here! - We are Dancers NYC

W E A RE
D ANCERS
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http://wearedancersnyc.com/
We are a group of current and former dancers
in New York City. We created this booklet to
empower dancers by providing information,
support, and resources.
We meet regularly in New York City to
support each other and build community
among dancers. If you are a current or
former dancer and would like to join us,
email us at wearedancersnyc@gmail.com,
or find us on Facebook at facebook.com/
wearedancersnyc.
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“I love dancing because
I’m free to make my
own schedule and take
time off when I need it.
If I get bored at one
club, there are always
other clubs that will
hire me.” – Ramona
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
TABLE OF CONTENTS
6 Safety
11 health
16 beauty
22 know your rights
24 family and relationships
34 filing taxes
35 saving money
37 choosing a club
38 remember...
40 Resources
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SAFETY
We’re all concerned with safety at work. Clubs might
have poor security, guys can try to follow us home,
and we’ve all heard about girls being robbed or
assaulted. Sure, it’s true that the money can pit us
against one another since we all have bills to pay, but
when the situation requires it, dancers will take care
of each other. If you do have a negative experience,
don’t be afraid to reach out to others for help and
to warn them of the problem. Being aware of safety
concerns is the first step in addressing them.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
In the club
Many of us feel unsafe at work when rowdy
customers try to violate our physical boundaries. If
you feel unsafe, trust your gut and call security. If
you’re comfortable talking to management at your
club, let them know if a certain customer causes you
trouble.
Leaving the Club
When you leave the club, be aware of your
surroundings or walk with other dancers or staff
for added security. Make sure you have car service
phone numbers in case you decide to use them. This
is important if you find yourself in a situation where
you have been drinking or are not sure if you can get
home safely. If you are waiting for a car service or a
ride, wait inside until the car comes.
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“When it’s late or super-quiet
outside, sometimes I’ll walk
in the middle of the street
rather than the sidewalk.”
– Donna
“Before a shift, I always
make sure a friend knows
my schedule for the day. As
soon as I get home, I send
her a text that I made it back
all right.” – Stacey
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
“I took a self-defense
class called Female SelfAwareness. It was super
empowering and made
me more aware of my
surroundings and
how to behave in
different situations.”
– Vera
“I keep my phone in my
hand, ready to dial
my emergency contact
person if I need to.”
– Monique
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Domestic Violence
We know that violence doesn’t just happen in the
clubs. We all know dancers who have had abusive
partners or who have had trouble with boyfriends and
other members of the family. Remember, no one has
the right to beat or abuse you anywhere, anytime. If
you find yourself in such a situation, check out the
Resources section in the back of
this booklet or look at our website for where
to get support.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
HEALTH
Staying healthy is important for anyone, but dancing
can be especially hard on the body. If we’re not
healthy, we can’t keep working. Dancers may be
good at taking care of others, but we also have to
take care of ourselves.
Our website has information for dancers about
breast care, safer sex and STI testing, nutrition,
hygiene, and drugs and alcohol. Sometimes people
delay taking care of their health because they worry
about the expense, but there are free and affordable
options
in New York City. Check out the resource section in
the back of this booklet or look at our website.
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Think of yourself as an athlete – your job is not just
dancing, but pulling long hours on your feet, keeping
a positive attitude, radiating great skin and hair. It’s
impossible to do these things without maintaining
your personal wellbeing. Your body is one of your
most important investments – treat it well!
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
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“I never drink at work. The
bartender knows that “vodka
soda” is just soda. It’s
nice because I get a drink
commission without having
to get drunk—and the bar
makes money off me too.
Also, it’s a zero calorie drink!”
– Honey
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
“I always keep healthy snacks
in my locker and drink lots
of water. It keeps my skin
clear, and when I’m drinking
it helps prevent a hangover.”
– Chanel
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BEAUTY
While looks certainly aren’t everything when it
comes to being a successful dancer, they sure are
an important factor. One thing to remember is that
strippers come in all shapes, ages, sizes, and colors,
and there’s a customer for everyone.
At the same time, there are some “types” of girls
who get hired more easily in certain clubs. Especially
in Manhattan, it’s often easier to get hired if you’re
young, thin, and white or a light-skinned woman of
color. If you don’t fit that type, you may have fewer
options for where to work, and you may have to work
harder to make your money.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
This can be a tough industry to work in and it’s
easy to start to feel bad about ourselves — or our
coworkers — when we face this daily pressure to
look a certain way. Of course, we all know that the
days when we feel hot are often our best days on
the job, and New York City is a great place to snag
spa deals, great haircuts and blowouts, discount
waxing and hair removal, and even explore surgical
treatment if you choose that route. (Check out our
Resource section for some stores and salons we like!)
But if you find yourself spending a lot of money just
to fit in at work, make sure it’s worth it to you — that
you are making that money back and then some.
You may be able to spend less, make more, and feel
better about yourself at a club that’s more relaxed.
(See our Choosing a Club section.)
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“As a dark-skinned black
woman, the number of clubs
I can work at are limited.
Even though I walk in looking
fine, management just sees
my race and automatically
tells me they aren’t hiring. I
know that’s not true, because
my white friend may have
just been hired at that same
club!” - Stacey
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
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“Because I’m a thicker girl,
I’ve had trouble getting
hired at some of the higherend clubs. Actually, when I
was working in Manhattan,
the manager would stand
and stare at me while I ate
lunch and would sometimes
criticize me and my size
when he saw me eating. It
felt pretty awful.” - Jennifer
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
“Once I had a customer
who told me he liked older
dancers like me, but that
they were hard to find – too
many of the girls were young
and he thought they were
immature.” – Isabel
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KNOW YOUR RIGHTS
As dancers, many of us think we have no legal rights,
whether because we work off the books or because
we are afraid that people won’t take us seriously.
But dancers have legal rights like other workers. If
you are having a problem at your club, or you have
questions about a legal issue, you can get free and
confidential legal assistance from attorneys at the
Urban Justice Center by calling 646-602-5617.
Or check out the Know Your Rights section of our
website for more information about your rights as a
dancer.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
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FAMILY
AND RELATIONSHIPS
Dancers are not just dancers – we are daughters,
sisters, mothers, girlfriends, and wives. But
sometimes our work gets in the way of our personal
relationships. And our personal relationships can
get in the way of feeling positive about our income
and work. Dancing can be hard to explain to those
we love. Maybe your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t
respect and appreciate what you do. Maybe you feel
guilty about lying to your parents or kids about what
you do. You are not alone—all dancers deal with
these issues at some point.
If you’re looking for community or support, join our
email list or find us on Facebook and come to a
meeting.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
PARENTS
Many parents have a specific idea of what they want
their daughters to do with their lives—whether it’s
going to college, getting married, having kids, or
getting a specific kind of job. Working as a dancer
may not fit into your parents’ idea of what’s “normal”
or “respectable.” Even if your parents don’t judge
you for being a dancer, they may be concerned
for your safety if you are working late at night in an
unsafe environment. For these reasons, many of
us struggle with whether to tell our parents about
our jobs. In the end, you know what’s best for your
personal situation.
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“At first my mom said she
was cool with it, then she
started to be funny about
it. She would bring it up in
conversations whenever we
had a fight, like it was a way
to bring me down. Then she
ended up telling my dad,
which I was really unhappy
about. He didn’t need to
know.” - Sindy
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
Kids
Dancing can be a great job for moms, especially
single parents with busy lives. Dancers have flexible
schedules and we work fewer hours, so we have
more time to spend with our kids. Also, dancing pays
better than a lot of jobs, so we can provide a better
standard of living for our kids, and might make it
possible to be a better mom. But society tells our
kids that it’s bad to have a mom who’s a stripper.
This can be hurtful and hard for us to deal with.
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Kids
It’s hard enough to talk to kids about sexuality—
talking about what we do for money just makes it
harder. Some of us choose not to tell our kids about
our jobs. Maybe we don’t want them to be confused
or hurt by what we do. Maybe we don’t want them
to get teased at school because other kids found
out their mom is a stripper. Others may decide to
be totally honest and tell our kids everything. Others
may choose a midway point.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
“My son is 8, and this is the
one job that gives me the
flexibility to take time off if
he needs me, or be there
when he leaves for school
in the morning. I tried office
jobs before but I can’t really
handle the bullshit as a single
mom.” – Jennifer
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PARTNERS
Does your girlfriend make you feel guilty about your
job? Does your boyfriend think dancing is easy
money? Does your husband stay home playing
computer games while you hustle to pay the bills?
Lots of people are OK with dating a stripper to
begin with. Maybe they think it’s hot. Maybe they
even come to the club and tip you. But once the
relationship gets serious, that’s when a lot of partners
start to get jealous. They may start to say that working
as a dancer is like cheating. At the same time, they
are probably still happy to spend your money.
Dancing is hard work and we deserve respect. If our
partners had to do what we have to do to pay the
bills, they would stop trying to tell us it’s easy money.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
“My boyfriend knows where I
work and respects it. When
we met, I was stripping, and
he wouldn’t try to change
who I am just because I’m
with him now. He knows we
all gotta do what we gotta
do.” – Honey
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FILING TAXES
You may be wondering whether you need to pay
taxes at all, or about your likelihood of ‘getting
caught’ if you choose not to file.
Check out the Filing Taxes section on our website
to help you figure out what you need to do to avoid
being audited by the IRS or facing prosecution for tax
evasion. Our Financial Resources section also has
a list of dancer-friendly accountants and financial
advisers, including low-cost options.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
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SAVING MONEY
It’s hard to save money as a dancer because you
never know how much money you’re going to make
in a night, never mind in a month. You might make
$300 one night and only $30 the next night. You
might even lose money to the club some nights.
When you have a great night, it can be tempting to
splurge and spend it on stuff you don’t really need.
But if the club is dead next week, you might find
yourself struggling to buy groceries. And what if
you injure yourself, or have a baby, or you just get
burned out and have to take a break from dancing
for a while?
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
Saving money can help you avoid that end-of-themonth scramble to pay rent. It may even help you
save money for long-term goals like vacations or a
college fund for your kids.
Check out our website for information on:
How to spend less and save more
Where to keep your money
The rich stripper stereotype
Accessing public benefits
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http://wearedancersnyc.com/
CHOOSING A CLUB
New York City has no shortage of clubs to work at.
While many clubs in Manhattan have higher house
fees and tip-outs and only hire certain “types” of
women, there are several clubs in the outer boroughs
that hire women of a range of colors, ages, and
body types. Clubs also vary on their requirements
regarding shifts and champagne rooms, as well as
on the level of physical contact with customers.
Websites like stripperweb.com are great resources,
but sometimes visiting a club to talk to (or simply to
observe) the women who work there is the best way
to find a club that’s a good fit for you.
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REMEMBER…
Dancing is a real form of labor! People may think of it
as ‘unskilled’ work, but as dancers, we know the level
of skill, stamina, endurance, and courage it takes to
do the work we do. As dancers, we are proud of the
strengths we’ve developed working in NYC’s strip
clubs. That’s why we’re working together to help
create a world where all kinds of workers are treated
with respect.
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
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RESOURCES
For a complete list of resources, visit our website,
wearedancersnyc.com. A few useful resources are
listed below.
Safe Horizon (NYC) –
Domestic Violence Project
Free immigration and family legal matters assistance
to survivors of domestic violence and crime victims.
800-621-HOPE (4673)
Callen-Lorde Community Health Center
Health clinic providing non-judgmental, free/low cost
medical and mental health services.
356 W. 18th St., New York, NY 10011,
212-271-7200
http://wearedancersnyc.com/
Lifebooker.com
A listserv that sends out amazing daily deals at
salons and spas. Up to 70 percent off massages,
facials, manicures, pedicures, and haircuts
Marlena Sonn, CFP(r),
Christopher Street Financial.
Dancer-friendly financial
and investment adviser.
212.405.1619,
800.262.6644, ext. 1619
Urban Justice Center
646-602-5617
Free legal assistance for dancers
Stripperweb.com
Online community forum for dancers
all over the world.
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Check out wearedancersnyc.com for lots more
information and resources for dancers in English,
Spanish, Russian, and Portuguese.
Visita wearedancernyc.com para más información y
recursos para bailarinas en Ingles, Español,
Ruso, y Portugués.
Confira wearedancersnyc.com para muito mais
informações e recursos para os dançarinos em
Inglês, Espanhol, Russo e Português.
Загляните на нашу страничку
wearedancersnyc.com для более полной
информации.
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