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Not for Reproduction
Noted . Notable . Noteworthy . LGBT News & Views
Volume 24 . Number 13
October 31 . 2009
Printed on Recycled Paper
FREE
Everyone
loves to
‘Eat Out’
page 13
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OCTOBER 31 . 2009 • QNotes
T A B L E
O F
C O N T E N T S
Front and center:
MAP shuts down
Editorial Contributors:
01
Articles:
www.q-notes.com
Volume 24
Number 13
PO Box 221841 • Charlotte, NC 28222 • 704.531.9988 . 704.531.1361
October 31, 2009
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Publisher: Jim Yarbrough
Editor/New Media: Matt Comer
editor@q-notes.com
City bans performer
Clymore to lead state agency
Diocese distances itself
Election Day races endorsed
Hate crimes legislation passes
12
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09
04
05
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Drag Rag
Editor’s Note
General Gayety
Guest Commentary
Letter from a Soldier
News Notes: Domestic
News Notes: NC
On Being a Gay Parent
Out and About
Out in the Stars
Q-Poll
Tell Trinity
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3
P E R S P E C T I V E
Editor’s Note
by Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff
Singer ban not a
Free Speech issue
On Oct. 19, Q-Notes picked up the story of
a popular, regional Country singer in the
Piedmont and southwest Virginia and the antigay lyrics he used when singing a legendary
Country song at a small town fall festival. The
story appears in this print issue, as well.
Reidsville’s WGSR 47 first reported the
story and was able to talk to Reidsville City
Manager Kelly Almond, who took exception to
what he described as “tasteless” and “inappropriate” language used by Matt Boswell and his
Hillbilly Blues Band.
At the city-sponsored event at a downtown, city-owned venue, Boswell inserted his
own lyrics to Merle Haggard’s “Are the Good
Times Really Over for Good?”
Boswell sang,“Well you’ll never take my
guns, and I’ll pray anywhere that I please./My
daddy always told me, if you were able, and
didn’t work then you don’t eat./All you Wall
Street bankers, as far as I’m concerned, you
can all go to Hell./And you can’t get married,
you stupid gays and queers, so why don’t you
go somewhere else?”
Upon viewing recordings of the performance,Almond wasn’t happy.
“It was absolutely unacceptable and certainly unacceptable at a city-owned venue and
city-sponsored event,” he told Q-Notes.
Almond said Boswell wouldn’t be welcome
at any future city-sponsored events. He told
WGSR,“I can assure everyone involved that, if
this language was used, this person or anyone
representing him, will not play another city
event. Market Square, and indeed all city venues, are places meant to bring people together,
not divide them.We certainly support tasteful,
patriotic acts.We also have to respect everyone’s Free Speech rights. However, we don’t
have to pay for it or include it in a city sponsored event, and we will not.”
Since then, two Reidsville City Council
members have voiced their support of
Almond’s decision.
Reaction from LGBT community
members and straight folks has been
mixed.Many have applauded Almond
and his decision to ban any future
appearances by Boswell.Others say the
situation is a Free Speech issue,and that
Boswell’s rights have been trampled.
I am a Free Speech advocate. I’m a lover of
the First Amendment.Without it, I’d not have
a job and I wouldn’t have been able to freely
speak out and be involved in activism and
advocacy through high school and college.
The First Amendment is a necessary and
treasured part of America.
But, we should be clear: This is not a Free
Speech issue.
Let me repeat that, just for good measure:
This is not a Free Speech issue.
Boswell is free to say whatever he likes,wherever he likes and whenever he likes in his private
life.But when he is paid to perform,he is beholden to the desires and wishes of those who pay
him.If the purchaser of his talent,in this case
the City of Reidsville,decides she doesn’t like the
talent or is uncomfortable with the content of his
talent,the purchaser has every right of their own
to choose not to pay for his talent again.That’s
what City Manager Kelly Almond has done.
Tomorrow or any day past, present or
future, Boswell has the right and the freedom
to travel back to Reidsville and set up his own
stage in the town’s square and sing to his
heart’s content. He could include whatever
lyrics he wanted. Just not on the city’s dime.
Almond and the City of Reidsville deserve
praise for their decision to use taxpayer funds in
such a way that honors and includes all citizens
and taxpayers of their community.While no bastion of liberal or progressive politics,and certainly no extremely LGBT-friendly place,
Reidsville has proven that it is a town where,at
the least,citizens and community members will
be treated kindly.They’ve taken a stand and said
taxpayer funds won’t be used to call citizens
“stupid”and tell longtime neighbors,friends,
sons and daughters to “go somewhere else.”
Reidsville and Rockingham County should
be proud of their leaders and their commitment
to treat all citizens with respect and civility. Q
Nov. 3 is Election Day
November 3 is Election Day for many municipalities this year.Be sure to head
out to the polls and submit your ballot.In an off-year election,voter turnout will
likely be lower than usual,so we hope our community shows its strength by turning out to vote for pro-LGBT and progressive-minded candidates.
The Mecklenburg Gay and Lesbian Political Action Committee (MeckPAC) released their endorsements for the Charlotte mayoral, city council and school board races in October. Those endorsements
can be viewed at their website. Democrat Anthony Foxx was MeckPAC’s pick for mayor.
On the evening of Nov. 3 and the morning of Nov. 4, be sure to surf over to Q-Notes’s website at
for the most up-to-date news on election results for LGBT-friendly and progressive candidates. Q
aspeakout b
Send your letter to the editor or any
other thoughts to
editor@q-notes.com or click on over to
our website at www.q-notes.com and
join the conversation there.
Web comments will be featured in each
issue. Limit letters to the editor to 150
words or less and include
your name, city and state and a phone
number where you can be reached.
4
Was it appropriate for
Reidsville to ban any future,
publicly-funded
performances by Country
singer Matt Boswell?
See the options and vote at
www.q-notes.com/qpoll
L E G I S L A T I O N
LGBTs win federal hate crimes protections
Carolinas senators and reps
split on support
Legislation to expand hate crimes coverage to those targeted for their sexual orientation, gender, gender-identity and disability
cleared its last hurdle on Oct. 22. The U.S.
Senate voted 68-29 to pass the measure. As of
press time, President Barack Obama had yet
to sign the bill, but was expected to approve
the legislation before the end of October.
Senators from the Carolinas were split on
the legislation. North Carolina Democrat Kay
Hagan voted yes on the legislation, but
Republican Richard Burr voted no. Both senators from South Carolina, Republicans Jim
DeMint and Lindsay Graham, also voted no.
The New York Times reported that DeMint
agreed hate crimes were terrible.“That’s why
they are already illegal,” he said. The Times
also reported that DeMint thought the legislation was dangerous and an “‘Orwellian’ step
toward ‘thought crime.’”
This year’s historic passage of the hate
crimes legislation first cleared the U.S. House by
a vote of 281-146. The Carolinas delegation also
split in that vote. Six Democratic House members from North Carolina voted for the legislation, along with South Carolina’s two
Democratic representatives. The rest of South
Carolina’s delegation, all Republicans, voted
against the bill. In North Carolina, all
Republicans and two Democrats voted no.
National LGBT advocacy organizations
were also pleased to see the bill head to
Obama’s desk.
“The Senate’s decision to pass this bill sends a
clear message that the civil rights of every
American are worth protecting and defending,”
said Sharon J.Lettman,executive director of the
National Black Justice Coalition.“No one should
have to live their life in fear of violence simply for
living their life openly.”
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force
Executive Director Rea Carey said the time for
such progressive policy changes is expected by
Americans in 2009.
“Americans are hungry for this type of positive change,” she said.“They do not want to see
their LGBT friends, family, neighbors and coworkers subjected to violence simply for living
their lives. Laws embody the values of our
nation; when this critical legislation becomes
law, our nation will — once and for all — send
the unmistakable message that it rejects and
condemns hate violence against its people.”
The movement to enact hate crimes protections for LGBT people has been a high profile
component of LGBT advocacy work since the
murder of Wyoming college student Matthew
Shepard in 1998. His murder and its aftermath
in smalltown Laramie, well-known to many
across the country, have been documented by a
nationally-acclaimed play that was later turned
into a movie.“The Laramie Project” recently
celebrated its 10th anniversary with a new epi-
logue performed in over 100 theatres in each
of the 50 states. Five performances of the epilogue took place in the Carolinas.
On the day of the Senate’s approval,the
Shepard Foundation released a statement from
Dennis and Judy Shepard,Matt’s parents:
“Dennis and I are extremely proud of the
Senate for once again passing this historic
Task Force leader Rae Carey praised the
measure of protection for victims of these brupassage
of hate crimes protections, which
tal crimes.Knowing that the president will sign
it,unlike his predecessor,has made all the hard her group has been working on since 1981.
work this year to pass it worthwhile.Hate crimes
House
continue to affect far too many Americans who
North Carolina
are simply trying to live their lives honestly,and
Coble (R) — NAY
they need to know that their government will
Butterfield (D) — AYE
protect them from violence,and provide approEtheridge (D) — AYE
priate justice for victims and their families.”
Foxx (R) — NAY
The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force first
Jones (R) — NAY
began organizing for an anti-LGBT hate crimes
Kissell (D) — AYE
legislation in 1981.In 1990,the Hate Crimes
McHenry (R) — NAY
Statistics Act was enacted to gather detailed
McIntyre (D) — NAY
reports on criminal acts motivated by bias
Miller (D) — AYE
against a person’s race,ethnicity,religious,gender,
Myrick (R) — NAY
sexual orientation and other characteristics.Q
Price (D) — AYE
••••
Watt (D) — AYE
Shuler (D) — NAY
By the vote
South Carolina
Senate
Barrett (R) — NAY
North Carolina
Brown (R) — NAY
Burr (R) — NAY
Clyburn (D) — AYE
Hagan (D) — AYE
Inglis (R) — NAY
South Carolina
Spratt (D) — AYE
DeMint (R) — NAY
Wilson (R) — NAY
Graham (R) — NAY
5
H E A L T H C A R E
Raleigh AIDS org exec to lead
state HIV agency
Jacquelyn Clymore leaves Alliance
of AIDS Services
by Matt Comer. Q-Notes staff
For 20 years, Jacquelyn Clymore has
worked with Raleigh’s HIV/AIDS care community. On Oct. 23, her two-decade relationship with community-based AIDS services
and care came to an end. In November,
Clymore will begin work as the “state AIDS
director,” taking her position as head of the
the HIV/STD Prevention and Care branch of
the North Carolina Department of Health
and Human Services. Clymore replaces longtime director Evelyn Foust, a strident advocate for those living with and affected by
HIV and AIDS.
Her departure from Alliance of AIDS
Services-Carolina is bittersweet, said new
Alliance interim executive director John Paul
Womble, an HIV-positive gay man who has
worked on advocacy and treatment issues
for years.
“I personally feel like I’ve lost my personal
mentor, my best friend,” Womble said.
Clymore’s first career calling wasn’t in medical care or HIV treatment and prevention. In
the 1980s, she worked for several advertising
agencies in New York City where many of her
close friends and colleagues were gay.
When the AIDS crisis hit, Clymore was
personally affected.
“I was working with lots of creative people.
Many were gay men,” she said.“Starting in 1984,
suddenly they would get sick and would die.”
A close friend and colleague became sick
and Clymore took extra notice.
“After he died, there was a lot of that office
chit-chat,” she said.“They would whisper,‘He
was gay.’ This was an award-winning creative
artist people were talking about in this way. He
was a great guy, a great professional. I was
offended by the way people were discussing
his illness and his death. I thought it was
wrong and I told myself I needed to be
involved in this and learn more about it.”
Clymore left New York City and enrolled at
the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill.
Earning her Masters of Science, with a specialty in rehabilitation, counseling and psychology, she began work with the AIDS
Service Agency of Wake County.
At the time, the agency was a new organization just established to service those with
HIV and AIDS. Later, the agency merged with
others to form the current Alliance of AIDS
Services.
“I was just at the right place at the right
time,” Clymore said.“The organization just
kept growing and I got to grow with it.”
Each time she thought it was time to apply
her skills in new ways, Clymore said she was
able to take new positions at the group and
continue her service there. Five years ago, she
was named executive director.
Looking back at her career, Clymore easily
sees a change in how the nation and society
have grown since the early days of the epidemic.
“We still have a long ways to go,” she
admitted,“but I think we are more than
halfway there.When I think back to those
6
Jacquelyn Clymore, former executive
director of Raleigh’s Alliance of AIDS
Services, has been hired as the new
state AIDS director.
days 20 or 25 years ago, there was no conception that maybe straight people were at risk.
Now, we do all know that if you are sexually
active, you are risk period.”
Womble praises Clymore for her ability to
connect with all types of people. It is a muchneeded talent in a field where many at-risk populations are racial, ethnic or sexual minorities.
“Jacquelyn is an ally to diversity,” Womble
said.“She’s keenly aware of issues related to the
LGBT community, to the African-American
community, to the Hispanic community.”
He thinks the state will benefit from
Clymore’s experience.“They’ve gained a new
brand and style of leadership, equal to any in
the past and surpassing anything in the future.”
Her experience as a community-based
service provider will be of benefit to Clymore
when it comes time to allocate funds,Womble
said:“In an economic downturn, when dollars
are very tight, I can think of no one better.
She’s coming from the non-profit world and
she’s used to working with limited resources.
Who better to sit in a chair on a statewide
level and help the state learn how to manage
resources like a non-profit?”
Clymore’s ready for the challenge and she
knows governmental work will be a change
from her past as a non-profit leader. She said
putting a caring face on big government is one
of her goals.
Womble has full faith in Clymore and her
ability to get the job done.Although sad to see
her leave her non-profit roots,Womble said he
has full faith in Clymore’s ability to get the job
done. Lost friends and loved ones would
agree, he said.
“She’s efficient, expedient and focused on
the clients and community,” he said.“I’d just
like to say on behalf of all the clients we have
lost that is is shame they can’t be here to say
goodbye and to say thank you to her service to
the Alliance and good luck with the state.” Q
H E A L T H C A R E
Metrolina AIDS Project comes to an end
Organization’s board offers no in-depth comment; other local groups prepare for influx of clients
inDepth
After almost 25 years of service to the
greater Charlotte-metro area, a local AIDS
service organization has made the decision to
close shop in the midst of internal problems,
staff resignations, dwindling resources and
claims of financial mismanagement.
Metrolina AIDS Project (MAP), originally
founded by six gay men in 1985, has faced a
tumultuous two years. Q-Notes first reported
on some financial problems in February 2008
and again in January and February this year.
On Oct. 22, the MAP board of directors
made the decision to close the organization,
according to a press release issued on Oct. 23.
As of press time, the organization had not
decided on an exact date for the group’s closure.
The board said the decision to close came
“after it could not find a viable way to continue operating the agency in light of the
current economic environment and other
internal challenges.”
Credentials questioned
The decision to fold came less than a week
after the board announced to staff that executive director Dr. Jose R. Hennessey Diaz had
been placed on temporary suspension pending an investigation into “reports on matters
of significance,” according to an Oct. 19 email
from board chair Shawn McMaster obtained
by Q-Notes on Oct. 21.
At the request of the board, Diaz resigned
his position with MAP on Oct. 23, according to
the release.
It is not clear why Diaz was first suspended
or why the board later asked him to resign.
Diaz has been unwilling to speak about the
specifics which led up to the suspension and
resignation. Contacted by Q-Notes on Oct. 22,
McMaster declined to comment on Diaz’s suspension and other internal issues.
“Metrolina AIDS Project considers internal
personnel matters and operations confidential,” McMaster said.“We do not provide comments to the press on such matters.”
Despite the official silence,questions regarding Diaz’s medical credentials have circulated
among LGBT community members for months.
In a curriculum vitae (C.V.) obtained by
Q-Notes earlier this year,Diaz claimed to have
received medical licenses from the New York and
California medical boards in 1994 and 2000.
Several searches of the California and New
York medical board databases by Q-Notes staff
and medical board officials showed no results
for Diaz.
Candis Cohen, public information officer
at the California Medical Board, told Q-Notes
she could find no record of Diaz under that
name and spelling or under the name and
spelling of Hennessey.
When contacted by Q-Notes , Diaz was
uncomfortable speaking on internal matters at
MAP. He did, however, address the rumors
regarding his licensing.
Diaz said he never intended to mislead
anyone by listing the California and New York
medical licenses on his C.V.
“It’s not there to deceive anyone,” he said.
“Anyone can go on the [board] website to
find out. Since 1990, anyone can go in and
put in my name and information and it will
not pop up.”
Diaz said he worked under provisional
medical licenses while overseeing research
studies with Bronx Lebanon Hospital Center
in New York and the University of CaliforniaSan Francisco.
“You cannot become licensed until you have
completed a full residency and passed level one
and two of your boards and level three,” he said.
“I didn’t go through that process. I came here as
a foreign medical graduate.”
While in Charlotte, Diaz said practicing
medicine was not a part of his duties.
“My role at MAP was not to be a doctor,” he
said.“it was to be the executive director and to
bring the organization up to quality. I had a
whole team of doctors who did medical stuff.”
According to his C.V., Diaz received his M.D.
from the University of Buenos Aires in 1990. He
worked at several hospitals in Argentina
through the 1990s and several in the U.S. from
the mid-1990s to the present. He has also served
in several teaching positions at several schools
of medicine.When he moved to Charlotte, Diaz
was working as a consultant with the U.S.
Department of Health and Human Services’
Health Resources and Services Administration.
Unethical practices
Over the past six months, as many as a
dozen or more MAP staff have either resigned
their positions with the group or been laid off,
according to Oltz and a second source who
wished to remain anonymous for the purposes of a news story.
Oltz, a former MAP board member and
president, had been working as associate
director before the initial shake-up in early
2009. He was subsequently laid off but rehired
three days later to work on accounting as an
assistant to current CFO Beatrice Black. [Ed.
Note — Black seems to use both that name and
a last name of Simpkins. For the purposes of
this article, Q-Notes will use her name as it was
listed on MAP’s website.]
Oltz resigned from his position on Oct. 14.
“I cannot in good conscience continue
working in this politically charged atmosphere
and condone practices which I feel are unethical,” Oltz wrote in an email to MAP’s staff and
board, and obtained by Q-Notes on Oct. 21.
Oltz said that arguments and disagreements between Diaz, Black and McMaster
made the working environment uncomfortable. He thought several instances of “mismanagement of donor dollars” were unethical.
“The agency had gone from a $3.2 million
budget to a $1.6 million budget but [Diaz]’s
salary is up to $96,000, Beatrice Black’s is
$85,000 and a third person who is over client
services, hers is at $88,000,” he said.“Three
people making those salaries at such a small
organization is like a Gloria Pace King-United
Way scenario.”
Diaz told Q-Notes his salary was $91,000.
According to MAP’s 2007-2008 IRS 990
returns, former executive director Ann White
was paid a yearly salary of $78,000 with an
additional $4,605 in benefits. During his
employment as associate director, Oltz was
paid a salary of $67,492 with benefits totaling
$5,091. Two other staff members made
salaries of $61,758 and $54,080; both had
benefits totaling $4,605.
The same IRS returns showed the organization had a total revenue of $2.3 million.
Their expenses totaled $2.6 million with a
$259,906 deficit.
Other anonymous reports claimed MAP
was paying housing costs for both Diaz and
Black. Oltz said those costs totaled $3,000 per
month, but Diaz claimed the housing costs
were only $2,300 and part of his and Black’s
contract with the organization.
Further, Oltz said he noticed personal
expenses being charged to MAP credit cards,
confirming anonymous reports that both Diaz
and Black had used MAP credit cards for nonbusiness expenses.
Again, Diaz said the non-business expenses were part of his and Black’s contract. Diaz
claimed he was only working 80 percent of full
time and was allowed travel expenses to
return to his home in New York.
Debt and grants
Unconfirmed reports from two anonymous
source indicated that MAP had difficulties
meeting payroll each pay period and was working under a heavy debt as high as $500,000.
Oltz confirmed the group had been operating under some debt.“I haven’t seen the
reports since I left there, but [the debt] is
lower than that. The last time I saw the
reports, though, the organization had a negative net worth of $400,000.”
The same source told Q-Notes that some
grant monies might have been put on hold.
Tara Balsley, of the Health Resources and
Services Administration’s communications
office, said her agency had increased their
oversight of federal Ryan White grant funds
going to the organization.
“We have imposed a ‘restricted draw down’
on grant funds, this means that HRSA staff
review all invoices before payments can be
made to local providers,” Balsley wrote in an
email to Q-Notes before learning of MAP’s decision to close.“HRSA staff has been providing
advice and expertise to the grantee to ensure
that essential HIV/AIDS services are in place.”
At press time, Balsley was unavailable for
further comment on MAP’s closure.
United Way assisting with transition
The United Way of Central Carolinas is
assisting MAP with their transition, according
to United Way Vice President of Community
Building Chris Jackson.
“It is early to say exactly what will happen
[with MAP],” Jackson said.“We’ve been in
touch with their board, obviously, working
with them on their transition plan.We’re
focusing on trying to help as much as we can
with the clients they are currently serving to
see if there are other organizations who can
support those clients.”
Annual contributions from the United Way
totaled as much as nine percent of MAP’s
annual budget but was reduced significantly
this year. Jackson said his agency would take a
look at the appropriated money and allocate
those funds to other United Way agencies that
are serving individuals living with HIV/AIDS.
In February, the United Way of Central
Carolinas board of directors had voted to
place MAP on a probationary status. Since
that time, MAP had been providing regular
updates on their sustainability to the agency.
Jackson said MAP officials had kept the
United Way abreast of Diaz’s suspension and
other issues throughout the group’s latest ordeal.
Community impact
Once serving as many as 1,400 people per
year, MAP’s demise will leave a remarkable
void in HIV/AIDS care and case management
in the Charlotte area.
Oltz, who’s been involved with MAP in
some fashion for over 10 years, said he wished
the group could have found a way to stay open.
“I had hoped the board would come to the
conclusion to change management and maybe
change the board and start fresh, continuing
to serve the clients they’ve served all these
years,” he said.“I’m saddened to hear about
the closing, but maybe it is time.”
John Paul Womble, interim executive director of Raleigh’s Alliance of AIDS Services, told
Q-Notes his organization would help former
MAP clients as much as they could.
“Sincerely hope that all people living with
HIV in MAP’s service area have access to services at other locations,” Womble said.“If we at
see MAP on 8
7
H E A L T H C A R E
MAP closes
from page 7
the Alliance of AIDS Services can be of any
assistance they are welcome to call us and we
will help them find services.”
Womble, an advocate for HIV/AIDS management and treatment programs for years,
said he understood MAP’s decision to close,
yet the action would come as a community
and a personal loss.
“I find it saddening and it breaks my heart
to see that happen after the hard work leaders
in the community such as Les Kooyman and
countless others did to build a stable organization for those living with HIV/AIDS,” he said.
Rev. Debbie Warren, executive director of
Charlotte’s Regional AIDS Interfaith Network
(RAIN), echoed Womble’s sentiments.
“This is a big loss for the community and
folks are going to be grieving that,” Warren, an
ordained Baptist minister, said.“I think it is a
sad time for a lot of the staff who have worked
so diligently through the years, certainly for the
folks who founded the organization and particularly for the consumers who I think some
are going to be very vulnerable after this.”
Warren said she and her staff would be
meeting to discuss strategy and preparation
for taking on new clients and extending
RAIN’s services.
“We’d certainly not like to see any big
gaps,” she said. Warren said she’d expressed
to Mecklenburg County Health Department
officials her organization’s “willingness to
work with the health department and the
HIV/AIDS staff members over there in any
way that is needed to help respond to the
consumers who are going to be needing to
move their services over to RAIN or to the
health department or to another organization in town.”
Warren said her organization had been
preparing for increased community needs for
at least two years.
“We’ve been increasing our case management staff,” she said.“We have an R.N. on staff
now.We are working with First United
Methodist Church to open a primary care
clinic in early 2010.”
She said if funds became available, RAIN
would hope to fill the void left by MAP’s closure, as well as serving clients’ emotional and
spiritual needs.
“If we can’t find the funding, we are certainly going to prioritize to deliver the most
compelling services that folks are calling for,”
Warren said.“I suspect that is going to be case
management, support groups and for us,
chaplaincy care and emotional support.” Q
This is a developing story. As such,
some details might have changed
since press time. For the most up-todate information and late-breaking
news, visit www.q-notes.com.
MAP: A tumultous history
MAP has served thousands of Charlottearea patients with HIV. Despite their legacy of
good work, the organization also has a history
riddled with internal struggles, financial difficulties and an uneasiness with public LGBTaffirmation.
Fall 1985 — During the height of the AIDS
crisis, six gay men make the decision to form
an AIDS service organization to meet the
needs of Charlotte area individuals contracting HIV.
July 16, 1986 — MAP’s articles of incorporation are filed with the North Carolina
Secretary of State.
Aug. 1990 — Chaired by MAP board president Sister Mary Thomas Burke, the organization’s “Program Review Panel” rejects a gaythemed HIV prevention and condom-use
advertisement. Depicting two young men
draped in an American flag, a federal judge
involved in a lawsuit over other local “Program
Review Panels” said it was “difficult to explain”
why MAP rejected the seemingly innocent ad.
July 8,1991 — MAP’s board of directors votes
no confidence in openly gay executive director
John Conley and asks him to resign after he
publicly acknowledged his sexual orientation at
an AIDS Quilt exhibit in Charlotte.In a later
interview with Q-Notes,Conley claims he was
told not to use the word “gay”in a MAP newsletter.Following Conley’s ouster,three MAP staffers
and four volunteers also leave the organization.
1993 — A routine United Way review and
audit reveal serious internal problems and
financial difficulties for MAP, including deficiencies in policy and procedure, inadequate
documentation and record-keeping of Ryan
White CARE Act-funded programs and services and inappropriate coordinate of care.At the
time, funding from the Regional HIV/AIDS
8
Consortium is put on hold.
Dec. 1993 — MAP treasurer Stephen
O’Shields is arrested and charged with embezzling nearly $118,000 from the organization.
Sept. 1994 — Stephen O’Shields is sentenced
to six months in jail and ordered to repay the
money he embezzled from MAP.
Oct. 1996 — Infighting and disagreements
among staff result in the resignation of
MAP Executive director Barbara Rein and
the termination or resignation of a halfdozen other employees including three
department directors.
Feb. 2008 — Carolina Celebration, a primarily
gay men’s philanthropic organization,
announces it will quit contributing to MAP
amidst concerns the AIDS organization is
mismanaging funds and moving away from
serving the gay community. Carolina
Celebration had contributed tens of thousands
of dollars to MAP each year.
Jan. 2009 — MAP comes close to closure
when it is revealed the organization’s Ryan
White CARE Act funding is put on hold pending “a routine review.” MAP officials say the
funding hold stemmed partly from organizational problems surrounding the opening of
MAP’s Metrolina Care Network Clinic and a
failure to get approval for Medicare and
Medicaid reimbursements.
August 2009 — MAP announces that Dr. Jose
Diaz will become executive director and that
the Health Resources and Services
Administration has approved a recovery plan
for the organization, which will aim to
restructure the group’s service delivery toward
a clinical care approach.
Fall 2009 — Disagreements among staff and
financial problems lead to staff resignations, lay
offs and the decision to shutter MAP’s doors. Q
S O U T H
C A R O L I N A
Diocese distances itself from Episcopal Church
Convention delegates approve four of
five resolutions
Meeting in Columbia on Oct. 23, 300 delegates from parishes in the Diocese of South
Carolina voted to distance themselves from
the national Episcopal Church.
The diocese, which includes Columbia and
all of Coastal South Carolina, has been opposed
to the national church’s movement to include
LGBT people in the full life of the church.
South Carolina’s special convention was
restricted to delegates, and visitors and the
media were barred from attending. Four of
five proposed resolutions were approved.
The first resolution, approved by 86.7 percent of those in attendance, reaffirmed the
diocese’s commitment to live “under the
authority of Holy Scripture” and “the unique
Lordship of Jesus Christ.”
The second resolution, approved by clergy
87-17 and by parishes 39-8, authorized the bishop and diocesan standing committees to “begin
withdrawing from all bodies of the Episcopal
Church that have assented to actions contrary to
Holy Scripture, the doctrine, discipline and worship of Christ …until such bodies show a willingness to repent of such actions.”
The Rev. Canon Kendall Harmon, theologian for the diocese, characterized the second
resolution as “a withdrawal from some of the
national councils of the church. It’s about as
far as you can get but still be in,” according to
Episcopal Life, the U.S. denomination’s independent monthly newspaper.
A third approved resolution encouraged
congregations to “enter into their own
Missional Relationships with orthodox congregations isolated across North America.” The
fourth resolution endorsed one of three versions of a new Anglican Covenant proposed by
worldwide Anglican Church leaders in 2003.
The last resolution had called on members
of the diocese to condemn anti-LGBT prejudice, while “speak[ing] the truth in love.”
“This Diocese will not condone prejudice
or deny the dignity of any person, including
but not limited to, those who believe themselves to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered,” the resolution read.“Nevertheless, we
will speak the truth in love as Holy Scripture
commends for the amendment of life required
of disciples of Christ. It is love of neighbor and
the abiding concern for their spiritual well
being that compels such honesty and will
never allow us to remain silent.”
The Diocese of South Carolina was originally formed in 1706 and re-organized in
1785. The diocese is home to 76 parishes and
close to 30,000 members. Bishop Mark
Lawrence opposed the election of openly gay
New Hampshire Bishop Gene Robinson in
2003. In 2006, the diocese rejected the authority of U.S. Episcopal Presiding Bishop
Katharine Jefferts Schori. The diocese also
opposed two LGBT-affirming resolutions pre-
sented and approved at the denomination’s
national convention earlier this year.
Several congregations and some dioceses
across the country have voted to leave the
U.S. Episcopal Church.
In October, the Vatican announced new regulations for accepting “disaffected Anglicans”
into Roman Catholic membership, allowing
entire groups of Anglicans to become Roman
Catholics and their priests to remain married. Q
Guest Commentary
and Kendall Harmon must
pray daily that they could
have Fred Phelp’s spine.
Instead, they sugar coat
their bigotry to the point
that the entire diocese is
on the verge of succumbing to a diabetic coma. Why not just say what
you want to say, Bishop Lawrence?
With the conclusion of the convention, this
30-year discussion is now over.As soon as
Bishop Lawrence and Kendall Harmon can
figure out a way to abscond with the diocesan
treasury and church lands they’ll be heading
for the exit. My suggestion to them and the 39
parishes who voted to disengage from everything but the pension fund of the national
church: Don’t let the screen door hit you on
the way out!
It’s time for those who care about our community to get back to helping those in need and
doing the work that so desperately needs to be
done here.We have wasted enough time appeasing the bigots who for the moment are running
the Episcopal Diocese of South Carolina.We
were here when they got here and we’ll be here
when they’re gone.God bless their little hearts! Q
by Charlie Smith, Charleston, S.C.
Special convention a step toward schism
Four of the five anti-gay resolutions presented at the Special Convention of the Episcopal
Diocese of South Carolina were easily passed by
the clergy and lay delegates on Oct. 23.
The fifth resolution, a condescending bit of
triteness, resolved “not to condone prejudice
or deny the dignity of any person, including
but not limited to, those who believe themselves to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered,” but to continue to “speak the truth in
love as Holy Scripture commends.”
That resolution was tabled for a future discussion, which of course will never happen. I
guess the delegates figured that since the truth
had not been spoken all day,“Why start now?”
The only difference between Bishop
Lawrence and the gay-funeral-picketing Rev.
Fred Phelps is that Phelps has enough integrity to say what he means and mean what he
says. He hates gay people and he puts that
hatred right in your face. Bishop Lawrence
9
D O M E S T I C
Gay-Straight Alliance student clubs registered from coast to coast.
The Ally Week pledge, which students
and adults sign through pledge cards in
school or online at www.allyweek.org, reads:
“I believe all students, regardless of sexual
orientation or gender identity/expression
deserve to feel safe and supported. That
means I pledge to not use anti-LGBT language or slurs; intervene, if I safely can, in
situations where students are being
harassed; and, support efforts to end bullying and harassment.
According to GLSEN's 2007 National
School Climate Survey of 6,209 LGBT students in middle and high school, nearly
nine out of 10 LGBT students experience
harassment at school and 61 percent feel
unsafe at school because of their sexual
orientation.
National News Notes
by David Stout . Q-Notes staff
Gay adoption bill introduced
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Rep. Pete Stark
(D-CA) has introduced the Every Child
Deserves a Family Act (HR 3827) which
would codify sexual orientation non-discrimination in foster care placements and adoptions nationwide. According to reports, there
are approximately 65,500 adopted children
being raised by lesbian or gay parents. LGBT
singles and couples are also raising an estimated three percent of children in the foster
care system.
While Florida is the only state with an
express ban on adoption by LGBT individuals, as of 2008, seven states either expressly
restrict adoption by LGBT couples or had
laws and policies that may have the effect of
restricting LGBT parents from adopting. In
addition, four states restrict LGBT individuals from becoming foster parents. These
restrictions fly in the face of 30 years of scientific research which shows overwhelmingly
that children raised in same-sex headed
households do just as well emotionally and
psychologically as children raised in heterosexual households.
“All decisions concerning the health
and welfare of the country's most vulnerable children should be made solely with
their best interest in mind,” said Jennifer
Chrisler, executive director of the Family
Equality Council, a national organization
devoted to securing equality for LGBT
families. “We look forward to working
with Congressman Stark to educate members of Congress and the public about why
non-discrimination in adoption is a
national child welfare issue that needs to
be addressed.”
Lesbian up for first gay marshal
MINNEAPOLIS, Minn. — President
Barack Obama has nominated Minneapolis’
assistant police chief Sharon Lubinski as the
next U.S. Marshal for the District of
Minnesota, making her the first openly gay
U.S. Marshal nominee. She has served in the
Minneapolis Police Department for 20 years,
and previously in the Dane County Sherrif’s
Department in Madison,WI.
Sen.Amy Klobuchar, who originally recommended Lubinski, said her “mix of experience managing a large, urban police department and working in a more rural sherriff’s
office sets her apart and makes her uniquely
qualified to serve in this new role.”
Lubinski, who must still be confirmed by
the Senate, would become only the second
currently active female U.S. Marshal in the
country. The 94 U.S. Marshals protect federal
court officials, buildings and witnesses in each
of their respective districts.
Students pledge LGBT support
NEW YORK, N.Y. — According to the Gay,
Lesbian and Straight Education Network,
thousands of students across the country
pledged to address anti-gay bullying as part of
the fifth annual Ally Week, Oct. 19-23. The
event is highlighted by activities designed to
encourage people to be allies against antiLGBT name-calling, bullying and harassment
at school.Ally week was created by students
and is often organized by the more than 4,000
10
Historic grant aids gay seniors
LOS ANGELES, Calif. — Advocates for
older LGBT people are hailing a decision by
the U.S.Administration on Aging to award a
highly competitive new grant to a local LGBT
aging services program at the L.A. LGBT
Community Service Center. The grant was one
of over a dozen distributed to community
organizations serving diverse older adult communities and the first ever for an LGBT service provider.
“More and more LGBT seniors have been
coming to the Center for help as they've been
battered by the bad economy,” said Lorri L.
Jean, the facility's chief executive officer.“This
first-of-its-kind federal grant will help us significantly increase the vital services the Center
offers to LGBT seniors who are often isolated
and may lack the resources they need to make
ends meet.”
Michael Adams, executive director of
SAGE, the leading non-profit agency dedicated
to serving LGBT older people, said,“For many
years, the LGBT community's programs for
our elders have been ignored and shut out by
federal funders.We are very pleased to see the
Obama Administration right that wrong as a
matter of policy and take an important step
forward in recognizing the needs of LGBT
older adults.”
Teacher rapped for classroom slur
GENEVA, Ill. — A teacher at Geneva
High School has been disciplined for using
anti-gay slurs during a class discussion on
taxation and the National Endowment for
the Arts. Consumer education teacher David
Burk was reprimanded by the school district for asking students,“How would you
feel about your tax dollars going to pay
some black fag in New York to take pictures
of other black fags?”
Jordan Hunter, a 17-year-old senior who
was in the class, reached out to the Gay and
Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation about
the situation. He told GLAAD this was not
the first time Burk had used the slur and
requested help in bringing the story to the
public. Hunter's efforts resulted in The
Chicago Tribune publishing two major pieces
on the matter.
Geneva School District 304 responded by
placing a letter of reprimand in Burk’s permanent file and the school board issued a written
warning calling his behavior “unacceptable.”
Burk issued an apology for his “innappropriate” remarks. Q
N O R T H
C A R O L I N A
North Carolina News Notes
its 20th anniversary
celebration. On Dec. 4
by Lainey Millen & Matt Comer . Q-Notes staff and 5 at 7:30 p.m., get on
board for “Sleigh Bells” at the
CHARLOTTE Unitarian Universalist Church of Charlotte,
234 N. Sharon Amity Rd. Want to warm up
Relax…
a little after the winter? Then visit
“Southern Belles” with special guests from
CHARLOTTE — Wayne Brown will be
the University of North Carolina-Charlotte’s
holding Chen-style Tai Chi Chuan classes at
The Lesbian & Gay Community Center, 820
Women’s Chorus and Northwest School of
Hamilton St., Suite B11, from 6:30-8 p.m.
the Arts on March 26 and 27, 2010 at 7:30
beginning on Nov. 9.
p.m. at Heaton Hall, Myers Park Baptist
This blend of disciplines is a fitness exerChurch, 1900 Queens Rd. Just in time for
cise and internal martial art that cultivates life
summer vacation, enjoy “School Bells: Our
energy (Chi) to enhance health and achieve
20th Anniversary Reunion” concert on June
mind-body balance.
19, 2010, at 7:30 p.m. at Booth Playhouse,
November introductory sessions are free.A
Blumenthal Performing Arts Center, 130 N.
$35 per month fee will be charged for those who
Tryon St.
choose to continue in December and beyond.
For more information, email
Space is limited and pre-registration is
info@onevoicechorus.com or visit
required.
www.onevoice.com.
Proceeds will benefit the Center.
TRIAD
For more information, call Brown at 704469-0926 or email taichicharlotte@aol.com.
Bigger than life
Much appreciation
DAVIDSON — “Thanks to You,” a free
recital by Sotto Voce, an ensemble from One
Voice Chorus, will be held on Nov. 13 at 7:30
p.m. at St.Albans Episcopal Church, 301
Caldwell Ln.
The event honors the blessings of family,
friends and community. It is done as a token
of appreciation for those who support One
Voice and its mission.
The chorus has also released its calendar for the 2009-2010 season, culminating
GREENSBORO — Lennie Gerber and
Pearl Berlin are currently gracing billboards
throughout the city in the latest Triad Equality
Alliance (TEA) campaign.
TEA’s objective is to showcase through
photography that members of the LGBT community are just like everyone else.
Gerber and Berlin will be on hand at the
Equality NC Gala. They will be providing a
special presentation.
To see the billboard, visit www.triad
equality.org/waited/LP.htm.
GGF supports training program
GREENSBORO — On Oct. 15, the Guilford
Green Foundation (GGF) presented Equality
NC Foundation (ENCF) with a grant at the
group’s annual granting ceremony. The $3,075
grant will support ENCF’s work to to identify
and train a group of talented young activists
in the Triad area.
“Guilford Green Foundation has long been
an important community partner in our
work,” said Ian Palmquist, ENCF’s executive
director.“We are honored to be among the
recipients of this year’s grants.”
See a complete list of recipients online at
www.q-notes.com.
For more information, visit
www.ggfnc.org.
WESTERN
Youth fundraiser held
ASHEVILLE — A Halloween fundraiser
for a local LGBT youth service and support
organization was held on Oct. 30.
The “Fashion Bites Back” runway show featured Halloween-inspired fashions and costumes.A few fabulously-dressed monsters
even made an appearance.All proceeds from
the event supported Youth Outright, which
offers support to LGBT youth from Asheville
and surrounding areas in Western North
Carolina. The group holds support meetings
for youth every Friday evening.
“Youth come from all of the WNC counties, and they come to this place to be able to
talk about issues,” Youth Outright board
chair Stephen Dermargosian told The
Asheville Citizen-Times.
Youth Outright has been active in several
forms since 2006. They received their own
non-profit status this year. The fundraising
event was just one of many meant to help the
organization get on its feet and continue to
provide much needed services to youth.
Festival attracts hundreds
ASHEVILLE — After a near loss of
Asheville's hometown Pride festival in 2008,new
organizers banded together to present a new and
improved Blue Ridge Pride Festival in downtown's Martin Luther King,Jr.Park on the weekend of National Coming Out Day in October.
Several hundred Asheville and Western
North Carolina community members came
out to watch several musical entertainers,
shop and peruse vendor booths and community resources, and connect for community
building and empowerment.
The reinvented festival was held on Oct.
10, a day prior to National Coming Out Day
and the national Equality march in
Washington, D.C.
Festival chair Amy Huntsman told The
Asheville Citizen-Times that the goal of the
event was to "cross-pollinate" the community
and to bring folks together.
“Asheville is this weird pocket of acceptance, but because Asheville has this attitude,
people get complacent,” she told the daily
paper.“Everybody has their little projects here
and there, but for a town that's so accepting,
there's not really a sense of community.” Q
info: Announce your community event in NC News Notes.
email: editor@q-notes.com.
11
L E G A L
City bans performer over
anti-gay lyrics
Song tells ‘stupid gays and queers’ to
‘go somewhere else’
REIDSVILLE, N.C. — City officials have
banned future performances by a popular
regional Country band after the group sang an
anti-gay rendition of a
classic Merle Haggard
song at a local festival.
Reidsville officials
hired Matt Boswell and
the Hillbilly Blues
Band to sing at their
fall festival, held at
Market Square in the
city’s downtown area
on Saturday, Oct. 10.
Local news station
WGSR 47 broadcast
the event live.
In his rendition of
Haggard’s “Are the Good
Times Really Over for
Good?”, Boswell sang,
“Well you’ll never take
my guns, and I’ll pray anywhere that I
please./My daddy always told me, if you were
able, and didn’t work then you don’t eat./All
you Wall Street bankers, as far as I’m concerned, you can all go to Hell./And you can’t
get married, you stupid gays and queers, so
why don’t you go somewhere else?”
A viewer later emailed the station asking
that anti-gay lyrics be stripped from future
broadcasts.
Reidsville City Manager Kelly Almond told
Q-Notes the language used by Boswell was
“tasteless.”
“It was absolutely unacceptable and certainly unacceptable at a city-owned venue and
city-sponsored event,” he said.
Almond also said the employees in charge
of booking public events have been “instructed not to book [Boswell] again,” with similar
thoughts echoed in an email to WGSR 47:“I
can assure everyone involved that, if this language was used, this person, or anyone representing him, will not play another city event.
Market Square, and indeed all city venues, are
places meant to bring people together, not
12
divide them.We certainly support tasteful,
patriotic acts.We also have to respect everyone’s Free Speech rights. However, we don’t
have to pay for it or include it in a city sponsored event, and we will not.”
Two city council members told
Greensboro’s News & Record they support
Almond’s decision.
Photo from Boswell’s MySpace profile.
“If he (Boswell) wants to stand on the
street corner and say that, that’s one thing,”
Councilman W. Clark Turner told the daily
paper.“But to say it in a city-sponsored event
— that is altogether a different thing.”
Councilwoman Joan Zdanski said she
would have been even more upset if Almond
had known about the situation and taken
no action.
“If he became aware of that and didn’t do
something, then I would say that would be a
problem,” Councilwoman Joan Zdanski said.
Boswell is a frequent performer at several
Piedmont-area event venues and clubs
stretching from southwest Virginia to
Greensboro, N.C. Q-Notes was unable to find
contact information for Boswell and his agent
did not return calls seeking comment.
The City of Reidsville is located north
of Greensboro in Rockingham County and
has less than 15,000 residents. The city
does not include sexual orientation or gender-identity in its non-discrimination policy for city employees. Q
page 16
Chef’s Special
The cast of ‘Eating Out 3’ delivers the dish on their riotous new film
by Mikey Rox . Contributing Writer
Daniel Skelton: I was actually approached
ended up working out that I got the role. I
hree newcomers — Daniel Skelton,
by a casting director at a restaurant, so it
had always wanted to play a straight guy
Michael E.R. Walker and Chris
was kind of just a matter of luck being on
in a film. Growing up Mormon and gay, I
Salvatore — make their feature film
my side that day. The role initially
feel like I’ve been researching this role my
debut in “Eating Out: All You Can Eat,” the
intrigued me because the character of
entire life, as I’ve tried to cover up my
third installment in the raunchy rom-com
Casey is so relatable and honest that I
homosexuality. I was even engaged twice
franchise from creator Q. Allan Brocka.
think a lot of guys will find they have
to girls before coming out. I’m proud of
Like its predecessors, “EO3” finds an
something in common with him. So, I
the work I did on this film and I think that
unlucky-at-love newbie pining for the
suppose just the way the character was
I pulled off the whole straight thing.
affection of the series’ resident hunk
who has his sights set on the
maybe-gay hottie who gets
caught in the middle of a
quirky — and often unsanitary — love quadrangle.
Confused yet? So are they.
But while the movie has
plenty to offer in the way of
cheap laughs (from Leslie
Jordan and Mink Stole, no
less) and a scantily clad climax, it’s these three homigos
— all gay and friends in real
life — who take this otherwise
unseasoned sequel from dinner to dessert.
In a recent interview,
Skelton, Walker and Salvatore
open wide about their first time
(on screen), love and sex on and
off set, disrobing for the camera,
and how showing off their soonto-be-famous nether regions could
affect their budding careers — and
their parents. Order’s up!
Chris, let’s start with you. This is
your second film, the first being
the acclaimed short “Misplaced.”
Coincidentally, in both
“Misplaced” and “Eating Out 3,”
you play characters who troll online
for sex. How much research went
into preparing for these roles?
Chris Salvatore: That is a coincidence, isn’t
it. I was never into trolling online for sex,
if that’s what you mean by “research,”
but I did meet a few of my ex-boyfriends
on the internet. I think it’s a lot easier for
gays to meet online. I even met Michael
on MySpace. It’s very life imitating art, or,
in this instance, the other way around.
Daniel and Michael — you’re newcomers as well. “Eating Out 3” is
the first film for both of you. What
was the audition process like, what
intrigued you about the role you
accepted and how do you feel
about your very first on-screen performance?
Michael E.R. Walker, Daniel Skelton and Chris Salvatore (l-r) star in “Eating Out: All
Michael E.R. Walker: I was the last actor
You Can Eat,” the third installment from Q. Allan Brocka.
to audition for “Eating Out.” I know
they had a few actors in mind, but it just Photo Credit: Ariztical Entertainment
T
next issue
November 14, 2009
written was enough to get me excited to
flesh him out. I feel good about what
we’ve created.
So, we’re all Facebook friends now.
And, I’m excited that you’ve each
allowed me to be part of your growing online communities of people
you don’t actually know. It seems,
however, that all three of you are
real-life friends. Were you friends
before or after “Eating Out 3” came
along?
CS: I met Michael a year-and-a-half ago
in NYC. We dated for six months, then
he moved to Los Angeles. I moved out
to L.A. a few months ago and we reconnected through this film. Daniel and I
became really close friends during filming. He is such a little comedian. Now
we are all good friends and hang out all
the time!
DS: We all became really close during filming — I hang out with those two on a
pretty regular basis and I’m so happy
to have made such good friends.
Then there is Rebekah Kochan,
who I’m obsessed with. She is
so hilarious on and off screen.
Everyone in the cast was really
easy to get along with.
Michael and Chris — I
stalked you for a few
minutes on your profiles — you know, for
research — and I
noticed a suspicious
amount of pictures of
you two scantily clad
and very close together. Spill it — are you
bumping uglies?
MW: Chris and I are dating.
CS: [Laughs] Isn’t it obvious?
But, yes, I’m smitten by
Michael Walker.
As luck would have it, you
two have been officially
inducted into the “Eating Out”
hall of fame — or shame,
whichever you prefer. And I think
you know what I’m talking about
here. First, “Desperate
Housewives” hottie Ryan Carnes,
then Marco Dapper. How does it
feel to be among this group of finelookin’ actors who have bared it all
in the name of raunchy comedy?
CS: Baring it all in a comedy is the way to
go, in my opinion! That way if the audience laughs, you can blame it on the jokes.
see Cast on 14
Queer Cuising
Transcending Gender
Winter travel
Exploring the ‘T’ in LGBT
www.q-notes.com/qliving • QNotes
Q - L I V I N G
Cast delivers dish on new film
from page 13
You’re all gay, which is great, but
MW: It’s the one thing about the movie I
there’s always talk in the industry
didn’t really want to do. But it’s over and
that openly gay actors have a hard
as soon as all my friends have seen the
time finding work. What’s your take
movie and I’ve moved past it, I’ll be over
on that? Do you think it’s true, or
it. But I’m still a little unnerved by this…
are people making this stuff up?
Marco once told me that his, um,
CS: This is a hard question. I think there are
“parts” were, let’s say, modified for
so many people with opinions about this
the film. It turns out that he’s a
topic who are not educated enough to form
shaver — down there — and hair and
one. I hear people say to me all the time the
makeup had to glue little curlies
same exact thing, that it is hard to find work
back on. Were there any touch-ups
if you’re out. But, what they don’t realize is I
for you guys?
am happy being who I am. I don’t want to
CS: I tried to get Lex the makeup girl to
hide that from the world. The closeted peopaint sexy abs on me. But, no, there
ple who do, yeah, maybe they are famous
weren’t any touch-ups done.
actors who are getting work left and right,
MW: No.
DS: Not for me, no.
You know that because of
this film, gays across the
world will be combining
your names and the word
“naked” in a online search,
right? How do you feel
about being Googled then
oogled?
CS: I feel okay with that. Being
naked isn’t all that bad. If they
were Googling a sex tape, that
may be a little embarrassing.
MW: It’s a natural part of this
process, but I’m actually a very
private and monogamous person, so I’m still learning how to
be comfortable with this.
DS: [Laughs] Well, I wasn’t actually naked in the movie. So, they
won’t come up with any results.
Considering that this is the
first major project for you
three, I’m sure your parents
want to see the work you’ve
done. Will you let the family
watch? Will you watch it
with them? And, if you do
watch it with them, can I sit
in and enjoy the awkward
silences?
CS: [Laughs] I wouldn’t mind
Daniel Skelton, Michael E.R. Walker and
watching the movie with my
Chris Salvatore star in “Eating Out: All You
parents. It’s a really funny movie
Can Eat,” the third installment from
with a great message at the end.
Q. Allan Brocka.
My mom will probably cry ’cause
Photo
Credit:
Ariztical
Entertainment
the ending is so touching.
but I bet they are living an internal hell. I
MW: My parents do not know about this
don’t mean to get all sappy and dark, but if
project and I don’t think they ever will.
you had to ask yourself on your death bed
They’re 60, Mormon and live in Utah.
— “Am I proud and happy of the life I led?”
DS: Of course. I love my family and they
think it looks very funny. I might insist they
watch the edited-for-cable version though!
see next page >
14
Q - L I V I N G
continued from previous page
— what do you think the answer would be?
So, before people express their opinions to
gay men and women on being out in the
media and all the ‘negative’ effects it may
Photo Credit: Ariztical Entertainment
have on one person’s career, they should
think about how it may make someone feel
to have to lie about who they are. Just be
yourself, I say.
MW: It’s true to a certain extent, but it
shouldn’t be. I play a straight guy in this film
and I think I did the role justice. If straight
guys can play gay guys, why shouldn’t it be
perfectly all right the other way around? It’s
sad that it’s that way in the industry, but I
think it’s changing and will continue to
change as our community makes more and
more advances and progress with marriage
and mainstream culture.
DS: To be honest, I’m not concerned in
the slightest. I love acting, but there are so
many other things in the industry I’m
excited to get into, particularly screenwriting. That being said, I do think there is a
problem with sexuality in this industry and
I hope that films like this can help open
people’s minds and help the gay commu-
nity to continue making progress until the
issue is no more.
Were there any moments during
filming where you thought to yourself, “Hmm, maybe showing
the goods isn’t a good
career move?” Do you think
the nature of this film will
prevent you from getting
mainstream work?
CS: No, not at all. I think it
will help.
MW: As I said before, it was the
one thing about taking this role
and doing this movie that I didn’t want to do, but I knew that
this was an opportunity that I
couldn’t pass up. I think what’s
important in getting future work
is the performance.
DS: No goods were shown, so
no worries here.
What’s been the best part
of this journey so far?
CS: Working with a fantastic
group of actors and the crew.
Everyone got along so well.
Nobody had egos at all. It was
just a really great process.
MW: Reconnecting with Chris.
DS: The tremendous amount of
knowledge I’ve gained and the
amazing friendships.
Where do you go from
here?
CS: Definitely up! And I can
only thank all the people
involved in “Eating Out: All You
Can Eat,” especially the director,
Glenn Gaylord, for giving me this opportunity! I can’t wait to do more. Right now I
am recording my second album. One of
the songs will be featured in the film.
MW: I am going to wait until the film has
come out and then go hunting for a smaller agency and try to get work. I loved
being a part of this process and I can’t
imagine it being the first and last film I do.
I don’t think I’ll be doing any more full
frontals any time soon, but I would love to
keep going.
DS: I have a couple of possible projects
that are still in talks and I’m finishing up a
script I’ve been working on over the last
year, so I’m looking forward to the possibilities that await. Q
— Mikey Rox is an award-winning
freelance journalist and the principal of
Paper Rox Scissors, a copywriting and creative consulting company in New York City.
Find him at www.paperroxscissors.com.
15
Q - L I V I N G
by J. Scott Thomas
Gay in the Army
[Ed. Note — In the summer, Q-Notes was
contacted by a gay North Carolinian who
wished to write about his experiences as a gay
man in military service. We wanted to share his
thoughts with readers to not only commemorate Veterans’ Day, but to raise awareness of the
trials and tribulations LGBT men and women
face as they serve our nation in silence and fear.
You will see J. Scott Thomas’ letters back home
spread about the next few issues as we receive
updates from the field.]
I am a soldier serving in the North
Carolina National Guard currently deployed
on active duty in Iraq. I hope that after this
summer time of Pride and celebration you
will think about what an historic and pivotal
time in our nation’s history we are witnessing.
This is a time America has chosen to give
change a chance. This is a time when we as a
community can gain ground in our struggle
for equal rights.
We are closer now than we have ever come
to being openly accepted to serve in the
armed forces of our country — to finally be
truthful about who we are and have our qualities be recognized openly. It is a fact that full
acceptance of a minority in society has never
been achieved in this country without first
being accepted as equal in/by our military,
whether grudgingly or otherwise.
Things are changing in our military with a
16
new generation, within and outside the
services. I would like very much to write to
y’all during my deployment; about being
in the military, those I serve with, the
importance of equality in the military and
its overall importance in the fight for
equality and full acceptance.We are
Carolinians; we are your family, friends, and
neighbors. Our significance as soldiers in the
U.S.Army National Guard, now activated, has
its impact not only on you as our community
and state but on the rest of the country.
There are a few of us that we know about
and we are lucky to have found each other; the
internet can be a good thing. Every once and
awhile, you just need to let your hair down, be
yourself and, luckily, we are here for one
another. It is ridiculous, however, that we have
to hide it.We are all in combat arms branches
and all hold important positions.We are officers, translators, intelligence team members,
communication specialists, electronic warfare
officers, technician, mechanics, gunners, drivers and the list goes on.All are crucial to our
unit yet we must hide who we are while we listen to our counterparts talk about their loved
ones and can be honest about who they are.
Bill Clinton came the closest to recognizing
us as equals, but his policy back fired. Our
new commander-in-chief, Barack Obama, has
just renewed his vow to get rid of “Don’t Ask,
Don’t Tell” and I have been encouraged by the
Human Rights Campaign’s renewed support of
the movement to repeal the ban.
We have waited 13 years for this moment.
We have been told to be patient, and we can
be, but why should we have to wait? I guaran-
tee you that once we are allowed to serve
openly all other barriers will begin to fall, just
look at our history. It is important that our
community’s leaders recognize
this fact.We should not be discouraged by this seemingly
small promise; rather we should
be ecstatic and encourage its
passage as soon as possible.
Irish Catholics, Latinos, and
other immigrants gained acceptance after demonstrating their
patriotism, courage, and fortitude while under fire. New immigrants still to this day can obtain
their citizenship by serving in the
armed forces. Likewise,AfricanAmericans began winning their
battle for civil rights once they
were fully integrated in the military.While the position of
women is still continually progressing in the military, the
women’s rights movement was
bolstered by the integration of
women into the military.
The point is, diversity is good and it starts
with and in the military.
As we have seen in polls, the younger generations of our country recognize the
hypocrisy. They are the “Will & Grace” generations that grew up, thanks to all the work of
the LGBT leaders of the past, with openly gay
kids in school and don’t see a problem in serving alongside gay people in the military.
Studies have unequivocally and definitively
now reported that there is no threat to unit
cohesion from “out” members of the military.
Through the winter and into the new year, I
hope you enjoy reading my articles and will
Photo Credit: U.S. Army
realize how important the total repeal of “Don’t
Ask, Don’t Tell” is to our community’s overall
fight for equality.We miss y’all back home,
especially the boys of Charleston and
Wilmington, the queens of Columbia and
Charlotte.We miss the nights in Greenville,
Asheville, Greensboro and Raleigh, the mountains.We miss the days at the beach and on the
lake and the cool Carolina evening breeze. Q
— Your Soldier, J. Scott Thomas
17
Q - L I V I N G
General Gayety
by Leslie Robinson . Contributing Writer
Soccer snub
A soccer team in suburban Paris doesn’t
play well with others.
The Creteil Bebel club refused to play a
match against a gay club called Paris Foot Gay.
The gay team said it received an email stating,
“Sorry, but because of the name of your team
and in keeping with the principles of the
team, which is a team of practicing Muslims,
we cannot play against you.”
Further: “Our convictions are stronger
than a game of football. Sorry to have
informed you so late.”
Was the Muslim team so late in cancelling
the match because the players were arguing
among themselves what to do? Are they of one
mind now? I hope not. I hope present conversation goes something like this:
Goalkeeper: We stood up for our principles.
Midfielder: At least it gave your hamstring
more time to heal.
Goalkeeper: I’m proud of us.We served Allah
on earth.
Midfielder: Why couldn’t we just have beaten
them? Wouldn’t that prove Allah is great?
Goalkeeper: We might have lost.
Midfielder: Ah.
Goalkeeper: Better not to take chances. Better
for us, better for Allah.
Midfielder: Don’t want to lose to a bunch of
men-women.
Goalkeeper: Right. Besides, they had an
advantage.
Midfielder: What’s that?
Goalkeeper: None of us would’ve wanted to
touch them. Hard to play football that way.
Midfielder: Oh.
Goalkeeper: They probably would’ve tried to
touch us every chance they got. Nasty people.
Midfielder: Do you think every gay person is
bad?
Goalkeeper: Of course. They break the holy
laws. Every one of them
should get a red card and
be kicked out of the
game of life.
Midfielder: Kill them?
Goalkeeper: Well, maybe
just a concentration camp.
Allah is merciful.
Midfielder: French law doesn’t work like that.
Goalkeeper: That’s the problem! No morals in
this country! We have to fight even harder to
uphold our standards. Plus they treat us like
dogs. Nice to stick it to them in their Crème
Brûlée.
Midfielder: You love Crème Brûlée.
Goalkeeper: Yes, along with Pot de Crème,
Crêpe Suzette and even Bûche de Noël. But,
you get my point. Here’s a chance to tell the
French to go jump in the Seine. If they want to
defend their faggot countrymen, make a big
deal out of this, that’s their problem.
Midfielder: What do you think will happen
with the other team’s protest to the league?
Goalkeeper: Maybe a slap on the wrist. Maybe
they’ll tell us we have to play them.We won’t
do it. Even if we’re thrown out of the league.
Midfielder: And if we’ve broken French law?
Goalkeeper: It was a pleasure.
Midfielder: You stand firmer than the Eiffel
Tower.
Goalkeeper: Thank you.
Midfielder: I’d rather give up breathing than
football.
Goalkeeper: To be true to Allah, we must make
sacrifices.
Midfielder: I’m not sure this one is necessary.
I’ve read about the other team. They aren’t
entirely gay. They have straight players. They
have blacks, North Africans, different religions. I’m thinking of asking if they need a
midfielder.
Goalkeeper: I cannot believe it.
Midfielder: Neither can I. I hope Allah understands I love to play.And, when it comes to
hating people, I’m not as firm as the Eiffel
Tower. I’m more like a Béarnaise sauce. Q
info: LesRobinsn@aol.com . www.GeneralGayety.com
On Being a Gay Parent
will be forever
“marked”as the
child of a gay dad.
by Brett Webb-Mitchell . Contributing Writer
While I told them I
was gay when they
were very young,
One of my primary concerns when I began
without doubt
the process of separating from the person I
they’ve discovered they have the capacity to
was married to and moving out was the wellhandle stark differences from other families in
being of our two children. The same was true
our so-called liberal community of Carrboro;
for their mom: we were both concerned on
they’ve survived, if not at times thrived, in the
how they would not only adjust to our divorce,
freedom to crack gay jokes in our household
but also how they would handle my being out
that would get them in trouble in school; and
and gay, let alone being in a relationship with a
I’ve watched as they’ve become each other’s soul
significant person.While I could be someone
mate as they share the same dad in common
they could still draw support from and come to
who has risen above the tyranny of American
with any question under the sun, I could not
normality of what it means to be “family.”
see into their future and find out how they
In other words, the children are doing well.
would handle the reality of being a child of a
I can make this claim after attending the
dad who is gay — especially in a Southern
board meeting of COLAGE, a national network
context. They would simply have to adjust and
of offspring, young and old, whose parents
adapt internally and personally to my being
happen to be lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgengay, as well as being a child — a son, a daughder or queer expressing. Some even go by the
ter — of a dad who is gay and in a significant
name “COLAGER” to identify themselves as
relationship. This brought me no succor.
being a child of someone who is LGBTQ. The
While I have written and talked about comadolescent and adult children I met there were
ing out from the perspective of the out gay paramazing, each with his or her own story, coment, I am also aware that my family is now typeing from different parts of the country, in
see Gay on 23
cast by some as a “gay family”and my children
The children are doing well
18
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19
Q - L I V I N G
Tell Trinity
by Trinity . Contributing Writer
How to ‘move out’ right
the first time
Dearest Trinity,
I’m moving out from a very dysfunctional
relationship and there’s lots of drama. That’s why
I’m leaving. But, I want to move out with the
least amount of drama. Help?
Moving Drama, Austin, Texas
Dearest Moving Drama,
When it comes to “moving out,” there’s
always drama and trauma. That’s why you
must do it right the first time by getting all the
help you need from the start, not when it’s too
late.You must strategically plan your transition and you may even want a lawyer’s advice.
Then, darling, once you’re out and have
destroyed everything that reminds you of him
or her, take a wonderful singles vacation
somewhere intoxicating.
Hey Trinity,
My girlfriend freaks out and lectures me on
my problem with being late. She’s obsessive about
it. I try to be on time, but it’s not always possible.
How can I win with her?
Late Again, Columbus, Ohio
Hey Late Again,
Being late naturally makes people upset,
especially if you do it often. It also hints to
other inconsistencies you may have that could
add to your girlfriend’s frustrations.Yes, she
should learn to love you while hating your lack
20
of integrity (did I say that?). Now, I
know you want me to say,“fix her,” but
when it comes to lateness it’s you that’s
missing the train? Sorry, pumpkin, but
learn to be on time. (Practice some
punctualilty by reading my cartoon
right now for some timely advice.)
well as make a mental note that this may
just be a passing fling. And, lastly, you
should stay in the moment, sweetie, while
having wild, exciting and exhausting sex,
especially with our soldiers.
Dearest Trinity,
My roommate is on my case to “clean up”
myself, especially when I go out on a date. He
says,“Men have to make themselves attractive
too!” Shouldn’t someone be attracted to me for
who I am naturally?
Naturally Handsome, Trenton, N.J.
Dearest Naturally Handsome,
Of course, you should be yourself, but why
not be your best self, your groomed self, your
clean self. If women spend hours at the beauty
parlor, men should spend some time too. So,
honey, here are:
Trinity’s Preparatory Tips For
Men Just Before Going Out
Or On A Date
Dear Trinity,
I’ve been dating and sleeping with a military
man. But, recently, I found out he’s a priest and
aren’t priests supposed to be celibate. Should I be
worried?
Celibate Date, Las Vegas, Nev.
Dear Celibate Date,
You should always be aware of dishonesty and careful of men in the military who
leave on “foreign affairs.” However, you
should also find out if he’s a non-celibate
priest like Episcopalian or Protestant, as
1. Clipping or pulling out your (visual) nose
hairs makes looking at you less like looking at a zoo animal.
2. Trimming your eyebrows (especially the
curly, runaway ones) means you’ll never
force someone to remember Einstein or
Mr. Hyde.
3. Shaving the hair off the back of your neck
assures you’ll look younger and less prehistoric.
4. Getting rid of the hairs sprouting from
your ears says,“I have a job. I have a mirror.And, I won’t eat you!”
5. Brushing and flossing before you go out
keeps people from covering their mouth
while talking to you.
6. Styling your hair or trimming your baldhead gives the idea that you’re not a lonely,
introverted, unabomber.
7. Dyeing the gray, especially from your
beard, takes an immediate 10 years off
your life and your sexual history.
8. Manicures are not only healthy, but a sign
of class.
9. Doing a few pre-date exercises, like,
pushups, pull-ups, dips and curls, will give
you an immediate shape, cut and curve.
10. Lastly, dressing in plaids, strips and polka
dots, promises you’ll be hard to look at, yet
do well at avoiding enemy attacks! Q
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity
was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly
radio drama, and now performs globally.
info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com
Tell Trinity, P.O. Box 23861 . Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33307
Sponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild
800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org
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Q - L I V I N G
Out in the Stars
by Charlene Lichtenstein
Oct. 31-Nov. 13
November creates ruckus and rampage, thanks to
retrograde Uranus trine Venus and eventually
square Sun and Mercury. Whew! And, not a
moment too soon.We have become too sedate and
self satisfied. Now is the time for change in whatever shape or form.Don’t be a turkey — gobble up
the opportunities that will now abound.
SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) Your winning ways get
you invitations to the top parties, but the social
frenzy may wind up being too much,too fast.Even
queer Scorps who tend to have good common
sense can over-extend, over-do and over-everything now. Of course, someone might say that this
is all prep work for the holidays. If so, pace yourself so you can go the distance by New Years.
SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) There is someone
working behind the scenes who is trying to help
you. Try not to thwart their efforts by dredging up
the past and eyeing impossible projects and goals.
Gay Archers can enjoy November if they allow
themselves a little down time and a redirection of
their attention to domestic tasks. But, don’t worry
— that does not necessarily mean doing laundry.
CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Consider friendships to be just another political situation to be
navigated this November. Friends want the honest truth — or do they? Something that you say,
in all honesty, may not be what they want or need
to hear. Make a sharp appraisal of any platonic
situation and see if sugar will work better than
salt. I’m sure that you would want the same,
should the situation be reversed.
AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) Even if you think
everything is A-okay at work, you could face a
surprising upheaval now. Will your political fortunes change dramatically? Possibly. Will you be
able to benefit for any major changes? Perhaps, in
time. For now, spread your charm as thick as possible and massage the power elite carefully. Who
knows? Your next office could even have a door
and walls.
PISCES (02.20-03.20) Self promotion is sometimes difficult for you. November insures that you
garner some attention for yourself in extreme
ways.Can you control your message? Guppies now
make their entrance onto center stage in a range of
disguises. Who do you want to be? Whoever you
are, it will be a splashy surprise that makes headlines. So, avoid cellophane pants just in case.
ARIES (03.21-04.20) Expect the unexpected
in any happy jaunt, especially those that take
you far afield. Proud Rams feel like globetrotting, but may find that they stub their hoof at
every opportunity. That is okay, as long as you
avoid the deep potholes and bleak
. Contributing Writer alleys. You find that
it brings you in
touch with some very interesting folks. How
interesting, however, is up to you. Uh, oh.
TAURUS (04.21-05.21) The focus is on relationships, queer Bull.You are full of verve and almost
anxious for a deep connection. But, the result of
any carefree, heart-throbbing encounter cannot
be assured to last very long. As the month progresses, you might find that all that was, is now
spent. Brush it off and try another conquest. Just
be sure to pack some common sense this time.
GEMINI (05.22-06.21)You love where you work
— at least this month.And maybe that is because
work is in turmoil and there is a bit of a revolutionary in you that loves to see the old order
upended.Be prepared for anything in your career.
And, be warned — by the end of the month the
skeletons not only emerge from your closet, but
also dance. Join in the jig.
CANCER (06.22-07.23) You find love and romance in the strangest places, which means you
will have to get out of your shell and make yourself
available for viewing.Eat drink and be very merry.
And, yet, before you know it, all those deferred job
tasks rear their ugly heads and tie you to the office.
Don’t let too many things stagnate. Try not to get
bogged down during high party season.
LEO (07.24-08.23) Make your home a love nest
and see who flies by and settles in. Proud Lions
have more than their fair share of sexual opportunities, but will need to be discerning about
whom they will bring home to meet mother. In a
couple of weeks you find that you have so many
enticing invitations that your sphere of influence
expands and stretches. See if your reach exceeds
your grasp.
VIRGO (08.24-09.23) Queer Virgins might upset their carefully balanced life by taking a foolish
risk in an established relationship. What you
think will be the end result,may not happen at all.
Surprises are the only constant now. Improve
your chances of success by opening the lines of
communication. You don’t have to be honest, just
approachable. Then sell ’em what you can.
LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Keep your eye on the job
with the ultimate goal of saving anything and
everything you make. Money makes the world go
around for you, especially if you invest or save it.
Too soon your usual bad spending habits will win
out over your new sensible frugality. But for now,
get through the craziness at work by keeping your
head down and your pockets full. Q
© 2009 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment.
info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings,
horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide
To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is
available at bookstores and major booksites.
21
Q - L I V I N G
Out and About . compiled by Q-Notes staff
Events and happenings across the Carolinas
Oct. 31 • Boone
Masquerade
High Country Pride presents Masquerade, a Halloween
dance and fundraiser for Boone’s LGBT Pride organization and AIDS service organization ALFA. Dancing and
drinks, with optional dinner buffet. Costumes encouraged. Broyhill Inn Ballroom, 775 Bodenheimer Dr. 9
p.m.-1 a.m. $10. www.highcountrypride.org .
Oct. 31 • Winston-Salem
Dixie Debutante Ball
Debutante Balls have long played an important role in
genteel Southern culture. This year’s Dixie Deb Ball
will benefit AIDS Care Service. Each debutante will be
presented to society along with their life histories and
worldly accomplishments. Some will perform (or try
to perform).VJ Barry Browder from Fort Lauderdale’s
George’s Alibi provides non-stop video disco music to
liven up the dance floor. Dancing and merriment with
a VJ until the wee hours of the night. It’s Halloween —
dress festive! A $30 admission includes heavy hors d’
oeuvres. Cash bar available. Space is limited, so
reserve tickets in advance. For more information, visit
www.aidscareservice.org.
Nov. 2 • Rock Hill
When the gays move in
A presentation by Joe Bertolino and Bil Leipold. Joe and
Bil explore the realities and human dimensions of living in a world of heterosexual privilege. Drawing from
their own lives, their experiences as fraternity men and
student affairs professionals, their family experiences,
and the dynamics of their own relationship, Joe & Bil
present this difficult topic in a non-threatening, humorous way. Plowden Auditorium,Winthrop University,
Oakland Ave. 8 p.m. $5/Winthrop students, $10/general
public. www.winthrop.edu/studentaffairs/dsu.
Nov. 3
General Election
Many municipalities will hold general elections this
year. Be sure to register to vote and head out to the
polls on Nov. 3.Visit www.sboe.state.nc.us to check
your current voter registration and polling location.
Nov. 6 • Charlotte
Doubting Thomas
Hartigan’s Irish Pub hosts Doubting Thomas with
Lindy Dobbins opening. Hartigan’s, 601 S. Cedar St.
9 p.m.-2 a.m. $10 cover. 704-347-1841.
Nov. 7 • Spartanburg
Cleaning out the closet
Upstate Pride will host a group rummage and bake
sale, with proceeds benefiting next year’s Pride festival. Items can be donated to the sale.A location has
yet to be determined. For more information, stay
tuned to Q-Notes or call 864-612-0747 or email
publicrelations@upstatepridesc.org.
Nov. 7 • Raleigh
Gloria Steinam
NARAL Pro-Choice NC presents Gloria Steinem for a
special speaking engagement. Steinem has spent her
more than 40-year career highlighting and advocating
for the rights of women. Unitarian Universalist
Fellowship of Raleigh, 3313 Wade Ave. 12:30 p.m.
Tickets $20-$50. (This is a barrier-free event.) Buy
tickets, register attendance and get more information
at www.ProChoiceNC.org.
Nov. 13-15 • Columbia
Culture and arts festival
QMocha Magazine presents CAFE 2009 (Cultural Arts
Festival & Expo). The first of its kind, the weekendlong CAFE 2009 highlights the various facets of Urban
LGBT culture and art from literary to dance, drama to
cabaret. The weekend kicks off with "Cabaret at
CAFE," a drag show (kings & queens) at The Cabaret.
For more information and to purchase tickets visit
www.qmocha.com.
Nov. 13-15 • Blowing Rock
Takeover at Blowing Rock
Takeover Friday and friends head back to Blowing
22
Rock for a weekend of Appalachian Mountain fun. For
more information on weekend events and accommodations, visit www.takeoverfriday.com or their
Facebook event page at www.facebook.com/
event.php?eid=291348455013.
Nov. 13 • Greensboro
Youth Suicide Prevention
The Wellness Center at the University of North CarolinaGreensboro presents a training session on LGBT youth
suicide prevention. This all-day workshop will teach risk
awareness, intervention strategies and more. For more
information, email Jeanne_Irwin-Olson@uncg.edu.
Naughty or Nice Bingo
Guilford Green Foundation presents another of its
great Green Queen Bingo shows in downtown
Greensboro. The Empire Room, 203 S. Elm St. 6 p.m.
$10/students and military, $15/general admission.
www.ggfnc.org.
ENC Conference and Gala
Equality North Carolina will hold its third annual
statewide conference and gala in Greensboro. Obama
Administration official Brian Bond will keynote. State
Sen. Julia Boseman (D-New Hanover) will receive this
year’s Leadership Award. Registrations for both the
conference at UNC-Greensboro and the evening gala
at the downtown Empire Room are now open. For
more information and to register for the conference or
gala, visit www.equalitync.org.
Film screening
The Human Rights Campaign and Guilford Green
Foundation present a special screening of “For the
Bible Tells Me So,” a documentary exploring faith
and religion and homosexuality. The film profiles
Episcopal Bishop Gene Robinson, former House
Majority Leader Richard Gephardt and family,
North Carolina's Rev. Jimmy Creech and others. The
Broach Theatre, 520 S. Elm St. 4 p.m. $5 requested
donation. www.ggfnc.org. www.hrc.org.
Trans Rememberance
The Charlotte Gender Alliance presents a recognition
of the Transgender Day of Remembrance. Several
speakers will talk about the purpose of remembrance
and the challenges faced by the transgender community, as those present gather to remember transgender
people lost to anti-trans hate and prejudice. Lesbian &
Gay Community Center of Charlotte, 820 Hamilton
St., Suite B-11. 6:30 p.m. Free. www.charlottegender
alliance.info. www.gaycharlotte.com.
Shelita Goes to Hollywood
The fabulous Shelita and RAIN (Regional AIDS
Interfaith Network) team up to present this fall's
Charlotte Gay Bingo. Grady Cole Center, 310 N. Kings
Dr. 7:30 p.m. $25. Tickets can be bought at Paper
Skyscraper,White Rabbit or RAIN offices.
www.gaybingocharlotte.org.
Nov. 21 • Cullowhee
Equality festival
Western Carolina University's UNITY presents Fight
for Equal Rights 2009, a festival celebrating and supporting the continuation of equality and civil rights
including women’s rights and LGBT rights. For more
information, contact the group at unity@wcu.edu or
through their Facebook page at www.facebook.com/
group.php?gid=34606131271. Q
info: Announce your community event in Out & About.
email: outandabout@q-notes.com.
Submit your events online
You can submit your event listings online.Visit
www.q-notes.com/qguide/events/submit/ and fill out
the form and your event will appear in our event listings online and in print! It really is that easy!
Q - L I V I N G
Drag Rag
by Miss Della . Contributing Writer
What a great pageant time
Greetings and salutations, kids! Welcome
back to my contribution to the wonderful
world of female impersonation pageantry.We
have new national titleholders hither and yon
and a few new on the local levels, too. I was
able to attend two very exciting contests
recently that I’ll be able to speak about, as well
as others that I’ve rounded up “the tea” on.
First things first — we have a new Miss NC
America.Hooray! It was held at the Scorpio.All
kinds of dignitaries were in town,from former
Misses America to former Misses NC.Victoria
“Porkchop”Parker (or the Chopstein,as
Carmella Marcella Garcia would call her) was
giving it all up.It was quite a function,with the
likes of Rachael Erikks and Maya Montana judging.Catia Lee Love emceed.Tiffany Bonet was in
the house as was Jeff/Kerri Nichols.Our former
Miss NC Sharde’Ross also judged.Sharde’is on
her way back to Miss Gay U.S.ofA.Classic.Throw
in the likes of Miss D.Meaner,Devida,Brandy
Alexander (celebrating 43 years in the industry),
Melissa Montgomery,Jamie Monroe,Kristin
Collins (on her 10th anniversary) and Blair
Williams.I’m sure I’ve missed someone,too.I’ll
make corrections the next time once they have
had the chance to read this Rag.One day,my
dream will come true and they’ll get Stella Starr
back this way,but I’ll shush for now.
The Top 6 included Starla DaVinci (who won
the Toni Lenoir Prelim Talent Award); Emery
Starr (who won On-stage and Gown); Detra
Panucci (who won Solo Talent); Tracey Stephens
Gay Parent
(who won Overall Interview);
Aqua St.Mark; and Cherries
Jubilee.Vanessa Cottrell won the
Brandy Alexander Horizon
Award.Melissa Montgomery was
awarded the Miss NC Hall of
Fame that honors the late Rick
Wildes (former promoter of Miss NCA and
owner of Scorpio) for contributions to the art of
F.I.Melissa was the first Miss NC to reign over
city/area prelims.Best City Prelim went to Mike
Travis of Legends.Jessica Reins Starr won the
Tracy Morgan Best Non-Finalist Award and reenacted her talent from the Broadway musical
“The Drowsy Chaperone”that night.
There were a few contestants that qualified
since my last Rag that Id love to recognize —
Nairobi represented Miss Triad and actually
won the Erica Van Cort Congeniality Award.
Gobriel Brooks competed as Miss Capital City.
Tracey Stephens won Miss Queen City with RU
Briana Davis.Aqua St. Mark won Miss
Metrolina with Coco Chanel as her RU.As you
all know by now, Detra Panucci won Miss NC,
and Tracey Stephens was her RU. They are off
to St. Louis to compete at Miss Gay America as
this Q-Notes hits the stands! They will be competing alongside Miss Mid-Atlantic Kristina
Kelly, Miss Heartland Anastacia Beaverhausen
and RU Alyssa Edwards (saywhat?), Miss
Kansas Sparkel Iman, Miss FL (an NC gal herself) Monica Mohr and RU Jelitza Fearce, along
with many others, of course. Hats off to Victoria
DePaula on a great job as Miss Gay America
and to Piggy Parker for being a great Miss NC!
Before we go on to Miss U.S.ofA. at Large,
I’ll mention a few ladies who’ll be competing
in May at Miss U.S.ofA., like Shantell D’Marco
who won Miss TN, Jackie Roberts who won
Miss Wisconsin and Miss Iowa, Natasha Cass.
I’ve only been back from Indianapolis not
even a week as I write this and what a blast. I
got to room with my sister, the Mella Monster,
who was celebrating her 20th year as the first
Miss At-Large.Wow is a word that instantly
comes to mind. Ha! I cannot tell you how proud
I was of the outgoing Tajma Hall, who was relinquishing her title. I heard glowing accolade after
accolade about the consummate professional
she was for them this past year.What an exemplary titleholder she’d been. It makes me proud
of the old gal from Richmond Co., NC.Wonder
what’s up her sleeve next? You didn’t think she
wouldn’t compete again, did you? Surely you
jest! At any rate, our new Miss U.S.ofA. at Large
is April Reign of Las Vegas by way of Dayton,
OH. She brought those hot-ass dancers from her
Sin City prelim and turned the house out.A gorgeous Coco Vega down didn’t hurt. How lucky
for her that she’s Coco’s roommate, right? April’s
runners-up included the Lady Tahjee Iman,
Victoria Parker (who were both fabulous),
Alexis Nicole Whitney (an inspiration to all)
and another Piggy — Angelica Sanchez (a
Continental PLUS sister to Porkchop). Others in
the Top 12 included Jerica Knight, Mizery, Miss
NC Scarlett Dailey, Miss TX Samantha DeSante,
Mia Inez Adams,Alyssa Williams, and Adina
Ronee (who also won Most Beautiful). It was a
great contest, and here is wishing April Reign
my best for the upcoming year. Q
info: Drop me a line, OK? . TheTeaMissD@yahoo.com
from page 18
which all they had in common was something
unique about their parents: the courage to
raise their children in a loving environment, in
a relationship that held truth and honesty
highly. There were those folks who had two
dads, some who had two moms; others had a
parent who was transgender, male to female,
as well as those transgender parents who are
female to male. There were some with a parent
who is bisexual, once in a same-sex relationship but now in an opposite-sex relationship.
Of course, in the mix were intersecting identities of ethnicity, race, national heritage, gender,
class and disability, to name a few.And, some
of the COLAGERS were LGBTQI themselves,
while others were self-identifying as straight.
What I found unique about these offspring
who gathered at the board meeting is what I find
in my own children: they are doing well.Why are
they doing well? Because each person developed
survival,if not thriving,skills within a society
that is intolerant of differences,to say the least.
These skills make them a little bolder in being
who they are; they are more self-assured and
less brittle,come what may.They are quick to
question people’s assumptions about their families; and they have keen insights into another
person’s soul while being in touch with their
inner landscapes at their young age.
While I was scared to come out of my closet, partially in fear of what would happen
within the life of my children, I can now
report from the gay parenting front lines: the
children are doing well. Q
23
24

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Transcription

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