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Plenum 2,1 (2105) pgs. 1-29 Copyright © Breanna Hudson. All rights reserved. “[I FEEL] SAFER IN MY IDENTITES”: PERCEPTIONS OF SEXUALIZED SPACE AND SAFETY IN SEATTLE Breanna Hudson Department of Geography University of Washington ABSTRACT: Matters of safety and vulnerability in the public sphere have dominated much of the discourse in both everyday queer media and scholarship in queer geography, as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) individuals continue to face often violent discrimination in public spaces. This project, while acknowledging the difficulty other researchers have discovered in conceptualizing queer space, addresses a gap within queer geography. Little research has been done to analyze the contradiction that lies in the conceptualization many individuals have of “queer spaces” as sites of safety and sites of increased vulnerability. Therefore, this research explores how sexualized spaces are identified, how safety is conceptualized for queer individuals in differentially sexualized spaces, and examines how these different conceptualizations interact to create contradictory spaces of safety and vulnerability. Personalized maps were used to deconstruct a static geography of sexualized space in Seattle. Qualitative interviews with LGBTQ-identified Seattle residents were coded and thematically analyzed for patterns of how subjective geographies of un/safe are constructed by queer individuals. This research highlights the importance of lived experiences in understanding how space is categorized and perceived, as well the need for ontological safety to play a larger role in the overall conceptualization of queer vulnerability. KEY WORDS: sexualized space; queer space; safety; Seattle Plenum 2,1 (2105) Introduction Queer geography is a growing discipline that has largely focused on queer spaces, that is, oft contested spaces where queer people exist “in opposition to” (Oswin, 2008: 89) heteronormative spaces. This tension is reflected in the focus research has often taken when examining queer people and space, especially public space. Three issues have taken precedence: harassment, protest, and the place of public affection or eroticism (Nusser and Anacker, 2012). For queer people, the notion of safety within queer spaces has been especially important, as the absence of safety in a hetero-normative and -supremacist society has largely been the catalyst for the creation and seeking of queer-oriented spaces. However, safety within such spaces has also proven to be a complicated matter as queer spaces have been found to be contradictory sites of both safety and danger. While this research has been important in understanding more about how queer people experience public space, especially spaces that are overtly queer such as “gayborhoods” or exist in aggressively anti-queer communities, the notion of a distinct boundary between spaces – be they public and private, queer and heteronormative has been challenged (Nusser and Anacker, 2012; Bell, 1995; Duncan, 1996; Hubbard, 2001; Bouhilette and Retter, 1997). However, while these boundaries may be dynamic and fluid, there is ample evidence to suggest that they heavily influence how the spaces are perceived for the individuals who inhabit them. Perceptions of safety are of particular interest because “actual” experiences of threat and danger, often captured in police statistics, only offer a limited view of how violence impacts queer individuals. Further, this data often only captures physical violence. The absence of other types of violence, such as ontological, fails to capture both accurate understandings of “actual” and perceived violence. This research project bridges the gap between the theorized ambiguous boundaries of space and the lived experiences of queer people within them by constructing a new “queer” geography of Seattle wherein the boundaries between queer/heteronormative and un/safe spaces are transient and overlapping. Furthermore, this research develops a deeper understanding of how “safety” is conceptualized and therefore experienced differently for queer individuals in queer- and heteronormativeidentified places. By doing so, I expand our knowledge of queer experiences in public space, especially as they relate to visibility and vulnerability, two often complementary components of navigating the predominately heteronormative public sphere. Nusser and Anacker (2012) believe that “studies of queer spaces alone do not help us understand how everyday space affects queer people” (pg. 175). I argue that they also limit our understanding of queer safety. By moving away from the binary and static definition of distinct and separate queer and heterosexual spaces and toward an understanding of public space as more subjectively experienced both as sexualized and safe, we are able to gain more insight into what “everyday space” is for queer people. Though this “everyday space” is ordinary, in other words, it is a space queer people inhabit as part of their daily life, this knowledge of the “everyday” for queer people is not, making it an important addition to queer geographic scholarship. Literature Review Queering Language; Queering Place 2 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” The language used to describe and talk about sexual minorities in many disciplines has become increasingly complicated as the discourse has shifted toward a more critical understanding of identity. Whereas “gay” had once been a common catchall phrase for all sexual minorities, terms such as LGBT and queer have come to replace it in a myriad of different ways. While LGBT, an acronym for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender, has been used as a more general but inclusive descriptor for non-heterosexual, as well as non-cisgender, individuals, queer as a descriptor has come to encompass more than just one’s sexual or gender identity (Nash, 2011; Nash, 2013; Oswin, 2008; Nusser and Anacker, 2012). Although queer can, and often does, function interchangeably with LGBT (Nusser and Anacker, 2012), it can also stand in “critical relation” (Oswin, 2008: 92) to it as its usage seeks to claim identities that transcend normative binaries such as heterosexual and homosexual, man and woman, and at times, even white and nonwhite (Oswin, 2008; Nash, 2013). Queer, then, seeks not only to challenge normativity as it is predominately framed by heteronormativity 1 (Browne, 2006), but also homonormativity, i.e. the normalization of white, middle class, assimilationist identities within LGBT culture (Nash, 2013; Bell and Binnie, 2004; Fox and Ore, 2010). Because of this complicated discourse, the definition of queer spaces is equally convoluted. While there have been efforts to understand and analyze queer space as separate from “gay” and “LGBT” spaces (Nash, 2013; Oswin, 2008), most research does not differentiate between them. Therefore, while queer space can and does exist both separate from and within other non-heteronormative sexualized spaces, it is most often theorized in a similar fashion, that is, spaces that are appropriated by individuals who fall under the broad “queer” umbrella. Space and place have historically been important parts of queer identity formation, but the origin of modern queer spaces, especially so-called queer villages or neighborhoods, is most often cited as a result of the Stonewall Riots in New York City in the late 1960s2 (Valentine and Skelton, 2003; Doderer, 2011). Since then, queer communities have increasingly become part of the Western urban landscape (Doderer, 2011; Oswin, 2008; Rushbrook, 2002; Skeggs, 1999). Queer space, though increasingly abstract in both definition and formation, is often synonymous with queer neighborhoods, i.e. spaces in which queerness is visible in the landscape both through the presence of queer bodies and queer-owned and frequented establishments (Oswin, 2008; Skeggs, 1999; Moran et al., 2001). This is usually achieved through a combination of noncommercial and commercial social space (Doderer, 2011; Nash, 2013), though some queer neighborhoods are also sites of residential concentration (Nusser and Anacker, 2012; Bouthillette, 1997). Therefore, modern gay spaces are frequently defined as sites of consumption (Bell and Binnie, 2004; Doderer, 2011; Nash, 2013; Rushbrook, 2002), especially for gay white men (Moran et al., 2001; Nusser and Anacker, 2012; Rushbrook, 2002; Skeggs, 2010). However, queer spaces can also be defined as temporary spaces queer bodies inhabit (Hubbard, 2001; Rushbrook, 2002; Moran et al., 2003) in ways that only covertly disrupt 1 Browne (2006) defines heteronormativity as “the normalisation of man/woman as opposites meant to come together within heterosexual relationships that are based on specific class and race-based relations” (pg. 886). 2 The Stonewall Riots were a social movement and backlash against a police raid of the Stonewall Inn specifically and police violence against LGBT communities, generally. 3 Plenum 2,1 (2105) the heteronormative landscape. Whether these spaces are relatively permanent or temporary, they act as sites of celebration and affirmation (Hubbard, 2001; Valentine and Skelton, 2003) where queerness is allowed (Corteen, 2002) and individuals are “safe” to express their sexualities (Nash, 2011, Corteen, 2002; Doan, 2007; Fox and Ore, 2010; Valentine and Skelton, 2003). “Safe” Space There is debate within scholarship about whether queer spaces are indeed safe spaces for queer people. Though many researchers cite safety as one of the benefits of queer spaces (Doan, 2007; Moran et al., 2001; Myslik, 1996; Nusser and Anacker, 2012), much of the rhetoric around safe spaces for queer people does not discuss queer spaces. Rather, the construction of “safe spaces” is often centered on the experiences of queer people in heterosexual spaces, especially within education, i.e. schools and classrooms (Weems, 2010; Stengel and Weems, 2010; Alvarez and Schneider, 2008; Fox and Ore, 2010). There is also an emphasis on youth, as they are not only the ones who are navigating the unsafe academic spaces of secondary school and universities, but also are denied access to many queer establishments because of their age or lack of monetary resources. Though these “safe spaces” are rooted in particular places, they are also “imaginary” (Stengel and Weems, 2010: 505) spaces that reflect the people that inhabit them more than the places they inhabit, though perceptions of that space can further influence feelings of safety (Weems, 2010). “Safe” spaces, in the way they are currently conceptualized, are inherently transient and dependent on the identities of the people who make up the spaces, making perceptions of safety increasingly complicated. For example, some researchers examine the way safe space functions for those who may be queer-identified but are not homonormative. For them, they are “safe” as queer people but not as people whose class backgrounds and racial identities differ from the norm (Fox and Ore, 2010). The literature highlights how both “safe spaces” and queer spaces blur the boundary between public and private, which further complicates the perception of safety in these spaces (Stotzer, 2010; Duncan, 1996; Hubbard, 2001; Moran et al., 2001; Bell, 1995). “Safe spaces” are contradictory places that inhabit the public and private spheres because they are within public places, yet need to create a boundary between what is public – and therefore heteronormative (Bell, 1995; Duncan, 1996) – and what is private and queered space. Queer spaces often attempt to accomplish the same thing, but as part of the urban landscape, the distinction between what is private and public becomes difficult to establish and regulate. Historically, queer people have been forced to experience their private lives in public as a result of oppressive societal norms (Bell, 1995; Hubbard, 2001). Shifting social attitudes toward queer people has allowed them a more visible public existence. However, the persistence of heterosexual as normal and therefore invisible within space has continued the equation of queer visibility as a private matter, something that has led to tension between queer visibility and heterosexual people in heteronormative spaces (Duncan, 1996; Valentine, 1996). There has also been tension between queer people and heterosexual visibility in queer spaces. Queer people often view “public” queer space as their private space and reject the “invasion” of heterosexual people within it (Corteen, 2002; Moran et al., 2001, 2003; Skeggs, 1999). There have been attempts to establish and regulate these perceived boundaries – private and public, queer and heterosexual – for both sides. In heterosexual spaces, the actions of queer people can be punished through physical and ontological violence 4 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” (Browne et al., 2011; Swim et al., 2007) and forceful exclusion (Valentine, 1996). In queer spaces, there is an attempt to regulate who can access said spaces through things such as bouncers at bars and proof of “membership” (Moran et al., 2003), but such actions are limited to privately owned places; other space, such as sidewalks within queer neighborhoods, are more public and therefore more difficult to regulate. Safety in Queer Spaces The shift in public opinion and therefore a shift from an underground to visible queer existence has, perhaps paradoxically, been shown as a major factor in queer vulnerability (Moran et al., 2003; Myslik, 1996; Skeggs, 1999; Stotzer, 2010). While the visibility of queer spaces has allowed them to become places of community (Rushbrook, 2002; Skeggs, 1999; Doan, 2007;) and identity formation (Valentine and Skelton, 2003; Doderer, 2011), it has also made them targets of heterosexist violence in two ways. In a more indirect manner, the formation of queer space has led to the strict policing of queer appearance as a determinant of “belonging” in such spaces (Moran et al., 2003; Valentine and Skelton, 2003). Such an appearance, determined by both queer and heterosexual ideas of queer people, has constructed a visible queer identity that allows queer people to fit in to queer spaces while simultaneously making them visible outside of it (Valentine, 1996; Swim et al., 2007). Studies have shown that being identified as queer by perpetrators of heterosexist violence is often the catalyst for this violence (Valentine, 1996; Corteen, 2002; Valentine and Skelton, 2003; Swim et al., 2007). In a more direct way, the concentration of queer people within queer spaces makes it easy for perpetrators to find their victims (Duncan, 1996; Moran et al., 2001, 2003; Valentine and Skelton, 2003; Stotzer, 2010). Despite these vulnerabilities related to queer-identified spaces, research has found that these spaces can be thought of as safe, even when they are public and highly visible (Moran et al., 2001, 2003; Browne and Lim, 2010; Corteen, 2002; Doan, 2007; Nash, 2011; Myslik, 1996). In this context, safety is defined in many different ways – it can be thought of as places where queer people are with people they feel are safe (Corteen, 2002), comfortable being themselves, i.e. queer and presenting as such (Corteen, 2002; Doan, 2007; Nash, 2011), expressing queer affection (Nusser and Anacker, 2012), or simply the absence of visibly straight people (Moran et al., 2003). In some cases, queer spaces were thought of as safe even when the subjects acknowledged the absence of things they identified with safety, whether physical or ontological. For example, in a study of white gay men in Washington, D.C., participants overwhelmingly found Dupont Circle, a queer-identified neighborhood, to be “safe [and] non-alienating” (Duncan, 1996: 8). This was despite the notable presence of property and violent crime, some of which was known to be anti-queer (Myslik, 1996). In the studies that examine the perceptions of safety in queer space in depth, there is diversity in how queer space is defined. For Moran et al. (2001; 2003), their studies of queer space examine both an identified “gay village” in Manchester, UK and a loose network of queer space in Lancaster, UK. In both studies, the threat of a heterosexual presence is what was identified as one of the key variables that made queer people feel unsafe in queer spaces. Even if the heterosexuals were identified as non-violent, their presence itself was a form of violence. There were also notable gender differences, as gay men were more likely than lesbians to find Manchester's gay village unsafe, especially those who had close contact and were familiar with the area. 5 Plenum 2,1 (2105) Both, however, overwhelmingly found Lancaster to be safe, despite it lacking a concentration of queer people. They also found that perceptions of danger were more influential than experiences of danger in Manchester, while experiences of violence played more heavily into perceptions of safety Lancaster. For the individuals in Myslik's (1996) study, which strictly defined queer space in Washington, D.C. as Dupont Circle and the rest of the city as heterosexual, their feelings of safety were defined by lack of signs of disorder, the presence of pro-gay sentiment and feelings of power and control within the neighborhood, even as they acknowledged their vulnerability within it. Nusser and Anacker's (2012) findings echo these sentiments, although their study does not draw the boundary between queer and heterosexual space as distinctly as others and emphasizes the role of other people in space, whether they are queer or heterosexual, as a a defining characteristic of that space. Shortcomings of current research Although these studies add crucial knowledge to our understanding of queer safety in queer spaces, there remain gaps in the knowledge that are important to fill. Understandings of queer and un/safe spaces have been explored in a number of complex ways, but rarely have these understandings been deconstructed through rich qualitative data. Further, none of the studies have examined queer and non-queer spaces side-by-side to complicate the current understanding of what “safe” means in queer spaces, and indeed, even what “queer” means in queer spaces. Only Msylik (1996) tries to get an in-depth understanding of how queer spaces can be perceived simultaneously as both spaces of safety and danger. However, previous research also cautions the clear and pre-determined distinction made between heterosexual and queer space as Myslik had, and although Nusser and Anacker (2012) do not make this distinction, their study takes place in a city where a queer neighborhood doesn't exist, making the lack of distinction between sexualized spaces a necessity. The absence of a more fluid understanding of spatial boundaries creates a further need to deconstruct both queer space and queer safety, as our daily geographies blur the boundaries between space and therefore our perception of safety in ways that have not been researched previously. Other methodological limitations remain necessary to address in current research. None of the studies previously discussed were racially diverse – the participants in Nusser and Anacker's study were 4/5th white, Msylik's population was entirely white men, and neither of Moran et al.'s studies mentioned race at all. In the spirit of queer studies, wherein queer means not only in opposition to heteronormative but also in opposition to the homonormative narrative that is prevalent in much research, there remains a need to understand safety through the experiences of nonwhite queer individuals. As previous research has found (see Fox and Ore, 2010; Logie and Rwigema, 2014), non-white queer individuals experience queer spaces in ways that white queer people do not, as they not only have to interact with homophobia and heterosexism but also racism from those both outside and within these spaces. Given that people of color make up approximately 37 percent of the American population (U.S. Census Bureau, 2013), the absence of their voices in queer research represents a crucial gap in knowledge. Further, a recent poll by Gallop found people of color were more likely to identify as LGBT than white people (Gates and Newport, 2012). Therefore, not only are 6 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” overwhelmingly white queer samples limiting, they are also an inaccurate representation of the queer community in the United States. Additionally, none of the studies were set in an American city like Seattle, which embodies Richard Florida's “creative city” concept as a place that is youthful, politically liberal and highly tolerant of diversity. Seattle is also unlike places such as Kansas City, Missouri and Washington, D.C. because, despite lagging behind San Francisco in the percentage of population that identifies as LGBT – 13% versus 15% (Turnbull, 2006) – it recently overtook San Francisco as the city with the largest concentration of gay-couple households (Balk, 2013). Such a political and social atmosphere, particularly as an atmosphere that is implicitly thought of as safe for queer people, is missing in the research on perceptions of safety in public spaces by queer people. This study therefore seeks to create new constructions of sexualized and un/safe space within queer theory/geography. In particular, I examine the contradictions in perceptions of safety through a more fluid construction of sexualized geographies. Additionally, I seek to use “queer” as both a critical lens from which to understand subjective geographies and a synonym for the identities that play a strong role in shaping them. By bridging these definitions, I seek to bridge the personal with the theoretical and shed new light on “everyday space” for queer people. To do this, I ask three questions: How is sexualized space identified by queer individuals? How is safety conceptualized for them in spaces identified as queer or heterosexual? How do these interact to create “safe” places of increased vulnerability? Methods Participants The participants of this study are queer (i.e. non-heterosexual and/or cisgender3) identified people between the ages of 18 and 30 who live in the city of Seattle. Though the experience of older and younger queer individuals are worthwhile, I chose this age group based on the assumption that they use “queer” space in a way that is different for those younger or much older than they are. They were chosen using non-probability sampling, which was initially judgment sampling through communication with queer organizations and networks throughout Seattle before snowball sampling was used. Snowball sampling allowed me to access parts of the population that were not connected to any formal queer networks, and allowed me to gain trust with the participants as well. It was also helpful in making sure the participants were as racially and ethnically heterogeneous as possible as I made it clear that I was primarily seeking participants of color. Seven participants between the ages of 20 and 24 were interviewed, two of whom were white and five who were people of color (including 2 of Latin descent, 2 East Asian, and 1 Black). Of this population, three identified as women, three as men, and one as genderfluid4; two identified as lesbians, two as gay men, one as pansexual5, 3 Cisgender is a gender identity in which one's identity matches the behavior or role society deems appropriate for the sex they were assigned at birth (“Definition of Terms”). 4 Genderfluid is a gender identity in which one's identity is fluctuating and moves between genders (“Definition of Terms”) 5 Pansexual, also known as omnisexual, is a sexual orientation defined by attraction to those of all gender identities (ibid). 7 Plenum 2,1 (2105) one as queer and one as demisexual 6 ; further, two identified themselves on trans spectrum. Measures Data was collected in three ways: first, participants filled out a brief demographic form listing their age and how they identify themselves with regards to race, class, gender identity, sexual orientation and neighborhood of residence. All of these questions were open-ended so participants did not feel limited in how they were allowed to identify. Then the participants were sent a link to a blank map of Seattle and asked to map out the places they identify as heterosexual and queer within the city using the Google Maps Engine interface. Google Maps Engine, now called Google My Maps, is a free, online mapping interface which allows users to create custom, multi-layered maps using the Google Maps interface. Using the online software, participants could draw polygons around the locations they had identified with relative precision. They could also add notes to the map if they wished to do so. Following the mapping exercise, there was a loosely structured interview in which participants were asked how they perceive safety in public spaces (e.g. “Do you think there's an expectation of safety in a public space?”) and if this was different for places they had identified as queer versus places they had identified as heteronormative. Because the interviews were loosely structured, participants were encouraged to take the conversation where they felt comfortable to possibly draw out previously unknown or unexamined variables and aspects of safety not yet identified within the research. The interviews lasted from 30 to 75 minutes, and were audio recorded pending participant consent. The interviews were transcribed verbatim and then coded, first through open coding and then followed by axial coding to define the themes found during the original round of coding. Participants were assigned pseudonyms during this process. Because the map data was created on Google Maps engine, some manipulation was needed to produce data that could be displayed on one map. The different layers – queer, safe and unsafe – were downloaded from the original maps as KML files. Then using Esri ArcGIS and the spatial analysis toolbox, the KML files were converted into layer files that could be displayed on the same map. None of the map data used was provided from other sources; however, some of the polygons that extended beyond the boundaries of the city of Seattle were clipped, as data outside of the city limits was either the result of spatial inaccuracy or irrelevant to the study (some participants, for instance, drew polygons for places in the nearby suburbs). Limitations Because my sampling methods relied on formal and informal networks to contact and connect with people, it is possible that those who were less connected with the queer community were not part of my participant pool. Another possible limitation is that snowball sampling created a participant pool that was heterogeneous in some ways, such as race, but homogeneous in regards to other identities such as 6 Demisexual is a sexual orientation defined by sexual attraction only to those one first has a strong emotional connection with (“What is Demisexuality?”). 8 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” class, as most of the participants identified as middle class. Likely related to this, all but one of the participants were either college students or college graduates. While I do believe that the lack of educational and class diversity in my participant pool has affected my results, the diversity otherwise prevalent has added depth and value to my data. Another important limitation to note is the limited geography of the participants. Because most participants were not from the city of Seattle and lived in the University District, their “view” of Seattle was very university-centric. Many of the examples given by the participants of their everyday spaces were in and around the University of Washington campus. The other areas that participants were familiar with were largely popular neighborhoods that function as destination neighborhoods for the city, e.g. downtown, Capitol Hill, Ballard, etc. Therefore, while there was a richness of information about these neighborhoods, there was a distinct lack of information about neighborhoods in other parts of the city, namely those that were extremely north or south. Though these areas are largely residential in nature and perhaps do not offer the same sort of commercial resources available in the neighborhoods more familiar to the participants, the inclusion of them would have offered a richer, more complex view of the city of Seattle as a whole. Finally, I would like to acknowledge how my own positionality has influenced my analysis of the data. As a resident of Seattle and the University District my own preconceived ideas about Seattle have created a less visible, though no less meaningful, subjective geography. So too have my experiences navigating public space as a queer black woman in a city that, as many participants have noted, can be defined in a plurality of ways by white masculinity. I have done my best to understand the experiences of others, particularly those who are not necessarily cognizant of their own vulnerability, and to reflect what they have shared with me in a form most true to their lived experiences. “Queer” Seattle Seattle, the largest city in the state of Washington, is particularly unique compared to the county, state and nation in its household makeup. While families make up more than half of all households in the city, only approximately nineteen percent of all households have children under eighteen, the second lowest percentage for large cities in America7 (Turnbull, 2010). Forty-one percent of all households are comprised of only one person (“About Seattle”). Of major cities in the United States, Seattle is also one of the whitest, with a population that is approximately 70% white (Cima, 2013). And as previously acknowledged, 2.6% or one in every seventeen Seattle couple households were same-sex couples. While a small percentage, and only .1% higher than San Francisco, it is a stark comparison to cities such as Colorado Springs, Colorado and Fort Worth, Texas, where less than .3% of couple households were identified as same sex (Balk, 2013). Seattle also has a queer presence that reaches beyond the individual household. As Knopp and Brown (2003) have observed, “Gay and lesbian and queer community and cultural life are particularly well-developed in Seattle” (pg. 414). In fact, they go so far as to say that Seattle's queer cultural life is similar to that of San 7 For comparison, San Francisco, the city with the lowest percentage, had eighteen percent versus thirty percent in the nation as a whole (Turnbull, 2010). 9 Plenum 2,1 (2105) Francisco, a city that is well-known and perhaps defining of what queer cultural life is in the United States. For Brown and Knopp, the existence of Capitol Hill, a “vibrant queer commercial core area” (pg. 415) not unlike San Francisco's Castro district and the abundance of queer organizations, networks and institutions makes Seattle “arguably one of the 'queerest' cities in North America” (pg. 415). It is also a very visible one. For instance, Seattle's PrideFest, an annual parade and festival celebrating the queer community that takes place in the downtown core, is one of the largest in the country with upwards of 120,000 attendees in 2013 (“Latest News”). Although Seattle has a vibrant and visible queer community, this has not always translated into being a safe place for queer people. In fact, according to at least one report, the “LGBT community has experienced the largest amount of hate crimes” of any vulnerable group in Seattle (“Hate Crimes...”). Hate crimes against queer people have been documented and reported as recently as April 2014 (Herz, 2014), with incidents in 2014 alone ranging from violence against individuals and at least one arson at a gay nightclub (Thompson and Broom, 2014). Though anti-queer hate crimes have occurred in the city, they have been found to be especially prevalent in Capitol Hill and open public spaces such as Volunteer Park 8 (Boog et al., 2011). The increased vulnerability felt by Seattle's queer community in Capitol Hill can be seen in both their awareness and their efforts to protect themselves through the creation of Q-Patrol, now called OutWatch, a citizen patrol group “aimed at preventing gay-bashings and violence in Seattle’s gay neighborhoods” (Cohen, 2014). While official police hate crime statistics can offer some insight into the experiences of safety for queer individuals, they are ultimately limited in their capacity. A survey by the Seattle Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered (sic) Commission found that although 58 percent of respondents had experienced anti-queer discrimination or harassment within seven years, 89 percent of those did not report the harassment or discrimination to the police (Boog et al., 2011). This can partially be explained by the tension between the police and queer populations who have faced homophobia and transphobia when reporting incidents to the police. Therefore, while police statistics offer grounded knowledge, this knowledge cannot be said to accurately reflect the vulnerability of queer individuals in Seattle. Violence and vulnerability also cannot solely be reflected in concrete experiences of anti-queer discrimination or harassment. Perceptions of safety are not only rooted in the experiences of the individuals but of the community; for many, the absence of experiences of anti-queer violence does not negate feelings of vulnerability, as they hold an awareness that they are vulnerable not as an individual but as a member of the queer community. According to Young (1990), it is through this group membership, rather than individual experiences of violence, that violence can often be defined for oppressed groups. It is with this in mind that I move toward a more critical understanding of the geography of Seattle, as a subjectively experienced and often contradictorily defined place of safety, vulnerability, queerness and heteronormativity. By looking at the data from the personalized mapping exercises, I first lay out a spatial understanding of where such places exist in Seattle for participant and delve deeper into the idea of Seattle as both a queer and safe city. Then I deconstruct how participants have come to know spaces as queer, heteronormative and the possibility of neither. Following this, the paper turns to an analysis of how safety is differentially conceptualized, and the 8 10 Volunteer Park is located in the Capitol Hill neighborhood. Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” ways in which identity – of space, others and the self – influence perceptions of sexualized space, safety and belonging, and the implications of such for queer individuals in sexualized spaces. A New Geography: Sense-of-Place Mapping “[Seattle is] more queer than a lot of other cities” (Julia, participant #7). “Queer Seattle”, though ideologically unbound by spatial borders, was identified as having very little geographic range by participants (see figure 1). The primary place identified by multiple participants was Capitol Hill, a central Seattle neighborhood closely linked to the local queer community through the existence of queer establishments such as bars and community centers. However, even the “queer” space of Capitol Hill was contestable, as there were only a few sites of overlap where multiple participants thought queer space was within the designated boundaries of the neighborhood9. And while some participants saw a large part of Capitol Hill as queer, others saw queer space as limited within the neighborhood, identifying only the area near the Pike/Pine corridor, a heavily commercialized area, or even just Broadway, a largely commercial arterial street that runs through the neighborhood. The other queer areas of the city that were identified were not related to specific neighborhood identities but rather personal experiences that held strong emotional connections for the participants. Some places, such as those in South Seattle along Rainer Avenue and Ravenna Park in North Seattle were identified by a participant as associated with the particular spatiality of a queer relationship they had had rather than a wider queer community. Other places, notably in the University District, a neighborhood in Northeast Seattle around the University of Washington campus, were associated with campus resources such as the Q Center, a queer resource center located in the Husky Union Building, and the Ethnic Cultural Center, a resource and community center for students of color on campus. Notable absences in this subjective geography of “queer” Seattle as defined by participants were neighborhoods such as downtown Seattle, Ballard and Fremont, as they are associated with youth and cultural tolerance much in the same way that the University of Washington campus is, given their relatively young populations and active commercial districts (White, 2008). Other absences include West Seattle and much of South Seattle. While these absences, as noted previously, may reflect a lack of familiarity with these areas on the part of the participants, it is also worth recognizing that both West and South Seattle are largely residential and therefore may not have the resources nor the commercial draw that is typically associated with identified queer spaces. “I would say for the most part like a lot of Seattle is very safe [...] in general Seattle seems like a very safe city to me” (Adam, participant #4). 9 It is perhaps worth noting that the boundaries of Capitol Hill as defined by the city of Seattle were not available to the participants as they created their personalized maps. Therefore, the relative precision of “queer” spaces being defined within said boundary reflects a cultural understanding of the boundaries of Capitol Hill rather than the predetermined designation of them. 11 Plenum 2,1 (2105) “Safe” Seattle was more wide-ranging than queer spaces, but it too had a specific geography (see figure 2). Again absent were West and South Seattle; however, much of Central Seattle, including downtown Seattle and the Central District, was identified by at least one participant as being a space safe. Multiple participants also identified Capitol Hill; however, other participants did not identify it, and the range of “safe” was more spatially limited than the “queer” space previously noted in the neighborhood. However, “safe” and “queer” spaces though distinctly different in their geographies were generally overlapping, reflecting a connection held for individual participants and participants as a whole between queer and safe spaces. The University District remained a meaningful place for participants, a finding not surprising given that most also resided in the neighborhood. However, unlike Capitol Hill, the scale at which people thought of the University District as “safe” was large relative to the scale at which people thought of the neighborhood as “queer”. Instead of solely identifying campus resources, participants generally saw the entirety of campus, along with the residential and commercial areas west and north of it, as safe, including much of the neighboring Ravenna neighborhood. The other “safe” places identified also varied from queer spaces in that they were not seemingly connected to any personal experiences outside of a general familiarity with the city. Outside of Central Seattle and the University District, the other “safe” spaces were natural spaces, specifically the Burke-Gilman trail, a mixed-use recreational trail that runs along the waterfront in North Seattle, and Discovery Park, a large park in the Magnolia neighborhood. Curiously, this geography can be seen as dissonant with the way participants spoke of safety in Seattle in generalized terms. For most participants, there was at least a baseline expectation that Seattle was a safe city, especially when it came to physical harm. As one participant put it, “[There is] a certain sense of safety, at least, an expectation that you know it's not going to be okay to assault anyone” (Julia, participant #7). Others articulated it in a more complex way – “There's an expectation of physical safety in an extreme […] to the point where we alter our geographies and spaces [by] adding light, adding police […] there's a need for visual feelings of physical safety (Kevin, participant #5). It remains that this perception of overall safety is not reflected in their subjective geographies. “There's definitely [...] flaws in like how safe it is” (Adam, participant #4). Geographies of safety were further complicated by the way participants both mapped and thought of “unsafe” spaces. Unsafe spaces were found to be the most contestable, both in terms of where individual people identified them, as there was only one site of overlap between the perceptions of unsafe spaces, and in the overlap between previously identified categories and spaces (see figure 3). For instance, parts of central Seattle and the University District that were identified as safe by some were identified as unsafe by others. And although West Seattle was still left without any identified spaces, one participant designated a large swath of South Seattle as an unsafe space. Like queer spaces, unsafe space tended to be smaller and more specific, though not always. Other place identified as unsafe included part of Belltown, a neighborhood just north of downtown Seattle, as well as Capitol Hill along the Pike/Pine corridor and a swath of North Seattle that includes much of Wallingford, Fremont and Ballard. Also 12 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” included were the previously mentioned overlaps: part of the Central District, and areas in the University District, namely Greek Row, a residential area just north of campus populated by fraternity and sorority houses, and the Intramural Activities Building (IMA), the university athletic center. Participants were perhaps the most open about how they identified unsafe spaces, even in the absence of their subjective mapping. Though they spoke about generalized safety in terms of physical violence, for many, “unsafe” was complicated by differential ideas of safety, race and gender. For instance, for many participants, Greek Row was a site of vulnerability because of their beliefs about who lived there, namely young white men often under the influence of alcohol. For others, Greek Row, as well as neighborhoods like Fremont and Ballard, was a reflection of rigid heteronormative social norms that did not allow them room to express their identities as queer people. In other areas, however, being “unsafe” reflected beliefs of high crime rates – not necessarily in the form of anti-queer violence, as one might expect, but generalized violent and forceful crimes, e.g. assault and burglaries. In the coming sections, I will delve deeper into how these geographies of safety are often related to geographies of sexualized space. However, before doing so, it is necessary to understand how individuals construct geographies of sexualized spaces, both queer and heteronormative. “Knowing” Sexualized Spaces The presence of Capitol Hill as a neighborhood with a LGBTQ identity may suggest the importance of the built environment in the identification of queer spaces. However, while the built environment does play a role, for participants, it was more of a passive actor against which social relations were acted. The main identifier for queer spaces both in and out of Capitol Hill was the people who inhabited it, reflecting the temporary nature many participants noted. As one participant succinctly said, “Queer spaces are defined by who's there” (Jordan, participant #6). Others echoed the sentiment almost exactly: “Where there are a lot of queer people” (Julia, participant #7), “Where there is a concentration of queer folk” (Kevin, participant #5), and “[the] amount of queer people using a space probably is like the number one way I identify a space as being queer” (Adam, participant #4). This presence of queer people was further complicated by what it meant to be identified as queer. While there was a reluctance to define visible queerness10(“It's hard to identify a queer person, I don't really have one image of them” (Michelle, participant #2), it was clear that participants could construct what a queer body would look like. Whether vague like a “generally non-normative presentation” (Leah, participant #3) and “certain styles of clothing and certain haircuts” (Jordan, participant #6) or specific like “the undercut […] the jacket with like the studs” (Michelle, participant #2) and “blue or pink hair […] piercings and tattoos” (Mark, participant #1), there was general consensus about how people could present themselves to be read as queer. It was not only queer bodies, however, but also queer actions that helped people identify queer people and therefore queer spaces. Some noted a certain consciousness about the queer experience as an identifier. One participant remarked, for example, “If people ask you pronouns […] that makes it seem more like a queer 10 “It's hard to identify a queer person, I don't really have one image of them” (Michelle, participant #2). 13 Plenum 2,1 (2105) population” (Jordan, participant #6). More so, however, visible queer relationships and desires, e.g. a woman mentioning her girlfriend, two men kissing, an individual expressing same-sex attraction, tended to define queer actions that enabled participants to identify queer spaces. These expressions of queer affection, while defining queer space for some, also demonstrate how there must be a cultural “knowing” or understanding of queer spaces beyond the individual. Queer space cannot be known only through the bodies and actions of others; it must also be known before these bodies and actions can inhabit it. As Bouthillette (2007) put it, there is a “reproduction of gay spaces…the ways in which the gay identity of the neighborhoods is maintained and recognized by [the population]” (pg. 223). For participants, this recognition centered around the reputation of a place as queer-oriented or queer-owned, or around the reputation of the event taking place as of queer interest, e.g. a slam poetry event11. This is not to say that the built environment did not play a role in identifying queer spaces, especially those that had some degree of permanence such as a community center or a club. The built environment was especially important in the advertisement of queer spaces in the absence of people through “stickers about anarchy or safe safes” (Mark, participant #1), “the rainbow or the bear flag, or leather” (Michelle, participant #2), “posters” (Leah, participant #3) or simply “if they have [queer] in the title of the space” (Julia, participant #7). It also often defined the boundary between what participants considered between “private” and “public” space, allowing a distinction of queer-identified spaces from other sexualized spaces that were part of the otherwise same landscape. While obvious at times, such as the rainbow flag and its widespread cultural understanding as a symbol of gay pride (Heinz, et al., 2002), even the built environment could be complicated by a more intimate knowledge. One participant made a particularly astute observation about identifying gay bars, showing how a queer aesthetic transcends the body: “there's this general feminized symbolism that's used in a lot of queer or gay male bars […] all the signage and commercial materials use colors and fonts that would reflect a very [camp] portrayal of a gay male” (Kevin, participant #5). But these features of the built environment were not so much about the built environment itself as they were about offering a backdrop against which “queer” could be performed through the intentional placement of identifiers. The passivity of the built environment could be understood another way: queer space as an appropriation of heteronormative space. As one participant said, “A space has to be explicitly queer to be designated queer whereas the norm is to assume that's a hetero [sic] space” (Mark, participant #1). Though, as Binnie (1997) has noted, “space is not naturally authentically 'straight' but rather actively produced and (hetero)sexualized” (pg. 223). This production of heteronormativity is constant and normalized in American society. Therefore it is against heteronormative space that queer spaces come to exist. However, even if the heteronormatization of space is ubiquitous, the identification of heteronormative space was as dynamic as queer spaces, if not more so, reflecting the societal tension between heterosexual as both the natural norm and a performed and produced identity. This dynamism also brings attention to the fact that heterosexual spaces are at times both sexualized and desexualized (Hubbard, 2000). 11 14 There is an active slam poetry community in Seattle that has a strong queer presence. Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” For most participants in this study, heteronormative was understood to be the default of any space until proven otherwise. Unlike queer spaces, which heavily rely on the presence of queer people and actions for definition, heteronormative spaces were defined largely in the absence of heterosexual people. That is, heteronormative was framed as a social norm and understanding of what was acceptable behavior within that framework. This acceptable behavior was articulated as heterosexual behavior, i.e. the fact that heterosexual behavior was allowed, rather than unacceptable queer behavior, and could be seen as a more passive production of heteronormativity. However, participants were also cognizant of the fact that heteronormativity could be more actively produced in a space, and this production took a more embodied form. For example, one participant made a distinction between heteronormative spaces and “places that are strictly targeted toward heterosexual encounters” (Michelle, participant #2). Actively heteronormative spaces were not only about the acceptability of heterosexuality but the expectation of it placed on the queer body. This heteronormativity was not limited to a heterosexual sexual orientation but also to a normative gender presentation and, at times, the normalization of anti-queer sentiments and aggression. Places that were thought to be actively produced as heteronormative included gyms, heterosexual bars, Greek Row and gaming communities, given how gender normativity was thought to be an important feature of fitting into them. Active heteronormativity was also tied to rigid masculinity but not femininity, reflecting the relative inflexibility of the masculine social identity. Furthermore, though participants did not often speak of racial identifiers12, their choices – particularly when it came to Greek Row and gaming communities – reflected racialized masculinities as whiteness dominates both those spaces and our collective imagination about them. Defining Safety While physical safety was a concern for some participants when talking about public safety generally, participants rarely if at all mentioned it when speaking of what safety mean to them in relation to sexualized spaces13. Instead, discussions of safety centered almost entirely ontological safety, or “the certainty of belonging to, being part of, and being accepted by a determined group” (Altamirano, 2008: 23) or in a certain space, broadly defined as comfort and captured by three categories: sense of self and belonging, social identity and visibility, and societal rules and expectations. And though these categories were overarching in all spaces, they were also conceptualized differently depending on the type of sexualized space participants identified. Participants expressed feeling safe in queer spaces for a number of reasons. One of the primary reasons was that they felt comfortable and affirmed as a queer person in them. While this was at times expressed as simply as “knowing” there were 12 It could be argued that the absence of racial markers is in fact a reflection of one, as whiteness is the default and rarely named as a racialized identity. 13 This absence may at least partially be explained by Seattle's reputation as a relatively safe city. Although it does see its fair share of violent crime, it is low compared to other major US cities. In 2012, the metropolitan area was ranked “third most peaceful city in America” (“Seattle Ranked...”), falling behind the Cambridge, MA and New Brunswick, NJ metropolitan areas. 15 Plenum 2,1 (2105) other queer people around, a lot of this affirmation came in the form of not feeling like an “other” as a queer individual. As one participant put it: “I feel like particularly comfortable [in Capitol Hill] […] It feels like you're surrounded by people who just like kind of get it. I mean, it's not like I don't love all my straight friends and stuff but it just feels like a little bit more like, I don't know, 'Oh, this must be what it's like for the majority of the population to be gay' because it's not something we always think about consciously but it's always something that it's in the back of our minds” (Adam, participant #4). Other participants framed it similarly, noting that they felt comfortable because they did “not fear[] judgment or ostracization because of not belonging to a certain normal” (Kevin, participant #5). Because of this, they felt like they were able to be open and “authentic” in their identities. As one participant said, “I can actually talk about myself in queer spaces” (Mark, participant #1). This was particularly important because this authenticity was something they felt like they were denied in heteronormative spaces, either because of social norms or because of fear of being visible as a queer person. Being visible in a queer space, though, was something participants desired to the point of being frustrated when it did not happen. This visibility was thought of in terms of both being recognized as a queer person and being represented as one, i.e. feeling like their particular sexual orientation or gender identity was validated and valued in the space. Participants also noted that being able to have this variety of identities and relative freedom of expression with their sexuality and gender that was not necessarily available in heteronormative spaces was comfortable and “safe” to them. Much of the opposite was said to be true about what it meant to be safe in heteronormative spaces. Unlike in queer spaces, there was no expectation of belonging as a queer person these spaces. This did not always make the spaces feel unsafe. Rather, safe took one a more complex means for different individuals. For some, “straight spaces aren't safe […] they're just spaces that you're in” (Michelle, participant #2). For others, while they felt “safer in my identities as a queer and trans person” in queer spaces, they did not feel unsafe in heteronormative ones. Complicating safety further, one participant said of their experiences: “I always feel safe in heteronormative spaces because I'm assertive and I'm not willing to let anybody compromise that” (Jordan, participant #6). However “passing”14 was a common theme in participants' responses. Contrary to how they felt in queer spaces, not being visible as a queer person was a lot of what made being in heteronormative spaces safe. It was only if they were “found out” as queer individuals that their safety was compromised. There were limits to how much they could “pass” and remain comfortable, however. For participants, it was one thing to realize a heteronormative identity was being placed on them and another for them to have to actively perform that heterosexual identity. Though not comfortable enough to consciously hide their queerness, as one participant made note of, performing heterosexuality was a violation of the “authentic” self whose presence, for many, came to define comfort in queer spaces. Safety was also different in heteronormative spaces in that it was not passive or given to the individuals. As the quote from participant number six shows - “I'm assertive and I'm not willing to let anybody compromise that.” Although 14 Passing in this context means being able to be read as heterosexual and/or cisgender; not being read as queer in heteronormative spaces. 16 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” heteronormative spaces were characterized as safe, participants may not have always expressed action in creating that safety akin to the way participant number six had. Hiding queerness was another way participants created a sense of safety for themselves in heteronormative spaces. However, in creating safety by consciously hiding their queer identities, participants were giving their “authentic” selves up, rather than gaining the comfort of authentic expression normally afforded them in queer spaces. Defining Threat When speaking of safety, it is further necessary to turn our gaze to what is unsafe, that is, what makes a place dangerous and who is in danger, as it orients us toward participants' perceptions of vulnerability. Like safety, danger was also a fluid concept. Instead of being defined by the space – though at times it was – danger was generally defined by the identity of the person perpetrating the act. For participants, there was a great deal of overlap that complicated what it meant for queer to be safe in ways that heteronormative was not. However, unlike safety, threat took a more embodied form, transcending boundaries between what was queer and what was heteronormative. Participants' perceptions of what was threatening can be best summed up in this quote: “There's physical danger. I've never experienced that, but I know it's a possibility, um, but I think more than that it's just like danger of being judged, of like not being accepted, of people saying things that are like dehumanizing or just awful” (Julia, participant #7). As mentioned, this idea of danger was not restricted to either heteronormative or queer spaces or heterosexual or queer people. In some ways, they could all embody a type of “danger” at certain times, in certain places, given certain bodies. For instance, participants were likely to posit whiteness as threatening in any environment, echoing experiences of queer people of color found in other studies (Logie and Rwigema, 2014). But this whiteness was also gendered, as white masculinity proved more concerning than white femininity. When mentioned, white femininity at worst presented a discomfort, while white masculinity, on the other hand, was connected to more overtly violent disturbances, e.g. aggressiveness and drunkenness. And while this was thought of as threatening to queer populations in general, it was also acknowledged that there were particular queer bodies that were more vulnerable to being harmed, such as women, people of color and people on the trans spectrum, given their marginalized positions in both mainstream society and queer communities. Additionally, given that safety was associated with flexible social norms, the presence of rigid social norms, particularly those that led to individuals being read as not belonging in a particular space or with certain populations, was associated with danger. When participants did speak of heterosexual threat specifically, it was just as likely to be disembodied as it was connected to individuals' actions. There was an absence of an explicitly homophobic figure or even intentionally homophobic acts. For some participants there was even an absence of the possibility of such a figure, because for them, for something to be threatening meant that the threat had to be unexpected. As one participant put it, “There's no person who can disrupt your feelings of safety or comfort [in heteronormative spaces] because they don't exist” (Michelle, participant #2). In other words, because heteronormative spaces were not perceived as not safe, at least from this participant's perspective, they could not become unsafe. For others, the safety of heteronormative spaces was more nuanced, 17 Plenum 2,1 (2105) as they believed “heteronormative spaces obviously can be a threat depending on like how heteronormative [they are]” (Jordan, participant #6), echoing the distinction made between spaces that were passively or actively heteronormative. Still, whenever participants spoke of heterosexual people in heteronormative spaces, there was a habit of removing their own body from being threatened or vulnerable. For instance, when they spoke of anti-queer language, it was either mentioned as slang, i.e. part of a normalized but unintentionally homophobic vocabulary, or against an unknown other, rather than personal harassment. This largely related to participants understanding of their ability to “pass” in heteronormative spaces and the veneer of safety it allowed. It was only when heterosexual people were in queer spaces that participants expressed any particular negative relations, but these were expressed mildly as discomfort or annoyance – “When I'm in a queer space [and] I see someone I read as straight, I feel very annoyed by it” (Michelle, participant #2). In contrast to the positioning of white masculinity as a dominant threat, these straight people were often explicitly described as female. The presence of straight men in queer spaces was either not spoken of or written off. One participant believed straight men would not be in queer spaces, because to do so would make them feel anxiety about their masculinity. Another thought that queer spaces were “very off-putting for a lot of straight [people]” (Adam, participant #4), not because of any homophobic intentions but rather their unfamiliarity with queer culture. Queerness was not immune from being threatening, but it was tied up in a more complex relational understanding of power and identity. People were not vulnerable as queer, as they primarily identified in relation to heteronormativity. Rather, they were vulnerable as multiply marginalized queer people. As one participant explained, “One of my trans friends was saying that she was in the Q Center and she heard a bunch of lesbians talking about how they hate penis, which is horrible for her like as a trans woman who dates women to hear that, um, in a space that [is] supposedly safe for her […] Transmisogyny is a thing so like in that sense it's not really any different from non-queer spaces. You can still be racist, you can still be sexist” (Julia, participant #7). Even though this echoed sentiments about race and gender that were prevalent in heteronormative spaces, they were threatening not because they were expected but because participants expected differently. Take, for instance, the assertion that “anybody who like tries to police what it means to be queer is weird and annoying […] those people can be less safe I feel” (Jordan, participant #6). This policing of identity is seen as the norm in heteronormative spaces, but it goes against the expectations of how open and accepting participants imagined queer spaces. As another participant put it, “I think queer spaces have almost a responsibility to be more accepting of people within our community [...] and I think that when those spaces don't do that I think that it's like we're really like dropping the ball and like we're like negating our responsibility […] That makes those spaces dangerous for queer people who are looking for a sense of comfort and like they come to these space and don't get that” (Adam, participant #4) But perhaps what established queerness apart from heteronormativity the most was the intimacy with which participants acknowledged threat. Though there were those who said there was nothing that was unsafe for them in queer spaces, they still had an understanding of what was threatening in them and how they could embody 18 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” that threat. For example, one participant observed, “I think I'm more likely to be dangerous than in danger in queer spaces” (Mark, participant #1). Much like this participant, others remained sensitive about their presence and actions in queer spaces in a way they were not in heteronormative spaces. This sensitivity occurred, for two participants, by acknowledging the potential threat of their gender identities, remarking, ”I know that like my masculinity can be harmful for other queers” [Mark, participant #1], and, “I know [I’m] the not the best person in queer spaces; I mess up around pronouns sometimes” [Jordan, participant #6]. Others recognized the potential threat of their race in queer spaces. For example, Kevin, participant #5 said, “I know I come from a place of privilege […] I can't be wholly authentic in a queer space especially if it's for people of color because I don't have – I have to be very conscious of what I'm doing and what I'm saying because I want to be respectful of that space and keep it safe”. Another participant commented more generally about the conscious need to embody safety, meaning “being a safe person for other people [and having a] fear of violating the safety“ (Leah, participant #3). While this sensitivity expands “threat” in queer spaces, it arguably shows a degree of safety and belonging unseen in heteronormative spaces. By being able to acknowledge and act on the ways in which they personally make a space safe or unsafe, participants implicitly showed that they did not have to be as sensitive about their own vulnerability. “Safe” Places of Increased Vulnerability First, it is important to acknowledge the contradictions held within and between individual perceptions of safety and danger in queer spaces. There was not always consensus about what people thought of as safe or queer. Likewise, individuals’ perceptions of safety or threat were often complicated by them as they explained how they conceptualized, say, a queer space as safe before they teased out how queer spaces often failed to live up to this standard of “safety”. This does not invalidate the experiences of queer spaces as safe spaces. However, it does introduce a need to be more critical of the language used to talk about this safety. Queer spaces and the queer people who inhabit them did not always categorically fit into an individual's perception of safety, but they did always exceed feelings of safety in heteronormative spaces. Therefore, rather than thinking about perceptions of queer and heteronormative spaces as a binary of safe versus unsafe, we can think about them on a spectrum of safety, where queer exists as “safe” in relation to an at times unsafe but always less safe heteronormative. So how does this stand to be true when queer spaces make people more vulnerable? Part of this contraction lie in how “vulnerable” is being defined in both scholarly literature and mainstream media. Though not always, the dominant discourse of safety for queer individuals often focuses on physical and other forms of what could be considered “reportable” violence, e.g. verbal harassment and discrimination. This discourse can be seen mostly easily in the correlation of anti-queer violence with hate crimes, defined as: “maliciously or intentionally causing physical injury to a […] person, causing physical damage, to or destruction of the property of the […] person or threatening a specific person or group of persons and placing that person, or members of the specific group of persons, in reasonable fear of harm to person or property because of his or her perception of the victim’s [...] sexual orientation or gender identity” (“Hate Crimes”). 19 Plenum 2,1 (2105) This focus is understandable, given that these sorts of incidents are the most tangible for the individuals who experience them and for those who wish to act on them. However, as previously noted, these types of incidents only partially reflect the experiences of violence queer people encounter, given the overwhelming rate at which incidents are not reported to the police and other authorities (Boog et al., 2011). It also falls short in that it does not cover the types of violence experienced by queer people that do not have legal consequences. Furthermore, reportable violence does not reflect how participants thought of or at least prioritized their experiences and conceptualizations of violence. Even if they were more vulnerable to this type of violence in queer spaces, especially queer spaces that are highly visible to the public like much of Capitol Hill, it was not as influential in shaping their perceptions of safety. Instead, ontological safety was given preference in discussions of safety and threat in queer and heteronormative spaces. Given that queer spaces were found by the participants, as well as in other studies (see Myslik, 1996), to often be the only spaces where this type of safety was available to them, it becomes increasingly clear why queer spaces are first safer before they are ever considered sites of increased vulnerability. This can be succinctly summed up in the words of a participant discussing safety in queer spaces: “I feel safer in my identities as a queer and trans person” (Mark, participant #1). This safety can also be understood through the differential constructions of sexualized space, which could be placed not only on a spectrum of safety but also on a spectrum of public-private. This is not to say that unsafe spaces were always public and that private spaces were always safer, but that public spaces were often defaulted as heteronormative and queer spaces often blurred the line between public and private. While there were some public queer spaces, these spaces were almost always temporary, such as an event or other gathering of queer bodies happening in an otherwise non-queer space for a specified period of time. On the other hand, places that were permanent, such as the queer resource center at the University of Washington or a queer-identified bar, were not always private but they were not considered public space either. For participants, public spaces were hard to pin down – as one participant succinctly said, “I don't know how I would I define public space” (Julia, participant #7). However, public spaces were often idealized ideas of space that was “available to every member of the public” and were not policed to keep anyone out. Private spaces were equally complicated. Some participants said that private spaces were solely spaces that were “privately owned” (Adam, participant #4; Kevin, participant #5), while others felt that private spaces were any space that was exclusionary in any matter, informally or otherwise. This idea of public was implicitly sexualized as heteronormative, given the reasons they framed queer spaces as other than public space, particularly through the idea of a space being exclusionary. Participants heavily acknowledged the fact that there was rarely a place for visible queerness in heteronormative spaces. Curiously, participants only posited queer spaces as being exclusionary. For instance, according to one participant, “[Queer spaces] are usually like specifically designated to be aside from public space,” even though they believed for a space to public it had to be “accessible.” The fact that queer space needs to be set aside from this implicitly heteronormative space did not make the heteronormative space private and the fact that queer space was set aside made it less than public. Perhaps this is why another participant believed that “most queer spaces are private spaces” (Kevin, participant #5). 20 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” Understanding this relationship between queer and private gives us another perspective from which to understand the relationship between queer and safer. If queer spaces are private, and private spaces are exclusionary, then queer spaces were at least thought of as places that people, particularly non-queer people, could not or did not access. This imagined boundary – though at times real, such as the difference between one's queered private dwelling and the public sphere, – allowed participants to think of queer spaces as safer because only people who were part of the group were “allowed” to access it. Though this boundary could not keep threatening queer people out of the space, as participants have shown, they held queer people and spaces to a standard in which problematic behavior, while expected, was not acceptable and something they could act on, even if only through their own actions. In these “private” queer spaces, they have some agency to make the space safer. In “public” heteronormative spaces, they do not. Discussion/Conclusion This research, through a qualitative analysis of Seattle, queer spaces and conceptualizations of safety, only just begins to reveal a fraction of how complex everyday space is for queer people. While it has, on one hand, revealed just how subjective the experiences of sexualized spaces and safety are in Seattle for a small few who interact with both on a daily basis, it has also shown how important these subjective experiences are to how participants perceive the world. Further, it has demonstrated how these experiences, though at times discordant, often come together to form a collective understanding of what it means to navigate the world as a queer person. Space – however it is sexualized, however safe people feel it is – does not exist as a binary. Instead, it is tied up in a complex set of social relations that encompass not only sexuality and safety but also gender and race. These relations interact to create the contradictory nature both queer spaces and queer people have been found to hold. However, these contradictions do not make queer spaces as safe spaces any less real for the people who hold that to be true; they just complicate what “safe” means. This research also calls to attention what it means for queer people to inhabit a city like Seattle. In many ways, Seattle is an American ideal for what a queer – or at least queer friendly – city is, something that many of the participants agreed on. The existence and vibrancy of Capitol Hill is a testament to that. But we cannot only look toward Capitol Hill as a site of research if we want to understand what queer space is. Capitol Hill holds importance for Seattle's queer community, but as this project shows, so does the University of Washington campus, private homes, and—perhaps most importantly—the spaces that exist as queer only at certain times with certain people. Queer spaces are inherently as transient as one's daily geographies, and with them sexualized spaces are constantly in flux, being challenged and reinforced. So, too, are feelings of safety. As queer geographic research continues to grow, it is important for the conversation about safety to continue, as violence continues to dominate many of the experiences of queer people in the United States. 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Web. 26 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” Figure 1: Queer Spaces in Seattle 27 Plenum 2,1 (2105) Figure 2: Safe Spaces in Seattle 28 Breanna Hudson: “[I feel] safer in my identities” Figure 3: Unsafe Spaces in Seattle 29