the image above as a full

Transcription

the image above as a full
YOUR MATCH-DAY PROGRAMME
EURO 2012
quarter-final
ENGLAND
Versus
Italy
Sunday June 24
Olympic Stadium, Kiev
kick-off 7.45 pm
ROY HODGSON’S PROGRAMME NOTES*
*according to Giles Smith
Hello again!
What a moment for us all to savour. If you had told me, at the beginning of this tournament, that I would be setting down my thoughts ahead
of the wonderful prospect of a European Championship quarter-final against Italy, I would have cancelled the walking holiday I booked for
myself and my wife in Las Alpujarras, commencing Friday 22 June, and would therefore have avoided losing the deposit.
Still, this is the remarkable position we find ourselves in, and a berth in the knock-out stages is a due reward for all the work the team and
backroom staff have put in and the low expectations that we have carefully maintained.
I’ve said all along that managing our hopes was crucial, and we continue to do that. I like to pin up a motivational phrase or saying in the
dressing room before a game, and throughout the group stage the phrase I chose to use was: ‘England Doesn’t Expect.’ It seems to have
inspired us.
I must say I was delighted with the performance against Ukraine of the National Anthem. True, one or two of the players are still singing ‘our
Queen’ at the end of the third line, when it’s ‘the Queen’. But Ray Lewington has been over the videos with them in no uncertain terms and
we’ve had a couple of good sessions using the karaoke machine in the rec room, so hopefully that’s now tightened up. There are always
things to work on, but it wouldn’t be football if there weren’t.
Enjoy the game! Without expecting too much, obviously.
Roy Hodgson
THE TEAMS
The boss
By Rory Smith
Best nickname
The Ox
(Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain)
—v —
The Atomic Ant
(Sebastian Giovinco)
Best tattoos
Glen Johnson
—v —
Daniele De Rossi
The Frank
Lampard award
for fattest player
Most cultivated hair
Bad boys
Top WAG
Wayne Rooney
—v —
Antonio Cassano
Ashley Cole
—v —
Mario Balotelli
Scott Parker
—v —
Claudio Marchisio
Kimberly Crew
(Joe Hart)
—v —
Eleonora Abbagnato
Roy Hodgson
Caught the FA’s eye after his glorious
1976 season in Sweden, the 64-yearold landed the top job thanks to his
reputation as a coach and his clean
driving licence.
Il mister
Cesare Prandelli
Though the 54-year-old looks a little like
a regular guest at bunga-bunga parties,
he is actually one of the world’s most
respected coaches.
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21 22 10
The bench
1
Joe Hart
2
23
Glen Johnson
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4 11
4
3 62 215
3
9 21
9
24 917
311
11 16
The marauding Liverpool
full back has spent the
past three years learning
Spanish, after deciding
the menu in La Tasca was
misleading.
James Milner
There are many interesting
facts about the Manchester
City winger, but the most
interesting is that he is
from Horsforth, Britain’s
largest village.
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10
21
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21
25
15
4
The Manchester City
goalkeeper is the only
squad member to have been
head boy at school, though
Andy Carroll did run the
tuck shop.
Martin Kelly
In the squad after a raft of injuries, the Liverpool youngster
ticked all the boxes: enthusiastic, versatile, not Rio.
5 6 5 15 18 25 3 6
6 2 18
36 15
15 3 18
Ashley Cole
4 John6Terry15 19 Joleon
1 Lescott
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174 14
7 16 87 17 19
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8 19
11 16
19 47 20 11
8 1420
1711 14
6
3 19 18
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518
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109 10
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21 22
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15
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So devoted to their captain
are Chelsea’s fans that
they continue to display the
“Captain, Leader, Legend”
banner Terry himself had
commissioned in 2006.
Scott Parker
After seeing his own
tresses singed off in a
factory blaze, Parker
became the first Briton to
receive a hair transplant.
The donor had died in 1955.
Now with Manchester
City and a star of the
tournament, Lescott once
burnt £1 million while
part of left-leaning 1990s
electronica combo the KLF.
Steven Gerrard (c)
A medical marvel – the
32-year-old was born
without a forehead –
Gerrard’s rise to Liverpool’s
heartbeat and England
captain is an inspiration.
Philosopher, feminist and
role model. Left Arsenal to
join Chelsea for a pay rise
and the promise of all the
teenagers he can shoot.
Ashley Young
Plagued by a chronic
foot complaint, the
gravitationally challenged
Manchester United winger
is forced to play in a pair of
M&S lounge slippers.
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22 10 1 9 21 22 10 1
20Welbeck
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England’s star striker
“visualises” every game the
night before he plays, imagining
every shot, every pass, every
swiftly aimed kick to his
opponent’s crotch.
The young striker scored
a sublime goal against
Sweden, and several musical
hits as part of the comedyrap duo Kid ’N Play.
15 18
Theo Walcott
5
Came to football late, only beginning his career after
he was selected for the 2006 World Cup by Sven-Göran
Eriksson.
Jordan Henderson
The Liverpool midfield player was handed Frank Lampard’s
shirt upon the Chelsea man’s injury. He’s had it taken in.
17 14 Andy7Carroll 8
20
15
5 18 Leighton5Baines
19
Throwback to days when men were men, Greece’s
economy was booming and big strikers could drink all they
wanted.
Named after where he was conceived: near Jim Leighton,
the former Scotland goalkeeper.
10 1 Robert Green
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7 20
8 Phil19
7 14
Jones
Hart’s understudy, a huge cricket fan, admits he does not
like watching football. Observers suggest this explains a
lot.
Excels in a number of positions. Despite having the longest
arms in the squad, has never tried his hand in goal.
Phil Jagielka
1910 201
Stewart Downing
15 19
1
Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain
A reliable defender for Everton and the scriptwriter
credited with revitalising the ailing teen favourite
Hollyoaks.
The Liverpool winger scored and made no Premier League
goals last season. Surprisingly, not England’s first choice.
Arsenal’s young tyro and, to many, the future of England.
He may suffer, as Aled Jones did, once puberty hits.
Jermain Defoe
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Condemned to a role as England’s “super-sub”. He last
scored for his country in September 2010.
Jack Butland
The teenager won a competition run by England’s
corporate sponsors to fill the 23rd place in Hodgson’s
squad after it was noted the country only had 22
footballers.
La panchina
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Antonio Cassano
Mario Balotelli
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8
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1819
11Motta
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748 4Thiago
9 21 22 10 1
The unpredictable Milan
striker explained his
struggle to control his
weight by claiming he had
slept with 700 women and
always gorged on three
post-coital pastries.
Quiet and unassuming, the
Manchester City striker
likes darts, fires, starting
fires, arguing and prisons,
but, sadly, not dressing up
as Santa.
Born in Brazil, trained in
Spain and employed in
France, the 29-year-old
decided to play for Italy
after hearing the songs of
Joe Dolce.
Christian Maggio
Napoli full back. A late bloomer, the 30-year-old formed
part of Michael Flatley’s Riverdance troupe as a teenager.
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Daniele De Rossi
Claudio Marchisio
Owner of possibly the
finest, most lustrous beard
in Europe, De Rossi wears
shirts with one long sleeve
and one short one. Nobody
knows why.
Bearded Juventus schemer
and Pirlo’s bodyguard, both
on and off the pitch, where
he carries a samurai sword
to protect the playmaker.
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Andrea Pirlo
4
Antonio Di Natale
The ageing poacher is known among the squad by the
English translation of his name: Tony Christmassy.
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Federico Balzaretti
Leonardo Bonucci
Andrea Barzagli
Inter Milan once priced
the central defender at
just €500, ironically the
same price as his prized
possession: a de luxe
Nespresso machine.
Restored to the national
team just last year after
taking three seasons out to
complete his thesis on the
works of Vladimir Nabokov.
Angelo Ogbonna
Survived driving his Smart Car off a bridge into a river in
2008. Has since given up his other career as a stuntman.
Majestic playmaker who
has lost none of his
touch on the pitch, but
appears to be ageing at an
alarming rate off it.
Despite looking not unlike
a vagrant who has been
dragged backwards through
a hedge, the left back is
married to the
renowned ballerina Eleonora
Abbagnato.
Giorgio Chiellini
The Juventus central defender is suspended and has
exactly the same face as one-time Roman despot Julius
Caesar.
Ignazio Abate
1
Salvatore Sirigu
Spent five years in Sicily, but the reserve goalkeeper has
not adopted the island’s traditional omertà, and is quite
chatty.
8
Taken to the tournament
as reserve right back, the
Milan player has emerged
as the most Aryan player at
Cesare Prandelli’s disposal.
Emanuele Giaccherini
16 18 20 21 22
The 27-year-old won his first cap in the tournament,
despite his hobbit ancestry jeopardising his aerial ability.
Morgan De Sanctis
Named after Morgan Freeman, the goalkeeper has seen
The Shawshank Redemption more than four times.
Fabio Borini
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Gianluigi Buffon
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3
4
Veteran goalkeeper and
captain. Voted Juventus’s
second-most handsome
player for eight years
running, he named his
second son after Van
Halen vocalist David Lee
Roth.
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An ex-Chelsea youth star, it is likely that the striker’s legs
have shrapnel wounds from encounters with Ashley Cole.
Riccardo Montolivo
Born in Caravaggio, resident in Florence, the midfield player
hates art. He is, though, a huge fan of interpretive dance.
Sebastian Giovinco
Nicknamed “The Atomic Ant” after the cartoon character,
Giovinco played football in a helmet until the age of 18.
Alessandro Diamanti
The forward is the only former West Ham player Italy
have brought to a leading championship. A remarkable
oversight.
Antonio Nocerino
Midfield player brought into the squad to make sure De
Rossi has someone to discuss beard maintenance with.