Benoy/Atkinson Chronicle

Transcription

Benoy/Atkinson Chronicle
Benoy/Atkinson Chronicle
Christmas 2010
The Espionage Edition.
A Good Year for
Benoy Family
Renovations Complete –
Atkinson Office Finally
Finished
A Vancouver doctor’s dilapidated office is
no longer an embarrassment. Following
extensive negotiations with building
owners, the go-ahead was finally given for
renewal of Dr. Atkinson’s downtown digs.
Chronicle readers will remember the
good doctor’s plaintiff uttering in these
pages last year that renovations were “in
process.”
North
Vancouver
Atkinson/Benoys
continue to avoid authorities, carrying out
covert activities on two continents. CSIS
spokesman insists human elements are
innocent of wrongdoing, but feline family
member faces numerous possible charges
under Canadian anti-terrorism laws.
Mittens continues under house arrest.
“A lick of Paint and New Flooring
and it Will Look Great!”
Chronicle readers will be pleased to note
that capital cost allowances and funding
from undisclosed other sources have led
to substantial improvements being made.
Is prosecution pending for ferocious
feline?
One patient who refused to identify
herself noted that waiting room
conditions (see above) have improved
markedly.
“I’ve always liked Dr.
Atkinson. Now I can honestly say that I
like her office too. It is a shame that
planning permission for the planned
coffee bar and spa facilities were
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refused.” Nonetheless, the new décor has
sparked increased interest in Doctor
Atkinson’s practice and prospective
patients face a long wait-list.
Wait-List Lengthens at New Office –
Who or What is Behind the Funding?
two weeks of the Olympics had some of
the mildest winter weather in recent
memory. Snow was actually trucked in
from inland mountains to enable events to
continue. Local embarrassment was
mollified by the decision to site the next
such event in Russia’s warm-weather
resort, Sochi. Why not England?
Canadian Short Track Skaters
Celebrate Gold Medal Victory
2010 Winter Olympics in
Vancouver
Lynn Valley Celebrates Canadian Win
Over USA in Gold Medal Hockey.
Tax-Fueled Flames Light Local Sky.
2010 proved an interesting year as the
Winter Olympics dominated headlines
locally. Vancouver and Whistler hosted
the world and provided countless photo
opportunities, even to those unable to
attend the sporting events themselves.
Downtown streets were packed, which
was more than can be said about snow
conditions on the local mountains. The
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Benoy involvement in the events
remained peripheral, with television
viewing the most affordable option.
Family members did attend one medal
ceremony, however. Was it to contact
foreign agents?
Dancer Returns to Stage
in 2010
SFU student and noted local musician,
Nicholas Benoy, continues to entertain
audiences and strike fear in the hearts of
front row musicians. Nicholas continued
to practice and perform with the pubsponsored Black Bear Band in 2010.
Band
director
Ken
Osterreicher
departed, citing personal, rather than
musical or ideological reasons, but the
troublesome trombonist remains.
Europe Infiltrated
Military Sites
Compromised
Benoy senior penetrates European
defense installations, posing as tourist.
Interpol is currently investigating
possible compromising of French Maginot
Line defenses.
Elizabeth Benoy Returned to the Stage.
Local ballerina, Elizabeth Benoy returned
to dance after lengthy rehabilitation
following hip surgery. Audiences were
saddened by news that she would no
longer participate in the performing
company, but delighted to note that she
would still make twice-yearly public
performances.
Black Bear “Impaler”
Continues Performances
Despite Scholastic
Commitments
Photographic evidence recently surfaced,
indicating that Kevin Benoy not only
penetrated the legendary French military
installations, but that he gathered
considerable intelligence data in doing so.
Speaking on behalf of the Elysee Palace,
Presidential
spokesman
Christian
Lambert said “Security at Fort
Hackenburg, a state of the art facility
near Thionville, may have been
compromised by a Canadian operative
working for an unidentified agency.
Security forces are working around the
clock to determine the degree to which
French national security is undermined.”
Suspect identified at Fort Hackenburg
Flautist Fears Trombonist Taunts.
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Several images have appeared on a
blogsite attributed to Mr. Benoy –
Chronicle investigators have identified
the site and are prepared to provide the
URL, citing similar press freedoms as
have thus far protected Wikileaks. Fort
Hackenburg images are specifically found
at
http://benoysummertravel2010.blogspot.com
/2010/07/day-4-mostly-at-fort-hackenbergmaginot.html
Benoy apparently visiting Ieper and
Brugge.
Char-B Tank. France’s Premier Armoured
Vehicle Photographed by Benoy
Image From Within Subterranean
Installation
Unofficial information provided by the
Interior Ministry suggests that Benoy
may have visited the following sites:
Paris, St. Denis, Compiegne, Verdun,
Thionville, Perrone, Arras, numerous
locations in the Somme Valley, Vimy
Ridge,
Belgium,
Laon,
Coucy,
Pierrefonds, Amiens, Beauvais, Senlis,
and Chantilly, before briefly disappearing
in the vicinity of Paris.
Two More Infiltrators
CCT cameras at Charles De Gaulle
Airport provide even more startling news.
Two of Benoy’s accomplices were also at
large in France. Kathryn Atkinson, his
wife, and Elizabeth Benoy, his daughter.
Yet Another Compromising Image –
Defense Works at Vimy Ridge
The main site can be seen at
http://benoysummertravel2010.blogspot.com
/
Close investigation of the site reveals
hundreds of images, many of which relate
to French national security in France’s
North-East Departments.
Belgian
security was also compromised, with
Two More Agents Infiltrate France
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Sources indicate that all three agents
slipped away, probably hiding in a safe
house in the cathedral town of Chartres,
before moving on to an undisclosed
location in the Loire Valley.
E09 in the direction of Oradour-surGlane, but there are conflicting reports
that suggest this was a ruse and that the
same vehicle was later spotted further
south, near Cahors.
Numerous
independent reports place them at
Gourdon, Pech Merle, St. Cirq Lapopie,
Cahors, Gouffre de Padirac and
Rocomadour, though none of these can be
confirmed.
It is certain that they stayed in another
safe house in the Lot countryside – in the
village of Nadillac.
Kevin’s cousin,
Malcolm, resides there and the region has
a significant expatriate community.
Chenenceau, One of the Loire
Locations Where Benoys & Atkinson
Were Believed to Have Visited
The Loire safe house seems to have been
in the vicinity of Vernantes and may be in
the village of Parcay-les-Pins -- ideally
located for surveillance of such sites as
Azay-le-Rideau, Usse, Ambois, Chinon,
Chenenceau, and Saumur.
The
threesome are also believed to have stayed
at Loches, in the southern Loire.
Comfortable and Unconcerned by
Camera Surveillance, Numerous
Foreign Agents Celebrate in the
Comparative Safety of Nadillac.
Cultural Differences
Incite Restaurant
Debacle
Kathryn and Elizabeth, on the Pont
Valentre in Cahors?
Interior Ministry spokesman, Pierre le
Rat, said “The trail of the Benoys is only
sketchy after Loches. Motorway cameras
show that a grey Peugeot 308 that may
well belong to them, was seen exiting the
It is rumoured that Elizabeth, aged 15,
may be the reason for the sudden
departure of the Benoys from Nadillac.
When asked by the proprietress of the
local auberge if she wanted red wine, the
young agent answered “no.” When white
was suggested, she also replied ‘no.”
Turning on her heels, the proprietress
uttered “Ah oui, c’est rose.” Elizabeth’s
subsequent refusal of the beverage caused
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general bewilderment, likely hastening
their leaving the region.
Chronicle sources indicated their the
Benoys staying in the 1st arrondisment –
possibly around Rue St. Honore.
The group was next identified in
Burgundy, then in Paris.
Parking
cameras note that they visited Autun and
Beaune. It is thought that Kevin may
have used the Church of St. Lazare in
Autun as a drop point as he seemed to
have an inordinate interest in the
Gislebertus carvings contained within it.
Elizabeth Spotted on the Quai de
Louvre.
Gislebertus at Autun. Why the
Interest?
Hostel Dieu at Beaune. Yet Another
Sighting
Noteddestination.
Paris was their
final French
In early August the trail disappeared.
While there is some speculation that the
Benoys remained in an undisclosed
location in the Paris region, there is good
evidence that they left France completely.
A bomb scare on the Eurostar on August
4 might have been a diversion intended to
cover their tracks.
The arrival of
Nicholas Benoy at Gatwick Airport on
August 6 may be further evidence that
their next destination was Britain. It is
likely that they went to ground in
Ramsbury, Barry, Llandew and Herne
Bay, where the Benoys have family
residing.
Atkinson/Benoy/Goodrich Gang
Meeting. What Plots Were Hatched?
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British Military Secrets
Compromised
In a Chronicle exclusive, undeniable
evidence has surfaced indicating that the
spy ring has been at least as active in the
UK as it was in France. The two images
below were provided by an unidentified
source close to the Benoys.
New British “Dalek” Weapon System.
Note Elizabeth’s Arm and Camera.
Scandal in Guiding
Movement – Elizabeth
Benoy Granted Canada
Cord
The guiding movement was rocked by
news that Elizabeth Benoy was awarded
this prestigious honour despite rumours
of her underground activity. How is it
possible that the precocious Pathfinder
could earn this award, given her
nefarious background?
Chronicle
sources point to outside pressure on the
Guiding movement. Is there a deal in the
works between the PMO, CSIS and the
Benoys? Expect to hear more in the next
edition of the Christmas Chronicle.
Benoy Attends Ceremony Under Police
Escort. Why the Smile?
Nicholas Benoy Acquires
Dangerous Talents
HMS Victory – Newly Recommissioned
British Warship, Set to Replace HMS Ocean.
Zero Emission Propellant System Sets New
Global Standards for Carbon Neutral
Weapon Systems. Photo by K. Benoy.
The Benoy cell seems to be gaining new
high tech skills.
Nicholas Benoy,
attending Simon Fraser University, is now
in his 3rd year in the faculty of
Geography. Chronicle reporters have
uncovered
startling
evidence
that
Nicholas is becoming adept at Geographic
Information Systems.
One of the
Wikileaks releases indicates that the
young
Benoy
has
completed
a
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3Dimensional model of Rocinha favela in
Rio de Janiero. The CIA speculates that
this might indicates that the Benoys are
associating with local drug cartels, though
Benoy claims he his simply modeling the
possible effects of landslides on this slum
settlement.
Lions Gate Bridge Targetted? Photo
Evidence from Room D208
Nicholas and an Unidentified Associate
Benoy Cell Infiltrates
Canadian Government
New intelligence indicates that Nicholas
Benoy has put his GIS skills to use in
acquiring a co-op work placement at
Environment Canada’s downtown office.
CSIS is monitoring the situation
carefully.
Shocking News.
Sutherland School Now
Insurgency Training
Institute
The Chronicle can now report with
certainty that Kevin Benoy’s association
with Sutherland Secondary is more than
just a cover for his clandestine activities.
Investigative reporters clearly identify
Benoy involved in the recruitment and
training of covert operatives. Benoy is
personally instructing young agents in
map
interpretation
and
political
indoctrination.
Photo Exclusive – New Young Agents
Recruited at Benoy’s Booth.
Social Studies 8, Social Studies 11 and
History 12 continue to be centers of youth
radicalization in the North Vancouver
school and Benoy’s 86% Club yearly
recruits top young academics. Benoy
continues to chair a committee of
administrators and teachers operating
under the cover of staging the Graduation
Ceremony and awarding of Scholarships.
The latter is suspected to be a money
laundering operation intended to fund the
insertion of moles in Canada’s top postsecondary
educational
institutions.
Numerous Sutherland “graduates” have
been seen reporting directly to Benoy on
local streets and even, most brazenly,
doing so at Sutherland School itself.
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Foreign Agents Identified
in Gislebertus’ Images
Finally a connection has been made
between Benoy’s European activities and
Middle Eastern espionage. CIA and MI6
agents collaborated to provide the
evidence needed to apprehend three
Middle Eastern plotters, seeking to
undermine authority in the largely Arabpopulated
Jerusalem
suburb
of
Bethlehem.
The agents were found to be employing
the latest in global positioning system
equipment. The “star” or “comet” as the
extraterrestrial object is commonly
known, is of unknown origin – though
many point to it as being “Eastern.”
Intelligence services are still unsure of the
identity of the fourth operative, though
his flying apparatus points to a
technologically advanced national origin.
The “Three Wise Men” Caught Resting
En-Route to Bethlehem.
Three More Agents Flee the Scene as
Authorities Close In
Benoys Responsible for
European Airport
Fiasco?
Snow Closes Gatwick
Flights Cancelled at Paris – Charles De
Gaulle Airport Departures Board
Weather disruptions in Europe during
the Christmas season of 2010 may well be
connected with the activities of the Benoy
espionage cell. How and why this has
occurred is yet to be determined, but the
mysterious activities of the Benoys in
Europe must be more than just
coincidence. After all, airports in three of
the countries visited all experienced
closures. Why would so many airports
experience de-icing fluid shortages in the
same year that the Benoy’s were active in
Europe?
Could Nicholas Benoy be
behind new emerging weather patterns?
Conspiracy theorists have much to work
with here.
Finally, Merry Christmas
From the Staff at the
Benoy/Atkinson Christmas
Chronicle!
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