screbusiness services: another

SCENE
SCENE
WESSEX
WESSEX
SCRE
wessexscene.co.uk 31st October 2001 - ISSUE 749 - PRICELESS
W A R O N FAT C AT S - W A R O N FAT C AT S - W A R O N FAT C AT S
BUSINESS SERVICES: ANOTHER
THE Wessex Scene can
EXCLUSIVELY reveal that
penny
pinching
ROGER
MALLETT (Business Services’
fat cat) seized over £1.5million out
of YOUR pockets!
CASE STUDY
The devious ways in which this
scandal has been orchestrated have
only just been uncovered by our
intrepid reporters.
He, and his cronies at Business
Services have stealthily been
increasing the prices in the Garden
Court and Piazza restaurants.
Excuses were made and crisis’ were
discovered. The “Foot and Mouth”
epidemic saw, understandably,
prices of meat rise. And yet, FIVE
MONTHS after the decline of the
disease, prices have hardly
decreased at all.
Sadly, Bob has a clinical condition
which means his immune system
can only tolerate Chicken.
THIS IS ONLY THE START!
Bob (who refused to made named in
case there were to be repercussions)
is a 3rd year student whose budget
has been totally ruined by this act of
administrational apathy.
“I was gutted when I found out the
price of my favourite meal, “Spit
Roast Chicken”, had gone up by the
extortionate 61p”
“This is a substantial increase above
the rate of inflation and cannot be
tolerated. My health is at risk here.”
Don’t worry BOB! Student health is
of paramount importance to the
Wessex Scene team. We will
campaign for you!!
TREEDOM
E
V
I
S
U
L
OLD
EXC
VICE-CHANCELLOR
in EMINEM
OUTRAGE!
Our daring reporters
bring YOU the TRUTH
... on page 5
It’s all getting a bit
EDGE-y
Miss Tree defends
her right to life.
... on page 3
PAGE 2
Wessexscene.co.uk
INSIDE YOUR
SCENE
WESSEX
THIS
ISSUE
TIGER TALKS
BACK...
FRESHER
FROLICS
Exclusive
photos
UNION NEWS pg 10
M ESSER
‘One small step’
SEE PAGE 11
SCENE
WESSEX
TSUNAMI
WAR on NATURAL TERRORISM
PANIC REIGNS AS
TERROR
HITS THE UNION
Imogen Hitchcock
WIN!
In Competitions
BEER WATCH
WITH JOEL STOBART
Durham
Wales
London
Soton
AROUND THE WORLD
Amsterdam£1.00
Athens
£1.20
Barbados £1.10
Barcelona £1.30
Budapest £0.80
Calcutta £0.80
Dhaka
£0.90
Frisco
£2.50
Geneva
£2.70
Hong Kong £4.00
Jo’berg
£1.45
Kabul
£2.00*
Lagos
£0.55
Lisbon
£1.50
London
£1.95
Los Angeles £1.70
Madrtid
£1.50
Majorca
£1.60
Manus
£1.00
Miami
£1.40
Moscow
£0.90
New York £2.00
Oslo
£4.00
Paris
£2.00
Prague
£0.60
Rio
£1.45
Sarajevo
£1.00
Sydney
£1.40
Tenerife
£1.10
*Where available
GOT A STORY: CALLSCENENEWSDESK
WESSEX
023 80 595230
editor@wessexscene.co.uk
The Wessex Scene Online:
http://wessexscene.co.uk
IN a great piece of investigative
journalism, the WESSEX SCENE
can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that
the Student’s Union is set for
certain destruction, and we’re not
talking about Stephen Edwards’
renovation plans.
Boffins at the University College
of London have published a
blinding report warning of
impending doom when a 70 metre
wave swamps the south coast of
Britain.
The main culprit for this potential
tragedy is a highly active volcano
on the Canary Island of La Palma.
A huge chunk of the island
could fall off into the sea. Dr Simon
Day warns “the mass of moving
rock will push the water in front of
it, creating a tsunami wave far
larger than any seen in history!”
As it moves it would grow larger
and larger and the result would be a
wave 65metres higher than enjoyed
by English surfers.
Unfortunately for the Student’s
Union, it is very difficult to predict
when disaster will strike. It may
take more than one eruption to set
the devastating sequence off.
As a show of dedication to it’s
readers, the Wessex Scene has
compiled a list of other “natural
terrorists” that could target our
University.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Natural Terrorists
the 5 MOST Wanted
VOLCANOS:Even though the
nearest known group is over 900
miles away, you never know
EARTHQUAKES: Wales is the
nearest headquarters for these
earth moving terrors
SNOWSTORMS: These cool
customers are our biggest threat
being so close in Scotland.
HEATWAVES: Not a real threat
(can you remember the last time
we had hot weather in
Southampton?)
TORNADOS:Constantly winging
their way over to the UK from the
Pacific Ocean, this gang are
constantly targeting the South
Coast of England.
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 3
Wessexscene.co.uk
Drinking Game of the Week
WHIZZ BANG BOUNCE
ONE person starts the game by
saying "The name of the game is
Whizz" giving the direction they
toss an imaginary ball in the air
and use either wizz or bang to
start the game. NOTE:You must
say the term and perform the
action.
Bang
You take the elbow of your arm
opposite of the ball direction and
bounce it on the table. Ex. if ball is
coming from your left you bounce
with your right.
* This reverses the direction of the
ball.
Bounce
Both elbows are bounced off table.
* This skips the person next in
order.
WHIZZ
Whizz
A sweeping motion made with the
hand of the ball direction. Ex. if the
ball comes from your right going to
your left you must wizz it with your
right hand.
* This passes the ball in the same
direction around the table.
Emma Rose
ENIMEN VS. BOZ SCAGGS
SHOCK HORROR! Our very
own ex-VC, Sir Howard Newby
has been labelled none other
than, an ENIMEM FAN!!!
Having been wrongly accused of
such a heinous appreciation by
the Guardian, they have since
humbly retracted their suggestion
upon discovery that their “even
better authority” of information
on this unlikely fan was
unsurprisingly completely wrong.
It appears however that Sir Newby
has admitted to having a somewhat
unique interest; being, and I quote,
“the only known vicechancellorial
fan” of the one and only legendary
musician, Boz Scaggs. Who? I hear
you say - well let us update you
cause it seems we have been
missing out.
This game sounds very complicated
but once learned is very easy, if
you're sober. Once you start to feel
it you're for it.
BANG BOUNCE
A CUT-OUT-AND-KEEP BOZ SCAGGS FACTFILE:
He was born William Royce
Scaggs, on the 8th June 1944,
Ohio, USA.
He first found “fame” in his school
and uni bands with Steve Miller.
Later he grouped with the Wigs, an
R & B unit who even graced
London looking for a more
receptive audience - they
obviously found good ‘ole Sir
Newby and that was about it
‘cause they then broke up and Boz
had dubious fame in Scandinavia as
a travelling folksinger.
He also reunited with buddy Steve
Miller, recording two albums with
the Steve Miller Band (original
name huh?)
He then went on in ‘68 to become a
successful soul/rock soloist having
now released a total of 14 albums and we bet Sir Newby has every one
of them.
But somehow I think the Edge will
be more likely to keep its eye
on Enimem’s career and I don’t
think that Ents will be asking
Boz to perform in any
forthcoming SUSU events.
TREEDOM
A Tree’s Miraculous Fight for Survival
Emma Rose
FUN-LOVING, single lime with
g.s.o.h. Looking for a loving,
caring environment to spread her
roots.
Good-looking, tall, bushy, and
still young at sixty, ready to
flower in July...
pinned to her smooth, grey bark.
Obviously personal health and
sightseeing in the area had been
thoughtfully organised for her and
her friends by the council. How
welcome she felt.
...and it seems the council heard her
plea, for all of a sudden a letter
arrived for her, addressed, ‘Dear
The Tree’. (Apparently this is a
‘standard legalistic device.’)
But it seems her lifespan has been
overlooked; will a temporary order
be sufficient? The Common Lime
can live to the incredible age of 500
years; she fears the council will not
be there to support them by that
time.
It revealed that she would not have
to move to the ‘Old Logging
Home’, rest-assured she and her
three friends had been granted their
temporary preservation order.
In addition, a leaflet about caring
for trees and a map of the area was
Wessex Scene will keep you posted
with EXCLUSIVE interviews
with Miss Lime.
PAGE 4
Wessexscene.co.uk
Afghan Attack:
“CATASTROPHE”
SCENE
WESSEX
WESSEX SCENE:
TEAMWORK
A RIGHT TO REPLY...
IN the previous issue of Wessex
Scene, Niaomh Walsh attempted
to understand the rationale
behind
the
demonstrations
against
the
attacks
on
Afghanistan. Her conclusions
were not clear. As somebody who
went on the 13th October March
against the bombing perhaps I
can offer an explanation.
It is a fact that innocent people in
Afghanistan have died, and
continue to die, due to U.S./U.K.
actions. If we believe the Taliban,
then hundreds of civilians have
already died directly from strikes on
their houses. Disbelieving their
propagandistic claims, we can turn
to the aid agencies, who recently
confirmed the first deaths from
starvation caused by interruptions in
food shipments; or the Pentagon,
who admit typing to the wrong
coordinates into a guidance system
(according to one barely believable
report, confusing longitude with
latitude) with the result of killing
four U.N. mine clearing personnel.
Such killing, quite apart from the
associated refugee crisis, demands
heavy justification. It is not clear
that such a thing is forthcoming.
Nobody needs telling that the
strikes causing such suffering in
Afghanistan are part of a broader
"war on terrorism" proved
necessary by the atrocities of 11th
September. They are, apparently,
necessary to ensure the preservation
of democracy, freedom, and all the
other good things for which the
West stands: if Afghans must die for
these aims then so be it. But what
are the strikes achieving?
Quite apart from the heightened
short term risk of terrorist attacks on
the West caused by bombing (the
FBI has issued an alert to this
effect), it seems all too likely that
more visible suffering in the Islamic
world will simply help recruit more
people to the Al Qaida network,
whether bin Laden is eliminated.
Nor will the destruction of the
Afghan terrorist training camps
suddenly prevent disaffected
extremists from hijacking planes
and causing more deaths. At best
the actions will prove a minor
setback for Islamist terrorists,
hardly justifying the suffering
required to achieve this; at worst
they will help them.
But, we are told, the current actions
are justified as simply one part of this
"war on terrorism": they are just one
Stuart Abercrombie
battle in an ongoing struggle to
preserve essential freedoms: it is
defeatist to deride them as useless per
se. Aside from freezing financial
assets tenuously related to proscribed
organisations, the wider war is ill
defined – we must take it on trust that
the U.S. and its allies are genuinely
guided by moral aims, and that they
will achieve these aims. The difficulty
here is that the West hardly has a
shining record in the area of
international intervention. It simply
has not earned this trust.
At a conservative estimate, America
killed two million people in
Indochina during the Vietnam War –
in a "war on communism".
Whatever one thinks of the motives
behind it this war was an abject
failure with regard to its stated aims,
with a catastrophic result for the
three countries attacked by the U.S.
Before and since, U.S. intervention
in numerous countries has resulted
in widespread suffering: in 1954 in
Guatemala, where they installed a
military dictator – in place of a
democratically elected government
– who immediately started torturing
and killing his own citizens; in
Chile in the 1970s when they helped
install Pinochet, whose record
ought to be well known; and in El
Salvador where they trained death
squads who tortured citizens in the
1980s. These are unfortunately just
a sample of a long list, many of the
details of which are available in
declassified files and congressional
hearings, and are therefore difficult
to dispute. The U.K. has its own far
from exemplary record – take, for
instance its continued supplying of
weapons to the Indonesian
government while they were
slaughtering the East Timorese.
The worst recent example of
Western intervention is in Iraq,
where combined bombing and
sanctions had killed half a million
children by 1996. Apologists like to
dispute the nature of the sanctions,
but if they are fair, why did Denis
Halliday,
former
Assistant
Secretary-General of the U.N.,
resign in 1998, describing the
sanctions as "genocidal"? These
policies are ongoing, and of course
are a primary source of discontent
in the Islamic world. Instead of
addressing that understandable
discontent, however, the U.S.
apparently feels that more bombing
is needed.
Of course, part of the policy relating
to Iraq is supposedly in place to
protect Kurds there. Why does such
concern evaporate when dealing
with Turkey? Turkey, as part of
NATO, seems likely to supply
peacekeeping troops after the fall of
the Taliban. It also took part in
"humanitarian" raids on Kosovo
(raids initiated after seemingly no
real effort to achieve a diplomatic
solution). When it isn’t helping
human rights causes around the
world, however, it’s bombing the
Kurdish people in its own country,
or simply torturing them. The U.S.
shows its concern by supplying
military aid to the regime, much as
it did to Saddam Hussain in the
1980s when he opted for chemical
weapons as the preferred method to
exterminate Kurds.
Another way of gauging how
supportable the attacks on
Afghanistan are is international law.
It has been argued by some that they
are legitimated by a combination of
Article 51 of the U.N. Charter –
allowing limited self-defence – and
two U.N. resolutions passed after
September 11th.
The legality
appears unclear. According to
Michael Mandel, Professor of Law
at Osgoode Hall Law School, the
"war
is
illegal";
Geoffrey
Robertson, Q.C. described it as
"lynch mob justice". Regardless,
the U.S. has not even attempted to
seek explicit U.N. approval, or to
place whatever military action is
necessary under the auspices of the
U.N. One must question, if the
attacks are so obviously justified,
why then, can’t an internationally
accepted body carry them out?
In short, the American record is a
disgrace, and the way things are
being conducted gives little reason
to think anything has changed. If
the U.S. directed action in
Afghanistan is morally justifiable,
and if it achieves its stated aims
without causing unnecessary
suffering, then it would be
unprecedented. Given the weight of
history, and the breathtakingly
hypocritical actions in which the
U.S. is still engaged, the burden of
justification rests overwhelmingly
on the America. It is not for critics
to provide alternatives – it is better
to do nothing than to do harm; it is
for America to prove that what it is
doing is right. This it has not done.
Got a Story?
Got an Angle?
Talk to Us.
Email:
EDITOR@SOTON.AC.UK
Come To:
Pictured :1.Sports:
2.Features:
3.News:
4.Clubs & Socs:
5.Art Guy:
6.Editor:
7.Support:
8.Union:
Christina Cooper
Kate Messer
Imogen Hitchcock
Fiona Cawood
Joel Stobart
Peter Wood
Nick Hampton
Emma
9.Sports:
Susannah Parker
Not pictured:
Naiomh Walsh, the Editor in Chief
and the lovely Emmanuelle Smith Edge Editor & the Edge Team.
the Media Resources
Room on the second
floor of the West
Building
Phone Us
02380 595230
If you have any comments about
our new tabloid style feel free to
email us:
at EDITOR@SOTON.AC.UK
with your comments
Special thanks to:
Photosoc(Simon, Nigel, et al.) for the amazing
pictures. They make this issue special.
Events, for letting us access to “the stars”
Contributors, Thank you, its your voice that will
make this paper great
SCENE SCENE
WESSEX
WESSEX
TEAM MEETING
NEW LOOK!
Interested in joining up?
then come along to our new
team members meeting on
the 7th of november. In the
sports bar at 12:50pm email
editor@soton.ac.uk for more
information.
What do you think of the
new design? Email us with
your comments, ideas
and suggestions. Love it or
hate it we want to know.
email us on
newlook@wessexscene.co.uk
The Wessex Scene is a SUSU publication of IT Publications
WESSEX
PAGE 5
Wessexscene.co.uk
Star Letter Gets
4 Free 6” SUBS
FEED 4 FRIENDS FOR FREE.
Thanks to our friends at subway the
star letter will get 4 free 6” subs
Dear
Editor...
INTERNATIONAL
INTERNATIONAL
Students
Welcome Day this year took place
on October 3rd. Now an annual
event, the day is designed to help
students to find out where to get
help and support within the
University and the Students’
Union and to meet other
International Students studying
at Southampton.
After a morning of formal talks and
introductions
(guest
speakers
included the Vice Chancellor, Bill
Wakeham and the SU President
Stephen Edwards) students were
invited to take part in the afternoon
tea quiz to test their knowledge of all
things British. In the picture round
the Vice Chancellor was variously
identified as Winston Churchill,
Mikhail Gorbachev, and Danny De
Vito, but almost everyone knew what
a ‘pub’ was …!
For those who still craved more
excitement, in the evenings the
students had a chance to sing along
to their favourite songs and Karaoke
Kings and Queens from around the
globe emerged to strut their stuff!
The day was hectic, but everyone
seemed to enjoy it. Plans are afoot
for another social event in the future
– watch this space!
Photos: Simon Blazquez
Dear Editor,
I was shocked and saddened to
read
the
partisan,
and
fundamentally flawed article about
nurses featured in the last Wessex
Scene. The only point I could see in
the article was that nurses in popular
culture have been stereotyping
nurses. Surely, programs like
Casualty, Holby City and others
present a more realistic image than
the Barbara Windsor attitude. The
image of students portrayed in the
article is out of touch and in the
extreme. The attitude the writer uses
harks back to a “Young Ones”
culture. Does the author seriously
believe that his course is easier than
Engineering, Law or Aeronautics?
If nurses are going to complain about
the way they are viewed within the
student population, maybe we should
change our attitudes. Nurses receive
over £5000 a year to go to university,
instead maybe we should think of
them as the prostitutes of the higher
eduction system instead?
J. Andrews
Dear Editor,
I would like to raise my concerns
regarding an unattributed article
in the first edition of the Wessex
Scene. The article "Student Radio
Goes FM" on page 3 was
misleading in describing how
SURGE is funded and the
contribution from SUSU towards
the current RSL (a one month FM
licence).
boast one of the only student radio
stations, in the country, to go FM."
We are not unique - many Unions
with their own AM Radio Station
take this option as the leap to a
permanent FM presence is just too
big. As for raising money - the
SUSU Management Board of 21st
September approved expenditure of
£6270 for the current one month
licence and promotional material.
Any marketing revenue from
external companies will offset this
cost and could reduce this figure to
around half. The Union did not
therefore raise the funds - it merely
spent them.
Finally I will say that this is not the
last chance to get involved in
Student Radio at Southampton SURGE will stay on AM all year and
there is a possibility of another FM
licence in the spring. In the
meantime you might wish to try
tuning in on the SUCS Computer
Workstations on campus by going to
www.surgeradio.co.uk or more
conventionally on 1287AM and for
a short time 87.7FM.
Yours sincerely,
Stephen Edwards Union President
Dear Editor,
As members of the Southampton
University Socialist Students
Society, we are totally opposed to
America and Britain's violent
attacks on Afghanistan.
While of course we condemn the
terrorist attacks on the World Trade
Centre, we believe that war is no
solution to the problems of the
MiddleEast. We are convinced that
the violence has only served to
exacerbate the situation, causing
increased support for Osama bin
Laden and his al-Qaida network.
We are planning to work with other
student groups to organise protests
and public meetings. You can
contact
us
by
e-mail
at
SotonUSS@yahoogroups.com, or
just come along to our informal
weekly meetings every Wednesday
evening at 7pm in the Sports Bar
(Union Building, Level 4). Further
information on the anti-war
movement is available at
http://www.StopWar.org.uk/
Nick Chaffey, Edith Gray, Helen
Jackson, Danny Manning, Ian
Roude, Paul Speller
Send letters via email to editor@soton.ac.uk
TASTES GREAT!
SURGE was formally known as
Radio Glen and broadcast on AM
only for over 22 years. Now known
as SURGE it remains independent of
the Students' Union and falls under
the umbrella of Glen Eyre JCR.
Nevertheless it is entirely selffinancing through funding from
adverts on the SBN (Student
Broadcast Network).
The Students' Union became
involved for the first time last year
by funding the cost of a temporary,
one month, FM licence (known as an
RSL). A maximum of two temporary
licences can be applied for each year
allowing 2 months in 12 to be
broadcast on FM. This first licence
was funded from money received
through compensation following a
problematic Grad Ball some years
ago. The cost of returning this
compensation to the students who
attended was prohibitive and so it
was instead put towards the first
RSL.
It was completely misleading to say
that "By raising an additional
£6500 the Union and SURGE may
127F ABOVE BAR STREET
Beside the Square
ALWAYS OPEN LATE
Now also in East Street
✄
FEED A FRIEND FOR FREE!
Buy any Footlong Sub and a large drink and get a
second Footlong of equal or lesser value FREE
(Not valid with any other offer. One coupon per person
(Your friend must accompany you)
✄
SCENE
With 5 rooms of kicking Pop, Cheese, HIPHOP, RnB, 70s Disco.
Straight from cream in Liverpool, Medication is a great blend of music, booze and atmosphere. So don’t go and rent a video on a
Saturday night go to MEDICATION! Fancy Dress Halloween Medication is on the 3rd of November with cash prizes for the best
costume. Cost is £4 with membership card (Issued at door while stocks last) or £5 without. Cheap drinks including the Med Devil and
the Black Jack.
Photos by
Tim Thornton,
Nigel Massen and Stephen
Edwards
WHERE WERE
It’s not just business support.
It is business critical.
Citigroup’s revolutionary business model is shaping markets, trends, and quite a few careers. Could yours be next?
Technology Presentation: 6th November, 18.30, on campus, The Blue Room, Staff Social Centre.
Sign-up for our presentation at otrecruitment@ssmb.com
To learn more about our real-world opportunities, visit citigroup.com/newgrads/recruits
imagine no limitsSM
©2001 Salomon Smith Barney Inc. Member SIPC. Salomon Smith Barney is a registered service mark of Salomon Smith Barney Inc. Schroders is a trademark of Schroders Holdings plc and is used under license. “Imagine
No Limits” is a service mark of Salomon Smith Barney Inc. Salomon Smith Barney is an equal opportunity employer, M/F/D/V. This advertisement has been approved for distribution in the UK by Salomon Brothers
International Limited, which is regulated by SFA. Citibank is regulated by SFA and IMRO.
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 9
Wessexscene.co.uk
LANDLORDS
DAUGHTER
The Worlds Number 1 Mature
Student Agony Aunt
Foreign Legion offer exotic breaks
abroad and new identities to those
wishing to leave their old self
behind.
Beryl
I’ve got this rash……
Wideboy Tony
Over the summer, I started going
out with this girl and it was all
going very well until I found out
she was my landlord’s daughter. I
know this doesn’t sound like a
problem but now our relationship
is on the rocks and I’m scared
that if I split up with her, her dad
will beat me up and throw me out
of my house. Also, I still want the
sex without actually going out
with her. What should I do?
Anon, 22
Dear Anon,
"You want the sex without going out
with her"? You and every other
male on the planet. You clearly have
only two options, a) tell her, get a
bat to sort her dad out, then make
like Swampy. Bury yourself, some
lager and a few cans of baked beans
under the foundations of the house,
chain yourself to some tree roots
and sit out the storm. Or, b) work at
the relationship, marry the girl and
inherit the house.
Beryl
Dear Beryl,
Since I started going to university,
I’ve never actually done any
work. This wasn’t really a
problem until I failed my re-sits
and got thrown off my course.
Now I don’t have a loan, I have to
pay rent on my house, and I’m
scared to tell my parents. I owe
the bank 4000 pounds and am
having trouble sleeping. Should I
tell my parents even though they
will be very disappointed in me,
or should I just throw myself off a
cliff?
Ex Maths and Philosophy
student, age 20
Cheers, Jeff
Dear Jeff,
Parents. Always a tricky one. I
remember mine with a framed
picture of me holding my freshly
earned 25m swimming certificate.
Happy days. Anyway, the point?
Your parents will always be proud
of you whatever happens. No matter
how lowly the achievement, or how
great the failure it won’t
fundamentally affect their feelings
for you……….in the long term at
least. Alternatively, the French
31 October to 21 November
OUR HANDY DESTINY TIPS:Beware of the man driving the huge
16 wheeler. He is heading straight
for you. And no, he’s not going
to stop.
SHOCKER
Dear Beryl,
Dear Beryl,
The Only Horoscope for
Students worth reading...
Dear Wideboy Tony,
Me too, its doing the rounds.
Beryl
Dear Beryl,
I’m a first year Medical student
living in Connaught, and
although I really love it, I’ve been
having a bit of a problem with a
girl in my block. Basically, on
three different occasions, she’s got
really drunk and accidentally
gone to my room instead of hers
(she lives in the room directly
under mine.) And twice, she
climbed into bed with me naked.
Her friends helped get her out
and back to her own room, but
she never remembers in the
morning. I’m too embarrassed to
tell her, but I don’t want it to
happen again. Help!
Julie, 20
Dear Julie,
It’s a common problem in halls, all
the doors look a bit the same after a
few pints of vodka and orange. Try
talking to her about the next day in
a casual way "Oh my God, you tried
to get in bed again pissed last
night", and hope she takes a hint or
consider using that high tech
security device the university has
provided for your protection. The
lock.
Beryl
Dear Beryl,
I’m a first year with a boyfriend
back at home. He’s putting
pressure on me to leave uni and
move back to York where we’re
both from. He’s a plumber and
never wants to move away from
home. I can’t imagine leaving him
but I don’t want to give up my
course here.
Angela
Dear Angela,
Men. They’re such a small-minded
bunch. Tell him he either wants you
as you are, leading your own life, or
he can sit at home and take care of
his own plumbing. Take a look
around, there’s boys everywhere.
Get yourself a new one.
Beryl
Dear Beryl,
I’ve just found out that my father
is actually my brother and that
my mum and sister work as
hookers for my gran’s porn
company.
James, 19
Dear James,
You’ve got the wrong column love.
I think you need Mr Springer and
the audience.
Beryl.
Dear Beryl,
My boyfriend is a Sabbatical
Officer and as a result I never see
him. The closest I get to an
orgasm these days is by reading
his column in the WessexScene.
Shall I dump him or find a
Fresher to have on the side?
Emily, 21
Dear Emily,
Do neither for the moment - give
him time and be understanding. I
am sure that he will buy you flowers
and chocolates as recompense. On
the other hand, if this does not ensue
I know some very fit 2nd years if
you’re interested?
Beryl
Aries
You may not be on top form at the moment but things are bound
to improve as the sun swings into our romantic sector . You will
pull in the next 2 weeks and if you are already going out with
someone you will be in store for a good time. Destiny points to house
number 69
Taurus
Be careful in the next few days, you are like a bull in a china shop
at the moment. Probably a good time to lay low, relax and avoid
bright lights and strong flavours. Be warned. Destiny points to
green fish
Gemini
The sun is in your quadrant for the next week filled with
explosive relationships and passionate nights. Don’t forget the
Red Bull. Destiny is found in a kebab shop
Cancer
The sun is in the wrong sector for you this week watch out for
trees. They may try something on. Destiny is jumping up and
down in front of your eyes.
Leo
The sun is in your contemplative sector for the next fortnight.
Take the time to think about stuff. Remember you might have
lost the battle, you can still win the war. You will find true love
where drinks are sold
Virgo
To change a habit of a lifetime, it is time to knuckle down to work.
You have made a good love decision, though it is one that
surprises other people. Single? Love is linked to a
pedestrian crossing
Dear Beryl,
I have been at University for 4
years now. Although I was quite
popular for a while last term, this
year it all seems to have gone
downhill.
Have
you
any
suggestions on how to win friends
and influence people?
Natalie, 22
Dear Natalie,
Go out. Get drunk. Get a life. If that
fails I hear that there is a book on
the market called “How to Win
Friends and Influence People”. Just
watch out it’s not taken as “Self
Promotion”.
Beryl
Dear Beryl,
Libra
You will receive a surge of happiness, optimism and energy; but
remember drugs are bad for you. A change of location may prove
beneficial. A conversation about chips turns to love
Scorpio
Although you may not feel in love, deep waters run smooth. How
this relates to your love life you are yet to discover. Love will fall
down some stairs
Sagittarius
The time is right for a switch to a healthier lifestyle. Remember
alcohol is not a solution to all problems, steer away from alcopops
and stick to Juicy Lucy’s. Find fortune in a fishmongers
I’ve slept with every man in my
halls. What do I do now??
Jess, 18
Capricorn
Dear Jess,
Either you can sleep with every
woman in your halls or you can
contact the Accommodation Office
and ask them to move you to new
halls. You can then get started on
some new meat. Congratulations is
due however. Is it a new University
record?
Aquarius
Email your problems
to
Beryl@wessexscene.co.uk
Reflection at this time is important. Keep a mirror with you at
all times. Take time to find out more about yourself. Meeting in
a place full of memories could change your perceptions.
You will lose money and more in the Union Shop
The sun is squaring up to Mars, and you will be in a fight with a
family friend. An ambition that has been delayed can be achieved
if it’s what you want, what you really really want.
Don’t eat yellow snow
Pisces
You have not been lucky in love since you returned, but there is
brightness on the horizon. Your fortunes are changing, next time
you see the person of your dreams they are wearing a bin liner.
Stay away from kebabs. Luck is in a chicken burger
PAGE 10
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
UNIONIN
in the classroom of a Youth Hostel
organised by the NUS South East
Regional officer.
On the Monday morning we not only
spotted a fox but also met a school
party. I felt just like I was back in
Mrs Nightingale’s class 5 at Palmers
Cross Primary School.
With two members absent I promised
Nick Le Prevost I would arrange the
next one when she isn’t at home in
Guernsey and made a mental note to
ensure that next time we bring
Niaomh along by force.
Union Vice
President sends
a variety of
swearwords to
Council
THE period since Union elections
has seen unprecedented levels of
tribal in-fighting, and whether
victim or perpetrator Niaomh
Walsh, the Vice President
(Communications) has, more
often than not, been involved to
some degree.
Things took a bizarre turn for the
worst this week as her report to
Council (which will sit on Monday
29th) began to circulate. Union
Council is the accessible forum at
which most Union matters are aired
and (in an ideal world…) resolved.
Its meetings are formal and its
minutes and reports are archived for
seven years. Students were therefore
astounded when the VP Comms’
report contained two "f#ck"s, one
"tw#t" and one "p#ssed", allegations
of "bitchiness" and partisanship, and
was used to give vent to Ms Walsh’s
personal grievances.
Ms Walsh may well feel that she has
been on the receiving end of poor
judgements and has not always been
dealt with in a respectful fashion.
The above appears to be her view
and she is, of course, entitled to it,
but for a paid Sabbatical Officer (the
Vice President no less!) to make a 14
page report to Council of which a
large part is personal backbiting and
expletives is, by anyone’s standards,
utterly unacceptable.
In Ms Walsh’s defence it must be
said that her report does contains
admissions of fault and recognition
of the need for concessions and
tolerance, but these are couched in
self-justification and underhand
jibes to such an extent that they are
practically worthless.
It is, perhaps, ironic that Niaomh,
whose portfolio as VP Comms
includes
oversight
of
Communications and Editorship in
Chief of the Wessex Scene, fills her
report with so many errors of
spelling and grammar that many
passages are either incorrect or
incoherent.
At the time of writing a motion for
Recall of her Office (for reasons
other than the above report) has been
proposed for Union Council on
Monday 29th.
SCANDAL! The Rat is no more!
Welcome to the first Sex Lies and
Dictaphone tape this year. For the
benefit of Freshers and those who
found last year’s Tales too turgid
and full of in-jokes to be worth
reading, I aim to provide an
objective (almost) and satirical
(very) look at the news, views and
gossip of the University and the
goings-on of your Sabbs!
You are all forgiven for thinking that
the Uni is being demolished, but I
believe that isn’t the case. In a flash
of administrative genius, work to
remove 10 parking spaces and add
"landscaping" outside the library
commenced at the END of summer!
At the same time, the entrance for the
bar is STILL two bricks short of a
building! Just you wait till I explain
the plans for the Debating
Chamber…
In the mean time try to remain calm
in spite of Anthrax Panic. A
suspicious white powder was
discovered in the bar at the
inaccurately named Poundstretcher
on Friday. Further investigation
revealed that it was caused by an exPublic School student from Surrey
who blew his first month’s allowance
from Mummy and Daddy in one hit!
On the Afghan matter, Niaomh (VP
Comms) has sent an envoy to
"Dubya" asking him for airstrikes on
the office of SUSU President
Stephen Edwards, describing life
with him as "an oppressive regime".
But what price inactivity?! Uni’s
own radio station, Surge, launches on
FM on Monday, in spite of her failure
to assist or publicise the station!
Tune in and chill out man…
Remember: I need your juicy news
and scandal, so send it to
pierced.morgan@wessexscene.co.uk
Emily Johnston
Saturday 22nd September
A request for me to appear on BBC
Radio Solent on the Peter White
show had been sat on the top of my
pile of mail for some time. Arriving
with a summary of my favourite
facts on (the lack of) Higher
Education funding and (the size of)
student debt I was greeted by one of
the radio team who led me through to
the studio. Peter White is probably
unique in being a blind radio show
presenter and hence a marvel to
watch as he flicks through Braille
copies of the weather forecast and
traffic reports. After 10 minutes or so
of ‘interview’ we opened the
discussion up to the callers. The
second caller suggested in her
quavering voice "as the students are
spending all of their money on rent
can they not live at home?" Shortly
followed by "but if they have to
move away from home can the
parents not run an exchange scheme
where parents swap ‘children’ so that
they don’t have to pay rent?" With
images of parents and ‘children’
rioting on the streets I grappled
around for a reasoned response.
Tuesday 25th September
At the end of a long day I wandered
over to the Staff Club for another
leaving party for the outgoing ViceChancellor Sir Howard Newby. I
wondered if it was fair to judge
someone’s importance by the
number of "leaving parties" they
have…at least I have it from his own
lips, and contrary to The Guardian
that he "is not an Eminem fan".
Anyway, after a few nibbles, a
couple of speeches and hearing about
the latest property acquisition in
Mexico of a certain Mr Roger Mallet
(Director of Business Services) I was
back to the office.
Thursday 27th September
With Freshers Week approaching,
Christmas a long way ahead and the
stampede of students turning to a
deafening roar, we (the student
executive officers) arranged a buffet
in the Union Bar for staff and their
families. I was surprised to learn that
this small gesture to the staff of
SUSU had never been shown before.
Monday 1st October
Tiger discovered a new hall of
residence today. Through helping me
out with the hall talks Tiger covered
his home turf of Wessex Lane and
met some students in a ‘new’ hall
called "Edwina House". Business
Services seem to have been
frantically fitting out an old people’s
home at the same time as freshers
move in. At least these freshers were
actually told where they were going
to be living…
Anyway, going around the halls
reminded me of two things; my own
days as a JCR President but also how
hard JCRs work.
Next issue (if I haven’t been censored):
Stephen Edwards: a finger in every
pie?!
End of an Era: AU abandons Jesters!
"Improvement"of the Debating
Chamber
W h a t ’s
been going on in SUSU…
£16,000 of hardware missing in
action!
Sunday 23rd September & Monday
24th September
Seven keen members of the Union
Executive Committee leered at me
through the minibus rear view
mirror. Feeling truly paternal, I drove
them off for 2 days of Team-Building
in Swanage: "Are we nearly there
yet?" No paint-balling, just hard graft
Wednesday 3rd October
Following on from the new ViceChancellor, I gave an overview of the
Students’ Union to the International
Student Freshers. I made a particular
mention of the great student deals
that can be found in the Student
Union Travel Centre…useful, I
thought, for International Students.
Some days later, to remind me that
students will always hold me to my
word, some international students
came along to General Office to
‘complain’. They were disappointed
that there were no student fares left
on Eurostar and at the talk the
previous week the "President had
promised…"
Saturday 6th October
Helping out with the bunfight was a
welcome change from what was a
continuous run of talks to freshers. I
was particularly amused by
unwelcome visitors to the bunfight who were, with one notable
exception,
mostly
nightclubs
dumping flyers. The Socialist
Workers Party student society from
the Southampton Institute arrived
about half an hour after the doors
opened demanding they be given a
table. After a frustrated discussion
with an over-worked Michael
George (Clubs & Socs Officer) they
were passed onto me. After hearing
from them "we called and someone
said we could come" and "no, we
don’t know who we spoke to"…I
explained that the bunfight was only
for SUSU student societies and there
simply wasn’t enough space. I think
my suggestion the Socialist Workers
Party to share the stand of the
Socialists Students was probably
taking implied ignorance to a new
level.
Saturday 13th October
Weekends cease to be "2 days off at
the end of the week" but simply
"week-ends". The nice thing about
weekends, though, is that there are
no disruptions - I have no meetings I can get work done and still be home
for dinner! I am sure it said
weekdays 9-5 on the nomination
form…
Anyway
the
brunette
isn’t
particularly happy about the long
hours required…mental note: buy
flowers.
Wednesday 17th October
I had my first radio show on
SURGE! I thought I had mastered all
of the tricky bits when in the second
hour the light in the studio started
flashing to indicate a caller. Correctly
remembering which buttons to press
I managed to speak to the caller
without interrupting the latest release
from Kylie. Who was my only
listener? The Brunette wanted to
know if I was coming to hers for
dinner but mainly to ask if I could
play ‘You Sexy Thing’ – "for
someone who knows who he is". All
I could find was the rather more apt
"Radio Ga Ga".
Mental note: don’t buy flowers.
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 11
Wessexscene.co.uk
SURVIVAL!
The things
you need
to know...
THE thing that a lot of freshers
seem to worry about most is
making friends.
You’ve
probably already sussed that
this isn’t as much of a problem
as you’d first thought, but what
better way to make a lasting
impression on someone than by
saving their life?
Every year, over 500 young people in
the UK develop meningitis or
septicaemia. If treated quickly, this is
not a problem and often it is possible
to make a complete recovery.
However if you leave it and don’t get
attracted a large amount of media
coverage. Most of you will have been
immunised against Meningitis C, so
what’s the problem?
The problem is, that the big danger for
students is meningitis B- the one that
there is currently no vaccine for. This
in itself is not an issue. Whilst the
bacteria can live in the back of the
throat quite happily without causing
us any ill effects. The only time that
How to be a great mate
...save someone’s life!
medical attention, in some cases it can
lead to death.
In Southampton, there have been
meningitis deaths in the past, and it is
quite likely that you will have heard
about them because they have
this becomes a problem is if the
bacteria decide to enter the blood
stream... which can happen at any
time, without warning. Bacteria are
more likely to enter the bloodstream
when the immune system is low. To
help yourself, it is really important to
boost your immunity by eating a few
vegetables, sleeping every now and
then, and not being drunk every night.
Traditionally, these are not things that
students are particularly good at, but
then again traditionally it is students
that contract meningitis, so perhaps it
is worth thinking about. You don’t
need to be a second mother to your
friends, but you could be doing them a
big favour by being there foir each
otherwhether it is by cooking the
occasional meal or simply looking out
for them.
However hard we try, people will
contract meningitis and once the
disease is in the bloodstream they can
become seriously ill in a matter of
hours. To make things even more
difficult, initial symptoms are almost
identical to those of a hangover or flu.
People with the disease may feel
feverish, have pains in their joints or
back, they will probably vomit, and
will almost certainly have a really bad
headache and a stiff neck. Obviously,
the vast majority of people who
experience these symptoms will not
be suffering from meningitis, however
it is really important that you keep an
eye on them. If they develop a dislike
of light, a bruise-like rash that doesn’t
fade under pressure, become
unconscious or very disorientated, it is
essential that you get medical help
urgently.
Keep an eye out for your mates, if you
haven’t seen them around don’t be
afraid to knock on their door and
check that they are okay. There is
information about meningitis all
around the Students’ Union building,
and by remembering the symptoms or
carrying a card in your wallet with
them on, you could well save a
mate’s life.
HOUSE OF
HORRORS
...fighting for decent student accommodation
FAULTY wiring, mould, no
heating... pretty typical for a
student house? One student told
me that poor accommodation was
‘part of the student experience.’ As
far as I can see, the student
experience is about getting a
degree, having fun, and getting
involved in activities that will make
you more employable when you
leave university- now where does
dodgy accommodation fit into that?
More than half of students nationally
live in private rented accommodation,
and the majority of them live with
other people (this housing is referred
to as houses of multiple occupancy or
HMOs). Up to 20% of all HMOs are
legally unfit for human habitation, and
the risk of fire in HMOs is said to be
approximately ten times greater than
in other forms of accommodation.
Landlords are responsible for making
sure that property is kept in good
repair. This means that gutters, pipes,
drains, baths, toilets, sinks, wiring,
piping and heaters must all be kept in
working order.
Once you have
written to your landlord, legally they
must make sure that repairs are carried
out within 1-2 days for emergency
repairs, and 21 days for non-essential
repairs.
However if this is not done,
the next step is to contact the
Environmental Health Service or seek
legal advice (in both cases you can
contact SAIC for more information).
But why should we be subjected to
living in the worst housing anyway?
And when we move out, will the next
tenants not have the same problems
with the landlord?
For many years, the NUS
have argued that HMOs should be
licensed as a way of raising standards
St Denys in Winter
and guaranteeing safety. This is
something that is being considered by
parliament, and so the NUS have
arranged a national lobby to highlight
to MPs the conditions that students
live in, and to urge them to support
the licensing of shared houses.
Shared housing is something that
most students will experience at some
point, however even those of you that
are in halls should get involved. Do
you think that it’s fair that high rent
prices force many students to leave
hall and instead face the unpredictable
quality of housing available in the
private rented sector?
Not all
accommodation
is
bad
accommodation, but often it is the
huge amount of rent asked for better
properties that causes students to end
up in poorer housing.
I have arranged to meet with
our local MP, Alan Whitehead
(former SUSU President) at the
Houses of Parliament on the day of
the lobby, 31st October. Hopefully
we will be able to convince him to
support us. Which is all well and
good, but why am I telling you this?
Well, I need you to do a couple of
things:
* Sign up to attend the House of
Horrors lobby on 31st October by emailing me on edwel@soton.ac.uk.
Coaches will be leaving from the
Students’ Union at 8.30am, and
coming back at about 6pm.
* Take photos of your own
accommodation if you feel that it is
sub-standard and bring them along on
31st, or send them to me in
Membership Services so that I can
present them to Alan Whitehead.
In the meantime, if you are
experiencing problems, remember
that the Student Advice and
Information Centre can offer advice
and practical support. If you do not
have a copy of the housing guide
(which informs you of your legal
rights as well as a whole lot of other
housing information) SAIC is the
place to go to get a copy. For more
information about the lobby, please
contact me, Kate Holmes, VicePresident (Education and Welfare) on
edwel@soton.ac.uk or come in and
see me in Membership Services in the
West Building.
Decent housing is a right, not a
privilege reserved for students that
can afford it. Sign up now for the
lobby on 31st October and make the
difference!
CONDOMS:
CAN’T BE STUFFED?
CONDOMS in the bar is still
happening, however I’m finding it
really hard to get all the condoms
and stuff into bags in time before we
run out again. I need some help! If
you are interested in rubber stuffing,
or would like to be involved in
producing information to go into the
bags(just think how many
thousands of people would see your
work!) then please contact me
a.s.a.p. Thank you! :)
If
you
want
further
information about anything
featured in this edition of
Survival! or you have an idea
for a welfare project please
contact
Kate
Holmes,
Education
and
Welfare
officer,
on
edwel@soton.ac.uk!
Wessexscene.co.uk
If you’ve got a special event or
some important news about
your Club or Society then email
it to fjc199. Anything exciting
and interesting will be sure to
find it onto our new look page!
If you want the event to be
covered and captured in its full
The play centres around Julia
Darrow, an independent graphic
designer whose personal life comes
second to her career. It’s not
surprising, therefore, when she
embarks upon an affair with a
married colleague, John Haddrell.
However, when John suddenly dies
in the car on the way to a ‘dirty
weekend’ with Julia, (who is
seriously injured herself) she
receives an unexpected visitor - his
wife Margaret!
As Julia’s counsellor, Anne Bennet
says, “When we lose someone close
to us and we’re not with them, we
often need to find a way to be part
of their death. To share it.” But
how much can they share without
Julia’s secret getting out? And how
much does Margaret know? As the
relationship between the two
women deepens Julia becomes
more and more dependant on
Margaret, and Margaret is only to
happy to help - but why?
‘Dead Guilty’ (co-produced and codirected by Caroline Burton and
Katherine Hicks) has a cast of only
WESSEX
photographic glory then email
photo@soton.ac.uk and they
will provide you with stunning
piccies to accompany your
article.
So let me know what you’re all
up to and fill this page!
Cheers,
Fiona xx
Dead Guilty
Fancy a scare this Halloween?
You’re in luck. After last years
success ‘The Dark’ Southampton
University Theatre Group presents
‘Dead Guilty’ a psychological
thriller by Richard Harris that is
bound to give you chills.
SCENE
Caroline Burton
four, which has meant a lot of
intensive work for all involved.
Katherine Hicks says: “I saw a
production of ‘Dead Guilty’ a few
years ago in London and thought it
was brilliant, I knew it would make
a great Halloween production. The
ending still gives me goose pimples
and I’ve seen it a million times
now! Putting the play together has
been really hard work but it’s
definitely been a fantastic
experience - I hope the cast would
agree with that!”
Laura Stevely and Lizzi Allaway
star as Julia and Margaret whose
lives are turned upside down by
John Haddrell’s death.
James
Gaynor play’s Julia’s home help and
admirer, Gary whilst Kristiina Paul
plays Anne Bennet, Julia’s
counsellor.
‘Dead Guilty’ opens on Wednesday
31st October (Halloween) with
performances on Thursday 1st and
Friday 2nd November in Arts H at
7.30pm. Tickets are priced at £4 for
students and concessions, and £5 for
adults.
Find
out
more
‘Dead
Guilty’
and
forthcoming
theatre
productions at:
www.soton.ac.uk/~theatre
about
other
group
Orchestra drinks a lot in foreign country!
THE Southampton University
Symphony Orchestra, SUSO,
continued their successful run of
tours this summer. Around 60
members of the orchestra braved
the thought of inevitable alcohol
abuse and sleep depravation to sit
on a coach for 36 hours with only
the challenging intellect and
cinematic beauty of the film
‘Freddie Got Fingered’ to keep
them sane.
Having previously toured Edinburgh,
Prague, Budapest and Dublin, Poland
is the furthest that the orchestra has
travelled and it was well worth the
journey. The orchestra performed
three concerts in all, one in St.
Katherine’s Church near the famous
town square of Krakow, one in
Lowicz Cathedral, and one in the
newly refurbished hall of the Chopin
Academy of Music in Warsaw.
SUSO drew from the repertoire of
their previous season and played,
amongst other things, Tchaikovsky’s
Symphony No.6 ‘Pathetique’, and
Saint-Saens’ Symphony
No.3
‘Organ’, with music graduate Marcus
Reeves playing the organ. SUSO
Bouncers
Michael George
Theatre Group are putting on
‘Bouncers’ by John Godber, - a portrait
of urban nightlife. A cast of four men
play over 20 characters including
bouncers at a nightclub, a bunch of lads
out on the razz and a gaggle of girls on
the pull. The action also features a
nightmare taxi ride, a drunken bunch of
Wessex Rangers and a Swedish porn
movie. The cast includes our favourite
AU President, ‘Tiger’ as ‘Lucky Eric’
the senior bouncer whose ex wife
comes to the club to pull other men.
Come and see it in Arts H, 17 - 19th
November, 7:30pm. Tickets from
£3.50... Oh and if you’re an AU
member turn up or Tiger will probably
freeze your budget!
Chris Bishop
were conducted by their professional
conductor Robin Browning, and the
2000/2001 assistant conductor David
Smith who now conducts the newlyformed Symphonic Wind Orchestra.
As anticipated there were plenty of
opportunities to stay out late and get
extremely drunk, which young and
old threw themselves into with great
enthusiasm. The opportunity for
sight seeing was also good. A tour
around the popular Wieliczka salt
mines and a group photo in the
famous Cathedral carved in the salt
was a surreal and interesting
experience. Visiting the site of
Auchwitz was far more sobering and
an un-missable experience for
anyone visiting Poland.
Everyone had a fantastic time and
most managed to sober up before the
SUSO annual Pre-Term orchestral
course. This, obviously was a wasted
period of cold-turkey as the festivities
kicked of with a challenging quiz
held in the Chamberlain Bar: cheapalcohol-a-plenty. SUSO run this
course every year to promote music
at the University and to encourage
freshers to take part. Organised on
the whole by David Smith as part of
the assistant conductor’s job the
orchestra included 40 new students
supplemented by musicians already
at the University.
After a week of intense beer drinking
and a little playing, David conducted
the final performance to a near
capacity audience at the Turner Sims
Concert Hall. The programme
included
Vaughan
Williams’
Symphony No.5 and the world
premiere of ...in transit... by Fung
Lam who is currently studying a
postgraduate in composition here in
Southampton. Fung said, “It was an
amazing experience to hear my piece
played so well by a group of 80
friends. It was the best way to hear
the first performance.”
There is plenty more information
about SUSO, including pictures
of both the tour and pre-term
course, and information on
upcoming concerts on their new
website www.suso.org.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 13
Wessexscene.co.uk
S
WX
Photography by COLIN SUMMERS - ‘Storm Coming’
One Small Step
Fresher’s Street
Devil’s Advocate
PAGE 14
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
One small step
‘They were the devil’s handwork and carried his signature: they were cheap to make and expensive to clear,
easy to lay and hard to detect: and besides, they knew no cease-fire’.
Photography by COLIN SUMMERS - ‘Girl with a mortar’
THIS is how the former MP
Martin Bell eloquently described
landmines in his maiden speech in
the House of Commons in 1997.
The United Nations estimates that
one hundred and ten million
landmines are now strewn across
the world. This is only a figure;
the reality is that millions of
people live day-to-day with the
threat of landmines destroying
their lives. I have seen the effects
of landmines, through my fivemonth teaching placement in
Vietnam, the limbless children,
and the signs banning entry. But I
never had the capabilities to
capture the immense feeling of
human tragedy in a single second.
I met Colin Summers in July 2001.
He was armed with his portfolio of
photographs just after his return
from his most recent expedition to
South East Asia. Colin’s travels like
his cameras have advanced over the
last ten years. After his travels in the
early 1990s in South East Asia and
India he was enthused to take an Alevel in photography. His studies led
him to become stimulated by Don
McCullin’s images of conflict
around the world. Colin returned to
South East Asia this year and visited
Cambodia, seven years after his first
visit.
photographed the clearance of
unexploded ordnance dropped by
the Americans during the secret war
in the 60’s and 70’s.
season so there is no such thing as a
safe paddy field.
On the surface the country seemed
much more stable, but still hidden in
the countryside were millions of
landmines. The landmines can
become re-located through the rainy
Who has left a lasting impression
on you, not just your camera film,
through your photography of the
consequences of landmines?
‘Akira clearing’
I asked Colin why his latest
expedition differed from his
previous travels?
I was now travelling for the purpose
of taking photos rather than ambling
around taking pictures of things of
interest on the way. I had a change
of camera a Nikon F100, chosen
because of its strength and
durability but the downside is its
weight. When I arrived in South
East Asia early this year I headed
into
northeast
Laos
and
Kate
Messer
Photography by COLIN SUMMERS
Cambodia possesses an estimated
four to six million landmines dotted
throughout the countryside with the
mines awaiting their victims. Since
the Mine Ban Treaty in 1997 one
hundred and fourteen countries
have ratified it. The fifty-four
countries that refused to sign,
including the USA, Russia and
China are still free to use, produce,
trade and stockpile anti-personnel
mines. The stark reality is that for
every fifty thousand mines cleared
in the world approximately two
million new ones are laid a year.
Colin has captured multiple feelings
through his camera, reflecting the
day-to-day effects of landmines on
the people of Cambodia.
On my first trip to Cambodia I had
met Akira. He was clearing mines,
which he admitted he had once laid.
He was aiming to display the mines
and weapons he had retrieved in a
museum that he was establishing
just off the road to Angkor Wat in
Siam Reap. I found his life story
deeply moving. From the age of five
the Khmer Rouge, who had killed
his parents, brought him up. At the
age of ten he was shown how to use
firearms. So when the Vietnamese
invaded Cambodia in 1979, Akira
had already learnt how to fire
machine guns, rocket launchers and
to lay mines. He was thirteen when
the Vietnamese captured him and
told he could either fight against the
Khmer Rouge or be killed. He
decided to fight and was
conscripted into the Vietnamese
army and forced to fight on the front
line. Akira stayed with the
Vietnamese until they pulled out in
1990. He then joined the
Cambodian army who were still
fighting the Khmer Rouge in the
north and north west of the country.
In 1993 he worked with the UN
clearing land mines and now has a
nine-year collection of diffused
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 15
Wessexscene.co.uk
Photography by COLIN SUMMERS ‘Family Group’
ones on display. While I was with
Akira he showed me how to find
mines and diffuse certain mines and
even how to lay booby traps using
crude explosives.
I returned earlier this year to
Cambodia to try to gather more
information about mines from Akira
only to find that his museum had
closed and he was in a hammock
contemplating his future. The
government had forced him to close
and are now going to confiscate
everything he’d collected. Akira
worked on a donation basis and a lot
of the money went to help the
victims of land mines. The
government is expected to open its
own museum in Seam Reap and
cash in on the many tourists now
visiting Angkor Wat. For Akira he
has no choice but to give up the life
he had managed to rebuild and try
and start afresh.
I spent some time with Akira and
his wife and also visited the hospital
and rehabilitation centre for land
mine victims. I photographed many
of the patients: -men, women and
children. I also tried to gather more
information on the growing number
of civilians still being maimed
every day.
I have now reached the stage when I
am no longer in the distance with a
long lens; I get close to people and
try to understand their situation so
as to be able to portray how they
feel in a single expression.
Do you feel that since the death of
Diana Princess of Wales the
public interest in landmines in
Cambodia has decreased?
I once spoke to Akira about Princess
Diana and was surprised to hear that
he had never even heard of her. I
feel there was no public interest in
landmines in Cambodia to start
with. I think public interest was
‘I once spoke to Akira
about Princess Diana and
was surprised to hear that
he had never even
heard of her.’
directed towards African and
Eastern European counties, but like
many issues people need to be
reminded regularly, otherwise
problems far away can be easily
forgotten.
Have there been any scary
moments
regarding
photographing subjects related to
landmines?
Yes. Most of these go back to when
I first visited Cambodia in 1993.
Then the country was lawless and
life was cheap. Scary moments
regarding photographing subjects
relating to land mines-not really
anything major-just the thought of
what might happen! When you see
how many people are without
limbs and photograph them close
up you realise that the devices in
the ground are real. There are a lot
out there and they know no ceasefire.
What do you think students can
do to assist in raising the profile
of the effects of landmines?
A difficult question and to be
honest, I am still trying to think of
a way I can help!
What is your next assignment?
I have no solid plans but I will be
returning to the Far East at the end
of the year. Back to Cambodia and
travelling to the northeast of the
country. I hear there are not many
people getting out there, because
of the tough travelling conditions
and problems with bandits. We’ll
see!
Colin has shown the everyday
reality of living with landmines in
Cambodia. However, the menace
of landmines is becoming a
greater global issue by the day. I
feel that a global consensus on the
eradication of landmines must be
imposed for the preservation of
humanity.
www.icbl.org
- International
Ban Landmines
Campaign
to
PAGE 16
TIMMY MALLETT is one of the
most original role models kids
have ever had. He appeared in full
force at the freshers’ ball and
eventually I managed to corner
him!
Did you go to university?
I went to Warwick University and
read history on and off.
When did you graduate?
Last year!
Where did the idea for
‘Wackaday’ come from?
‘Wackaday’ was the replacement
show for Roland Rat when he left to
go to the BBC. We already had the
‘Wide-Awake Club’ so we extended
it to ‘Wackaday’ in the school
holidays.
Were there any hidden secrets to
‘Wackaday’?
No lots of people think there were.
You could do a ‘wackawave’ in the
car or build a big ‘W’ in the sand but
nothing hidden. By watching the
show you could take part; that was it.
You haven’t been in the public eye
much since the early 1990s, what
have you been up to?
I have my own production company, which produces shows such as
‘Timmy Towers’. ‘Timmy Towers’
started in April this year and takes
‘Wackaday’ a stage further. The
audience are written into the show
and we have a script, which we
didn’t have on ‘Wackaday’.
Do you feel the freshers here
tonight are the generation of
‘Wackaday’?
It ‘s amazing; they want wackaday
to be exactly the same! A person
once said if children love you at
seven they will love you forever and
I think that’s been proven true
tonight.
People have come up to me tonight
and told me their special memories
from the show. One person told me
that they liked it when I was on the
equator and that’s what got them into
science.
Mike Myers was on the Wide
Awake Club with you, are you still
in contact with him? And if you
were offered a role in Austin
Power’s 3 would you take it?
Yeah, I do see him. Whenever Mike
comes to England to promote a film
of any sort he’s never asked about his
movies but what was it like working
with Timmy! He’s told me that he
can’t escape the Wide Awake Club,
or me.
If he wanted me to do Austin
Power’s 3 of course I would do itI’ll let him phone me!
Did you have anything other than
a professional relationship with
Michaela Strackhan?
I love Michaela; I think she is sweet
and gorgeous but nothing else to
report.
Who would you most like to wack
with you Mallett and why?
I would like to mallett Tony BlairI’ve hit his wife and his children at
Panto a couple of years ago. It would
be really fun to put George W Bush
against Tony Blair and play mallett’s
mallett
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
Wide Awake?
‘BUSIER THAN EVER’ Toby
Anstis claims. He escaped from
the Children’s BBC broom
cupboard and now has his own
show on Heart 106.2FM in
London, has a game show on Sky
and is in the middle of a school
disco tour. He is wearing his
schoolboy’s uniform and not too
sexy underwear (I saw!). He can’t
stop laughing as the chants for
‘Timmy, Timmy, Timmy’ go on
behind us.
Toby Anstis read marketing and
psychology at Surry University,
graduating in 1992. He claims he
never planned to become a TV
presenter but his lucky star must
have been shining bright when he
met the Live and Kicking floor
manager at his dad’s Christmas
party. As a result he was invited to
the Live and Kicking Christmas
bash where he met his then to be
producer in the broom cupboard.
Even he say’s going straight from
University to national TV is bizarre!
Toby was given the choice of the
broom cupboard or Blue Peter- but
chose the free style of the broom
cupboard rather than the ‘here’s one
I made earlier tight format of BP’.
He talks about the ‘Brat Pack’ days
of the late 1990s, when ZoÎ Ball,
Jamie Theakston, Andy Peters and
himself were regulars in the teen
magazines. But sees Ant, Dec and
Kate
Messer
Cat as the new children TV stars.
What do you think of the new
BBC Saturday morning show?
There is such a heritage with
channel 3 at the moment, everybody
wakes up and presses button 3. The
BBC had that going for 15 years but
they’ve lost it for the moment,
SMTV is the better show.
Danny Behr is properly one of the
most curious castings in children’s
telly, put diplomatically. But good
luck to her.
What
do
you
think
of
Southampton?
My Aunt and Uncle used to own the
post office in Bishops Warthom, so
I’ve been to the city loads. I’m an
Arsenal supporter so today’s results
is great (Southampton lost to
Arsenal at St Mary’s 0-2). The
university seems great but I’ve got
to get back to London tonight as I’m
on at the Clapham Grand at 2am for
a school disco set.
What’s the best advice anyone has
ever given you in the TV
business?
Be nice to everyone. If you burn any
bridges your never get anywhere.
And you’ve got to be able to be
natural; this industry is so intense
and close nit you have to be.
Who is the best person you’ve
ever interviewed?
Boy George, he has led such a
colourful life and he’s now come
back with a cult following.
Who would
interview?
you
want
to
George Michael but he seldom does
interviews and he chooses who
interviews him.
Finally Hearsay or Liberty?
Hearsay, they were the originals.
But I saw Darius on Pop Idol tonight
‘hit me baby one more.....’ what a
tosser!
October 30th 2001
Photo: Paul Cornwell
Keeping Music Live
PIERCE-ING IT DOWN INPORTSMOUTH
Gorky’s • Super Furry Animals • American Pie 2 • Paradise Club •
30TH OCTOBER 2001
Editorial
THE EDGE
TEAM
Editor: Emmanuelle Smith
Assistant Editor: Paul Cornwell
Dance: Charlotte Devalda
Film: Tim Houghton
With: Nimalan Thanigasapapathy,
Satwant Phander, Sam Ferguson,
Barney Sprague, Amos Usiskin,
Tim White, Christopher
Bienemann, MC Spoonie, Amos
Usiskin
The Edge
S.U.S.U
Highfield
Southampton
S017 1BJ
tel: 023 805955230
fax: 023 80595252
e-mail: theedge@soton.ac.uk
Published by S.U.S.UCopyright 2001
Got any reviews, film/music
articles or random rants?
Well e-mail them now to
theedge@soton.ac.uk- We’re
going mad doing everything
ourselves!!!! HELP!!
PA G E 2
THE NEWS...
with EDGE hound Paul Cornwell
Photo: Emmanuelle Smith
Ok. First things first. The
band on the cover -for
those of you who didn’t
get
our
ohsoclever
ohsofunny
punis
Spiritualized. So if you want
to know what they were
like live (according to Paul,
brilliant) then turn to the
review on page 6. Actually,
the past few weeks have
been surprisingly excellent
for live music, so if you
didn’t make any of it, fret
no more. We here at the
EDGE did all the hard
work for you and all you
have to do is sit back, read
these quality pages and
pretend you were there.
And then tell us what you
think, give us some
feedback, tell us you hate
us.Whatever. It’d at least be
nice to know that
someone’s reading this.
Anyway, enough waffling, I
know you really really want
to get on with reading the
EDGE. So I’ll let you get on
with it.
Cheers,
Emmanuelle
Welcome to...
The
EDGE
TOP
10
Our guide to the
best music related
(ish) websites!
Check them out
baby!
Neil Hannon: maybe he’ll have time to have a haircut now
T
he Divine Comedy
are to split. The group who
started a European tour
recently will finish the tour
as planned and then disband.
Sources close to the band
have hinted that Neil
Hannon will remain with
Parlophone, the band’s
record label but it is
unknown what is to happen
to the rest of the group.
A spokesperson for the
group said: “The band are
splitting but in essence The
Divine Comedy has always
been Neil Hannon. Neil
continues to be signed to
Parlophone and is working
on a new record for release
next year. The band have
been working for six years
with this line-up so it’s very
sad.” I thought they already
had split up myself.
D
estiny’s Child are set
to be the latest group to
release plastic [blow up?]
dolls. The figures have
already been released in the
US, with the range featuring
replicas of all three
members in the blue outfits
worn at this year’s Grammy
Awards.
A UK spokesperson for the
dolls’ manufacture, Hasbro,
was unavailable to confirm
whether the items are to be
released in UK toyshops [oh,
that sort of doll].
T
2. For blowing your loan...
www.roughtrade.com
£1.5million 12ft high steel
perimeter fence, have left
them desperate to increase
the capacity by 20,000.
Whether they will be
granted the extended licence
is currently unknown but is
unlikely after the estimated
capacity of the 2000 festival
was 200,000. Eavis was fined
£6,000 for the breach of the
licence conditions.
4. For your comic pleasure...
www.fantagraphics.com
A
6. For the best wekend in
your life...
www.alltomorrowsparties.c
o.uk
urin Brakes recently
performed a secret roof top
gig on top of The Orange
Shop in West London.
Celebrating the release of
their recent single ‘Emergency
72’. The gig was more than
slightly reminiscent of The
Beatles gig on the Apple
rooftop in the 60’s. Both
played three songs,‘Underdog
(Save Me)’, ‘The Door’ and
‘Emergency 72’ to 200 fans
and onlookers.
female teenage So
Solid Crew fan who had
her jaw broken by one of its
members has hit out at the
verdict handed to her
attacker, saying she feels “let
down” that he escaped a
prison sentence.
Mi
T
chael Eavis is seeking
to increase the capacity of the
2002 Glastonbury Festival
to 135,000. Organisers have
appealed for the licence to
extend crowd size due to
high costs. The extra security
measures,
including
a
1. For brilliant radio...
www.wfmu.com
he Home Secretary has
announced that Cannabis is
set to be downgraded to a
“Class C” drug. This means
that possession of de Ganj
will be no longer be an
arrestable offence by some
time next spring. Bo!
3. For raising your spirits...
www.spiritualized.com
5. For all you’ll ever need to
know...
www.nme.com
7. For music journalism on
par with the Edge...
www.furious.com/perfect
8. For celebrity heaven...
www.asseenonscreen.com
9. For Xen kids...
www.ninjatune.com
10. For mean pussies...
www.mycathatesyou.com
30TH OCTOBER 2001
Random...
WASTE YOUR LOANS,
GO TO THESE...
NOVEMBER
3rd- Waterboys @ Guildhall
6th- Six by Seven @ Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms
7th- David Kitt @ Joiners Arms
24th- Plastik @ Guildhall
27th- Napalm Death @ Nexus (I swear!)
DECEMBER
11th- Wheatus @ Guildhall
13th- Faithless + Kosheen @ Guildall
16th- So Solid Crew + Oxide and Neutrine
NIGHTS
OUT
PA G E 3
30TH OCTOBER 2001
SINGLES
4 HERO
Les Fleur (Talkin Loud)
From the very start of bass driven
beauty your heart starts to skip
beats. It is a complete reworking
of the Minnie Ripperton classic,
featuring the most glorious and
lush vocals of Carina Andersson.
It is just fantastic deep beats with
fantastic vocals backed up by a
sixteen piece string and brass
section. It swoops and it soars
but most importantly it makes
you take a deep breath and just
smile.
10/10
PC
A L B U M S
KEVIN TIHISTA’S
RED TERROR
Don’t Breathe a Word
(Atlantic Records)
Kevin Tihista hails from Chicago
where he has built himself a
reputation as a reclusive genius.
Formally the bassist with largely
ignored rockers Triple Fast
Action; Kevin has taken a far
more mellow approach to his
debut solo album. Kevin Tihista has
an undeniably good voice and this is
the albums main selling point, but
despite the praise heading his way
from all corners of the press, I feel
that his songs are lacking
something. There only appears to
be one theme to the entire album,
that of heartbreak, and this is
delivered unimaginatively and in the
first person throughout. That’s not
to say this is a bad album, but over
the course of an entire album it
would be nice to have a little
variation in both style and
content. There has been a wealth
of acoustically based albums
released over recent months and
if this has left you gagging for
more then you could do a lot
worse than this- album just don’t
expect to hear any lyrical genius
or musical experimentation.
6/10 CB
BLUETIP
Post Modern Anthem
(Dischord)
PLAYGROUP
Number One
(Source)
ALICIA KEYS
Fallin’
(Arista)
Original lyrics? An original beat?
An original tune? Well in a word,
no.This new release is lacking in
all the above departments.
However, this does not make it a
bad record.What does it the fact
that it is repetitive and strikes
you as the kind of record that a
DJ could use as a stopgap while
he frantically searches for
something half decent. Definitely
won’t be a number 1, but may
manage to weedle its way into
the charts. Overall: funky but
flawed.
Alicia Keys is a sprightly young
American girl whose voice is
nothing short of amazing. Before
some of the music betrays her as a
twenty-first century artist it would
be easy to believe that she was a
blues singer from earlier last
century.
Her beautiful voice and
accompanying piano tell a tale told
many times before in a similar style
“I keep on fallin’ in and out of love
with you”, but there’s something
very refreshing and heartening.
Alicia may be poised to shake the
current US posturing music scene
to it’s roots and clear out the crap.
I hope she succeeds.
5/10
MCS
THE DANDY WARHOLS
Bohemian Like You
(Capitol)
Re-released on the back of the
current Vodafone TV ad, it’s more
than likely you’ve already heard
this tune. If not, it’s absolutely
sweet. A head bobbing, grin
inducing, “I’m so happy every one
else can fuck off” sort of tune
.Fairly typical for the Dandy
Warhols, a good band probably
condemned to having their only
hits off of the back of adverts.
Hey ho, bloody good tune
though, even if I don’t believe in
record company re-releases.
8/10
PC
9/10
PC
Six By Seven
So Close
(Mantra)
Hey, where’s the guitars? All I can
hear is a wonderfully edgy halfdiscordant half-melodic electric
piano riff smothered in Chris
Olley’s compelling vocals.
Unfortunately, when the
overdriven guitars do enter the
mix halfway in, the track reverts to
six-by-seven-by-numbers (no pun
intended) while lacking all the
glorious bile of tracks such as ‘Eat
Junk Become Junk’ or downright
beauty of 88-92-96. Worth a listen
if only for the start.
5/10 TH
PA G E 4
6 years worth of songs, 5 new tracks,
and 5 rare or out of print numbers
make up Post Mortem Anthem, a
Bluetip retrospective from 19952001.The album sees Bluetip (label
mates with Fugazi incidentally) evolve
from a purely punk-rock band, to a
more textured, post-punk
sound.(okay, so I’m crap at describing
punk music- give me a break)
Anyway, this is the first time I’ve
heard Bluetip proper, and I think the
album makes for a perfect
introduction. Actually, I’m off to buy
their entire back catalogue right now.
Oh, no I forgot. I’ve spent my entire
year’s budget already. Oh well.
9/10
ES
A SILVER MT. ZION
MEMORIAL ORCHESTRA
& TRA-LA-LA BAND
Born Into Trouble as the
Sparks Fly Upwards
(Constellation)
And the band plays on irrespective
of regards, regardlessAs the sparks fly upwards the
guitars crunch into themselves and
a lone voice disintegrates with
sadness..a solitary protest in a sea
of despair falling off away now
and/or now.
The spectre of 11/09/2001 hangs
heavy on this work low down but
this work was made before these
numbers.... Prediction//hindsight
combined in harmony
- ”this glorious new century, w/all
its ... billion dollar death rays and
supermax penitentiaries, and its
goddamned evermore refined,
irrational, and terminal economies
of blood, misery and slow fucking
doom?” read the notes in the
sleeve- a useless warning to
governments who won’t hear - a
musical equivalent to Barbara Lee’s
lone stand in the house of
representatives, casting congress’
only vote against giving the
president a free hand to attack
suspected terrorists.
-”Am I angry? You bet I am. I am an
American citizen, and my leaders
have taken my money to fund mass
murder. And now my friends have
paid the price with their lives”,
wrote Michael Moore , putting in
words the sentiments of this
record, indeed of every record by
the godspeed collective.
FACTS
A- the band is bigger than before introducing new members, Beckie
Ian Jessica
B- Best tracks , v) Could’ve moved
mountains viii) the triumph of our
tired eyes
C- this album is fucking brilliant
Warning: Due to the size/publicity
of the godspeed collective, they are
“a bunch of hypocrites and liars”,to
quote
sentiments
about
RADIOHEAD conveyed by ASMZ
frontman Efrim in an interview
with OOR magazine (13 Jan 2001):
“The media always assumes they
can get in everywhere for free”
said Efrim explaining why the band
made the media pay for tickets to
London shows.
“If we let the media in for free,
then in principal you’re giving
money to Pepsi and that to me is a
completely ridiculous notion.”which presumably is the same
reasoning that ASMZ use when
they allow me to get my copy of
this latest album for free.We have
ads for Shell y’know (see the last
page).
Still, aminor gripe with an album
this good, —and on the plus side,
all the money from those tickets
did go to The Adult Literacy and
Basic Skills Unit.
A positioning of band politics on
the outside of the music ‘bizz’, (on
the outside of the likes of
Sony/Epic et al.) - that an epic
uproar of strings incites the land
mass shift under this band of black
emperors in silent support of
those who don’t believe- is
undoubtedly a good thing. Yet it
will undoubtedly be ignored.
“Please know, or already
understand,this record is so
fucking useless as a one way
transmission” confess the sleeve
notes
9/10 TH
30TH OCTOBER 2001
A L B U M S
!
d
r
o
c
e
r
s
i
h
t
y
u
B
That Bloke out of Starsailor
STARSAILOR
Love Is Here
(Chrysalis)
Photo: PC
Starsailor have come a long
way in a reasonably short
period of time. It was only just
over six months ago that they
were on their first tour proper,
just after the release of their
first single and their first bit of
coverage in the NME.
Now Starsailor have
completed and released their
superb debut album and are on
their first ‘big’ tour (they’ve
just visited the Pyramids in
Portsmouth as opposed to the
Wedgewood rooms on their last
trip). They’ve had major
HOOD
Cold House
(Domino)
PULP
We Love Life
(Island)
Pulp are a band who, although
they owe a lot of their success to
the Britpop era, wish they had
never been swept up in it. For
Pulp want to move on and aren’t
afraid of losing some of the ‘Pop’
fans. Hence the dark and
disillusioned yet thoroughly
excellent 1998 release ‘This is
Hardcore’.
Pulp have been in the wilderness
for over three years now, with the
pressure on them to deliver a new
album mounting by the month.
Especially when stories abound
of being nearly finished only to be
followed shortly by a confession
that all of the work up to that
point has now been scrapped. The
fact that reclusive legend Scott
Walker was in the production seat
also only flamed the fires.
‘We Love Life’ is a long way
from most of the Pulp back
catalogue and does reflect a band
that appear to be becoming
redundant to the current music
scene. There are no great sing
along anthems, no outwardly
happy tunes, in fact it is
admittedly their “necessary
purging”.
Where once soaring pop tunes
would have lied we now get
almost tuneless monologues from
Jarvis (‘Weeds II (Origin Of The
Species)’ and the god awful
‘Wickerman’). Most of the tunes
other than these are pleasant
enough and one half of recent
double a-side single ‘Trees’ is
fairly typical.
The great songs on the album are
the closing two. ‘Roadkill’ is a
slow and beautiful number in
which Jarvis shows that he can
sing well backed up by simple
guitar. The last track on the
album, the other half of the double
a-side, ‘Sunrise’ is the best song
on ‘We Love Life’ and is
hopefully an indicator of where
they are heading in the future.
6/10 PC
There is a long running joke
between a couple of my student
housemates
which
goes
something along the lines of;
Housemate 1 : “What’s that
weird music you’re listening to,
Tim”
Housemate 2 (pretending to be
me) : “Oh that, that’s just a bowl
of Rice Krispies I left by my
broken speaker”
Although this joke against my
taste in music and my taste in
breakfast cereal is completely
IAN BROWN
Music Of The Spheres
(Polydor)
King Monkey returns with his
third solo album at a time when
it feels as if he isn’t going to fit in
with the new crowd, or the old
crowd either. Ian’s been out on
his own for a while now and it’s
possible to see his style maturing
and developing across his solo
albums from the little scally that
he was in to, dare I say it, a
mature artist.
‘Music Of The Spheres’ is a well
developed album that has had a
lot more time spent on the
production than the previous
outings.The album is much more
Or Else...
airplay on Radio 1 with their most
recent single ‘Alcoholic’, which is
the weakest track on the album,
and are set to conquer all.
‘Love Is Here’ is pretty much
everything you’d expect and more.
Every song is wonderfully crafted,
delicate and moving. Yet this isn’t
at the sacrifice of tunes you can
hum or the good mood that you
were in. The songs are beautiful
and James Walsh’s voice is as
endearing and grand as ever.
The songs that they toured back
last march have all come in to
fruition and even other previous
singles ‘Fever’ and ‘Good Souls’
sound delightfully fresh and
invigorated. Traces of their
influences are present at many
points on the album, but they
never said it was going to be
any other way and there’s
certainly nothing wrong with
that.
The album is seamless and
and every sonmg lingers inyour
mind the melodies pervading
your subconscious until you
give in and let them roam free
in your head.
I challenge any one of you to
blare out ‘Talk Her Down’,
‘Good Souls’ or ‘Coming
Down’ and try not to admit that
Love Is Here.
8/10
PC
unfounded (I usually prefer
Frosties), I have to admit that
listening to the opening section of
Hood’s “This is what we do to sell
out(s)” from ‘Cold House’ is not
entirely dissimilar to listening to a
super-deluxe digitally enhanced
bowl of Rice Krispies. Indeed the
rhythm sections from a number of
tracks on this, Hood’s third full
lengther, are in the vain of
contemporary electronic releases
that wouldn’t be out of place in
more abstract experimental pieces.
On top, however, Hood generally
add a layer of warmth much more
in line with the ambience of their
previous albums - beautiful double
tracked melodies realised on a
well conceived combination of
guitar, synth and cello.
These elements, together with
an admirable willingness to
experiment
with
vocals
(particularly on the excellent
opening track “They removed
all trace that anything had ever
happened here”.) make for a
slightly less accessible but
ultimately much more enduring
listen than Hood has produced
thus far. A tentative but well
timed step in the right
direction.
of a dub affair than any of Ian’s
previous work and has been
approached in a far more serious
manner as well. The only
disappointment is the lack of
discernible sing along tunes.
First single ‘F.E.A.R.’ is one of the
closest songs on the album to a sing
along, but it is a million miles away
from classics such as ‘Corpses’ and
‘My Star’. Other standout tracks on
the album include the warm and
exciting ‘El Mundo Pequeno’ and
final track ‘Shadow Of A Saint’.
With his summer festival foray,
headlining V2001, going down
unexpectedly well things look like
they might be on the up for a man
with notoriously bad luck. With all
thoughts of prison behind him and
the new found ability to hold his
notes when singing live things are
finally looking as good for Ian
Brown as they have been for so
long for Mani.
‘Music Of The Spheres’ isn’t
classic Ian Brown but it is classic
Ian Brown. Ian Brown for those
that maybe didn’t like Ian Brown
before. Showing he isn’t washed
up and certainly not trailing the
current music scene. Ian Brown
is an innovator and one that will
be innovating for a while to come
yet.
8/10 TH
7/10
PC
PA G E 5
30TH OCTOBER 2001
Live...
A RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE?
As far as the selection from the
new album goes; one of the best
ones on there, ‘Out of Sight’, is
played followed by ‘On Fire’. Both
songs demonstrating the new
manner Jason has adapted when
writing lyrics, with much fewer
euphemisms about drugs meaning
love and love meaning drugs.
It was back off on the journey
through the back catalogue with a
superb version of ‘No God, Only
Religion’ followed by ‘Take Your
Time’ then ‘Let It Flow’, during
which one of Jason’s guitar strings
snapped. Of course he didn’t stop,
for him it was mind over matter and
it was all alright.
With another brief flirtation with
‘Let It Come Down’, the
melancholic ‘Won’t Get To Heaven
(The State I’m In)’ got a look in, as
did ‘Don’t Just Do Something’. And
with the last bit of feedback the
twelve men on stage filed off to
silent audience. It took the crowd
quite a long time to awake from the
collective transcendental state and
start cheering, whistling and
chanting for more.
The encore may actually have been
the most amazing twenty or so
minutes of my life. Once the band
had repositioned themselves and
Jason had taken the helm of the
good ship SS Skunk they launched in
to ‘Take Me To The Other Side’
which had a much more upbeat
style. The light show, up to that
point had been amazing colours and
patterns, turned in to full on strobe
lighting on the audience.This wasn’t
for thirty seconds or a minute, but
the entire duration of the song.
With the culmination of the song
came the culmination of the strobe
lighting. The strobe lights were
suddenly kicked up to a furious
pace and completely took me over.
I felt like I’d just had the most
intense hit of my life.
The onslaught continued apace
with the familiar bass drum beat of
‘Come Together’, as good in
Portsmouth as at the Royal Albert
Hall. And with that they were gone
and the stage fell dark. The crowd
were buzzing though and weren’t
going to leave so Jason and co. came
back to the stage for the final time
to play the unscheduled ‘Lord Can
You Here Me’, the closer to ‘Let It
Come Down’.
I left physically and emotionally
drained, quite stoned and with a
grin right across my face. If you do
but one thing in your life, go and see
Spiritualized live. Preferably at
Glastonbury. After smoking lots of
high grade skunk.
Paul Cornwell
The least he could have done was had a shave and cut his hair.
SPIRITUALIZED
Portsmouth
Pyramids
07/10/01
More so than any other band
Spiritualized fulfil themselves
in the live arena. The
grandiosity that is such a
Spiritualized trademark is
tenfold live and the everpresent wall of noise is
positively consuming. The
sound is wholly enveloping, but
it is the combination of the
music, the lights and the
presence of Jason Pierce that
turn a concert in to a religious
experience.
Spiritualized came on to a long and
droning intro, which eventually led
PA G E 6
in to ‘Cop Shoot Cop’. The tone of
the evening was set by this. Every
song that was played seemed to be
a half an hour epic that transported
your mind about a million miles
before returning it and starting all
over again with a different song.
The set was a bit of a surprise, a
greatest hits affair, with twice as
many songs from the back
catalogue as from ‘Let It Come
Down’. Maybe by chance but
probably not, the allocation of
songs from each album was quite
clinical; five songs from ‘Let It Come
Down’, four songs from ‘Ladies and
Gentlemen...’, three songs from
‘Pure Phase’, two songs from ‘Lazer
Guided Melodies’ and the real
shock and gem of the evening, a
superb version of Spacemen 3’s
Photos: Paul Cornwell
Jason going absolutely wild. Not.
‘Take Me To The Other Side’
‘Electricity’ followed ‘Cop Shoot
Cop’ and ‘Shine a Light’ followed
that. The audience all had baited
breath waiting to see if Jason would
say anything between any of the
songs. As usual he didn’t. What can
you expect though, from a man who
barely even opens his eyes to
acknowledge there’s even an
audience in front of him.
‘Born Never Asked’ and ‘Electric
Mainline’ come and go magnificently
before the first song from the
album they are currently supposed
to be promoting is played. This is
almost as if to prove Spiritualized
don’t have products, new albums
but just an undefinable expanse
filling presence, and they most
certainly don’t follow any rules.
30TH OCTOBER 2001
ELBOW
Student’s Union
October 10th
Jimmy Saville, David Beckham
and Sting. None of these
people are here to see Elbow
grace Southampton.The initial
signs of tonights gig are not
promising. One of Britain’s
most
precious
musical
commodities threaten to pass
as unappreciated as their stage
manner is unassuming. It’s
great potential threatens to be
ruined by pig-headed indie fans
and a shit venue. As the bloke
next to us put it: “Who the
fuck ARE these guys?”
The crowd are too proud to join in
with singer Guy Garvey’s open
banter and the atmospheric opener
‘Any Day Now’ falls largely on deaf
ears, as those not sure what they
were expecting try to make sense
of what they’re seeing. Along with
the uneven sound mix, by the time
four songs are over you’re still very
aware you’re stood in a food hall.
The funereal atmosphere is
suddenly transformed when the
stirring opening to the bands epic
Powder Blue bellows through the
speakers. Every nook and cranny of
the venue is filled by it’s sweeping
bitter-sweet tones, and we are all
suitably transfixed. The previously
impervious audience cheer the
band to the rooftops, realising they
are witnessing something special,
and no-one looks back. In fact some
members of the crowd have
become so enamoured with their
hosts that personal tragedy and the
pain of infedelity is aired and shared
in an impromptu counselling
session, the upshot of which is that
the sombre Coming Second is
renamed Robin is a Cocksucker to
rapturous applause. The band can
finally relax into their own songs,
charming their audience with the
simple yet cunning tactic of being
bloody good.
What’s evident tonight is that
Elbow are a band with depth,
subtlety, power and a sense of
humour, whether it be in the postska stomp of Coming
Second (aka Robin is a Cocksucker),
or the Mogwai-esqe sonic rock of
Can’t Stop, which kicks the shit out
of any mainstream British indie
band we can think of. Elbow
demand your attention. They’re like
musical cod liver oil- loosening the
Photo: Tim Houghton
Elbow
listening joints after years of under
use. As they close the
set with ‘Newborn’, Guy squeezes
in a quick plug reminding us that its
in the shops and that he’d really
appreciate it if we were to buy both
the CD and the vinyl version. We
will, and you should too. Oh go on.
They’d do the
same for you...
Sam Ferguson
Barney Sprague
GONG
The Brook
October 12th
Flying teapots , Radio Gnomes and
Zero the Hero. Thats right
Dearhearts,The Brook this evening
plays host the higher hippie cosmos
known as Planet Gong. As one
might expect there is a healthy
showing of hippies(young and
old),dreads and pot-head pixies to
view this evenings musical
shinanigans. Its been 25 years since
the classic"Flying Teapot" line up
and Steve Hillage has long since
glissed-off to other ventures.Are
Gong as eternal as they claim? Do
they have a place in todays musical
scheme of things? The answer is no.
They have never fitted in, thats what
makes them so wonderful.
So for the next 2 hours we will be
holding court with the No.1 cosmic
poet jester ,front man and guitarist
Daevid Allen. In true inmitable style
we witness his alter-egos as through
mad
costume
changes
he
transforms himself from Galactic
Jimmy Saville to Gurning Yoga-dude
to Pixie Presley.
This all happened right in front of
my eyes and I swear nothing
stronger than a J.D and Coke
passed my lips all evening- honest!
The evenings set comprised of what
everyone is hoping to
hear- selections from the "Flying
Teapot trilogy.We are not
dissapointed.Rousing in particular is
Larry Love of Alabama 3
the rendition of Oily Way and The
Glorious Om Riff would move the
most poe-faced Guru to cut the rug
on their prayer mat.This is
grade 'A' psychedelic music that
we're talking about here.
Didier Malharbe's sax solo with
French scat sing-a-long adlib could
have been cut shorter perhaps but
hey,my French is crap.What really
makes the show work is Gong's
ability to connect with their audi
ence.True ,The Brook's intimate
atmosphere helps and the fluro
back drops and drapes were
mind-bending.But as the lyrics say
"Fill your Tea cup up with tea, come
and take a ride with me." Well I did,
and for £10 it was probably the
cheapest astronautical excursion
ever.I look forward to the time!
Tim White
ALABAMA 3
The Brook
October 5th
I’ve converted to the church of
Alabama 3. The Brook was heaving
with a mixed crowd comprising ageing
rockers, barefoot hippies and teeny
ravers. The atmosphere was fantastic.
You may never have heard of Alabama
3, but you most probably have
encoutered their music (ie: Soprano’s
theme tune)- Describing them is no
easy task as they seem to encompass
all that is great about rock, country,
blues, hip-hop and techno (have I
missed anything? probably.) They take
to the stage clad in sharp suits, dark
sunglasses and cowboy hats, and
perform in an Al Green-esque
preacher fashion- They speak in scarily
convincing American accents, but
originate from Brixton.They are called
Rob and Jake but call themselves
Larry Love and the Reverend Dr D
Wayne Love. They were signed to
Geffen by the man who signed
Nirvana and Beck. Who are this
band? Well, judging by tonight, they’ve
got quite a following in Southampton.
Everyone knows the words to all the
songs, everyone is dancing, and a fair
number of people are also wearing
cowboy hats. On stage, the band
engage the crowd with their
presence, and the live experience is
one I won’t forget. The songs are
about alcohol, drugs and rehab, but
they are about hope. The message is
clear. If you need answers, you need
hope, you need salvation.You need to
go to church.The church of Alabama
3. Hmm...Well I arrived an atheist and
left a convertee to a godless church of
contradiction. If you ever get the
chance to see Alabama 3 live, do. But
in the meantime, get one of their
albums.
Emmanuelle Smith
PA G E
7
30TH OCTOBER 2001
Live...
SUPER FURRY
A N I M A L S
supported
by
Killa Kela,
Southampton
Guildhall
26/09/01
It is a shame that at a
time when the cities
premier music venue
is being threatened
with closure a big
enough
audience
doesn’t show up to
disprove the decision
makers.The audience,
though big, wasn’t at
capacity and you
could feel the slight
lack
of
crowd
atmosphere. Nobody
felt this lack of
enthusiasm
and
atmosphere
more
than support act Killa
Kela, human beat-box
and scratch pervert.
!
A
I
N
A
M
Y
R
R
U
F
PA G E 8
Killa Kela strolled out on to the
centre of the stage, introduced
himself, and was met with
bewilderment and indifference from
the audience. As he got in to the
swing of things though, the audience
gradually warmed to his impressive
display.The clear highlight of his set
was his cover of J Lo’s annoying
‘Play’. Apart from the fact that it
was good, it was almost identical.
He somehow managed to continue
the beat whilst imitating the vocals
in a truly breathtaking manner.
Rahzel might be the godfather of
noize but Killa Kela is the shining
protege and dare I say it? Even
better than the old timer.
As Killa Kela was coming close to
ending his set, live video of SFA
making their way to the stage came
up on the many screens around the
stage.This had the desired effect on
the crowd and they took their time
about getting to the stage, messing
around and having group huddles
along the way.
Whilst they were still making their
way to the stage their opening song
‘[A] Touch Sensitive’, an instrumental
slice of droning electronica began
playing.As they found their places on
the stage they joined in the song to
bolster it whilst the crowd went
nuts.They followed this rapidly with
‘Ice Hockey Hair’, Gruff Rhys
struggling to hold his notes for the
first couple of lines. He soon settled
down and his voice was as good as
ever.
It was only after this that Gruff
first spoke to the audience, in a
Russian accent “Good evening. We
are the Super Furry Animals”. For
the first night of the tour they
seemed very relaxed, but then they
had been down here for three days
prior to the show doing preuff had
been staying away from the wacky
backy whilst he was off the road.
Following that was an excellent
fantastic ‘The Man Don’t Give A
Fuck’ which was nearly drowned
out when the crowd sang the
chorus. This was followed by
another Welshy one ‘Gwreiddiau
Dwfn’, which was a bit of a shame
really as most of the stuff off of
‘Mwng’ is good but lacks that
trademark SFA insanity.
The insanity was quickly reinstated
as more crazy electonica started up
Photos: Paul Cornwell
30TH OCTOBER 2001
What followed was about
twenty minutes of good beaty
electronica, often verging on
drum ‘n’ bass...
version of ‘Play It Cool’ from 1997’s
‘Radiator’.
With every song that was played
a special video was played on the
many big screens, most of which
were the specially commissioned
videos for each track on the DVD
version of ‘Rings Around The
World’. ‘Receptacle For The
Respectable’ was next and during
the dirty hardcore wig out at the
end, the band, (bar the chief knob
twiddler), left the stage. They
resumed their posts before the end
of the song and launched quickly in
to ‘No Sympathy’.
The evening continued in the same
vain with SFA mixing up the classics
from their previous albums with the
classics from the new one.
‘Demons’, ‘It’s Not The End Of The
World’, ‘Nythod Cacwn’ and
‘Presidential Suite’ were all knocked
and Gruff walked to the front of the
stage and swung a large
multicoloured piece of plastic pipe
around nearly hitting your intrepid
reporter many times.The band then
left the stage (bar Gruff, who
follows shortly behind, and the
guitarist/knob twiddler.) What
followed was about twenty minutes
of good beaty electronica, often
verging on drum ‘n’ bass. It all
revolved around just a repeated few
bars of beats with an excerpt from
‘Total Recall’ of Arnie saying “Best
Mind
Fuck
Yet”
repeated
incessantly.
The most interesting and
unbelievable thing occurred at the
end of this.The lights came up.That
was it. There was no encore. You
can always rely on SFA to break
with convention and surprise you.
A slight departure for SFA, though
I’m not sure if I’ve ever
witnessed such a full blown,
visceral and body shaking
show in my life.
out with Gruff sitting with his crazy
acoustic guitar. “I’m going to carry
on sitting down. I’m quite comfy”
said Gruff in his inimitable Welsh
accent before launching in to the
truly superb ‘Run Christian Run’.
This was supported by some pretty
evocative video that was well and
truly, (but not unfounded), Christian
baiting material.We even found out
that making fun of bald people was
punishable by death in the Bible.You
learn something new everyday.
Next followed the sing-along of
‘Fire In My Heart’, ‘Northern Lites’
and the recent single ‘Juxtaposed
With U’_ “Now we’re going to rock
your world”_ Gruff tried to sound
convincing but he couldn’t.
However they do rock the audience
with ‘Do Or Die’ and a surprising ly
ferocious mosh develops.
The penultimate song was the
you can see the seeds as far back as
‘Guerilla’, those twenty minutes
could have been slid in to a Paradox
night without anyone noticing.Truly,
all of the best bands are doing the
electronica and beats in traditional
indie ground thing these days;
Primal Scream started it, SFA
followed suit and The Charlatans
have even had a stab at it on the
latest album. And they’ve all done it
fucking well.These three truly are at
the cutting edge of British music
and SFA are deserved to be up
there.
The truly amazing thing is all of this
was achieved whilst managing to
keep the sing-alongs, for they truly
are odd bedfellows. Brilliant.
Paul CornwelL
PA G E 9
30TH OCTOBER 2001
MYNCI
BUSINESS
Interview...
So, seven albums in and
Can Megan? Yes she can...
PA G E 1 0
Photo: Emmanuelle Smith
Gorky’s are still going
strong. They’re one of
those rare bands that last
and last without having
to either drastically
change
directions
a
million times (a la Blur)
or rehash the same stuff.
Which is why they
remain such a fabulous
experience
live.
Portsmouth was the
third time I’d seen them
and no disappointment.
The crowd was very
young (I felt like an old
lady!!) and comprised
mainly SFA fans and local
indie kiddies. How sweet!
One girl I met was seeing
Gorky’s 3 times on that
tour, and SFA about 4.
She’d also got Euros and
the rest of the band to
sign her special pair of
jeans in the bar prior to
the gig. Guess how old
she was? Well, actually I
don’t know, but she’d
graduated and had a real
job
and
everything.
Which just goes to show
that
once
a
mad
obsessive groupie, always
a mad obsessive groupie.
Anyway, I’ll get back to the point.
The gig was great- a good mix of
old classics and tracks off the new
How I long to Feel that Summer LP.
Except I had to leave early to catch
the last train and I missed the
encores, which I was quite pissed
off about. When I spoke to Megan
briefly over the phone a couple of
weeks later, she told me all about
the tour, the new album etc...
How does this album differ
from your previous ones, and
specifically Spanish Dance
Troupe?
Megan Childs: Well, it didn’t
differ in the way we recorded it,
obviously, because it’s just the usual
studio format. But it did have a
completely different approach.
Rather than just putting songs, like
individual songs and putting them
on a record, it was more of a whole
album. From the beginning, we knew
what songs would go well together,
as opposed to what songs where
really good and that we thought we
should record. I think it fits
together better as an album than
anything else we’ve ever done -a
part from maybe Blue Trees but that
was a mini-album so it was meant
to fit togetherAnd has the song writing
process changed/evolved since
your beginnings?
MC: Well, I don’t think it’s changed
that much to be honest. I think it’s
just been a case of whoever writes
the song usually writes it at home,
on their own with a guitar or a
was me, Euros and Rich in my house
and I was playing guitar really badly,
and kind of wrote it on the guitar.
But I can’t actually play guitar- But I
just thought, sod it, there’s the song,
and I’ve finished it, and there’s no
point worrying about whether it’s
good or badHow do you think the UK
music scene has changed since
the demise of Britpop?
MC: Well, I wouldn’t say that the
whole music scene has changed, but
I’d say that people’s whole attitude
to music has. Maybe people are
more open now. It’s not like you
have to be into one type of music.
Well, obviously if you’re into NuMetal you can just listen to that and
be obsessive about that but I think
For years and years we were
seen as a “new band”and
suddenly, we’re being
respected as a band that’s
been around for a long time
piano or with one other person.
And then we kind of bring it to the
band and everyone kind of starts
playing what they do. I think it’s
been like that for ever to be honest.
Well, some songs we do jam out
and do instrumentals and stuff and
we make songs to perform live. Like
when you’re rehearsing, and playing
together, and something’s come out
of that.
Do you all have equal input in
the band?
MC: Errm...Well... I think we all
have equal input in terms of the
instruments that we play. It’s not
like, the one person saying “I want
this song to sound like this”Although obviously the person
who’s written the song has got
more of an idea in their heads of
what it should sound like. But when
it comes to individual instruments
and ideas, we all have input.
On the new album, there’s a
song called Can Megan?
written by you- What’s with
the title? And can you?
MC: Well, I wrote that song and
didn’t have a title for it through
months and months of recording
and finally I was just like- “Right,
that’s the title and it’ll be known as
that.” It was actually written when it
that there are a lot of people who
enjoy lots of different types of
music. Which is good for us in a
way, because we don’t really fit into
anywhere. It’s no longer just young
people, or just boys, or just girls, it’s
everyone that can like any type of
music. In a way, Britpop was a really
bad thing for musicHow do you think your own
role as a band has changed, if at
all, within the UK music scene?
MC: I think maybe our place has
changed. I mean for years and years
we were seen as a “new band”,
which was kind of strange, because
we’d been going on for about 4 or 5
years. And suddenly, we’re being
respected as a band that’s been
around for a long time (which we
have), without
being
seen
necessarily as an old band.
Is touring with your brother
Euros difficult?
MC: No, not really- It’s been so
long that I don’t think I know what
it’s like touring without my brother.
Also, there are enough of us touring
so that it’s more like a group of
friends who all get on.
Isn’t that lovely?
Emmanuelle Smith
30TH OCTOBER 2001
dance
PaRaDISE CLUB
The departure from ClubM at the
end of last year would seem less a
demise from power but the next
step in the squeeze 18 master plan.
Having headhunted some of the
uni’s finest, Squeeze have now set
up home at The Paradise Club.
the new Squeeze venue ensures
that it’s all about going out in your
best. And what’s more the music,
spread between two rooms, is sure
to butter both sides.
Thursday saw the grandest of
openings with Ray Kieth as well
as resident Defikew.
tbone
Friday night then handed the club
over to RnB and Garage. DJ Flash
kicked off with some millennial
rhythm and blues- Usher, Destinys
Child, Nelly, Ja Rule, Mace, Dre and
the likes. T-Bone completed the
night as he mixed (!!- notoriously
uncommon in these parts) a choice
selection of tracks. The honeyz,
male and female, were drawn onto
the floor to flex their practised
moves and with “Murder she
wrote” each and all got on down.
“ClubParadise”- suddenly there’s
images of slightly less than
Scott Garcia took to the decks
across the landing and blasted the
two step from the impressive
stacks. Mcs Fize and a mysterious
female talent provided some fiesty
punctuation.With the sounds of
Saturday finished the first weekend
with a notable blast. Rat Pack
reappeared on the Squeeze bill to
fill the capacity crowd with all their
splendour. Hands went “up in the
air” as the ravers did what they
always did best. The anthems were
all there and the acid infusions
illuminated the smiley faces. The
reminiscent heating was right up
and the old skool tore through the
new.
ratpackers
And if all that got a bit much, a
quota was set aside for the
electrofunktypebreaks of Al (or as
some might prefer “Big Vern”) and
Tom Smelly. Pure party music
was of the essence and the soulful
overspill gave perfect reason to
cha-cha-cha across the floor.
“Apache” was in the bag along with
various other perfectly reworked
classics.
Without printing an ode to
Squeeze18, they are rarely
mistaken. So the risk factor is not
always
apparent
but
their
consistency certainly works over
the treacherous Solential terrain.
flash
smelly n al
go-on girl..
attractive women straining to
conceal the marks of divorce while
the men set about making
impression with their mullets of
yesteryear.
Do not be put off,
the paradise name is something of a
tradition and any such imagery is
safely left at the door. The Paradise
Club is a goodlooking club. Were
not talking Capital chic but it’s
certainly stylised in ways that you
might not expect in Southampton.
As fresh as the paint on the walls,
“dirty water” and Usher’s “Pop
your Collar” the crowd were
rightly underway. Now that does
raise an intersting point- the truly
special garage crowd, with a neat
dispersion of mock G-stars and
their scantily clad counterparts.
Quite whether it be “issit” or
“innit”, I’m not entirely sure!?.That
aside the vibe was more than
pleasant.
The futures bright
The futures, for a nice part
at least,
Squeeze 18.
And some student type advice;
while the drinks might be a little
more than cheap, it really is a small
price to pay for the pleasure. The
utility derived will regurgitate all
over that consumed (regurgitation
in a literal sense for some of
youcrazy folks!?)
a couple of laydees
Forthcoming Squeeze events
include Goldie, Scratch Pervert,
Reprazent Crew, Ez Rollers,
AdamF, Freestylers and a whole lot
more.........
Pen
Dra
gon
Pendragon was established
way back 1991 in the
summer they all called love.
Rather accordingly breath
was given to the tribal
Celtic spirit that embodies
the Pendragon sound. The
tech trance wizardry lends a
purely
original
CEEarthdance vibe and has
fuelled parties ever since. If
you fancy dancing amid a
certain air of mystic head on
up to parties at The Fridge
or Brixton Academy. Or else
wait for the forthcoming
album with Millennium
Records, featuring tracks
from
Signum,
Digital
Science, Nuw Idolannsuch
likes,
this
coming
December.
charlotte devalda
PA G E
11
30TH OCTOBER 2001
dance
Paradox
‘Unique Drum N Bass
Spectacular’
- the promise for Paradox,
Guildhall,
Friday
12th
November.
With an artist line up of Hype,
Andy C, Optical and Bad
Boy Company it does appear
that the South coast may finally
be able to present us with
... .. n i t e
flight
It is the absence of regular events
that makes the odd ones seem
worthwhile. What is impressive
however is the now regular
occurrence of ‘Nite Flight,’ at the
Rhino every Monday. To make a
success of a drum n bass night on
a weekday is admittedly hard
work. It has to be said, this will
exceed all expectations. There is
garage and breakz downstairs, but
the main drum n bass room is the
highlight. Kicking off the event on
8th October was none other than
Shabba D, the place was
absolutely heaving. Variation is
the key, certain to be a success
there is an old skool nite on the
5th November with Skibadee and
a Jungle night on 29th October.
Promoted by DJ Karlito and Mc
Trax this fresh new arrival at the
Rhino will be sure to set you up
nicely for the rest of the week.
Check it!
Satwant Phander
something other than cheese.
The new academic year in
Southampton has seen a surge in
new promoters and events,
offering something more than the
commercial. Even NY2 (formally
knows as New Yorks) and
possibly one of the cheesiest
clubs around has been invaded by
guest DJ’s every Friday night.
Venue however in Southampton
is a great problem; the Guildhall
probably most suited for this
event was not an ideal. The
feeling of being in a school hall,
with teachers and parents
observing at the back does not
exactly make you feel at ease,
while you down whatever is on
the menu for you that evening.
albums
APHEX TWIN
Drukgs
(Warp)
“C’MON YOU CUNT LETS HAVE
SOME APHEX ACID”, screams a
psyched up voice in the middle of
‘cock/ver10’, before the hammering
beats return full force. A childish
display of a large ego that is well
deserved.
Not for nothing has Richard D.
James been fondling at the strings of
electronix since his early teenhood. The early nineties saw James
garner huge respect from any music
journalists who managed to sit
through the entirety of his double
CD “Selected Ambient Works Vol
2”, and a rebuttal of bewilderment
from those who couldn’t.
Since 1997’s ear shattering “Come
to Daddy” there’s been a distinct
lull in output from Cornwall’s finest,
broken only by the Windowlicker
single (y’know, the one with Aphex’s
grinning head cut’n’pasted onto the
bikini clad girls) and rumours of
retirement. So what’s been going
on? Well,
the
information
surrounding this release is equally
obscure as the track titles
themselves, which include such
keyboard scrambling delights as
‘jynweythek’ and ‘beskhu3epnm’,
and it’s just as likely that Mr. James
has been sunning himself on a beach
in the Caribbean for the last four
years as it is that he’s been holed up
in his bedroom creating ‘Drukqs’.
Indeed the mythical quantities of
unreleased Aphex material could
easily
support
the
former
proposition, as could the similarity
of tracks such as ‘Mt St Michel + St
Michaels
Mount’
(sic)
and
‘vordhosbn’ to his earlier work.
In all likelihood though, the biggest
change in the James household has
been the addition of a piano. The
sleeve features just such an
instrument
(appropriately
photographed from the inside).
Also, short interludes of gentle
unaccompanied melody proliferate
through the album, lending a feeling
of emotion to a field which can all
too often produce ascetic dros.
In all fairness, not one track stands
out as a massive stylistic leap, which
may make long term fans feel as if
they’ve heard it all before. Where
the album really wins out, though, is
in the combination of tracks which
present every facet of a genre
which Aphex practically invented.
4/5 TH
Loads of cds.Tonnes of going out. Chillin with the stars.
And all as a Very Very IP from theEdge.
Cant be bad eh!?
If you wanna get involved with this supremely esteemed publication email
cd497@soton.ac.uk.
PA G E 1 2
@ guildhall
To be fair though the promise was
there and almost fulfilled. There
was no doubt that Andy C was
the man on the night.
The crowd was kept in frenzy
with some tantalizing beats, drops
and explosive bass.
the live dancers, always a source
of entertainment.
The night certainly was a
success, it was hard not to keep
on your feet, and keep others off
them.
Satwant Phander
The atmosphere was there, the
sound was certainly kicking and
NICKY BLACKMARKET
Rollin’ - Best Of Drum & Bass
- Vol. 3
(Azuli)
Paul Van Dyke
The Politics of Dancing
(ministry of sound)
Booooooom.This compilation is a
fat chunk of some of the best
drum ‘n’ bass around at the
moment. The mix is diverse with
some of the more well-known
artists lying side by side with some
real fresh underground talent. The
opening track, Bad Company’s
‘Dogs On The Moon’, sets the
tone and from there it just gets
smuttier. Other famous names
cropping up to do their thang are
Ray Keith, Shimon, Die, J Majik,
Swift, Brockie and Kenny Ken, a
motley crew to be sure.
The first compilation album from
Paul Van Dyke in eight years will,for
trance fans, have been well worth
the wait. Paul’s theory that ‘Djing is
about interaction with the
audience,’ is evident in this double
CD which endeavours to recreate
that intimate relationship and
atmosphere between DJ and
crowd. The first CD blends and
styles through a mixture of techno,
trance, house, funk and latino. The
style is progressive, slowly going up
in pace from mix to mix. The
mixing is spotless, skilful and
adventurous, although there is
sometimes the feeling it doesn’t go
far enough. The selection of tracks
is interesting, notably the unique
reworking of U2s Elevation. After
some fat baselines, catchy break
beat loops the CD nicely winds
down to more trancy tracks.
Compiled and mixed by long time
D&B master Nicky Blackmarket,
who is in town with the Squeeze
18 posse on November 30th, it
goes without saying that every mix
is seamless and oh so good.
First listen and tracks start to
jump out at you as ones that have
started to be dropped recently at
all of the best D&B nights. Most
shining example of this is the
fantastic latino jazz groove,
underpinned with filthy beats, that
is Shy FX feat. Nia with ‘Shake Ur
Body’. The feeling you’re left with
after a listen is best summed up by
the man himself “The Drum and
bass scene is very healthy at the
moment, just constantly going
from strength to strength.”
4/5 PC
Disc 2, more pacy than the first,
erupts industrial sounds, coupled
with harmonic breakdowns. The
vibe is techno, funky, filtered with
fabulous synths. The mixing from
track into track, especially Way Out
West’s Activity into ConectorInterference presents Paul as
nothing other than a perfectionist.
The entwining of melodic tracks
with breaky beats is refreshing,
although sometimes does become
a bit laborious. Followers of this
type of music will find this
compilation no disappointment and
well worth investing in.
4/5 SP
30TH OCTOBER 2001
dance
Lamb
What Sound
(Mercury Records)
Every album takes its listener on a
journey and
Lamb’s eagerly
anticipated release has arrived to
do just that. This eclectic selection
of sound, expounding the theme of
love, is a flight that encompasses the
chasmy depths of loneliness and the
realms of choral angelolatry. Andy
Barlow and Louise Rhodes’ latest
work leads them from the watery
‘What Sound’, dominated by
Louise’s vocals, with strings and
syncopated rhythm arranged by Wil
Malone (who worked on Massive
Attack) is an unusual combination
of samples and Trippy K beatbox
experimentation, followed by the
sprinkling echoes and bullets of
sound found in ‘Written’.
‘Gabriel’ is a beautiful track, also
found on the CafÈ del Mar
Volumen Ocho, the height of
vocal seraphic adoration with its
fantastic blend of orchestral
strings
and
cadenced
instrumentals. The journey draws
to a close with the punchy, bass
infused ‘Sweetheart’,
and
concludes with the highs and lows
of ‘Just Is’, as the post trip fatigue
is soothed by a secret piano
lullaby that is not to be missed.
4/5 RL
RAE AND CHRISTIAN
Another Late Night
(Azuli)
You know those parties, after
parties, you’ve been at an event and
it seems that everyone is going back
to Jim’s, or Angus’ or somewhere,
so you go. Well for those of us
without in house DJ’s Mark Rae and
Steve Christian have done us a
favour. Yes, a mix CD, another one,
based around the idea that, well, it’s
late at night I suppose.
And it’s pretty good, starts out as
all late night Hip-Hop Dj’s might,
with some cool and funky beats,
smart FX and decent samples, but
then, like a DJ at a party it gets all
distracted by some dirty breaks.
The transition is smooth enough,
but you’ve got to ask, why bother?
singles
Adam F
Stand Clear
(EMI)
The collaboration between Adam F
and MOP, resulting in ‘Stand Clear,’
presents some high quality hip-hop.
The track immediately creates a
good vibe with an inviting
background beat, impossible not to
appreciate. Combined with the
notable lyrical ability of MOP
there’s no way it wasn’t going to
work. Despite its hip-hop label, the
instrumental intrusions, entwined
with the beat will make this one
widely popular.
4/5
SP
Usher
U got it Bad
(Arista)
No matter how much you think
you’ve heard of Usher and his
soulful sorrows, he still manages to
touch the spot. ‘U Got it Bad’ is
another tearjerker to make you
dwell on the lamity of your love
life... even if it’s great! The track has
a good tune and Ushers vocal ability
is what makes it even better. Usher
fans will love it, as will anybody who
enjoys RnB. A good quality track,
but very much what is expected of
Usher and nothing out of the
extraordinary.
3/5
SP
P. Diddy
Bad Boy For Life
(Bad Boy Entertainment)
First thing to do is overlook the
ridiculous name change...Puff
Daddy/P Diddy, whatever went
wrong there is rectified by the
track. ‘Bad Boy for Life,’ (which
seemilngly he is), is no let down to
the Bad Boy Entertainment label.
Essentially very simple in its soundits catchy, easily absorbed and will
have you tapping. Interestingly P
Diddy does not do much solo,
leaving the rapping to Black Rob
and Mark Curry, but it is his
presence and notoriety that will
make this work...No matter what
the Diddy he’s calling himself!
4/5
SP
Jay Z
IZZO (H.O.V.A)
(Rock-a-fella/
Records)
PPK
This track is going to be big.
Relatively unheard of, PPK
impressed Paul Oakenfold enough
with ‘Resurrection,’ to get an
immediate signing to his record
label. The track commemorates
man’s first trip into space. The
atmospheric harmonies, mild tempo
beats with mystical sounds and
vocals launch you into orbit. Not
typically trance is what will make
this universally likable, appealing to
anyone with a sense of the
harmonious.
4/5 SP
Mercury
Jay Z seems to have established
himself as a pop-hip-hop artist. This
track and like many of his others
has a pop vibe, yet his lyrics and
ability to deliver them results in a
very unique sound. Collaborations
with female vocalists and gifted
rappers normally work, and this is
no exception. The tune will keep
your attention, if not so more to
know what the hell IZZO
(H.O.V.A) stands for. Its not
astounding and Jay Z, although
talented and unique as an individual,
needs to do something different to
make a true impact.
3/5
SP
Resurrection
(Perfecto)
BLACK LODGE
The Horse with no Name
(Mo’Wax)
This limited edition 12” is Black
Lodge’ s first release on Mo’Waxand boy is it good. Since DJ
Shadow and UNKLE, Mo’Wax
haven’t ceased to dissapoint (and
yes, I am thinking South) However,
Black Lodge are a credit to the
label, and a much needed reminder
of how good it can be. OK, so now
how do I describe it? Well, side A
is full of phat beats and pumping
rythms in a loop, and the flip is...
Well, the flip is just out of this
world. Black Lodge have found
some fantastic/hilarous samples
and extracts of people talking from
somewhere and somehow turned
them into a “tune”- This record
would get everyone laughing, if not
dancing.
5/5
ES
You’d expect cut after cut of hiphopping, but hey it’s there mix, not
mine and it is competently done
with scratching and everything.
It does get somewhat, how do you
say? Housey, just a bit, near the end,
and that’s fine. I just couldn’t help
wondering if the Mancunian Duo
had catered to the series a little bit.
Perhaps there technical wizardry
would be put to better use on a DJKicks release, or maybe even a new
album (gosh). As with many DJ
compilations this one ends with an
“old timey classic”, Jose Feliciano’s
accapella of California Dreamin’.
The sleeve notes claim that this is
“wistful” I thought it was just plain
great. If you don’t have a DJ mix, and
want one, this one is among the
better releases.
4/5 AU
FLANGER
Inner Space / Outer Space
(NTone)
When Miles Davis went electric
back in the day, he spawned a
whole legion of fusioneers
ranging from the dire to the outof-this-world. This is fusion
updated for the new millennium
and is most definitely from the
interstellar school. An array of
pre-programmed grooves is
enhanced by a host of live players
Chilean percussionists Claudio
Ortuzar and Ernesto Artunez
experimental Cologne guitarist
Josef Suchy. Inner Space/Outer
Space marks a definite return to
form for the Flanger duo Burnt
Friedman and Atom Heart
4/5 TH 8/10
CLOTHESHOW
7-12 DECEMBER BIRMINGHAM NEC
IN ASSOCIATON WITH
THE BRITISH HEART FOUNDATION
December 7th sees the Clotheshow descend once again on Bmx’s
NEC. There’s four whole days to get your provisions for this season
and next, and all at totally bargainous prices. While any true shopgirl
would need little more incentive, the event is set to spark an
impressive fusion of fashion, music and dance. Galaxy FM have rather
kindly offered to soundtrack the experience alongside live bands and
various Djs- inc.The Dreem Team. Radio 1 have also set a Dj challenge
with the winner taking home a shiny set of Technics as well as a years
Dj-ing contract!!
For the Uni’s very own fashionites stationed out in Winchester, the
search is on for the British Heart Foundation’s Young Designer of the
year. See www.clotheshow2001.com for further details but a
placement with a highly esteemed designer could have your career off
to the finest of starts!
The very beautiful people at the Clotheshow have given us 3 pairs of
tickets to give away. Email cjdevalda@hotmail.com with the answer to
the following question, first three win:
Who was crowned Queen of the catwalk, in a Ben De Lisi number, at
last years Clotheshow?
a) Kylie Minogue
b) Victoria Beckham
c) Patsy Kensit
best of british and hope to catch you checking the Portobello chic
some time between the 7th and 12th......
PA G E 1 3
30TH OCTOBER 2001
FILM
mental illness, and a beautiful film.
Paul does not fall into either the alltoo-familiar category of “genius
gone wrong” (think Pi) or that of a
whingeing overly self-conscious
individual. His illness is real and so is
the pain it causes his family. Truly
brilliant. Oh, and the soundtrack
features Sigur Ros. Bonus.
Emmanuelle Smith
ANGELS OF THE UNIVERSE
Director: Fridrik Thor Fridriksson
Starring: Ingvar Eggert Sigurosson,
Baltasar Kormakur, Theodor Juliusson,
Margret Helga Johannsdottir
Hailed as the best film to come
from Iceland ever, Angels of the
Universe is often compared to One
Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. By
now you’re probably thinking “Oh
God not again” and visions of Virgin
Suicides, Girl, Interrupted et al. are
probably flashing through your
mind. Well, perhaps it has all been
done before but it’s certainly never
been done like this. The
scriptwriter,
Einar
Mar
Gudmundsson, has adapted his own
book and tells the true story of his
own brother, which makes it all the
more harrowing.
Paul (or Pall), the main character,
lives in a house with his parents and
siblings in what is seemingly a
pleasant suburban area. He loves
music -spending most of his time
playing drums in his room- and also
dreams of becoming a painter.
Despite this, he does in no way
come across as a pretentious
tormented artist type, but rather as
a “normal” twentysomething man.
In the beginning of the film, he
courts a girl from the Icelandic
upper-middle classes (against the
advice of his down-to-earth friends)
and inevitably ends up getting hurt
and feeling rejected. Which, to
quote probably no-one, is where it
all starts. Paul starts complaining of
“pains in the heart”, and his
behaviour progressively becomes
more erratic. Finally, his parents
have no choice other than to admit
him into the local psychiatric
“hospital” There, he meets a group
of what might be described as a
more “typical” group of movie
nutcases- a guy who thinks he’s
Hitler, one who thinks he wrote all
of the Beatles songs etc... This
episode -though amusing- does not
take away from the fact that the film
is a serious, honest portrayal of
PA G E 1 4
Battle
Royale
Director: Kinji
Fukasaku
Starring:
T a t s u a
Fujiwara, Taro
Yamamoto
In the not too distant
future Japans economy will falter
and unemployment will rise. The
kids will run riot, boycott classes
and stab their teachers. And there
will be a public outcry demanding
that something be done about it.
As a result, the government will
introduce the brutal Millenial
Reform School Act, AKA “Battle
Royale”, where a random class is
chosen to annually fight to the
death on a small-uninhabited
offshore island over the course of
three days. Or at least, that’s the
premise of renowned Japanese
director Kinji Fukasaku’s latest
movie.
Unfortunately, as members of the
audience very little else is
revealed to us as to the whys and
wherefores of this slightly
ridiculous movie. A class of forty
middle school students are
chosen for this year’s event, that
much we know. Given a weapon
each (ranging from a machine gun
to a saucepan lid) the children are
ordered to run off into the
wilderness and kill each other, and
dutifully do so, mainly because of
the metal necklaces they’re forced
to wear, which explode if they
don’t. Beyond this the narrative
has a variety of short comings, not
least the lack of explanation as to
the motives of Kitano (played by
Japanese cinematic icon Takeshi
Kitano), the school children’s
former teacher who acts as
referee
with
inexplicable
enthusiasm.
Over the course of innumerable
bloody killings the film focuses in
on three characters in particular.
Shuya (Tatsua Fujiwara) and his
soon-to-be soul mate Noriko
(Taro Yamamoto) are the central
couple, two shy and retiring types
forced unwillingly into the
massacre and who opt for an
ultra-defensive approach. The
third character is “transfer”
student Kawada, apparently a
previous winner of Battle Royale.
Together, these three desperately
search for a way to negate the
killing.
Despite narrative drawbacks the
film does create a number of
interesting scenes in which
classmates battle to come to
terms with their lot. One example
is the group of girls who manage
to stick together for two of the
three
days
before
being
overwhelmed by suspicion of one
another and descending into the
messiest of bloodbaths.Another is
the young Japanese boy who,
having accepted his fate, risks his
life (and ultimately loses it) in the
quest for losing his virginity.These
moments are few and far between
however, and are completely
masked
by
the
complete
incoherence of the plot.
As someone remarked to me on
the way out of the cinema, it’s a
film that wouldn’t be completely
out of place on the late night
Channel 5 listings.
Tim Houghton
LOCAL CINEMAS
Harbour Lights Picture
House
Ocean Village
Southampton S014
Film Info: 023 80234234
Booking Line: 023 80234234
The Phoenix (films every
Wednesday at Boldrewood)
Film Info: whw@soton.ac.uk
UGC
4 Ocean Way
Ocean Village
Southampton S014
Tel: 0870555132
The Odeon
Leisure World
Southampton S015
Tel: 08705050007
The Boys hang out at Portswood Market
AMERICAN PIE 2
Director: James B Rogers
Starring: Sean Willam Scott, Alyson
Hannigan, Eugene Levy.
American Pie 2 was perhaps
inevitable. Its predecessor was
such a success that Universal
would have been mad not to
make a follow-up. The real
success here is that they’ve
managed to keep the spirit of
the first film intact, making a
sweet romance wrapped in
some outstanding comedic set
pieces.
In American Pie, our four heroes Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas), Oz
(Chris Klein), Jim (Jason Biggs), and
Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas) - tried to
lose their virginities before they
Jim’s Dad (Eugene Levy), who
provided some of the funniest
moments in the first film. His subtle
performance as a father who
desperately wants to seem cool is
one of the most rewarding parts of
the film. It is the flute-toting
Michelle, though, who provides the
film’s heart, through her awkward
friendship with Jim. Nadia (Shannon
Elizabeth), the foreign exchange
student who is still inexplicably
attracted to Jim, is coming to visit.
As Michelle is the only person who
he has ever had sex with, the
sexually inept Jim turns to her for
help - cue blossoming romance.
Meanwhile
previously
major
characters, such as Oz and Heather
(Mena Suvari), find their roles
One year later, and our heroes have not
moved on. Jim has been unable to add
another notch on his bedpost since
Michelle, and Kevin still pines for Vicki.
graduated from high school. A novel
idea in itself- for a Hollywood movie
to admit that four normal highschool seniors could still be virgins.
It was this story, and the conclusions
it reached, which made the film so
good, and it was the gross-out
comedy moments which made it so
popular. One year later, and our
heroes have not moved on. Jim has
been unable to add another notch
on his bedpost since his one-night
stand with Michelle (Alyson
Hannigan). Kevin still pines for his
lost love Vicki (Tara Reid). Finch is
still obsessed with Stiffler’s mom. So
they decide to rent a summer house
on the lake and forget about their
troubles and their woes. If American
Pie was about the loss of childhood,
then its sequel is about actually
growing up. As expected, some of
the more beloved minor characters
are given beefed up roles
in AP2, in particular Stiffler (Sean
William Scott) and Michelle, but also
diminished. These two are given so
little to do, you wonder why they
were even included.
Without Jim and Michelle, the film
would have had to survive on its
jokes alone. This would be a bad
thing, for if AP2 shares its
predecessor’s virtues, it also shares
its flaws. While some set pieces
really hit the mark (in the first film
the pie scene springs to mind, in this
one, the superglue scene), others can
really drag. If you don’t find a scene
funny, you just have to grin and bear
it until it’s finally over.
A hit-and-miss comedy, the hits
thankfully outnumber the misses by
a long way.
American Pie 2 is probably not quite
as good as the original, but
compared to the flood of wannabe
teen comedies which have arisen
over the past year, it is a
masterpiece.
Nimalan Thanigasapapathy
Gourami... a holiday it’s not!
Gourami, a fictional island in the East Indian Ocean,
is the setting for Shell’s interactive business challenge.
As part of an international project team you will be tasked with
developing and presenting a 5-year business strategy to senior
Shell leaders. The issues are complex and the deadlines
demanding. You’ll learn a lot, and you’ll learn fast.
Welcome to Gourami.
This is your chance to discover first hand what the energy business
is all about and to see how you would cope at the sharp end of an
international organisation.
It’s no holiday, but it could be the break of a lifetime.
Courses: 3-8 and 8-13 January 2002
Location: Marbella, Spain
Closing date for applications: 19 November 2001
Applications are welcome from final year students of
all disciplines. For more information please visit our
website or contact response@si.shell.com
Thinking about a better future?
www.shell.com/careers
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 33
Wessexscene.co.uk
A Bubble
Bath
I’M having a chat with Bubble
from Big Brother on the stairs! I
tell him again and again that
he’s so short, much shorter than
on TV- not the greatest start! He
seems amazing normal- but as
he points out he is!
Since Big Brother 2 he has been
doing
loads
of
personal
appearances. He is friends with all
the BB2 gang but one, yes Paul
and Helen are actually together,
Dean’s not really dull, it is the
editing.... I’m trying desperately to
be vaguely original but my mind is
blank!
Bubble seems like he’s churning
out the answers before I ask the
questions! Apparently I’m not
being cut throat enough!
Has it been worthwhile?
If I can buy my little girl a car and
send her to university then the
answer is yes.
He is very disillusioned by the
media (unsurprisingly!) Yes he
thought his life would change by
going into the BB2 house but he
thought that he would go back to
normality.
single with Amma- I ask if he can
sing! - he asks if I ever watched
BB2!
Rumours like to quash?
I’m Single and I’m not releasing a
www.allaboutbubble.com
Send your captions too.....
captions@wessexscene.co.uk
Wessexscene.co.uk
PAGE 34
Name:Emma Brice Age: 20
Area from: High Wycombe
Degre: Sports science
Traffic light status: Green
View of Southampton so far:
Fantastic
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Academ, 6/10
Best thing so far?
Drinking
Worst thing so far?
9am induction lecture
Name: Sach Warah
Age:19
Area from:Slough
Degree: Electrical
engineering
Traffic
light
status:Green
View
of
Southampton so far
Enjoying it loads, people are so
friendly, strangers speak to you in
the supermarket
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Glen Bar, New York’s, Jester’s,
8/10
Best thing so far?
My new room
Worst thing so far?
Passing out on the first night!
Name: Martin Latham Age: 19
Area from:Oxfordshire
Degree: Mechanical engineering
Traffic light status: Red
View of Southampton so far
Excellent
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Glen bar then the union, 7/10
Best thing so far?
Meeting people
Worst thing so
far?
I have too much
stuff for my room,
my
windsurfing
board won’t fit
Name:Anusha
Leathard, Age:18
Area From:Richmond, London
Degree:Law
Traffic light status
Red
View of Southampton so far
I’m having a great time, people are
really friendly.
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Academy 7/10
Best thing so far
Getting to know everyone
Worst thing so far
Losing my voice.
Name: Jess Hartsilver, Age: 20
Area from: Surrey
Degree: Nursing
Traffic light status:Red
View of Southampton so far
Better than the first time, I’m
starting another degree.
First night out where and rating
of the night out of ten (ten being
high)
Boiler room- Monty hall bar,
10/10
Best thing so far?
Meeting the girls in
my flat
Worst thing so far?
Queuing for
everything
Name: Roger gill
Age:18
Area from:Swansea
Degree: Philosophy
and sociology
Traffic light
status:Green
View of Southampton so far
Nice so far, although not been
into the city yet
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Union bar then jesters, 8/10
Best thing so far?
The drink
Worst thing so far?
Walking around not knowing
where to go.
SCENE
WESSEX
Name: Thorwald Petersen Age 22
Area from:Frankfurt, Germany
Degree: Management science
Traffic light status: Yellow
View of Southampton so far
Great, the University is not as
concrete as the one in Frankfurt.
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
Boiler House, Monty Hall bar, 9/10
Best thing so far?
Uni link pass arriving
Worst thing so far?
Don’t remember
Name: Philippa
Hewitt, Age:18
Area
from:Torquay
DegreeMaths& management
science
Traffic light status: Red
View of Southampton so far
I like the shopping
First night out where and rating
out of ten (ten being high)
The union, 8/10
Best thing so far?
My room in Hartley Grove
Worst thing so far?
The thought of lectures
Name:
Ruggero
Calo, Age26
Area
from:Bournemouth
Degree: Feet (Podiatry)
Traffic light status:Green
View of Southampton so far
Pleasant, not as cosmopolitan
as Bournemouth
First night out where and
rating out of ten (ten being
high)
Academy, 6/10
Best thing so far?
Meeting my housemates
Worst thing so far?
My bed
SCENE
WESSEX
Wessexscene.co.uk
Editorial
This issue of WSX, with its
‘graphical’ layout and thought
provoking articles, is one I am
immensely proud of. Today
more landmines are planted
than removed and their longterm effects are devastating to
communities all over the
world. With the military
action in Afghanistan, those in
power could do well to hold
the consequences in mind.
Thanks go out to Colin for
allowing the use of his
stunning photos and for his
time.
Although Timmy kept me
waiting for four hours to
interview him and I had
envisaged some not so
complimentary headlines for
‘Mr Wackaday’, he turned out to
be relatively harmless!
Another big thank you to all
those who took the time and
guts to participate in ‘fresher’s
soap’ (definitely worth a look!)
and ‘devil’s advocate’ (there are
always two sides to every
coin!).
WSX can never have too many
contributions so please keep
them coming thick and fast. Any
comments or contributions
please forward to
WSX@wessexscene.co.uk
Love
KateX
FRESHER AFTER YOUR
DEGREE?
Verity James
Graduation was, for me, not only a
moment of celebration but of
sadness and reflection as my time as
an English student at Swansea
University drew to a close.
However a new and exciting
chapter of my life opened as I began
a masters in Social Work at
Southampton University. I was a
fresher all over again. How many
people have the opportunity of
experiencing fresher’s week twice
and going to two fresher’s balls? I
was the envy of all my friends about
to start work in the big wide world!
However fresher’s week as a
master’s student was very different
from my experience three years ago
when I left home and came to
university for the first time.
Although it wasn’t as exciting as
being a ‘brand new’ fresher, I had
the advantage of knowing what to
expect. I knew the ‘do’s and
‘don’ts’ of student life, how to look
after yourself and how universities
work. I was a fresher who didn’t
just live on microwave food,
realised it was a good idea to attend
tutorials and already knew just how
tired everyone gets of saying what
A levels they have and where they
come from. Also moving to
Southampton meant that I still had
the excitement of a new town to
explore and new people to meet.
In fact, the only disadvantage I
experienced was people’s attitudes
towards masters’ students. Many
people imagine them to be serious,
boring individuals. For
example, a fellow masters student,
enjoying a drink in the bar in halls,
revealed her identity to a fresher
who promptly excused herself and
walked away.
Even the
introductory talk in halls assured us
not to worry about not experiencing
such a full social life as first-time
freshers! However I find life as a
fresher masters student as exciting,
if not more so than being a first time
fresher. The people I meet are more
diverse and so interesting, a mixture
of ages and nationalities. My
course, being vocational, is
practical and exciting, including
both
lectures
and
practice
placements, and my social life is
still as active as ever. A surprising
number of students go on to do
masters. Fewer jobs result in more
students remaining in higher
education as competition increases.
Being the baby of post-grad. Halls,
doing a masters at the age of 21,
makes me realise I am still young
with many exciting experiences to
come.
However, right now I am
appreciating university and being a
fresher all over again!
Manga Madness
PAGE 35
Kate Doherty
Walking into the Millais Gallery at
the Institute for the first time to view
a ‘Manga’ exhibition was a rather
surreal experience. Nestled in a
corner and surrounded by a small
group of strangely intent viewers, a
Japanese music video shrilled away
and as I self-conciously began my
tour around the room, my eyes were
opened to a totally new type of
cultural expression.
‘Manga’ is rather like a comic,
although to me that naïve expression
almost verges on vulgar as it is so
wholly insufficient to describe what
is referred to as ‘one of Japan’s
longest and largest cultural
phenomena.’ Slightly reminiscent of
pop artists such as Roy Lichtenstien
and highly influenced by traditional
forms of Japanese scroll painting,
‘Manga’ combines images and
dialogue to create a story; however
unlike Western comics, (apart from
the fact that, like Japanese characters,
Manga is read from right to left and
top to bottom), ‘Manga’ images are
not sufficient alone to tell a story,
rather they enhance the dialogue by
acting as symbolic images.
This aspect of ‘Manga’ is perhaps the
most important and the most
interesting. The vast spectrum of
imagery in Manga would be virtually
impossible to identify completely as
they can range from the detailed,
elegant stories of traditions such as
cherry blossom viewing (see picture:
Uzuki (April) by Sugiura Hinako)
and reminders of the Edo period in
Japan where courtesans were painted
by beijing specialists, to stories such
as Yakan Hiko’s ‘An Antique Moon:
The Night Flight’ about a cactus who
becomes alive and runs away with
other cacti, in the middle of the night,
on an aeroplane! Nevertheless, what
they all have in common is that they
record Japanese life in some shape or
form.
Some are intended to portray the
traditional aspects of Japan that are
still largely entrenched in daily life,
others are more fantastical as they
combine fantasy battles and fables
with historical fact; hence, Yamada
Akihilio’s ‘Casebook of Ghostly
Mysteries’ which
is
rather
reminiscent of characters like ‘Sailor
Moon’ and latterly, ‘Pokemon’ which
have both made it to the West.
Although not exactly sociobiographical, they are perhaps
intended more to introduce a world
which can act as an escape route from
the extreme pressures of Japanese
business life.
In the late 1970’s ‘Manga’ artists
began to display everyday family life
at home in a much more realistic way.
Women and their duties, their
relationships with men and their
children
and
the
overall
disintegration of the traditionally
stable family unit,
became
prominent images for ‘Manga’ and
despite the fact that often, not many
words are used, they can
nevertheless, be intensely effective.
One that sticks out in my mind was
by Yamada Muasaki, ‘The Rainy
Season from the Mischievous Cat’.
It comprises of relatively little
dialogue, but the sensitive way in
which the images are arranged makes
this short interaction between a
housewife and a cat very intense and
strangely effective. The loneliness of
the housewife and the acute way in
which the feline friend picks up on
this was beautiful in a very fleeting,
simple way. (I have to admit though,
as an devoted cat lover, I am slightly
biased.)
I was slightly sceptical about what I
had always, perhaps foolishly,
considered to a rather crude form of
art. Comics were about Batman and
Spiderman and should be reserved
for little boys and collectors...weren’t
they? However, on reflection the
hour or so I spent in the exhibition
was fairly enlightening, especially as
any previous exposure I had had to
Japanese art had been constricted to
traditional forms and paintings.
Perhaps what makes ‘Manga’ so
popular is that it is so accessible to
the masses. Its subject matters are so
broad and varied; business, action,
everyday life and even teenage
fantasy and the passage into
adulthood, that people of all ages can
read it and enjoy it. Indeed, ‘Manga’
contributes to two thirds of the 2.6
million yen brought in every year by
printed media. Business men and
women read it on the way to work,
children read it at home and
university students are also known to
be avid supporters. It retains artistic
integrity and talent while providing a
passage into everyday life and also an
escape from that life when needed.
Perhaps the precarious and often
unclear
relationship
between
dialogue and image offers the reader
an opportunity to interpret it in the
way that they want to and thus, it is
suddenly personal and intimate - and
in that way, a more refined form of
Pop Art than any Western artist has
achieved.
The exhibition is now in Brighton,
however the Millais Gallery is now
hosting a Photography exhibition,
‘The Shape of Time: Rockfalls,
Rivermouths and Ponds’ by Jem
Southam.
It is showing until
December 1 and revolves around
three interlocking photographic
series about land formations.
Admission is free and the Museum is
located just off the Avenue at The
Institute.
PAGE 36
Verity James
You’re guaranteed to find one at
every Halloween party, but in the
past it wasn’t so popular to be a
witch. Looking back in history,
people strongly believed in the
supernatural. This was largely due
to a lack of scientific knowledge to
explain
frightening
natural
phenomena. However, witchcraft
was
also
beyond
their
understanding and control, and
consequently a belief to be feared.
In a male-dominated society, people
were especially scared of the whole
concept of a woman with power and
as a result, the persecution of
suspected witches, which began in
the thirteenth century, is not an
uncommon occurrence in any
history book.
It is not surprising that living
against a backdrop of social unrest
and recurrent famines and plagues,
people became obsessed with the
devil and not only blamed those
regarded as witches for these
problems but perceived them as the
answer for such inexplicable and
terrifying occurrence’s. Any woman
who fitted the typical image of a
witch could be accused, for example
if she lived alone or was physically
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
Hubble, Bubble, Toil and Trouble
deformed in some way.
Witchcraft, viewed as instigated by
Satan, was considered a heresy and
denial of God. In 1484 Pope
Innocent V111 told the clergy of
Europe to leave no stone unturned
in the search for witches. Two years
later a comprehensive and explicit
manual, ‘Malleus Maleficarun,’
which means ‘the witches hammer,’
was issued to guide the witch-hunts.
Various signs by which witches
could be detected, such as red spots
or areas of insensitivity on the skin,
supposedly made by the claw of the
devil when touching the person to
seal a pact, were described. To
identify people with the ‘Demonic
Mark,’ areas of insensibility to pain,
professional Witch Prickers went
from town to town sticking pins into
the bodies of the accused. Dunking
was also used as a method of
identifying a witch. The accused
would be dunked in a river. If she
floated she was thought to be in
league with the devil and put to
death. However, if she sunk she
was innocent but drowned anyway.
The manual specified that a
person’s sudden loss of reason was
a symptom of demonic possession
and that burning was the usual
method of driving out the supposed
demon. Over the next several
centuries hundreds of thousands of
women, men and children were
allegedly accused, tortured and put
to death. The last execution of a
witch was in Switzerland in 1782.
For some time the prevailing
interpretation has been that all the
mentally ill of the later Middle Ages
were considered witches. If a
‘suspect’ did not respond to the
prickings, this was evidence of their
madness, for anaesthesia is
regarded as a symptom of hysteria.
Therefore it is not a sign that a
person is a witch. More careful
analyses of witch-hunts, however,
reveal that many more sane than
insane people were tried. Delusions
like the confessions were typically
obtained during brutal torture.
Similarly, insensitivity to pain has
many causes, including organic
dysfunctions. There were also
many cases of deliberate trickery.
Often during pricking, a needle was
attached to a hollow shaft so that it
did not actually puncture the skin,
although to observers it appeared to
be penetrating deeply. In this way
people in power could take their
revenge on someone they hated. For
example, if they despised a
neighbour they could accuse that
person of being a witch and use
false evidence against them.
In the Seventeenth century, witch
trials were carries out in courts not
just in England but throughout the
world including countries such as
America, Spain, Sweden and
France. The most famous episode
of witchcraft that occurred in
America was the Salem incident
during which many women were
accused of witchcraft. However, it
is likely that ergot poisoning
probably caused the afflictions of
the accused, for example their
disorderly speech and convulsive
fits.
SCENE
WESSEX
However, the perception of witches
throughout the ages has changed
dramatically. Witches were once
feared and suspects persecuted, but
now being a witch is the ‘cool,’
fashionable thing to be! Just look at
the modern witches of today’s films,
T.V series, books and even pop
groups!
Take the T.V series
‘Sabrina The Teenage Witch,’ about
a girl who goes to High school but
has magic powers. She is good
looking, popular and every teenage
girl’s idol. The beautiful Buffy,
‘The vampire slayer,’ (who once
would have been slayed for her
extraordinary powers) is on every
guy’s bedroom wall!)
The number of popular witches of
today in today’s society indicates a
growing fascination in witchcraft.
A girl band even use the theme of
witchcraft
in
their
name
‘Bewitched. Bewitched is also the
name of a comedy T.V. series set in
the 70’s where a housewife, her
mother and even her baby have
magic powers. They click their
finger and objects simply fly across
the room into their hand!
Films and books have been made
about witches, for example Roald
Dahl’s story ‘The witches’ and the
film ‘The Craft,’ not to mention all
the hype over ‘The Blair Witch
Project’ and its sequel. Perhaps
witches are popular in modern day
society because women have gained
equal rights. For example, Buffy
the vampire slayer is just as strong,
if not more so, than a man. She has
the power to slay vampires.
Witches were persecuted in the past
because men, who were probably
scared of women having power,
ruled society. Any woman who
behaved in an atypical way, for
example who was abnormally
strong would be accused of being a
witch.
Sabrina, Buffy and the characters on
‘Bewitched’ are undoubtedly good
witches. The perception of witches
has
dramatically
changed.
Witchcraft is now associated with
positive attitudes- but watch out this
Halloween- you may find a stray
wicked witch of the west and ‘she’ll
get you my pretties.’
PAGE 37
Wessexscene.co.uk
Should Britain be directly involved in the Military
campaign against Afghanistan?
YES NO
Joel Stobart
Daniel Eliasson
The British in the past 100 years have aid dropped by the US. Accusations
put up with far too much from the that a military campaign will merely
international terrorists: Lockerbie, be counter productive are bellied by
relatively
insignificant
Omagh and the Admiral Duncan pub the
to name but a few. They are a blight demonstrations in anti US regions.
the world over from ETA to the IRA
and from Al Quieda to the Tamil This campaign is a necessity for the
Tigers. People will always have their safety of Britian and other western
pet hates, people will always blame nations, a security that is more
oppression, and people will always tenuous than we perceived before
claim that they are an underclass. But September 11th and one is once
when a multimillionaire claims the again being threatened with the
right to use a terror-attack on a fellow spread of anthrax. It is unfortunate
democratic country, it is time to fight but Britain must act sooner rather
back. If anything I would advocate a than later.
ground war on terrorists in Syria,
Palestine, Indonesia, Iraq and where
ever else they may lie. What is the
point of living in a world where every
oppressed Tom, Dick or Osama is
free to kill tens of thousands of lawabiding citizens, without fear of Fiona Cowood
retribution? It’s time to make them
In my mind, Britain had no choice
afraid, very afraid….
but to support its ally in the war
against global terrorism. The
unimaginable
atrocities
of
September 11th could not go
without some form of retaliation,
and as long as America’s
Dan Nathan
motivation remains justice and not
Britian’s role in the current revenge, their campaign is totally
campaign is an unfortunate legitimate.
necessity, a result of the
circumstances beyond the our America’s military plan is aimed at
control. A terrorist attack of this striking strategic strongholds of the
magnitude is a declaration of war. It Taliban regime and this is where the
has left well over five thousand dead US differs from the perpetrators of
and has had a crippling effect on the last month’s attacks. Provided that
world economy as a whole. The a sustained humanitarian effort is
attacks were carried out by a few of made to help the repressed people
the most extreme zealots. These are of Afghanistan, America should
the individuals that we must destroy receive Britain’s fully-fledged
for our safety. It is essential that bin support.
Laden’s network is destroyed and
this can only be achieved by Had Canary Wharf or the City of
attacking him inside his safe haven London been the target of bin
of Afghanistan. Afghanistan itself Laden’s assault, we would have
has legitimised itself as a target by instantly looked to America for a
similar pledge of direct support. It
sheltering bin Laden.
is in the global interest to topple the
The Taliban are a horrendous regime Taliban regime and deliver peace
without legitimacy and the fact that and democracy to the suffering
their overthrow has become an Afghan people. Since the regime
objective of the fact that their took hold, women have been
overthrow has become an objective exploited and freedom of speech,
of the conflict can only result in a religion and movement have been
long term increase in fortunes for replaced by poverty, repression and
injustice. Britain is completely
the Afghan people.
right to help America reverse this
Arguments that the US and Britain dire situation.
are not concerned as to the plight of
the Afghan people ignore not only I strongly feel that Britain should
the commitment to remove the also assist the US in intelligence
Taliban but also the ‘humanitarian operations which will penetrate
coalition’ that Blair worked so hard these networks and bring them
to attain and the thousands of tons of down once and for all.
September the 11th 2001 will be a
date not easily forgotten, nor will the
innocent lives that were lost in the
atrocities in New York, Washington
D.C and Pennsylvania. The
outpouring of emotion and support
are still both prevalent and pertinent
but they have been replaced swiftly
with feelings of anger, desire for
vengeance, and more alarmingly
some back-scratching of the highest
order.
Tony Blair pledged to stand shoulder
to shoulder with our American
friends, a pledge not only heartfelt
and honourable but, many would
argue, required. The question is,
whether proper consideration of what
that actually entails, was ever
calculated.
Now we are at war. No-one denies
there were heavy British casualties
nor would they argue that seeking
justice for those victims is not
imperative; but at what cost?
Muslims in this country now feel
alienated and in one case a taxi driver
was beaten and left paralysed from
the neck down. Furthermore, Tony
Blair’s europhille rhetoric seems
negated by his constant desire to take
a step away from the EU institution
he hails, and a step closer to the US.
Some would argue that Britain’s
position is more closely aligned with
the US in the first place and that a
step away from the EU is inevitable
if not desirable. Germany and France
on the other hand, who already
believe that Britain acts as a Trojan
horse which allows the Americans to
sneak in and influence the EU, now
feel their beliefs are compounded by
the PM’s stance.
Britain’s strong economy is
dwindling and a recession looms
over the horizon. At this time is
Britain’s militia really prepared to be
involved in a long drawn out
campaign whose cost is as yet
undetermined both economically and
even more worryingly in terms of
lives?
The attacks on September 11th
demonstrated the grudge the world
has with the US. Whether it is
because of their suspect foreign
policy or their seeming arrogance on
the international stage it is a grudge
with the US, not Great Britain. If the
outbreaks of anthrax in America and
this country are related to the people
George W. Bush refers to as
“the evil do-ers”, then Britain seems
to already be counting the cost of
standing shoulder to shoulder with
the USA.
Nick Hooper
Consider US involvement in
international events in the last fifty
years and notice that most of them
have been high profile and media
driven. The Gulf war in all of our
lifetimes was a prime example of
America protecting its interests and
letting the world know. It was also a
reminder of how Anglo-American
loyalties still operated. The UK
provided a great deal of air support
and intelligence to what was
altogether considered to be
primarily an American war.
Project that position on to the
present situation in Afghanistan.
British efforts will perhaps gain just
enough recognition in the eyes of
Bin Laden, Al Queda and other
terrorists to consider the UK as a
worthwhile target for their attention.
That still doesn’t change the fact that
UK efforts will fall under
‘America’s War On Terrorism’. The
concern is that in the face of such an
enemy, Britain will help aim the
cross-hairs of terrorist attacks on its
own cities by involving itself too
heavily in the military campaign in
Afghanistan.
It is for a separate debate that the US
has decided to use force in its war on
terrorism, but is disturbing to note
that since they have done so it
appears as if terrorist activities have
escalated to an alarming level in
light of the recent Anthrax attacks.
Would the UK idealist attitude of
protecting freedom and peace still
apply if this country were under a
similar threat? Perhaps Britons
would be more secure if they
adopted a lower profile of support
like other European countries. The
essence of is that the UK should
pick their fight carefully, for it may
be long and much of it below the
belt.
we wish to emphasise that the views in this column are not necessarily those of the writers, the WSX editor, the Wessex Scene in general or the
Unions. The intention of Devil’s advocate is to encourage debate, discussion for the sake of argument
PAGE 38
Wessexscene.co.uk
We’re fighting
Louise Emma Clarke
MORE than one in three of us will
be diagnosed with cancer at some
point in our lives. Frightening,
isn’t it? One in three. Those of us
lucky enough not to contract the
disease will almost certainly be
close to somebody who does. One
of the most prevalent forms of the
illness is Breast cancer, the single
most common cause of death
among women aged 35-54. In
1998 almost 13,200 women died
from the disease. One in ten
women will contract this single
strain of cancer. We can no longer
sit back and ignore it. It’s time to
look the disease straight in the
eyes and say, ‘We’re fighting
back’.
October 2001 is Breast Cancer
Awareness Month; an annual
national health campaign organised
by all the major breast cancer and
cancer charities. The aim, above all,
is about raising awareness of the
disease. The more knowledge that
people like you and I have, the more
chance we have of catching the
cancer in its earliest stages,
dramatically improving our chances
of recovery.
So, what exactly is breast cancer?
The disease consists of a malignant
tumour in the breast. The cancer
attacks the tissue in which it first
started and then, without treatment,
starts to spread to other parts of the
body. Many of will have already
known somebody who has suffered
from the disease - not surprising
that in a single year an average of
35,000 people will be diagnosed.
What are the risks? The single
biggest risk factor is age - 80% of
breast cancer occurs in postmonopausal women. Other factors
can include a history of the disease
in your family - yet only 5 - 10% of
breast cancers detected are
hereditary.
However, whatever the risks, it is
crucial that we don’t become
complacent. We are all students and
the majority of us are in our early
twenties. It’s so easy to put breast
cancer to back of our minds,
demonstrating the age-old optimism
of ‘It won’t happen to me.’ Yes, the
risks are dramatically decreased for
back...
younger girls, but it can and does
happen. Geri Halliwell is the patron
of the charity ‘Breast Cancer
Aware’. She stresses this point in
saying, ‘Breast cancer in younger
women is rare, but it can happen...
Find out how to become breast
aware, make it part of your normal
health and beauty routine, like
working out or going to the dentist
and take control of this really
important area of your wellbeing.’
How to become aware of your
breasts... The most important way
that we should all become breast
aware is to know what is normal for
ourselves. Lisa Grosser, Younger
Women’s Breast Care Nurse, is
keen to point this out. She said,
‘most women’s breasts are naturally
lumpy and we often have one breast
bigger than the other. The point of
being breast aware is to know what
is normal for you, so that you can
spot any changes early on and get
them checked out.’
So, what are the changes that we
should look out for?
* Change in size of one of your
breasts - is it any lower or larger
than usual?
* Nipple inversion
* A strange rash or discharge
* Puckering or dimpled skin
* A constant pain in the breast or
armpit
SCENE
WESSEX
ALMOST all students at the
University of Southampton
have visited the Glen bar. Its
mock-tudor design makes it
more of a pub than a youth
hostel. And the new cinema
upstairs has added to the
facilities it provides the
resident’s in the area of the
Glenn Eyre Halls of residence.
In March Si Cook took over as
bar manager after serving his
time as assistant bar manager.
After the published ‘quitting’ of
the bar committee in January,
Si
says
a
‘satisfactory
agreement for all sides has been
reached’ and the bar committee
is working well with business
services.
Friday of fresher’s week, the
England Greece game was
shown and there was a ‘back to
school party’ -bit of a running
theme this fresher’s week! So
what was that day like for the
Glen Eyre Bar Manager??
Name: Si Cook
Age: 21
Degree: 3rd
students
* A swelling in the armpit or collar
bone
It’s important for every woman,
young or old, to know the things to
look out for - and to, most
importantly, make regular checks.
If you do notice any lumps or
changes to your breasts, make sure
you report it immediately to your
doctor. The good news is that 90%
of lumps found in breasts will not
be cancerous - but make that trip to
the doctors as a precaution. Early
detection of breast cancer will
increase survival rates to up to 90%.
Being breast aware can then, quite
literally, save your life.
Not leaving out the men... I know
it’s difficult to believe, but it’s a fact
that men can contract breast cancer
too. Every year 1% of those
diagnosed are male. 1% may not
sound like a great deal, yet it means
that up to 350 men are are told that
they have the disease annually. The
risks are, of course, much lower
than for females - but the bad news
is that breast cancer spreads much
quicker in males due to the fact that
they have less tissue in the breast
area. Time is very much of the
year
Politics
Position: Glen Bar Manager
essence and the cancer must be
caught quickly to stop the spread of
the disease.
Breast Cancer Care is a national
charity that offers information and
support to people affected by breast
cancer. The charity provides
services to both women and men
who have the disease and to their
families and friends. It also offers
help to members of the public. They
operate a FREE national helpline to
anyone that seeks support or just
further information on breast
cancer. If you would like to speak to
somebody from the charity call
0808 800 6000. Alternatively, visit
their
website
at
www.
breastcancercare .org.uk.
Breast cancer is something that we
can not ignore. We all need to
become increasingly aware of our
own breasts to stop the disease in its
tracks. Wear your pink ribbon with
pride. Spread the word to everyone
you know - help them to become
aware of the risks. You could be
saving their life.
No of people you monopolise:
3 in the bar committee
10 bar supervisers
30 bar staff
10.00 Pull on yesterday’s
clothes and struggle up to the
bar with Stu (assistant bar
manager). We decide how
much stock we need for the day
and night’s antics. Give Cain
(University Hall Bar Manager)
a call with the stock list
needed. Tidy up the bar from
the carnage of the night before
and work out what staff will be
working the afternoon shift (as
the England Greece match is
being shown in the cinema
room so the bar will be open
too).
1400 Leave Stu in charge of
the bar and head to watch the
match away from the Glen bar,
a need to get away from the bar
but probably should have been
there.
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 39
Wessexscene.co.uk
DAY IN THE LIFE
Ever wanted to know more about what student’s do for university life at the University of Southampton? Ever wondered how
much work actually goes into the success of the clubs and societies on a day-to-day level? If you’re scornful then maybe you
don’t appreciate the amount of time, commitment and downright hard work many people put into the myriad of student
activities that go on at the University.
1600 Keep in contact with Stu
and Cain via phone to check all is
in place. Phone Will (treasurer)
to remind him to get change for
the bar. On Monday, the first
night of the bar opening Will
forgot to get the float, so we had
no change!
1800 Start sorting out my
costume for the night - my usual
posh spice look alike outfit with
the fishnets and padded bra!
1900 Head up to the bar.
Refresh the old bar staff working
on prices, check all is ok with
events and organize security.
Lots of mindless organisation.
1955 Discover the beer cooler
is switched off! This means the
beer is hot, foamy and stinks! I
had switched it off the night
before because it was freezing
over the last couple of day. I had
meant to turn it on in the day but
forgot! Call Cain.
2000 No beer on tap. But some of
the ugliest girls with beards
stride through the doors and the
bar is manic almost immediately.
The male staff keep getting asked
for bottles on the bottom shelf,
think it’s because they can look
up our skirts!
2015 Cain arrives. He puts all
the ice in the ice machine into the
cooler and within 30 minutes we
should have beer back on. Not a
good way to start the night.
2045 Beer back on. An
unnamed female starts grabbing
a male bar staff’s boobs, he
demanded the right in return, and
she let him!
2200 Run out of Smirnoff ice
and Reef. Also getting some
lippy fresher’s who claim not to
be getting served fairly. At the
Glen Bar, staff are always rightwe don’t back up drunk
students!
0000 The bar closes- late
licence. The bar staff head to
the dance floor.
0030 A shout out for the bar
staff- much appreciated.
0100 Back to School party
finishes! Everyone falls out.
Start the process of cleaning up.
0200 Kyu delivers with free
burger’s all round!
0230 Close up and crawl
home.
2130 Having to make sure the
bar staff are working and not pulling
too many freshers! No glasses left!
IN-STORE OPPORTUNITIES
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bright, enthusiastic people to come on board.
Opportunities exist in every part of this exciting retail operation – from selling and catering to administration, distribution and
warehousing. We also offer a huge range of full and part-time hours, and a choice of temporary or permanent roles.
Along with full training, we’ll encourage you to achieve your full potential in our supportive family atmosphere. And that’s not the
only great advantage of joining the John Lewis Partnership.
All our permanent staff are Partners with a real share in the profits. This year, all Partners received an additional 10% of their basic
salary through profit sharing. Plus you’ll enjoy this fantastic range of benefits:
❑ Four weeks’ holiday per year, rising to five weeks after three years’ service
❑ Discounts on purchases in John Lewis department stores and Waitrose food shops
❑ Non-contributory pension operation
❑ Life assurance arrangements
❑ Subsidised staff business dress
❑ Subsidised dining room
Interested? For further details or an application form simply call into our staff office on the
Upper Ground Floor, or call on 023 80 216 444
PAGE 40
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
Fancy a trip to the theatre..?
Andrew Lloyd Webber’s blockbuster musical Sunset Boulevard,
starring Faith Brown, will be at The Mayflower this Autumn
(7 November - 8 December).
Based on Billy Wilder’s classic film, Sunset Boulevard is set in 1950s
Hollywood - the city of dreams - where it weaves a magnificent tale
of faded glory and unfulfilled ambition. Now you get the chance to
see this stunning production which was nominated for 7 prestigious
Tony Awards on its first ever UK tour!
The Wessex Scene is giving you the chance to see this production
which runs from 7th November - 8th December.
Where is the original Sunset Boulevard?
email answers to competitions@wessexscene.co.uk
Wok this Way!
Win tickets to catch a sneak preview of A Christmas Carol at the Nuffield Theatre.
Simply answer
Who is Scrooge’s dogsbody in A Christmas Carol?
email answers to competitions@wessexscene.co.uk
GET TRIGGER
HAPPY!
Thanks to Abbey National we’ve
got 5 fantastic woks to give away.
If you want to branch out of pasta
and into stir fry then answer this
question.
Celebrating the success of Channel
4’s series: Trigger Happy TV, Vivid
is launching a range of products
based on the infamous TV
characters.
c) Chow Yung
Available from November 2001,
you can get loud and proud with
your very own Inflatable Mobile
Phone measuring a whopping 70cm
in which you can slot your own
phone for authentic “Trigger
Happy” moments out and about.
If you want to
open an Abbey
National Student
Who brought Chinese Account, then call
cooking to the masses?
the Hotline
a) Jackie Chan
today...
b) Ken Hom
Answers to
competitions@wessexscene.co.uk
01794 511653
Slip your mobile into a nifty new
Mobile Phone Case branded with
key phrases from the series and
designed to appear as though Dom
Jolly is actually holding your
phone! Annoy everyone around
you with three collectable Talking
keychains featuring character
phrases including the classic Phone
Man and Traffic Warden or glug
your ‘Rosie Lee’ from an
assortment of mugs featuring these
two famous faces.
To get in on the Trigger Happy action, answer this
question
Who stars in the cult Channel 4 series?
Answers to competitions@wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 41
Wessexscene.co.uk
GET THE VIRUS B4 IT GETS U
The new and deadly VIRUS can be
carried unsuspectingly on your wrist
and be passed from one player to
another the more they interact.
Thrills and excitement can be
transmitted at the touch of a button
and friends can be lost with a devious
twist of the controls. Your life will
never be the same again...
Games of varying skill levels will test
even the most hardened gamer and its
definitive urban styling and
indestructible moulded shell make it
a must-have fashion item.
VIRUS WATCH is a multi-functional
gadget complete with basic watch
functions, Viruses, four games,
concealed Virus shield and text
messaging facility of up to 20
characters.
Set to be the most wanted gadget for
big kids everywhere in 2001, get
your hands on a Virus Watch!
If it’s 9.00am in New York, then
what time is it in Tokyo?
Answers to
competitions@wessexscene.co.uk
If you
recognise
yourself
amongst these
brazen
hussies, then
hide your
shame (and
those puppies)
and collect
£10 each from
VP Comms on
Level 2.
PAGE 42
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
Taming the Tiger
had to make a change. We now go to
Avondale and Academy.
How successful has this change
been?
Well, I admit I was quite worried at
first, but so far things are going well.
The clubs seem to have respected the
transition, and I have had positive
feedback about the new venue. I
don’t think it has been the anarchy
that the establishments expected only one person got kicked out last
week. (This is a good record is
it?!...Ed.)
You must miss your drunken
outings to clowns. Do you
remember a couple of years ago,
when you threatened to bugger
one of our friends that had come to
visit Southampton?!
(Laughs) ermm...my first and second
years at University passed in a bit of
a drunken haze! I don’t really
remember, but I do apologise!
Photo: Stephen Edwards
MANY of you will know him
already by reputation or from
hideously drunken scenes at
Clowns and Jesters over the past
three years. Now he is AU
president. We caught up with the
infamous ‘Tiger’ to see how he is
coping with his new role...
What motivated you to become
AU president?
I have been completely involved in
sports at the university for the past
four years, in fact I have practically
lived in the office, and this role
allows me to continue this and help
with the further development of
sports here. I also love being a
student, and this gives me the chance
to carry on for another year (instead
of getting a proper job...Ed.).
What I eventually want to do is
become an actor, and I plan to go to
drama school. It would actually be in
my best interests to go straight in to
that now, so I am really just doing
this job for the love of it.
I do feel that I am the best person for
the job as I have been involved for so
long, and don’t come it without prior
knowledge of what it would entail.
Could you describe your typical
day?
With this job every day is different,
it’s a crazy job. I have to be prepared
for what comes my way. I usually
deal with any post first, and my
email. I often have to attend
meetings that concern both the
Union and the University. Problems
will often arise throughout the day,
which have to be dealt with, so there
is always something different.
What sort of problems do you deal
with?
Well, to give you an example, at the
moment I am trying to help the
tennis club get a team and a
committee together, as a lot of
people left last year, and the treasurer
was the only person left. I help with
injuries that people sustain while
playing sport for the university and
with financing and sponsorship. Also
room bookings for the different clubs
have been a bit of a nightmare to sort
out recently, partly because we lost
the clubs and societies room, so that
takes up time.
How much do you get paid?
£18,300, Which works out at about
£200 a week after tax. It is quite a
good wage on a
quiet week, but at the moment I have
been working about 60 hours a week,
and working
weekends so it has been pretty time
consuming.
What changes do you feel that you
have initiated? Have you
completed your pledges?
My aim was to complete my
manifesto before my term of office
officially started, so that I would then
be free to deal with problems as and
when they materialised. I feel that I
have achieved this. I have continued
to provide kit and got money for the
clubs through kit sales. I said I would
improve transport to Wellington
sports ground, and I have continued
the support of the colours clubs.
He is still traumatised!
Have any plans been made for the
AU ball?
We have booked the Guildhall, and
hopefully the union will back the
budget! So far we are getting the
Batten sisters (Olympic silver medal
runners), and John Inverdale (sports
presenter and honorary graduate).
Can we have free tickets?
No comment!
What has been the most
embarrassing moment of your
university career?
Probably when I had three S.W.A.T
teams after me! I was going out for a
ladies football social (I used to coach
them), and decided to go in fancy
dress. I wore full combat gear and
took my B.B gun, and a local
resident called the police.
Later there were pictures of me on
Crimewatch! (Yeah right...Ed.)
We have heard that there are
various
horrible
initiation
ceremonies that take place in the
sports clubs. Have you taken part?
Yes, I have been through the ritual of
the Football Club initiation in my
first year. It was a bit daunting before
hand but it proved to be a
tremendous unifying experience for
all of us that took part. There was the
infamous will inspection that was
conducted by Ladies Football.
Whether I passed or not, I’ll leave to
your imagination....
Nice!
Lastly, why are you called Tiger?
I have had that name since the first
year. I was playing pub golf, and had
a Nike Baseball cap on, and people
just started chanting ‘Tiger Woods’.
Right. On that note, I think that’s
about everything!
With regards to transport to
Wellington; why was it that on the
first Sunday of term, when people
needed to get there for trials, there
were no buses provided?
That was a problem with Uni-Link. I
spoke to them, and they assured me
that buses would be running to
Wellington on that day. They seem to
be having a few teething problems
this term. Hopefully there won’t be a
problem in future.
For training on Monday, Tuesday
and Thursday I arranged for the
safety bus to run. I am currently
working on a system whereby people
can pay £5 each for the safety bus to
run them to training all year. This
should be in effect by the time of
going to press.
One of your pledges was to
improve relations with Jesters.
However, you no longer have your
AU nights there. Why is this?
I have many fond memories of
Clowns and Jesters, having spent
many drunken nights there.
However, I have to look after the
social interests of the clubs. The
owner of Jesters complained that
there were too many AU people
coming down on Wednesdays, and
that it was bad for business. He said
that they could accommodate some
of the clubs but not all of them, so I
Photo: Pete Wood
The President hard at work
SCENE
WESSEX
Wessexscene.co.uk
Sporting
Website of the
Issue:
SOTON F.C IN NEW
MANAGER SHOCK
SPEAKING of Ugly footballers,
(although he has not actually made
it onto the website yet...) Scotsman
Gordon Strachan has recently
been confirmed as the new
Southampton
manager.
He
replaces Stuart Gray, who was
sacked on Sunday after only 10
games since taking over in the
summer.
A statement from the club said:
“In Gordon we have appointed a true
leader who has managed and played
at the highest level. Gordon brings
knowledge, experience, passion, and
motivation to the club.”
“This club has a great future in our
wonderful new stadium and all our
attentions are now directed to
Wednesday’s (24th of October) home
game against Ipswich.”
Featuring in the website’s ‘Beauty and the Beast’ section, this couple
- but which is which?!
Susannah and Christina
WHILE surfing the net the other
day, we came across this great
homage to the aesthetically
challenged
among
the
professional
footballing
community.
It features truly minging photos of
beauties such as Peter Beardsley, Ian
Durie,
Lee
Chadwick
and
Southampton favourite Matt Le
Tissier,
offering
hours
of
entertainment. Focusing not only on
the players themselves it also
illustrates the hordes of ugly
followers of the sport, from
unfortunate fans and streakers (who
PAGE 43
Ironically, Strachan had a similar
kind of dismissal to Gray about 6
weeks before joining Southampton,
when he left his managerial position
at Coventry. His departure was said
to be an act of ‘mutual consent,’
although Strachan himself has said he
sympathises with Gray, and
understands how he feels.
outcome of the Southampton Vs
Ipswich game will already be known
when this paper is printed, a local
radio station predicted that the saints
will loose 5 nil. Lets hope this
prediction is wrong!
The players also seem to feel a
certain amount of sympathy towards
Gray: Southampton’s newest arrival,
the £4 million Rory Delap (an ex
Derby player, and the saints most
expensive signing) has been reported
to say that he is ‘gutted’ for Stuart,
although keen to get on with it and
win the next game. Strachan, a well
respected (and at times frightening)
character is confident he will be able
to fill the void that has been left by
Gray’s departure.
Last year, the arrival of the new
stadium brought with it a whole
series of promises and hopes for the
future of both the club, and the
surrounding
areas.
With
Southampton’s current performance,
many people are left wondering if
leaving the dell was actually
beneficial to the club. There has been
talk of the ‘st Mary’s curse’ and
moral among players and supporters
alike is becoming quite low, as the
very bottom of the premiership table
gets ever closer.
Hopefully the arrival of strachan will
help Southampton see victory in their
new ground, as there are growing
concerns that the team are unable to
win in their new home. Although the
If anyone has any opinions on this,
them e.mail us at:
wessexsport@hotmail.com.
Chrissy
lets face it, never look good), to the
unusual choice of wife that many
footballers seem to make.
The section entitled ‘Beauty and the
Beast’ shows us these bizarre
couplings, and prompts one to
ponder such questions as ‘how did
Matt Le Tissier manage that?!’.
In the case of the Beckhams
however, the jury is still out as to
which one is the ‘beauty’ and which
the ‘beast’. I think we can answer
that one - they are both munters!
So if you want a chance to laugh at
those players who make ridiculous
amounts of money for kicking a ball
around, check this out...
Susie and Chrissy
Photos from the official saints website
Gordon Strachan: the new manager of southampton, and the new ground in st.
Mary’s. (What is that up his nose?!?)
EDITOR’S CORNERSPOT
to the computing services! Due to a
bizarre deletion of all our e.mails
and therefore, all our articles, we’ve
had to spend the last week running
around frantically, and getting up at
stupidly eary times, trying to sort
everything out. Thanks a lot guys!
Ok, enough complaining now. Our
new contact address is
Wessexsport@hotmail.com
WATCH OUT COMPUTER GEEKS !
Photos from Ugly footballers.com
A sample from the website: streakers, mmm...tasty!
WITH the success of the
university teams in the walkabout
cup, it looks like this is going to be
an interesting and exciting year
for sport. We would like to take this
opportunity to say congratulations
to all of you who took part. It s
sounds like the institute were
outmatched on the pitch by superior
skill, and off the pitch by superior
drinking. Not that we’d know
anything about a social life, thanks
Feel free to e.mail anything
interesting (or not...) to do with
sport.
BYEEEE!!!!
Chrissy and Suzie. X
PAGE 44
SCENE
WESSEX
Wessexscene.co.uk
GO KARTING!
However, the team results were to
be taken as the sum of the point
scores of the four drivers in each
team. On first sight of the individual
driver results, things were looking
Photos from the University Karting club
IN the Spring of this year,
Southampton University Karting
Team (SUKT) took part in rounds
4 and 5 of the five race InterU n i v e r s i t y K a r t i n g
Championship.
The full race team squad consisted
of 11 people, from which 8 drivers
were selected for each race meeting
for the two, 4-driver A and B teams.
After the first three rounds, Soton
A’s 6th, 3rd, and 5th place finishes
left the team in joint 2nd in the
championship and, after finishing
2nd in the 2000 Championship, we
were hopeful that we might be able
to catch championship leaders
Nottingham and take the title. Soton
B had a disappointing start to the
season, finishing 18th and Gosport
and Milton Keynes, but an excellent
4th place at Whilton Mill gave the
team a well deserved result and a
much needed confidence boost.
After visiting the relatively modern
circuits at Gosport, Milton Keynes
and Whilton Mill, rounds 4 and 5
visited the older and more
established circuits Clay Pigeon and
Shenington. These circuits have
been synonymous with the British
Karting scene for nearly 30 years,
and have been used for the Junior
and Senior British Championships
many times. It was now time for the
Inter-Uni Championship fraternity
to get a taste of the circuits.
The meeting at Clay consisted of a
practice and qualifying session,
followed by a 3-hour endurance
race with a mandatory fuel stop.
The weather was changeable to say
the least, and we arrived to find a
damp but quickly drying track. The
track was almost dry by qualifying,
and Nick Henry and Jem Barnard
qualified the A and B teams 7th and
16th respectively. Ashley Cromack
and
Jem started the race for the teams,
but by the start the rain began to
fall, and after holding position for
the first couple of laps, both drivers
were caught out by the conditions,
losing some valuable places.
However, after about 20 minutes,
the rain stopped, and both Ash and
Jem began to make their way
through the field. Phil Kendall and
Chris Nelson took over for the
second stints of the race, and
continued the good progress.
Unfortunately, as the half-way point
and the fuel stops approached, both
teams suffered punctures within
minutes of each other, so we
decided to do our next driver
changes, fuel stops, and replacing
the offending tyres in one pit stop.
After these long stops, Andy Davis
and Iain Back took over, and drove
excellently to make up the lost time
during the stops, ending their stints
in 12th and 13th place.
Nick and Darren Tomes took over to
finish the race, but as these runs
started, the rain started falling
heavily, making racing on slick
tyres very treacherous. However,
both Nick and Darren rose to the
task, with Nick charging through
the field to get the A team up to 7th
place by the finish. Darren also
drove well despite it being his first
wet race, and brought the B team
kart home in 12th place.
However, generally we were a little
disappointed with the result, as we
were hoping for a top 5 finish for a
least one of the teams. Now, with
one round to go, Nottingham’s 2nd
place at Clay had virtually
guaranteed them the championship,
with Soton A 8 points behind them
in 2nd place, 8 points ahead of
Cardiff
A.
However,
the
championship positions were taken
from the best 4 out
of 5 rounds, and with this taken into
account, it was going to the a close
run thing for 2nd in the
championship between Soton A,
Swansea A, Kingston, and Cardiff
A, with all four teams covered by 2
points. Meanwhile, Soton B’s result
left the team 15th in the
championship, and so Shenington
would be the deciding round, where
we were again confident that both
teams could get a good result.
Shenington again greeted us with a
day of mixed weather, and it turned
out to be a day of mixed fortunes for
Soton’s
two
teams.
The
championship went back to a sprint
race, Grand Prix format after three
endurance races, with each driver
racing in 4 heats of 6 laps with
‘random’ grid positions. However,
due to the nature of the circuit, with
its long straights and fast, sweeping
corners, overtaking was pretty easy,
and the high-grip surface was far
more forgiving in the wet than Clay
Pigeon.
The first few heats were held in dry
conditions, but just in time for
Nick’s second heat the rain started
falling very heavily, and the circuit
resembled a river more than a race
track. Aquaplaning was a huge
problem on the standard slick tyres,
but Nick, Jem and Phil all had
excellent races in these conditions.
New recruit David Coles did
especially well to cope with the
conditions and steadily improved
throughout the day, in his first ever
outdoor race meeting. A particular
highlight was the one-two achieved
by Nick and Phil, dominating the
heat after starting on the back row
(11th and 12th) of the grid.
good for the A team, with Nick
finishing 3rd overall, and Phil,
Andy Wake, and Jem finishing 24th,
25th and 26th respectively, out of
100 drivers! With these results the A
team finished an excellent 2nd place
- our best result of the season.
However, Soton A finished 3rd in
the championship, as Kingston’s
3rd place on the day meant that they
beat us to 2nd in the championship
by one point! The B team had a bit
more of a disappointing day
finishing 19th, and ended up
finishing 17th in the final
championship table. However, this
disappointment was tempered by
the fact that we had finished in the
top 3 in the championship for the
second year in succession - the first
team to do so in the 4-year history in
the championship.
So, as we start another year at
Southampton University, another
championship season will soon be
upon us, and we are looking for a
wealth of new, talented drivers to
join the squad. A lot of last year’s
squad have graduated now, and we
are looking for some drivers to take
their place. No experience is
necessary, as karting is not too
difficult to pick up, but if there are
any of you out there, particularly
freshers, who have any karting
experience, then we would love to
hear from you. There will be team
trials at some point during this term
(before Christmas), so for more
information email Nick on
njh298@soton.ac.uk or look at the
teams
official
website
(www.suk.motorpage.com).
Nick Henry
The Results:
- Round 4, Clay Pigeon
1
2
3
4
5
7
12
Swansea B
Nottingham A
Loughborough A
Kingston A
York A
Southampton A
Southampton B
- Round 5, Shenington
1
2
3
4
5
19
Loughborough B
Southampton A
Kingston A
Nottingham A
Birmingham
Southampton B
Final Championship Results
1
2
3
4
5
17
Nottingham A
Kingston A
Southampton A
Cardiff A
Swansea A
Southampton B
10
15
16
19
20
52
Photos from the University Karting club
PAGE 46
Wessexscene.co.uk
SCENE
WESSEX
FOOTBALL IN QUESTION?
The Daily Echo
Mark Wood
BILL SHANKLY once famously
said of football, ‘It’s not a matter
of life and death, it’s more
important than that.’ In the world
of today though does this
sentiment still hold true? Did it
ever hold true?
On
Sunday
7th
October
Southampton’s new St. Mary’s
Stadium played host to an
international fixture between Japan
and Nigeria infront of just under
12,000 people. This was only the
second time in Southampton F.C.’s
history that they have staged an
international fixture, but there can
scarcely have been a more fitting
occasion to do so. Both sides
included many star names within
their squads, but many unfortunately
failed to appear. Although the crowd
did get to see some stars of the
English game with the likes of
Celestine Babayaro, Finidi George
and Yoshikatsu Kawaguchi all
making appearances. With the new
ground heralding a new chapter in
the history of the club, it is only
natural that the city and club should
aspire to stage international football.
Those people who did attend were
treated to an extremely entertaining
game between two of the worlds
most up-and-coming teams who will
both be competing in the World Cup
in 2002. In an evenly contested
game, shown live on Japanese
television, it was a rare treat to be in
the midst of vocal and flambuoyant
support from both sets of supporters.
The ground echoed with the youthful
and enthusiastic cries of ‘Nippon’
from the Japanese supporters, and
swayed with the soulful chants from
the Nigerians. There was no need for
segregation between the two sets of
supporters as both helped to create
the
lively
and
harmonious
atmosphere.
It was a far cry from the riots and
violence that have so marred football
in recent years, and we need only
look across to the abandoned game
between France and Algeria to see
the ugly face of football
hooliganism. St. Mary’s witnessed
the way football can be an enjoyable
and fun experience, while the Stade
de France dragged the footballing
world once more into the gutter. Yet
this was only to be expected, as
modern national sporting events
have become the battlefields on
which political, religious and
ideological differnces are fought.
The years of antagonism between
France and Algeria was behind the
pitch invasions and the subsequent
abandonment of the game. Thus in
the same week the world was offered
a vision in Southampton of the way
football could be, while in France the
vision was of what to often is the
case.
So while the score at St. Mary’s
ended 2-2 and maybe helped to
appease both sets of supporters, I
don’t believe this is the reason for the
occasion taking place trouble free.
Both sets of supporters came to see a
‘football match’, that was all,
without imposing any ulterior factors
on the outcome and event. Mr
Shankly was right in one way,
football has come to symbolise far
more than just a sporting contest, it is
now a clash of beliefs, but as Sunday
showed, it doesn’t have to be
A Young Spectator at the match
SCENE
WESSEX
PAGE 47
Wessexscene.co.uk
HANDBALL WIZARDS
Men won convincingly crowning
themselves as double champions.
The ladies however were not so
lucky. Despite having a better start
than the men, they faltered at the
last hurdle, losing their first match
of the year in a nail biting final
against Leeds Metropolitan.
IT’S been an interesting start to the
year. I have finally completed my
arduous journey through the ranks
of the football club I can only hope
I stay there and I have just been
shoed for 80 mins playing for the
Freshers Rugby side. I finished the
game with two black eyes but Bish
kindly reminded me that I started it
with two as well. Firstly
congratulations to all those teams
that secured victories on the
opening day of the season lets
build on that and make 2001/2 a
HUGE season for Wessex sport.
It was because of the tremendous
success and team quality of last year
that the Men’s team has been
chosen as the English number one
seeds in the first ever Student
Commonwealth Games, next year.
The games are to be held in Kuala
Lumpur, Malaysia, the venue for the
last full Commonwealth games.
They are to take place in the latter
part of April 2002, and the team has
a real chance of coming home with
a third success title to add to their
crown and to go down in History as
the first every winners of Student
Commonwealth team gold in the
Universities 50 years of existence.
This year I am planning two major
Wessex Invasions. The first will be
to the sun kissed beaches of the
Isle of Man. To those of you that
have been I’m entrusting you to let
those that haven’t been know how
good it is. The many people that
have been on this tour regard it as
one of their best University
experiences. Don’t miss out. Last
time we went was in April 2000
and with over 150 people we were
the largest institution by far. I want
to ensure that we get the best
accommodation in the best
location so help me help your Tour
Secretaries help you by getting
those deposits in prompt and early.
Photos: The university handball club website.
David Martin
THE University’s Handball Club
has been making headlines in the
world of Student Sport. The
premier university side in the
whole of the British Isles is
coming off their most successful
season ever.
Last year saw the team start as the
underdogs of the University’s
league. As the season commenced
this opinion of the club soon
changed as the team took
commanding roles at the top of both
the Men’s and women’s leagues.
This trend continued through out
the year with both teams remaining
undefeated in their campaign for the
University’s division title (BUSA
equivalent). The men won every
single match that they participated
in, including a stunning victory over
bitter rivals Nottingham by 28 goals
to 6. This sounds more impressive
when you realise that the match was
only 30 minutes long.
The ladies won all their matches
except two, which finished in
draws, also both with Nottingham.
Then came the Universities Cup, the
men got off to a shaky start with a
one-goal victory over Leeds
Metropolitan in the opening group
stages. This near fall prompted the
team to rally together and play as a
unit. They proceeded to the final
undefeated and met the team that
had almost defeated them earlier in
the day, Leeds. Making sure to
prove themselves as champions, the
The second is the Summer
Invasion to the not quite so
beautiful coastline of Barbados.
Men’s Hockey and Cricket went
last year I want to take a shed load
more people. The more of us that
go the more the price goes down
and the better the tour will be. A
full itinerary of both tours will be
with your committee soon so if
you haven’t heard anything,
badger them into sorting it out.
Walkabout Walkover continued...
I would also like to tell you all that
AU Nights at Academy are about
to get better. Start planning your
fancy dress for Hallowe’en
because fingers crossed you will
go home with a monster and wake
up with a stunner.
That’s all form me except a big
thank you for all of you that got me
thoroughly wasted on the first AU
night. It was a pleasure. If you
want to hear more or regale any
tales of AU nights then please
phone my radio show or tune in on
Thursday mornings between 10
and 12 on SURGE 87.7 FM.
Photo: Simon Blazquez
we more than outmatched them at
drinking.
So on to the boat races. While our
ladies speedily drank their
beverage, the slow manner in
which the opposition sipped their
drinks meant that there would only
be one outcome. University 1
Institute 0.With the ladies event
being completely one sided, things
got even worse for the institute.
Having
been annihilated by two people in
a seven person race it was startling
to see the Institute boys make such
a gribbling effort at making
amends. The Uni boat race team,
made up of a combination of
Football and Rugby, won by three
(yes that’s right THREE) clear
people.
Tigger Des
Photo: Stephen Edwards
The esteemed Wessex tradition of
consuming copious amounts of
alcohol in a rapid manner was not
forgotten at the Walkabout. Having
matched the Institute for numbers a fantastic feat considering the
distance many of us had to travel -
The
SPECTACULAR
WALKABOUT
WALKABOUT
SPORT
WESSEX
Cup
wessexscene.co.uk 31st October 2001 - ISSUE 749 - PRICELESS
WALKABOUT
AL
Univer sity vs Institute in a 6 Spor t str ug g le for victor y
MATCH RESULTS
I have already mentioned the
football fixture but we also aim to
hold a Rugby match at the
Madjeski Stadium and a Cricket
fixture at the Hampshire Rose
Bowl. SO here’s to a hat trick of
victories! Last year we raised over
£8,500 for Leukemia Busters and
with three fixtures this.
Men’s:
Football
1st XI
2nd XI
Freshers
1-1
4-1
0-4
Rugby
Freshers
8-5
Hockey
1st XI
Freshers
2-1
4-0
Basketball Freshers
we lost
Ladies:
Football
Freshers
1-4
3rd XI
28-27
Freshers
35-23
Rugby
1st XV
7-5
Ph
oto
:
Netball
W KOVER
FOR the third successive year the
mighty University Stag was
rampant in the Walkabout Cup.
The awe inspiring 8-3 victory over
the Institute will hopefully mark the
start of an impressive season for
those Magnificent teams from the
Wessex.
The day got off to a flying start with
the Ladies Hockey team leading the
way with an early victory. The
Men’s Hockey teams not
wanting to be outdone
also
put
in
impressive
performances with the fresher’s side
enjoying a superb 4-0 victory.
The two Rugby matches were closer
affairs but both sides’ secured solid
wins the ladies leaving it to a last
minute conversion that toyed with
their emotions as it clipped the
crossbar before finally deciding to
drop over. Both Netball sides also
celebrated success with our University
3rd team beating the Institute 1st VII.
Following the hotly contested Varsity
football fixture played at the Dell it
was unsurprising to find so much
passion and bite on the pitch. With an
absolutely shocking decision being
made for the Institute goal, justice was
done when the University’s answer to
Jurgen Klinsmann won a
controversial penalty in the last
minute. So round one and
honours even, the second
Varsity meeting at the Friends
Provident will be an
interesting affair. The 2nd XI
bulldozed their way to an
impressive 4-1 victory but
unfortunately the 3rds where
unable to match this. With the scores
at 0-0 at half time they made several
changes and eventually lost 4-0. The
Ladies Football side were also
defeated but after an impressive year
last season we expect them to bounce
back.
It was great to be a part of this event
and the overwhelming sporting
success can only bode well for
Wessex as a whole this year. Having
finished 16th last season I hope that
we can build on this and secure a
place in the top ten. The results also
suggest that we may well gain victory
in the three upcoming Varsity
fixtures this year.
Cont. Inside....