LC Basketball Teams Sweep ODAC Championships

Critograph
critograph.com
Volume 100, Issue XXII, 3.2.16
THE STUDENT VOICE OF LYNCHBURG COLLEGE
LC Basketball Teams Sweep ODAC Championships
Men’s and Women’s teams make history in Salem.
By Ryan Henson
sports editor
Men’s and Women’s basketball teams celebrate ODAC championships Feb. 28. Photo by Gracie Withers.
The Lynchburg College Men’s
and
Women’s
basketball
teams captured Old Dominion
Athletic Conference (ODAC)
championships
Feb.
28.
The Men’s basketball team
defeated
Hampden-Sydney
College 90-67, Emory and
Henry College 94-64 and
Randolph College 62-60. The
Women’s team triumphed over
Virginia Wesleyan College
73-51, Washington and Lee
University 71-57 and Guilford
College 62-55.
In the first game against
Virginia
Wesleyan,
the
Women’s team got off to a
slow start and was tied at 16
at the end of the first quarter.
During the second and third
quarter, LC outscored Virginia
Wesleyan by 19 points in route
to a victory. Senior forward
Chaney Forbush led the team
with 20 points and sophomore
forward Caroline Naumann
recorded 17 points and 11
rebounds. Against Washington
See ODACS page 8
Campus News
Cabaret
Page 3
Local News
Tornado Relief
Page 5
Nerd Factor
Telepathy
Page 6
Campus News
2
The
Critograph
2015-2016
Editor-in-Chief
Alexa Nash
Copy Desk Chief
Rob Carter
Sports Editor
Ryan Henson
Assistant Editor
Brittany Peck
Copy Editor
Hunter Tyson
Online Editor
Jewell West
Multimedia Editor
Lynn Walsh
Lead Graphic Designer
Taylor Haney
Graphics Assistant
Ryan Creasy
Marketing &
Advertising Manager
Mariah Burgess
Circulation Manager
Jacquan Hargraves
Faculty Advisor
Agatha Rule,
Communication Studies
What do you think phone groping means?
Urban Dictionary Definition: That moment when you lose your phone and you
immediately freak and start groping yourself to find it.
March 4
Aurous: LC Journal of Visual
Arts and Creative Writing
Submission Deadline
Joke of the Week
” When you feel like your
phone is ringing so you
reach around to see if it’s
vibrating.”
- Joshua (Josh) Sheetz,
What is the difference
between a greyhound
bus station and a
lobster with breast
implants?
Answer:One is a crusty
bus station & the other is
a busty crustation.
The Critograph
1501 Lakeside Drive
Lynchburg College, Schewel
Hall Newsroom 116
Lynchburg, Virginia 24501
434.544.8301
critograph@lynchburg.edu
critograph.com
March 2
Open Forum with Dean
of Students CandidateDrysdale, 7 – 8 p.m.
March 6
Midterm Vacation
Quaker Meeting- Center for
Spiritual Life, 10:30-11:30 a.m.
InFaith Campus Protestant
Worship- Sydnor
Performance Hall, 3-4p.m.
Roman Catholic MassSnidow Chapel,
4:30-5:30 p.m.
“Using your phone as a
sex toy. “
-Maria Mora, first-year
All copy, photographs, and
graphics are the sole property of
The Critograph and may not be
reproduced without the specific
consent of the Editor in Chief.
Letters to the editor must be
received by 6 p.m. on Sundays.
Submitted letters are limited
to 250 words or less and must
include name, address, and a
current email address or phone
number. Letters should be sent
to
Critograph@lynchburg.edu..
Contact Us
Upcoming Events
March 5
Midterm Vacation
“Someone groping you
while you’re on your
phone. “
-Akossiwa (Elise)
Togbe, sophomore
The Critograph is the official
Lynchburg College student news
and information source, published
weekly during the fall and spring.
If you have a correction or clarification,
e-mail
Critograph@lynchburg.edu.
If you are interested in placing an
advertisement in a print issue or
online, please e-mail Critograph@
lynchburg.edu, ATTN. Heather Mazur.
To see our latest issue and archives
visit critograph.com.
Word Dell
on
the
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
“When you touch your
phone a lot. “
- Sarah Hammock,
first-year
Photos by Kelvin Whitehurst.
Security Blotter
Thursday, February 25
Larceny (Petit<200), McWane Hall, student left wallet on couch and returned
to find it missing
Friday, February 26
Vandalism, Peaksview Front Parking Area, jeep intentionally scratched by
female with scissors
Sunday, February 28
Dating Violence Delayed report, Off Campus, Student assaulted by nonstudent who continues to contact student
Security Blotter reprinted verbatim from online
campus crime log.
Source: Harrison Smith
Hey LC,
After a gorgeous day of 70-degree weather, I think we’re all
ready for Spring Break. Before you pack your bags and go to
somewhere warmer, literally or metaphorically, take a look at Issue
22. First of all, congratulations to both of our basketball teams for
their wins! Other campus events we cover includes the spring
musical and a poetry competition for the lexicon-inclined. We
have a bit of local news; staff writer Kelvin Whitehurst covered
the tornado relief in Appomattox, and Copy Desk Chief Rob
Carter wrote a piece on our eventful and slightly dangerous trip to
Richmond to cover the Clinton campaign as student journalists.
Ever had a question, comment or story you want to see in The
Critograph? Send us a Letter to the Editor and see it published.
Spark conversation; create change.
Enjoy the break, and don’t forget the sunscreen, folks.
See ya around,
Alexa Nash, Editor-in-Chief
Campus News
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
3
The Weekend Belonged to Cabaret
By Kelvin Whitehurst
staff writer
Last week Feb. 25-28, the
Lynchburg College Theatre
Department
presented
“Cabaret: A Musical” in
Dillard Theatre.
The play was directed by Jeff
Wittman, a theatre department
professor at LC. The play
starred students sophomore
Sydnee Smith, senior Matthew
Tatom, sophomore Georgie
DeCosmo, sophomore Logan
Wagner, senior Grace Parker,
sophomore Nathan Hopkins,
sophomore
Elle
Evans,
sophomore Jimmi NelsonReid, senior Cody Payne
and featured multiple other
students who performed as
the ensemble and Kit Kat
Klub Girls.
Behind the scenes of the
show were the production
staff, which included faculty
and staff, notably Christopher
Otwell, assistant professor and
designer/technical
director,
and two senior student staff
members, Acey Hotchkiss and
Tyler Barrett, used the show as
their senior project.
“Cabaret versus what came
before [referring to “A Piece
of My Heart”], it’s a fairly
heavy… musical, we wanted
to approach… something that
was historical and real,” said
Wittman. “This is not ancient
history what we saw, this was
World War II or the lead-up or
run up to World War II, in 1929
and 1930 Berlin.”
Auditions were held last
November
for
“Cabaret”
cast. Since auditions practice
for the show started Jan.
9 and continued through
Feb. 24, totaling nine weeks.
Throughout this time period,
the team faced obstacles such
as weather.
“The major obstacle that we got
over, I think we got over in an
excellent fashion was snow…
We lost four rehearsals and
backstage days due to snow,”
Wittman said.
The team overcame this
obstacle
by
attending
rehearsals on weekends and
outside of class all approved
by Vice President and Dean for
Academic Affairs Sally Selden.
The show sold near 830 tickets
in total. Saturday, Feb. 27 was
the only night that seats were
sold out.
“There was not a seat to be
had,” Wittman said.
The next shows held by the
Theatre Department will be
“No Exit,” “Morning Coffee”
and Dance Works, which will
all be held this winter semester.
The “Cabaret” cast poses for photo opening night Feb. 25.
Photo courtesy of Lynchburg College Theatre Department.
The Academy of American Poets Welcomed
By Brittany Peck
assistant editor
The first submission period
for the University and College
Poetry Prize program, a
competition sponsored by the
Academy of American Poets,
at Lynchburg College ends
March 2.
In order for a college or
university to have submissions
accepted by the Academy of
American Poets they must
first have a $5,000 endowment
contribution made. It is for this
reason that, Assistant English
Professor, Allison Wilkins
told her nature writing class
that being able to have this
competition at LC was a big
step for the institution.
“This means that someone
had to ask about Lynchburg
College,
specifically,
and
choose to donate in our honor,”
she said.
LC then sets a deadline,
submission preferences and the
openness of the program. LC
chose to limit the submissions
to three poems and five pages
in length, but allow both
undergraduate and graduate
students to participate.
In order to participate, the
poems must be submitted in
the box in front of the English
office in Carnegie Hall and each
poem must have the student’s
name, mailing address, email,
phone and birthday on their
page.
After submission the poems
are read by a group of judges
at the school which consists of
Wilkins, English professor Dr.
Alan Dickson and assistant
English professor Nina Salmon.
The judges will then send
their commentary to the
Academy of American Poets
who will send out letters of
congratulations to both the
winner and honorable mention,
during the spring semester, as
well as send the winner a $100
check and a year membership
with the Academy of American
Poets. The winner will receive
the biannual journal American
Poets with this membership
and will be mentioned in the
Academy’s Annual Report for
winning.
Past winners of the
University and College Poetry
Prize program include: Diane
Ackerman, Gregory Orr, Sylvia
Plath and Charles Wright.
Each of these renowned poets
were first recognized through
this program, but the list of
winners, since 1955, is nearly
10,000 across the United States.
The program sponsors over
200 annual poetry prizes at
colleges and universities across
the U.S.
The Critograph is
looking for talented
writers and
bloggers to add to
our news team! If
you’re interested
in learning how to
write news articles,
attend our interest
meetings every
Wednesday at 7pm
in Schewel 116.
Opinion
4
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
Editorial: Critograph Reporters’ Twisted Trip
By Rob Carter
copy desk chief
Three student reporters from
Lynchburg College left for
Richmond around 3 p.m. on
Wednesday Feb. 24 and were
faced with more reporting
than they expected.
As Alexa Nash, Kelvin
Whitehurst and I were driving
down highway 460 east we
were stopped by a long line
of slow moving traffic about
45 minutes into our trip.
We tried to look down the
road to figure out what had
happened, because we were
on our way to see former
President Bill Clinton speak at
the Hippodrome and did not
want to be late. We began to
see debris littered across the
fields around us as well as in
the highway, and through the
pouring rain we were finally
able to see a house that had one
side of it completely ripped off
and its roof caved in.
The three of us were aware
of the tornado warnings, but
never imagined we would
see any of the destruction.
Instinctively,
Kelvin
got
out of the car and began to
wander around the highway
in search of answers about
what happened and what was
going on. Emergency vehicles
arrived on the scene to help
anyone affected by what we
would then learn was a F3
tornado. An F3 tornado is
defined by NOAA as, “Severe
damage. Roofs and some
walls torn off well-constructed
houses; trains overturned;
most trees in forest uprooted;
heavy cars lifted off the ground
and thrown.” Kelvin was
able to speak to an Evergreen
resident, Mark Johnson, who
was standing near his ruined
home. He said he saw the
tornado touch down as he
A patch of trees destroyed the F3 tornado that swept through Evergreen, Virginia Feb. 24. Photo by Kelvin Whitehurst.
rushed his family inside the
house and down into the
basement shortly before the
house was torn apart.
Once the emergency vehicles
were able to reach the scene
and
organize
themselves
and those on the highway,
we carefully navigated our
way around downed trees
and other debris in the road
to continue our journey. The
three of us were met with a
confusing range of emotions
from terror of being swept
away ourselves, to sadness for
those who lost their homes
and excitement about having
a new story to report. Just like
a professional reporter, Kelvin
logged onto The Critograph
Facebook page to report the
news we had and was able to
post a quick summary of what
we had seen and a couple of
photos showing the damage
to houses and the debris on
the road.
The rest of the drive was
significantly less eventful as
we approached Richmond. We
considered turning around but
decided we still had to report
on B. Clinton’s speech. We
arrived in Richmond around 6
p.m. and to our concern the city
was blaring what sounded like
its emergency warning sirens.
Hurricane-like conditions blew
through the parking lot we
were sitting in, trapping us in
the car until we were sucked
up over the city or the weather
calmed down. Eventually it
did calm down enough for us
to brave the streets. There were
very few other people out with
us and the sirens were still
blaring, but after getting a little
lost and jumping over many
puddles we finally made it to
the Hippodrome to wait for the
former president to speak.
The Hippodrome was packed,
with what looked like close
to 250 people, most of them
soaking wet from waiting out
in the rain. Alexa heard from
an organizing official that the
Hippodrome was very close
to capacity. We grabbed a
spot in the press section at the
back of the venue and began
to organize ourselves for the
speech. We were not aware
that former President Clinton
had not even landed at the
Richmond airport yet due to
the storm, and were forced to
wait for close to an hour until
he arrived. While we waited
we
introduced
ourselves
to nearby New York Times
reporter. We told her a little
about our plans as journalists
and she gave us her business
card as well as some advice on
how we could help ourselves in
this vastly changing industry.
Around 7 p.m., the former
president finally arrived on
stage to deliver his speech
about his wife, democratic
presidential nominee Hillary
Clinton. He spoke about a
number of different issues
from health care and student
loans to foreign policy. Many
of his points about Hillary
were closely related to projects
and policies he completed as
president and ensured the
audience that voting for her
would lead to similar economic
success. He did not name
any republican candidates
explicitly, but did point out the
many differences in the two
parties regarding the issues he
was speaking about. He also
added some bipartisan ideas
that Hillary is supporting as
well as many of her previous
accomplishments
in
the
White House.
After the speech ended
around 9 p.m. the rain had
almost come to an end and
the wind had died down to a
low breeze. We talked with a
few Virginia Commonwealth
University graduates on our
way out to the car who agreed
with many of Hillary’s policy
changes for student loans
that would allow students to
refinance their loans similarly
to a mortgage. With our last
piece of work for the night
finished, we drove up to Cary
Street to grab a quick bite to
eat at the Galaxy Diner. We
talked about everything that
had happened that day, Kelvin
tried his first fried pickle
and we then headed home
arriving in Lynchburg around
12:30 a.m.
Local News
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
5
Appomattox Tornado Relief Report
By Kelvin Whitehurst
staff writer
A thunderstorm that bred
tornados
swept
through
Appomattox, Va. Feb. 24
that left extensive damage
in its wake, especially in the
Evergreen area.
Highway 460 East was littered
with trees, branches and debris
from housing and surrounding
structures.
First
response
arrived to help possible injured
citizens, direct traffic and move
debris which blocked the road
backing traffic for half a mile.
The News and Advance
reported that the tornado
destroyed 200 homes and left
375 people displaced.
Mark Johnson was a resident
of the area destroyed by
the tornado.
“Tornado watches had just
came up, and I looked out
the back window, and seen it
touched down on the backside
and rushed everybody down
into the basement... and this is
the aftermath.” Johnson said.
“This is one of the larger
tornados I’ve responded to,”
State coordinator Jeffery Stern
said. “…Nothing beats being on
the ground and shaking hands
and making sure the needs
of these citizens are met,”
Stern said.
The day after the storm
hit, Kaitlyn Lowery, a firstyear student at Lynchburg
College, requested aid from
students to provide relief
to the families affected by
the storm by providing
non-perishable items.
Fellow Virginians such as
Lowery, are all joining together
to help the counties affected
by the storm. Gleaning
for the World, a non-profit
organization, has been actively
helping the victims by asking
the communities of Lynchburg
and Roanoke help provide
relief that has since expired.
Other organizations involved
in providing shelter or helping
rebuild are American Red
Cross, the Appomattox County
Emergency Shelter and God’s
Pit Crew.
Clinton’s New College Compact
By Alexa Nash
editor-in-chief
Former president Bill Clinton
made a stop in Richmond, Va.
to campaign for democratic
presidential candidate Hillary
Clinton before the Super
Tuesday Virginia primary
March 1.
He discussed many aspects
of Hillary Clinton’s plan, but
education was an emphasis
as he explained the New
College Compact and why it
is necessary.
“You have all of these young
people that have gotten out of
college with tons of debt, and
they don’t think they’ll be able
to pay the debt, so they move
back into their parents’ house,”
Bill Clinton said. “Then you
have all of these students that
are in college, in and out in
and out, that can’t pay without
borrowing money and they’re
worried about it.”
According to hillaryclinton.
com, the plan allows students
to attend a four-year college or
university without having to
take out loans by issuing grants
to states to invest in public
colleges and universities. This
way, it will lower total costs and
increase graduation rates, as
students will be able to afford
to attend and remain in college
to complete their education.
The New College Compact
will cost $350 billion over 10
years, paid for by closing tax
loopholes and expenditures for
the richest citizens.
Bill Clinton stated that tuition
will be free for middle and lower
class students, a statement that
conflicted Hillary Clinton’s
previous comments, and will
lower the cost of textbooks and
living expenses. Each student
will be given access to a workstudy position, and is expected
to work up to 10 hours per
week, which is one way he or
she will supplement costs.
“Higher income people should
pay their own way,” the former
president said.
Currently, Congress sets the
interest rates for college loan
debt. It is nine percent Bill
Clinton said, and continued
to explain that a citizen can
refinance a home for less than
four percent.
“A college loan is the only kind
of loan you can’t refinance. Its
nuts,” Bill Clinton said. “Let
everyone graduate from college
debt free.” If every college loan
in America was refinanced, it
would save 25 million students
$2,000 each.
Bill Clinton underlined the
fact that college loans should
be refinanced like a home
mortgage.
“You will never be able to not
pay; you won’t have to default,
you can move out of your
parents’ home and get your
own apartment. If you’ve got
a great idea for a new app you
can go and get a small business
loan and it won’t count against
your credit,” he said. “It’ll
be the best money you’ve
ever spent.”
The New College Compact
also includes plans to simplify
FAFSA and build on TRIO
and GEAR UP, both plans
for
disadvantaged
and
low-income students.
Institutions will also be
required to have transparency
on graduation rates, likely
earnings of graduates and
student debt so that potential
students can easily compare
the rates of one institution
to another.
The New College Compact
will create an income-based
repayment plan so that
graduates pay at most 10
percent of their income towards
student debt. Hillary Clinton
also plans to enact a Borrower
Bill of Rights, which promises
accurate and timely advice on
repayment options, according
to hillaryclinton.com.
“This is a good deal, and it
would get rid of this anxiety
and allow people to go get
their degree… I think that
is really, really important,”
B. Clinton said.
Half of the $350 billion will
go towards grants to states, one
third will go towards relief of
interest on student debt and
the last portion of funds will
go towards innovation.
Week in
Review
Ashley Guindon, a Prince
William
County
Police
Department officer was fatally
shot Feb. 27 in Woodbridge,
Va. Guindon was answering a
domestic call, which was her
first call on the job after taking
the oath of office Feb. 26.
Ronald Hamilton is accused of
killing Guindon as well as his
wife and wounding two other
officers who responded to the
call. Hamilton is an active duty
Army staff sergeant assigned
to the Pentagon.
In a new study scientist
have found that the brain has
different traits, which affect
the anatomical and cogitative
abilities of an individual. These
traits predict a person’s general
intelligence and memory. The
researches described the brain
as “as different as faces,” but
they argue that the research
gathered helps develop an idea
of what the normal brain is.
The 2016 Python challenge
came to a close Feb 14 in Florida
with 106 invasive Burmese
Pythons removed from the
Everglades. The largest snake
measured in at 15 feet long and
one man captured 13 pythons,
the most by any individual in
the competition.
Over the past few years
Google has been developing
a self-driving car and on Feb.
29 one of the cars had its first
accident when it collided with
the side of a bus. The Google
vehicles have driven 1.4
million miles and have been
in 17 other crashes, non-ofwhich were its fault. The crash
was minor and there were no
injuries. Google still has a lot
to develop if they are going to
meet their goal to roll out their
self-driving vehicles by 2020.
As of press time, Hillary
Clinton won the Virginia
democratic
primary
and
Donald Trump won the
Virginia republican primary.
Nelson, Appomattox, Amherst,
Bedford
and
Campbell
counties were won by Clinton.
Trump had also won all of the
aforementioned counties.
Information compiled
from various sources.
Opinion
6
LC in History
Southern Spring Break
By Dr. Clifton W. Potter
LC History Professor
All during the dark cold days
of January and the uncertain
weather in February both
faculty and students’ dream of
semester break and escape—
either from the daily routine
of preparing for classes and
grading papers, or from
Lynchburg College and Central
Virginia.
Some fortunate
members of the faculty will be
able to travel to faraway places,
but most of us will stay at home
and finish midterm grades.
Some students, the lucky ones,
will be easily distinguished by
their new suntans and the bags
under their eyes due to lack of
sleep. Has it always been so?
The answer is no.
Personally when I was a
student, I never went anywhere
during spring break except to
work earning extra funds for
the last half of the semester.
There were students who lived
in Florida, and they would take
friends home with them during
the holiday. However by my
junior year the mass exodus
south had begun and films
with titles like “Where the
Boys Are” only increased the
numbers of those looking for
“adventures” far from parents
and the Dean of Women. My
senior year, one of our elected
leaders was arrested in Fort
Lauderdale for refusing to
descend from a telephone pole
that he had climbed to get a
better view of the riot that was
in progress below him. He
was released without being
charged, and only received a
stern reprimand never to do it
again.
In the 1970s, the number
of LC students traveling to
Florida increased. Each year
rumors would circulate on
the activities of these sun
worshippers—wet tee shirt
contests and something called
the “wet willie” contest.
One young man returned
to campus as the national
champion in this rather
dubious activity. He is now a
respected businessman, and
I trust his trophy is carefully
hidden in the attic. Several
years ago one of my students
headed to Fort Lauderdale
with several of her friends and
her mother who had made the
same pilgrimage a quarter of a
century earlier. This proved to
a “life-changing” experience
for both of them. The student
finally learned why she had
never been able to do anything
without her mother catching
her.
Mom had already
done it all and knew all the
telltale signs!
Photo retrieved from mtv.com.
In the 1980s Florida became
passé, our students started
to haunt the islands of the
Caribbean and the coast of
Mexico. Then in the 1990s some
of the more adventurous opted
for travel to Europe, Asia or
Africa on college sponsored
study tours. However, most of
our students still return home,
spend a week with family and
friends and perhaps earn a
little extra spending money
by working at what would be
their summer job.
The real change in semester
breaks occurred with the
arrival of Serve. Now some
students devote their long
awaited vacation to serving
others by working on various
projects to benefit those who
are less fortunate. Dr. and
Mrs. Hopwood would be very
proud of them; it fulfills part of
their dream for their college.
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
Nerd Factor
Telepathy: It’s Not What You Think
By Dr. Mike Robinson
LC Communication
Studies Professor
Ask most people for their
favorite
superpower
pick
and you often get something
physical like flight, superspeed
or even invisibility. Telepathy
is a popular choice too. The
appeal of reading minds
and
projecting
thoughts
is strong.
But there are
massive drawbacks for the
telepathic superhero:
You Know What People are
Thinking: Okay, that seems
pretty obvious. It’s the main
attribute of the power right?
But the problem here is that a
telepath ALWAYS knows what
other people are thinking.
Throughout popular culture,
mind readers are shown
struggling to learn how to
shut out the din of all other
thoughts. But once that skill is
achieved, the telepath would
realize that most thoughts
are kind of dull. Right now,
everyone around you is
thinking more about daily
stressors or pesky problems.
Worse still, a telepath pierces
through the veil of polite white
lies that keep our social world
ordered.
Telepathy Never Looks Cool:
No superhero should be in
the job for the praise alone,
but hey, everyone likes a little
public
acknowledgement
now and again. But nobody
is going to be impressed by
a telepath. When folks like
Spider-Man or Daredevil bust
up a bank robbery, there’s all
this fancy acrobatics and witty
repartee as the heroes bound
around the space. A telepath
could stop the whole situation
without nearly as much fuss
just by mentally suggesting
that each crook go to sleep.
There’s not much wow factor in
that. In the history of comics,
no bystander ever ran up to a
telepath and said “Hey, way to
stare them down!”
You’re the Team Switchboard:
It’s the X-Men’s fault for
popularizing this strategy, but
every team with a telepath
nowadays insists upon secret
mental
communication
between team members. It’s
a cool plan because it flusters
villains to no end. A baddie
can’t hear the plans being
shouted out and also gets
clocked by a bunch of people
who aren’t talking. But who
wants that job? It’s like being a
phone operator in the old days.
“Hello, Mr. Batman, you have a
thought? Yes, I’m patching you
over to Mr. Aquaman now.” If
that’s your job, might as well
call yourself The Router.
Migraines: I suppose even
Captain America gets sore
muscles from time to time,
but the main aftereffect of
telepathy is constant, blinding
headaches.
Telepaths are
always falling over, clutching
their heads and howling in
pain. It’s a wonder most of
them aren’t pain pill addicts.
Involuntary
Baldness:
Speaking of heads, ever
notice how most telepaths are
chrome domes? Okay, let’s be
careful here to avoid prejudice.
There is nothing wrong with
baldness. But some people
chose baldness while others
have baldness thrust upon
them. Perhaps the telepathic
brain literally heats up, but
characters
like
Professor
Xavier and Moondragon don’t
seem to be able to grow any
hair. Now I know what you
are thinking-- what about Jean
Grey or Psylocke? Sure, these
women have long hair. But
they’re also telekinetics. That
power must subtly keep their
hair growing.
Constant Ethical Debates:
As a career, superheroism is
fraught with moral choices.
But just about everything the
telepath does to others, by
definition, is simultaneously
an invasion of privacy and
a violation of free will. The
whole process must be so tiring
that a telepath must want to
turn his or her brain off.
7
Opinion
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
Sports Junkie
NFL Combine Physical Tests Don’t Measure Up
By Ryan Henson
sports editor
NFL
coaches,
scouts,
executives, media and many
more gather each year at
the NFL scouting combine
to evaluate about 300 draft
eligible players. The players
are assessed with physical
and mental tests including
the 40-yard dash, bench press,
interviews, injury medicals
and an IQ test. But do all
these tests really matter when
it comes to playing football?
Because an NFL player never
runs 40 yards straight down
the field wearing no pads. Each
year there are players who
fail to impress at the combine
but turn into NFL stars and
vice versa.
The physical measures at the
combine are very overrated
and should be viewed as
insignificant compared to the
intelligence and intangibles
that NFL teams learn about the
players during the interview
process. Four-time Super Bowl
champion Tom Brady was
historically un-athletic at the
NFL combine and ran one of
the slowest 40-yard dash times
among quarterbacks. He ended
up being the 199th overall pick
in the 2000 NFL draft because
teams just thought he was
not physically gifted enough.
Teams were not able to evaluate
his leadership and ability to
perform in the clutch that
made him one of the greatest
quarterbacks of all time.
Tom Brady is not alone when
it comes to players who were
poorly evaluated at the NFL
combine. Two-time Associated
Press Player of the Year and
Super Bowl champion Drew
Brees’ draft stock was hurt at
the NFL combine because his
height was measured at just six
feet tall, which is considered
short for quarterbacks. Terrell
Suggs has made six Pro Bowls
and recorded over 100 sacks in
his NFL career. However, he
ran a slow 40-yard dash and
did not record many bench
press reps which caused him
to fall in the NFL draft.
At the Senior Bowl in January,
quarterback Brandon Allen’s
hands were measured at eight
and a half inches which is
considered small and not good.
For this
week’s complete
Sports Junkie,
visit
Critograph.com.
Satire: Call Your Mother, This is Your Last Warning
By Kelvin Whitehurst
staff writer
Getting deeper into the school
year, first-year student Robert
Willis has forgotten about the
ability to call his family who
only request he calls every
other week.
“I know this is an extreme
to call you out on your school
newspaper, but I don’t really
care. Robert, it has been a month
since you have last called your
family. How do you expect us
to keep sending you money for
your weekend ventures, if you
never call or ask what’s going
on in your family who misses
you?” Gladyss Willis, Robert’s
mother questions while wiping
tears from her eyes. “It’s just
getting ridiculous now.”
“I know I can’t call them,”
said Willis, continuing on to
further say that whenever he
calls his parents conversations
go on much longer than he
intends them to go.
“My mother always asks,
‘Did you shower?”’ or ‘Did you
wash your underwear?’ Like,
yes Mom, I did.” Willis then
goes to spray his canister of
Axe Dark Temptation on his
body that hasn’t experienced
any sort of contact with a
shower since last rainfall.
“I told him not to call me if
he needs any money, that’s for
him to speak to his Mom for.
I don’t really mind if the boy
calls back or not, he’s grown.
If the boy stinks, he stinks. I
think Gladyss is overreacting,”
Willis’s father says, while
receiving a stern look from
Gladyss, her eyes say, “I’m
going to kill you later.”
“If Robert doesn’t call back
by the end of this week, he
will not be receiving any more
money from the great family
bank of Willis, I’m worried and
I want to make sure my Robbyboo is okay,” Gladyss remarks
furiously.
Drew Brees runs a 40-yard dash during the 2001 NFL
Combine. Photo retrieved from nfl.com.
Sports News
8
ODACS
and Lee, the Hornets made
42.9 percent of their shots
compared to the General’s
shooting 32.8 percent. Forbush
and Naumann each scored
16 points to lead the team
while also tallying 11 and 14
rebounds respectively. Senior
guard
Sammi
Goldsmith
recorded 10 points and seven
rebounds to help LC advance
to the championship.
In the ODAC Women’s
basketball
championship
game, the duo of Forbush and
Naumann led the Hornets with
14 and 15 points respectively.
Naumann added 18 rebounds
to record her third doubledouble in the tournament,
as she went on to earn Most
Outstanding Player.
At halftime the Hornets were
trailing 26-25 but they seized
the lead early in the third
quarter and lead the rest of
the game. LC out-rebounded
Guilford 45-34 and recorded
six more assists. Junior guard
Sarah Coronel recorded 10
points and was named to
the ODAC All-Tournament
Team along with Forbush
and Naumann. LC Women’s
basketball earned their first
ODAC title in school history
while also improving their
record to 24-4 and 14-2 in
ODAC games.
“It truly is an honor to be
a part of this team. We have
worked so hard this season,
and being a member of the
first team to win an ODAC
championship is tremendous
and I am very grateful. We
were determined to make
history this weekend, and to
be able to be a part of that is
amazing,” Naumann said.
The LC Men’s basketball team
defeated Hampden-Sydney in
their first game of the ODAC
tournament without trailing
at any point in the game. The
Hornets made 32 of their 64
shots including 12 of their 27
from three-point range. Senior
forward Alex Graves led the
team in points and rebounds
with 16 and 10 respectively.
Junior guard, Lyndon White
contributed in many ways with
12 points, seven rebounds and
seven assists. In their second
game of the tournament, the
Hornets outshot the Wasps en
route to a dominating win. In
just under a five-minute span
sophomore guard Bobby Ford
took five three-point shots and
made each one of them to put
LC up 36-11 with eight minutes
left in the first half. LC made 38
of their 72 shots while Emory
and Henry made 22 of their
77 shots.
“I think a big reason we were
so successful is that in the first
two games we were able to
get a comfortable lead early.
It takes a lot out of you when
you play games that are grindit-out, neck and neck the whole
time. With a comfortable lead
we were able to play loose and
have a good time doing it,”
senior guard Daniel Rowe said.
Against Randolph in the
ODAC championship game the
Hornets got off to a fast start
taking an 11-2 lead. Randolph
slowly came back in the game
as LC took a 27-21 lead into
halftime. The score was close
throughout the remainder
of game. After back-to-back
three-pointers by Randolph,
the Hornets were trailing by
five with just over a minute left
in the game. Senior forward
Austen Arnold drove to the
hoop and was fouled while
making the shot which led to
a free throw to make the score
56-54. After a defensive stop
junior guard Zack Burnett
was fouled and sent to the free
throw line with four seconds
remaining in the game.
Burnett made both free throws
to tie the game at 56 and
force overtime.
“I was just trying my best
to have positive thoughts
only and stay as confident as
possible. I just kept telling
myself that there was no way
I was going to miss these
free throws and that we were
going to lose this game,”
Burnett said.
In overtime, Graves made a
jump shot in the paint to tie the
game at 58 followed by Burnett
making two free throws to give
LC the lead. Randolph missed
the potential game winning
shot at the buzzer to give the
LC Men’s basketball team their
first ODAC title since 1979.
“It almost can’t be put into
words what it means for our
team, our program and our
school. But overall I’d say that
this championship, for both
the men’s and the women’s
teams, lets everyone know
that Lynchburg is a serious,
big-time college basketball
program. For years our teams
have struggled, but this was
for our coaches and for the
players that came before us
who laid the foundation. We
just finished where they left
off,” Rowe said.
Burnett led the team with 13
points and was a part of the
ODAC All-Tournament Team
with Arnold and Graves, the
Most Outstanding Player.
Their record improved to 22-6
overall, a program record for
wins, and 12-4 in ODAC games.
LC Men’s basketball will play
the University of Scranton in
the first round of the NCAA
tournament as they travel to
Ohio Wesleyan University.
“We haven’t really thought
much about it yet, we’re still
just celebrating the ODAC
Championship
game,”
Burnett said about the NCAA
tournament. We are riding
a six-game win streak so we
feel pretty good about how
we’ve been playing and are
anxious to see if we can cause
some damage in the NCAA
tournament.”
LC Women’s basketball will
play Birmingham Southern
College in their first round
matchup as they travel to
Maryville College.
“Our mindset heading into
NCAAs is that we are not
finished yet. We still have
things we want to accomplish
and continue making history,”
Forbush said.
Wednesday, Mar. 2, 2016
Sports Schedule
Women’s Basketball
March 4 vs. Birmingham Southern at Maryville at 5:30 p.m.
Men’s Basketball
March 4 vs. Scranton at Ohio Wesleyan at 5:30 p.m.
Men’s Lacrosse
March 5 vs. Gettysburg at 1 p.m.
Women’s Lacrosse
March 5 at Washington College at 1 p.m.
Softball
March 2 at Averett at 1 p.m.
March 2 at Averett at 3p.m.
Baseball
March 5 at Bridgewater at 12 p.m.
March 5 at Bridgewater at 3 p.m.
Weekly Scores
Women’s Basketball
February 25 vs. Virginia Wesleyan W, 73-51
February 27 vs. Washington and Lee W, 71-57
February 28 vs. Guilford W, 62-55
Men’s Basketball
February 26 vs. Hampden-Sydney W, 90-67
February 27 vs. Emory and Henry W, 94-64
February 28 vs. Randolph W, 62-60
Men’s Lacrosse
February 27 vs. Cabrini L, 9-8
Women’s Lacrosse
February 27 vs. Marymount W, 11-8
Softball
February 27 vs. Christopher Newport L, 7-6
February 27 vs. Christopher Newport L, 11-0
Baseball
March 1 vs. Ferrum L, 8-1
Follow us on Social Media!
facebook.com/TheCritograph
@TheCritograph
THE CRITOGRAPH
IS HIRING!
For ALL positions for
the upcoming 2016-2017
academic year.
Positions Needed Include:
Editor-in-Chief
Copy Desk Chief
Sports Editor
Graphic Designer
Staff Writers
Staff Photographer
Web Editor
...And More!
For more information on
how to apply, send us an
email to: critograph@
lynchburg.edu.