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Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Noted . Notable . Noteworthy . LGBT News & Views Volume 23 . Number 03 Candidate announces Sutkowski runs for Charlotte council page 7 Not for Reproduction June 13 . 2009 Printed on Recycled Paper Not for Reproduction A memoir filled with joy page 21 FREE q-notes.com Exec appointed Pols ‘outed’ N.C. native takes office helm Linda Ketner apologizes page 14 page 15 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction T A B L E O F C O N T E N T S Front and center: www.q-notes.com Volume 23 Number 03 PO Box 221841 • Charlotte, NC 28222 • 704.531.9988 . 704.531.1361 June 13, 2009 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Drag Rag 26 A memoir filled with joy 21 Editor’s Note 05 General Gayety 25 News Notes: Domestic 09 Articles: 07 News Notes: Global 08 Associate Editor: David Stout Conference builds bridges 04 News Notes: NC 10 Special Assignments: Lainey Millen Exited about Pride 20 On being a gay parent 24 Jennings appointed to post 14 Out and About 30 Ketner makes apology 15 Out in the Stars 29 Sneak peek: Next issue 14 Q-Poll 15 Triad Pride attracts 1,000 12 Tell Trinity 28 editor@q-notes.com Graphic Design/Production: Lainey Millen Ad Sales: Marketing Jim Yarbrough, Manager Ad Sales . National: Rivendell Media 704.531.9988 704.531.9988 production@q-notes.com adsales@q-notes.com 212.242.6863 Material in Q-Notes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2009 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. Q-Notes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. The editorial positions of Q-Notes are expressed in staff editorials and editor's notes and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of Q-Notes or its staff. Q-Notes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return. Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity. advertising space deadlines Not for Reproduction 01 Candidate embarks on council run Editor/New Media: Matt Comer JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes QList-Best of the LGBT Carolinas FAX To find a copy, go to www.q-notes.com/distribution-points/ 2 Columns: issue: 06-27 deadline: 06-17 issue: 07-11 deadline: 07-01 Editorial Contributors: Features: Love song no one knows is gay 22 ‘Phantom’ returns to Queen City 23 Matt Comer, J. Lynn Davidson, Kevin Grooms/Miss Della, Pam Kelley, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, Leslie Robinson, David Stout, Trinity, Brett Webb-Mitchell issue: 07-25 deadline: 07-15 IN OUR NEXT ISSUE: Red, White issue: 08-08 deadline: 07-29 To advertise, call 704.531.9988 or email adsales@q-notes.com. & Queer 1 6 9 9 JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 3 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction R E L I G I O N Conference builds bridges for gay evangelicals Editor’s Note Evangelical Network holds annual event in Gastonia Reported originally at Q-Notes Online on June 3, news of Linda Ketner’s so-called “outing”of three Palmetto State Republicans spread like a wildfire through the liberal and LGBT blogosphere. Ketner, a lesbian, 2008 candidate for South Carolina’s First Congressional District, told FireDogLake blogger Howie Klein that U.S. Sen. Lindsey Graham, S.C. Sen. Glenn McConnell and Lt. Gov.André Bauer were all closeted gays. Much like the premiere of the film “Outrage,” which explores several high-profile by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff When most people hear the word “evangelical,” they immediately think of people like the late Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson of “The 700 Club” or Focus on the Family’s James Dobson. Far-right fundamentalists, it seems, don’t have a monopoly on the word. Over the last weekend in May, LGBT Christians and evangelicals from around the nation convened in Gastonia, N.C., for a weekend of fellowship, worship, community building and guidance. The Evangelical Network’s annual conference was held here on the east coast for the first time in the group’s 10-year run. “We had never done a conference on the east coast,” says Ed Ness, The Evangelical Network’s media director.“We’d predominately been in the midwest and southwest.” Ness says that the cost of travel is a challenge to many of his group’s members. Holding conferences in different parts of the country each year helps those who can’t always travel far. Over 100 people attended the conference. Many of the attendees were from the Carolinas and the South, including Georgia and Kentucky. Some came from as far away as California and Canada. David Thomas, pastor of Abundant Grace Church near Hickory, was one of several local leaders who helped to organize the conference and assist with logistics. He told Q-Notes that he was excited to bring the conference to the state and help heal some of the rifts between LGBT people and their faith. “Evangelicals have given the word ‘evangelical’ a bad rap,” he said.“The word comes from a Greek word meaning ‘good news.’ It is the good news of Jesus Christ. We believe the gospel, the good news of Jesus Christ, that he came to bring love, peace, deliverance and salvation to liberate peoples’ lives.” Thomas was a speaker during one of the conference’s several worship experiences. He said he wanted to give people the message that they shouldn’t ever let anyone look down on them for any reason. “If you are a person who believes in God, loves God, don’t let people look down on you,” he said.“Live a life that exemplifies what Christ’s life was about: love and caring for other people.” Thomas, who has been together with his partner, a pastor at a gay-welcoming church in Winston-Salem, for 13 years, founded Abundant Grace Church in 2003. Prior to the church’s founding he had helped to lead a small Bible study for LGBT people. “Our church is created to be a place for all people,” he said,“but we notice in the gay community they were not finding what they were looking for.” He said many LGBT-affirming churches didn’t have enough of an evangelical feel for many folks who grew up in Baptist or Pentecostal traditions. Candace Chellew-Hodge, associate pastor at Columbia’s Garden of Grace United Church of Christ, was a featured speaker and work- 4 P E R S P E C T I V E by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff Ketner’s ‘outing’ spree shop discussion leader at the conference. Her workshop, along with several essays written over several years, is the basis of her book, “Bulletproof Faith,” which came out in October 2008. “The workshop gives folks tools and ways to respond to attacks from other people who say you can’t be LGBTQ and Christian,” she said. Chellew-Hodge has been fighting to heal LGBT Christians’ faiths for years. In the days when the internet was still some newfangled toy most folks had never used, she founded seen us use quotation marks around the word and describe her statements in other ways.As Charleston City Paper Gay Charleston blogger Greg Hambrick said, all Ketner really is guilty of is spreading “cocktail chatter.” Unfortunately,“cocktail chatter” can get you into a load of trouble. Trust me, I know. I once got into similar hot water after participating in online rumor-mongering about North Carolina’s Rep. Patrick McHenry and some of his colleagues and peers. Ketner has apologized for her remarks (as I once had to do). Hopefully her statements won’t come back to haunt her if she ever runs for office again. Here’s to looking forward to 2010 and her next possible candidacy and second attempt at giving Henry Brown the boot. Q Enter for FREE tickets at www.q-notes.com. Jeff Smith, of Louisville, Ky., worships with other Evangelical Network conference-goers. Whosoever, the world’s first online magazine for LGBT Christians. Publishing new material each and every month, Whosoever covers all sorts of issues and provides resources for those seeking to reconcile their faith and sexuality. “The most popular topic, by far, is homosexuality and religion,” ChellewHodge said.“Whosoever has been an amazing resource for people who are looking for ways to talk to family members and friends about being gay and Christian and reconciling their faith and sexual orientation. That can be difficult.” Chellew-Hodge said she’s had “more people than I can count” tell her how much of a change in their lives the online magazine’s resources made for them. She thinks that the Bible is still the LGBT community’s biggest stumbling block.“We want to know that we are okay, that we are not condemned.” Chellew-Hodge says the stories she hears of others coming to terms with faith and identity are enough to break her heart. “It is the reason why I wrote the book, trying to give people a road map on how I got to where I am,” she said.“I’m where I don’t have to fight with anyone anymore, or argue with anyone. I’ve stopped taking it personally, because I know that I am okay with my god.” Ness said the conference was a success. Next year, they’ll head off to Irvine, Calif., right in the middle of Orange County — heart of conservative California. Q JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction outings, the news of Ketner’s statements has sparked a controversy over outing and its merits, or lack thereof. I support the outing of closeted,antigay elected officials,but certainly not just the Republicans — anti-gay Democrats and those from other parties are just as much at risk.I’ve always believed that the main issue is hypocrisy: How dare an elected official vote against the LGBT community when he or she is engaging in some of the same-sexual behavior they work to eradicate? Hypocrisy has no place in public service.None. But, like blogger and activist Michael Rogers, I also believe that outing should be done wisely, with facts and solid evidence.What Ketner did really wasn’t “outing.” In our reporting you’ve Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 5 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction P O L I T I C S Gay candidate embarks on Charlotte council run Owen Sutkowski is ‘first viable’ gay man on a Charlotte ballot by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff CHARLOTTE — For the first time in Charlotte politics, an openly gay man might have a viable chance at winning election to city council. Owen Sutkowski, 26, assistant director of Student Life at Queens University, announced his run for the District 1 seat on Owen Sutkowski will face a popular incumbent in a September Democratic primary. the Charlotte City Council at the end of May with an official kickoff party at Dilworth Neighborhood Grille. Since his announcement, Sutkowski has been making the rounds at community meetings, neighborhood associations and social functions. He’ll have a tough, uphill climb, facing popular District 1 City Councilwoman Patsy Kinsey in a Democratic primary on Sept. 15. Sutkowski, who is openly gay and who is been in a relationship with his partner for two years, isn’t the first openly gay or lesbian person to run for city election — for days after his initial announcement, community members and media, including Q-Notes reported that he was. Robert Sheets, a president of the 1980s-era Queen City Quordinators, the former non- 6 JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction profit publisher of Q-Notes, ran unsuccessfully in 1987 and 1989. Openly lesbian Sue Henry ran a write-in campaign in 1995. Despite the initial inaccuracies, veteran campaign manager Henk Jonker — who has worked on several successful area campaigns — says Sutkowski is the first viable, openly gay candidate in Charlotte’s political scene. Sutkowski is portraying himself as a fresh change for Charlotte and his district. “I am excited to begin connecting people and ideas for change in Charlotte,” he said in a press release.“Your voice is more than a vote. With the election of President Barack Obama, communities across the nation, including Charlotte, expressed a hopeful need for a fresh outlook on public service. Whether you have lived here for two months or 20 years, your vision and voice matter to me and our community.” Sutkowski has never held public office before, but has worked with several city government and private agencies, including serving as a member on the city’s Competition and Privatization Advisory Committee, the programming chair of the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Community Relations Committee and a mediator with the Charlotte Housing Authority. Sutkowski earned his undergraduate degree from Indiana University. He recently completed a Master’s of Science in Organizational Development degree at Queens University. His campaign issues focus on openness and transparency in local government, public safety and city planning. “Today’s economic and social realities call for new and effective public servants,” he said in a press release.“These individuals must proactively work with a variety of communities in the creation of sensible and practical strategies for change.” In past elections, the LGBT-friendly Kinsey has received endorsements from MeckPAC, the county’s LGBT political action committee. It remains to be seen who the committee will endorse this year. For more information, visit www.owensutkowski.com. Online Only See Q-Notes’ video report from Sutkowski’s campaign kickoff at www.q-notes.com/ multimedia/. Q Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 7 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction G L O B A L International News Notes Parliament supports school ban VILNIUS, Lithuania — Parliament has voted in favor of a bill that would ban discussion of homosexuality and LGBT issues in public schools. The ban includes prohibitions against references to homosexuality in any public information that can be viewed by children. The bill is entitled,“Law on the Protection of Minors against the Detrimental Effect of Public Information.” Not yet passed fully into law, the amend- Lithuanian activists marched in Baltic Pride on May 16, 2009. Lithuania has seen an increase in violence, discrimination and intimidation against LGBT people. Photo Credit: Amnesty International ment places homosexuality alongside portrayals of physical or psychological violence, the display of a dead or cruelly mutilated body of a person, and information that arouses fear or horror, or encourages self-mutilation or suicide, as information unsuitable for children. “By voting to move forward with this bill, the Seimas has reinforced discrimination based on a person’s sexual orientation,” said Nicola Duckworth, Europe and Central Asia program director for Amnesty International. “The amendment denies the right to freedom of expression and deprives students’ access to the support and protection they may need. The Lithuanian parliament must respect everyone’s full rights and reject this amendment when it comes to the final vote.” — by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff Controversial bill passed EDMONTON, Canada — The Legislative Assembly of Alberta passed a controversial LGBT rights and parental choice bill at the end of May. Bill 44 officially protects the rights of LGBT people but also allows parents to pull their children from classrooms when lessons on human sexuality, religion and sexual orientation occur, The Calgary Herald reported. Alberta Culture Minister Lindsay Blackett 8 said a “silent majority”supported the bill.The most controversial aspect of the bill was the parental choice section. “For those people around the country that think that’s somehow wrong, we in Alberta believe in family values, because the family’s at the core of what makes a great community,” Blackett said.“We’re taking a lead, here.” Blackett said it took courage to pass such a bill. Other politicians scoffed at the idea. “It takes courage to give our children an uneven educational experience,” EdmontonClare representative Laurie Blakeman asked.“I takes courage to write crappy legislation where you take something that belongs in the School Act and ram it into human rights (legislation)? That’s not courage.” Blakeman was among several liberal politicians who sought to have the parental opt-out options stricken from the bill. Calgary-Buffalo representative Kent Hehr said the parental opt-out clause was a compromise, used to pass protections for LGBT people.“I think, at the end of the day, it was a dirty little trade,” he told The Herald. — M.C. Priest to defy ban BRISBANE,Australia — A Catholic priest says he will not be “bullied” by the Roman Catholic Church. He has vowed to continue holding services despite a church edict banning him from performing ecclesiastical duties anywhere in the world. Archbishop of Brisbane John Bathersby imposed the ban on Father Peter Kennedy after the priest established a rival church when he was dismissed for allowing women to preach and for blessing same-sex couples. Kennedy says up to 1,500 people attend his St. Mary’s in Exile services. Kennedy says he will continue his quest. “It’s not so much me that I’m concerned about, it’s the community,” he told the Australian ABC News. “But the community will stand strong. I know that.” Under the archbishop’s ban, Kennedy cannot say mass, officiate at weddings, preach or hear confessions. Kennedy says the ruling is “ruthless and vindictive.” He says he’ll ignore it. “I will continue to celebrate liturgies and eucharist,” he said.“Certainly it will make a difference about children wanting to be baptised, and certainly about weddings. I’ll have to get a marriage celebrant’s licence. But this man may be the Archbishop, but he has made, in the opinion of many of us, a very unjust decision.” — M.C. Q D O M E S T I C because of the anti-gay marriage measure. Serving as co-counsel on the case are Theodore B. Olson and David Boies, the by David Stout . Q-Notes staff attorneys who argued Bush v. Gore on N.H. legalizes gay marriage opposite sides in 2000. CONCORD, N.H. — On June 3, Gov. John Olson, a former U.S. Solicitor General, repLynch signed legislation that will give the legal resented George W. Bush in the historic case protections of marriage to gay and lesbian that decided the presidential election. Boies couples in New Hampshire. Lynch signed the represented Al Gore in the proceeding. This is bill only an hour after the legislature took the the first time they have served alongside each final vote on the issue. The state Senate voted other as co-counsel. 14-10 in favor of the bill earlier The suit calls for in the day. The state House folan injunction lowed later in the afternoon, votagainst Prop. 8 until ing 198-176. The law will take the case is resolved, effect January 1, 2010. which would imme“Today is a historic day for all diately reinstate Granite Staters,” said Mo Baxley, marriage rights for executive director of the New same-sex couples. Hampshire Freedom to Marry The case is a project Coalition.“We applaud Governor of the newly created Lynch, Speaker Norelli, President American Larsen and the leadership of the Foundation for General Court for making sure Equal Rights, which that all loving, committed couis dedicated to proples have the freedom to marry. tecting and advancToday, our shared values of indiing equal rights for vidual liberty, freedom, and fairevery American ness have been upheld.” through legal, poliNew Hampshire is the sixth cy and political New Hampshire Gov. John Lynch state to extend the freedom to advocacy. marry to gay and lesbian couples. National News Notes Federal court challenge for Prop 8 LOS ANGELES, Calif. — The day after the California Supreme Court upheld the validity of Proposition 8, a federal lawsuit was filed by two same-sex couples who wish to be married but have been denied marriage licenses WASHINGTON, D.C. — The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force’s National Religious Leadership Roundtable and the Center for American Progress have each released groundbreaking reports analyzing religious and secular advocacy of marriage equality School victory, part one NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Dozens of schools in the state have restored access to LGBT websites, after the ACLU filed suit against two Tennessee school districts for unconstitutionally blocking student access to them. The company that provides internet filtering software to as many as 107 Tennessee schools has adjusted the software to allow access to a variety of educational and political LGBT websites that were previously blocked. “All we ever wanted was to be able to get information out about LGBT issues, like what our legal rights are or what scholar- ships are available for LGBT students, so I’m really happy that the schools are finally making our Web access fair and balanced,” said Bryanna Shelton, a 16-year-old student at Fulton High School in Knoxville and a plaintiff in the case. On May 19, the ACLU filed the case in the U.S. District Court for the Middle District of Tennessee against Metropolitan Nashville Public Schools and Knox County Schools on behalf of two high school students in Nashville, one student in Knoxville and a high school librarian in Knoxville who is also the advisor of the school’s Gay-Straight Alliance (GSA). School victory, part two SACRAMENTO, Calif. — On June 1, a Superior Court here dismissed a lawsuit seeking to invalidate SB 777, the California Student Civil Rights Act, which prohibits discrimination against students on the basis of race, religion, disability, gender, and sexual orientation. The lawsuit was brought by a right-wing group that specifically objected to protections for LGBT students. The court held that the plaintiffs had failed to show any way in which the statute was even allegedly unlawful. The lawsuit was filed on Nov. 5, 2008. State Superintendent Jack O’Connell, represented by California Attorney General Jerry Brown, filed a motion to dismiss the lawsuit on Jan. 8, 2009. On Mar. 19, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, Lambda Legal, the Transgender Law Center, Equality California, and Gay-Straight Alliance Network filed a friend-of-the-court brief supporting the motion to dismiss. Q JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Studies find faith alliances crucial ballot initiatives in California and Michigan. Although examining different campaigns in different states in different years, the two reports draw remarkably similar conclusions about the need for partnerships between religious and secular supporters of equal rights for LGBT people. The Task Force’s report examines last fall’s Prop. 8 battle, highlighting religious-secular partnerships relevant to marriage equality. The Center’s report examines the role that religious groups played in support of and opposition to Proposal 2, the ballot initiative on marriage equality in Michigan. Both reports find that anti-LGBT ballot initiatives are often rooted in conservative religious rhetoric. Effective responses require faith voices and messages to counteract these claims in order to show religious diversity in support of marriage equality and to disprove the notion that conservative religious voices are the sole guardians of morality on these issues. Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 9 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction N O R T H C A R O L I N A N O R T H North Carolina News Notes Bob Williams and Stephen Heavner are serving as the DFF Honorary Co-Chairs for 2009.Williams is the co-owner of Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams, and Heavner is the bookkeeper for the well-known furniture company. Club Cabaret will host the afterparty, themed “A New Way of Living.” All attendees to ALFA’s Pr[EVENT] will receive free admittance to this afterparty by showing their Pr[EVENT] ticket stub. Funds raised during the afterparty will be donated back to ALFA’s mission. For more information, call 828-322-1447 ext. 224, email alfadirect@charter.net or visit www.alfainfo.org. on both individuals and families. It draws from a by Lainey Millen & Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff rich history of writings about war and peace across both CHARLOTTE Western and Eastern spiritual and faith traditions and features pipe organ, small concert Kennedy to speak to Guild ensemble and male and female guest soloists. The text is drawn from the words and teachCHARLOTTE — The Charlotte Business ings of Mahatma Gandhi, Jesus Christ, Mother Guild will hold its monthly meeting on June 16 Teresa, the Dalai Lama, the Prophet Isaiah, at 5:30 p.m. at the Crowne Plaza Hotel, 201 S. President Jimmy Carter, Confucius, Buddha McDowell St. Guest speaker for the evening will and the Qur’an. be Elke Kennedy, founder of Sean’s Last Wish. Tickets are $12 in advance and $15 at the Kennedy is known for her tireless work to door. combat hate crimes as a result of her gay son’s For more information or to purchase tickmurder. She has spent much of her time since ets, visit tmgchorus.org. his death working with initiatives within the legislative process and sharing her story to raise It’s good ole summer time! public awareness as a way to educate the public. TRIANGLE — The Geeks and Gaymers of The Foundation was established to be the conNorth Carolina are set to have a rad time over duit for achieving these aims. To find out how to the next couple of months. make a contribution to the Sean’s Last Wish On June 27, the will hold their 2nd Foundation, email assist@seanlastwish.org. Anniversary Party in Raleigh. The next The event will be sponsored by Bill Clarke month, on July 18, get out your communica& Associates, Inc. and Keller Williams Realty. tors and enjoy a Trekkies viewing in Durham. Cost is $15 for CBG Members and $25 for On July 25, hold your arms high while reveling guests and non-members ($5 added for memin a Torchwood Series 3 viewing in Research bers without reservations). Reservations were Triangle Park. due by noon on June 12 by email to businessAll get-togethers are held in private memguild@yahoo.com or by phone to 704-565bers’ homes. 5075. Individuals making reservations who do For more information, email not attend will be charged for the event. ggnc@nc.rr.com. To join this group, visit For more information, visit groups.yahoo.com/group/ggnc. www.charlottebusinessguild.com. TRIAD ALFA to host fundraiser finale WINSTON-SALEM — A county in the Piedmont-Triad area of North Carolina is number one for syphilis cases, The WinstonSalem Journal reported on June 5. Forsyth County, whose county seat is Winston-Salem, reported 70 cases of the infection from January 2009 to May 22, 2009. That’s a significant jump from 2008’s 48 reported cases and 2007’s 31. The 2009 number are preliminary figures from the North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services epidemiology division. Dr. Tim Monroe, director of the Forsyth County Health Department, told The Journal that infection rates usually rise and fall in cycles.According to the daily paper, a national syphilis-elimination projected resulted in a 2002 drop to just one case. “It’s not necessarily abnormal to see these kinds of cycles,” Monroe said. County officials have met to discuss ways to curb increased spread of the infection. They will be targeting the most at-risk populations, including prostitutes and gay and bisexual men and men who have sex with men. HICKORY — AIDS Leadership Foothillsarea Alliance (ALFA) will hold Dining for Friends Pr[EVENT] of the Season on June 19 at Market on Main from 8 p.m.-midnight. Tickets can be purchased at the door for $25. Proceeds from Dining for Friends will directly support the mission and services of ALFA. Over the past couple of months, individuals, couples, churches, businesses, schools, etc. have invited friends, family members and community leaders to parties they’ve hosted all over ALFA’s service area. The hosts and guests have made donations to ALFA as admittance to the parties, and in return, receive a ticket to the finale. Party hosts are eligible for titles, including Most Creative Theme, Most Attended Party, and Most Funds Raised.Winners will be announced at the end of the Pr[EVENT] evening. Guests at the Pr[EVENT] will enjoy a variety of heavy hors d’oeuvres, one complimentary adult beverage, cash bar, and soft drinks. In addition, the event will feature DJ entertainment by DJ Supafly, dancing and several raffles. Hal Row from WHKY 1290 AM will serve as emcee. For $5, enter to win a four-day, three-night stay at a beach house in Holden Beach, Lifestyles Meal package from Market on Main, compliments of John Duke and Market on Main, jewelry from Gold & Silver Recycling Co, Inc., flatware from Belks at Valley Hills, photography sitting by Judy Willis Photography, and more. Enter for a chance of winning a fully furnished dining room, complete with sideboard table, courtesy of Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams, and lighting courtesy of Robert Abbey, Inc. Single tickets are $15, three tickets will be sold for $50. TRIANGLE RALEIGH/DURHAM — The Triangle Gay Men’s Chorus will hold its end-of-season premiere concert performance of “BraveSouls and Dreamers” on June 20 at Pullen Memorial Baptist Church, 1801 Hillsborough St. at 8 p.m. (Raleigh) and June 21 at First Presbyterian Church, 305 Main St. at 3 p.m. (Durham). Text is by Robert Espindola and music by Robert Seeley. “BraveSouls and Dreamers” reflects on the human and spiritual consequences of war, contrasting a prevailing hope for peace with the devastating realities of war and its effect 10 Ten-minute test now available HICKORY — During the week of June 22, ALFA will be providing free, confidential doorto-door and walk-in HIV testing to the general public.ALFA’s rapid HIV test is 99.7 percent accurate and provides results in 10 minutes. These events are in observance of National HIV Testing Day, an annual campaign that encourages individuals to receive voluntary HIV counseling and testing. By providing this service,ALFA is able to reduce the spread of HIV and combat the negative stigma surrounding the issue of HIV/AIDS. This is achieved by allowing individuals to know their status, connecting those who test positive with the necessary medical care and providing accurate and up-to-date HIV/AIDS education. Walk-in testing will be available at ALFA, located at 1120 Fairgrove Church Rd. SE, Suite 28, on June 22-25 from 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and June 26 from 10 a.m.-7 p.m.Walk-in testing WESTERN County tops syphilis cases TGMC are ‘BraveSouls’ C A R O L I N A will also be available at Slades Chapel AME Zion Church, located at 306 Bouchelle St. (Morganton) on June 24 from 4 p.m.-7 p.m. For those who are unable to make it the week of June 22, call ALFA at 828-322-1447, ext. 232 to schedule an appointment for a free test. For more information or to make a donation, visit www.alfainfo.org. STATEWIDE Blogger digs in for long haul STATEWIDE — North Carolina’s own Pam Spaulding has been getting a bit of press lately.According to gaynewsblog.net’s Jose Antonio Vargas, the voice behind one of the most respected gay political blogosphere sites, Pam’s House Blend, has given rise to a particular growing political influence. North Carolina is the only state in the south that has not banned same-sex marriage. An IT manager by day and a 24/7/365 blogger, Spaulding said that “all eyes are on North Carolina now.” Florida,Arizona and California in November passed marriage amendments. Vargas said in late May/early June,“after reports that groups such as NC4Marriage and Christian Action League are organizing a rally in Raleigh to support ‘traditional marriage,’ Spaulding wrote on her blog:‘As predicted, the professional anti-gay forces plan to descend on NC.’” “What she doesn’t write is that, so long as she’s blogging, what happens in North Carolina won’t stay in the Tar Heel State,” Vargas continued. The blogging community has been responsible for staging Join the Impact rallies and other successful initiatives across the country to bring attention to the injustices toward the LGBT community. “In the past, someone like Spaulding would have been relegated to the sidelines. She doesn’t work for national gay rights organizations such as the Human Rights Campaign or the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation. She lives with her partner, Kate, an audiologist, in Durham, far from San Francisco, New York or Washington, where gay activism has been historically based. But now she’s helping shape the agenda, one voice in a chorus of sometimes dissonant, sometimes harmonious, often inyour-face voices that is pushing established gay groups and redefining the meaning of grassroots action in this new media age,” Vargas concluded. Joe Solmonese, HRC’s president, reads Spaulding’s blog regularly. To read the entire story, visit gaynewsblog.net/2009/06/gay-bloggers-voices-rise-inchorus-of.html. Q info: Announce your community event in NC News Notes. email: editor@q-notes.com. see next page > JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 11 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction P R I D E Not for Reproduction 0 9 Triad Pride attracts 1,000 Festival is third annual event in Greensboro people attended the event throughout the day. Dozens of vendors including non-profit organizations, businesses and media by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff packed the small park as festvial-goers listened to singers, watched drag performancGREENSBORO — Community members es and heard activists speak on important from across the Triad — and some as far pieces of legislation. away as Fayetteville — convened in Equality North Carolina, the statewide Downtown Greensboro’s Festival LGBT advocacy Park for a day of entertainment, organization, was at networking, community building the festival collectand fun at the third annual Triad ing signatures for a Pride Festival. postcard campaign Organized by the more than to state legislators. 20-year-old Alternative Resources The group is pushof the Triad, the festival was the ing hard to pass culmination of almost a week’s comprehensive sexworth of events designed to foster uality health educommunity, build awareness and cation and fullyprovide social outlets for the inclusive anti-bulTriad area’s LGBT communities. Photo Credit: Matt Comer lying policies for Organizers estimated that 1,000 or more the state’s public, K-12 schools. 12 Other non-profits present included the Guilford Green Foundation, PFLAG Greensboro, several churches and the Leathermen’s Club. Greensboro Mayor Yvonne Johnson was one of several speakers, including Addison Ore of Triad Health Project, Triad Pride co-chairs Richard Gray and Joshua McCoy,Alternative Resources of the Triad president Paul Marshall and transgender community activist Janice Covington. Event sponsors included Warehouse 29, YES! Weekly, American Express, The Q, the Guilford Green Foundation and PFLAG. Q Triad Pride co-chairs Joshua McCoy (left) and Richard — See more Triad Pride photos at Gray (right) with Alternative Resources of the Triad Q-Notes Online’s photo galleries, president Paul Marshall. Photo Credit: Matt Comer www.q-notes.com/photos/. JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 13 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction C O M M U N I T Y S O U T H Ketner apologizes for ‘outing’ S.C. Republicans Kevin Jennings, former GLSEN exec. joins Safe Schools office by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff The founder and former executive director of the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN) has been appointed to a position in the Obama Administration’s Education Department. Decided on May 19 and announced by the White House on June 1, Winston-Salem, N.C.native Kevin Jennings will become the assistant deputy secretary of education for the department’s Office of Safe and Drug-Free Schools. The office oversees financial assistance for drug and violence prevention and is in charge of developing program policy for the Department of Education. Eliza Byard, GLSEN’s executive director, Openly lesbian pol says U.S., state officials are gay praised her predecessor’s achievement. “This appointment is a tribute to Kevin’s many contributions to education in this country and his commitment to the safety and well being of all students,” she said. Conservatives have expressed their outrage over the appointment.As reported by The Washington Blade,WorldNetDaily, a conservative news website, quoted Linda Harvey of the antigay Mission America; she said it was a “tragedy” that an openly gay person would be appointed to the position. Harvey said Jennings has “had an enormously detrimental impact on the climate in our schools,” The Blade reported. Jennings grew up right outside of Winston-Salem, in small town Lewisville, N.C. He is the son of a Baptist preacher. His memoir, “Mama’s Boy, Preacher’s Son,” recounts his life growing up in conservative North Carolina. He later went to Harvard College, graduating magna cum laude, and moved to New England, where he founded GLSEN. Q Sneak peek: Next issue Be sure to pick up Q-Notes’ 40th Anniversary Stonewall issue,“Red, White & Queer: 40 years of fighting for equality,” on June 27, for an indepth look at Carolinas-centric LGBT history, from where we came from to where we’re going: • Carolinas LGBT movers and shakers: The ones who got us where we are today. • At the ballot box: Openly gay politicians and elected officials throughout the Carolinas • The Carolinas’ MCCs and gayaffirming churches: The past, the present and future Photo Credit: Johannes Jordan, Wikimedia Linda Ketner, an openly lesbian 2008 South Carolina Democratic candidate for Congress, issued an apology on Friday, June 5, for comments she made claiming three Palmetto State Republicans were closeted gays. The bombshell statements were made in a FireDogLake interview on June 1. “We have more gay people serving in South Carolina than probably in any place in the United States; they’re just not out of the closet,” she told blogger Howie Klein.“We have an awful lot of people in the closet — Lindsey Graham, Glenn McConnell who’s our Senate president pro tem, our Lt Governor [André Bauer].” Later in the comment section of the website, Ketner clarified her remarks,“By the way, in Howie’s intro, he quoted me as saying several members of state and U.S. government were gay,” she said.“I don’t know that for sure, having never been intimate with any of them. Those are the rumors.” On June 5, Ketner wrote on her blog:“I’ve always been resolute about never outing anyone, believing strongly that every person gets to decide when or if he or she comes out. I let myself and others down in a recent off-therecord chat with a reporter. I obviously don’t have knowledge of the sexual orientation of any individuals mentioned.What I do have is respect and appreciation for their service to this state.” She added,“My sincerest apologies to any of you rightfully upset with me.” Graham, McConnell and Bauer have all been the subject of rumors claiming they are gay. Those rumors have never been confirmed and the three have either denied it or stayed silent.All three are single. In 2002, a divorce action between Bauer and his wife allegedly accused the official of having an affair with another man. No documents ever surfaced to confirm that rumor. Q-Notes contacted the offices of each of the elected officials and left messages for their spokespersons. Those calls remained unreturned at press time. Washington, D.C., blogger and activist Michael Rogers, who has worked for years outing antigay, closeted politicians, said individuals should be careful making accusations without certainty or proof. “As always, I support the reporting on closeted, anti-gay politicians who work against the interest of the gay community,” he told Q-Notes.“I am careful to only report on cases of which I have 100 percent confidence and encourage others to not use rumors, whether longstanding or recent, as a basis for outing.” Rogers, whose work is showcased in the 2009 film “Outrage,” said South Carolinians should do the appropriate research into allegedly closeted politicians’ records and actions and have all the facts before going public with any evidence. Ketner’s race against Brown was historic. If successful, she would have been the state’s first openly gay or lesbian elected official, along with Charleston’s Nick Shalosky, who won a seat on a constituent school board through a write-in candidacy. Ketner lost her race 52 percent to 48 percent. She is being encouraged to try again in 2010. Q Vote at www.q-notes.com Does openly gay Charlotte City Council candidate Owen Sutkowski have a chance at beating incumbent Patsy Kinsey? JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction C A R O L I N A Winston-Salem native appointed to Education department by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff 14 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 15 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 2 0 0 9 Y ou asked for it. We gave it to you. You voted. The results are in. Q-Notes’ first annual QList — Best of the Carolinas, Readers’ Pick garnered hundreds of submitted ballots and nominations for some of the best restaurants, bars and clubs, community organizations, business and community leaders across the Tar Heel and Palmetto States. CAROLINAS-WIDE Best gay dance club Winner: Scorpio (Charlotte) Runner-up: The G&G Club (Charlotte) Best gay bar Winner: Scorpio (Charlotte) Runners-up: The Cabaret (Columbia), Woodshed Lounge (Charlotte) Best lesbian club/bar Winner: Hartigan’s (Charlotte) Runner-up: The L Word (Cayce/Columbia) Best Leather/Levi club/bar Winner: Eagle (Charlotte) Runner-up: Woodshed Lounge (Charlotte) Best straight, gay-friendly club/bar Winner: Art Bar (Columbia) Honorable Mention: G&G Club (Charlotte), Night Owls (Gastonia), Noma’s Bar & Grill (Winston-Salem), Tutto Mondo (Charlotte) Club/bar with best drink value Winners: Hartigan’s Irish Pub (Charlotte), Scorpio (Charlotte) Honorable Mention: Central Station (Charlotte), Night Owls (Gastonia), Woodshed Lounge (Charlotte) Club/bar with hottest bartenders Winners: The G&G Club (Charlotte), Scorpio (Charlotte) Club/bar with hottest dancers Winner: Chasers (Charlotte) Runner-up: Scorpio (Charlotte) Best place to hook-up Winner: Online Several nominations were given for various hook-up websites. They all tied and included a general answer of “online,” Craigslist and Manhunt. Best place to meet a husband Winner: Online Again, several nominations were given for various websites. Combined, the internet was the best place to meet a husband. Nominations included a general answer of “online,” ruOnQ.com, MySpace and Craigslist. Best place to meet a wife Winner: Hartigan’s Irish Pub (Charlotte) Runner-up: Night Owls (Gastonia) Best drag show Winner: Scorpio (Charlotte) Runner-up: The Cabaret (Columbia) Best overall club/bar in North Carolina Winner: Scorpio (Charlotte) Runner-up: Hartigan’s Irish Pub (Charlotte) Not for Reproduction Q L I S T Best overall club/bar in South Carolina Winners: Art Bar (Columbia), The Cabaret (Columbia), The Castle (Greenville, SC), Hide-A-Way (Rock Hill) All four winners tied. Best LGBT non-profit, North Carolina Winner: Equality NC Runners-up: Regional AIDS Interfaith Network, RAIN (Charlotte), Metrolina AIDS Project, MAP (Charlotte) Best LGBT non-profit, South Carolina Winner: South Carolina Pride Movement Best HIV/AIDS service organization, North Carolina Winner: Regional AIDS Interfaith Network, RAIN (Charlotte) Runner-up: Alliance of AIDS Care Services-Carolina (Raleigh) Best HIV/AIDS service organization, South Carolina Winner: Palmetto AIDS Life Support Services, PALSS (Columbia) Most effective grassroots advocacy Winners: Equality NC (Raleigh), Charlotte Rainbow Action Network for Equality, CRANE (Charlotte) Runner-up: Mike Nelson (Carrboro) Best Pride celebration Winners: NC Pride Fest and Parade (Raleigh/Durham), Pride Charlotte, SC Pride (Columbia) All three winners tied. Best LGBT-specific store Winner: White Rabbit (Charlotte, Raleigh) Runner-up: Paper Skyscraper (Charlotte) Best LGBT-friendly department store Winner: Target Runners-up: Nordstroms, Belk Best gay-friendly, mainstream specialty store Winner: Paper Skyscraper (Charlotte) Best adult-oriented store Winner: White Rabbit (Charlotte, Raleigh) Runners-up: Our Place (Raleigh), Adam and Eve Best pet store Winner: Petsmart Runner-up: Dogma and Fetch (York, S.C.) Qlist the 16 Best of the LGBT C a r o l i n a s Most effective youth outreach efforts Winner: Time Out Youth (Charlotte) Best LGBT young adult leader (under 30) Winner: Ricky Burns II (Charlotte) Runner-up: Ryan Wilson (Columbia) Best LGBT leader (Male) Winner: Ian Palmquist (Raleigh) Runner-up: Ryan Wilson (Columbia) Best LGBT leader (Female) Winner: Mandy Carter Honorable Mention: Pamela Jones (Charlotte), Janet Joyner (Winston-Salem), Addison Ore (Greensboro), Terri Pheonix (Chapel Hill), Tonyia Rawls (Charlotte) Best LGBT politican/elected official Winner: Wade Boyles (Winston-Salem) see next page > JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction LOCAL/REGIONAL: CHARLOTTE Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned restaurant Winner: Dish Runner-up: 300 East Best LGBT-friendly, late-night restaurant Winner: Skyland Runner-up: Hartigan’s Irish Pub Best LGBT-friendly cheap eat Winner: The Penguin Runner-up: Hartigan’s Irish Pub Best LGBT-friendly, locallyowned coffee shop Winner: Smelly Cat Coffee House Honorable Mention: Caribou Coffee (East Blvd.) Caribou Coffee actually received more votes than Smelly Cat. Technically, Caribou isn’t locally-owned, but it got so many votes, it definitely deserves an honorable mention. Best gay/lesbian club/bar Winner: Scorpio Runner-up: Hartigan’s Irish Pub Best drag performer Winner: Roxy C. Moorecox Runner-up: Tiffany Storm Best LGBT non-profit Winner: Regional AIDS Interfaith Network, RAIN Runner-up: Time Out Youth Best LGBT young adult leader (under 30) Winners: Ricky Burns II, Clay Smith Best LGBT leader (Male) Winner: Clay Smith Best LGBT leader (Female) Winners: Pamela Jones, Debbie Warren Best LGBT-affirming faith institution Winners: Metropolitan Community Church of Charlotte, New Life Metropolitan Community Church Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 17 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 2 0 0 9 Not for Reproduction Q L I S T continued from previous page LOCAL/REGIONAL: TRIANGLE (RALEIGH, DURHAM, CHAPEL HILL) Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned restaurant Winners: Blue Corn Café (Durham), The Burough (Raleigh), Mad Hatter’s Bake Shop (Durham), Rue Cler Restaurant and Bakery Café (Durham), Frazier’s Bistro (Raleigh) Best LGBT-friendly, late-night restaurant Winner: The Borough (Raleigh) Runner-up: Dain’s Place (Durham) Best LGBT-friendly cheap eat Winner: The Borough (Raleigh) Runners-up: Elmo’s Diner (Durham), Mediterranean Deli (Chapel Hill) Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned coffee shop Winner: The Third Place Coffee House (Raleigh) Best gay/lesbian club/bar Winners: CC (Raleigh), Steel Blue (Durham) Runner-up: Legends Best drag performer Winners: Liliana, Dana St. James Best LGBT non-profit Winner: Equality NC Best LGBT young adult leader (under 30) Winner: Justin Smith Best LGBT leader (Male) Winners: Brian Ammons, Ian Palmquist Best LGBT leader (Female) Winners: Mandy Carter, Terri Pheonix Best LGBT-affirming faith institution Winners: Pullen Memorial Baptist Church (Raleigh), St. John’s Metropolitan Community Church (Raleigh) Runner-up: Calvary United Methodist Church (Durham) 18 LOCAL/REGIONAL: TRIAD (GREENSBORO, WINSTON- SALEM, HIGH POINT) Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned restaurant Winner: West End Café (Winston-Salem) Best LGBT-friendly, late-night restaurant Winner: Jan’s House (Greensboro) Best LGBT-friendly cheap eat Winner: Mellow Mushroom Pizza Bakers (Winston-Salem) Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned coffee shop Winner: Caffe Prada (Winston-Salem) Best gay/lesbian club/bar Winner: Club Odyssey (Winston-Salem) Runner-up: Warehouse 29 (Greensboro) Best drag performer Winner: Cass Westbrook Runner-up: Paisley Parque Best LGBT non-profit Winner: PFLAG Winston-Salem Runner-up: Triad Health Project Best LGBT young adult leader (under 30) Winner: Kate Mabe Best LGBT leader (Male) Winner: Wade Boyles Runner-up: Thomas Farmer Best LGBT leader (Female) Winner: Susan Parker Best LGBT-affirming faith institution Winner: Wake Forest Baptist Church (Winston-Salem) Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned coffee shop Winner: Adriana’s Café and Gelateria Best gay/lesbian club/bar Winner: H20 Runner-up: The Cabaret Best drag performer Winner: Patti O’Furniture Runner-up: Prince Dryden Best LGBT non-profit Winner: Impact Columbia Runner-up: South Carolina Pride Movement Best LGBT young adult leader (under 30) Winner: Santi Thompson Runner-up: Ryan Wilson Best LGBT leader (Male) Winner: John Dawkins Runner-up: Ed Madden Best LGBT leader (Female) Winner: Beth Sherouse Runners-up: Harriet Hancock, Nekki Shutt Best LGBT-affirming faith institution Winner: Garden of Grace United Church of Christ Runner-up: Unitarian Universalist Church of Columbia Q — Results compiled by Q-Notes staff from qualified online ballots collected April 3-May 13. ••••••••••• Local/Regional: Columbia Best LGBT-friendly, locally-owned restaurant Winner: Hunter Gatherer Best LGBT-friendly, late-night restaurant Winner: The Whig Runner-up: Pop’s NY Pizza Best LGBT-friendly cheap eat Winner: The Whig Thanks... ...to Q-Notes production intern Tim Dill, who has diligently worked with our staff for the past eight weeks. The QList logo you see gracing the pages of this issue — and so many other behind-the-scenes accomplishments — are the result of Tim’s imaginative work and creativity. Thanks so much, TIm, for all your hard work! JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 19 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction P R I D E Not for Reproduction 0 9 Excited about Pride Pride Charlotte organizers plan for record event, anti-gays plan counter by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff CHARLOTTE — Organizers of one of the largest LGBT Pride festival between Washington, D.C., and Atlanta are gearing up for what they anticipate as another record year of growth. Kicking off at the end of July, Pride Charlotte brings with it a host of activities and events. The mainstay of each year’s Pride celebrations, the Pride Charlotte Festival, will take place on Saturday, July 25 at Uptown’s Gateway Village. Anti-gay religious organizations are also gearing up. The Coalition of Conscience, led by Dr. Michael Brown of FIRE Church and School of Ministry in Concord, N.C., is planning a 1,000strong “God Has a Better Way” worship and prayer event. “What we hope to accomplish is to send another message to the city and to the lesbian and gay community, in conjunction with the gay pride event, that is really a message of God’s love and God’s goodness,” Brown told Q-Notes. Brown said his group doesn’t plan on doing any public preaching, as has been the case with past anti-gay protests of Pride Charlotte and other LGBT events. “We plan to be engaging primarily in worship and prayer,” he said.“We do not plan on being disruptive of the event itself. The goal is to send a message that God does have a better way and to surround the event with an atmosphere of worship and God’s presence.” Clay Smith, one of Pride Charlotte’s 2009 co-chairs, told Q-Notes that Pride is about celebration and shouldn’t be about the conflict it might create among certain portions of the Charlotte community. “We want everyone to be excited about Pride and not necessarily the conflict that it brings,” he said.“We aren’t necessarily making a political statement.We are putting on a festival to celebrate who we are.” Brown, whose group is the sole organizer of the counter “God Has a Better Way” event, said he will be getting the word out however he can. He said those participating in his event are churches and individuals who “share a heart of love for the gay and lesbian community,” adding that,“under no circumstances will anyone be allowed to participate who does not share the same heart.” Smith said the Pride Charlotte festival is a family-oriented event and that anti-gay protesters really have no reason to be offended by the festival.“You won’t see nude artists or nude art.You won’t hear vulgar language from the stage. Those are things to celebrate.” He added,“We are there to have a good time. I encourage everyone to come out and have fun.” Organizers have already planned to counter any resistance they receive from protesters. As in years past, the “Partners in Peace” will help to keep anti-gay protesters from interrupting the festival, which is being held on 20 private property. “Speaking as someone who attended the festival last year, the Partners in Peace handled the protesters very smoothly,” Smith said.“I can only imagine that it will be handled with the same professionalism and grace this year.” Smith said last year’s festival set record attendance and that organizers “would love to see that surpassed this year.” Entertainment at the day-long festival includes musician and poet Amy Steinberg, singers Brendan Velasquez, Chrys Matthews, Rodie Ray and Joshua Klipp, dancers Daniel The phantom’s return page 23 A memoir filled with joy Aging N.C. writer revisits his youthful adventures at Oxford, his journey home DURHAM — In a world crowded with day, he taught a class on John Milton and finlittle more depressed than I am, but I can’t memoirs recounting every sort of human ished his daily physical therapy, required to quite manage it.” trial, Reynolds Price’s new book,“Ardent stimulate blood circulation in his legs. Later, He crossed his legs — grabbing a pants leg, Spirits,” stands out lifting, resting ankle on oppobecause of what it’s not. site knee — and explained It’s not a tale of adverwhy he wrote his new memoir: sity or pain or loss. It is, “I had loved those years of my like its author, full of stolife so much.” ries funny and wise. The A new life at Oxford book brings alive a time “Ardent Spirits” begins in in post-World War II 1955 as a 22-year-old Price, England when a promisN.C. born and bred, says gooding young scholar could bye to his widowed mother have coffee with poet and brother, boards an ocean W.H.Auden, then run liner and heads to England. into J.R.R. Tolkien as he Once there, he moves into strolled to the bus stop. Merton College and finds, to Price, 76, has taught his dismay, that 40 degrees English at Duke constitutes a reasonably warm University, his alma mater, room in midfor 51 years. He has pubwinter Britain. lished more than three He invests in dozen books, won awards, sweaters and been inducted into the spends huge Reynolds Price speaks at a 2007 ceremony awarding him the Thomas Wolfe amounts to run American Academy of Prize at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill. Arts and Letters. a space heater, Photo Credit: Allie Mullin/UNC Department of English and Comparative Literature He has also survived causing a friend spinal cancer, though the treatment that saved he would teach a seminar on the gospels of to quip that he’s growing his life in the mid-’80s left him in a wheelchair, Mark and John. orchids and iguanas. a paraplegic, dependent on live-in assistants. Nearby, Price’s assistant, a recent Duke “My prodigality kept me at Now,North Carolina’s venerable man of letgraduate, waited until needed. least from perishing of cold,” he ters returns to some of the most colorful years in Each year Price hires a new assistant, makwrites,“and I took a certain his life — from 1955,when he begins studies as ing it clear the job will last only 12 months “so pleasure in being something of a Rhodes scholar,to 1961,when he completes they don’t get trapped in some old man’s illan outrageous college pet — his first novel,“A Long and Happy Life.” The ness and heartbreak.” the Man Who Craves Heat.” book,out Tuesday,is getting good reviews.James Price lives with physical pain. But despite “Ardent Spirits” is full of Schiff,author of “Understanding Reynolds the pain, the wheelchair and his quip about such gems, evocative stories about friends, Price,” calls it Price’s most compelling work since heartbreak, he’s a man with a glass-half-full professors and his landlady,Win, whose colorhis award-winning 1986 novel,“Kate Vaiden.” disposition, full of gratitude and good cheer. ful expressions would provide Price rich mateOn a recent spring afternoon, Price took a “I love to laugh, love my friends, my famirial for his fiction. (When Price once combreak in his Duke office between classes. That ly,” he said.“There are times when I try to get a mented on a homely woman,Win quipped: Gray and the Beledi Beat Dancers and the Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte and One Voice Chorus, among others. The event will feature more than 100 vendors including businesses and non-profits, food vendors, a children’s area, DJ tent, beer and other refreshments and two stages for entertainment. Pride Charlotte organizers have been holding several Pride Charlotte Pageantry System preliminaries. The winners of the preliminaries will compete at a final pageant at Scorpio on July. The winner of the final will be crowned Miss Pride Charlotte. Sponsors and a full slate of official events have yet to be officially announced; Q-Notes plans on being an event sponsor. In-depth: ‘God Has a Better Way’ Dr. Michael Brown of the Coalition of Conscience will hold “God Has a Better Way”on July 25, from Noon to 3 p.m.According to the event’s website, those who will be a part of the group’s prayer and outreach teams will meet at First Baptist Church on Davidson St. in Uptown at 11 a.m. Others will meet there at Noon for prayer and instructions and walk to their final destination for worship and more prayer. Brown told Q-Notes he was unsure of the final destination for the event.As this story was being completed at press time, Q-Notes was unable to reach city officials in charge of event and protest permitting. Their website says the group is looking for “worshipers, intercessors, musicians, soulwinners, walkers, talkers and believers.” The Coalition of Conscience is expecting 1,000 or more participants. More information on the event and Coalition of Conscience can be found online at www.godhasabetterway.com and www.coalitionofconscience.org. Q — For more on Pride activities in Charlotte and across the Carolinas visit Q-Notes’ Pride 2009 website at www.q-notes.com/pride/. “Well you don’t look at the mantel while you’re poking the fire, now do you?”) Through connections, location and luck, Price also runs into famous people regularly. Brigitte Bardot turns up in front of him in a movie theater. The room he rents from his landlady is just down the road from Tolkien’s house. British writer Sir Stephen Spender accompanies him to a 1957 production of “Titus Andronicus,” starring Vivien Leigh and husband Laurence Olivier.Afterward, as they greet Leigh backstage, she encourages them to say hello to Larry, still in his dressing room. They knock, and one of world’s great actors opens the door,“naked as jay.” Like “Clear Pictures,” a memoir of his childhood, and “A Whole New Life,” the story of his cancer and recovery, Price’s new book benefits from his potent memory for conversations and details. Price isn’t a journal keeper, but when he checked recollections against letters he sent his mother during his Oxford years, he found only tiny discrepancies. This cheered him, he said, because he remembers the scandal over James Frey’s memoir fabrications in “A Million Little Pieces.” “Oprah had made such a deal about that guy a few years ago, I thought,‘Don’t tell a single lie.You’ll get caught.’” A ‘fervent erotic relation’ In “Ardent Spirits,” Price also writes about being a gay man, though he prefers the term “queer.” He held off until now, he said, because “I wanted to be very careful about not invading see Writer on 27 www.q-notes.com/qliving • QNotes JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction by Pam Kelley . The Charlotte Observer Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Q - L I V I N G A love song no one knows is gay “Jersey Boys” — It is a classic American tale, straight out of the 1960s. Recounting the life and times of the hit group the Four Seasons, this musical is a favorite among old and young alike. The musical will run in Raleigh June 24 through July 18 at Progress Energy Center. QNotes had the opportunity to speak to Jonathan Hadley, who plays the Four Seasons’ bisexual producer Bob Crewe.A Charlotte 22 native and Myers Park High School graduate, the openly gay Hadley attended the University of North Carolina School of the Arts in Winston-Salem and has been performing live for two decades now. Tell us a little bit about you. How’d you get involved in theater? It all started when I was five years old. I worked with the Charlotte Children’s Theatre and the Central Piedmont Summer Theatre. I Q - L I V I N G ‘Phantom’ returns to the Queen City by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff did all that through high school and in college did a lot of classical training, which was fantastic. I moved to New York and just started auditioning. One of my first jobs was in the original tour of “Into the Woods.” I got to work with Steven Sondheim and Charlotte Ray and all these wonderful people right out of school. That was a real gift. When did you join up with the “Jersey Boys” tour, and how is life Actor DC Anderson on Monsieur André by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff For the first time since 2001,the longest-running Broadway musical makes its triumphant return to Charlotte:“The Phantom of the Opera” Photo Credit: Joan Marcus Jonathan Hadley (left) as Bob Crewe on the road? I’ve been on the road now almost a year. Right now I’m in Ft. Lauderdale — I’m forcing myself to enjoy it. It has been a nice little change. It is great being on the road, though, and interesting to see how the show plays in different cities. That’s been fun. You play Bob Crewe in the musical. Most people who maybe grew up listening to the Four Season or folks who hear them now have no idea who Bob is. What is it that drew you to the character? I knew probably about as much as you do or anyone else — which was nothing (laughs). Immediately after I got the script, though, I was connected to the writing. It is such a great script. The writers have done a wonderful job creating and telling the stories of these characters. They are real people. Bob Crewe was their lyricist, manager and producer. He was really instrumental in creating that signature Four Seasons sound. Bob is described as the group’s “flamboyant” producer. Come on, we all know that’s a big code word for gay. Back in April, a writer for The South Florida Blade, said Crewe’s character is “the diva of Jersey Boys.” Does Bob’s identity as gay or bi show through in the musical at all? Absolutely, it does.And as how Bob would identity himself is up to him. There is an accompanying book to the musical they sell in the lobby. It tells the story of the Four Seasons and the making of “Jersey Boys.” In that, Crewe identifies himself as bisexual. Perhaps if we saw him today, we’d probably immediately identify him as a gay man, but this was 1963. Perceptions were quite different. I was reading an interview you gave with InsideOut in Nashville this past March. You talked a little bit about the origin for “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You.” Tell our readers about that story. I love that story! I found out about it once I joined the company.Personally,I have not met Bob Crewe,but we have emailed.Others have related this story to me,though.“Can’t Take My Eyes Off You”was probably the most successful pop song in the history of pop music and no one even knows it was a gay love song! Bob Crewe was trying to figure out the lyrics,pacing the floor at night in his apartment and turned and saw his young lover lying in the bed.The words came to him immediately.He wrote the whole thing that night,to a young lover.I just love it. What do you think is the underlying, compelling human story told by “Jersey Boys” through the story of its real life characters? That’s a good question (laughs). Ultimately, it is a story of perseverance. Frankie and Bob Gaudio were just so struggling. It is also a story of friendship — you see these guys’ friendship get them through a lot. Q JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Bruce Winant as Firmin and D.C. Anderson as André in ‘The Phantom of the Opera’ Photo Credit: Joan Marcus will run at the Blumenthal Performing Arts Center in Uptown,June 10-July 5. Q-Notes had the opportunity to speak to actor D.C.Anderson, who plays one of the two theatre managers, Monsieur André. Born in Chicago and raised outside of Cleveland, Ohio, Anderson has been performing and acting for decades. The veteran is more than excited to come down to Charlotte for his first ever visit to the Queen City. How did you get started in acting and musicals? When I was in the sixth grade, I just knew that I wanted to be an actor.At the time I was pretty much taken up with the idea of the attention an actor gets or something. I remember cutting out a picture of an Academy Awards winner from TV Guide and I put it on my dresser. My mom asked about, why I had cut it out. I told her,“It’ll sit there until the real one takes its place.” (laughs) So your parents were supportive of your performing ambitions then? Yes, my parents were supportive.When I was in seventh grade I auditioned for a community play. I was horrible. It was “Gideon” by Paddy Chayefsky. I played the little boy with Gideon. In the play, God is a character but the only person who sees him or hears him is Gideon. The man playing the voice of God had this loud, booming voice and every time he spoke, I shook. It kind of got rid of the idea that God couldn’t be heard by anyone else. (laughs) In “Phantom” you play the character Monsieur André. He and the other manager are two characters that audiences come to kind of love and hate. You just can’t help but love them, because they can be so funny. What do you see in your character, from the other side of the stage? I think he is a lot like me. I kind of put together this back story of him, that isn’t really a part of the play. (laughs) His mother was a voice teacher and she used to teach opera singers and put me in my baby basket under the piano so she could keep an eye on me when she was teaching. I grew up to love the opera and had this dream of owning the Paris Opera. Low and behold, I meet this other guy, Firmin, who has the resources to take over a theater.We form a partnership when the old owner vacates his position. Of course, we don’t know why he is leaving, but it is certainly a boon for me. But the place is haunted and people are dying and we are just trying to keep the performances alive. The two characters are just two people working very hard to keep opera alive in Paris, while the performers are dying all around them. So, you’ve never been to Charlotte? No, but I’m really looking forward to it. I have a friend who performed there. He liked it so much that he actually purchased a condo and is planning to return there for retirement. Well, you’ll be here for four weeks. You’ll definitely have to get out and see the town. That’ll be great! Q JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 23 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Q - L I V I N G Q - L I V I N G On being a gay parent General Gayety by Brett Webb-Mitchell by Leslie Robinson Contributing Writer Gay Parents’ Day? I was mesmerized by the conversation around the Church’s governing board as we discussed what we would give the men of the congregation for Father’s Day.As a pastor for over 25 years, I’ve heard this conversation many times, always with the same formula being used: the “mothers” — a.k.a., all women in the church regardless of whether or not they have children — will get a carnation on Mother’s Day. Fathers — meaning all men in the church — will get an industrial drafting pencil for their workshop. This discussion focused on a charming deviation from the norm: giving men a small pocket size carabiner that would possibly have the church’s name printed on them.“Nice gift,” I said with an almost imperceptible measure of incredulity in the tone of my voice. No one seemed to notice this around the table. As I thought about this inaugural column, it was this awkward event that sprung to mind: being in the middle of this conversation and feeling out of place with these gifts for Mother’s and Father’s Days, even as a dad of two children. I wouldn’t have minded the carnation myself. I like a live flower or a small bouquet of wild flowers on my desk, kitchen windowsill, dining table, on a bedside table to look at in the morning when first rousing. The last thing I need is a small carabiner or many of the other token gifts associated with men in a congregation. In our society — in and out of communities of faith — we fall easily to the preconceived notions and ideas of what it means to be a mom and a dad, regardless if we are gay or straight.And gifts on these days reflect the assumptions of both gender and parenting we live with daily, passing them down from one generation to the next. It was at this church meeting that it struck me: What is it that we who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender who are moms and dads want on these specially carved out days of the American hit parade of holidays? How do we want to be recognized? Should we establish a Gay Parents’ Day? What are the cards we would purchase for one another or that our children would purchase? What would be the image on the front of a card? Would it play into stereotypes of gay dads going to Broadway shows with our children in hand? Lesbian moms and children all wearing matching flannel clothes? As Mother’s and Father’s Days were created in the early part of the 20th century as society’s way of honoring our parents, consider what it would mean to carve out and honor LGBTQ parents with a Gay Parents’ Day. Perhaps, for a short time, we would honor those LGBTQ parents in our society for being pioneers in a day and age when the only visible role models of parenting were straight parents.While there will be some commercialization of the day — with appropriate cards for the occasion — it would be a day of telling our story of what it was and is like being a gay parent in a world largely populated by straight parent images.We would tell of how we are singled out in public schools as the “lesbian parents” while no one describes the others as “straight parents.” We would describe the small jabs our children live with in their social groups when others find out that their parents are gay. And, we would describe the joys and often the normalcy of simply being family. As more states pass equal rights marriage bills or legislation for domestic civil unions, I hereby propose one day of the year in which we honor LGBTQ parents and families. Happy Gay Parent Day to one and all! Q Fighting the good fight against DADT only online • Men’s Health & Wellness • Keeping it ‘Real’ – Vanessa Williams • Money Matters more at q-notes.com! 24 JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction It feels like a whole lot of nothing is happening in Washington to rid us of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” The President hasn’t rushed to fulfill his campaign promise to kick the policy to the curb. Some administration officials can’t even see the curb. On Capitol Hill, Democratic Sen. Edward Kennedy has been unable to find a Republican colleague to cosponsor a bill lifting the ban. It’s time for the gay community to adopt a new approach. Let’s stop arguing that allowing gays and lesbians to serve openly in the United States military is a matter of civil rights or fairness. Let’s abandon logic and cease pointing out how harmful it is to our national security that the military keeps ejecting, for instance,Arab linguists. Let’s emphasize that this policy makes the U.S.A. inferior. To Uruguay. Yes, that petite Latin American country is now ahead of us, having moved to lift its ban on gays in the military. It’s a blow to our national pride.We’re lagging behind a country that, on a map, looks like the buttocks of South America. Uruguay’s gay ban was a relic of the 1973-85 military dictatorship. The law included homosexuality among the “mental illnesses and disorders” that made a person unfit for the armed forces. The new decree says sexual orientation is no longer grounds to keep people from joining the military. Altogether now, I want to hear every red-blooded American chant,“We’re not number one! We’re not number one!” We’re not number two either. Scads of countries have leaped ahead of us. It’s just plain embarrassing. Earlier this year another South American nation, Argentina, jettisoned its ban on gays in the military. Days later the Philippines did the same.What a week. Not one, but two countries outdistanced us.We earned ourselves a double helping of humble pie. Really, that week should have been enough to get Americans hopping mad over being trumped by countries that don’t have the decency to revere football. The gay community played it wrong.We shouldn’t have calmly pointed out that nations around the world are making the sensible choice for their militaries. Instead, we should’ve harangued our fellow Americans, shamed them, demanded to know how they can put up with being left in the dust by countries no one can spell. After attacking their patriotism, it might’ve been advantageous to question their bravery, too. These podunk countries aren’t afraid of change.Are Americans so lily-livered that we’re paralyzed by homos serving openly? Is the strongest military in the world actually made up of a bunch of wusses? In addition to Uruguay,Argentina and the Philippines, other countries that have shot ahead of us include Canada, Israel,Australia, Switzerland, the United Kingdom and more. My favorite is Bermuda. The Bermuda Regiment doesn’t discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation and Regiment members aren’t allowed to harass gay soldiers. In actuality, discrimination within the ranks is tolerated, but at least the teeny island nation has seen fit to put an affirmative policy in place. Which means that we’ve been bested by a military whose fiercest enemy is persistent seagulls. There’s another way of looking at this issue.Instead of focusing on those nations that allow gays to serve in the military,we could focus on those that explicitly ban them.“Don’t Ask,Don’t Tell”isn’t precisely a ban,but it’s close,so we have much in common with Egypt,Syria,Peru,Singapore and others. The others include Cuba, Iran and North Korea.Axis of Evil party boys.“Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” has us keeping company with the enemy. Blech. Q info: LesRobinsn@aol.com . www.GeneralGayety.com JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 25 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Q - L I V I N G Drag Rag by Miss Della . Contributing Writer Pageant news, wisdom and sentiment abound! Oh, kids, here I go again — rounding up the tea from coast to coast and we have so much to cover in such short time and space.We have two new national titleholders to welcome, as well as a plethora of local contests as well. Digging right in,congrats are in order for LaWanda Jackson,our newest Miss Classic U.S.ofA.LaWanda,as you know,is a former Miss Scorpio.Her runners-up were Amber Nixx,Kofi, Nicole DuBois,Sharde Ross (a former Miss NC America),Penny Holiday,Dina Jacobs (not Dena Cass as I mentioned in the last Rag,thank you), Alexis LaRue,Camille Lamour,Christiana Sinclair,Jewel Holiday and Christina Chase. The following Friday night, a fierce Stasha Sanchez delivered a talent production worthy of the Miss Gay U.S.ofA. crown. She wore it out that night and got a standing ovation to boot. Her RUs included Natasha Braxton, Coti Collins, Dorae Saunders and Dominique Sanchez. The others in Top 12 were Leyla Edwards O’Hara, Sahara Davenport, Taryn Taylor, Naomi St. James, Tiffany Richards, Amaya Mann and Teonia Steele. Dorae and Coti got perfect scores in Interview. The Best NonFinalist and Most Beautiful was Angel Cavalli. Winners of prelims in other systems include Visa D’Kline, the new Eastern Michigan Regional EOY and Miss Iowa U.S.ofA. at Large Melissa Monet with RU Nova Starr. Tiffany McCray is the new Miss Southeast Continental held in Orlando at Revolution and some old news that I forgot to mention — Malaysia Black is Miss Atlanta World International. On the same night, Monte St. James won the Mr. and Tahjee Iman won the At-Large contest. Her RU was Amaya. Miss Heart of America, the most recent prelim to Miss Gay America, was won by Coco Montrese. Her RU was Sasha Leigh Chambers. On the local scene, Jessica Jade is the new Miss Triad Pride and her RUs were Malayia Chanel and On-stage winner was Janice Covington. That same night, the Mr. contest was held and Mystic Parque won with RU Gemini Walker. Miss Mecklenburg County America is Starla DaVinci with RU Detra Penucci. Miss Raleigh is Vanessa Cottrell. The new Miss Scandals is Vivica Dupree with RUs Manhattan and Forbidden. Recent winners to Miss Zodiac include Miss Aries Adrian Griffin and her RU Natalie Rodriguez and Miss Taurus Sierra Leone with RU Carmendy. Felicia Monet won Miss Scorpio Pride. In closing, I wanted to mention a conversation I had with our Miss NC U.S.ofA., Brooke Divine, on her first trip ever to a national contest. This young queen has been performing for eight years, and while she has come a long way and achieved many dreams, as it turns out, she was not quite ready for what she would be thrust into at Miss Gay U.S.ofA.As it ends up, winning wasn’t what she thought it would be — it ended up being a “headache and a broken heart.” Regardless, she says it’s still a job and she has goals and views on how to help the system return to it’s former glory.A reference she has made in an interview before would be that of The House of NC. She doesn’t want to tear down what has been built by the former winners and promoters, she wants to build and make it stronger and go in and clean or gussy things up.Another aspect she wants to focus on would be to help the younger impersonators reach the very goal she has attained. She considers herself approachable and humble and wants to inspire others because people always “speculate and exaggerate.” She advises young queens to be strong so they can reach their goals.As for her experience on the national level, she says it was completely different from watching it on YouTube or a DVD.Without the support team that most girls in the Top 12 had, she says the experience was overwhelming. Her fears were alleviated by meeting wonderful, caring people who seemed to care and wanted to see others do Q - L I V I N G well. She also thinks in hindsight that one needs years of experience, planning and promoting, too. She also says she had a blast! Brooke has asked me to thank several folks who have helped her possibly in the past, present or maybe even in the future, like NC U.S.ofA. pageantry, all former Misses NC, Zodiac Entertainment,Augusta II, Teresa, Jerry Bird, U.S.ofA. system, myself, Tamisha Iman, Erika Norell,Alyssa Edwards, Tommie Ross, Shae Shae LaReese, Tanisha Cassadine, Tajma Hall, Ron Tankersley and the national office for helping her reach her dreams.Also, to Amber Rochelle, Tracy Morgan (RIP), Sasha, Petite de Jonville,Amaya and to all of her friends who go unnamed for the love and support through the years that all of them have given in so many different ways. Brooke will be travelling as Miss NC U.S.ofA. until her step-down and afterwards plans to move on to the next phase in her career. She’s planning on moving eventually and returning to college. The move would be to allow her to spread her wings and succeed. Finally, it is with heavy heart that I learned of the passing of a legend in our own time, Miss Farrah McCrae of VA. She was probably one of the winningest female impersonators in the industry ever. Outside of the hundreds of crowns that she won in her career, probably two of the most popular would be Miss NC U.S.ofA. and Miss Classique. Lord, rest her soul. Q info: Drop me a line, OK? . The TeaMissD@yahoo.com Writer revisits youthful adventures at Oxford from page 21 anyone else’s privacy or making anyone more unhappy than seemed necessary.” Now that many in his past are dead, he treats the subject straight on. He had known he was attracted to men since he was teenager, he writes, though as a young man, he was hardly promiscuous. His total number of sexual acts was so low it “would have shamed a robust Chaucerian friar.” In Oxford, he had his first “quite fervent erotic relation” with a man eight years older. “Despite the fact that I’d turned 25 in February, it was my first experience of employing my body in one of its grandest jobs.” Later, back in North Carolina for his military draft physical, he fills out a questionnaire asking,“Do you now have or have you ever had…?” followed by a list that includes measles, epileptic seizures, syphilis, nervous breakdown, prison sentence, homosexual relations. He checks all appropriate boxes, prompting a young Navy doctor to point to “homo- sexual relations” and ask:“Have you consulted a psychiatrist about this problem?” “Sir,” Price replies,“I’ve never felt the need.” Then, in a comic moment of overkill, he hands the Navy man a letter from his family physician attesting to his “lifetime history of serious respiratory allergies.” Minutes later, the doctor tells him he’s unfit for military service. To this day, Price said, he’s not sure if it was homosexuality or allergies that kept him out of the service. Either way,“I don’t think I’ve ever heard a sentence that I more enjoyed hearing.” From England to Durham The subtitle of “Ardent Spirits” is “Leaving Home, Coming Back.” As it suggests, Price’s story comes full circle. He leaves North Carolina to see the world, but comes home to make a career at Duke. He sails to Oxford to study Milton, then returns to teach in Durham for the rest of his career. On a recent morning, Price sat before more than 20 undergraduates who spent the spring studying Milton with him. Price was a Duke student himself when he fell in love with Milton’s ornate language.At Oxford, he wrote his thesis on “Samson Agonistes.” (And, in a tidbit of interest to his students, he explains in his memoir how illness and procrastination nearly caused him to miss his thesis deadline.) In class, Price spoke Samson’s lines in his rich baritone — “This one prayer yet remains, might I be heard, No long petition — speedy death” — sounding, indeed, like an Oxfordeducated intellect. But that formidable persona didn’t linger. The discussion grew lively as Price lobbed questions and students offered answers on the motivations of Dalila, Samson’s estranged wife. Price, too, had a few thoughts about the couple.“Apparently,” he said,“they were good sexual partners.” More to accomplish On days he’s not teaching, Price usually writes; but with a book tour beginning, he’s taking a break. He plans to return to his desk midsummer.“I haven’t finished accomplishing what I want to accomplish.” He wants to write, especially, about surviving 25 years of chronic pain. He still hears from readers inspired and encouraged by “A Whole New Life,” his memoir of cancer and recovery. He continues to live by a bit of wisdom learned at Oxford, from a professor quoting his mother on her deathbed.“I only regret my economies,” she told her son. Price’s interpretation is this: Do what you want to do, love the people you want to love. Splurge when you can. “Few things I’ve heard,” he writes,“have ever been wiser or of greater use in my own long life; and I pass the story on, every chance I get, to my younger friends and students – the story and the words it embodies (with a pronoun change): You’ll only regret your economies.” Q — Originally published in The Charlotte Observer, May 10, 2009. Reprinted with permission. Triangle Area Around The Carolinas 26 JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 27 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Q - L I V I N G Tell Trinity by Trinity . Contributing Writer items from your life together. It also takes finding new friends or connecting with old (pre-war relationship) ones. Being single, then a couple then back to single again is like being Miss Scarlet then Mrs. Scarlet O’Hara-Butler then just Miss O’Hara alone, with a whole plantation to care for. (Check out my cartoon and see how to grab a handful of dirt from Tara and dig in, oh, I mean, move on.) Dear Trinity, I just started dating someone who’s into leather and uniforms. I’m not “vanilla,” but I’m really not into all that stuff. Do you think this could work out or am I wasting my time dealing with someone else’s fetishes? Yours, Fetish Foes, Chicago, Ill. Dear FF, Doesn’t it seem like everyone’s either into something, getting out of something or getting handcuffed to something? Now, just before you say “no” to cottons, leathers or polyesters, I must tie you down to a few questions. First, could you try being open to his or her desires if it was just once in a while, knowing that everyone has some “thing” wild about themselves and most people only practice their wild side once in a while? Second, could he or she be allowed to have a “fetish” while you’d be allowed to not have one? Besides opposites do slap, I mean attract.And, lastly, darling, are you a fool for not wanting to date a cop, soldier, sailor and/or cowboy all rolled into one? Hello Trinity, My boyfriend drives too fast. We fight about it all the time. Do you have any witty suggestions to get him to slow down? Thanks, Driving Hell, Portland, Ore. Hello Driving Hell, Besides reading a book or laying down in the backseat while he drives, you may also want to take your own car. Otherwise, pumpkin, try reading him: Get married first! Live together! Help! Hey Trinity, My boyfriend wants to live together first before getting married. I was raised differently. Should people live together before marriage? Marriage Tryouts, New Haven, Conn. Hey Marriage Tryouts, Unless your parents are generously wealthy and religious and bribing you to marry first, why not start by living together? Gay couples in most states are not allowed to marry, yet live together with lots of success. It gives great insight into what you’ll be fearing, I mean facing. Honey, in the days before Woodstock and free love, couples were expected to marry first. Now, the opposite is not only acceptable, it’s respectable. Before I say,“I do,” I always try living together first just to make sure I’m not getting an oversexed musclehead. Hey, that doesn’t sound so bad! Dearest Trinity, After five years together he moved out. I’m trying to move on with my life, but everything I own has memories of our relationship. We even share friends. Any ideas on moving on? Forward March, Columbus, Ohio Dearest Forward March, Moving on after a relationship of any amount of time and emotional value takes Trinity’s Speedy Tips For Knowing When You’re Driving Too Fast (You’re on the highway and…) weeks, months, sometimes even a year or more (if you’re crazy). Moving on takes endurance, self-esteem and most importantly, sweetie, it takes removing all memorable 28 1. Everyone appears to be driving real slow. 2. The passengers in your car are shaking and crying. 3. People are waving at you to slow down. 4.You’ve changed lanes over five times in the last minute. 5.You can see the hairs on the back of the neck of the driver ahead. 6.Your heart’s racing, your palms are sweating and you’re punching the dashboard screaming,“Move it! Move it!” 7.You’re passengers are on their cell phones with their next of kin saying goodbye. 8. There are four cop cars behind you with their sirens on. 9. Everyone in front of you is pulling over so you can pass. 10. Lastly, your passengers are ripping the airbags out of the dashboard. Q — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally. info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com Tell Trinity, P.O. Box 23861 . Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33307 Sponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild 800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org Q - L I V I N G Out in the Stars by Charlene Lichtenstein June 13-26 Jupiter, the planet of luck and expansion retrogrades.Anything that is over the top will spill over in a flood. When does too much become too, too much? Just wait and see. GEMINI (05.22-06.21) Hold off on any travel plans if you can, pink Twin. Not only will you find yourself embroiled in some international incident, you can also find yourself in situations that require a herculean effort to undo. Kick up your feet closer to home and revel in the simple pleasures of take-out and foreign movie rentals to quell your exotic tastes.Anyone we know? CANCER (06.22-07.23) A simple flirtation can turn into much, much more, so be careful where you point your gaydar. Queer Crabs are apt to go head over claws for the wrong type. (Do you actually have a “wrong type?”) Before your heart is used as a welcome mat, take note of what you are really looking for in a love match.When in doubt, check their pay stub. LEO (07.24-08.23) Partnerships may have their amazingly great times and their very stressful times over the next few weeks. Try to maneuver through these high highs and low lows with a practical perspective. Proud Lions can often be too dramatic for their own good. This is the time to tamp down on excessive displays and maintain a cool and calm mien. Too late! VIRGO (08.24-09.23) A little job that, at first blush, seems easy enough will wind up not being easy at all. So avoid volunteering for any task at work. In fact, if you can avoid work altogether it might be worth the vacation days.But,if you are tied to your desk, try to be inconspicuous, stay in the background and appear to be busy as a bee.Let others have the buzz. LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Proud Libras may find that a little fun suddenly turns into way too much fun. You can be sucked into the vortex of the party-hearty life. While there are worse pitfalls in life, how high do you have to fly before your wings get clipped? Moderation is key but it may be difficult to tell when you have crossed the line. You test the outer limits of your consumption. Burp. SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) What seems easy is not. Home-based chores become out-of-control giant projects before you realize it. So, avoid starting anything on the domestic. Queer Scorps might also avoid any important family discussions now. Nothing you say can be contained and emotions can run high. Why not escape while the escaping is good? Air fares are low. SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Watch what you JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction say, how you say it and who you say it . Contributing Writer to. Gay Archers have ho of in mouth. Snide comments and raw opinions find their way to the front page. Anything you say can and will be held against you. So, instead of fanning the air, let your actions speak louder and prouder than your words. That is until you knock something over. CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Budgets are made to be broken.At least, that is what you think. Pink Caps are not usually spendthrifts, but now you splurge on anything and anyone. While this has some immediate positive impact on your popularity, it is a bad long-term strategy for personal success. Too, too soon the bills will come due and then who will be there to feed you peeled grapes and man the fans? AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) Aqueerians make a huge splash on the social scene. So much so that they displace water in the pool. Is this the best first impression that you can make on the high and mighty? Rather than boss the course, try to blend into the background and make your mark in soft shades of gray. There is plenty of time to move into the forefront and wow the masses. Just not now. PISCES (02.20-03.20) Guppies with a need to keep quiet will be unable to do so. There are no secrets around you as you inadvertently spill the beans. But, maybe this is a good thing. There shouldn’t be too many deep and abiding secrets to suppress. Intuitively you know that unloading your baggage is good for your long-term peace of mind. Pull off the bandaid and let the healing begin. ARIES (03.21-04.20) If rambunctious friends begin to get under your skin, expect to have to scratch the itch. Proud Rams fall in with a loud, proud crowd and allow themselves to be carried off on a wave of mischief and pure recklessness. Will you ride this massive flowe like an expert or eventually wash off on the shore like so much wreckage? I suppose it could be worse. TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Tread carefully in your career lest you take a small step off the ladder. Queer Bulls don’t realize the power of their actions and the implications of their decisions at this time. But, there is a lot you can accomplish behind the scenes where your ambition can be controlled. Simply plan your course of action and let the scheme simmer for a while before you implement it. Q © 2008 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites. JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 29 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Q - L I V I N G Out and About . compiled by Q-Notes staff Events and happenings across the Carolinas Community Centers Charlotte Lesbian & Gay Community Center annual spring concert. UNC School of the Arts, Watson Chamber Music Hall, 1533 Main St. 8 p.m. $12 advance/$15 at the door. 336-589-6267. www.triadpridemenschorus.org. 704-333-0144 www.gaycharlotte.com June 21 • Durham Harriet Hancock Center See June 20 for details. First Presbyterian Church, 305 E. Main St. 3 p.m. $15. www.tgmchorus.org. 803-771-7713 www.scpride.org BraveSouls & Dreamers. June 21 • Folly Beach OutWilmington GLCC Big Gay Beach Day 910-762-4717 www.outwilmington.com Organizers guarantee it’ll be the biggest beach party in South Carolina. Presented by Charleston Area Mpowerment Project (CHAMP), festivities include dancing, DJ, prizes, volleyball and the group’s annual “tug ‘o’ war” pitting the lesbians against gay men. Donations acccepted. No pets allowed on beach. Alcohol is permitted. 1600 E. Ashley Ave. Free. For more information call Stoo at 843-744-4062. The Center Project 843-626-4953 www.thecenterproject.com Upcoming Events: June 13 • Greensboro Our Favorites and Yours June 27 • Charlotte The Triad Pride Men’s Chorus celebrates its 10th annual spring concert. Greensboro Day School Sloan Theater, 5401 Lawndale Dr. 8 p.m. $12 advance/$15 at the door. 336-589-6267. www.triadpridemenschorus.org. Join RuPaul and other live acts for great drinks, fabulous food and wonderful fun, celebrating Pride on the day of Stonewall’s 40th anniversary. NoDa neighborhood, N. Davidson St. and 36th. 4 p.m. Q June 13 • Winston-Salem ‘Pedro’ Winston-Salem’s OUT at the Movies will screen Academy Award winner Dustin Lance Black’s “Pedro,” a film depicting the life of openly gay, HIV-positive MTV “Real World” star Pedro Zamora. Proceeds benefit UNCSA School of Filmmaking and the Adam Foundation.ACE Theatre Complex, UNCSA, 1533 S. Main St. 8 p.m. $5. June 18 • Columbia ‘Rocky Horror’ Trustus Theatre presents a special SC Pride stage performance of “Rocky Horror Picture Show.” Proceeds benefit the Harriet Hancock Community Center. Trustus Theatre, 520 Lady St. 7:30 p.m. $40 in advance. shop.scpride.org. June 19 • Charlotte Rainbow Fest info: Announce your community event in Out & About. email: outandabout@q-notes.com. Upcoming Pride Festivals June 18-21 • Columbia SC Black Pride Featuring Mr. and Miss Pride pageants, welcome reception, Black LGBT film fest and town hall, HIV/AIDS awareness events and community expo. www.southcarolinablackpride.com. June 20 • Spartanburg Upstate Pride Featuring a parade and community festival. upstatepride.homestead.com. July 3-5 • Myrtle Beach Grab the Mic! Myrtle Beach Pride Sing Out! Youth Chorus, the Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte, Time Out Youth and Charlotte Coalition for Social Justice present “Grab the Mic!,” a LGBT-friendly talent competition for youth ages 15-21. Unitarian Universalist Church of Charlotte, 234 N. Sharon Amity Rd. www.gmccharlotte.org. July 16-19 • Charlotte June 20 • Charlotte Invincible Summer One Voice Chorus presents their concert,“Invincible Summer,” celebrating heroes of all types and featuring a welcome reception and silent auction. Booth Playhouse, 130 N. Tryon St. 7 p.m. www.onevoicechorus.com. June 20 • Raleigh ‘BraveSouls & Dreamers’ Triangle Gay Men’s Chorus presents the North Carolina premiere of “BraveSouls & Dreamers,” a dramatic cantata about the physical and spiritual consequences of war and the need for peace. Pullen Memorial Baptist Church, 1801 Hillsborough St. 8 p.m. $15. www.tgmchorus.org. June 20 • Winston-Salem Our Favorites and Yours The Triad Pride Men’s Chorus celebrates its 10th Featuring a pageant and happy hour, day festival and nighttime activities. myrtlebeachpride.com. Charlotte Black Gay Pride Featuring a town hall meeting in conjunction with Time Out Youth, diva party, Pride parties and community expo. www.charlotteblackgaypride.com. July 25 • Charlotte Pride Charlotte Featuring a day-long festival with local and regional entertainment, several pre-Pride events including Miss Pride Charlotte pageants, mass choral concert and more. Festival entertainment includes musician and poet Amy Steinberg, singers Brendan Velasquez, Chrys Matthes, Joshua Klipp and Rodie Ray, dancers Daniel Gray and the Beledi Beat Dancers, and more. www.pridecharlotte.com. Visit Q-Notes’ Pride 2009 website at www.q-notes.com/pride/ for more on upcoming Prides and the Pride Charlotte Pageantry System. Don’t Miss This Charlotte • Live at the Caribou Join your friends at one of Charlotte’s favorite LGBT-friendly coffee houses, Caribou Coffee on East, for live entertainment every Saturday night starting at 8:30 p.m. The fun kicked off on June 6 and continues through the summer. Caribou Coffee, 1531 East Blvd. 30 JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction 31 Not for Reproduction 32 Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction Not for Reproduction JUNE 13 . 2009 • QNotes Not for Reproduction