Newcastle student wins free rent for a year Consniracy theories

N E W C A S T LE
U N IV E
EMOVE#
M 1 2 *8 3 1 7 8
MONDAY 25th APRIL 2005
Newcastle
student wins
free rent for a
year
By CHRIS STEPHENSON
S T U D E N T FA VO U R ITE The
Boat faces an uncertain future
following the unveiling of
Gateshead Council’s vision for
a revamped Gateshead side of
the River Tyne.
The news comes just days after the
popular club had its alcohol licence
renewed despite efforts from the
police to revoke it, which would have
closed The Boat forever.
A report to go before the Council
states:
"Gateshead Council wishes to see
this area [the Quayside] develop and
establish itself as a family-friendly
destination. Therefore the proportion
of space given over to bars,
nightclubs and other "vertical
drinking" establishments should be
strictly limited."
S tory C ontin ued on p a ge 3
ft
Consniracy
theories
uncovered
PAGE 2/UNION NEWS
Hie Courier
Heoday 25Ui April 2005
AMT> W TR O D O C W ft..
^Courier
EDITORIAL TEAM
EDITOR
F ra n N a fs h
edit8r.unlon@ncl.ac.uk
NEWS
StoVose
&
Rebecca
Wright
FEATURES
Ed Sawyer
&
AnnaHowey
■
fjfc i
TECHIE
TotnGofinan
1
iw':** ■
PROOFREADER
Caroline Callaghan
TV EDITOR:
Chris ChapRiaa
CHIEF REPORTER:
Phil McGowan
SALES & ADVERTISING CONTACT
Owen Parry
GRAD BALLS OF FIRE
By IZZY PALMER
THE ANNUAL swansong of the
University’s proud third years, the
2005 Graduation Ball, will be held at
St. James’ Park on 10th June, with a
champagne reception in the Quad
prior to the event, it’s been
announced.
Dress will simply be chic glamour, think of
a night at the Oscars, complete with red
carpet and elegant decor to match. This
year's Grad Ball promises to be the
biggest and best party ever, giving you the
chance to say goodbye in fantastic style,
and to give friends something to really
remember you by, for better or worse!
Grad Ball 2005 tickets will go on sale in
the next few weeks and will be sold in the
Bassment. However, the official sale date
is being kept underwraps, and will be
announced a week before the tickets
actually go on sale.
The Union has
managed to make 2,000 tickets available more than last year - but be warned, keep
a look-out and get there early, as last year
saw massive queues outside the Union,
with tickets selling out in less than a day.
Grad Ball 2005 will feature big-name DJ’s
(still to be confirmed) and loads of fun
By RACHEL MURRAY
THE GATE has plugged into student
radio!
NSR, the voice of students over the
airwaves, will soon be spreading a lot
further across the city, as part of a new
sponsorship deal unveiled this week.
The Gate, one of Newcastle’s biggest
student hangouts, is now the official
sponsor of Newcastle Student Radio,
which broadcasts to 35,000 students
across both universities, via the Global
and MLK cafes, as welt as online 24 hours
a day.
NSR will provide regular live broadcasts
into the venue as part of The Gate's
commitment to put student radio on the
Newcastle map and, as Jude Leitch,
marketing Manager of The Gate sees it,
NSR was the obvious choice for them to
promote.
“We look forward to helping students,
especially the freshers who'll be coming
into the city in September, to settle into
their new environment. Students are a big
part of our market, and we are really
pleased to help out the students and their
Union.”
The 12-month deal ensures that NSR will
be able to expand both its audience and
membership in the forthcoming academic
year. Martin Bayly, NSR Station Manager,
believes that the deal is down to the
continued hard work and dedication of the
members:
T h e sponsorship is a great bonus for the
station and gives NSR financial security
for the foreseeable future. Student radio
is an asset to both Newcastle and
Northumbria Universities and I am
delighted that such a prominent
entertainment venue has identified the
station's strengths and given us valuable
money to improve the station further.”
The cash injection will pay for the much-
needed upgrade of CD players and other
studio equipment, allowing the station to
sound more professional and to get the
bail rolling on wiring up the station in more
of the Union buildings' catering and social
rooms.
Newcastle Student Radio is a media
organisation run by students for students.
Elections are being held on the
Wednesday 26th April for all positions for
the 2005/2006 academic year, if you
would like to be considered for a position,
please contact Martin Bayly or Rachel
Murray
immediately
at
stationmanager@nsrfm.com.
A
NSR
EXECUTIVE OFFICER
ELECTION
n
The Courier is printed by Newcastle Chronicle &
Journal Ltd, Groat Market, Newcastle upon
Tyne NE1 1ED. Telephone 0191 232 750.
man responsible for heading up the Grad
Ball team, told The Courier.
“We are really really excited about this
year’s Ball, it really promises to be the
biggest and best ever. We've made a real
effort to make sure there are more tickets
this year, but we expect a very high
demand so keep your eyes peeled or
check www.unionsociety.co.uk for the
announcement of the release date for
tickets. See you there!”
«S£
GATE OPEN FOR
STUDENT RADIO
The Courier is the independent newspaper of the Union Society at
the University of Newcastle upon Tyne.
Established in 1948, The Courier is published weekly during term time.
The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of the Courier
and the individual contributors. No part of this newspaper may be
reproduced without prior permission of the Editor.
games. Also, the University’s Chancellor,
Lord Patten has been invtied to join in the
action. With a wide range of entertainment
they’ll be something to cater for all tastes
and if gambling away what’s left of your
overdraft isn’t on your to-do list, then you
could perhaps try your luck at the safer
option of the grand raffle, which promises
to have great prizes up for grabs.
Commenting, Tom Gorman, the Union
Society's Communications Officer and the
1union
election!
Is there more that the Union could do in a particular area of its
activity? Would you like to run a Union project next year? The
Executive Committee is interested in hearing from students who
would like to run for the Executive Officer position. The election will
probably be on 13th May but if you're worried about work and
exams - don't as we can work around you! Contact
editor.union@ncl.ac.uk now for more info - before it's too late!
PAGE 3 / NEWS & COMMENT
Sail Away?
CONTINUED FROM
PAGE ONE...
The area has enjoyed something of a
renaissance over recent years, with the
opening of the BALTIC art gallery, the Sage
music
centre,
and
the
Hilton
NewcastleGateshead - all of which have all
served to transform the quays, countering
the area’s slide into disrepair during the
1970’s and 80’s.
Now the Council want the rest of the
Quayside to be an area of homes, shops and
restaurants with a family-friendly' feel, a
future vision which seemingly does not
include the famous Boat, or indeed Naval
Reserve building HMS Calliope, which also
occupies prime riverside space.
Absolute Leisure Ltd., who own the Boat,
look like they’ve got a real fight on their
hands, but are determined to stay. The
company’s Managing Director, Tony Knox,
told the Evening Chronicle last week:
“We have plans to considerably re-invest in
the Tuxedo Princess so that it will continue to
be one of Tyneside's best-loved landmarks,
and as such we have no plans to move from
our present location.”
Mr. Knox continued:
"Absolute Leisure put Gateshead on the
leisure and tourism map long before anyone
else. The Tuxedo Princess has been an
attraction, not only locally but nationally and
internationally, to visitors for more than 20
years.
T h e company invested in the area and set
up not only its flagship club but also its
headquarters in Gateshead at a time when
the Quayside was virtually derelict.
"Gateshead Council seems to have no
regard for the loyalty that Absolute Leisure
has shown over the past two decades and
numerous attempts over the past five years
to discuss with the Council the future of The
Boat have met with no response.’’
A representative of Absolute Leisure also
told The Courier.
“There is nothing wrong, The Boat is still
going strong."
Northumbria Police tried to shut the floating
nightclub after a catalogue of violent
incidents occured linked to binge drinking,
including the deaths of two local men, Tony
Dockerty and David Webb.
This led to Northumbria Police's attempts
to have the club's licence to serve alcohol
revoked. However, they agreed to allow the
tub to stay open after the management
agreed to scrap the offer, to the outrage of
the dead mens' families.
Northumbria Police declined to comment to
The Courier, on the grounds that this current
attempt to close The Boat isn't directly
concerned with policing.
Now, the club's management face a
renewed threat to its future from Gateshead
Council, whose draft brief for the
redevelopment of this section of riverside
ground doesn't include the Royal Navy base
or the Tuxedo Princess.
Although the exact date of the
commencement
of
these
proposed
developments remains unclear, John Devlin,
Director of Development and Enterprise for
Gateshead Council, told The Chronicle:
"We expect to be marketing the site in June
this year and hope to begin looking at
expressions of interest from developers by
late summer. The intention is, if possible, to
select a developer late 2005 or early in
2006.”
So, with the tension between The Boat and
HMS Calliope and Gateshead Council set to
come to a head, could The Boat be about to
make way for new developments on the
increasingly upmarket Quayside, and sail off
into the Tyneside sunset for the very last
time?
HAVE YOUR SAY!
Email us your views on The Boat’s
possible closure to
courier.news@nd.ac.uk
END OF AN ERA?
CHRIS STEPHENSON gives us his
view on The Boat’s potentially perilous
situation - and offers an alternative that
he feels could work...
However, the fact remains that if you’re a
student at this university, you’ve probably
visited it at least once, and it was probably
when you were a first year. It doesn't matter
whether your memories of your nights there
are of glorious, meaningless partying as a
fresher, or otherwise, the fact remains that
you do remember it - it hasn't merged into
that one generic night out everyone will carry
in their memories of university. It was The
Night You Went to the Boat. The place is
legendary, the famous photo of the Tyne
Bridge et cetera just wouldn’t look the same
without it.
Closing The Boat will help solve binge
drinking related problems on the Quayside,
and probably stop a lot of people getting hurt
as well.
But negotiating with the
management, who have shown themselves
to be open to negotiation, can also achieve
the same effect - rates of alcohol-related
violence will certainly fall with the end of the
‘all you can drink’ offer. Surely closing The
Boat would deny future years o f freshers an
invaluable experience o f an iconic part o f
their new home.
- DISCLAIMER All opinions expressed in the
opinion pieceabove are those of
the individual writer, and are not
neccessarily held by The Courier
or the Union Society.
Newcastle student takes on Anne Robinson on
ICE QUEEN Anne Robinson got a
nasty shock recently when she came
face-to-face with a Newcastle student
on ‘The Weakest Link’.
Third year Naval Architecture student,
Clifford Mace, featured on the show
broadcast early last month duing the Easter
holidays, and visibly amused Anne with his
ice-cool wit and quick responses to her jibes,
in addition to his attempts to chat her up!
“I don’t know if she was a bit suprised by
that”, explained Clifford. “I certainly didn't
mean it though!”
Clifford, 21, who was recently elected as
the Union's Convenor of Debates for the
third year running, reached the last three
before falling victim to tactical voting from the
other two contestants.
When the voting was revealed, Anne
Robinson asked the other contestants:
“Do you realize you’re getting rid of the best
player?”, to which they replied “yes”. So,
after answering questions on everything
from escalators to elephants, Clifford's brave
bid for the cash jackpot was over. But was
he bitter?
“No, not really. OK, I could have won some
money, but if you go into it with the sole
intention of winning money, you’re not really
entering into the spirit of the game.”
Robinson constantly referred to her new­
found friend as ‘Little Clifford’, and quizzed
him on a range of university-related subjects
when not grilling contestants in the general
knowledge-based rounds.
For example, when asked if he had been
taught how to make a ship in a bottle on his
Naval Architecture, Clifford offered to take up
the matter with the University authorities!
“I didn't really mind her constant jokes
about my course.”, said Clifford.
“I was told before I went on that everything
she says is just for show, she doesn't
actually mean any of it at all.
“I was fairly nervous though, I think it’s only
natural to be when you've never done
tittle Eye on the
O K } Locals
Now, let’s face a couple of facts here.
By PHIL McGOWAN
When I started writing this piece, I
had to admit that I don’t like The
Boat, and wouldn’t have been sorry Pair proved a cut above the rest!
That was the headline greeting readers of the
to see it go.
ACE MACE
By STU VOSE
NEWS EDITOR
T IE C M IIII
Mtnday 25th April 2005
The Weakest Link’
something like that before.
“OK, I didn’t win the money, but I’m not
going to be losing any sleep over it.”
Chronicle this week, who were no doubt eager to
read the thrilling story of two stylists (that's
hairdressers to you and I) who won an award. Slow
news week?
Chronicle: It’s not like them to get carried
away!
Your favourite local daily heralded the ‘Venice of the
North- East' when it outlined plans for a canal-based
sightseeing tour to an open cast mine. Not a terrible
idea you’d think - although not a great one either but then they tell us that this canal hasn’t even been
built yet! Don't panic though, despite the Chronicle’s
in depth report on the plan it is still just at ‘the ideas
stage'. At the risk of sounding repetitive: Slow news
week?
Journal pundits, I salute you
‘School plan ends in tiers’ was the headline the ‘J’
pages ran with for their story on the end of three-tier
education in the region. Does it get any better than
that? Well yes, it does .quite frankly.
Worst headline/story/paper ever?
'Come along, watch the birds of prayer' was one
headline that stared at me from the pages of the
Journal this week. What it meant, however, was a
mystery for the full five seconds before I could be
bothered reading that Christian bird-watchers will be
flocking to the Northumberland coastline for a new
series of ‘orni-theological’ breaks.
Get it
‘theological’. Seriously though guys: Slow news
week?
What an arse!
No, I’m not talking about Lee Bowyer, instead this is
the story of a roll of toilet paper the size of a car
which caught fire at a factory last week, in a blaze
which took more than eight hours to put out. There
are so many jokes that could be made with this one
so Nil leave it up to you to. Rolls-Royce anyone?
Sorry, I couldn't help myself..
Sunday Sun still in shock
The region's local Sunday paper is obviously still in
shock at the death of a local comic, as shown by this
report last week: Veteran comic Bobby Thompson
has been told to film a new ad for a DVD of his
famous stage show... 17 years after his death’. I’m
sorry to break it to them, but if he’s been dead 17
years then they can’t actually TELL him anything.
Those poor deluded journos.
That’s it for this week, I’m far too busy and
important to write any more - alright I admit
it, Neighbours is on in five minutes but that
still counts as busy! If I hang around until
Murd&r She Wrote, then I’m being lazy.
Fact me now! email your randomness to:
littleeyeonthelocals@hotmail.com
Clifford does his bit for democracy
+
_r
+
PAGE 4/NIWS
By BEN DUCKWORTH
IF ANY students have actually noticed, we’re
having a general election in less than two weeks
time.
So far it has been traditional issues of crime, health,
immigration that have dominated and students’ issues of topup fees and debt have barely been mentioned.
For the record, both the Conservatives and the Liberal
Democrats would scrap tuition fees and top-up fees while
Labour would obviously maintain them.
So far, the campaign has been pretty boring, no major
scandal as yet, but as things hot up as the election date
nears then hopefully it will get more exciting.
Here's a brief rundown of each major political party’s
campaign.
“Britain forward not back* is Labour's message
for this general election. They have been bu sy!
highlighting their success with the economy,■
although the timing of the MG Rover collapseJ
was unfortunate. Tony Biair has also b e e n !
constantly telling everyone that hospital waiting I
lists are reducing and pledging to reduce crime. I
Labour and the Conservatives are battling it out I
to see who can produce the toughest rhetoric on I
border controls.
However, when interviewed by Jeremy Paxman I
on the BBC, Tony Blair refused to give any figures I
on illegal immigrant numbers which is odd A I
party that professes to be tough on those who
enter our country illegally but can't actually say how many
there is the message from Labour.
The press has been enjoying highlighting how few Labour
parliamentary candidates literature includes Tony Blair; could
he be an electoral embarrassment?
To the delight of everyone, John Prescott is back doing
what he does best; embarrassing the Labour party. In 2001
he punched an egg throwing protestor, now he is telling
a
x
:
m
p
m
H
■
m
m
m
-
f
polls indicate that this is
not improving their
popularity enough to
make significant gains in
the election.
immigration has
dominated the
Conservative campaign They ail have their eyes on the
quotas and tb quit the UN refugee convention. Whatever
your view on immigration; the Tories have banged on about
it so much it has successfully overshadowed their other
policies.
“Are you thinking what we’re thinking?” is their message but
not enough people do to ensure a return to power.
T h e Real Alternative* is how the Liberal Democrats would
like to be seen by the electorate. Their most high profile
policy is the replacement of council tax with local income tax.
This policy has the benefit that it is more proportional to your
income. Therefore it should be a fairer tax.
However, Charles Kennedy was completely caught out by
a question from a reporter on how much you would have to
earn before paying more. He managed to sound like he
didn't understand his own policy which as leader was a PR
disaster.
This was only two days after the birth of his son so it was
understandable he was tired, but there is no sympathy in
politics.
The Lib Dems are also planning 50% tax on earnings over
£100, 000 and 10,000 more police. This general election has
to see significant gains if the Lib Dems are going to maintain
their ambition of the becoming the main party of opposition.
Britain’s first-past-the-post electoral system means that
smaller parties always struggle to get representation.
With the advent of the Internet, there is no excuse for those
disillusioned with politics not to give their policies a look. The
■ BBC website has all the
links.
Finally, the best quote
from the elections is not
from a politician but from
Noel Gallagher on MTV don’t vote Conservative
because “Phil Collins is
threatening to come back
and live here.
“And let’s face it, none of
us want that.’
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"TWo Jags" Prescott knows how to put irritating journalists in
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The Conservatives have the tricky task of being centre-right
white avoiding identical
policies to New Labour.
They reckon that tax
cuts are a good idea.
Unfortunately most of
the British electorate are I
intelligent enough to I
realise that something I
has to give when cutting I
tax and it’s normally I
services.
The Tories have been I
busy trying to convince!
us that it can b e f l
achieved by cutting]!
bureaucracy but opinion!
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PAGE 5/NEWS
STUDENT DIES IN
BUS CRASH
Friends mourn death of popular
Chemistry student
By BEN DUCKWORTH_________ tribute to the Chemistry student: “Richard was
a hard-working, dedicated and lively student
who was very popular with staff and his fellow
students.
“His untimely death is a tragedy and our
hearts go out to his family at this time."
Richard's silver Vauxhall Astra was found a
Richard Hyde was knocked over by a bus on mile from the scene of the accident in West
March 21st in Stanley, County Durham. An View Gardens, Stanley, by police officers on
inquest into his
Tuesday night. It had not
death has been
been tampered with and
"Richard was a hard-working,
adjourned because
there were no signs of
it remains unclear
mechanical defects.
dedicated and lively student...
why the Chemistry
Richard was hit as he
His untimely death is a tragedy.
student had driven
tried to cross the A693 in
there from his
* . l r •
r l i < ii
i c•
N e w K y o , n e a r S ta n le y ,
Dr John Em ngton, School of Natural Sciences j u s , a f t e r 6 40 a m
,a s t
Jesmond
Dene
home.
Monday. Police assume
Richard left the
that after leaving his car
student home he shared with his girlfriend at Richard walked through Stanley town centre
around 10 p.m. the day before his death. The to the A693.
police believe that he may have spent the
Residents of West View Gardens, Stanley
night in his car before leaving it on March noticed Richard's car and were puzzled as to
21st.
what it doing in the street.
Richard, originally from Sheemess in Kent,
Andrea Smith, 28, said: “I didn't see
suffered multiple injuries in the accident and anybody in it. Why he would come hear to
was taken to the University Hospital of North leave his car is a real mystery.
Durham, in Durham City, where he was
“We are fairly out of the way and it is difficult
formally pronounced dead.
to imagine anybody without local knowledge
Dr John Errington, Head of Newcastle choosing to drive here”.
University’s School of Natural Sciences, paid
A NEWCASTLE UNIVERSITY student
was tragically killed in a road accident
at the beginning o f the Easter
holidays.
T H E C O D III|
Monday 25th M ill 2005
COURAGEOUS
BATTLE
Student is bailed as he continues
fight to avoid deportation
By RACHEL MURRAY
A NIGERIAN NEWCASTLE student
threatened w ith deportation has
been granted bail o f £3,000
following his arrest in January.
Biochemistry
student
Courage
Idiagbonya was forced to flee from his
native home after being suspected as the
leader of a student rebellion against the
Nigerian government.
He escaped to England where he
managed to enrol on a Biochemistry
degree at Newcastle, but was arrested in
January after government officials
realised he was here illegally.
His bail hearing took place over the
Easter break where a bail of £3,000 was
agreed.
His friend Christine rescued Idiagbonya
by footing the bill, and the pair are
currently living at her house in Heaton.
Welfare Officer for the Union, Luci
Hargreaves, told The Courier that she
hopes that the final outcome of the case
will be positive.
Luci said: “Hopefully the courts will look
sympathetically at Courage's case so
that he can be granted asylum and
continue his studies here at Newcastle
University and continue with his
Biochemistry degree.”
Courage faces a life of torture at the
hands of a government-sponsored
parliamentary group if he is forced back
to Nigeria, as punishment for his
suspected involvement in a student
rebellion which was crushed by the
government.
Dr Jennifer Toomey, a Research
associate in Immunology and who knows
Courage well, has tirelessly campaigned
since his arrest at the beginning of the
year to keep him in the country, fearing
for his life if he is sent back.
His court hearing on whether his
asylum claim will be granted will take
place in the coming weeks.
Look out for further updates in The
Courier.
AWARD-WINNING POET DIES
By PAMELA TARBET_________
THE
AWARD-WINNING
poet,
playwright, novelist and teacher in
Creative W riting at the University,
Julia Darling died on A pril 13th from
breast cancer at the age o f 48.
As the appointed Fellow in Creative
Writing and Health within Newcastle
University’s English department, Julia
played an active role in poetry readings
organised by the school alongside other
writers.
Collapses in Public
Places (2003) and most
recently, Apology for
Absence
( 2 0 0 4 )
p^Te tnJr “Julia was an inspiration in her s h o w e d
collections
ability to enliven any topic”
Darling writing
w e r e
launched
on campus and have been enjoyed by many
through her honest and optimistic creativity,
which both entertained and moved readers
and audiences.
Julia's literary career has been extremely
successful, as she achieved major
recognition in 2002 by the Northern Rock
Newcastle since 1980, which features very
much within her works.
As local readers will know, several of the
famous and not so
famous Newcastle
landmarks
are
brought to life in
poems
and
novels.
Julia was also
project fellow for
the Royal Literary
Fund at Newcastle
University and the
founder member
of
Operating
Theatre,
a
University-based
group of writers,
actors, educators
and health care
professionals in
Julia Darling
which she used
writing and drama
21/08/56 - 13/04/05
to assist people
with
learning
Writer’s Award.
Her acclaimed first novel, Crocodile Soup,
was longlisted for the Orange Prize in 1988
and her most recent
novel, The Taxi Driver’s
Daughter, was also
longlisted for the Man
Booker Prize.
Her two collections of
poetry,
Sudden
about
her
illness, which
was both an inspiration
to her readers and as
she said herself, “poetry
gave me a voice to
express the comedy and
tragedy of my illness.’’
Darling has lived in
about health.
The power of her words and creativity were
an inspiration to patients and readers,
providing hope and comedy through a
traditionally dark topic: ‘Be late. Be sordid.
Eat six pies, since Beneath your feet/ wonns
aren’t worrying.’
Her many plays are to be published this
summer under the title Eating the Elephant
and Other Plays, whilst one of the last things
she worked on was the editing of an
anthology, Poetry Cure with Cynthia Fuller.
Professor Linda Anderson and Dr Bill
Herbert, of the School of English Literature,
Language and Linguistics, offered a tribute
to Julia: “The School of English is deeply
saddened to hear of the death of Julia
Darling.
“She was an extremely popular and much
valued colleague.
“She was an inspiration in her ability to
enliven any topic within her writing and has
contributed greatly to the creativity in the
School of English and indeed the North
East.”
+
PAGE 6/NEWS
THE COURIER
Monday 25th April 2005
SWANSEA STUDENTS
SUE OWN UNI
By ISABEL PALMER
SWANSEA STUDENTS are suing
their own University following the
suspension of Philosophy lecturer
Colwyn Williamson.
They have claimed that their education
had suffered since Mr. Williamson was
suspended over a month ago after
allegations that he 'hacked' into University
computers.
However the University are adamant that
the students were receiving professional
teaching from experienced staff in his
absence, and that their studies would not
be affected by any of the closures.
Last year Swansea University announced
it would close four departments - Sociology,
Anthropology,
Philosophy,
and
undergraduate teaching at the Centre for
Development
Studies.
Professor
Williamson was a fiece critic of the closure
of any educational departments, including
his own.
Williamson has been off work following
his suspected ‘hacking’ into University
computers, and he has since received a
police caution for an offence under the
Computer and Misuse Act. He has
remained off work pending the outcome of
the University's own investigation.
Meanwhile
Professor
Williamson’s
students submitted their lawsuit to
Swansea's County Court, which has been
prepared by law student Jamie Insole who
has also pledged to represent his fellow
students if it comes before a court.
The Swansea students are alleging that
the University has failed to provide
adequate cover in the wake of Mr
Williamson’s absence and furthermore
have failed to properly address students'
complaints.
Additionally the students voiced their
concerns about the final-year examinations
as Mr Williamson would not be around to
set and mark the papers on the lectures he
had given.
Paul Meehan, a third-year Philosophy
student, said: "Colwyn Williamson is a very
good and competent lecturer.
"Basically the stop-gap measures that
have been put in place are inadequate.
"We have gone through the threat of
closure to our department for the last year
and a half and the university had promised
it would not affect our degree.
"We just feel that the University has let us
down by failing to provide for us."
Paul added: "We put forward a measure
where Colwyn Williamson would set and
mark the papers but that has been
^rejected."
Head of the school at Swansea
University, Professor Noel Thompson, said
in response: "As in many higher education
institutions, teaching staff absences occur
for numerous reasons, for example illness,
maternity leave or where there is evidence
of a criminal offence.
"We have ensured that those students
studying philosophy at the University have
been provided with professional teaching
for the continuation of their studies."
"In this case, I am surprised and
disappointed that this initial action by the
students has been taken as I have only
been approached by one student
regarding the teaching cover provided".
STUDENT FINANCIAL SUPPORT
H e you expenenctig nrtanoaf dDcUUes
due to unforeseen circumstances’
ForflM confldenM advice afrout
oflgMMy contact:
Is your UK Student Loan not enougn to
cover you' basic bvtng costs?
umversay student w elfare Service a t
Are you a tfhal
r a yyear
e v student
Kuden with a
smaserUK Student Loan?
Union Society Student Advice Cenfre at
You may bo •llglbl* to appty now foe
<
university ewweare Support Officer at
awef tm NMawtig mttrmmun
5tAfciu4<2A&ixB&Bd(KUK. i*
funds:
Acco m to Learning Fund-U K
Students onty
* FtnancM Assistance Fund - non
UK EU & international Students
CMIdcareFund
Student wevarewetnte at
www nciac uktttudent-support/
Afpn»au<n fsrwe for t o Funds ars
anMMoflrMi R s f M a i R m im m i—
6 Kensington Terrace orthe Student
Advice Centre
-H
MOLLY SCOOPS
LOLLY
Molly limbers up for the outdoor show that helped to clinch her
prize of free rent for a year
By STU VOSE
NEWS EDITOR
THE VOTES have been counted and the
results are in. And it’s good news!
First-year Archaeology and Ancient History
student Molly Crossthwaite, who engaged in a
series of mad acts in an attempt to win free rent
for a year, courtesy of Virgin Mobile, has
emerged victorious.
Molly, 20, came in the top ten in an online poll,
thus claiming free rent for a year for her and
three lucky housemates. Having successfully
escaped the rent, what is Molly going to spend
her new-found wealth on?
“I’m hopefully going to get my diver’s licence,
travel, and just generally try not to get into debt.
I might have a massive house party as well to
celebrate!”
Molly was set tasks by Virgin Mobile, which
resulted in her wearing a cardboard box to St.
James' Park on a matchday, and of course the
infamous Eric Prydz dance routine outside the I
Union. Did she not find all this action'
embarassing?
“We were going to do the dance at Solution,
but the lads bottled out, it was more
embarassing for the lads, I think!
I was
embarassed in a way, but it was fun and all for a
good cause!”
So Molly’s all set for a rent-free year. “Watch
out for the big house party”, she says. This
reporter feels we haven't seen the last of Molly.
£4.5M HEALTH
BOOST FOR UNI
By CHERYL CAIRA
NEWCASTLE
UNIVERSITY
have
combined with the Newcastle Hospitals
NHS Trust to open a groundbreaking
new research centre.
The joint £4.5m project, named the Clinical
Research Facility (CRF), has opened in the
Royal Victoria Infirmary, and will place the North
East firmly on the map as one of the leaders in
medical research.
It will include a highly skilled staff of leading
research professionals, and will devote its top of
the range facilities to discovering new
treatments for a variety of conditions, such as
diabetes, arthritis, stroke, haematology and
neuromuscular diseases.
Areas of the facility, like the Immunotherapy
Unit, which deals with arthritis, will give patients
the chance to experience the latest treatments
being researched.
Professor Mark Walker, who does research on
diabetes in the University's School of Clinical
Medical Sciences, and is now co-director of the
new facility, commented: “The opening of the
CRF brings the North East to the forefront of
clinical research, and will attract more research
funding into the region from government and \
charity research organisations.
“In addition, it is attracting a lot of interest from
the pharmaceutical industry, which is keen to
engage with us, knowing that we can provide
everything required to cany out full-scale clinical
drug trials."
PAGE 7/COMMENT
THE COURIER
Monday 25th April 2005
YES TO NUS?
Following the recent NUS Annual Conference, Editor___
FRAN NAISH contemplates its success.
ON MARCH 14 *h, we as the student
body from Newcastle University, once
again voted to remain affiliated to the
National Union of Students (NUS). By
re-affiliating we get to keep our NUS
cards, we as a Union are able to take
advantage of various experienced
advisors
and,
perhaps
most
importantly, we are given the privilege
of forking out approximately £44,000
per year.
As a member of the Union, we are permitted
to elect nine students each year to attend the
NUS Annual Conference, an event aimed at
making policy which affects students and as
one of this year’s delegates I was initially
excited about representing students at
Newcastle University by speaking out on issues
which affect us. However, along with several of
our delegates, I felt more than a little
disillusioned by the whole experience.
Perhaps the most striking disappointment was
the disproportionately large amount of time
spent discussing secondary (yet important)
issues such as the war in Iraq, rather than
primary student issues such as education,
student health care and racism on campus.
Like many students across the UK, I would
agree that the war should never have
happened, and that it should be regarded as a
priority in Government discussions. But is it
really one of the most serious issues affecting
students in the UK? Of course, key student
issues like the above were debated but it
seemed a shame that delegates’ time was
wasted giving a platform to students with their
own agendas.
Speaking of agendas, the presence of political
factions at Annual Conference was blindingly
overwhelming. Many students' unions across
the country ban party politics from any of their
policy making and I think there is good reason
for this. The party politics at the conference
resulted in factions often voting on mass,
sometimes even guided by political guests on
the balcony, and students (or ex-students some of the National Executive Committee
haven't been in full-time education for quite a
long time) seemingly running in elections to
further their political careers.
I would argue that political factions are far
from representative of the student body as most
students are either undecided about their
persuasion or simply fed up of party political
bitching. As student delegates, we should be
voting for our students, not for middle aged
men (and women) in suits who often don’t
support our needs. However, NUS National
Secretary, James Lyold, fairly points out that
banning anything from the conference would be
dangerous, for it enables hacks who know the
NUS constitution inside out to abuse the
system. He agrees that factions forcing
delegates to vote in a particular way is wrong
but suggests that although some students are
highly political, the majority of student leaders
got to the top by themselves.
Lloyd, in response to my suggestion that too
much time
was spent on certain issues,
suggested that due to the lack of time at
Conference, students who believe very strongly
in one particular issue become confrontational
with one another and that if there was more
time, more delegates would be happy debate
everything.
I also asked Lloyd whether he thought free
education was unrealistic given the number of
people now going on to higher education and
whether he felt it was right for less well
educated tax payers to have to pay for our often
unessential degrees. He commented that free
education has to be our ideal and anything else
might mean “that only the privileged could
learn”. He also pointed out that the University
experience is about more that academic
education. He said, “University allows us
thinking space and allows us to develop cultural
richness. I literally studied a Mickey Mouse
degree (Arts, Music and Entertainment Industry
Management) and now I’m running the
[National] Union. It’s a huge experience of
growing up.”
Newcastle Students’ Union Communications
Officer, Tom Gorman, unlike myself, was not a
first time delegate this year.
“NUS has come a long way in the last few
years. Lots of the political infighting has been
eradicated and at this last conference in March,
I felt students really got a chance to discuss the
policy and subjects that mattered to them. I
believe that students should be able to discuss
issues which are important to them - more
students protested against the Iraq war than
against top-up fees.
“This conference discussed policy on higher
education funding, interfaith activity, NUS
cards, anti-discrimination work, diversity in
sport, keeping Wednesday afternoons free,
NUS reform, maintenance grants, access and
widening participation, course closures, free
prescriptions and condoms for students, .the
list goes on!
So it seems that even t h o u g h ^ ^ ^ ^
Conference dissatisfied
many of us,
least it is
improving
- definitely «
a
good \
thing. It’s a
shame that so
many of this
year's first time
delegates
will
have left feeling
disheartened
about the whole *
process but at least
future students may
not have the same
experience.
And
I
-suppose at least we all
left feeling inspired to do
something, even if it was
only to get rid of the crap.
The conference did bring ^
some things to look forward
to. Kat Fletcher was re-elected as NUS
president, which no doubt will mean another
year of change. Fletcher is a powerful speaker
and a great leader and I am sure her influence
will continue to be very positive. Also, the
elections for the NUS Officers were also less
political than usual with all independent
S 3
'x’cV
rasa__________________
candidates
being elected as
fulltime members of the
National Executive Committee
(NEC).
Sadly, the end of Conference was seriously
overshadowed by the resignations of NEC
members Luciana Berger and Mitch Simmons
and Steering Committee member Jonny
Warren, due to allegations that the Union’s
leadership was “turning a blind eye” to antisemitic leaflets being distributed at conference
and a series of rows on campuses throughout
the year.
And Hit
u ln n t r i Aft***
NUS Executive 2005-6
FULLTIM E
PART TIME
NATIONAL PRESIDENT
BLOCK OF TWELVE
Kot Fletcher
(in order of election)
Wes Streeting
Peter Leary
Jessica Kosmin
Flick Cox
Judith Niven
W ill Page
Derfel Owen
Stephen Brown
Jamal El-Shayyal
Suzie W ylie
Daniel Randall
Dan Chilcott
NATIONAL SECRETARY
Gemma Tumelty
NATIONAL TREASURER
Joe Rukin
VP FURTHER EDUCATION
EUie Russell
VP EDUCATION
Julian Nicholds
VP WELFARE
Veronica King
THE COURIER
Manday 25th M ill 2005
PAGE 8/FEATURES
+
PUTTING POVERTY
IN THE PAST ■
The issue of third world development has attracted a range of supporters, from politicians Make Poverty History
week, MARK GEORGE DRYBROUGH analyses the real issues that continue to ensure world poverty.
N HISTORIC campaign was
launched this year by Nelson
Mandela in which he declared that
we could all work together to
achieve a society without want. In doing
this a whole range of people want to
highlight the failures of present economic
strategy.
A
At a recent debate organised by One World
North East held at Newcastle University, Hilary
Benn MP spoke about the government's vision
of International development. His message
Offered a synopsis of government thinking and
indicated
that
development
is
an
interdependent endeavour. This is a promising
opening fanfare for all those involved in
campaigns to end misery around the world. But
behind his fine words, is there any substance?
Hilary believes that an era of ignorance has
disappeared to reveal what he calls 'the big
challenge' of what to do about poverty and
injustice. Labour has campaigned since their
inception to end poverty, but the main problem
now is how we can combat underdevelopment
and expand social development in the third
world. Some argue that progress has already
been made with statistics such as three
quarters of the world population now being able
to read is testimony to this.
Hilary Benn believes three strategies are
required: 1) A continuing increase in aid. 2) A
shift in balance of trade towards the producer in
the developing world. 3) Finally multilateral
debt service relief.
The activity of many Non-Govemmental
Organisations (NGOs) have highlighted the
development problems and questioned
government records on poverty reduction. The
imposed schemes are rarely accountable to
local people and often provide limited or no
benefits to the poor; for example, dam
construction is a lucrative scheme for large
construction companies but often forces local
people from their land. NGOs’ philosophy is to
educate and raise awareness; they believe that
the involvement of people in decisions is where
the power lies to transform and it is a counter
weight to the corruption of power when it is held
by a few. It is a campaign of utmost importance
to the future of our society and has been placed
on the agenda by the plight of those billions of
people earning less than £1 a day in a world
where for the first time since the 1970s lifespan
is decreasing and absolute poverty and
inequality are rising.
Recently a coalition of groups was founded
called Make Poverty History which attempts to
pursue active questioning of policy on the
streets and in every work place in order to
pressure the existing institutions to recognise
the reality of poverty. It is mobilising people to
oppose the G8 with an alternative plan. Unlike
the government they believe that people should
take control. Supported by the prestigious
figures such as Nelson Mandela, they insist
that the world's governments should listen to
their criticism. To shape a strategy for future
relations, the question needs to be asked what causes poverty?
Most of the blame lies in the argument of the
free market, which is sucking the resources out
of the developing world and producing no real
social development apart from massive
industrial bases to manufacture cheap
products which are then resold on the markets
of Europe, North America and Japan, while
being beyond the purchasing power of those
who produce them. Hilary Benn argued,
however, that investment in new plants will
provide jobs and income for the inhabitants of
the rapidly industrialising nations and lead to
social benefits in the long run.
The International Monetary Fund (IMF),
World Trade Organisation (WTO) and G8 are
the true controllers of money and decide the
way development happens. It is these
institutions, however, who have denied the
Ghanaian government the right to protect its
tomato producers from cheap imports from the
—
NEWCASTLE UNIVERSITY’S
MAKE POVERTY HISTORY WEEK
APRIL 30 - MAY 5 2005
E.U and U.S. Without this protection the
massive resources of the European and
American producers are used to swamp the
market with artificially cheap tinned tomatoes,
a strategy known as 'dumping' by economists.
Small producers have no chance in this
competition.
Government strategies for development are
ideologically biased; many of the aid packages
have been linked to the developing nations
selling state industries such as water, gas,
electricity and national companies to large
multinationals who then profit by charging too
much for the poor to benefit from the services.
So the number of people benefiting from these
services has declined and those who
administered these industries have been made
unemployed by the new boss leading to a
reduction in wages, pensions and a collapse of
the economies of the developing nations.
Privatisation is not sharing wealth but
concentrating it.
The policies we are witnessing are a form of
social control which is wrecking the economies
and spreading poverty. In Malawi, the WTO
stopped the government paying their health
workers more because it would lead to
inflation, a monetarist response which has
increased unemployment throughout Africa
and lead to deskilling, as people leave to seek
work in western health services. The
government was also forced to sell all their
grain supplies or face IMF sanctions in order to
sen/ice its debt repayments; this was at the
time of a famine. A similar pattern is emerging
with teachers' salaries in Mozambique.
The reason for these restrictions is not that
the IMF and WTO want to aid development but
that they dislike the public sector, a
'communist' artefact in the modem era. An
ideology of anti-communism is used to justify
the takeover of countries forcing them to
become reliant on western industry so that
western stock holders can control everything.
This is what certain thinkers in the WTO/IMF
believes is a form of "Social Darwinism". This
philosophy is one which declares that all state
intervention is parasitic and weakens the
society. With this type of philosophy, only the
tough and ruthless will survive.
The alternative is to present a strong front in
an attempt to organise. Ordinary people are
planning to travel to Edinburgh on July 2 to be
part of the mobilisation to confront the G8
meeting at Gleneagles with a different agenda.
This agenda is one in which pensions, a free
health service and free education are for all.
Water and sanitation are a necessity which the
state provides for everyone. Political rights are
not some auxiliary process to the economic but
the precursor to development. It is through
active involvement that change is won. That we
can shape our own future alongside the other
billions of dispossessed is something that
many have begun to realise. Now itfs time for
others to follow suit.
April 30th, Castle Leazes: Hunger Banquet. This idea is based on an Oxfam where some 200
students will be put in a dining hall, receiving a ticket at the door. 80% of the students will
receive a ticket denoting their status as the poorest in the world, and will sit on the ground of
the dining hall with a bowl of rice for a meal. 15% of the students will receive a ticket essentially
denoting middle class status in the world, meaning they receive chairs to sit on and a bowl of
vegetable rice. The remaining 5% receive a full three-course meal seated around a table
looking out at everyone else. Afterwards, presentations are given regarding the point of the
whole exercise and small group discussions are opened up.
For a full timetable of the week's events, see next week's Courier, out May 3
PAGE 9
/FEA TU R ES
w /r tH IU n iu
nucoinn
Monday 25th April 2005
The w orld's obsession w ith conspiracy theories is bestreflected in the two m illion plus sales of The
DaVinci Code. But Dan Brown's book is just one of a nu m ber of alternative theories that proves society
is becom ing increasingly dissatisfied w ith ‘the tru th '.
K A TH ER IN E SANDERS investigates.
THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE
T
HE POPULARITY of books like the conspiracists would argue, is possibly not
'Unlocking the DaVinci Code: a proportional response to a crashed weather
Truth or Conspiracy?' have balloon. The truth may be out there, but will
shown that our love of we ever know it?
conspiracy theories is alive and
CIA cover-up?
well. There are literally thousands of
websites putting forth one theory or
another, ranging from what is really in our
On August 5, 1962, Marilyn Monroe was
food, to whether the 'King' still lives, to found naked on the floor of her bedroom by
the man who thinks that every time a her housekeeper and her psychiatrist, having
newsreader says the word mad, or one of taken a deadly overdose of the barbiturate
its synonyms, they are referring to him. Nembutal.
Suicide or foul play is the
Indulging in our fascination with cover question?
ups, this week The Courier examines four
There was a history of depression in
of the best.
Marilyn's family and Marilyn herself had been
A lie n s am o ng st us?
Roswell is the original and best known
conspiracy theory. In July 1947 an object
crashed into desert land in New Mexico near
the town of Roswell. At first the military, who
had a base stationed near to where to object
crashed, told the media that they had
recovered an unidentified flying disk. Hours
later they retracted this statement and said it
was nothing more than a fallen weather
balloon.
Certain eyewitnesses claim to have seen
the retrieval of alien bodies and there are
photos and a video which appear to deal with
the autopsy of these aliens, though the
veracity of this material is hotly disputed.
How far can you trust the testimony of people
in a country where more people claim to have
been abducted by aliens than have a valid
US passport? Extreme security measures
were put in place around the crash site and
additional military units were flown in. Which,
emotionally destroyed by the collapse of her
marriage to playwright Arthur Miller two years
previously, who was, in her own words, 'the
love of her life'. On this evidence, suicide
seems a very likely cause of death. But there
are other theories.
The most prominent of those is that the
Kennedy family were involved. After affairs
with both Robert and John, there are those
who believe the CIA murdered her, as she
knew too much. This does appear highly
unlikely, as Marilyn was little more than a bit
of fun for both of the brothers and so the
likelihood of the Kennedy's national secrets
being divulged during pillow talk is small.
Another theory puts forward the idea that
Monroe was killed by the Mafia as some sort
revenge on the Kennedy family. Mob bosses
thought that they would have the family on
their side after Joe Kennedy Sr was saved
from being 'hit' by a m obster chief, but
instead Robert Kennedy was determined to
crack down on organised crime. Evidence
linking Monroe to Robert Kennedy was
supposedly removed from the scene by
Robert before it could be discovered by the
police.
Walking on the moon or posing for the
cameras?
The question of whether Neil Armstrong
really was the first man to set foot on the
moon is another hotly debated topic. Was the
whole thing a charade designed to cheese off
the Soviets?
Was the seemingly billowing
American flag actually flying in the Nevada
desert, or simply trying to find its centre of
gravity on the moon?
Were the photos
carefully constructed using studio lights or
were they really taken by astronauts who
couldn't see through the view-finder of their
camera?
Whilst there seems to be reasonable, logical
answers to these questions, and more
besides, the sceptics remain unconvinced.
During the Cold War, the USA would have
gone to any lengths to ensure that the
Soviets did not gain superiority in any field. It
could also have served as a welcom e
distraction to the Vietnam War. But then
again, with 750 000 people involved with the
moon landing, none of whom have come
forward admitting to the cover up, could a
faked landing really have remained a secret
this long?
New wave of conspiracy theories
The latest conspiracy theory on the block
concerns the cause of the recent tsunami in
South-East Asia. Al-Jazeera, the popular,
although often controversial, Arab news
channel has made several reports on what
caused the tidal wave, and not all of them
attribute it to an earthquake.
According to this news group, some believe
that the tsunami was caused by an electro­
magnetic pulse. This electro-magnetic pulse
was produced by the Americans and Indians
testing new weapons and may or may not
have been deliberately done to harm that
region of the world. Also mooted is the
possibility that aliens wanted to correct the
earth's "wobbly" rotation and picked the
tsunami option as the best way to do this.
(The tsunami did disrupt the earth's rotation
and even slowed the day by 2.68
microseconds).
However the weapons testing theory has
been dismissed in scientific circles, given that
the creation of a wave on that scale would
take more than a billion tons of energy. No
comment seems to have been made on the
alien theory - perhaps it was a revenge
attack for the disrespectful way in which their
compatriots were treated at Roswell?
W hether it be the death of a celebrity or a
devastating terrorist attack, we don't seem to
be content with the straightforward, less
intriguing version of events. Are we right to
be so mistrustful of the official version of
events or do 'they' really have something to
hide? And will we ever be satisfied either
way? Short of the Queen divulging her part
in the plan to eliminate Diana or seeing Elvis
wander into the local Burger King to order an
whopper with fries (King-size, naturally), this
doubt in the words of those in charge is likely
to remain. After all, we know they're hiding
something...
WASTE NOT WANT NOT
If it’s high street you’re after, stick to Top Shop and
H&M. But for something braver and more ethical,
MERIEL CRAWFORD suggests taking a peak at Junk™
ECYCLE IS a word which is are completely unique. You will never have to
familiar to all of us. Most of us worry about being seen in the same outfit as
do our bit for the environment, someone else ever again.” This was truly
whether it’s putting our empty believable as everything was individual and
beer cans in the green recycle unique.
Theournext collection was very ghetto
bins, re-using carrier bags or donating
fabulous. Adidas tracksuit bottoms had been
unwanted clutter to charity.
R
However, Newcastle University fashion
enthusiast Helen Wells has taken recycling to
new extremes - her business enterprise
company, Junk™, is not far from what the
name suggests. Along with her team, she
hunts down old, pre-loved clothes and gives
them a new lease of life as ilber trendy
fashion wear. With 6% of the world’s pollution
coming from textile waste, the team at Junk™
are committed to reducing this in every way
they can.
Every Wednesday, Apartment Luxebar hosts
a night called Fashionista with catwalk shows
from a wide variety of fashion outlets in
Newcastle - from Ted Baker to more obscure,
individual shows. On Wednesday 20 April,
The Courier went along to see what
environmentally friendly clothing really looked
like - preparing for Hessian sacks, bin liners
and sweet wrappers reminiscent of those
dreaded school fashion shows. However, on
arrival, it was clear that the event had
attracted all of the ‘beautiful people’ of
Newcastle, so curiosity set in to see what kind
of clothes were being displayed. The venue
soon filled up, and with lots of drinks promos
(cocktails for £2.50 seemed to be a hit) the
crowd were soon ready for the show to begin.
Following a brief introduction to the show by
two certainly fashion-conscious girls, the
models were sent down the catwalk one-byone. What immediately struck a chord was
the professional look of all the clothes. They
did not seem ‘customised’ or
n e c k lm e s a n O e a ^ y
fw
make-shift at all.
They were all very
wearable and most people would have been
comfortable in several of the outfits. Although
there were some very risqu6 plunging
necklines and heavily corseted backs,
everything was designed for ‘normal’ girls, so
there is no need to be a six foot-tall size eight
to wear these clothes - they really were for
everyone.
The show fell into some quite distinctive
categories. First off, in line with the Sienna
inspired craze of the summer, there was an
ethnic-boho style collection - lots of Africanstyle prints, frilly white skirts and handkerchief
tops. Each of the complete outfits looked
stunning
on
the
catwalk,
but
on
Northumberland Street in the April showers,
probably just one item in theme would suffice!
One outfit was especially stunning, a white
dress with an ethnic print, worn with a wide
leather belt. It had a halter neck and looked
as though it had been constructed from a
huge square of fabric.
As the two
commentators kept saying: “The clothes here
altered and made into knee length pencil-style
skirts, and big ruffles had been added along
the hemlines. These were paired with little
jackets covered in prints, with one outfit even
having Elvis printed on the bum. This range
was very alternative - moving away from the
high street and Milan catwalk fashion. Not a
look for the self-conscious individual!
A tweed, sexy-secretary look was the next
catwalk offering.
The best outfit was
modelled by an especially strutty model who
was loving it on the catwalk - and the
audience were loving her too. She wore a
brown skirt suit with a twist...a cropped jacket
with a plunging neckline and a flash of red at
the waist. There were also models wearing
three-quarter length trousers and huge
necklaces, with very Sex and the City inspired
corsages.
The most exciting collection was the tropical
looking one. Most eye-catching was a white
A -line skirt with two enorm ous printed
butterflies on each side in orange and purple
tie-dye effect. Dressed down with a simple
vest and a feminine belt, it was a real showstopper. The highlight of the show for me was
the 80s style primary coloured dresses which
had been remodelled with both draping and
halter necks. These were the kind of clothes
our mothers were wearing throughout the
summers of the 1980s, although they were no
longer frumpy, but funky. Brightly coloured
belts were strapped
n o r m a r g i r l s ..
high
on
the
waist and the hair was spectacular. The
crimped, punk style hair was the best, and Gill
G arrity hairdressing really added a little
something special to the show. Who exactly
would wear these crazy and truly eclectic
clothes in an everyday environment is a
challenging thought, but anyone with the guts
to would certainly reap the rewards. Another
dress had been made into an almost togastyle dress and with a simple white vest worn
underneath, making it slightly more high
street.
The final collection was a sexy, Goth-vamp
and black-tie range; lots of leather and PVC
with more corsets teamed this time with floorgrazing skirts. There were skirts which were
full length at the back, very short at the front.
One of the most popular outfits here was a
black silk-taffeta looking two-piece outfit. The
skirt was very full and flowing, with yards of
spare material. The top was very midriff
baring and around the hips was a low slung
red patterned belt. It was truly stunning and
would be a showstopper at any graduation or
end of year Ball. Ail of the models were
The show kicked off with the Sienna-inspired craze of the summer
adorned with glitzy jewels and ethnic bangles
from Mikey which provided the perfect
finishing touches to these unique outfits.
Junk™ clothing is stocked at Royal
Vintage, has occasional stalls outside
Newcastle Union, sells on e-bay, or you can
contact
them
via
their
website
www.junkclothing.biz.
Royal Vintage also
stocks a wide range of other vintage clothing,
both customised and original, unaltered
clothing. They can be found on Worswick
Street, just below the fire station. So if you’re
bored with being a clone of everyone else you
walk past in town, then head down to Junk™
for a truly unique piece, and remember recycle- the possibilities are endless!
•4-
PAGI41/TRAVEL
TRAVE
THE COURIER
Monday 25th April 2185
9 St Mary’s Place, Newcastle NE1 7PG
□191 233 2111
n e w c a s t Ie @ s t a t r a v e I. c o . u k
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REBECCA WRIGHT braved wriggly food, lots of being pointed at and good old-fashioned market bartering to have
a fantastic time in Beijing.
HE FIRST thing that strikes you
about China is the sheer volume
of people and the breathtaking
array of colours, fabrics and
exhibitions that characterised
the country celebrations of their Chinese
New Year.
The host of the Olympics in 2008, the capital
city of Beijing was our base for discovering
the ancient historical sites of the Great Wall of
China and the 100-acre Tiananmen Square,
situated at the gates of the Forbidden City.
We were also in awe of the beautiful Chinese
architecture of the Temple of Heaven nestled
in the trees and the Summer Palace on a
peaceful lake dotted with ornate boats.
We certainly had a feel of both the old and
new China, as along with the ancient
monuments there is a patchwork of modern
One of many street markets with caged animals
S TA
culture, rich commerce and poverty - with
huge state-of-the-art business centres
alongside dilapidated flats and sewage works.
As well as taking in the more famous sites,
we also visited the modern working Beijing
with visits to silk, jade, pearl and factories and
incredible markets where bartering is
essential to get the true experience; I was
quite chuffed to walk away with an amazing
embroidered white silk throw for the
equivalent of 90p. Everything does seem
extremely cheap in China, as we discovered
in the supermarket where we stocked up on
about 25 CD albums for £1 each.
A visit to the old-fashioned Hutong District of
the city was fascinating as alongside beautiful
rivers and ornate statues were tiny streets
lined with filthy, narrow streets running with
sewage. On a rickshaw ride or "pedicab", we
also saw the piles of tiny cages with mangy
rabbits, cats and dogs stacked up at the back
of the houses and restaurants. These areas
reflect the abject poverty that many of the
population inhabit, with over 10% of the 1.3
billion population living below the poverty line.
Highlights of the trip included mounting the
colossal 2,600ft Great Wall of China, ’the only
man-made structure visible from space',
where we were surrounded by incredible
views of the mountain range and the 6,000km
wall stretching as far as you can see into the
distance.
Tiananmen Square is also amazing, a place
which really has to be seen to be believed due
to the vast size and beauty of the square.
During special holidays the square is covered
with fresh flowers, and most days the skys
above are filled with decorative kites of
butterflies and dragons and absolutely
teaming with Chinese tourists, many of whom
thought that our strange English faces were
the main tourist attraction! The square is also
incredible by night, with lights illuminating the
beautiful architecture of the buildings,
temples and statues surrounding it.
However there is also the historical
importance of the site, where much blood has
been shed. Just 16 years ago in June 1989,
the square was the place of the famous
massacre where hundreds of unarmed
students and civilians were shot down by the
Chinese military for creating Asocial chaosi as they peacefully camped out in the square
to protest for greater democracy. And all this
in Tiananmen, the place that in Chinese
means, "The Gate of Heavenly Peace". And it
is clear that Communism is still very strongly
enforced, with the armed military regularly
marching the streets.
The traditional Chinese cuisine brought
mixed reactions, as it turned out to be
radically different from the Chinese food we
get in the UK. Although most people tried the
more unusual food, which included snake,
sea slug, fried eel and a variety of other
unrecognisable and inedible 'delicacies',
there was also sweet and sour pork and rice,
crispy Peking duck and the delicious green
tea for the less adventurous. We also got the
chance to make traditional Chinese
’ws
Call into t h e S t IVIarys Pla ce
b r a n c h f o r m o r e info on
trav e lling a r o u n d t h e w o rld ,
and pick up t h e R o u n d the
dumplings, called Jiaozi, at a restaurant as
part of the Chunjie, the Chinese Lunar New
Year holiday.
The Chinese live an incredibly healthy way
of life which was clear with the streets at
sunrise that are lined with local people
practicing Tai Chi to begin the day; this along
with just about everybody owning a bike to get
around and a diet almost entirely made up of
fresh fish, vegetables and rice. Also the
hospitals, unlike in the Western world where
we have pills every time we get a cough, offer
Chinese
massage,
acupuncture
and
alternative medicines instead of drugs. No
wonder the population is ever-thriving and the
government have to restrict every family to
one child...
Rebecca flew to China with Air China for £550 return
A New Year street parade
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PAGE 12/ENTS
TV-. TV... TV... TV™ TV... TV„. TV-. TV™ TV... TV™ TV... TV... TV™ TV™ TV™ TV™ TV... TV™ TV™
THE COURIER
Manday 25th April 2005
+
TELEVISION EVENT OF THE YEAR: DR WHO
By CHRIS “PM OBSESSED WITH DR
WHO” CHAPMAN
YEAH, I’M A tad biased on this one. As
a self-confessed geekdom God of
Doctor Who, I’ve been looking forward
to this for sixteen long years. I would
squeal in delight at the mere sight of
the TARDIS, the faintest rumble of a
Cyberman invasion or the most
meagre nibble of a jelly baby. However,
over the years I have (allegedly) learnt
to separate my inner-nerd from my
inner-critic. By prising these two
powerful forces apart, I can still look at
this new Eccleston series with a
vaguely objective eye - and it’s
brilliant.
The first thing that strikes you is the pace of
the thing. Vintage W ho stories would run and
run over consecutive weeks (up to as much as
fourteen!), but Russell T Davies' new beast is
a raging animal of pace trapped within a 45
minute time bubble. Stripped down of any of
the old series’ notorious padding, this new
W ho never catches breath as it shuttles
through the cosmos. This new speed was
never more apparent than in the opening story
Rose, as Billie Piper’s young shop assistant is
attacked by marauding shop dummies,
rescued by a mysterious bomb-toting, leather
•tn o
r 'o / i t ^ i y a
i> '
a
t o u r l s t
jacket wearing stranger and dragged beneath
the London Eye to combat a gigantic pool of
red sludge that mischievously aims to
dominate the planet Earth! It's a lot to fit in and
makes for intoxicating viewing.
immediately to be the direct successor to the 9
vile Bonnie Langford. Instead, Billie is
charming, smart and the perfect go-between
to link Eccleston’s edgy doctor with a
potentially bewildered audience.
So far we’ve had dummies, exploding Earths,
Victorian ghosts (or are they?) and farting
cabinet ministers and the impressive viewing
figures have wedged Doctor Who firmly within
the BBC’s top ten shows. Ratings began with
around 10.5 million (huge in the modem TV
arena) and have levelled out at a very healthy
7-9 million. Much has been made of
Eccleston's departure from the show, but the X j
truth is - it was always the plan for him to do a #
single season and a surprise regeneration had •
been planned for the end of the season. God
bless The Sun for ruining that nice little shock
then.
The mid-season announcement of Casanova's
David Tennant as the new Doctor provides full
confirmation that W ho is back to stay. An
extended Christmas special and a second
series are on their way, and the huge fandom
seems genuinely surprised that, for once,
things are going extraordinarily well.
And with talk of the destruction of the time
lords, the mysterious ‘bad w o lf motif and the
Daleks returning this weekend, I certainly
won’t be moving from behind my sofa for the
Eccleston and Piper make for a fabulous
remaining eight weeks. It m ight get a bit
pairing, the latter in particular being something
smelly back there and I may well lose my job,
o f a revelation. I was never more dismayed in
but it will be well worth it. Vroopl Vroop!
the huge run up to transmission than upon
hearing of Piper’s casting, threatening
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PAGE 13/ENTS
Monday 25th April 2005
ARTS... ARTS.. ARTS... ARTS- ARTS... ARTS.. ARTS... ARTS.. ARTS... ARTS... ARTS- ARTS.
OU T OF THE
CORSET
SEB L I M E
Matt Robinson gave a
sterling performance as
the confused and selfcentred protagonist Seb
Lime, with a cast that were
equally believable and
thorough in their
portrayals. The play
proved extremely funny at
points, with an undertone
of seriousness seeming to
come through to make a
warning about bargains,
relationships and honesty.
With a good variety of
tone, combing light­
hearted song and dance
with serious acting, the
show seemed to be
enjoyed by all who saw it
and took part.
Emily Turner
Black Swan Theatre
1st-4th March
The NUTS Spring season
was kicked off with The
Courier’s and Pulp's own
film and TV editor, Chris
Chapman's brand new
never-before-seen play
‘Seb Lime’. The play sees
the darkly humorous plight
of its protagonist,
Sebastian Lime, in a world
caught somewhere
between the realms of
reality and nightmare. The
play, directed by Paul
Black, was thoroughly
gripping and made the
most of its comedic
elements with excess
blood and gore at points.
St Luke’s Church
igth-18th March
'Out of the Corset1was not
the saucy girt-on-girl romp all
the boys had hoped for. Yes,
there was kissing, semi­
nakedness and nipple
tassels. But this wasn't pom.
Actually, the play portrayed
the almost touching story of a
lesbian in Victorian London
searching lor love and
acceptance.
Deep? Well kind of. The
performance of Nan (played
by Frances Amey aka Dina
in The Demon
Headmaster"!) shone out
(despite dodgy wig) and
impressively managed to
hold the audience captive
throughout the rather long
performance. Together with
W E S T S ID E
STORY
Stage 2
9th .12th March
NUTS’ West Side Story
was an enjoyable
experience, with highquality performances, a
lively musical score,
provocative vocals and
pulsating choreography.
Charlie Palley as Tony
provoked some gasps
when he sang
'Something’s Coming’ and
his duet ‘Somewhere’
with Natalie Wilkinson’s
Maria was irrefutably
heart warming. The
chemistry was more
believable, however,
between Bernado
(Jonathan Fairley) and
Anita (Lucy Cockerline).
Lucy, gave a terrific
performance, nailing the
Puerto Rican accent and
making a big impression.
The best number - the
quintet ‘Tonight’ - blew
the audience away, with
each character proving
their capabilities as
vocalists.
Given more time, the
accents could have been
more authentic and the
performance fine tuned
but overall West Side
showcased some
admirable musical talents,
impressive dance steps
and obviously passionate
performances.
Van Lambert
St Luke’s
Church
6th-9th March
the striking set, we were also
highly entertained by the
charismatic cockney singing
of Kitty, the risqu6 and
hilarious 'rent-boy1scene, anti
the uproarious gaggle of girls
in the dominatrix’ mansion.
Comedy thankfully
compensated for some
wooden performances, but
also made it difficult to take
certain scenes (er,
hermaphrodites...) seriously.
An unusual, eye-opening,
erotic attempt the play was
definitely worth a peep. It was
telling, however, that the fire
breathing, sword-swallowing
flamethrower was my
favourite act, although he hac
absolutely no relevance to
the plodding plot
Pippa McIntyre
ROAD
Described as an Under
Milk Wood for Lancashire,
Road charts the
devastating effects of
Thatcherism in the 80s on
working-class folk.
Almost every character
in the play has a
monologue, filled with the
poignancy of a hard life
and desperate times.
What seems to strike the
audience most is the
realisation that it is the
politics of our country,
which has destroyed much
of Britain.
The play is acted in an
extremely profound way
and the chemistry is
exuded well, especially
between characters such
as Joey and Clare (Tom
Bennett and Kerry
Gooderson). Further
impressive turns
come from Sam Smart
as a skinhead and Dave
Simmonds as Scullery.
These performances
shine
throughout the play and
engage the audience in a
rare but special way.
With clever direction, an
impressive set and witty
repartee, Road is certainly
a play to be savoured.
Roz Hill
MUSIC.. MUSIC.. MUSIC- MUSIC.. MUSIC- MUSIC- MUSIC- MUSIC- MUSIC- MUSIC.
of it in the coming weeks. On first hearing, it
doesn’t stand out as a particularly great song,
but listen a couple of times and you’ll want to
put it on repeat. Not unlike Clocks in basic
melody, it is destined to be the sort of tune
which sticks in your head, Coldplay fan or not.
Coldplay are good at nice, inoffensive songs
and this is no exception. Not too fast, not to
loud, not too exciting, if you want something
pleasant, Speed of Sound is ideal.
If you seek something entirely original from
one of Britain’s biggest bands, it’s probably
best not to bother with this one but I challenge
you to find something else new which is
completely unique.
Coldplay
Speed of Sound (Single)
EMI
So finally Coldplay are back with a long
awaited new single and is does not
disappoint. One thing's for sure, Speed of
Sound is most definitely a grower, which is
good as I cjQn’t doubt we’ll be hearing plenty
Look out for Coldplay’s new album, X and Y,
out in June, conveniently just before their
headline set at Glastonbury.
Fran Naish
Daft Punk
Human After All (Album)
Virgin Records
If, like me, you thought the title of this record
was supposed to imply that Thomas
Bangalter and Guy Manuel de HomemChristo have hung up their vocoder in favour
of some more natural sounds, then, also like
myself, you’re horribly mistaken.
Human After All is brash, at times difficult to
listen to, and it lacks that dance-ability of the
duo’s other albums. Where Discovery had
house and Homework had disco, After All is
more of a thrashing, random electro beep
affair and because its insistence on
repetitiveness is so extreme, I can only
ponder whether it’ll have any success
outside of specialist clubs, particularly as it
seems to also nod towards metal. If ACDC
made dance music, it would probably sound
rather like this.
Given that the boys have had four years out
since Discovery, I hoped that beyond the
trademark vocoders and loops there'd be a
bit of substance to this album. Alas, whilst
the vocals are better, more trashy and raw,
there’s a soul-destroying lack of magic about
this one, and in its place, an awkward
cacophony that won't be gracing my sound
system again.
Sarah Chapman
+
iff
■
High performers create
their own opportunities.
I
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Go on. Be a Tiger.
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UNION
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.Employer: ODM Limited.
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Applicants wanted to introduce Newcastle
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applications and forwarding to ODM
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outgoing, have a bubbly personality, and
be confident and comfortable approaching
people.
Pay: £45.00 per match day, £2.00 for every
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Hours: W eekday matches 5pm to 9pm.
W eekend matches 12.30 to 4.30pm &
shop hours Monday to Sunday 10am |
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Employer: Acritas.
Employer: Care (Cottage & Rural Enterprises Ltd).
Statistician x 1 position.
Required to work on ad hoc projects for a market
research company who require someone to conduct
additional analysis with their data sets. Applicants
must possess very strong statistical analysis and
numeracy skills and be very familiar with SPSS
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Would
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Pay: £10.00 per hour
Hours: Various - approx 7 days per month
Location: Jesmond.
Support Workers x several positions.
Support Workers required to assist with all aspects of
daily life for young adults with learning disabilities.
Working hours can be arranged to suit you.
Employment is subject to a criminal records bureau
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Pay: Approx. £5.50 per hour and £24.00 for a
sleepover.
Hours: Various to suit you - temporary & permanent
positions available.
Location: Ponteland & Blyth.
Employer: Learning Disabilities Federation - North
Tyneside.
Leisure Companions x lots of positions.
'Break for leisure companions' required to assist
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a learning / physical disability and help them to access
social events within their community. The successful
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Pay: £6.23 per hour
Hours: 4 hour shifts. Minimum 4 hours per week /
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FOR MORE JOB
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GO TO THE JOB
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Dental receptionist x 1 position.
Required for dental practice in Low Fell, Gateshead.
You will be talking to clients, making appointments,
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Direct bus available from city centre. No previous
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PAGE 16/COLUMNS
THE COURIER
Monday 1401 March 2005
A b b * ]'*
PEZ
A t p V u n b e -f
more than
just ABC...
SEZ
Bringing meaning to your life...
This week: April Fools’ Day
STUdents, ‘tis time to study. The ultimate weeks of
term mean several things: silly amounts of time spent
in the tempestuous library trying to reach the
ultimatum - get a 2:1 or face unemployment, an
unbelievably scary thought.
Similarly, the thought of leaving university is giving me ulcers.
Where will I be without my support group, my friends, my interest
free overdraft? Uh oh. Still, now is not the time to be stressed;
getting uptight over the future will not stop time passing, it will
merely make the remaining months unenjoyable.
Seriously, I
strongly recommend ignoring those ugly thoughts and using your
now surplus energy to study. Studying does not always equal
success; hours can be spent unproductively traumatising over
thorny secondary sources, producing sore heads and stress.
Sometimes it's unavoidable and it is at these times that you should
stop
and
try
stress
busting.
Here
are
some
supercalifragilisticexpialidocious stress busters: Sing a silly song
whilst taking a shower (try Under the Sea or Um Bop), treat
yourself to something unusual, smoke a soothing cigarette, take a
trip to some uncharted territory, play some sport, squeeze a spot,
tell a tale to someone you haven’t spoken to for some time, do an
unselfish deed, bake a scrumptious cake, spread the love...the list
could go on but seriously, try to focus on your goal and remember
that time out will help you reach it more effectively. Spend your
time wisely. Currently, my favourite stress buster is Scrabble; it
gives you a break and stimulates your tired mind. Sex is also a
tickling stress buster....so that’s probably my favourite stress
reliever. Scrabble or sex? Ur...
‘ Summer time and the living is easy!” Obviously Gershwin was
never a student, silly sausage, he should have written “Summer
time and you’ll be in the library!'’ The composer was also never a
sheep as other wise he would have put "Summer time and the
farmers are shearing.” Summer is splendid. Sunshine (vitamin D),
sandals, sea, sand and samba (another stress remover.)
Seriously students soon it will all be over and the fun will unravel.
Talking about fun, imagine how un-fun fun it would be if we had it
all the time. You need the shit to make you appreciate the thrills.
Triumphs are good for the soul, overcoming unwanted obstacles
make you stronger. So don’t be sad, smile at the thought of
thrashing them.
Speaking of smiles, something that tantalises my smirk is
Sunday tea....university style. This feeds six.
Yes, I know I’m late, but I don’t
care. It’s still April, so I’m going
to tell you where April Fools’ Day
comes from - and as it’s not
actually the 1st of April, this isn’t
a hoax (as if I’d ever tell you
anything that isn’t true). This is
how it goes...
Back in 1582, Pope Gregory XIII
introduced a new calendar (don't know
why, there didn’t seem to anything
wrong with the old one) and changed
the first day of the year from April 1s' to
January 1s*. This change was resisted
by many European countries, with
England in particular refusing to join in
Pre-heat the oven to 20CTC. Wash the chicken to get rid of any
ugly bits! Place the chicken in a roasting tin and cut the skin at the
joints and at the top of the breast. Crush the garlic and dried
rosemary and mix in with the butter. Spread it under the skin,
cover the chicken in silver foil and roast for 2 hours (or until the
juices run clear.) Meanwhile peel the potatoes and place them in
a large pan of cold salted water, bring to the boil and simmer for
about half an hour (or until soft.) Slice the parsnips/sweet
potatoes into wedges, toss in olive oil and salt. Place in oven for
half an hour. When the potatoes are soft, take half of them and
add to roasting parsnips/sweet potatoes. Make some mash out of
the rest. When everything is nearly ready, slice the carrots and
place in a pan of boiling water for three minutes, drain, then quickly
saute them in a bit of butter and brown sugar. Then place peas in
boiling water for two minutes. Drain, add a knob of butter.
Truly Undeniably Scrumptious
Abt
the general rubbishness of 16 -century
communications, many outlying regions
still used the old calendar for many
years, which led to them being ridiculed
by the more ‘sophisticated’ citydwellers. This really took off in France,
where anyone who could be convinced
to celebrate New Year’s Day on April
1s* would be publicly ridiculed as ‘un
Poisson d’Avril’. Yes, that does mean
April Fish. In France, April Fools' jokes
often have reference to fish, and the
French delight in shouting “Poisson
d'Avril!” at the victims. Lovely country,
strange people.
One of the most famous April Fools’
hoaxes appeared on the BBC’s
Panaroma programme in 1957 when
Richard Dimbleby reported on the early
spaghetti harvest in Switzerland (with
actual footage of old peasant women
reeling in spaghetti from trees),
prompting many viewers to ring in
asking for details of where to visit to
best experience the typical spaghettigatherer’s lifestyle. Foolish Poissons.
ROBERT PERRY
LETTER TO THE EDITOR
Dear Courier,
Many congratulations on your Ethics
and Environment week special last
term. From the coming Green Festival
this month, to international terrorism,
you covered a wide range of issues
and events. I was also impressed with
James Conway’s article on the Green
Party in the run-up to the General
Election. As a recent Graduate, and
Green Party Candidate for Newcastle
Central, I encourage readers to delve a
little deeper and look beyond the grey,
A
C \ \ t rS
You will need:
1 chicken, approx 1.2kg (without giblets)
500g of potatoes
500g of parsnips/sweet potatoes
500g of carrots
500g frozen peas
Butter
Dried Rosemary
2 cloves of garlic
Olive oil
Salt
Pepper
until 1752, which means we spent 170
years missing appointments with the
rest of the world.
It wasn’t just the English who didn’t
use the new calendar though. Due to
parties of Westminster. As to your
concern that the party does not have a
single leader, well, all Green Party
members are leaders in their own right.
Those who remember the anti-war
marches will recall my personal
conviction and leadership over two
years ago.
As to our "series of principle speakers”,
yes we do have two appointed
speakers, one male, one female, the
Leader (!) of Brighton’s Green Group of
Councillors and a Euro-MP
respectively. The observation of being,
rudderless and without direction is well
wide of the mark - the Greens were the
only political party to hold a consistent
line in opposition to the war in Iraq.
Indeed, internationally renowned gay
and human rights campaigner Peter
Tatchell urges “everyone who supports
Gay rights to vote Green”.
Joe Hulm
Green Party Candidate for Newcastle
upon Tyne Central.
BULLY
V00!
An Evening of Sketch Comedy
(and more!)
Doors 8pm
Monday 2nd May
Hyena Comedy Club
Entry: £5
1
PAGE 17/LETTERS
THE COURIER
Monday 14th March 2005
Moaners and groaners, sexually deviant and sexually dysfunctional, geeks and jocks, and Jesmond rahs and Fenham...
erm... paupers... bear your all on anything from the Union to crabs to Kylie to national government. I promise to
provide you with some of my (in)famous wise words. Likewise, if you disagree with something I write, bitch back!
SWEET FANNY ADAMS
D ear D an,
You're an agony aunt and I'm in agony. My
fanny really hurts but I don't
like doctors. W hat should I do?
Yours,
Ms. Adams
Dan says:
Well dear, despite being an agony aunt, I'm
afraid I am not the proud possessor of a fanny
like yourself. W ere I to have one, I would
undoubtedly know what to do with it, and be
able to advise you on a more personal level
about how to trade in your ladies' pains for an
altogether more enjoyable experience. W hilst
the very thought of a minky examination
makes me want to chunder, I suggest you get
over your fear of doctors and take yourself
and your lady bits to see one. After all, this
could be a minor complaint or a massive
problem that could damage you for life.
Failure to get this problem sorted could mean
a life of abstinence and Femfresh, and I
wouldn’t wish that for anyone - not even my
worst enemies. Well, okay, I’m lying - maybe
one or two. The number for the GUM clinic at
the General Hospital is 0191 219 5013/11, or
if you think it’s not that sort of problem pop
down to see your GP post haste. And always
remember, the doctor might be dishy: it could
be the start of something beautiful.
USE MY VOTE?
D e a r D an ,
I really don't know how to vote in this General
Election. Could you help me please?
‘Swinging Voter'
Dan says:
My dear, as a fully paid-up member of the
'blue rinse brigade', I could only say vote Tory.
They're the nice people with blue rosettes
you’ll see on polling day, who always tend lo
look delightfully flustered. Seriously though,
for some (supposedly) impartial advice go to
www.bbc.co.uk/vote2005 where you’ll be able
to see how the main parties stand on various
issues. Then make your mind up. O f course if
you think the BBC is run by a bunch of rabid
Trotskyites or secretly controlled by Margaret
Thatcher then you’re not going to have much
faith in it, but then again if you thought
anything like that you probably wouldn’t be
asking me for advice. I would also like to point
out that so many people around the world
have died campaigning to get the vote, and
that as such I believe everyone has a
responsibility to get out there and mark a
ballot paper on May 5th. Even if you didn't
want to vote for a proper party, there’s always
a protest vote available. Not casting any
aspersions, of course...
DAN W O U LD LO VE TO H E A R FROM Y O U I
E M A IL : C O U R IE R .L E T T E R 3 Q N C L .A C . u k
CRAP
CHAP'S
Flashbacks/Realisation O f Impending Doom
Represented By The Outside World. It could
just be a comfort blanket coated with dripping
vomit pools, but the figure of Optimist Prime
within me swears blind that ifs simply one of
those pristine eiderdown new dawn things. God
bless you Optimist.
But what on earth are
we leaving behind? Lie ^
Apart from that it's not. Apart from that I'm
ins? They’re overrated.
happy and proud and god damn smug about
Student loans? They’re
my student years (all six of 'em - count 'em,
under-funded.
Three
baby I) and am more than happy to take the
legged
pub
crawls?
next step. Now I never thought I'd end up They're
just
bloody
saying that.
dangerous. Personally, I’ll miss the open
Now, of course, this ramble of egocentrism
mindedness and the unions and all the balls I
could simply be a pathetic self defence. A
can possibly bribe my way into. But I'm being
feeble shield of steel (ooh, Batfink reference positive - forward thinking, forward thinking,
get ini) to ward off those late night Nam
never look back Chap, never look back.
IT’S THE end of an era. Well, sort of.
What I mean by ‘era’ and ‘end o f is that
^ I’m leaving university. So in fact it’s not
' \m uch of an end of anything really is it?
j Everything carries on and a few final
v years bugger off and sweat it out to the
/m ax in the resplendent real world. So in
fact it’s just me feeling sorry for myself.
At the end of a straight 18 years in academia,
we should just be bored, shouldn't we? Old
schoolmates of ours brazenly (one might
perhaps argue, wisely) bowed out after only
eleven - they've got something of a head start
on the real world now. The pressure o f feeling
that by now we should be on 20k or whatever,
means that the final
desperate shift from
student to worker bee
carries a multitude of
99
expectations and selfim posed-uber-pressure
(yes, I can use that
phrase!). Hopefully, we'll all be alright. But
perhaps we should lay provisions for what
happens if we're not.
In the pages of The Courier, in the very
sentences that you are reading now, dear
Lie ins? They’re
sweet reader, I propose - nay, I proclaim from
the highest tower with sizeable volume - the
birth of a new society. We shall call it The
Washouts Against Tenacity Society. Don’t let
the name fool you, it's actually a potentially
joyous band of brothers who exist to comfort
fellow ex-students who have donned those
wings, flown to close to the massive ball o f gas
we call the sun and come screaming back
down to Terra Firma. TWATS will be there for
you. And they’ll be there for me. And they’ll
endeavour to make sure that downtrodden ex­
students will always have somewhere to go in
the cold, something to eat and someone to
moan incessantly to until the land of Satan gets
a wee bit chilly.
So come on, join TWATS and we can discuss
the all important question ad infinitum: just whal
was that Chap's Crap going on about?
Your festival needs you !!!!!
Please
The Green Festival by helping us for a 4 hour shift - or 2 ......and we
will feed you and give you a drink.
W e have training times - but if you cannot make it - please still volunteer - turn
up on the days of the fest - and help make this year the best yet.
Please reply direct to the festival Newcastle Community Green Festival:
newcastle_greenfest@hotmail.com
Green Festival 2005
Sat 30 April noon - 6pm Family Day
Sunday 1st May noon - 11pm Main day
Leazes Park - FREE
FREE FREE I
I b Tb Tc F
1
1
41
FOO FIGHTERS* CHEMICAL BROTHERS
KASABIAN NATALIE IMBRUGLIA ATHLETE
ROOSTER KT TUNSTALL BATTLEmt S ONEHUS1C)
MAURO PICOTTO PETE TONG JUDGE JU L E S FERGIE
DAVE PEARCE JON O’B IR S H A P E S H I F T E R S TROPHY TWINS
RHYTHM BOYS RICHARD TULIP
THE BLACKjEJTED J?EA§ GWEN M ’EFANI
BASEMENT JAXX JA MIROttUAI jgmm
KAISER CHIEFS J g f M A R W§t, BRAVERY
THE FUTUREHEADS DO ME BAD THINGS INTERPOL
MAGIC .N i U M f l E R S l M ^ X I M O l M ^ i T H E S M E A Y S
FOR MORE INFORMATION OR TO LISTEN AGAIN 00 TO TO
b b c
.c
o
.u
k
/
r a d i o i
C ity off
2 STAGES. 2 DAYS. 30.000 PEOPLE. ALL LIVE AND FOR FREE
I SUNDERLAND I
'+ 1
PAGE 19/SPORT
sport
ThBCourier
Monday 25th April 2005
IM s m a k : The Big Punch-up, lions
preview and Toe Kwon Do success
SPORTING TOP 5...
CHEATING SCUMBAGS
TOON
WATCH ' ><
'
THE
UP
OF
■i ii— WEEKLY
vvLiurxL i
iROUND
a w u i iu
u
r
wr
NEWCASTLE’S SPORTING HIGHS
AND LOWS
After witnessing the kind of comical diving we have come to expect from Peter Kay in recent
Champion’s League fixtures, JAMES SWANN takes a look at the creme de la creme of sporting By TIM DEAKIN
tricksters...running bomb!
5.
Mike Atherton ‘alters the
condition of the ball’ against
South Africa, Lord’s, 1994.
Whether Atherton
was merely drying
his hands with the
dirt on that warm
summer’s day, or
surreptit-iously
applying it to the
side of the ball to
create a large amount of ‘reverse
swing' still remains a minor sporting
mystery.
More obvious was the
resulting controversy and sporadic
moustache twitching his actions
brought to that most genteel of sports,
cricket. “The umpires check the ball at
the end of each over and had no
complaint with the condition of the
bair, said Atherton who was fined
£2000 for failing to declare the filth in
the pocket of his cricket whites' to the
umpire. Howzat for a scandal!
4. German footballing referee
Robert Hoyzer, the late Hansie
Cronje, Liverpool FC legend
Bruce Grobbelaar (amongst
others) accept money to fix
matches.
Money talks, and indeed money spoke
to this talented
bunch
of
‘professionals’, who
over
the
past
decade forgot all
about
moral
decency and the
fact that they were
already being paid substantial salaries
to do something most can only dream
of and accepted large cash amounts
from
betting
syndicates
and
bookmakers to sway outcomes and
tamish the spirit of their respective
sports. Crime however doesn’t always
pay and sadly, Hoyzer is currently at
the centre of a huge investigation into
match-fixing, Grobbelaar is attempting
to rebuild his career in South Africa
and Cronje now resides in the big
cricket pavilion in the sky.
3.
Mike Tyson snacks on
Evander Holyfield’s ear during a
WBA
heavyweight
championship fight, Las Vegas,
1997.
Never one to associate himself with
civil human behaviour, Mike Tyson
took the ‘art’ of boxing to new lows (or
is that lobes) as he perceptibly
proceeded to gnaw off the lower part of
fellow participant Evander Holyfield's
right ear and take a quick nibble at his
left. Tyson was disqualified from the
match, with Holyfield being taken to
hospital to have his ear re-attached.
Referee, Mills Lane said of the incident
“I took one point away [from Tyson] for
pushing, one for biting.” So, how many
points deducted for flick-knives Mr.
Lane?
2. Ben Johnson ‘wins’ gold and
breaks the 100m world record,
Seoul Olympics, 1988.
Crossing the finish line of the 100
meter sprint in a mere 9.79 seconds
made Ben Johnson the fastest human
ever to grace planet Earth. It was a
proud moment for his home nation
Canada, which quickly turned into a
nightmare as Johnson tested positive
for a banned steroid, and his gold
medal was revoked.
“A sprinter
couldn’t hope to go world-class without
steroids"
Joh nso n’s
coach, Charlie
F r a n c is ,
proposed.
Johnson was
issued with a
lifetime
ban
and
tested
positive again
on
two
occasions as
he
later
attempted to
rebuild
his
shattered
c a r e e r J
Cheers, Charlie.
Easter Crucifixion
W hat a difference an Easter break makes. Finally Graeme Souness
begins to make a name for himself, with a surge up the league and cup
glory on the Newcastle agenda. Then a.surreal match against Aston
Villa began a run that has left the Scot inches from collecting his P45.
In the space of a week the Toon lost three games, conceding 10 goals
in the process. The resulting position of 14th in the Premiership, has
left Magpie fans once again crying out for a new manager. Fingers
must surely now be pointed at chairman Freddy Shepherd for the
decisions he has made over the last few months. You hire a relegation
manager, you create a relegation team.
Crack Down on Crime
The Bowyer - Dyer bout has been splashed across the headlines for
weeks, with widespread condem nation the general theme.
Considering the punishment that’s been handed out to the two players
over the incident, was it really necessary to get the police involved. It
1. Diego Maradona exercises was said that several complaints were handed in to the Northumbria
constabulary and that the men in Blue acted accordingly, but how
his ‘Hand of God’ to significant
much spare time must people have to write a letter that then wastes
success
against
England,
police time and money. In a matter that has cost Bowyer nearly a
Mexico ‘86.
quarter of a million pounds and has caused both players to miss vital
domestic games, a caution and a potential £50 fine must really put the
Five minutes into the second half of a
fear of God into the midfielders. Not.
fiercely fought quarter-final, with the
score rested at 0-0 and the memories
of yet another politically dubious war Transfer Speculation
still fresh in the minds of players and
fans, Diego Armando Maradona Despite Big Al receiving the necessary quota of begging letters to
challenged for a looping ball with Peter convince him to stay for another season, Souey will allegedly be given
Shilton,
‘playing
it’ past
the £30million to spend on players in the hope that he may just be able to
outstretched keeper and into the net. turn the club around. The possible departures of the likes of Bowyer,
In front of a disbelieving television- Robert, Kluivert and Bellamy hardly look set to bring jn substantial
viewing world and Aztec Stadium, sums, which might lead to a big money move for Shay Given to
Tunisian referee Ali Bennaceur Manchester United or Arsenal should further funds be required.
awarded the goal. “That first goal was So who’s on the^Scots shortlist? Owen and Yakubu are getting a fair
dubious” utters a despondent Bobby bit of attention, especially as' Patrick Kluivert looks certain to head
Robson after England lose 2-1, “but home in June, but the Madrid star may be out of reach of the Toon now
the second one was a miracle”. Wait that European football is off the agenda. Shaun Wright-Phillips is a
‘till you see the replays Bob.
potential goldmine on the right of midfield, while another experienced
central defender is a must. W hoever Souness buys, he has said that
he will be looking for experience rather than a “team of James
Milner’s”. Souness is apparently worried at how Milner is adapting to
life on Tyneside, as he is the only player who hasn’t thrown a hissy fit
at some point in the season.
“Sorry" seems the easiest word
Nicky Butt's reaction to his snubbing of Newcastle fans after the F.A.
Cup semi-final against Man Yoo confirmed the Magpies' status as the
most apologetic team in the country. Butt followed in the footsteps of
Kieron Dyer (twice!), Lee Bowyer and Laurent Robert to make public
apologies to the fans for various misdemeanours over the course of
the year. A curious omission from the list is Titus Bramble, who
apparently just doesn’t have the time to apologise for the 695
defensive errors he has made since the start of the season.
PAGE 20/SP0RT
THE COURIER
M andayttih March 2005
Will Wilkinson make Woodward’s Lions deadline?
SHOOTSJLIONS READY TO ROAR
I9IIY
HE SCORES
By GEMMA DAVIES
THE GREAT sense of occasion
that only a Lions tour can produce
descends once again this summer
as the best from England,
Scotland, Wales and Ireland join
forces to take on the heavyweights
from the Southern Hemisphere.
The announcement of the 44-man
squad to travel to New Zealand by
Sir Clive Woodward has provoked
a mixed reaction from the British
media, and whether Woodward
has really selected the “best” of
IN A year that has seen just about British remains to be seen.
everything imaginable happen in Facing the Kiwis in their own backyard
English football, we would have been foolish to perceive that is always a daunting task, but despite
Chelsea’s insurmountability in the Premiership race would the backbone of the squad coming
result in a dearth of excitement come the season’s climax. from the current World Cup holders,
The kind of scandal we all condemn yet crave has surfaced even the greatest of optimists must
once again in the form of another tapping-up scandal, and have their doubts over a Lions series
the only predictable element in the Rio Ferdinand saga is the victory come July. Of the eight times
that the Lions have travelled to New
cast of protagonists.
Sports Editor Martin
Crow takes his
weekly look at the
sporting world
The England defender’s meeting with agent Pini Zahavi and Chelsea
chief executive, Peter Kenyon, seemed to have caused only minor
ripples in footballing waters, but now the leading lights at both clubs have
been caught up in the most tonential of storms. Chelsea’s denial of
reports claiming an interest in Ferdinand appeared to have dampened
the speculation surrounding his commitment to Manchester United, but
the rift that has grown between Alex Ferguson and the United board, as
well as news of new contract talks has reignited the debate as to the
motives of both target and suitor.
It has emerged that the brief meeting in
London restaurant was followed by a
ree-hour discussion at another
location, something which neither player
nor either dub have been able to deny.
Ferdinand’s defence, rather like that he
ve after missing that drugs test, is
akier than United's current form, but
whether he actually does desire a move
south London remains a matter of
ense debate. That he is currently
negotiating a new contract at Old
Trafford could prove to be the real
reason behind the get-together. Kenyon
s Ferdinand well, having been the man behind his move to Old
>rd, and the dub have a very dose relationship with Zahavi, who is
| becoming known as the Stamford Bridge club's “fixer*. It is
inly comprehendible for Zahavi to persuade one of his employers to
play ball for the greater financial good of all involved.
In the drcumstances, one would envisage that United would be furious
situation, but the only murmurs of discontent have come from
son himself. United's board have sensibly remained silent on the
■
I
■
■
■
■
■
“Rio
Ferdinand’s
defence...is
shakier than
United’s
current form”
Zealand, they have returned home
vidorious on just one occasion; back in
1971 with a 2-1 series win.
The one omission from Woodward's
squad that instantly caught the rugby
world's eye was that of the Newcastle
Falcons fly-half Jonny Wilkinson. Even
Wilkinson's greatest supporters cannot
argue against his disastrous run of
injuries and the subsequent risk that
would be taken in including him in the
squad, but equally can a player of his
calibre be left at home given his worldbeating qualities? Wilkinson has
proven he is the best fly-half on offer in
the world, let alone the British Isles,
and casting aside his match-winning
potential is possibly a greater risk than
including him at the risk of him being
unavailable. Prior to England’s World
Cup winning campaign in Australia,
Wilkinson orchestrated England’s
remarkable 13-15 vidory away to New
Zealand, highlighting in the process
just how indispensable he is to any
side he is representing.
Woodward has been keen to state that
DIFFERENT FOCUS: The Zurich Premiership
WHILE MOST eyes have been
glued to top-flight football
action recently, a devout
minority
focuses
on
the
permutations of the oval ball at
the business end of the season.
Few could have expected the
intense ending of the Zurich
Premiership this year and who
tops the table and who faces the
drop will be decided on the last
day of the season.
ue, only moving to reject Ferguson's request for them to make an
dal complaint about Chelsea to the Premier League, action that
Arsenal have taken in response to the Ashley Cole affair. They are
obviously mindful of the fact that Ferdinand’s £29.1m move from Leeds
three years ago, which was prompted by a transfer request, and
completed within days, to the bewilderment of then Leeds supremo,
ter Ridsdale, who alleged Ferdinand had been illegally approached,
hey will also be mindful of the transfers of Louis Saha and David
llion, from Fulham and Sunderland respectively, which brought about
accusations that United had broken, in the words of Black Cats' chairman
Bob Murray, “every rule in the book, both written and ethical*. And
perhaps they also recall Ferguson giving Arjen Robben, ironically now a
Leicester and London Wasps, the big
Chelsea player, a guided tour of Old Trafford without United making any boys of the Premiership this season,
pproach to PSV Eindhoven, the club at which he was still under are set fight to the death in their final
Is n tra d .
match with the winner topping the
league and going straight to the final the loser having to wage a dogged
Ferdinand himself should be ashamed of his lack of commitment to a battle through the play-off system at
lub that stood by him throughout his eight month ban, paying him the end of an already taxing season.
£90 ,000 a week in the process. And by no means should Chelsea be
This season has been a made up of
regarded as an innocent party in the whole episode, particularly if they do awesome adventures and competition
intend to lure Ferdinand away from Old Trafford. But to portray United as as is evident from the state of the
the innocent vidims would be to ignore events of the past. If Ferguson league table with five teams,
expects adion to be taken in this instance, he should be prepared for a Northampton,
London
Irish,
full investigation into his previous transfer dealings, and judging by his
board’s readion, that would not be in his best interests.
I
I
if Wilkinson can prove his fitness in
time for the Lions departure, he will be
a welcome addition to the squad, but
the fact he is delaying his decision
shows he has clear doubts over his
star man. The coach is famous for his
mind-games, so Wilkinson’s exclusion
could simply be Woodward's way of
ensuring the Kiwis don’t anticipate his
true game plan and prepare for
another face at fly-half. Given his
recent slow but steady return to the
Falcons first team, it would be no
surprise to see Wilkinson take the
number ten shirt for the first test in
Christchurch on June 25th.
The subject of who would take
Wilkinson’s place should he not prove
his fitness is one of intense debate.
Charlie Hodgson and Ronan O'Gara
have not had the most impressive of
Six Nations campaigns, and whilst
Stephen Jones played a major part in
Wales’ Grand Slam, much criticism
was laid at his door following Wales’
defeat to New Zealand in the Autumn
internationals, in which he missed a
number of crucial goal-kicks which
could have clinched a famous vidory
for the Welsh.
The occupant of the scrum-half
position is another fador in deciding
who gets the number ten jersey.
Woodward has shown faith in exEngland captain Matt Dawson and that
could prove to be a gamble that pays
off with his fiery nature and big game
experience as well as reuniting the
Worcester, Harlequins and Leeds all
within four points of each other and the
danger of relegation still a potential
threat to all.
This is especially the case for Leeds
who, despite recent improved form,
resulting in a resurgence in their
league campaign and miraculously
their Powergen Cup success, lie in
bottom place.
On the back of a thrilling R.B.S. 6
Nations tournament and with the
British and Irish Lions team picked and
set to depart in May, Rugby Union has
reached the mainstream of sports
consumption. With continuous sell-out
Premiership matches, crowds equal
to, if not more than, those of football’s
UEFA Cup matches and an expected
40,000 supporters traveling ’downunder' to New Zealand for the Lions,
rugby union is on an all time high and
can only be seen to advance upwards.
So switch channels this weekend
and tune into the most exciting league
in the world.
By HUGOClARKE_______________
World Cup winning half back
partnership if Wilkinson does make it.
Elsewhere, current Six Nations
champion half backs Dwayne Peel and
Jones look set to start the first match
with new found rugby celebrity and
female fans’ favourite Gavin Henson at
inside centre.
Many critics are unhappy that
Woodward is still keeping faith with his
World Cup winning heroes, particularly
in the back row where he has selected
the infamous trio of Hill, Back,
Dallaglio, despite the latter two having
retired from international rugby. Given
the huge mental and physical
demands of the tour, one can
understand his reludance to introduce
too many new faces for matches that
will surely require more than a little
experience and know-how in order to
be successful.
There are some who can rightly feel a
little disappointed not to be included in
the squad, namely England’s Mark
Cueto, Ireland's Peter Stringer and
Scotland’s Chris Patterson. Cueto in
particular has proved his international
class and his record of 8 tries in 8
games speaks for itself.
Equally, the inclusion of Will
Greenwood, the injury prone lain
Balshaw, and two who have been
overlooked by Andy Robinson for
England, Ollie Smith and Andrew
Sheridan, have caused more than one
or two raised eyebrows.
Despite their impressive Six Nations
Grand Slam the Welsh have just ten
players included, although some argue
even that is too many. They may have
been the best team in the tournament
in terms of consistency, yet Wales
could never be described as a team of
superstars, but rather a hard-working
collection
of
decent
standard
internationals that have been coached
to their strengths as a squad. Think
Everton as a footballing equivalent. In
response to questions relating to the
ratio of players to each country
(England 20, Ireland 11, Wales 10,
Scotland 3), Woodward has stated that
"players have been picked on merit, it
wasn’t about divvying up from each
country; that would be a recipe for
disaster.’’
There is no doubting that if the Lions
are to win this summer against the
odds, Woodward is the man to make it
happen. His track record speaks for
itself and he has never been one to
shun a challenge. England went from
rags to riches under his leadership and
with any luck he can do the same for
the Lions, overcoming Graham
Henry’s New Zealand for the first time
in over thirty years.
PAGE 21/SPORT
n ic n m
Maatfav 14th March 2005
TOON TROUBLE
IIIT Iill
By MICHAEL FRY
TROUBLES ON Gallowgate
seem to be going from bad to
worse these days. The most
recent instalment of the St.
James’ Park soap opera brought
a spat of fisticuffs between
Kieron Dyer and Lee Bowyer
against Aston Villa earlier this
month in one of the most
extraordinary
events
ever
witnessed on a football pitch.
The sight of two team-mates involved
in an on field brawl shocked the nation,
but should we really be surprised?
After all, they are footballers. Without
doubt, immensely gifted people but
when you throw ridiculous amounts of
money at someone who more often
than not comes from reasonably
humble beginnings, it is little surprise
that they act like spoilt adolescents
with more money than they can
possibly spend. Premiership stars and
scandal now go hand in hand, and
nowadays it is more of a surprise to
see a back page relating purely to
sporting matters. The Bowyer-Dyer
debacle, though, ahs attracted so
much attention due to the rarity and
seriousness of such an incident; one
of its' kind has not been seen since
David Batty (ironically a former
Newcastle player) and Graeme Le
Saux came to blows in a European tie
nine years ago.
However, is it really so strange to see
two twenty-somethings getting into a
fight? This is the question that must be
asked. If on the street you saw two
blokes exchanging punches, the most
that you would probably do is laugh
and walk away, or else start egging on
the combatants. Why, therefore is it
disgraceful, and a thousand other
adjectives, when two professional
footballers do it? We can’t blame the
two protagonists any more than we
can blame two people immersed in a
fight in the Bigg Market on a Friday
night. For this type of incident, it’s
v society that we blame. Therefore why
is football, and the milieu that
surrounds it, not to blame for Dyer and
Bowyer’s exchange?
The intensity with which all
competitive football matches are
played today, it shouldn't be too much
of a shock that two team-mates start
grappling, but an inevitability. Perhaps
that sounds a liitle extreme but this
kind of incident has happened before,
and won't shock me if it happens
again, more and more frequently, as
the stakes these players play for,
make
the
game
increasingly
passionate. As in the 19th Century,
football is once again being seen as a
pursuit of the lower classes, and little
gentlemanly courtesy is expected.
From the scenes at St. James' Park a
few weeks ago there's very little to
suggest otherwise. Events at the San
Siro, during the Milanese derby,
highlighted just one of many other
problems faci football at the moment,
this time relating to the conduct of fans
rather than the players. Such scenes
were shocking to many of us, but
flares being thrown onto the pitch is
not an unusual occurrence in Italy, and
while it’s astonishing that more
measures are not taken to prevent
such incidents, that fans behave in
such a way speaks volumes for
football's culture.
Football is proving to be far from a
beautiful game, and I’m not just talking
about Luke Chadwick here. It seems
that dignity, decorum and respect have
disappeared from our national game,
especially when compared to other
sports such as rugby. How often do we
here of crowd trouble in the more
middle-class environment of eggchasing? Obviously fights on the pitch
are far from uncommon but this is the
nature of the game, it’s definitely not
the nature of football.
Football is not solely to blame for
Dyer and Bowyer’s bust up; the latter
must take responsibility for his actions,
and in particular the example he is
setting to the thousands of children
who idolise him. When “anger infests
his simple mind” he just can't help
himself. And that is to say nothing of
his manager, Graeme Souness. Since
Dyer and Bowyer do there impression of Fight Club
the famous disciplinarian took charge
at St. James' the Newcastle team has
become something of a mockery,
making as much front page news as
back. Surely it cannot help the players,
or set any kind of positive example,
when Souness' morality is as dubious
as Bowyer’s, seemingly sympathising
with the former England international a
few days after the incident, “He’s a
buoyant character round the place but
since Saturday he’s been extremely
low. He’ll sleep well after this though.
Lee will be a happy man.” Souness
has always been a controversial
manager, perhaps to be expected from
his
own
playing
days,
but
“controversial” doesn't even begin to
describe his short tenure at St. James'
Park. Arguments with Laurent Robert
and Craig Bellamy have both become
national news, and now this fracas has
made matters so much worse.
Souness was hired not for his tactical
nous or individual flair, but for his hard­
line approach that everyone black and
white believed would curb the
eccentric behaviour Newcastle's prima
donnas. How ironic that matters have
taken such a sharp turn for the worse.
Bowyer and Dyer have since kissed
and made up, and just two days later,
Souness was playing down the
incident claiming all was rosy in the
Geordie garden. But incidents like this
should never occur and while it isn't
really a surprise that tempers become
frayed in the heat of battle, neither
player can have any plausible defence
for their actions. It remains to be seen
whether football cleans up its act but
don't be surprised to see more similar
incidents in the future.
Pakeman speculates on what
might be...
3afa looks like a potato, Jose doesn't.
Stevie G’s joining Chelsea, Frank
.ampard's not joining Liverpool.
Chelsea have Joe Cole, Liverpool
iave Vladimir Smicer. Chelsea are
the Champions, Liverpool might not
even come 4th. How can this possibly
je the Semi-Final of the Champions
League I hear you cry? Between
them, these two they’ve knocked out
the teams top of La Liga, the
3undestiga and Serie A, so you can’t
say they don’t deserve to be there, but
.iverpool haven’t got a chance have
they?
l/Veil this is why they do. Dudek may
be prone to the odd spill, but as
Drogba follows in for a rebound
another red card awaits. Jose will
march down the touchline telling the
media to be quiet, another potential
red. Chelsea need to press but are
scuppered by Makelele's inability to
pass the ball forward. Petr Cech is
due a few mistakes, I mean look at all
the other English clubs keepers in
Europe this season.
Milan Baros
might have a good day (no, really) and
Traore and Gerrard could conspire to
not score an own goal. Alan Hansen
thinks Liverpool are going to beat
Juve, Chelsea and Milan to win the
Champions League. I just hope Igor
Biscan scores the winner.
j|
By SPORTS EDITOR
NICK MEAKIN
THE HEADLINE that adorned last Wednesday’s Telegraph
sport section illustrated the ridiculous level that modem day
football has risen to today. It simply stated: ‘£120,000’, and
then ran two stories on how this amount of money affected
two of individuals, Rio Ferdinand and Alan Ball.
This is a tale of two players, past and present. One, a player who helped
secure the ultimate footballing prize, and now hopes to raise enough
money to secure the long term future of his family by auctioning off his
1966 World Cup winner's medal. And the other a product of the playboy
generation, yet to achieve anything on the international stage, but looking
to increase his already immeasurable wealth.
The value of one of Ferdinand's many sports cars would be enough to
prevent Ball from pawning off his national heirloom, but instead the
Manchester United defender is seeking an extra £30,000 a week to boost
his. already bulging purse.
Whilst Ball is soon to lose all but his own memories of that day in '66,
Ferdinand is ransoming his club, Manchester United, who despite their
undoubted wealth, have supported him throughout a eight-month
suspension and whose fans are currently faced with a 26% price increase
on the cost of their already astronomically priced season tickets. As
players get richer, fans are the ones that end up paying. Never has
football’s inequality been so evident.
In a month of footballing punches, both on and off the pitch (Messrs
Bowyer, Dyer and Rooney, the guilty parties), Ferdinand’s greed is a
another example of how the nation’s favourite
sport is descending into the depths of
immorality and greed. But will this slide ever
end?
In the past two seasons the public have seen
it all. Allegations of sexual assault, drug taking,
prison
sentences,
assaults,
financial
extremities, the list seems depressingly
endless and has become more fantastic than
even a Hollywood script, but will the public ever
turn their backs on the beautiful game and
change the channel?
If they did, they’d see that as football stutters,
many of the nation's other sports are beginning f f O I T I D 3 W I 1 i 11Q
to flourish, and this summer when the another
^
arduous football farce comes to a close focus
should be switched to more pressing and
engaging matters.
England’s cricketers have raised the
performance bar with recent success and this
summer will stand face to face with Australia,
able to challenge them at their own game. International success is leading
to a more appealing domestic game as new, flamboyant players like Kevin
Pieterson ply their trades side by side with world greats like Shane Wame.
Also to rugby, and whilst England's XV are in transition, the domestic
game has never been stronger with three teams reaching the last eight of
the Europe’s Heineken Cup and both first place and relegation being
decided on the last day of the season. Domestic dominance is however but
a mere prelude to the upcoming British Lions tour to New Zealand come
June, which will match two of rugby’s greatest minds, Sir Clive Woodward
and Graham Henry, as well as some of the best talent in the world.
So whilst Ferdinand and friends sun themselves on tropical islands
counting their millions this summer, people should stop and take a look at
what real sportsmen can achieve. Sportsmen and women are role models
as much as they are entertainers, and parents should encourage their
children to look elsewhere for inspiration. Rather than Ferdinand’s fickle
philanthropy, the nation should highlight the courage of snooker player
Paul Hunter as he fights cancer, or the determination of Paula Radcliffe to
pick herself up from her Olympic nightmare or even Dame Kelly Holmes,
who announced an end to her remarkable carer last week.
Football, does and will continue to dominant English sport and culture but
whilst Rio Ferdinand continues to cash such extortionate weekly cheques,
and footballers continue to so show such open social disregard consider
whether it actually really matters any more and if your money is better
spent elsewhere.
“The value
of one of
Ferdinand’s
many sports
cars would
be enough to
prevent Ball
off his
national
heirloom”
■
+
THE COURIER
Manlay 25th April 2005
PAGE 22/UNIVERSITY SPORT
THE COURIER MEETS...
SAM EVANS speaks to Mens Cricket Captain, Al Sinclair, about the season ahead
What are your aims for the season?
Last season we were relegated from the top
flight of the Northern Conference, after
playing just two games due to poor weather.
The main aim is to get the first team
promoted, which I’m confident we will. The
most important thing is that everyone enjoys
their cricket and has a good time.
What are the main strengths of your
team?
The first and second teams are both strong.
Particularly in the first team we have a lot of
all rounders, giving a good selection of
bowlers and batting ability right down the
order. A lot of talented players from last year
have stayed on, and I've also been
impressed with the number of enthusiastic
first years who’ve tried out for the team.
What do you expect the standard of
opposition to be like this year?
We’ve got Sunderland, Hull, York St Johns
and York Uni in our league. We won't
underestimate any opposition, but if
everyone plays to their ability we should
dominate the division.
What qualities do you bring to the team
as captain?
As a player I'd like to think I'm a solid
batsman with good technique. As captain I
hope to bring a positive attitude and sense
of enjoyment.
How has the training been going?
In previous years we’ve trained in Claremont
Sports Centre, but that’s been unavailable
this year. The university made a good
decision in booking nets at South
Northumberland Cricket Club. The facilties
there are great and the staff have been
really helpful. The surface is of very high
quality, there are more nets and in the last
few weeks we have been able to use a
bowling machine to help with batting
practice.
Has the bad weather caused problems
for you in terms of organisation?
The weather has been a big problem in
previous seasons, when many games have
been rained off. BUSA are very rigid in
scheduling, making it difficult for AU staff to
rearrnage games. It can also be difficult
getting people to play as it’s so close to
exams, but we are always competitive, and
hopefully the weather will be good to us in
the next few months.
Who are your personal
heroes?
cricketing
Growing up I enjoyed watching Graham
Thorpe and Robin Smith. It's great to see
England doing so well now, and there a lot of
players to look up to in the current side, like
Strauss, Trescothick, Vaughan and Fiintoff.
The way England have been playing has
revived the public's interest in cricket, and
brought a lot of younger players into the
game. The real test for England though will
come in the Ashes this summer, which
hopefully we’ll win.
4
GALA
GLORY
m uum
By RICHARD RUSSELL
NEWCASTLE SWIMMING Team continued to
show their current magnificent form, taking
home the winners trophy at the annual
Newcastle University Invitational Gala. City
Pool hosted strong teams from Durham,
Edinburgh, Leeds and Manchester, but none
were good enough to take the title off
defending champions Newcastle.
The teams proved to be pretty evenly matched
throughout the early events, making it clear that this
was going to be a very close contest. Not long into the
competition, the ever improving men’s relay team
showed why they are becoming a real force to be
reckoned with, taking 1s* place in the medley relay.
From then on, Newcastle looked settled and started
racking up the points, consistently finishing in the top
three. Notable victories from Richard Russell (100m
How have you fared against the Poly in
individual medley) and Luke Molloy (100m
recent times?
breaststroke) helped give Newcastle a narrow lead at
the half way point, with Manchester and Leeds close
We didn’t get chance to play them in Stan
behind.
Calvert. Our seconds are set to play their
The women’s freestyle relay team then put in an
seconds and thirds in the league on the 4th
inspiring performance, leading right from the gun, only
and 15th of May. Hopefully our first teams
will also meet in a friendly match; last year to be edged out into 2nc* at the finish by just 0.06
they beat us by about 30 runs, so hopefully seconds. Determined to make amends, the men's
freestyle team earned a fantastic victory immediately
this year we can get our revenge.
after, Molloy bringing home the last leg in emphatic
style.
Throughout the remainder of the competition,
Newcastle continued to finish in well and pick up lots of
TOON 3RDS FALL AT
THE FINAL HURDLE
H
1 IY
IIIM
By TIM DEAKIN
Newcastle 3rds 17
Birmingham 3rds 23
The prospect of a place in the final of
the BUSA knock out cup beckoned
for the winner of the match between
Newcastle’s 3rds and an unbeaten
side from Birmingham in the last
week before Easter. Despite the
blustery conditions, the 3rd team
earned their best attendance of the
season as they carried the hopes of
the Rugby club on their shoulders.
In a gruelling match that was fiercely
contested throughout, albeit with the
suspicion of Birmingham fielding
several
ringers,
missed
opportunities sealed the fate of the
Newcastle team and brought their
otherwise outstanding season to a
close.
From the early stages of the match it
appeared that the home team would have to
step up a gear from the standard they had
been used to in the league for much of the
season. It was the referees whistle rather
than the attacking play, however, that broke
the deadlock early on, as the Blues suffered
at the hands of some dubious decisions
leaving them 6 points adrift. The official
awarded two penalties to Birmingham after
he deemed Newcastle to have caused
infringements at the breakdown. While the
Birmingham kicker happily claimed the
points, Newcastle were at a loss as to how
they would be allowed to contest for the ball.
As has been the case for much of the
season, Newcastle found the answer in their
pack.
Despite some controlled possession, the
strong wind continued to cause problems,
as the Newcastle side failed to make use of
their territorial advantage. Two difficult
penalty attempts were blown off course after
leaving the boot of Full-back Andrew
Jennings and the Blues were left with a
mountain to climb. The game was finely
poised for much of the rest of the half until
the final 15minutes saw a flurry of activity
from both teams. Birmingham scored first
with a dazzling 90 metre solo effort from
their winger who cut the Newcastle defence
to ribbons and steamed in under the posts.
Newcastle then showed great character to
points. Sarah Germain helped the cause with 1st place
in the 50m breaststroke, and the mixed team showed
perfect technique as well as speed to bring home an
excellent victory in the difficult ‘crocodile’ relay.
In the end, Newcastle comfortably sealed overall
victory with 115 points, seventeen more than nearest
competitors Manchester. Newcastle were also able to
put out a ‘B-team’, who all swam brilliantly and showed
the full extent of the squad's strength and depth.
Spirited performances by the entire team ensured a
hit back with two tries from James Buncle successful and enjoyable day, and that the trophy stays
and Alex Wiscombe. Wiscombe’s effort in in its rightful place for another year.
particular gave the Blues encouragement
before the break as he showed the
opposition defence to be weaker out wide.
His charge down the touchline bowled over
his opposite man before he muscled his way
through the full back to cross the whitewash. (continued from back page)
fter half time the home side's lapse in
concentration nearly got the better of them who were suspended earlier this year after staff at the
as a quiet half came to life when centre alleged that damage to one of the training areas
Birmingham intercepted a loose pass. The had not been paid for.
pace of winger Dan Glynn cut down the
“A mirror was accidentally broken in November during
centre just inches from the line to save a one of our sessions,* said Dan Stacey, president of the
certain score and keep them within a Thai Boxing club. “We were told that we would be
converted try. From that point onwards the suspended until we paid the fine, but there was along
3rds
pressed
the
Midlanders
line delay in sending the invoice, during which time the
desperately as they searched for the suspension remained. We were informed we could not
winning points. Twice Newcastle unlocked use the facilities because of the broken mirror, but we
the resilient Birmingham defence only to be were also denied access to the gym, which has no
beaten by poor final passes and in the final mirrors anyway. We were told that once we paid the
minute the home team were camped on the fine, the suspension would be lifted immediately, but
Birmingham line to no avail. A frustrating that was not the case, and though it has now been
afternoon saw Newcastle run out losers by lifted, we don’t have the facilities in any case.
23 points to 17.
“As one of the biggest clubs in the university, with
On reflection the 3rds will be happy with a over 200 members, paying over £8,000 in sports centre
season that has gained them a promotion and membership fees, there has been a big uproar
that has included 2 league victories over amongst our members, who feel they have all been
Northumbria and they have certainly left a punished due to the actions of two people.”
lot for next year's side to live up to.
GYM FEES
PAGE 23/UNIVERSITY SPORT
I K COURIER
Monday 25th March 2005
NATIONAL SUCCESS
FOR TOON TAEK TEAM l°N THE
TIE HVtN
By LOUISA O’CONNOR AND
ADAM LEE
NEWCASTLE UNIVERSITY Taekwondo
Club have returned from the Student
National Championships victorious for
only the third time in their history. They
saw off competition from Bristol,
Birmingham, Nottingham and Leeds to
walk home with the team title, with a
massive overall point score of 113
beating their nearest challengers by 35
points.
From the moment the 50-strong team walked
into the competition, sporting their notoriously
recognisable blue jackets, they earned the
nickname "The Army” and a shadow of fear fell
over the rest of the clubs. The other
universities knew we were a force to be
reckoned with and they were proved correct.
The competition opened with Poomse
(patterns) and our medal domination began.
Georgina Bough performed impeccably to earn
a gold medal in the 3rd Kup to 5th Kup
category. Her team-mate, Henry Akinosho,
was also awarded an impressive silver in the
same group. Charlie Jo Devlin battled her way
through some rigorous and intense rounds to
pick up another silver medal in the Dan grade
category. James Cross also performed well
against some strong competitors and earned a
well deserved silver for his patterns in the 4th
to 2nd Kup group.
Having cleaned up in the Patterns, it was on to
the fighting and the most exhilarating and
exciting part of the competition. Jan Chirkowski
fought with such passion and vigour that he
battled his way through five fights to reach the
final in the 5th kup lightweight category. With
some amazing scores achieved with many
memorable hard and fast back leg kicks, his
position in the final fight was well deserved.
With sore feet and near exhaustion, Jan fought
admirably contending with the nerves and
excitement caused by a full house crowding in
to watch the last fight of the day. It was an
exhilarating end to the first day of competition
and Jan was proud to leave with his well
deserved gold medal.
Tamazin Hayler fought through the pain barrier
with a broken hand to fight twice in order to
wear her silver medal with pride. James Cross
once again shone in the ring, displaying first
class technique, which actually forced one fight
to be stopped after he delivered a thunderous
head shot to his opponent, who was unable to
continue. James walked away with another
gold, barely having to break sweat.
Charlie Jo Devlin got back in the ring after
some time off to concentrate on her patterns.
The talent had not disappeared and she
pulverised her two opponents with her
notorious fast back leg, walking off with a gold
to add to her silver medal.
The small but deceiving Georgina Bough
fought three tough and high scoring fights to
pick up another gold to add to the clubs points
and her fighting r6sum6. Hannah Aitken
astounded everyone with her fight score, an
unbelievable 25-1 earned her the gold medal
she deserved so much. The team finished the
day with destruction (wood breaking) earning
two silver medals from Steven Lyndsey and
Seung Yeob Oh.
Newcastle in total came away with 10 gold, 10
silver and 9 bronze medals and victory by a
margin more comprehensive than anyone
could have hoped for. Newcastle won the title
for the first time under coach Adam Lee in 2003
and have been improving ever since, recording
gold medals in every competition attended.
The club boasts over 80 members and trains 3
times a week in Newcastle, growing from
strength to strength every year, as this result
clearly shows.
'The club has done extremely well and I’m very
pleased with all the effort and hard work shown
over the year in order to achieve this result,”
enthused club captain, Adam Lee.
“My goal for next year is to have as many
players make the final, but this time we collect
20 gold medals."
S M I
By FRAN NAISH
NEWCASTLE UNIVERSITY Ski and
Snowboard Club (NUSSC) had
success recently when they won the
BUSC (British University Snowsports
Council) 2005 Championships.
Under the leadership of Pete Thelwell and
Roo Finnlayson and headed by IVY TAYLOR
the Newcastle team were victorious in Risoul.
The second team came 3rd in the parallel ski
slalom while the snowboard team came 4th in
their event. There were top 10 performances
on the ski race piste by Pete Thelwell, Dan
Wyatt and Mhari MacGregor and NUSSC also
won both prizes for the best effort put in by
first time racers. The Newcastle team also
seemed to win the cheering battle, bringing a
louder team of supporters than anyone else.
Having won the championship, it is now the
responsibility of NUSSC to organise the
competition for next year. But this is no
ordinary competition. Organisation of the
event involves coordinating a Christmas and
an Easter University clubs trip, the latter
resulting in over 2000 students taking over a
European ski resort next March. Next year’s
NUSSC executive will be responsible for the
competitions, accommodation and even the
night time events.
Thelwell, NUSSC’s Competition Director
commentated that they "consider [their win] a
great honour as it shows they are the
pinnacle of snowsports within British
Universities.”
ONLY NAOMI!
A.U. Officer elect, Naomi Allum, speaks exclusively to KARL SAUNT on how she plans to take university sport at Newcastle to the next level
NAOMI ALLUM last month secured the
position of next year’s Athletic Union
officer with a record-breaking 677
votes, beating off competition from
four other candidates. An already
enthusiastic Naomi is looking forward
to the massive challenges that lie
ahead in transforming the fortunes of
the university’s sports teams, many of
whom have endured a difficult year. A
gut-wrenching defeat against the Poly
in the Stan Calvert Cup back in
November will be seen by many as the
low point of the season, but in the
words of that living legend D:Ream,
“Things can only get better”.
So where can we expect sport at Newcastle
to go next season? Naomi has high hopes for
success and will be in a great position to
improve the chances of all of our teams.
Following the hard work of current officer, Alex
O’Leary, and other members of the sports
clubs, there will be several ways in which we
can look forward to bringing the glory back to
Toon.
“The obvious new addition to our sports
scene will be the multi-million pound
development on Richardson Road,” said
Naomi. “That will house a new folly-fitted gym
and many other facilities. I’m really confident
that having the right facilities and support for
our teams will make a big difference.”
Taking into account the new gym and the
flood of new talent that is expected in the form
of next year’s freshers, I was keen to find out
what else Naomi had planned for the day to
day running of the sports scene at Newcastle.
Anyone who joined a sports club or society
back in September will probably still be
recovering from the hours spent queuing in the
union building, something which Naomi hopes
will be a thing of the past.
“I’m looking into ways in which this painful
process can be improved, and am particularly
keen to try to pursue ways in which an online
registration system can be set up. Surely
anything that is going to reduce the stress of
signing up for clubs or societies has got to be a
good thing for everyone.”
On a management level, Naomi is also very
keen to increase the flow of information
between the students and the sports centre
and ensure messages are communicated
clearly and regularly. “I am very keen to work
together with The Courier to ensure everyone
knows what is going on in the world of sport at
Newcastle. Finances are also a crucial part of
the general running of all clubs, and I want to
restructure the way cash is distributed to clubs
in order to meet their needs and supply them
with equipment and cash to spend on travel as
they need it. Sponsorship is an important part
of this, and I have already thought about ways
to boost the flow of income into the AU.” Naomi
seems to be more than qualified for this
important role. As captain of the ladies hockey
team this year, she managed to secure a
lucrative £4,000 deal for them back in
September.
The words “Performance Sport” may mean
very little to most of us, but this something that
nine of the top ten universities have, and is
being introduced to Newcastle next year.
Naomi sees this as another crucial factor in
long-term success at Newcastle.
“All clubs will be given the opportunity to
become Performance Sport and if they accept,
they will benefit from expert coaching, physical
and psychological advice and regular
correspondence from the leading coaches and
players in their game.”
Naomi is confident that this is the missing link
to successful sport at Newcastle, and when
implemented will surely boost our chances of
doing well, and also will make sure that Stan
Calvert cup is returned to its rightful home next
November.
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MONDAY 25TH APRIL
GYM PRICES
SET TO ROCKET
EXCLUSIVE
By SPORTS EDITOR
MARTIN CROW
REDEVELOPMENT OF the university’s
gymnasium and sports centre has met
growing
opposition
amongst
Newcastle students, after it was
announced that membership fees are
set to rocket for the next academic
year, in order to fund the project
In addition, members of the gym have voiced
their disapproval at its early closing, denying
them use of the facility since the end of the
Spring term, despite payment of a full year’s
membership in September.
The renovation of the CPRS (Centre for
Physical Recreation and Sport) is designed to
provide our sports clubs with state-of-the-art
facilities to ensure Newcastle retains its status
as one of the most highly regarded universities
in the country on the sports field. But only now
have senior members of staff at the centre
revealed the improvements will come at a cost
to students, who already feel aggrieved at the
loss of the facility so early in this academic
year. Many students joined the centre in
September on the basis that while the gym
would be closed, “limited indoor facilities" would
be available until the new complex was
completed. Despite these claims, however,
students have been forced to look elsewhere
for physical recreation, as NO temporary
facilities have been provided.
“We were looking to re-locate the fitness suite
in the squash courts at Richardson Road,” said
Deputy Director, Colin Blackburn. ‘ However,
the goalposts were moved, and we decided in
%
November that these plans were not possible
i
it# ,
@ 4:
Membership fees could be doubled
as there was not enough space, and we could
not guarantee a safe environment.’'
Despite this, no partial refund was made to
members who have effectively lost use of
sports facilities for five months.
And although Blackburn failed to comment on
the exact cost of membership for 2005/06, he
did indicate there would be a huge increase.
“Members are currently paying £55 for the
whole year for use of the gym. If we double the
prices, they would still only be paying £2 per
week, which is far better value than they would
be able to find elsewhere."
Although the £5.5m project will undoubtedly
provide sports enthusiasts with improved
facilities, a 100% hike in prices is sure to hit
students in the pocket. Asked if
he thought the increase, along
with the relocation of the gym
from King’s Walk, would
dissuade students to join next
year, Blackburn admitted that
“some people would be put o ff
but that students would have to
“make a value for money
decision”.
Many A.U. clubs have also hit
out at rumours they would
have less storage space in the
new facilities than they have
had this year, but Blackburn
claimed that while this might be the case for
some, there would be benefits.
“We have had to say, ’Do we go for big activity
space, or do we go for big storage space?’ and
have tried to find a satisfactory solution. We do
plan to help matters by purchasing equipment
ourselves so that it can be shared by various
‘We
hope to
help
A.U.
clubs as
much as
we can’
The old King’s Walk gym is being converted into a design studio. Its replacement is set to cost
students twice as much as they have paid this year
clubs, which means not only do the clubs make
a saving, but there is less storage space as
three clubs could use the same equipment. We
hope to help clubs as much as we can.”
How does one person manage to have it all?
To find out visit accenture.com/ukgraduates or phone our helpline on 0500 100 189
One club who will hope for better relations
between the centre and societies for next year
is the Thai Boxing club,
(continued on Page 22)
accenture
High performance. Delivered.
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