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Street Talk America
Free
September 2015
In God We Trust!
®
High School
Football
Schedules
Inside Pages 20-21
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Our Best Man
Peter took his new girlfriend to a football game. The
young couple found seats in the crowded stadium
and were watching the action. When the quarterback
entered the game, the boy said to his girlfriend, “Take
a good look at that fellow. I expect him to be our best
man next year.” His girlfriend snuggled closer to him
and said, “That’s the strangest way I ever heard of for
a guy to propose but, I accept!”
(with the purchase of drinks)
Our star player on the
cover of this month’s
Street Talk America
is Grayson Worley.
65 Items on Buffet Daily
Including Peach Cobbler &
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Ribeye Steak, Hamburger,
Shrimp, Catfish & Mullet Platters
Grayson is the son of Donnie
and Karla Worley of Graceville.
His proud grandparents are
Leaon and Ann Ward and
DB and Catherine Worley.
Grayson celebrated his first
birthday on August 21st.
Photo taken by photographer,
Nikki Elmore.
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(1 per paying adult)
Hours of Operation: Monday - Sunday 10a.m.- 8p.m.
Maria Andromidas-Owner
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2/ September 2015 Street Talk America
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of hearing
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The benefits of hearing instruments vary by type and degree of loss, noise environment, accuracy of hearing evaluation and proper fit. Discounts
off MSRP
www.beltone.com
Previous purchases excluded. For a limited
time. Cannot be combined with any other offers.
Among adults over 50. *Discount off MSRP. $XXX off single Beltone XX hearing aid. Cannot be combined with other offers, coupons or insurance plans. Previous purchases excluded. Participation may vary.
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†
Street Talk America
®
Washington, Holmes & Jackson Counties
www.streettalkamerica.com In God We Trust!
Crossroads Publishing LLC.
P.O. Box 170 • Vernon, FL 32462 • (850)-596-8685
Publisher: Kelley Ward, Streettalkamerica@live.com
Editors: Karen Mashburn and Edsol Jenkins
Sales Representative: Winfred ‘Wimpy’ Carnley
Contributing Writers:
Judy Jenkins
H.L. Brown
BN Heard
Angie Knight
Sherri Evans
Tim Patton
Dr. Charlie Hinson
Michael Kennedy, ARNP
Timothy Shumaker
Robert Birge
Cartoonist: Marvin Jenkins
Circulation & Distribution: 13,000 copies of STA are
printed each month. STA is free and available at high traffic
business locations in Washington, Holmes, Northern Walton and
Jackson counties. Copies are also available by subscription.
Street Talk America is an outreach ministry
devoted to uplift and entertain the reader. Any resemblance
contained within this publication to some one or some thing is
purely coincidental and not to bring harm or insult to anyone.
Information, stories, helpful hints, jokes, studies and all other
miscellaneous writings, drawings, and pictures are published
without malice, but with the intent to entertain, inspire or teach;
not to cause disillusionment or confusion to anyone; person, party
affiliation, company, denomination or other named or unnamed
entity. The writings contained within Street Talk do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or editor.
Street Talk America is not the author of many of the jokes
contained herein and claims no copyright privileges to those that
we didn’t author unless noted. The jokes contained herein are not
known to be copyrighted and are believed to be part of the public
domain. Every effort is made not to use copyrighted material
without the author’s consent. To report an improper use of a
copyrighted joke please contact Crossroads Publishing, LLC.,
and we will take the appropriate steps.
Street Talk America September 2015 /3
saw playing time. You could always pick them out
because they had the cleanest uniforms. When
some young freshman or sophomore would go
By: Tim Patton
out on the field I would call out not just his numPastor, Shiloh Baptist Church
ber or last name. I would call out his stats, class
Having grown up in the South, specifically,
status, full name, and number. When my youth
in Alabama, there is little doubt that I enjoy
minister
asked me why I did it for them and not
watching football. I confess to not being a big
the older kids, I replied, “That kid may never get to
pro football watcher but I really enjoy college
play
again this year except for these last two minutes.
ball, especially SEC. I didn’t take the opportunity
to play organized football as a kid, so I must also con- His momma needs to hear his name get called.” My
fess that I am a complete novice to positions and plays. favorite memory was the night I was looking over the
roster for the visiting team and came across a freshman
I know the basics of the game but I do not recognize
lineman who was 5’6” and weighed 295 lbs!! I called
specific plays as they are being executed nor can I
out to the other guys in the booth, “Hey, you’ve got to
tell you the right strategy for each play. Forgive me,
hear this kid’s stats!” As soon as I read them out, the
but I am content in my semi-ignorance. I confess that
clock-keeper said, “The game’s about to start. Felbecause I was completely shocked when I got asked
las, we need to pray.” We had never done that before,
to be the on-field announcer for our local high school
but when a preacher says “Let’s pray”, no one really
football team while I was serving a church in
questions it. We all bowed our heads and he began,
Alabama. I asked my friend who had approached me
“Lord, we thank you for the chance to be here tonight
if he was sure about his choice of asking me and he
assured me he was. After all, I would have a spotter to and watch these boys play. And Lord, we all just want
help me with players, numbers, yardage gained or lost to thank you right now that we don’t have to feed that
and the clock-keeper was also a fellow pastor who had boy!”
I asked my friend why he came to me, a nominal
a keen eye for the game. So, I agreed.
football
fan, to be the on-field announcer. I loved his
I had a ball (yes, pun intended)! Turns out the spotter
reply. He told me he always got a preacher when he
was my youth minister! He had been asked the same
could because they were not afraid of microphones and
time I had. So, we had three Baptist preachers in the
were good public speakers. He also wanted preachers
press box calling football. It sounds like the start of a
because he needed men who would not treat the game
bad joke. We got paid in free concessions. Confidenlike a religion and promote our team while being ugly
tially, I think that is why they asked us. What Baptist
preacher would turn down free food? My favorite time to the visiting team. He needed men who could do
an excellent job and also be men of grace so that the
was when the timing official assigned to us that night
school’s reputation in the district would be secured.
was also a bi-vocational Baptist pastor. We had the
He reminded me that our Lord taught us, “let your
holiest press box in the south.
light shine before others, so that they may see your
One of the things I loved to do was calling out
good works and give glory to your Father who is in
substitutions. When our team was ahead, our coach
Heaven”…even when calling football!
would put in some of the younger players who rarely
FOOTBALL, FUN,
& FAITH
1976 Shiloh Lane • Chipley, FL
South of I-10, Just off of 277
www.shilohbaptist.net
Sunday Morning
Wednesday Night
9:00 Connection Cafe (Coffee on Us!)*
6:00 Mid-Week Worship*
9:15 Small Group Bible Study*
Surround Sound Student Ministry
10:30 Worship Service**
Kid’s on Mission
*Nursery provided for new born to PK4
**Nursery & Children’s Church (up to 3rd grade)
4/ September 2015
Street Talk America
Trespassers
Three men were going on a hunting trip one day. They
came to a high fence and saw a sign that said, “No
Trespassing. All violators will be shot!” They ignored
the sign’s warning and climbed the fence anyway.
After they were over the fence (it was dark now), they
saw a car’s headlights speeding toward them. They remembered the sign’s warning and scrambled up separate trees. The driver, who was a farmer, said, “I know
I saw someone climb one of these trees.” He went to
the first tree and yelled, “Who’s up there?” The first
man was very silent and the farmer moved to the next
tree. Again he yelled, “Who’s up there?” The second
man knew that the farmer would take a closer look this
time, so he said, “Whooo Whooo [like an owl].” The
farmer then went to the last tree thinking he could have
made a mistake and did not see anyone. The farmer
looked up in the next tree and said, “Who’s up there?”
The third man then said confidently,
“Mooooooooooooooo.”
Slice
Joe, a notoriously bad golfer, hits his ball off the first
tee and watches as it slices to the right and disappears
through an open window. Figuring that’s the end of it,
he gets another ball out of his bag and plays on. On
the eighth hole, a police officer walks up to Joe on
the course and says, “Did you hit a golf ball through
a window back there?” Joe says, “Yes I did.” “Well,”
says the police officer, “it knocked a lamp over, scaring the dog, which raced out of the house onto the
highway. A driver rammed into a brick wall to avoid
the dog, sending three people to hospital. And it’s all
because you sliced the ball.” “Oh my goodness,” says
Joe, “is there anything I can do?” “Yes there is,” the
cop says. “Try keeping your head down and close up
your stance a bit.”
Tatum’s Hardware & Supply, Inc.
Mother
A couple had a fight after which the wife started packing her belongings. Her husband asked her, “Where
are you packing to go?” She answered, “I’m going to
my mother.” After a while, the man started packing
too.She asked, “What are you doing, where are you
going?” He answered, “I’m going to my mother.” She
asked, “What happens to the 6 children then?” Her
husband answered, “You’re going to your mother, I’m
going to my mother, and the children will also have to
go to their mother!”
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Super Bowl
Four Bases Loaded
A guy named Bob receives a free ticket to the Super
Bowl from his company. Unfortunately, when Bob
arrives at the stadium he realizes the seat is in the
last row in the corner of the stadium. About halfway
through the first quarter, Bob notices an empty seat 10
rows off the field right on the 50 yard line. He decides
to take a chance and makes his way through the stadium and around the security guards to the empty seat.
As he sits down, he asks the gentleman sitting next to
him, “Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?” The man
says no. Now, very excited to be in such a great seat
for the game, Bob again inquires of the man next
to him, “This is incredible! Who in their right mind
would have a seat like this at the Super Bowl and not
use it? The man replies, “Well, actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife,
but she passed away. This is the first Super Bowl we
haven’t been together since we got married in 1967.”
“Well, that’s really sad,” says Bob, “but still, couldn’t
you find someone to take the seat? A relative or a close
friend?” “No,” the man replies, “they’re all at the
funeral.”
A year ago, Hans Vonk conducted the St. Louis Symphony Orchestra in a production of Beethoven’s Ninth
Symphony. During the final movement of Beethoven’s
Ninth, there is a large pause in the Orchestration where
only the chorus sings. Four bass players, feeling they
could use this break to get out and stretch their legs,
slipped off backstage and proceeded to go outside to
smoke a cigarette and take a little nip from a bottle
one of them was carrying. Well, they lost track of time
and became quite inebriated. Finally one of them says,
“Say! We should really be getting back in... It’s almost
time to play our part.” “Don’t worry,” confided one of
the other bassists with a wink. “I’ve fixed it so that we
have a longer pause... I tied together the last parts of
the conductor’s score before our part begins!” All the
bass players had a good chuckle and took a few more
swigs and headed in. Once they popped back on stage,
they saw that conductor Vonk was absolutely furious.
After all, it was the bottom of the Ninth, the basses
were loaded, and the score was tied.
FOR ALL
YOUR
FISHING
NEEDS!
Why Dogs are Better Than Kids
• 45 minutes to get a dog ready to go outside in the
winter? -- NOT!
• Dogs cannot lie.
• Dogs never resist nap time.
• You don’t need to get extra phone lines for a dog.
• Dogs don’t pester you about getting a kid.
• Dogs don’t care if the peas have been touched by the
potatoes.
• Dogs are housebroken by the time they are 12 weeks
old.
• Your dog isn’t embarrassed if you sing in public.
People tend to make rules for others
and exceptions for themselves.
MooreCo Bait & Tackle
Dale’s Chimney Sweeps
2206 Highway 177-A • Bonifay, FL 32425
(3 miles past Bonifay Elementary School)
850-547-0410 • 850-258-5300
Open Monday-Saturday - 6a.m.-5p.m.
850-547-9511
Follow us on facebook @ Moore Co of Bonifay, FL
6/ September 2015
Street Talk America
25 years experience
Complete Chimney
& Fireplace Services
3411 Spring Valley Ln
Bonifay, FL 32425
Too Hurried
By: Dr. Charlie Hinson
That’s the way I felt. Elaine and I had
been working at Vacation Bible School
with several age groups every day,
sharing what it means to be a missionary. We had drug out all our curios and
souvenirs from Africa, Costa Rica, El
Salvador, Guatemala, and Mexico, and used them as
visuals to share the work we did in each of these countries. I loved every minute of it, and I think the kids
enjoyed it as Elaine and I explained ‘the call of God.’ But as we completed our last class a little before four
o’clock, I really had to reach down deep to find enough
strength for the last five minutes. The class was for 4th
graders, and for some reason they had been
extraordinarily attentive as I shared with them about
“the protective band of angels that surrounds those
who love the Lord.” I don’t know why I said it, but my
closing words were “but God sends that band of angels
only for those who have given their hearts to Him.”
Whew! I said to myself. “It’s over. We made it. Now
we can go home and get some rest. C’mon, Elaine; let’s
get out of here.” That’s when I saw the kid. He had
been sitting on the carpet with the group listening to the
stories. He had gotten up and gone over to his group
leader and was talking quietly with her. Not knowing
what was going on, I froze in place and waited. Then
the group leader said, “Brother Charlie, ____ has a
question for you.” I thought, ‘Oh, no, he wants me
to tell him some more stories about the mission field.’
Instead, I said, “Co’mere.” He came over, and almost
whispering in my ear, he said, “What do I have to do
to become a child of God?” I asked, “You’re not a
Christian?” He said, “No sir, I’m not, but I would like
to be.”
Come to find out he lived in the northern states,
but had been shipped to Crestview for a visit with his
mother, and just by accident, someone had invited him
to attend VBS. I said, “Do you know how to pray?” He said, “No sir, can you help me?” I felt so ashamed
for having focused on ‘gettin’ out of there’ because I
was tired. Instead, I led him in the sinner’s prayer, and
before the first line was finished, the entire group had
bowed their heads toward the carpet and was praying
the prayer along with him. It broke me completely up. All I could say was, “Dear Lord, forgive me for being
in too big a hurry.” How many have I missed through
the years? I will try harder!
Serving the Panhandle since 1988
STAR FIRE
EXTINGUISHER INC.
Sean Collins
Owner
850-526-1002
starfireext@yahoo.com
4206 Kelson Ave.
Marianna, FL 32446
Mr. Curtis’ Classics
A good friend and faithful reader, Mr. John Curtis,
sent us an email requesting we print pictures of antique
automobiles and let folks guess the year, make and
model. We thought that was a swell idea!
So, here goes, do you know what this beauty is?
Turn to page 31 and learn more about her.
C O V I N G T O N MU
BUY • SELL • TRADE • REPAIR • LAYAWAY
S
I
1288
Jackson
Ave
•
Chipley,
FL
32428
850-557-1918
C
covingtonmusic@yahoo.com
850-638-5050
Sales & Music Lessons
Guitar, Bass, Drums, Piano, Mandolin,
Violin, Banjo & Dobro Lessons
Piano
WANTED: Musical Instruments
Tuning
of any kind and any condition.
Street Talk America
September 2015 /7
Aunt Judy’s Kitchen
Southern Recipes from
“The Old House”
By: Judy Jenkins
Spring Chicken
4 pcs. boneless, skinless breast pounded to ½ inch thick
Lowry’s Season Salt
6 slices bacon
¼ cup regular mustard
1/3 cup honey
2 tbs mayonnaise
2 tsp dried onion flakes
2 cups shredded Colby/Jack cheese
First sprinkle and rub in season salt. Cover and
chill in refrigerator for 30 minutes. Cook bacon
until crispy and drain. Saute chicken in bacon
drippings 3-5 minutes per side until brown. Put
chicken in 9x13 dish. Mix mustard, honey, mayonnaise and onion flakes in small bowl. Spread honey
mustard over chicken. Crumble bacon and sprinkle
bacon and cheese on top. Bake @ 350º for 30 minutes or until chicken is done.
By His hands we are fed,
thank you Lord for daily bread.
Chocolate Cookie Chews
Recipe from April Patterson
½ cup crisco
1 ½ cups sugar
2 tsp vanilla
2 eggs
6 tbs cocoa powder
2 cups flour
½ tsp salt
1/3 cup milk
1 cup powdered sugar
Cream shortening, sugar and vanilla. Beat in salt,
eggs and chocolate. Add milk and flour alternately
and mix well. Chill 2-3 hours. Roll into 1 inch balls
and roll into powdered sugar. Bake on greased
cookie sheet in 350º oven for 8-10 minutes.
Homemade Mocha Frappuccino
Also known as “April Patterson’s
Vacation Bible School Hooch”
1 freshly brewed pot of strong coffee
6 leg quarters
½ gallon milk
½ cup soy sauce
1 cup chocolate syrup
1 small can tomato paste
1 ½ cups sugar
2 tsp garlic
When coffee is finished brewing add sugar and stir
1/2 cup brown sugar – packed
Place chicken in crock-pot. Mix remaining ingredi- until dissolved. Add coffee and chocolate to milk
ents in bowl and then pour over chicken. Cook in in milk jug and shake well. Chill and shake well
before serving.
slow-cooker on high for 4 hours or until done.
Soy Garlic Chicken
Three Chicks
Cleaning
Residential
& Commercial
(850)768-0022
(850)956-2408
Carrie Brown, Owner
creigncarrie@hotmail.com
1216 Hwy 179 Bonifay, Fl 32425
Holmes Creek
Artist & Fleas
Community Market
3035 Main Street
Vernon, FL.
at Holmes Creek
Pizza & Pasta Co.
Bring your stuff to sell or trade!
Spaces for rent!
Call Holmes Creek Pizza & Pasta Co.
for more info (850) 535-1555
Fresh from
the Farm to
your Freezer!
Reserve your produce early for September 19th!
VEGETABLES
Fordhooks
Baby Butter Beans
Edamame Beans
Green Beans
Pole Beans
Speckled Butter Beans
Blackeye Peas
Butter Peas
Crowder Peas
Green Peas
Pinkeye Peas
Sugar Snap Peas
White Acre Peas
Zipper Peas
Cream White Corn 4#
Cream Yellow Corn 4#
White Corn
Yellow Corn
$27
$16
$20
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$20
$20
$16
$10
$10
$16
$16
Collard Greens
Mustard Greens
Turnip Greens
Spinach
Kale
Cut Okra
Breaded Okra
Whole Okra
Sliced Yellow Squash
Sliced Zucchini
Broccoli
Cauliflower
Brussel Sprouts
Mixed Vegetables
Soup Blend
Baby Carrots
Whole White Potatoes(small)
Sweet Potato Chunks
Rhubarb 5#
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$16
$20
Place your order online @
www.SouthwesternProduce.com
FRUITS
Blueberries 5#
$20
Blackberries 5#
$20
Raspberries 5#
$20
Pineapple Chunks 5#
$20
Whole Strawberries 5#
$20
Fruit Medley 5#
$20
Dark Sweet Cherries 5# $22
Peaches
$20
Cranberries 5#
$20
Mango Chunks 5#
$20
Green Peanuts
$20
Most items are in 8 lb. bags unless
otherwise noted and have been
shelled, blanched & frozen.
Vegetable
Pick Up Day
September 19th!
For your convenience, you have two locations to choose from for pick up.
Orders must be placed by 4pm EST September 17th. You can call in your order or order online 24/7.
Chipley Pickup
Main Street Market
1251 Jackson Ave. Chipley, FL
Marianna Pickup
Hopkins Motors
Corner of Hwy 77 & Hwy 90
4909 Hwy 90 in Marianna, FL
Pick up 7am-11am CST
To order & pick up in Chipley call
To order & pick up in Marianna call
or www.SouthwesternProduce.com
& click on Chipley order form.
or www.SouthwesternProduce.com
& click on Marianna order form.
Pick up 1:30pm-5pm CST
1-877-638-2330
1-850-209-4111
Street Talk America
September 2015 /9
Before it Starts
ROOFING
LLC
Call Eric 850•703-7639
Fast - Friendly - Reliable
Email: wilson8199@gmail.com
Lic#RC29027526
Why I Quit
Attending Football Games
• The coach never comes to visit.
• Every time I go, they ask for money.
• The people that sit beside me don’t seem friendly.
• The seats are hard.
• The football fans are a bunch of hypocrites... they
only go to see what others are wearing.
• Some games go into overtimes making it late when I
get home.
• The band plays songs I’ve never heard before.
• The games are scheduled on my only day to sleep in
and run errands.
• My parents took me to too many games when I was
little.
• Since I read books about football, I feel like I know
more than the coaches.
• I don’t want to take the children because I want them
to choose for themselves what team they like best.
DEE’S RESTAURANT
Specializing in
Steaks & Seafood
Daily Lunch Specials
Starting at $5.99
535-6449
Take-Out
Catering
Open Monday - Saturday
Breakfast • Lunch • Dinner
On the corner of Hwy 79 and 277
3730 Hwy 277 • Vernon
10/ September 2015
Street Talk America
A guy comes home from work, runs into the living
room and flops down in front of the TV. He quickly
turns it on and starts flipping through the channels.
His wife walks into the living room and the guys says
to her, “Wife, hurry up and get me a drink before it
starts!” The wife goes to the fridge, pours a glass of
tea and gives it to her husband. The husband slams
down the tea, gives her the empty glass, and tells her,
“Hurry up and get me another one! It’s gonna start
soon!” The wife goes to the fridge, refills his glass and
takes it to her husband. The guy slams the tea again,
gives her the empty glass, and says, “Hurry up and
get me another and bring my supper, it’s gonna start
ANY minute!” The wife, getting upset, goes to make
her husband a plate and pours him another glass of
tea. She stomps back to the living room, gives it to her
husband and says, “You know, all you ever do around
here is come home from work, sit in front of the TV
and bark orders at me....” The guy, hearing his wife
complaining, takes a bite of his supper, sighs, and
says, “YEP, IT’S STARTED!”
What’s Different with Merv
Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell
through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears.
Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with
the company for a rather large sum of money and
went on his way. One day, Merv decided to invest his
money in a small, but growing telecom business called
Plexus Communications. After weeks of negotiations,
he bought the company outright. But, after signing on
the dotted line, he realized that he knew nothing about
running such a business and quickly set out to hire
someone who could do that for him. The next day he
had set up three interviews. The first guy was great.
He knew everything he needed to and was very inter-
Burke Bro’s Air Conditioning
& Appliance Service, Inc.
Appliance Repair
Sales-Service
Installation
850-535-4622
Family Owned
Robert E. Burke
*Insured*
ST. LIC. #RA0060822
esting. At the end of the interview, Merv asked him,
“Do you notice anything different about me?” And
the gentleman answered, “Why yes, I couldn’t help
but notice you have no ears.” Merv got very angry
and threw him out. The second interview was with a
woman, and she was even better than the first guy.
He asked her the same question, “Do you notice
anything different about me?” and she replied, “Well,
you have no ears.” Merv again was upset and tossed
her out. The third and last interview was the best of all
three. It was with a very young man who was fresh out
of college. He was smart. He was handsome. And he
seemed to be a better businessman than the first two
put together. Merv was anxious, but went ahead and
asked the young man the same question, “Do you notice anything different about me?” And to his surprise,
the young man answered: “Yes. You wear contact lenses.” Merv was shocked, and said, “What an incredibly observant young man. How in the world did you
know that?” The young man fell off his chair laughing
hysterically and replied, “Well, it’s pretty hard to wear
glasses with no ears!”
Isn’t it strange how drivers who go
slower than you are idiots and those
that go faster are maniacs?
Dog Dayz Spa
1430 Brickyard Rd. • Chipley
• Over 9 Years Experience
• Call For Appointment
• Walk-Ins Accepted With Time Available
Grooming & Boarding
For Cats & Dogs
Angie Oge, Groomer
Partnering with Barrk Rescue, Inc.
Animals Available
For Adoption!
Hours: Mon. Tues. Thur. & Fri. 8am-5:30pm
Wed.8am-5pm Open Saturday for Boarding
850-638-SPA1 (7721)
Q: What’s the definition of
mixed emotions?
A: When you see your mother-in-law
backing off a cliff in your brand new car.
If you want the job done, call
GRIFFIN HEAVY EQUIPMENT
Tree Removal • Tree Trimming • Bulldozer Work
Farm Tractor Work • Asphalt Patchwork • Ditch Witch
Dumptruck Hauling • Landscaping • Sodding
Fill Dirt & Sand Clay • Sprigging & Seeding
Excavating Work • Pond Digging • Road Building
Rock Hauling • Demolition
Office, 850-773-2639 • Travis Griffin - Owner, 850-258-9757
4230 Hwy 77 • Chipley, FL 32428
Street Talk America
September 2015 /11
Congrats to Tamara & Chris at
South Bridge Styles on their new location!
We wish you many more years of success!
~Bill & Peggy Dobbins
2878 Church Street, Vernon
850-535-2866 (AVON)
Walk-Ins Welcome
Tue/Thurs/Fri 9am-5pm • Wed/Sat 9am-1pm
Control your temper,
for anger labels you a fool.
Ecclesiastes 7:9 NLT
HARRIS
God Bless America
& Our Troops!
FARM SUPPLY & HARDWARE
850-535-4128
3302 Creek Rd. Vernon, FL
We Are Gearing Up Austrian Winter Peas
For Hunting Season! Winter Deer Plot Mix
Ryegrass
Prine
Jumbo
Big Boss
Gulf
Iron Clay Peas
Oats
Feed Soybeans
Feed Wheat
Feed Brown Top
Ryegrass
Time to plant your greens!
We carry Wild Game Innovations
Cameras & Accessories
Mon., Tues., Wed. & Fri. 7:30am-5:30pm
Thurs. & Sat. 7:30am-12pm • Closed Sunday
It’s Bonifay Rodeo Time!
Get Your Advance Rodeo Tickets Here!
We have a little bit of EVERYTHING!
Grandfather Clock
A man is in a pawn shop and sees this beautiful Grandfather Clock and winds up buying it. He asks the
owner if he can deliver the clock and the owner replies
that he cannot make deliveries. So only living a few
blocks away the man decides to strap the clock on his
back and carry it the few blocks. After a block or so,
a drunk comes staggering out of a bar and bumps into
the man knocking him down on his back and smashing
the clock to bits. He then jumps up and starts cussing
the drunk out and saying “Look what you did to my
beautiful clock, you idiot.” The drunk then replies,
“Gee buddy, I’m really sorry why don’t you wear a
wristwatch like everyone else?”
No Gators Here
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting
an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist
shouted, “Are there any gators around here?” “Naw,”
the man hollered back, “they ain’t been around for
years!” Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked
the guy, “How’d you get rid of the gators?” “We didn’t
do nothing,’” the beachcomber said. “Wow,” said the
tourist. The beachcomber added, “The sharks got ‘em.”
A man called the Family Inn and asked how
much they charged for a room. The clerk told
him that the rates depended on room size and
number of people. “Do you take children?”
the man asked. “No, sir” replied the clerk.
“Only cash and credit cards.”
ber 26th - October 31st
s: 4:00 PM - 8:00 PM
ys: 12 Noon - 8:00 PM
HAMMACK
FARMS
HAMMACK
FARMS
Opening
Day
H
A
M
M
A
C
K
F
A
R
2015
September 26th! MS
2015
2015
vailable for school and church groups!
Hay Maze ~ Pumpkin Patch 96.9 The Legend will be here
~ Tractor Train ~ Hay Ride opening day from 1pm-4pm.
OPENING DAY - SEPTEMBER 26TH!
Open September 26th - October 31st
pe Slide
~ Playground
O
P October
ING D
- 8p.m.
AY - SEFridays:
September
26thE-N
31st
Sunflower
Field
PTEM4p.m.
BER 2 6 T H !
Saturdays:
12
noon - 8p.m.
Fridays:
4:00
PM
8:00
PM
Reservations
are
available
for
Se
CORN MAZE
ptember 26soon!
vities to school
be announced
th - October 31st
Saturdays:and
12church
Noon - groups!
8:00 PM
Fridays: 4:00 PM
- 8:00 PM
*Reservations available
for
school
and
church
groups!
S
a
tu
days:• Hay
CornrBox
12 NMaze
oon - 8:00 PM
Pumpkin Patch • Petting Zoo
Tractor Train • Hay Ride
20’ Pipe Slide • Sunflower Field
ractor Train ~
Hay Ride
Playground
20'toPip
More activities
beeannounced
soon!
Slid&e More
~ Pla
Corn Box
Maze ~ Pumpkin Patch
*R~esHay
ervatio
ns av lable for school
Petting Zoo ~ Tractor ai
Train ~ Hay Ride
and church groups!
orn Slide
20'CPipe
Playground
Box ~~ H
ay Maze ~ Pum
pkin Patch
Petti
Sunflower
Field
ng Zoo ~ T
yground
Sunflower Field
More activities
to be announce
d soon!
Find us on
social media!
Find us on
social media!
Find us on social media!
Find us on
social media!
EED MORE INFO?
850.768.9673
NEED MORE INFO?
850.768.9673
hite Road - Bonifay,
FL 32425
850.768.9673
2387hammackfarmsbonifayflorida@gmail.com
Joe White Road - Bonifay, FL 32425
msbonifayflorida@gmail.com
hammackfarmsbonifayflorida@gmail.com
NEED MORE IN
www.hammackfarms.com
FO ?
www.hammackfarms.com
w.hammackfarms.com
850
.768.9673
2387 JoJoe
2387
• Bonifay, FL 32425
e WhiteWhite
Road - BonifRoad
ay ,
FL 32425
hammackfarms
bonifayflorida@
gmail.com Street Talk America
www.hammack
farms.com
September 2015 /13
home for now is best, here are some alternatives for
you:
1. Workbooks- many department stores have fun,
age-appropriate workbooks for preschoolers. You can
allot time a few days a week to work through the skills
in the workbook. It is important for them to begin to
How important is Pre-K?
learn their alphabet, sounds, how to write their name,
Really? My mother in law
fine motor skills and reading readiness.
is determined for me to put
2. Utilize internet resources- sign up for interactive,
my daughter in Pre-K but I quit my job to stay home
online learning.
when she was born. I want to enjoy her last year
3. DIY preschool:
before Kindergarten. Am I depriving her?
• The internet (and library) is full of fun ways to learn
Preschooler Mom at home in creative, inexpensive ways. Set up games
with colored blocks, make homemade gift cards and
let your child cut it out for you, or play with alphabet
Dear Mom:
flash cards.
That is a question that can easily be debated either
• Set up art stations. Allow your child to color, paint,
way. While it is true that schools now expect children play with play dough, puzzles, etc.
to begin Kindergarten with a certain amount of skills
• When you read aloud to your child, let your finger
and knowledge, that does not make it necessary.
follow along with the words so that she can learn the
Years back there was no Kindergarten, much less
process of reading from left to right.
Pre-K! But still people graduated from high school,
If you are concerned about social skills developbecame gainfully employed, pursued higher education ment, there are alternative ways to meet that need as
and graduated from colleges. But of course, the cliwell- join a play group in your community, or organize
mate in education has morphed and changed over the
your own with other likeminded stay at home moms.
years.
Allow your child to take part in Vacation Bible School
Personally, I am an advocate for letting kids be kids. or Sunday School to get accustomed to the class room
There is plenty of time for them to learn to read, cut
setting and to learn how to share.
with scissors and write neatly. But convincing arSee the world as your laboratory or classroom. If
guments have been made about achieving a level of
you are intentional in locating learning activities, opreadiness before school. If you are concerned your
portunities will abound. Check out museums for kid
child is getting behind, and you believe keeping them
camps. Visit art or musical offerings in your community.
“Where you go to meet your friends.”
Many students thrive in the Pre-K environment. As
the parent, you know what is best for your child. EnServing Vernon Since 1994
sure your child knows she is loved, feels safe and offer
an enriched environment with plenty of exploration
Dear Sherri,
Somsri’s
Buffet
Friday Night
20 PC. CHICKEN MEAL DEAL
Buffet $9.99
4 - 16 oz. Sides
Catfish Fillets
& BBQ Ribs
8 Dinner Rolls
Sat.&
Sun. Breakfast
Gallon of Tea
$39.99
Bar w/Free Coffee
Tues. & Wed. 11a.m.-2p.m.
Thurs. & Fri. 11a.m.-2p.m. & 4:30p.m.-8p.m.
Sat. 8a.m.-2p.m.
850-535-6425
Sun. 8a.m.-5 p.m.
Hwy 79 • Vernon, FL
14/ September 2015
Street Talk America
A Bible study for women
Hosted by Sherri Evans
September 15th, 6p.m.
@ Milk and Honey Frozen Yogurt
4767 Hwy 90 Marianna, FL
For more info, join us on facebook!
“Immersion A Bible Study for Women”
opportunity. Children are natural learners- do what
you can to capitalize on her interest.
At home preschool activities can be just as beneficial
as formal, classroom settings. Both are excellent ways
to prepare your child for future education. If she falls
behind once school starts, be sure to communicate
with her teacher and add extra practice at home or
with a tutor.
Pre-K is a bit too early to begin to worry about ACT’s,
SAT’s or her entire educational career. Support and
encourage learning every chance you get. But don’t
forget your child is already learning important life
skills by watching you: hygiene skills, how to be kind
and considerate, sharing, work ethic and love of learning.
Pray about your choice. Talk to other moms and
families in your area. Visit some pre-K’s. Then trust
your instincts!
Sherry Evans is a wife and a mother of three boys. She is an
ordained minister with the Assemblies of God and an Associate
Pastor at a local church. To read more from Sherri, visit her blog
‘When God Whispers Over Your Life’ @ sherrievans.blogspot.com.
The advice offered in Dear Sherri, is intended for informational and inspirational
purposes only. Use of the column is not intended to replace or substitute for any
professional, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. If you have specific
concerns or a situation in which you require professional, psychological or medical
help, you should consult with an appropriately trained and qualified specialist.
CHIPLEY HARDWARE
& MOBILE HOME SUPPLIES
1163 Jackson Ave. Chipley, FL 32428
(850) 638-1815
Peanut Boiling Pots
Hurricane
Supplies &
Generators
Available!
Large Selection of
NEBO Flashlights
YETI COOLERS & TUMBLERS
The Medical Gallery
Home Medical Equipment
217 North Waukesha Street • Bonifay, FL 32425
(850) 547-6186
DeRoyal
Knee Warrior
Braces Available!
Ankle, Elbow,
Shoulder, Fracture
& Spine Bracing
The Medical Gallery is your local, one-stop
shop for medical equipment supplies.
Captured
ture. This time, however, it included a burning foamy
chemical called “shampoo.” What sick minds could
invent such a liquid? My only consolation is the piece
of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
Day 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their
accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement
throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise
and smell the delicious odors. More importantly I
overheard that my confinement was due to MY power
of “allergies.” Must learn what this is and how to use it
to my advantage.
Day 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and may be snitches. The dog is routinely released
and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously
a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be
an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue,
something akin to mole speak, and speaks with them
regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due
to his current placement in the metal room his safety is
assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with
bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on
fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The
only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape,
and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another
houseplant.
Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by
weaving around their feet while they were walking
almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their
favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
Day 762 - Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep deprivation, incessant pleas for food at
all hours of the night.
Day 767 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the
headless body in an attempt to make them aware of
what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their
hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what
Inheritance
a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.
“Is there anything wrong?” asked the waiter of the
Day 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are.
young, well-dressed customer who sat staring grimly
For no good reason I was chosen for the water torinto his drink. “Two months ago my grandfather died
and left me one- hundred thousand dollars,” said the
man. “That doesn’t sound like anything to be upset
1007 N. Waukesha St. • Bonifay
850-547-1958
about,” said the waiter. “It should happen to me.”
“Yeah,” said the sour young man, “but last month an
B.S.M. Gumbo
uncle on my father’s side passed away. He left me
• 16oz hot ground sausage • 16oz mild ground sausage
ninety-five thousand dollars.” “So why are you sitting
• 2 Jalapeño peppers –chopped • 1 onion – chopped
Fry above ingredients and drain. Set aside
here looking so unhappy?” Asked the waiter.
• 1 package Gumbo base from B.S.M. • 1 box Jambalaya mix
“This month – so far – not a cent.”
Bonifay Seafood Market
from B.S.M. • 1 ½ lb. peeled shrimp – cooked
• Grouper throats – steamed • 2 cups instant rice
Mix the Jambalaya mix instant rice in 2 quart casserole dish. Cover with
water to the top of the dish and cover with lid. Leave a small opening for
steam to escape and cook for 30 minutes in microwave. Mix remaining
ingredients and Jambalaya in large crock pot. Add more water to fill
crock pot and cook on low for an hour.
• Fish • Bagged Oysters
• Scallops • Shrimp
• Snow Crab Legs
FRESH SEAFOOD
SELECTIONS
We
Steam
for
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EBT Accepted
Billy’s Train Stop
The
850-415-7115 Friday’s
A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her
Fried Fish
young son, Billy, playing with his new electric train
in the living room. She heard the train stop and Billy
said, “All of you cry babies who want off, get the
heck off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you
mama’s boys who are getting on, get your butts in the
Monday - Friday, 4:30p.m.-Until
train, ‘cause we’re going down the tracks.” The mother
• Fried & Baked Chicken •Baked Ham
went nuts and told her son, “We don’t use that kind of
•Fried Pork Chops •Country Fried Steak
language in this house. Now I want you to go to your
room, and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS.
Fresh Vegetables Every Day
When you come out, you may play with your train,
• Homemade Casseroles •Turnips
but I want you to use nice language.” Two hours later,
•Fried Okra •Mustard Greens
the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing
•Lima Beans •Black Eyed Peas
with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother
•Mashed Potatoes & Gravy •Corn
heard her son say, “All passengers who are disembark•Cabbage •Chicken & Rice
ing from the train, please remember to take all of your
Open 10:30a.m.-2:30p.m. ~ Closed Sat.
belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us
686 5th St. Chipley, FL
today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope
you will ride with us again soon.” She hears the little
Always be joyful. Never stop praying.
boy continue, “For those of you just boarding, we ask
Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is
you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat.
God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.
Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us
today.” As the mother
began to smile, the child
added, “For those of you
who are annoyed about
the TWO-HOUR delay,
WHERE OUR ROOTS
please see the old hag in
ARE PLANTED
the kitchen.”
Colonial Restaurant
Southern Style Buffet
Now Open For Dinner!
HERITAGE
From humble beginnings based on
affordable, trustworthy service, we
have grown into a reliable resource
your family can depend on. Rooted
in our traditions, we stay firmly
connected to the families we serve
and the care we provide.
We continue serving all faiths
and all families in the only way
we know how - by staying true
to our heritage.
Genie in a Bottle
A man found a brass
lamp, rubbed it
vigorously, and a genie
appeared. “For freeing
me from the lamp, I will
grant you any wish you
desire,” the genie said.
The man replied, “I
want a spectacular job.
A challenge that no man
has ever succeeded at or
has ever even dared try.”
“Poof!” Said the genie.
“You’re a housewife.”
Honoring Those We Serve
Established in 1931
Reasonably Priced
Integrity You Can Trust
Traditional Services and
Cremations
80
Always Available To The
OVER
Families We Serve
Guaranteed Professionalism
Experienced Staff
DEFUNIAK SPRINGS • (850) 892-2511
FREEPORT • (850) 835-2511
clary-glenn.com
Joel Glenn, LFD, Owner • Paula Glenn, Owner
©adfinity
Street Talk America
September 2015 /17
A & G GUTTER LLC.
996 Donnell Rd. • Chipley, FL 32428
Seamless Gutters
Robert ‘Bob’ Collins
850-638-4333 or 850-624-5488
recfl@bellsouth.net
Insured
Brown Pump Repair
850-638-9355
John R. Brown, Owner
Find the seven hidden peanuts and color the picture.
18/ September 2015
Street Talk America
Chipley, Florida
Mundy’s Realty
Commercial
Residential
Farms
Ranches
Dennis R. Mundy
Broker/Realtor/Owner
Cell:850-326-4403
Office:850-352-2300
Bonnett Pond Rd, Chipley, FL 32428
woodmen.org
3185 Main St. Hwy 231
Cottondale, FL 32431
Dennisrm@embarqmail.com
Find the Ten Differences
Kathy C. Rudd, FIC
Representative
Phone: 850-832-0660
Fax: 850-638-3555
Cell: 850-933-7931
KCRudd@woodmen.org
Woodmen of the World Life Insurance Society, Omaha, NE
There were three
tomatoes: a mom, a dad
and a son.The son lagged
behind and fell splat on the
floor. His dad yelled to him,
“Ketchup, son.”
Two fleas were walking out
of the cinema when they
discovered it was raining
hard. “Shall we walk?” said
one flea.“No,” said the
other, “lets take a dog.”
Family Dentistry of
Northwest Florida
Four Doctors to Serve You!
Dr. Ernie Hooper, Dr. Brian Parker,
Dr. Hilary Whitaker & Dr. John Wilson
Cosmetic, General
& Family Dentistry
Veneers • Crowns • Dentures
Cleanings • Whitening
Most Insurance Bonding • Implant Crowns
Accepted
Two Convenient Locations
110 E. North Ave.
Bonifay, FL 32425
(850) 547-9290
8/28 9/4 9/11 9/18 9/25 10/2 10/16 10/23
10/30 11/6 8/28 9/4
9/11 9/18 9/25 10/2
10/9 10/16 10/23 10/30 1410A Brickyard Rd.
Chipley, FL 32428
(850) 415-1411
Chipley Tigers
@ Marianna
Graceville
Blountstown
Northview
@ Vernon
@ Franklin County*
Baker (HC)
@ West Gadsden*
Liberty County*
@ Holmes County
Cottondale Hornets
@ Freeport
@ Landmark Christian Academy
South Walton
@ Vernon*
@ Holmes County*
North Bay Haven Academy (HC)
@ Jay
Wewahitchka*
Sneads*
@ Graceville*
*District Game (HC) Homecoming
School has started and
Parents are happy everywhere.
The grid iron is ready.
The boys are focused and prepared.
The bleachers are waiting,
For fans young and old.
The town holds its breath
For the season to unfold.
Wishing a
Anticipation is mounting.
ll
We are all counting down,
teams a
For our team to cross the line
successfu
l
And score the first touchdown.
s
e
a
s
o
n
!
By: Ashley Rester
Heather N Wells PA
Heather Wells, CPA-Owner
P.O. Box 160 • 1378 N Railroad Ave. Chipley, FL 32428
(850)638-0408
heathernwellspa@gmail.com
Income Taxes • Payroll • Sales Tax
Bookkeeping • QuickBooks Pro Advisor
9/4 9/11 9/18 9/25 10/2 10/9 10/16 10/23 10/30 11/6 Graceville Tigers
@ Chipley
North Bay Haven Academy
Holmes County*
@ Jay
@ Sneads*
West Gadsden (HC)
@ Vernon*
Wewahitchka*
Cottondale*
@ Marianna
Holmes County Blue Devils
8/28 9/4 9/11 9/18 9/25 10/9 10/16 10/23 10/30 11/6 Baker
@ Bozeman
Freeport
@ Graceville*
Cottondale* (HC)
@ Sneads*
@ North Bay Haven Academy
@ Vernon*
Wewahitchka*
Chipley
CASTAWAY
Oyster Bar & Seafood Restaurant
425 St. Johns Rd. • Bonifay, FL 32425
“Cast Your Worries Away!” 547-2112
Flounder
Shrimp
Jambalaya
Scallops
Catfish
Mullet
try our
Boat Trash!
Lunch Specials Available
Hours: Wednesday - Saturday 11am-9pm
8/28 9/4 9/25 10/2 10/9 10/16 10/23 10/29 11/6 8/28 9/4 9/11 9/18 9/25 10/2 10/9 10/23 10/30 11/6 Marianna Bulldogs
Chipley
@ Port St. Joe
Florida A&M (HC)
@ East Gadsden*
@ Blountstown
Walton*
@ Florida State University
@ Rutherford*
Graceville
Sneads Pirates
North Bay Haven Academy*
Bronson
@ Maclay
@ Wewahitchka*
@ Munroe
Graceville*
Holmes County* (HC)
@ Cottondale*
Vernon*
West Gadsden
Buy - Sell - Pawn
Watch
Batteries
Jewelry
Repair
Keys
Made
Pawn
D&S
Visit our showroom
for excellent prices
& beautiful gifts!
JEWELRY, SILVER,
COINS & ETC.
Jewelry&Loan
Monday - Friday 9 AM - 4:45 PM
8/28 9/4 9/18 9/25 10/2 10/9
10/16
10/23 10/30 11/6
8/28 9/4 9/11 9/18 10/2 10/9 10/16 10/23 10/30
11/5 850-547-6483
3005-A Main Street
Vernon, FL 32462
Located at the Red Light in Vernon.
Vernon Yellow Jackets
Florida A&M
@ West Gadsden
Cottondale*
Chipley
@ Wewahitchka*
Arlington (HC)
Graceville*
Holmes County*
@ Sneads*
@ Blountstown
Walton Braves
Blountstown
@ South Walton
Arnold
@ Baker
Rutherford*
Gulf Breeze (HC)
@ Marianna*
Northview
@ East Gadsden*
@ Bay
Street Talk America
September 2015 /21
Tales by
Gator Brown
Fishing with Lilla Jane
The One That Got Away
Sitting out here in the smokehouse, I can hear the
rain hitting the tin roof and down near Fox Bay Head,
it’s thundering. Cooking on the wood stove is a pot
of lima beans and in the oven is a pone of cornbread.
Another pot is full of yellow rice and chicken and on
the back burner I have corn on the cob boiling. I can
smell the tar burning from the fat lightered splinters
mixed with the smoke from the black jack oak. I could
have prepared this meal a lot faster on an electric or
gas range but I’m not pushed for time.
I sure enjoy these days when time is of no importance and I have all day to do a lot of nothing. Early
this morning the sun came up and found the wife, Lilla
Jane and I fishing. We can leave the house and be in
the boat fishing within five minutes because we have
five ponds in front of our house. Today we wanted a
mess of bass so we were casting with Zebco 33. Did
you know that Zebco made a 44? Well, back in 1957
they stopped making them, but I have two or three. I
use two of them for spare parts to keep the one I fish
with workable.
The Zebco 44 has a trigger, not a push button like
its sister the 33 and it’s the only reel made by Zebco
that you don’t turn upside down to cast. If any of you
people have an old 44 not being used I would love to
have it. If you give me the reel, I will in turn, take you
on a fishing trip.
I had caught one or two yearling bass when my line
started moving and I set the hook and the show began. The fish came up out of the water, some three or
four feet and dove back under water. The drag on the
44 was being tested but I knew what it could stand,
because I once landed a fat sow bass over 10 lbs. Lilla
was scrambling for the dip net and was nervous as a
you know what in a church. The next leap, the bass did
a tail walk and again tried to throw the hook but it was
set real good and his only way off was to break my
line.
After making his last dive, I began to bring him to
the boat and Lilla captured it using the dip net. The
bass was a good 5 ½ or 6 lb. lunker that had a lot of
fight in him. Now for the story of a lifetime and it’s
Lilla’s time in the spot light. Over near some thick
grass was something chasing some small bream and
making some kind of fuss. Sculling the boat easy, not
to scare him off, I placed Lilla in casting distance. Her
first cast went into the grass but the weedless hook
didn’t hang up and she managed to get it in to the water. The big bass either missed or was chasing a bream,
but it knocked water everywhere and Lilla became
more nervous than two of those ladies in church. She
reeled the worm back in and made her second cast.
I wasn’t fishing, I was watching the show and it got
real exciting. Lilla let the worm sink to the bottom and
when the bass hit the worm, it took all Lilla could do
to hang on. The fish started moving away and I cautioned her to keep the fish away from the grass. The
bass surfaced but didn’t come out of the water and
it was a monster of a fish. I didn’t know what it was
going to do and Lilla(most
was yelling
cases)for me to do some-
Hard Lime Rock
w/base $385 - 100ft.
850-319-8833
DRIVEWAYS
22/ September 2015
Street Talk America
Grading • Landclearing
thing. All I could do was hold the dip net and watch as
the fish sank and made a run straight for the boat. Lilla
was talking out of her head and reeling like a crazy
woman as the fish passed under the boat and out the
other side.
When the bass snapped the line and went on its merry way, all I could do was hold the net and try to keep
from laughing. No, I wasn’t glad that she lost the big
one, but the expression on her face... Her mouth was
open and her chin was down. She looked like someone
had just licked the last red from her candy stick. She
just sat there looking at me and her broken line, not
saying a word. I knew to use my words wisely because
she was still in shock.
Sculling back to the landing, I broke the silence saying that when a bass runs to the boat there’s not much
you can do to turn it. Lilla asked what I thought the
fish weighed. I told her that if my bass weighed six
pounds then hers was twice as big, and I left it at that.
Now you know why I’m cooking on the wood stove,
it’s to cheer her up and a good meal will work wonders. I wanted to quote from the Good Book, The Lord
giveth and taketh away.. but I knew I better not.
Later,
Gator
September
DOORBUSTER
SALE!
2”x4”x48”x100’
Welded Wire
$63.99/roll
While supplies last.
Register Now!
5K Bull Run
October 3rd
Vernon Family Health Center
3027 Main Street Vernon
Since 2000
850-535-0703
• Illness & Injury
• DOT, School & Sport
Physicals • Vaccines
• Weight Management
• Well Child
• Flu Shots & more
We care for
your heart
& other
parts too!
Walk-Ins Welcome • Appointments Available
Dr. Dawn Frost, DNP, ARNP-BC
Army Veteran
What’s the difference between a
northern fairytale and a southern
fairytale? A northern fairytale begins
“Once upon a time…” A southern fairytale
begins “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this…”
Engineered Buildings
Available!
Deck Kits!
6x8 $229
8x10 $319
10x10 $399
12x14 $539
Many more sizes to
choose from!
Attention Concrete Specialists!
New shipment of tools in stock!
Pole Barn Kits
Available
Several to choose from.
New Picket
Fence Panels
in Stock!
$21.99
Laminate Flooring
$.99 per SqFt
Heavy Duty Treated
Lattice $15.99
Panhandle Lumber & Supply
Drywall & Supplies
405 W. Hwy 90 Bonifay, Fl www.panhandlesalvage.com
Tri-State Leader of Barn Kit and Deck Kit Sales Since 1997
Prices subject to change. Call to confirm prices.
850-547-9354
Street Talk America
September 2015 /23
Flea Across Florida Yard Sale
September 10th, 11th & 12th
Come see us for a bargain at...
Bonifay Bargains
850-624-0272
A Variety of Vintage,
Modern & Whimsical
409 Depot St. • Bonifay
(next to Post Office)
Thursday-Friday 8a.m.-7p.m.
Saturday 8a.m.-5p.m.
Blonde at the Movies
We went to see a movie the other night. I sat in an aisle
seat as I usually do because it feels a little roomier.
Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the
center of the row got up and started working her way
out. “Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me,
gotta hurry, oops, excuse me.” By the time she got to
me, I was trying to look around her and I was a little
impatient, so I said, “Couldn’t you have done this a
little earlier?” “No!” she said in a loud whisper. “The
‘TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE’ message just flashed up on the screen and mine is in the
car.”
Orange Hill Express, Inc.
982 Orange Hill Rd. Chipley • 638-9505
It’s not what we do but how we do it!
Fresh Fall Plants
are Available!
Gulf Rye Grass &
Big Boss Rye Grass
Seed in Stock!
Lodge
Cast Iron
Bird Feeders & Lawn Decor
Muck Boots
Quick Draw Blocks
Tecomate Products
Deer Plot Mixes
Like us on
NON-ETHANOL GAS
Area’s Largest Purina Dealer
15 Years Strong
24/ September 2015
Street Talk America
Advice for Your Daughter
• Don’t think you can change a man ... unless he’s in
diapers.
• What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You
shut the door.
• Never let your man’s mind wander - it’s too little to
be out alone.
• Go for younger men. You might as well - they never
mature anyway.
• Women don’t make fools of men - most of them are
the do-it-yourself types.
• Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest
they are too old for it.
• Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
• The children of Israel wandered around the desert
for 40 years. Even in Biblical times, men wouldn’t
ask for directions.
• If he asks what sort of books you’re interested in,
tell him checkbooks.
• Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you
tell him jokes; it means that you laugh at his.
Two More
A Southerner was forced to take a day off from work
to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour after endless hour
for his case to be heard. When his name was called
late in the afternoon, he stood before the judge, only to
hear that court would be adjourned for the rest of the
afternoon and he would have to return the next day.
“What for?!?!?” he snapped at the judge. His Honor,
equally irked by a tedious day and sharp query, roared
out loud, “Twenty dollars contempt of court! That’s
why!” Then, noticing the man checking his wallet, the
judge relented: “That’s all right. You don’t have to pay
now.” The young man replied, “I know. But I’m just
seeing if I have enough for two more words.”
Cowboy
Boots
&Country
Roots
October 1st-3rd
Memorial Field • Bonifay, FL
GATES OPEN AT 5:30PM
PRE-SHOW STARTS AT 7:00PM
PRCA RODEO ACTION AT 7:30PM
TICKETS: ADULT $13 IN ADVANCE / $16 AT GATE
CHILDREN (AGES 4-10) $8 IN ADVANCE / $10 AT GATE
THURSDAY NIGHT: KIDS NIGHT
All Children Under 10 Get in Free (with paid adult)
FRIDAY NIGHT: MILITARY APPRECIATION NIGHT
(Wear Red, White & Blue)
SATURDAY NIGHT: TOUGH ENOUGH TO WEAR PINK
TICKETS NOW AVAILABLE ONLINE!
www.BonifayRodeo.com
PARADE
Friday, October 2nd • 1pm
Saturday, October 3rd • 1pm
5K BULL RUN
Saturday, October 3rd • 8am
Middlebrooks Park
Bareback Riding • Saddle Bronc Riding
Steer Wrestling • Tie Down Roping
Team Roping • Barrel Racing • Bull Riding
WILD COW DRESSING
Thursday, Friday & Saturday Night
During Rodeo
PANCAKE BREAKFAST
Saturday, October 3rd • 8am-11am
Bonifay Fire Department
COW CHIP BINGO
Saturday Night, October 3rd
After Rodeo • Veterans Blvd.
RODEO YOUTH BIBLE CAMP
Mon-Wed 5pm-8pm
Memorial Field
PBR Coming in May 2016
Street Talk America
September 2015 /25
Cranks My Tractor
By: BN Heard
www.CranksMyTractor.com
We Dare Defend
Our Watermelons
It seems like I’ve had watermelon on
my mind a lot lately. At work, we talk
about how watermelon just doesn’t seem
to be as good as it used to be and how thin
skinned a lot of these politically correct,
seedless, personal sized watermelons seem
to be.
Honestly, I think it’s true that watermelons
used to be better. Maybe we all used to be better when
our skins were a lot thicker, our insides were a lot
sweeter and full of seeds. There is nothing wrong with
spitting watermelon seeds; in fact, I think that it is
very medicinal.
Being home in Alabama, I realized that it was National Watermelon Day or something similar, perhaps
it was “Thin-skinned, Seedless, Not Very Sweet Watermelon Day.” That’s not a good thing to say is it?
There is no doubt in my mind that there are just as
many (probably a whole lot more) great watermelons
as there used to be. And yes, these watermelons are
big and sweet and full of seeds.
Sounds like a Southern person to me. Can I still say
that? Of course I can…
BEN SAUNDERS, DMD
PEDIATRIC DENTISTRY
• Pediatric Dental Specialist
• Children, Adolescents,
Keeping
& Teens
Kids
• Orthodontics
Smiling
• In-Office Sedation
• Hospital Dentistry
• Special Needs Patients
(850) 526- SPIT (7748)
4711 Highway 90 East • Marianna, FL
(Between Burger King & Big Lots)
It’s just that sometimes folks have
this opinion of folks in the South
that isn’t correct. They come
here or more often an “expert”
tells them how people in the
South are and how Southerners
think. More than likely, these people
have eaten too many of these thinskinned seedless watermelons.
It’s not really a “Bless your heart”
type of situation. I view it as more of a “Get
off my porch and out of my yard” situation. If you’ve
ever eaten a real watermelon sitting at a concrete
roadside table, church picnic or even while sitting on
your back steps half-naked, you know what I mean.
While home in Alabama, I went through some
pictures my Mama had saved. She was good at saving things, as a matter of fact, I think Mama tried to
save everything. I loved her, love her still and miss
her terribly. In going through some of her things, three
things hit me hard. The first was a book titled “100
=== To See Before You Die.” I didn’t have the heart
Places
to open it and check the places off I knew she got to
go08-14-2015
before she died, but I will tell you this, she bought
a lot
postcards.
Hi of
Kelley….
START USE AS YOU CAN
The
second
was
a little
angel made of rocks that I’m
… Ya Doin’ Great!
T-Bob
sure one of my brothers had given her. It simply said,
“I’ll always be with you.” I’m of the thick-skinned
watermelon variety, perfect for making watermelon
rind pickles, but every time I think of that phrase – it
gets me.
The other thing was one of those pictures. It was of
little boy sitting on his back porch, really just a stoop,
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Street Talk America
=
wearing a diaper, eating a piece of watermelon about
as big as he was. You could tell I was about as happy
as a two-year old could be.
Fifty years later, I felt the need to sit on that little
concrete stoop and see if I could get a little of that
magic back. I can’t say that I was as happy as I was
then, because you really don’t know how happy you
were (except by the sticky watermelon covered face).
About this time, an old friend drove up in his truck.
This fellow was a friend of my Daddy’s and still calls
me on the phone to check on me. He’s in his 70’s.
When he heard I was “back home,” he said, “I’m
coming to see you.” He did.
We talked watermelons and life. His premise is that
people who are not from the South are just jealous that
they can’t live the simple life and have the patience
to eat watermelons with seeds. In other words, “They
just wish they were us.” It may sound a little arrogant,
but there might be a little truth to it.
He told me a beautiful story about his mother and
how she got to spend the last ten years of her life living with him and his wife. He said it was not a burden,
describing it as wonderful and a “blessing.” However,
the thing that got me was this… He said, “We were
sitting and talking and cutting up.” I didn’t know
where he was going with this story. He said his mother
(at 90), still with her wits and her “wit,” told him in
=== the middle of the laughing and silliness, “You come
on over here, I’m going to whop you.” She was being
funny. But he did. He walked over to her. She gasped
and it was her last breath.
His mother’s last words to him were, “…I’m going
to whop you.” I laughed until I cried. If you understand that, chances are you have no problem with
seeds in your watermelon. If you do not, “Bless your
heart and stay out of my yard.”
Find more stories at www.cranksmytractor.com
Cranks My Tractor stories are published in
Street Talk America with the writer’s permission
and in hopes of making you smile.
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use this platform to clarify what I have seen as some
of the misconceptions and concerns regarding the flu
and flu shot. The flu shot will only protect against cerby: Michael Kennedy, ARNP
tain strains of the flu. Just because you get sick after
Hawkins Family Medicine
getting the flu shot does not mean it wasn’t effective,
I remember when I was younger, during an especial- it likely means it was another type of virus or bacterial infection that the flu shot is not designed to treat
ly intense football game feeling the pressure of needor prevent. You can still get the flu even after the flu
ing to do my best. It was late in the game and I knew
shot. I have...twice. But, I also was protected against
we needed to get close to the end-zone, if not score
multiple if not hundreds of known contacts with the
on the next play. After the hike of the ball, I caught a
flu and did not get sick or pass sickness to my friends
short lateral pass and began a twisting, running, stiff
arming display rivaling Bo Jackson’s Heisman perfor- and family. There are flu shots and a nasal immunizamances. As the dust settled and the whistle blew, I had tion called flu-mist available. So who exactly should
not only scored the touchdown, but realized our recess get the flu immunization? The CDC recommends,
this day in fourth grade was over. Like it or not, we are “Everyone 6 months of age and older should get a flu
vaccine every season.” This recommendation has been
in the South, and Friday nights in September means
in place since February 24, 2010 when CDC’s Advihumidity, boiled peanuts, cheering from the crowd,
sory Committee on Immunization Practices (ACIP)
the Band playing the alma mater and the start of high
voted for “universal” flu vaccination in the United
school football. States to expand protection against the flu to more
Friday nights do not just happen. The blood, sweat
people. Vaccination to prevent influenza is particularly
and tears of spring two-a-days, summer workouts
important for people who are at high risk of serious
and weekly preparation playout with “clear eyes,
complications from influenza. Talk to your healthcare
full hearts, can’t lose” Friday night football games. provider about which one is right for you.
This is why I am excited to see my good friend and
Cheer on your hometown team and support the high
classmate Kevin Womble at the helm here in Holmes
schools,
just remember to wash your hands before you
County. I openly support him as well as all of those
chow down on those boiled peanuts. Go Big Blue!
that are dedicated to the hard work it takes to pull
off Friday Nights. I might yell loudest for my Alma
Mater, but that extends to my surrounding friends and
A man gets this real fast sports car
family in our multi-county community. and he is flying down the road at about
If you want to stay healthy and enjoy those Friday
80 mph. After a couple miles a cop pulls
nights, you’ve got to do all you can to prevent getting
out on to the road and turns on his siren.
sick. Hand washing is still one of the easiest and best
The man pulls over and waits for the
ways to prevent the spread of disease. As I mentioned
officer to give him a ticket. The officer
last month, singing a chorus to a favorite song while
comes up to his car and says “I have been
using a scrubbing motion with soap is effective in rewaiting for you all day”. The man says
moving germs. Flu shots are another recommendation
“Well I got here as fast I could.”
to prevent the spread of influenza. I feel that I need to
Health Talk
Come grow with us.
Call today to schedule an appointment!
(850)547-4440
Patrick Hawkins, MD
Michael Kennedy, ARNP
Family Medicine
Meg Taylor, ARNP
Women’s Health
Worst Library Book
A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library
and with a screaming voice said, “I have a complaint!”
“How can I help you?” said the librarian looking up at
her. “I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!”
Puzzled by her complaint, the librarian asked “What
was wrong with it?” “It had way too many characters
and there was no plot!” said the blonde. The librarian
nodded and said, “Ahhh. So YOU must be the person
who took our phone book.”
Easy Care Lawn & Tree Service, LLC
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Terrorists
A couple of terrorist were making letter bombs.
After they had finished, one said, “Do you think I put
enough explosive in this envelope? “I don’t know,”
said the other. “Open it and see.” “But it will explode.” “Don’t be stupid! It’s not addressed to you!
The older sister rebuked the younger when
putting her to bed for being cross and ill
tempered throughout the day. After she
had been neatly tucked in, the little one
asked, “How come it’s temper when it’s me,
an’ nerves when it’s you?”
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Street Talk America
September 2015 /29
Bonifay’s best
kept secret!
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Church Football
• Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.
• Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin
during worship.
• Halftime - The period between Sunday School and
worship when many choose to leave.
• Benchwarmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work,
or do anything but sit.
• Backfield-in-Motion - Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service.
• Staying in the Pocket - What happens to a lot of
money that should be given to the Lord’s work.
• Two-minute Warning - The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up
your children and belongings.
• Instant Replay - The preacher loses his notes and
falls back on last week’s illustrations.
• Sudden Death - What happens to the attention span
of the congregation if the preacher goes “overtime.”
• Trap - You’re called on to pray and are asleep.
• End Run - Getting out of church quick, without
speaking to any guest or fellow member.
• Flex Defense - The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.
• Halfback Option - The decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for the evening service.
• Blitz - The rush for the restaurants following the
closing prayer.
Ticket must be $25.00 or more.
Expires 9/30/15
Our Patrons Asked....We Answered!
We are expanding
the Mustang Grill!
Our goal is to open the new dining area Nov. 5th!
Tues-Thur 4p.m.-8p.m. • Fri & Sat 4p.m.-8:45p.m.
Closed Sunday & Monday
Come Play in Bonifay!
Florida Springs
RV Park & Campground
www.floridaspringsrvpark.com
Shane & Mary Margaret Obert - Owners
1556 Brickyard Road • Chipley, Florida 32428
850-638-2122 www.obertfuneralhome.com
Your loved ones deserve the best...
Let us assist you in giving them peace of
mind by planning ahead.
The Obert family and staff is committed to meeting your needs by
providing dignified and affordable funeral and cremation services in
a comfortable homelike atmosphere. Obert Funeral Home is fully
licensed through the State of Florida to handle pre-arranged funerals.
We now offer Monuments,
Coping & Cemetery Work.
Mr. (Continued
Curtis’fromClassics
page 7)
Ashton Locke
Pearl ... a 1953 Lincoln Capri!
Pearl is her name and she is a 1953 Lincoln Capri
owned by yours truly. We bought her from my
husband’s grandfather, Alfred Ward. There were
only 23,640 Capri’s assembled in 1953 and were
priced around $3,500 new. She’s moody, some
days she cranks and some days she doesn’t. Pearl
measures 216.6 inches from front to back. No
wonder she’s moody! She’s a big girl!
~Kelley Ward, Publisher, Street Talk America
Do you have a classic car or truck that you’d like to
share with Mr. Curtis and the Street Talk readers?
Send us a picture and any info you’d like included
about your car. STA P.O. Box 170 Vernon, FL 32462
or email streettalkamerica@live.com
Prom & Formal ~ Infant Sessions
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh
words, and slander, as well as all types of
evil behaviour. Instead, be kind to each other,
tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as
God through Christ has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT
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Street Talk America
September 2015 /31
Eating Chocolate
The Oaks
Restaurant
Angus
Beef
Angus Beef
Jumbo
Shrimp
Jumbo Shrimp
Delicious
Buffet
DeliciousSouthern
Southern Buffet
Full
Menu Available
Full Menu Available
Tuesday
Night: Seafood Buffet
Eddie & Jo Davis / LaNita Smith
Thursday Night: Prime Rib
The Oak Station Shopping Center
Highway5:00pm-7:30pm
90 E. • Marianna, FL 32446
(850) 526-1114
Eddie & Jo Davis / LaNita Smith
The Oak Station Shopping Center
Highway 90 East. • Marianna, FL 32446
(850) 526-1114
A 7-year-old is sitting on a park bench eating a chocolate bar. The man sitting next to him looks over and
says, “Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you.”
The boy looks over and responds, “My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five”. The man
replies, “And he ate that much chocolate?” “No” says
the boy, “he minded his own business.”
Saying the Blessing
A family was having some people to dinner. At the
table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter
and said, “Dear, would you like to say the blessing?”
“I wouldn’t know what to say,” replied the little girl,
shyly. “Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie,”
the woman said. Her daughter took a deep breath,
bowed her head, and solemnly said, “Dear Lord, why
did I invite all these people to dinner!?!”
The right to be heard does not
automatically include the right
to be taken seriously.
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699 2nd St. • Chipley, FL
(850) 638-4708
Circle
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Street Talk America
September 2015 /33
Watch Your Mouth...
How many times have you heard that? Said it? I can’t
even begin to remember how many--but I am certain
I’ve been told that as much as I’ve said it. Generally it
starts when our mouths begin to get sassy.
Oh, it doesn’t happen by itself. Our mouths really
don’t have a mind of their own...it operates solely
upon what is generated from the brain. And unless you
are looking in a mirror...you can’t really “watch your
mouth.” But then, that wasn’t the point anyway.
This summer I have had the privilege of loving and
caring for some of our grand children. In most cases,
they were mini-versions of their parents. Not just
their moms. I saw versions of their dads as well--and
I saw the reflection of what they have consumed from
life. When they prayed--oh how sweet!
They are fun, neat, hilarious, and at times right on
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2015 Street Talk America
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target with the surprising things they say. We’ve had a
blast. One thing I have said a time or two,“watch your
mouth.”
Kids pick up words from other kids. I know mine
did. I know I did. They don’t use the vocabulary of
their parents most of the time, it’s their peers. I wonder
at the end of each day, how many times the LORD
has looked at me and wanted to scream, Angie! Watch
your mouth! Instead, The Holy Spirit nudged me
and it was my choice to listen and cease, or keep right
on with my opinion, vocalizing it to the hilltops.
I’ve heard it said, can’t remember where I read it,
so it’s not my quote, “you can’t unsay words.” Good
grief--how true that is! I’ve had my feelings hurt,
I’ve gotten mad, been sad, with a full conversation,
all in my head. And as long as it stays there until I’ve
listened fully to what God has to say on the matter,
I’m okay. But the instant I let words fly out of my lips
without so much as a “test run” with the LORD, I’m
in big trouble. Generally people get hurt. The hearer
as well as the speaker. (Remember “do unto others as
you would have them do unto you?”)
I have said things I’ve had to go back and apologize for. I’ve said “I’m sorry,” more times than
Carter’s got liver pills. But that’s okay. The instant
we think we don’t need to say I’m sorry, or that it
shouldn’t be us saying the I’m sorry, then we are in
a bad way. Spiritually speaking, as well as emotionally and futuristically speaking. (I think I made up
another word!)
Tonight, as one grandson has played a game, I have
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said several times to him,watch your mouth. Meaning,
he has used a silly word that has one meaning to him
(he got from his friends), but it has another meaning in
the dictionary.
As hurtful things have flown through social media,
and from conversations of people, I have to remind
myself, watch your mouth. I need to keep my opinion
to myself. And an opinion cannot be based on one side
of any story. The seeds you sow in words will root out
and spoil good words sown in the past. Rash and sudden decisions based on immediate feelings will often
do more harm in the long run.
I remembered a “rash” decision I made about 20
something years ago, that I made out of hurt feelings. Not taking time to rationalize, or see another
person’s view point--only mine. It was solely from
my perspective that I based my decision--and even
claimed to have prayed about it. Well, funny thing
was, I did pray. I “told God” what He already knew.
However, I didn’t wait to see what He had to say. Instead, I did what soothed my hurt feelings.
I have learned along this almost 54 year journey, that
God wastes nothing. Not even poor decisions, or big
mistakes. He uses every single thing on our journey.
Teaching, training, molding and making us into what
He purposed for our lives. Sometimes, like Moses, it is
a wandering in a desert. For some of us, even as long
as 20-something years.
We assume (incorrectly) that surely “this” must
have needed to take place in order to get me to this
point in life. Are you kidding me? He is GOD after all.
He can change our address in a breath. Just ask Philip
(Acts 8:39-40).
This life on Earth is temporary. We are spiritual beings having an Earthly experience--and what we do
here, affects our eternal. Make it count. (I am speaking to myself as well.) Don’t let words that need to
be said, go unsaid. Words like, “I love you.” “I’m
sorry.” If you are a parent especially listen to my
voice of experience. Always end the night with your
child in “I love you.” It doesn’t matter how hurt or
angry you may be with them, love them. And get their
side of the story, don’t just believe what you were told.
YES, I know they may lie, but listen to the WHOLE
story first. NOT just one side.
These little guys that have been here this summer
have been fun. I’ve listened to two sides to many
verbal tussles. When I wanted to holler at one for being hurtful to the other, waiting paid off. Oh, how I do
love these little guys. I love being a mom, and love
even more being a grandmother. It does keep me on
my toes.
Maybe they learned something this week. Maybe
they learned to watch their mouth. Not looking in a
mirror, but guarding what they say, making sure good
things come from their heart and lips. Teaching kids
to guard their heart, their mouths and minds is more
important now than ever before. They experience far
more of the world by the age of 10 than I had experienced at 15.
While we are teaching, we should also be remembering it for ourselves... Watch our mouth.
© 2015 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.
T&B Hidden Treasures
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Street Talk America
September 2015 /35
Michael
Horton
Roofing
Lic. #RC29027306
Metal & Shingle
Call today for a Free Estimate!
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On the VERGE with BIRGE
Thoughts, puns & fun by robert Birge
• I wish some people’s cardio exercise consisted of
running into traffic.
• Sometimes it takes me a full 8 hours to get nothing
done.
• Just for fun, next time you see a snooty, rich woman
at the grocery store, ask her if she works there.
• Girls must buy $500 purses just to impress other
girls. No guy has ever said “Bro, she was ugly...but
that purse...
• If anyone is interested I’ll be signing books today at
Barnes & Noble from 6:00 pm until I get escorted out
by security.
• Sweetie, if your gonna be two-faced at least make
one of them pretty
• I’ve never watched a clown apply makeup but I
imagine the process is similar to that of a Kardashian.
• I’m thankful for many things, but mostly that there
were no camera phones when I was in high school..
• DID YOU KNOW: If every person on the planet
lined up along the Earth’s equator, most of them
would drown.
• Saying “I’m offended” is basically telling the world
you can’t control your own emotions so everyone else
should do it for you.
• Car alarms should sound like two chicks in a fight.
I’d look out the window for that.
In the doctor’s office, two patients
are talking, “You know, I had an
appendectomy last month and the
doctor left a sponge in me by mistake.”
“A sponge!” exclaims the other, “And do
you feel much pain?” “No pain at all,”
says the first, “but do I get thirsty!”
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Street Talk America
September 2015 /37
Papa Shu’s
Movie Review
the size of an ant. With the help of his genius daughter,
Hope, Dr. Pym recruits and trains Scott to serve as the
next Ant-man. After taking on one of the Avengers it
doesn’t take long for Ant-man to encounter his first suBy: Timothy Shumaker
per villain. The Yellow-jacket, Darren Cross, is Pym’s
Children’s Minister, Gulf Beach Baptist Church
protégée and is definitely out to sell his pirated version
of the Pym particle to the highest bidder. Scott’s moAnt-Man
tives, in contrast, are squarely fixed upon his desire to
Spoiler Alert! If you do not want to know how this movie ends
please stop reading. Movie plots will be revealed!
be a hero in the life of his daughter. Parents will find this superhero movie more idenThe superhero film has already redefined movie
violence for families to such a degree that a number of tifiable than others. There are numerous positive
elements in this film. Scott’s personal troubles give
parents tend to dismiss the impact upon kids because,
an excellent springboard to discuss the relationship
after all, it’s only action. This trend has given rise to a
between choices and consequences. This story of a
plethora of digitally-enhanced movie fury that numb
superhero who starts out as a criminal has a strong
and desensitize the mind. Parents who are concerned
element of redemption. In fact, Dr. Pym tells Scott that
about this rising trend in films are naturally apprehenhe believes “every man deserves a shot at redempsive about the new offering to the Marvel Universe,
tion,” and that their actions aren’t about “saving our
Ant-man. Delightfully, smaller is better. Even though
Ant-man delivers a dose of superhero violence, thank- world, but about saving theirs.” However, there are
negative elements in the film, such as foul language
fully, Marvel tones it down in this flick.
and the tendency to justify criminal actions. Ant-man
Due to a number of foolish decisions, Scott Lang
offers the viewer a superhero that is a little less noble
found life after prison to be somewhat of a struggle.
Even with all his efforts to redeem his life and walk the than others. However, his rough character also seems
straight and narrow, Scott still seemed to get caught up to be more at home in the real world. Scott provides an
in criminal pursuits. However, greed is not his motive, example of fatherly love in contrast to absentee fathers
that plague our day. Parents are cautioned that such
but Scott is ceding to his ex-wife’s demands in hopes
adult, real-world themes are present in this film and it
to get mild visitation rights to his beloved daughter,
Cassie. He uses his skills to break into the residence of is not appropriate for small children. However, bear
in mind that many children today are dealing with the
Dr. Hank Pym and steals an old motorcycle suit from
issues of blended families already.
his safe. The eccentric genius discovered something
Blessings,
called the Pym Particle many years before. The subPapa Shu
stance fuels the suit which reduces the wearer down to BUSH PAINT & SUPPLY
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Street Talk Announcements
Free announcements for Church and Non-Profit
Organizations. Announcements must be mailed to
STA P.O. Box 170 Vernon, FL 32462 or email to
streettalkamerica@live.com.
-Would you like to know God? Would you like to be one
of God’s children? If so, come join us at Grace Lutheran
Church on Sunday 8:15a.m. On Hwy 90 1 1/4 mile east of
Bonifay. Let the Lord touch you with His love.
-Marianna’s Gathering Place Foundation is holding a
monthly meeting for senior singles on the last Friday of
every month at 6p.m. at Eastside Baptist Church Hwy 90E.
in Marianna. Speakers, entertainment and lots of fun. Call
Lilia for more info.850-272-6611
-Free Health Clinic for the uninsured. 203 W. Iowa Ave.
Bonifay, FL. Open on the 1st and 3rd Saturdays of each
month. For more info call 850-510-3779
-Alford Community Health Clinic 1770 Caroline St.
Alford, FL. 2nd & 4th Saturdays starting @ 10a.m. For
more info call 850-272-0101
-Graceville Free Medical Clinic 5470 College Suite 2
Graceville, FL. 3rd & 5th Saturdays starting @ 10a.m. For
more info call 850-263-6912 or 850-272-0101
-Life Recovery Meetings @ First Baptist Church, Bonifay. The Life Recovery Group provides Christ-centered
twelve-step addiction recovery meetings and is certified by
the Florida Department of Children and Family as a Faith
Based Outpatient Recovery Group. Meetings are free and
are offered on Tuesday and Thursday evenings from 5:306:30 at the Annex adjacent to First Baptist Church, Bonifay.
For more info, call (850)547-2420
-The Home Extension Club (HEC) would like to invite
you to a luncheon and meeting at the Hinson Crossroads Fire
Department in Vernon, FL. Come and join us on the third
Tuesday of every month at 10a.m.. For more info call 850-Washington County Council on Aging will begin hosting
BINGO for senior citizens 60 and over, every Thursday 12:30
- 1:30, starting September 3, 2015. Length of play subject
to change depending on participation. For more information
please call Kim @ 850-638-6216.
-Unity Baptist Church will hold Revival September 13th
through the 18th @ 6:30p.m.. All is welcome. Alan English
will be preaching and there will be special music.
Portable Sawmill
Thin kirf bandmill can saw your trees into lumber.
ON YOUR SITE
from all types of hard and soft woods.
• Cypress • Oak • Pine • Cherry
Olen Barfield 638-7105
Vernon High School Class of 1965
To all persons who started with this class: Please join us as
we prepare for a weekend of catching up with each others’
lives. On Friday,Oct. 9, we will ride in the Homecoming
Parade @ 1PM. Meet @ Rhonda’s house, 3344 Jackson
Ave., (by old High school) @ 12 to hop on. That night
@ 7, we’ll enjoy reserved seating at the football game.
At noon on Sat., Oct. 10, we’ll have a covered dish meal
& time of fellowship @ Vernon United Methodist Church
next to the Post Office. Contact Judy Enfinger @
638-7669 or Rhonda Dickinson @ 535-0797 for further
information. Please RSVP for Saturday.
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To start your subscription, fill out this form and mail to
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