Day 2 General Session Teen Dating Violence

3/19/16
WalkingwithourHearts,
EmergingBravely
RevealingandHealingChildandYouthSurvivors
ofDomesDcViolenceandTeenDaDngViolence
ThisprojectissupportedbyGrantNo.2014-TA-AX-K047awardedbythe
OfficeonViolenceAgainstWomen,U.S.DepartmentofJusDce.The
opinions,findings,conclusions,andrecommendaDonsexpressedinthis
programarethoseoftheauthor(s)/presenter(s)anddonotnecessarily
reflecttheviewsoftheDepartmentofJusDce,OfficeonViolenceAgainst
Women.
TeenDaDngViolence
DaDngabuse(orRelaDonshipAbuse):Apa`ernof
controllingbehaviorthatsomeoneusesagainsta
girlfriendoraboyfriend.ThecoreofdaDngabuseis
PowerandControl.
•  Itcanincludephysically,sexually,verbally,and/or
emoDonallyabusivebehaviorinadaDngrelaDonship.
•  TDVisnotanargumenteveryonceinawhile,ora
badmoodacerabadday.Itcancauseseriousinjury
andevendeath.
TEEN POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
VIOLENCE
l
se
ica
xu
s
y
ANGER/EMOTIONAL
al
ABUSE:
ph
PEER PRESSURE:
Putting her/him down.
Threatening to expose
someone’s weakness or
spread rumors. Telling
malicious lies about an
individual to peer group.
Making her/him feel bad
about her or himself.
Name calling. Making
her/him think she/he’s
crazy. Playing mind
games. Humiliating one
another. Making
her/him feel guilty.
ISOLATION/EXCLUSION:
USING SOCIAL STATUS:
Controlling what another does,
who she/he sees and talks to,
what she/he reads, where she/he
goes. Limiting outside
involvement. Using jealousy
to justify actions
TEEN
POWER
AND
CONTROL
SEXUAL COERCION:
Manipulating or making threats
to get sex. Getting her
pregnant. Threatening to take
the children away. Getting
someone drunk or drugged
to get sex.
THREATS:
ph
ys
ic a
Making and/or carrying
out threats to do something to hurt another.
Threatening to leave, to
commit suicide, to report
her/him to the police.
Making her/him drop
charges. Making her/him
do illegal things.
l
Treating her like a servant.
Making all the decisions.
Acting like the “master of the
castle.” Being the one to
define men’s and women’s
roles.
INTIMIDATION:
Making someone afraid
by using looks, actions,
gestures. Smashing things.
Destroying property.
Abusing pets. Displaying
weapons.
MINIMIZE/DENY/
BLAME:
Making light of the abuse
and not taking concerns
about it seriously. Saying
the abuse didn’t happen.
Shifting responsibility for
abusive behavior. Saying
she/he caused it.
VIOLENCE
se
xu
al
Produced and distributed by:
Developed from:
Domestic Abuse Intervention Project
202 East Superior Street
Duluth, MN 55802
218.722.4134
4 6 1 2 S h o a l C r e e k B l v d . • A u s t i n , Te x a s 7 8 7 5 6
512.407.9020 (phone and fax) • www.ncdsv.org
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3/19/16
TeenDa'ngViolence
StaDsDcs
•  1in3teensexperiencedaDngviolenceGirlsand
youngwomenbetweentheagesof16and24
experiencethehighestrateofinDmatepartner
violence
•  Suicidea`emptratesaremuchhigherforteens
thatexperienceviolence
•  Only33%ofteensthathaveexperienceddaDng
violencehavetoldanyone
•  ViolentrelaDonshipsinadolescenceincreases
likelihoodofriskybehaviors
(Institute for Native Justice, 2015)
PrevalenceofTDV
•  22%ofallhomicidesagainstfemalesages16-19werecommi`edbyan
inDmatepartner
•  Nearlyone-halfofadultsexoffendersreportcommifngtheirfirst
sexualoffensespriortotheageof18
•  Violentbehaviorocenbeginsbetween6thand12thgrade
•  72%of13and14-year-oldsare“daDng”
•  50%whoexperiencerapeorphysical/sexualabusewilla`emptto
commitsuicide
•  1/3oftheteenswhowereinvolvedinanabusiverelaDonshipconfided
insomeone
•  Theydonotwanttoexposethemselvesorareunawareofthelaws
surroundingdomesDcviolence
AgeatFirstExperienceofInDmate
PartnerViolenceforWomen
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LongTermImpactof
DaDngViolence
•  Fear
•  Injury
•  DoubtofabiliDes,
feelings,and
decisions
•  IsolaDon
•  Shame
•  Sexuallytransmi`ed
infecDon
•  Unwanted
pregnancy
•  Schoolandwork
problems
•  Depression
•  Guilt
(Violence Prevention Works, 2015)
WhyisDaDngAbuse
Prevalent?
•  Genderhierarchies
•  Viewsof“romanDc”relaDonships
•  Inexperience
•  Independence
•  Peerpressure
AftudesimpacDngteen
daDngviolence
•  Beliefthatitisacceptabletouseviolence
•  MostparentseitherbelieveteendaDngviolenceisnotanissue
oradmittheydon’tknowifit’sanissue
•  Amajorityofparentsadmitthey’venotspokentotheirchild
aboutdaDngviolence
•  Adolescentswhoengageinoneproblembehaviorarelikelyto
engageinotherproblembehavior
•  Communitymembersdonotseeitasaseriousproblemora
dangerousproblem
•  Agenciesthatofferresponse/supportocendonotseethe
problemasveryserious
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Understanding
TeenDaDngViolence
Teenda'ngviolencerangesfromemo'onalandverbalabuse
torapeandmurder
•  Adolescentsocenhavedifficultyrecognizingphysicaland
sexualabuse
•  Mayperceivecontrollingandjealousbehaviorsas
signsoflove
•  TeensinvolvedindaDngviolenceseldomreporttheviolence
toaparentoradult
•  ifitisreported,mosttellafriendandtheincident
neverreachesanadultwhocouldhelp
•  StudentscanbeeitherperpetratorsorvicDmsofteendaDng
violence,withsomeyouthbeingbothaperpetratoranda
vicDm.
ImportantFactors
RiskFactors:
ProtecDveFactors:
•  Bullying
•  CulturalorientaDon
•  Delinquency
•  Schoolinvolvement
•  Violenceexposure
•  SocialSupport
ü  Community
ü  Family
•  Aftudeaboutviolence
•  PeerInfluence
•  EducaDon
(Institute for Native Justice, 2015)
WarningSigns
—  ExtremeJealousy
—  Constantput-downs
—  Tellingtheotherpersonwhattodo
—  Explosivetemper
—  Threats
—  Possessiveness
—  PrevenDngtheotherpersonfromdoingwhatheorshewantstodo.
—  Severemoodswings
—  MakingfalseaccusaDonsabouttheotherperson
—  Historyofviolence
—  IsolaDngtheotherpersonfromfamilyandfriends
—  Seekingfinancialcontrolovertheotherperson
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ChallengingIssues
“Aboveall,letussetthechildren
free,breakthetrapsoffearthat
historyhasfashionedforthem.Free
togrow,toseekandquesDon,to
danceandsing,tobedreamersof
tomorrow’srainbows.Andifwebut
givethemourtrust,theywillguide
ustoaNewCreaDon,forloveislife
believinginitself.”
-Manitonquat,WampanoagNaDon
Danger+Opportunity=Crisis
Youngsurvivorsmaybeina
crisissituaDonwhenthey
comeinforadvocacy
•  Varietyofbehaviors:
cussing,yelling,
disrespectullanguage,
self-injuriousbehaviors,
dangeroustoothers
•  Mentalhealthissues
•  Lackofcopingskills
ThisDmeisanopportunity
tobuildtrustandteachskills
•  Don’ttakeitpersonal!
•  Staycalm(deepbreaths,
soctone,staypresent)
•  Setboundaries
•  Givechoices/opDons
•  Listen
•  Helpde-escalate
CrisisResponse
CRISISRESPONSE:Theimmediateshort-termsupportfor
survivorstoinsurethat,physical,medicalandpsychological
needsaremet.
AnAdvocatesroleinacrisisresponseisto:
•  Toreducetheimmediateimpactofthecrisis
•  Toensurethesurvivorunderstandswhattoexpectfromthetrauma
•  Toensuresurvivorchoicesarerespectedandtheyreceiveappropriate
andculturallysensiDveresponses
•  Tohelpthemaccesshealthycopingskills,capitalizingonstrengths,
supportsystemsandresourcesinthecommunity
•  Tohelpthemmovebeyondthecrisissothatshe/hemaygetonwith
his/herlife
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Advocate’sRoleinCrisis
Advocatetoensuresurvivorchoicesarerespectedandtheyreceive
appropriateandculturallysensi'veservicesfromallresponders.This
includes:
•  One-to-onesupportduringiniDalcontact
•  ExplainopDons,rights,relevantprocedures
•  ExplaincommonvicDmreacDonstosexualassaultandconcerns
•  Basicassistance
•  AssistinidenDfyingsafetyopDons
•  AssistanceinidenDfying/arrangingforotherresourcestoreduce
harm/stress
•  Supportandancillaryservicestotheirfamilyandfriends
WhatisNeededinaCrisis
Asurvivorneeds:
•  Trust
•  ClarificaDonofthecurrentsituaDon
•  AnDcipatoryguidanceandrehearsalfor
reality
•  RealisDcreassuranceandsupport
•  DiscussionofplansandopDons,
offeringavailableinformaDon
AdvocateBias
bi•asn:Aninclina'onoftemperamentoroutlook;esp:ahighlypersonal
andunreasoneddistor'onofjudgment:PREJUDICE
6StepstoChangingBias
•  SpendDmereflec'ngonthebiasesthatyoumighthave
•  Considerwhyyoumightbeholdingontoabiasandconfrontit
•  Thebestwaystoeliminateabiasistoproveitwrongthroughpersonal
experienceandengagement
•  Committoexperiencingindividualsnotgroups
•  MaintainconnecDonswithindividuals
•  Discussyourexperienceswithbiasandwithovercomingit
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InterconnectedRelaDonships
WhatifthepracDDoner
respondingis:
•  Family
Howwouldyouasan
advocaterespondto
this?
•  Closefriendofyourfamily
•  Neighbor
•  Family
Whatkindofpolicy
canbeputinplace
withinthetribal
programs?
•  Closefriendofyourfamily
•  Co-worker
Whatiftheperpetratoris:
•  Neighbor
•  Co-worker
•  Triballeader
•  Spiritualleader
Howwillitimpact
thesurvivorseeking
assistance?
Alcoholand
DrugUse
•  NaDvevicDmswhohadbeendrinkingorhighpriortobeing
sexuallyassaultedareoPenstereotypedasindirectlycausing
theirownassaults.
•  VicDmalcohol/drugusesomeDmesbecomesthefocusof
criminaljus'ceinterven'onsratherthanthesexualassault.
•  Diminishedcapacityisavulnerability,notaliability!
SystemIntervenDons
•  Whatdoesitmeanfor
thecriminaljusDce
systemtointerveneina
NaDveperson’slife?
•  DisproporDonate
minorityconfinementin
wheretherearelarger
populaDonsofnaDve
people.
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DiscriminaDonandOppression
Whenamorepowerfulna'on/groupofpeopledominates
aweakerpeopleorna'oninordertostrengthenorenrich
themorepowerfulgroup.
Promotesasetofbeliefswherethevaluesofoneare
consideredsuperiortothoseoftheother.
•  Whatdoesitlooklikeinyourcommunity?
•  Whataretheeffectsofitinyourcommunity?
•  Whatistheimpactinyourcommunity?
TechnologyandTDV
Teenagersdon’talwaysunderstandthatharassingemailsandnastycommentsonsocial
mediasitescons?tuteda?ngviolenceandleadtomuchmoreworrisomeacts.
•  19%ofteenagersreportthattheirpartnershaveusedacellphoneorcomputerto
spreadrumorsaboutthem.
•  Technologyallowscontrollingpartnerstokeeptabsontheirsignificantothers.Status
updatesandotherGPSlocatorsonsocialmediasitesmakesitasimpletask.
•  TeenagersreportthattheirpartnerssomeDmespostinappropriatethingsaboutthemor
theirrelaDonshiponsocialmediasitesorintextmessagesasawayofcontrollingthe
relaDonshipor“gefngeven”withthemforaperceivedwrongdoing.
•  17%ofteensreportthattechnologyhasbeenusedinathreateningmannerintheir
relaDonships,makingthemafraidnottorespondtocellphonecallsandmessages,
emails,orIMs(instantmessages).
•  10%ofteenagersreportthattheyhavebeenthreatenedwithphysicalviolencethrough
technology(textmessage,chatroom,etc.).
TechnologyandTDV
NaDonalTribalYouthLeadershipSummit,SantaFe,NM2010
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TechnologyandTDV
NaDonalTribalYouthLeadershipSummit,SantaFe,NM2010
PhoneSafety
•  VicDmcanturnoffphone-Justbesureparent/guardianknowshowto
getincontactinanemergency
•  Don’tanswercallsfromunknownorblockednumbers
•  AvoidrespondingtohosDle,harassing,abusiveorinappropriatetextsor
messages
•  Saveordocumenttroublesometextsasyoumayneedthemlater
•  Contactphonecompanyorchecktheirwebsitetoseeifnumberscan
beblockedonsurvivor’sphone
•  Avoidusinganyformoftechnologytocontactyourabuser.Itcanbe
dangerousandmaybeusedagainstyouinthefuture
•  Iftheabuseandharassmentdon’tstop,changingphonenumbersisan
opDon
•  DisableGPSlocatorinphone
InternetSafety
•  Onlypostwhatthepubliccanseeorknow
•  ProtectpersonalinformaDon
•  Setboundariesandlimits
•  Keeppasswordsprivate
•  Don’t“checkin”atlocaDons
•  Don’tsayordoanythingonlinethatwouldn’tbedonein
person
•  Don’trespondtoabusivecomments
•  Document
•  Reportabusivebehaviorstositeadmin
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SocialMedia
Socialnetworksareseasonal...
•  MeeDngapps:MeetMe,
Omegle,Skout,Tinder
•  Facebook
•  Instagram
•  TexDngapps:KikMessenger,
ooVoo,WhatsApp
•  Twi`er
•  “Secret”apps:BurnNote,
Snapchat,Whisper,YikYak
•  Google+
•  Tumblr
•  Newplatorms:Sulia,
Sharebloc,Pheed,Bubblews,
Learni.st
•  Vine
•  Pinterest
•  YouTube
•  Acourseofconduct
directedataspecific
personthatwouldcausea
reasonablepersontofeel
fear.*
•  Acrimeinall50states.
•  IsnotjustarepeDDve
behavior
•  Behaviorsarebasedon
context
*LegaldefiniFonsvary.
CommonTac'cs
•  Emails
•  Instantmessaging
•  Threateningitems
•  Unwantedgics
•  Breakinginandmovingitems
•  Surveillance/WatchingvicDm
•  Texts/Calls
•  Voicemails
•  Approaches
PrevalenceofStalking
•  Moststalkingresearchisfocusedonadults(18andup)
•  7.5millionpeoplearestalkedperyearintheUnited
States(CDC,2014)
•  17%ofAI/ANwomenarestalkedintheirlifeDme,
comparedto8.1%inthegeneralpopulaDon(SRC,2002)
•  Ages18-24havethehigheststalkingrates(CDC,2014)
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AdolescentStalking
Stalkinginadolescenceisunder-reportedandocenminimized
becauseofthemisunderstandingsbetweenageappropriate
developmentandharmfulcontact.
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
Threatsandphysicalassaultsoccurinamajorityofcases
OccursinthecontextofteendaDngviolenceandbullying
Ageandgenderaresignificantpredictorsofstalking
MajorityofprotecDonordersnotgranted
SocialmaturityandcogniDvedevelopmentlevels
LimitedrelaDonshipexperience
Strongpeerinfluence
Mediainfluence
WhyisStalkingUnderreported?
“Myparentssaidmyex-boyfriendwouldstoptryingtocontactmeoncehegotoverthebreakup.”
• 
• 
• 
MinimizaDon
•  Privatema`er
Difficulttoprove
•  TechnologymasksidenDty
Eventslook
coincidental
•  JurisdicDonalissues
• 
Disclosuressound
unbelievable
• 
Believenoonewill
help
• 
• 
Normalized
•  Lackoftribalcodesand
protocolofenforcement
•  Parentswillblameor
minimize
•  VicDmfeelscontrol
Parentswilltake
awaytechnology
(NCVC,2014)
HighestDanger
HighRiskTimes
OffenderTraits
•  AcerseparaDon
•  AcerprotecDonorderis
served
•  Offenderhasaloss
•  Escalatedbehaviors
•  Historyofsubstanceabuse
orviolence
•  Behaviorbursts
•  Weapons,vandalism,arson
(SRC,2015)
•  EmoDonaloutbursts
•  Mentalhealthissues
•  Threats
•  Actualpursuit
•  HistoryofviolaDng
protecDveorders
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Sample
TheImpactofStalking
onNaDveYouth
•  Fear/Anxiety
•  Anger/Rage
•  Paranoiaandhyper-vigilance
•  Depression
•  Guilt/Shame
•  Constantstress
•  Self-blame
•  SleepingandeaDngchanges
•  IsolaDon
•  Memoryissues
•  Lowself-esteem
•  ConcentraDonproblems
•  SuicidalideaDon
•  PTSD
•  Withdrawalfromceremoniesor •  Avoidingcommunityevents
spirituality
(PowWows,feasts,etc)
WalkingwithourHearts,
EmergingBravely
12:00–1:30pmLunch
1:30BreakOutSessionC
ThisprojectissupportedbyGrantNo.2014-TA-AX-K047awardedbythe
OfficeonViolenceAgainstWomen,U.S.DepartmentofJusDce.The
opinions,findings,conclusions,andrecommendaDonsexpressedinthis
programarethoseoftheauthor(s)/presenter(s)anddonotnecessarily
reflecttheviewsoftheDepartmentofJusDce,OfficeonViolenceAgainst
Women.
12