THE LEAGUE OF REGRETTABLE SUPERHEROES

TITLE: The League of Regrettable Superheroes
AUTHOR: Jonathan Morris
BRIEF DESCRIPTION: TK
AUTHOR BIO: TK
EDITOR: Rick Chillot
PRICE: TK
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IMPRINT: Quirk Books
SPAN: Spring 2015
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TH E LE A G U E O F
RE G RE T T A BL E S U PE RH E RO E S :
H alf-Baked H eroes from the H istory of C omic s
by Jon Morris
For every Batman or Spiderman who hits the big time with a blockbuster movie, there are countless failures, also-­‐rans, and D-­‐listers. Some were shockingly ill-­‐conceived, some were hilariously off-­‐target, and some were just…weird. And now, finally, these long-­‐forgotten heroes will get their day in the sun. The League of Regrettable Superheroes presents one hundred of the strangest super-­‐characters to ever see print. QUIRKBOOKS.COM 1 Bee-­‐Man: Honey-­‐hungry baddie turned bee-­‐obsessed G-­‐man!
Created by: Otto Binder and Bill Draut Debuted in: Double-­‐Dare Adventures #1 (Harvey Thriller, December, 1966) Weapons and Gadgets: Antennae which emit a potent “sonic buzz”, drug-­‐
injecting stingers, honey-­‐vapor grenades. Headquarters: The Hive Primary Interests: Artisanal beers, mid-­‐century formalism, the films of Godard … oh, and bees. Quote: “My pollen grenade will put an end to your nonsense.” When Batman came to television screens in 1966, Bat-­‐Mania followed promptly thereafter, and pop culture went bananas for all sorts of super-­‐
powered avengers, no matter the flavor. Comics enjoyed a surge of renewed popularity and productivity, and the newly fertile earth produced literally dozens of over-­‐the-­‐top, campy characters as far as the eye could see. If there was a premise that could be beaten into the ground, comics were there to do it . Enter BEE-­‐MAN! Disgruntled mission control technician Barry E.Eames sabotages the scheduled landing of a remote-­‐
controlled robot rocketship, intending to rob the sample-­‐gathering space vessel of the wonders it collected beyond the surly bonds of Earth. Unfortunately, what Eames finds inside the vessel is MUTANT SPACE BEES who mercilessly savage him and lure his broken body to their advanced world. QUIRKBOOKS.COM 2 Decking himself out in advanced armor from the bee-­‐people’s impressive new Fall collection of comfortable casualwear for wannabe space thieves, Eames returns to Earth as the unstoppable, armored BEE-­‐MAN, stealing gold, radium and life-­‐giving honey from humanity and storing it in his secret, hidden, beehive-­‐the-­‐size-­‐of-­‐the-­‐astrodome which surely no one would ever be able to find, particularly if they were suffering from ‘Giant Hive Blindness’. Yes, Bee-­‐Men begins his career as a super-­‐crook, but by his second issue he’s turned his supersonic wings, honey grenades, and nose-­‐mounted stinger to the cause of justice! Shocked by the Bee People’s plans to enslave the minds of all humanity, Bee-­‐Man aligns himself with the forces of the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation, and is ultimately awarded special agent status in the one-­‐man F-­‐
Bee-­‐I! BUGGED! From Bee-Man onwards, the insect kingdom provides
inspiration for all sorts of bug-themed super-chums, such as:
The Red Bee, who fought villains during World War 2 with the aid of a trained
bee named “Michael” which he kept in his hollow belt buckle; Bumblebee;
Yellowjacket Jr.; Bee-29 The Bombadier (actually a bee); various versions
of Ant-Man (the original added Yellowjacket and Wasp identities to his
resume); and Ant (whose impossibly form-fitting exoskeleton seems to be
chief among her superpowers).
Superboy’s best girl Lana Lang was gifted with a magic ring, allowing her to
adopt the superheroic identity of Insect Queen, whose unsettling power
involved transforming portions of her body into replica insect parts.
There have been a wide variety of superheroes operating as The Blue
Beetle.
Representing arachnids, Spider-Man and Black Widow are the most wellknown. Atlas Comics’ horrific Tarantula transformed into a weird, green-furred
creature which he dealt out a peculiar punishment to the crooks: he’d eat
them! Quality Comics’ Spider Widow’s primary super-power was mental
control of black widow spiders.
Occupying the lowest possible rung on insect-themed superheroes: Maggott, a
one-time X-Man who hosted a pair of semi-sentient worm-like organisms in his
stomach. Gross.
QUIRKBOOKS.COM 3 A lso
f e a t u r i n g:
PREZ: the first teen president of the U.S. ! WEREWOLF: the only superhero spy in the world apparently! DRACULA: Gothic icon turned superhero! GUNMASTER: And Bullet the Gun Boy! QUIRKBOOKS.COM 4 SPYMAN! Also a superhero spy. QUIRKBOOKS.COM 5