not provide a good role model for citizens to base their perception of women on. Over 50,000 women find themselves fired as a result of 29 becoming pregnant, and female finance workers in London earn 36% less than men ... for doing exactly the same thing. These instances of deeprooted sexism range from the prevalence of sexual assault in the army, which is so pronounced that it has led to the production of explicit posters explaining the concept of consent, to the torrents of online abuse hurled at prominent female figures for voicing their opinions. Labour MP Stella Creasy evidences this, and was subjected to both rape and murder threats for the outrageous crime of campaigning to have Jane Austen appear on the ten pound note. I am not saying that I am ungrateful to live in the 18th most equal country in the world, but what I am saying is that this is not an excuse to become indolent. A deeprooted prejudice still holds a grip over British society, and until we make a conscious effort to address this everyday sexism, we cannot progress as a nation. 30 BOLLYWOOD Shakira Morar 31 32 Bollywood is a wonderful world of colour, entertainment and storytelling. But there are some elements that have hindered the progress of women and their perception of beauty, as seen by Vidya Balan’s case and the promotion of bleaching creams. Body shaming is a problem that is associated with Western culture but it is evidently present in Bollywood. Balan (actress) used to be large: she received criticism for this despite feeling comfortable with her shape and appearance when younger. Growing up led her to become aware of her body which is a feeling many can relate to. The fact that people were commenting on her shape and not her skills as an actress, demonstrates the embedded criticism of females in the entertainment industry. She was so upset by the comments that she took weight loss pills, as advised by a nutritionist who manipulated her. After losing weight, the nutritionist received the credit. Balan was congratulated for having responded to the criticism she had received but she knew this wasn’t right – she experienced the physical and emotional consequences. Balan realised she was always tired and eventually put the weight back on that she had lost; she went to see a doctor. Imagine the feeling of being told she was healthy. Her previously damaged health was a result of the 33 manipulation she underwent by those around her. She refused to thank those people who congratulated her on losing weight as this did her no favours, demonstrating to girls that no one is entitled to shame you for your body type. Balan emerged with her weight regained for her upcoming film and won four awards. By embracing her appearance, she showed that her success as an actress was not defined by her shape but by her hard work and healthy self. Although Bollywood actresses have been victimised, they have also played a role in the perception of beauty which has affected girls’ self-perception. Actresses are presented as pale which is perceived as beautiful. Although this is not in their control, it has led to the rise of bleaching creams. On the products, girls are presented with role models that appear paler than themselves, instead of those who promote ethnic pride. They are told what is more attractive by an industry looking to exploit their distorted perception of beauty. This is damaging and comes back to the idea that girls are more conscious of their appearance when older. Indian culture is a diverse spectrum of traditions, ideals and perceptions that have evolved over time. However, there would be more progress globally, if some were made outdated. 34 35 Let us rather be than beautiful who for we who are we are, manipulated into being. The puppet show must come to an end and the lifeless dolls must be allowed their own time to shine. No amount of bleaching cream, dieting or intense exercise regimes can change who I am - and I am beautiful for it. 36 37 Babies not Barbies Rebecca Ricketts The child beauty pageant industry is not new, and has been around since the 1920s. What is new is the transformation of a simple contest to find an attractive child, into a professional business that brings in around $20 billion a year, and is turning young girls into miniature beauty queens with garish, plastered on make-up, big hair and sequined costumes that are more reminiscent of Bratz than traditional princess outfits. Balancing grooming and performing with the right amount of pazaz must be an onerous task for a four-year-old who is still tackling her ABCs and 123s. David Carey makes the point that “Dressing children up in adult makeup and clothes robs them of childhood. Dress up is part of child’s play: it should not be forced on children.’’ Despite criticism that the pageants merely exist to allow ambitious, narcissistic parents to live through their children, the pageant industry thrives. In 2009 it was estimated that 250,000 children competed in 5,000 pageants in America, and that some spent up to $3,000 on their dresses. 38 By prioritising pageant costumes, fees and grooming over expenses such as rent, some competing families unsurprisingly go into debt ; some have confessed to spending up to $30,000 on the competitions. Apart from the financial costs associated with pageants, there are also concerns that emphasising the importance of beauty and appearance may be detrimental to the long-term mental health and well-being of such young children. Irish psychologist, David Carey observes: “I am not aware of any research about the impact of these pageants on the children. However, as a psychologist with an interest in child development, I think that over-emphasis on beauty and feminisation is counter-productive to the development of a girl’s ability to integrate into society as a whole person rather than an object of beauty.” In 2009, a poll of 3,000 teen girls showed that more than 39 a quarter would spend their money on their looks rather than their studies, while one in five had considered plastic surgery. An Ofsted study of almost 150,000 children aged 10 to 15 found that 32% worried about their bodies, while a recent BBC survey highlighted the fact that “half of girls aged 8 to 12 want to look like the women they see in the media, and six out of 10 thought they’d be happier if they were thinner”. There are some who argue that child beauty pageants can boost self-confidence, promote grace and good manners and that it’s often the child who wishes to attend. But whilst entering pageants can prove to be a positive thing for sensibly minded, ambitious young girls with firm adult guidance, there are some who question whether children can ever truly be said to form their own decisions. Frank Furedi, professor of sociology at the University of Kent and author of several books including Paranoid Parenting, says that modern parents are encouraged to make a heightened emotional investment in their children and to view them as extensions of themselves. “Parents tend to adopt a narcissistic view so when a child shows the slightest interest in anything they seize on it. If little Johnny picks up a violin, he’s going to be a composer. If little Mary is a gymnast, she’s going to win Olympic Gold. With the powerful impulse towards celebrity culture, the parental impulse becomes unrestrained. No child is entirely autonomous. If a child says ‘This is what I want to do,’ it’s generally not far from what the parent wants. It’s relational decision-making rather than a strong-willed child making decisions on their own. These pageants are not for kids to entertain other children. What one sees here are adult fantasies played out on a different stage. It’s for adults. It’s a couple of steps up from Crufts.” Is it any wonder the children on “Toddlers & Tiaras” have temper tantrums all the time? One mother on the show was criticized for asking her daughter to smoke fake cigarettes on stage; if you had to do that at such a young age, wouldn’t you get annoyed? To keep contestants bubbly, some parents give their girls “pageant crack” (a mix of energy drinks and sweeteners) prior to performing. Why continue this when there is ample evidence to show that it is detrimental to a child’s health and can mentally harm them for life? The most common mental health problems for girls are eating disorders, low self-esteem and depression - things that may be heightened by such contests. Let’s put a stop to this. Ban child beauty pageants and stop this craze from spreading. Beauty is not an achievement; it is an accidental attribute. Making little girls compete in these pageants creates a perception that perfection is a valid ambition. What a sad life lesson; that being pretty is the most important thing. Let children be children. Put the parents on the catwalk and see how they feel about it at the end of the day. 40 41 42 43 44 45 Being a Disney Princess Christy Au I don’t know about you, but I was always a Disney fan. I spent hours of my childhood in front of a book, a screen or a mirror, dreaming of being a princess and waiting for the day my prince would come. As children, these dreams were encouraged by our parents, who acted in full confidence of the belief that it will foster imagination, and that we will grow out of these silly fairy tales. Yet do we? Aren’t these fairy tales just replaced with ‘grown up’ versions of the same thing? I dressed up in their costumes for the first eight years of my life; Cinderella, Aurora and even Snow White. Later, these costumes made way for others, but the dream stayed more or less unchanged; I didn’t really want to be an actual princess anymore (I’ve realised by this point how hard royal life is), but I wanted to be as precious, loved and respected as one. So what did a ‘princess’ have that I didn’t have? With full encouragement from my parents (who believed that girls and women must be 46 ‘refined’), I learnt the basic skills that they required of me: singing, dancing, a musical instrument and musical appreciation, art and even etiquette lessons. In hindsight, I was still looking upon those princesses and those celebrities that I deem ‘princess-like’ as my idols. In my mother’s perspective, she was grooming me into what Jane Austen would call an ‘accomplished woman’. Luckily, I enjoyed these activities; I cannot imagine the mental torture they would be if I wasn’t inclined towards these pursuits in the first place. Yet, while I can learn and read and become proficient, there was one thing that I couldn’t get, no matter the sacrifice: a perfect, ‘princess-like’ appearance. My mother once relayed an event that happened when I was a baby. Walking into the doctor’s office for her regular checkup after the birth, she asked the gynaecologist one question: ‘How can I help my daughter maintain a good 47 figure?’ In that one session, my mom was taught how to limit my milk formula, the exercises I must do (swimming was the key to growth, which meant that I had to do it for eleven years) and other miscellaneous comments that came into play during my childhood. It wasn’t until that moment (at the age of eleven when I heard this anecdote) that I realised how much care my mother put into my physical appearance. I am not saying it was a bad thing at all, but to realise that my figure and my face meant that much in society forced me to start thinking about the more aesthetic side of what it means to be me. While depth of character is certainly an absolutely crucial aspect of a person, strangers are first drawn in by physical appearance and even, as my mother says, by your aura. These superficial skills are needed and must be trained, but the process of being forced to perform and the subtle reminders of my physical attributes are torture for a more introverted person like me. The general idea was that I would become desensitised to these surroundings and adopt these rules and skills as my own. Like the Disney princess I wanted to be as a child, I learnt how to smile, laugh and flatter to my advantage. To motivate and drive and push for my gain. My mother’s full social schedule meant that I had a large platform to practise in front of, and things like corsets for figure lines, heels and makeup tutorials had their place in my childhood. Looking at who I am now, and piecing together the different lessons that were taught to my younger self only led me to one conclusion: this … this was what my mother’s ‘Disney princess’ looked like.Yet after all this, after the point when my mother was satisfied with her ‘creation’, it was my turn to be displeased. The Barbie dolls that I played with, which later turned into the Barbie dolls I see in magazines and on television, fueled a desire to be like them. Although I logically knew, and still know, that it is not possible, it never stopped me from hoping and feeling self conscious about it. My selfesteem and confidence was never able to fully take off, making me an empty facade of drive and selfassuredness that I do not feel. So what am I now? I am a girl with a determined smile and a hard spark in the curl of my lips that indicate otherwise. My voice is talented; it orates the power of my pen, and my face, though not perfect, can stand out in a crowd. My hands are strong; they lyricise my words and dance - across the keyboard or clasped round a microphone as I serenade an audience. My brain is sharp; it can trade barbed words across a debating floor, philosophise or even create, arguments and artworks from the endless fount of me. 48 But my mind? My mind is that of a toddler on their first day of school, or that of a tired, old man; weary of judgement and exhausted with the whirlwind that is societal life but still hoping for, and reminiscing about being the epitome of perfection. The ultimate beauty. 49 That is what being a Disney princess means - subjecting yourself to a set of standards created by society. Feminism, therefore, is only the means by which we humanise our princesses, and show the world that Cinderella, before her transformation was just as beautiful as before. 50 SOMETIMES. THE BOUNDARIES ARE THAT OF SOCIETAL EXPECTATION. BUT IN THE END. IT IS ONLY YOU WHO CAN FREE YOURSELF. 51 52 Fundraising for WomanKind Imogen Barrett We chose to support the Womankind charity through our magazine because it linked so closely with both the ethos of Aqila (exploring the roles of women in different cultures) and our own grateful sense of being girls within a school that so rightly enables us to thrive. The charity aims to end violence against women and enable women to take control of their own livelihood. Many charities provide physical aid, such as medicine and provisions, but we were touched by the emotional nature of the aid work that the charity does: educating and supporting women through words of advice and comfort. To raise money, we began by selling copies of last year’s edition of our magazine, which both helped raise awareness for our magazine and the charity. We did this in various installments and raised enough money to know we were going to make a difference to women’s lives ... a very gratifying feeling. Then, we did a charity bake sale and in the end, managed to raise over £300. In no country in the world do women enjoy the same rights or opportunities as men, and we feel proud that we can unite as one to fight against this injustice. 53 NOW. WE NEED YOU TO PASS ON THIS MESSAGE... Like it. Tweet it. Shout about it. Whatever you do. Make sure you do something to pass on our message of GENDER EQUALITY. It is only when we unite that things happen. 52