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FO ti <'i-v .' ' • t * SURVIVOR Anything for a TV ... APR et cetera page 16 April 5, 2001 Vol. 5 2(i NUMBER COl CMW rocks Toronto 29 Issue 24 ... page 17 etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... Celebs raise funny by Desmond Devoy Sunday's event brought in about cream of Canada's comedy crop was out in full force Sunday night for a funny fundrais- $30,000. The Humber the er for School of Comedy. More than people 1,000 (including a large gang of Comedy students in the upper balconies) filled the Winter Garden Theatre on Yonge with Street for An Evening Funny Canadians, featuring some of the greatest comedians and entertainers this country has The evening was hosted by CBC personality Ralph Benmergui, legends Mike Myers {Austin Powers), tough." In what may have been a mustbe-remembered April Fool's night for the students, Myers invited an Austin Powers impersonator up stage to take his seat, while front row. Once Myers returned to his seat stage, the show began. on Dave Foley and "I love Canada, I love being from Canada," said Myers. Mochrie (Whose Line Is I Anyway?), Robin it's Duke {Saturday Night Live) and Mark Breslin, chief executive of Yuk Yuk's Comedy Club, took to the stage to donate their time and expertise for the fundraiser. (Ron ence to the U.S." alumni), Colin James, from Global TVs sitcom Blackfly joined the cast halfway The profits from the night went to fund scholarships for postgrad- uate in and undergraduate students Comedy Writing and the Performing programs. This pro- gram is one of the most expensive offered at Humber with ma program "I think interesting that all of us talk about being a Canadian in refer- Throughout the rest of the evening, the comics grappled with why Canadians are so and why they have to leave Canada if they want to have a shot the reasons fiinny, at success. Duke through the show.) on Myers took the impersonator's seat in the Kevin McDonald (both Kids in the Hall who welcomed the audience by saying, "If you don't enjoy [the show], ever produced. Comedy money for comedy school said that Canadians are funnier because they are not as reliant on guns and weaponry as think Funny guys Mike Myers, Dave Foley and Colin Mochrie take centre stage at the comedy fundraiser. nice any day. We're nice people." Myers added that, "This country has no real reason to Americans. "I COURTESY if I was packing now, I wouldn't be as funny," she said. Myers said Canadians may have exist. We're the kind of country that was start- ed with a mission statement." Myers also noted that Canada is a very young country, even in com- Here's this guy telling us to fiick off ... Sorry, but Speaking of what makes Canada special, Duke said that ice hockey is like "Canada's army," that a "savage ballet." like is it who moonlights of the Comedy however, a reputation for being nice but told and the audience to "go to a place parison to the U.S., as where there's a war and history started School's Board of Advisors, costing $3,450 I'll take and that, "Our around Trudeau. Breslin, the Cops keep protest, by Kim MacDonald Four Seasons Hotel, Tuesday. rates as Canadian cuisine, ranging from Timbits to grilled cheese to tortiere. See Comedians on page 2 was include all history. 34 It would countries in the Western hemisphere, except Cuba. Many considered this demon- stration to be a practice-run for Organization, and the Multilateral Agreement on Investment. "All of those things are an expression of the corporate agenda trying to exert more control over Hampton. Finance Ministers from across the larger ones planned in Quebec, people's lives," said the Western hemisphere gathered where an estimated 20,000 people "The privatization of health downtown Toronto hotel for a two day conference to prepare for the Summit of the Americas are expected to attend. of education, of electricity, of was meetings in Quebec City Party Leader, at the at Queen's Park gather for a peaceful demonstration. The rest of the cast was able to come to an agreement on what bolstered at it agreement in " by almost double that number of KIM MACDONALD didn't like summit looms About 350 protesters were met police officers outside the chair booed for saying that he hockey. did." the diplo- the postgraduate program $6,700. Protestors he later this Included among the Ontario New protesters, Democratic Howard Hampton. care, water, of environmental protection, and the weakening of labour standards - I believe that a lot of month. The Free Trade Area of the He said the FTAA is a continuation these things should not be subject Americas, (FTAA), which of the agenda that began with free to the market." negotiated at that time, to be the is will be intended most far-reaching trade trade. North American Free Trade Agreement, the World Trade See Protestors on page 5 etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. .etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. 2001 April 5, News cetera Parking problems et by Daniel Russell The Humber Guelph set to campus project, break ground at the end of this year, is going to have iraph- crowded cations for the already parking scene at the college. The new building, due to open of 2003, will remove in tlie fall between 180 and 230 parking is ger," said vice presi- Chopra. sion on the parking issue, there option which would see the col- are several options being consid- lege turn ered. that One option would see the the of parking width in line with the rest on- would have to pave ready to accom- it "The sense some kind of shuttle those service will be from The DANIEL RUSSELL '^a'*'«"9' spots will be harder to find in two years avenues to resolve any parking problems. We've hired a traffic consultant to review the current said situation," Gary Jeynes, director of public safety at the col- are trying to do plan- ning to reduce possible parking less width for a parking space and "That Along with the possible 230 college make arrangements park cars on properties displaced there will also be a neighborhood of the college cur- number of spaces rently is lost while con- going on. "We have to look first of all at parking during construction. We have to look at parking after construction and when we look at parking after construction we the in owned by other parties. "We will then of course have to look at the convenience aspect of whether people can really You know if it's a short minute walk, one would five- say, for have to consider the fact that the year or so disruption maybe number of people coming okay. to this If, on the other hand, a it's it's a Allen's Annie Hall. Dave Foley quoted Allen, who said, "As long as you're doing we said adults' table." Foley then "Which possibility of never you'll probably sit the at added, suits During the question and answer session, one Comedy student from Alberta ("We don't violate to recreational facilities in your comiftunity? "Where do you Speaking of problems with "Toronto," said the Albertan campus from a lot away sheepishly, proving Myers' point. Foley said that Canada After the show, during the dian, Benmurgui Shana Ciampa. because "one of the benefits of Canadian comics shouldn't and time would be the My classes are scat- through out the day and I no [job] prospects having in United States. "What's wrong is you work at what you want to do without worrying with going and seeing about getting a job." on the biggest stage on earth?" Canada said. "I Foley often worked for free at Benmurgui, himself a former me a Yuk Yuks and never thought he'd newsman, said that the Canadian media is obsessed with Canadian Building a parking structure make a go of comedy as a career, thinking he would do it for a while it if they gave great price," on campus talent heading south, but once a but and "then get a real job." There big news department in the States would be an expensive venture for was a hint of scandal however the college. when them a call, they travel off to America without a second "If we college is a possibility are going to have this go up from the current 9,000 [roughly] full-time students to 13,000 - 14,000, we to will have clearly look at options," said Chopra. all it was revealed was Mochrie that Colin not actually gives thought. When Canadian. "No, I'm Scottish," said Mochrie, as the audience collective let out a gasp of mock shock. "Oh, wait. That qualifies as LOCAL M HEROES it installing basketball nets in an if teaching at the Humber School Comedy, once their careers of were Canadian," said Foley, coming over, none gave a straight answer, quickly to the rescue. as they were laughing too hard. Laughing, McDonald asked, right for me to come and when I'm washed up? I see Canada from Scotland and settled in a francophone section of "Is Montreal, where Mochrie claims they don't teach people "My accent was beaten out of me." To this day, Mochrie is not Humber." MOLSON able to even fake a it all teach happen! unused parking lot, skills at taught comedy Scottish workshops in the U.S. but when came questioned later, Duke has she referred this from the United Kingdom, as did reporter to her publicist. Kevin McDonald's. rumored that the School has been seeking Foley as Asked about influences, that their comedic the comics agreed all Wayne and Schuster (who appeared more times than any has Comedy professor for some time. Ryan Horwood, first-year a building rink boards for an outdoor skating rink or adding fencing other act on the Comedy student (and Mike Myers to a baseball field, Molson wants to be there to help out! Show) were big, fan) enjoyed the evening "It was call, 1-800-MOLSON Ed Sullivan as were the SCTV a It been also gang. like The evening was interspersed 1. with classic Canadian video chps from the past 50 years, highlight- Application Deadline: IHarch 30, 2001 ed by the likes of Jim Carrey, Norm McDonald, and great the late, much coaxing from the audience, the comics relented and etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. News etc... etc. etc... etc... etc. an awakening.. .It etc. made you people aren't realize that these any different than you. They worked hard, perfected their craft ... and it paid off." "It was a nice surprise to have Ron James John Candy. After etc. asked by the Et Cetera any of the comics would consider .it. a For an application etc... etc. how you do between classes," she ^/<- etc. feel afraid to try out their craft in the in program where Molson provides funding revamp or revitalize existing adult sport and recreational facilities in the community. it's why on touched home to individuals of legal drinking age to repair, Whether Ralph conference, wouldn't be able to go The Molson Local Heroes Program can help make is now?" live asked Myers. [Allen] well." accent. Foley's parents also Local Heroes why almost all in and around Toronto. him Mochrie's parents came to Do you hare a great idea that vfill make a difference cows") asked Canadian comedy centres press walk from those properties to the college. • Woody for the Devil's Advocate.) breaking out as a Canadian come- would only do to spaces that will be permanently won an worked so well as a breeding comedic talent for main issues. Another option would see the issues." time a comedy where most of ground tered said Chopra. last there," parking "Safety may give us some relief," The is Computer Engineering student the college would just be moving to a standard. comedy sketch could Kevin McDonald have played God, Ron James the Devil and Mike Myers comedy, from the college doesn't appeal to Other parts of the city require Duke with being a comedian for routine, which having to be shuttled to the issue. all the stars got their start Only in a park if Chopra. replaced. struction we is have to provide will "We're looking at business, one of the problems Oscar for Best Picture was in 1977 modate parking. The question of how and where it will happen is the performed an impromptu improv seriously." college the land to get of Toronto. Continued from page one Even though comedy is a serious The noted spaces "We Plate that Bridgeford lege. third was that "No one takes comedy at the college. however, Queens Humber out parking lot for the North campus. tor of Capital Develop- ment would be a (behind J.J.Q.'s) into a Circle spaces, thus bringing the college said a sbc-acre piece of land owns it buses," shuttle Shuttle buses col- reduce yet," said Bruce Bridgeford, direc- need to Chopra noted that while the college has not made a final deci- parking lot capacity. plans we provide lege apply to the city of Toronto to site whether or not look at to dent of administration. spaces from the college's total "We haven't done the we may have longer walk then getting bigger and big- Dev Chopra, Comedians help will increase Blackfly) there. ing him," (from We Horwood the sitcom weren't expectsaid. etc... etc... etc... etc. etc. April wants unity Pulla by Kitn MacDonald Don't at if there's some dancing on the ceiling HSF office come May. John the who Pulla, is May dead or figures, would most fact, among the histor- he includes him ical 2001, admits i a Lionel Richie fan. In alive, that he meet. like to For tion. this reason, he plans to some look into regarding cies HSF takes over as president on he pursuing a post-secondary educa- be surprised "OSAP "Money something always an issue for stu- is I'm going to try to some- dents. how work for make it easier." was young," said I list LOCO. Initially he student group as an president of saw this opportunity to unite latinos in "We try to do things to The make community appreciates the humility he Murdoch concluded He plans what "That's about both like I Pulla HSFs new pres. is humble people. Di wasn't a per- who son everything that Mother like I Teresa stood for. she lived her life, like the I way respecting oth- At 26 years Humber sary to lead would do unto others as you to is 'try like them do to to home Pulla lives at at odd jobs before making the His experience in the you'. with his world' should help prepare and their two daughters. president. first mem- that he Canada. tion. Finch Street lives at to wanted never thought would I return to school," said Pulla. understanding of issues affecting kept working and working. After community. He a considers himself blessed to be able to live at home while little more while, I realized potential. everything I The had accomplished Pulla under- just started catching stands that other Humber started dents are not so lucky, money and that one of the primary is obstacles facing people who are The have a lot I realization of going to school. stu- "I waking up a up to me. I all fi( lation states PVDIVIREO K^tr *"iidvj Amwo; ):»dy J;; C;'j>i.'S j;r,- A't^mni ftytfrmt v.w»v>l>M>u>uUget by ititminatf to be caught. SSOO.OUmvuh www.aboutstudeiit.cuni Ads posted around the school rized paper, note that "Where a student another student, that's pretty clear the that the student because, "a college site partly Liberal Arts feelings and views by their words." They claim their essay writing as successful. now incorporated," "Each day they're get- ting stronger. I hope what has already been started." After his term as president over, Pulla hopes to his own project is one day open to "help students with is their writing skills." HSF's marketing and commu- can add to I you'll know where to When the issue removed get a zero ment. If it's on that assign- not a first offence, student could be looking "I was brought Murdoch the ads to personally from the HSF think [these Web okay but only to see a at sus- sites] how are people write, their style," said Jennifer Luis, a first-year Package and Design student. Hanft admitted that she hasn't boards. Since these ads have been gally posted go. "At the very least, a student would ads were being posted. his attention, Lionel Richie or Tito Puentes, Humber. pension or even expulsion," she walked around the campus and ever of the and Sciences Division explained. that these experience should help him with if you're wrong," it's Murdoch was not aware restaurant. His business the future, at knows Pamela Hanft, dean nications co-ordinator, Stephen this. in buys dent.com said that they created a strong ability to express their is wilfully a paper or takes a paper from has done a great job as president "HSF the wwrw.aboutstu- of said to be just takes offence very seriously. or university student should have and he hopes worthwhile to is it Humber Toby Warnell this year, who may be For those students considering submitting a plagia- campus. believes that requires means of posting material." The unknown culprit remains & Rasaarch Papar In an e-mailed response, the He HSF "The regu- first only the use of staples and tacks as !>J;';' t.'id.; imr. nur developers So at ACCUMMOUATIOn students and looking for a restaurant that plays program • OTHF.RJ... > IM a know to build a history. Administration rQWPMtNT said. Humber's In fact, according to Posting Policy, the very the Pulla enrolled in the Business is • JOS.S be personally involved with the students on little bit." rest as they say, want in also wants to said Pulla. "I CAK Mrsjc Fra* Essay HSF." an educa- to get and Kipling Avenue, so he has an this bridge between of his duties as with forcing him to realize ing, ber of his family to be born in He now some 'real him He credits his time spent work- His parents are originally from the > lines of dark because they don't He decision to return to school. deal with is three years working niRNiTtHi:* • • <;*.«»: keep the "Many students are kept I • • heard by the HSF," said Pulla. their rights. parents, his sister, her husband, Ecuador, and he College stu- dents. He spent Pulla said his personal philoso- old, Pulla believes he possesses the maturity neces- ers." phy • "Students need their voices put herself on a pedestal. SOmVAKE .»PrU.VNtKS • IVIOIIS communication open when he comes into power. AMYWHITnNGHA.M were of them," said Pulla. 'They COMJ-UIi:!! r\ntt one of the major to • . HSF staff. "We don't use tape," he "We only use staples." all president of HSF. Princess Diana possessed. boards by anyone on his Frm Local Studant Cluiifisds T»:XTB0OKS that they hadn't been placed on the vyww.aboutstudent.coin reasons Pulla decided to run for Mother Teresa and of the www.aboutstu- poles around the college. students together as a is Some site dent.com ads were found taped to • Ri-;SEARCII life. pose of passing them off as origi- offers free local student classifieds • and his passion for in nals. According to the ad, this regardless of their background. bringing Murdoch that," said www.aboutstudent.com. are of posting them? don't want to be free research papers for the pur- papers. idea is we 64 HSF poster boards, you might have noticed an ad for the Web site as well as free essays and research This - who regards to helping students find He adds that every student at Humber is invited to join LOCO, Humber believes both promoting unite everyone." Pulla is "Obviously, walked past one of the me admires Puentes' love of music He question at Humber College. If you've concept but the idea was to just latin, by Melanie Butera Someone's been naughty the school. was musician Tito Puentes, Princess Diana, and Mother Teresa. currently the vice- is Free essays available for students on Web Organization Cultural body," said Pulla. Pulla. Also included on this In his second everyone happy and unite every- grew up listening to his music, and I associate him with morals that were instilled in College. he became involved with the LatinO the students to "I when Humber year, (LOCO). He look into," said Pulla. will I of the current poli- OSAP loans. definitely is Humber at 2001 5, on HSF ille- boards, the had many students who have been caught plagiarizing recently. Garbage, garbage, everywhere at the bus stop by Lama Nicolas It's want to to do college nobody seems a dirty job, but is not part of school prop- The City of Toronto is respon- Humber College Boulevard, stumay have noticed the silver dents garbage bins on the side- walk, beside the bus stops that are cill the bins located inside the cam- pus. This is done on a daily basis. don't think emptied. it's I first-year Humber student. Office at Facilities Humber Mike Preikleous, co-coordina- removal from 201 and 203 Humber College Blvd. - tor of contracted services at the the student residence. part in the process. bins free of charge, making money through advertising sales. Humber hires which are contractors The Hurley Corporation located outside to from empty ty. Since still Humber buildings, Humber proper- on two OMG bins are located on the sidewalks beside the bus part are Blvd., silver bins in question of the 205 main campus Humber and therefore fall College According to Victor operations manager at company sends its own City of Toronto explained their problem inspect the site. According to Preikleous, many the people out exterior surface of the two boxes. "We responsible up The for hiring contractors to clean garbage on school property. bin by the bus stop in front of the etc... the outside of the box, L.\M.\ Garbage etc... etc... NICOLAS bins at the bus stop in front of Humber are overflowing. etc... etc. etc. etc... etc... News sure it's we make not damaged, and that looks clean," said Abedi. etc... etc... etc... "If it we sim- from an item blocking the opening of the bin. "The bins are only scheduled for are only responsible for is ply caused by large items or every two weeks to maintain the Management Whenever, a reported, the city sends times the overflow problem Abedi, OMG, is out a Waste Control Officer to under the City of Toronto's jurisdiction. Law Clerk makes etc... etc... etc... etc... The two address, "It is we Etobicoke, they are only responsi- look really trashy." The notice any garbage overflow, contact the city." ble for waste always been like that," said program According to city. people keep up any garbage bins always take the bus, and Kim Walsh, a become the responsi- of the Humber's grounds maintenance ever been it's bility maintenance. overflowing with garbage. "I stops, they OMG Media installed the silver sible for its it. While waiting for the bus on OMG erty. once a week collection," he "The waste control officer said. ensured me that he will be visiting the location soon to litter bin is make sure the emptied." etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. etc... April 2001 5, riders face fare hike Safety programs TTC by Nadia Ranieri umber students who take H way" "the better have to will deeper into their pock- dig a little ets if they want to continue using the TTC. Toronto's that the city subsidize of its has council city the TTC's plea asking rejected 20 per cent operating budget, a percent- $27 age equivalent to million dol- If approved, fare increases will be effective as soon as June 1. The TTC and Toronto's Budget Committee will come to a decision by the end of this month. "If you raise things too high, you lose ridership, but they'll eventually come back," said Bolton. "A dime is appropriate. Most people would accept this." result, TTC take the toonie and a dime, ridiculous." it's "Students definitely won't be happy," said Toby Warnell, HSF president. a budget crisis and some- "It's of this." hit with all TTC Warnell admits to using the will have- to raise their fares but said he will have to rethink bringing the cost this by ten cents, up from $2 for a "We need to obtain a certain number of dollars to compensate gap for the Marilyn TTC Bolton, Relations low- targeting people," who use the we obvi- said Guild. "People bus are struggling and Public TTC "The Director. are unemployed income, funding," said in once fares are increased. "They regular fare to $2.10. TTC riders protect bus all the time and it's hard to get a toonie and now I'll have to find a one has to be As a " I Advertising student. to Tara Guild, *rhat's crazy," said a second-year Graphic Design and But not everyone has been so lars. implemented accepting, especially students. by Janet Gibson Humber Rear doors College students and staff are protected from peril by two safety features as they travel to and from the school, rptrc bus drivers stop will JL "between stops" for female "If a woman was exiting and a man was behind her looking as if he was going to follow her "We would cial "In theory, if you're able to we wouldn't well then wouldn't let her off,"- stop. off, We Bolton said. contact a transit spe- constable or the police and they would meet her." TTC it has 67 sworn special conwho have the powers of a officer on or in relation to ously don't have takes you to get from the bus to stables car. wherever you happen to be going. police money to buy a This could make a huge dif- off the bus. or workplace. reduce the time or distance that closed them that no one can follow between 9 p.m. and 5 a.m. so that they can exit the bus closer to their home riders travelling alone remain while riders exit at the front so ference between taking the bus changes need to generate subsidy NADIAR-^NIERI and not taking the bus." that the city isn't giving us." Riding the bus will cost more. Phone scam could leave you owing thousands of dollars by Kris Kauk can be left with the bill but with no Many means of capturing the con of us have been victims some type of fraudulent of one point activity at Few life. though have been of us warned our in advance. in artist. Jack Moore, a customer service sumers. "There anyone really is at representative at Bell Canada has just call a client heard of this relatively recent test scam and said. offers this advice to con- no reason for company to up and request to the phone your line over the phone," he "The only reason we would In the information age, fraud test warnings are easy to receive. For the line would be on the cus- example, e-mail forwards that tomer's specific request, other- inform a large group of people are wise now common place. Anyone with an e-mail account knows of these types of messages. of emergencies like Many people find distinguish which real ages," said "If hard to it One message Alert-Tell entitled your passed to Candice Cvar, a was first- phone be on the lookout for a to group of people from test to AT&T do is push 9, reality to com- is, is no desire to to deal to be on combi- Beware of phony phone calls. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. etc. raised concerns that seem polite. Just hang up," Phone-Busters at 1-888-495- 8501 or their local police investi- stop program." it Scarborough, the out across the city to - TTC Marilyn Bolton basically for "It's but all it 144 bus women only at the discretion of the it's driver," a TTC spokesperson man with a broken foot the driv- er would ..let you off at mid-block from the campus pay phone: 416-675-8500. Off-campus, the number campus ext. or is 4077 for North ext. 3240 for Lakeshore campus. A customer service representative or security guard will respond 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Information on request stop too." Riders must tell the driver one stop ahead of where they want to get off and the driver to stop safely. etc... etc. Students or staff can place a free call 416-675-6622 options are available to them. News "Ifyou were a man with a broken foot the diiver would ... let you off at mid-block too." ty. gation bureau to find out what etc... etc... etc... safe- we Marilyn Bolton said. "If you were form of fraud or any other Pinson, number's manager of public hadn't implemented a request calls show inter- tact etc... SWAN (or vice versa) Nancy explained transit. routes. ing gains complete access to your KAUK bus stops and he explained. this KRIS at so effective they rolled type of phone fraud should con- make long distance calls. The unsuspecting consumer "We looked women's safety on surface found nation of buttons the person call- account and uses the number to active," Fice said. phone is offering something too good to be true, it always is," Anyone who has experienced this Scarborough rapist was in person on the other end he added. line for anything. and the city of Scarborough about the time the 1991 months est to test did a major security study After testing the plan for two completely, don't even the individual on When you do push way "Disregard these type of Cvar added. the other end has your you have o and # Regional of the and that they want to plete the test," The saying they are line. All "We with the Scarborough picious. "If the your phone at Peel with these problems explained. call by phoning the college ahead, Const. Jim Rutz of the guard when something seems sus- long distance phone scam," she "People it. have been scam and others door the TTC. in call request an escort from the street to the college police Police said the best run a trj'ing to Fice, super- TTC property. Humber students and staff can intendent of system security for added. notified of this has a Linda activity," said such as Bell or AT&T to verify," he Fraud division that for risk of sexual assault or other criminal that person's place of employment like anyone and asks then you're reducing the take advantage of TTC safety programs. Women's Action Network (SWAN), the "The message was basically a to out- Female passengers can of information, request Humber college. warning calls Peel Regional Police year Travel and Tourism student at power Moore. an identification number and "Bell folks" test the lines in case someone this type messages are and which are hoaxes. Canada we only JANET GIBSON etc. must be able and other safety measures provided by the TTC can be found on the TTC Web site: www.city.toron- to.on.ca/ttc/safety.htm. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. April 5, FTAA still stumbling block by Ryan McLaren Atandthe end of are April, protesters Quebec clash in Summit City where the of the Americas plans to discuss the Free Trade Area of the prosperity in the Americas." This ronmental protection." the tariffs FTAA is and with duties. approved, it 800 There is a concern that busi- The summit discuss three will themes, with a number of ent topics under each theme. FTAA the differ. being at 'rights' to the for every publicly funded service ministers foreign (like the from health care and education countries the at acknowledged that it getting are significant "In to Organization of America States those nations that have all emment jgov- Humber's regarding 2001/2002 operating week and realizing human potential. The FTAA falls under creating prosperity, and is only one of more than 20 proposed topics of The FTAA discussion. say there should be The FTAA is very similar to the North America Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA), but bigger; it's NAFTA for the Western Hemisphere (except Cuba). The Quebec government calls of what said, the will poor are get- be a better situa- Studies and member of Humber's budgetary committee said that at this point the focus is on reducing exists. now we're at the phase of how can we get that number down and what kinds of things can we change," said Hanna. "We have to go through the examination of where we are, where we want to go and how we sequence it when we do it, to get that number down." Hanna added, "I think we can get [the projected deficit] down substantially, way dovra." "Right full disclosure going on behind the closed doors of the Americas meetings. Summit of They said "the world of international trade can no longer be the exclusive domain MATTHEW SEN'ERI.N' of sheltered elites, trade bureaucrats and corporate power brokers." to fight. Acting President of the Faculty Protesters gather for peaceful rally continued ft'om page one A rally was held march before the Seasons. Many Mark Queen's Park at to the Four students attended the event. Scott Morrison, a 23-year-old Farrugia, a 26-year-old systems administrator agreed He went as far as with Marquardt. trouble. bet "I all these people would they had stock options," said ment have a lot to lose if this deal means there if the college any part, "I think down substantially, way down." -William cerned when the problems were explained to them. Post-grad Internet Management student Derek Martin said he came to Humber because of the high level of technology that here," said Morrison. "If that hap- of a 60 hour work week, and cuts pens, tuitions will be raised. Also, to education care about the environment. Upon I think this will lead to the lowering of environmental standards to attract business." Not all that attended were in Sandy Marquardt, a 28-year-old who works in the area, came by to see opposition to the FTAA. ifthere would be any violence. sity call in case they had any gave us the employable, so skills "I disagree with said Marquardt. communism," "It's a capitalist government that takes care of people. If these anywhere else, is Despite this, there were no its that the job market is look- "If we're using last year's technol- ogy right now, then when we're in the job market in the next 10 a year behind," he said. to be An IT diploma opens up a world of opportunity for growth and success. you've Hliether peaceful. a got Bachelor's degree, or j college diplu- can make yoii with il De\ the count rv Technolog)' Diploma, designed tor tur more Iiiturinalion a one year post- students is specifi- who do not have a technical background. Computers. Networking. The World Wide Web: Tuday, these are the basic tools ot business. With the Bloor Street DeVry Intonnation Technolog\- program, \T)U learn the basics sional experience, you'll and more. you learn how ness problems. And. \i)u"ll be able to apply to In to apply coursework presented by teachers with profes- computing technolop> wur there's no reason to stop short of a peaceful demonstra- wide range of busi- IT areas, which mdiistnes. The more competitive business becomes, the more sional potential. to a gain a broad-based exptisure to a \ariet> ot many different Technology becomes. With choice ot convenient d;iy impttrtant Inlortnalion or evening/weekend classes, wur pn)tcs- Let DeVry prepare WWW.tOf. you for this exciting new world. Hampton. "The chance i There'll be no stopping you. to exercise A higher degree of success® freedom of expression and freedom of speech. To meet with this kind of intimidating people were living police presence they wouldn't be top." allowed to protest." etc. 'This be to skills we hope to get the ing for right now," said Martin. problems, and the day remained timetre plastic rounds. tion," said didn't feel like univer- police officers, and Avenue Road, the protesters were met by an impenetrable vyall of police, some brought in from as far away as Barrie. They wore riot gear, and were armed with automatic weapons that shoot 15 cen- He supports capitalism. at my program who "Everyone in came here and healthcare. arrival it offered. the Harris government, the possibility I became con- troubles, but et baccalaureate program that private universities Hanna Cetera had not heard of the budg- cally may soon be we can get that [the projected deficit] months, we're already going however, the denouncing not planning to do Union, Paul Michaud, expressed enthusiastically sang along chants is I at this point layoffs as a result of that dis- iiia, For the most with have to assume that similar concern, but said that Farrugia. crowd "This agreement fast or anything, so deficit], layoffs attendance about the and gave them emergency num- smokers.' mental management major said goes through. in numbers of bers to change their tune pretty and the environ- large to call the protesters 'hippie pot University of Toronto environ- that students those not been approached by the college about any results that would happen out of [the Students questioned by Et William Hanna, dean of Media the current $9 million estimate. is school year. that the tion for those than what currently Those who oppose the FTAA any changes for the 2001/2002 grant. month or two." trade, free last crisis is just union has not been informed of has not released infor- from the government "in the McMahon Protesters ready budget since the provincial next adopted of speculation, and that the lot cussion," said Michaud. tion countries that those all now the budget a The report was prepared using figures from the 2000/2001 material well-being." ting poorer or staying the same. the collective effort to promote of board expects to receive informa- In "the leading element in Board poor have experienced improved ing democracy, creating prosperi- FTAA monthly Chopra said haven't the the adopted a market perspective, the (OAS) General Assembly in Windsor in 2000. Those themes are strengthenty, Dev Chopra, report presented by mation improvements." provided by governments - now involved poor challenge and compete Canada's Pierre Pettigrew) from of the Fraser might happen, but he said "the new unequalled corporations These themes were decided on by left the 2001/2002 pre-budget status Governors meeting. McMahon Fred will "give transnational deficit right ^e've $9 million budget was forecast last week in potential vice-president of administration, Institute find effective solutions. A the deal, while the poor are Council of Canadians (COC) says common problems and cuss of will each year. FTAA the it's become a priority over nesses democracy and human rights. They say the rich will profit from further behind. to dis- is is their citizens and the environment they share." million GDP with caution because about the situation. purpose of the meetings So why trillion Humber's potential budget crisis and well-being of will protested? Those who oppose the FTAA say it will grant too much power to corporations. The more than $11 regu- to stiH too early to feel distressed people with a total gross the in and by Alexis Zgwi responded Faculty lation protecting the health, safety from every Western Hemisphere (except Cuba). The officials country could remove create or maintain laws trade zone, affecting the gathering of the highest gov- "it the ability of every government to and restrictions create the world's largest free is said Budgetary blues envi- ment If The Summit of the Americas The COC trade with and other countries without govern- decreased Americas (FTAA). ernment social security, culture means companies can expected to police economic growth and expand 2001 Protest etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... is way over organizers the warned etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. KIM MACDONALD Mississauga Campus 5860 Cbedworth Way Mississauga, Ontario LSR 3W3 Ibronto (Scarborough) Campus 670 Progress Avenue Ibronto, Ontario MIH 3A4 (905) 501-8000 (416) 289-3642 Riot police ready for trouble. etc. News etc... etc... etc. etc. etc. etc. etc... etc. etc. etc... etc. April 5, 2001 On Campus cetera et Teaching safe drinking practices by Dave Ward Spring is hiere to educate students about safe drinking practices. - a popular time for vacations, "¥ouT Canadians die and 125 are injured every day by Edie Newton, spokesperson for Canadians for Safe and good Sober Driving, said moods, and a popular time to drink. Alcohol awareness injury caused groups are working with Canadian universities and colleges its mandate by impaired driving, is to reduce death and through education. impaired drivers," she said. Newton said spring is a peak time of the year for alcohol related incidences, especially those involving students. Steven Murdoch, HSF communications co-ordinator, agrees that greater measures should be taken this time of year. "I'm surprised there aren't more police spot checks Thursday nights - everybody knows Thursday is on a popu- bar night on college campuses," he said. lar Humber College has held several alcohol awareness Humber, in conand the Toronto Police, events this year. Earlier this semester, junction with Bacardi, the OPP, put on a series of events to help educate students all about alcohol awareness. Non-alcoholic drinks called "mock-tails" were served, and there were guest speakers, BIG DAYS 2 FRI. & APRIL raffles & prizes, and even free courses how to on Smart Serve, serve alcohol responsi- bly. SAT. 6* and a course that teaches you " Four Canadians die and 125 are injured every day by impaired drivers," 7*»^ Edie Newton - 9:00am-9:00pm Other departments alcohol awareness. Humber are also contributing to at The SAACnet lab screen savers have been changed to deliver an alcohol awareness message. The student handbook has one-liners to remind students about the potential hazards of drinking, such as, "desig- nate a driver before you go out tonight." The Humber residence also takes precautions with regards to students drinking. Peter Lem, residence co-ordinator, said a student year for an alcohol related-offence. this "Those most are life was evicted from residence death or injury at risk to alcohol-related between the ages of 18 and 22, especially women," he said. Lem said Thursday night-pub night problems arise, is usually with vandalism being the most when common occurrence. "If we know it's going to be a busy night and there are a lot of people drinking, we'll open up the cafeteria, serve food and play music - give people a chance to wind dovm," he said. Jen Guy, director of Bacchus, a department of the Student Life Education Company, said they also try to turn the negative into the positive. "We're not trying to scare students with demonstra- where we bring a car into the school, crash it, a cofout the back with a mirror in it so students can picture themselves dead. These types of scare tactics are not effective. We prefer dialogue and interaction with the students - it's much more effective," she said. tions EVERYTHING! fin falls FRESH MERCHANDISE EACH DAY! THAT'S NO YOLK! Guy I said Bacchus is working more to change the per- ception of students surrounding the subject of social drinking. "We hand out surveys asking students questions about alcohol and the social aspects ask students to estimate etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... 27 etc... etc... etc... & etc... We how than they thought. We hope this information relieves some of the social pressure. Perception and social stigmas have a lot to do with it. Students are actually a lot less Finch etc... etc. they drink and much their peers drink. Students are always surprised when we tell them their peers are actually drinking way yalueVlllage Hwy surrounding alcohol. how much healthier than they think," she said. On Campus etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. etc. etc. etc... 2O01 April 5, way Serving up a drink the smart by Elizabeth Bower summer job in the bartending/restaurant industry should take a Smart Serve certification course to not only improve their Caldi warned that March. 26. looking for a Students employment Mirella Caldi, food and bever- age services instructor, told Smart Serve Humber night class a at that serving a customer to the point of intoxication possible it's people to intentionally get for over-ser\'ed, injure themselves, and then sue the server thou- for 'Taking your customers. in you need how how offers tips on you don't to also It make sure an intoxicated cus- let $35 and involves a costs said. tiple-choice quiz. Servers are sent A recent Vancouver court case highlighted the growing trend of make the courts to others liable Smart just jail, role she alcohol they had it takes to intoxicate man and woman and the average Grass nature. school year now on is at Lakeshore campus. The play, Lion tive, and It is very provoca- explicit, sexually, other ways," said Schoenberg. in the Streets by Judith Thompson, is a drama about a girl named Isobel who A cast of seven students take on 25 roles at the Theatre Humber Studio Lakeshore 3131 at explores the secret lives of her Boulevard West in the neighbours while searching for ing. her Thompson won the Floyd S. Chalmers Canadian Play Award Mark director, Lion in the Streets. Schoenberg, faculty described the play as "a it takes place in the real world and dreams and it takes it mindscape." etc... etc. build- takes place Humber Theatre box office. The cost and students, and $5 for children 12 and under. in place in Show times are at April 4-7, 10-12, 14, 8 p.m. from and at 2 p.m. afternoon, wiping People are usually shocked to learn that servers are their though it is the Oscar Valencia, Humber Smart Serve course certifica- He tion for his bartending job. said he felt safer within his job after learning the legalities. "I feel more confident now be able to cut people I off, to now that know the consequences," he said. rant in Barrie, Ontario, said that Humber College offers two more smart sei-ve training programs on May 14 and June 18. she always looks for Smart Serve on a resume. had no idea I could be fined $100, 000." claims one acre but keep it from spreading." Being the second grass kind in as many fire of days, Capt. About ten men hosed down and the burning land until the fire was completely under control by about 6:05 p.m. No one trees was hurt in the fire, ing sooty mess. tors. Capt. Taylor said the exact cause of the fire is unknown, but but about an acre of grass, shrubbery and small trees apartment York a because he needed the conditions were contributing fac- Crowds from who com- University student, attended the Taylor said the wind and the dry them of customer who mits any crime, she said. a about 5:40 p.m. yesterday after liable for customer's actions, even "I and and of two fire trucks they're owner said. Ann Fancy, owner of Fancy's Seafood restau- rant its first It was reduced seems were hurt to a smoulder- as though no wildlife in the fire either. Capt. the near- could have been caused by any- Taylor said nearly no one was 30 thing from a carelessly thrown cig- the area on their arrival, and the match- only thing they encountered was a or even just a reflecting piece of lone herd of field mice making a building at Humberline Drive gathered to arette to kids playing with watch the huge clouds of smoke es, from a distance while glass. firefighters in hasty departure. under control. Resident Jeremy Park noticed a strange smell, and came down got the situation a for closer look after flames and smoke from his seeing apart- ment window. was said. 'The and yet my looked out there spreading much so fire window and smoke," Park trucks weren't here looked it like it was really fast." Captain Bob Taylor of Toronto fire station 413 said this was the second grass For information or to make "There 416-675-6622 when we reservations who know what water pumper arrived on the scene The don't hire the fire he had respond- ed to in two days. April 7, 8, 14." ext. 3421. etc. $12 for adults, $8 is can get you a job, a Barrie restau- lines to "I for seniors combination of realism and surrealism, 'L' Tickets are available from the killer. in 1991 for and in certification Wednesday by human Smart Serve service. I I'll doing." issues surrounding alcohol through the West Arboretum the event. ment's last production of the Regardless of the legal and ethical late a 911 call at 5:30 alerted an exploration of the and the most ugly side of driving, but A at "It's and brooms to control it, when some of the trees started on fire we made the decision to lay quickly small trees. darker, and no, they're not get- using grass spread fire need that headache, so "A grass out about an acre of shrubbery depart- very slack," she said. not self-serve, that's for sure." fire by Kim Sinclair by Sarah Robson The Humber Theatre is of servers are just there for the ting into the cars her employ- argued Smart Serve teaches you how play of year Ontario It's much last "Responsible alcohol service in who's serving the people who are? because over- a customer gets in an acci- orders the drinks and Linda Hunt from Barrie, Ontario, offered. Humber presents drunk driving following a 1994 Christmas party, refused the cab ride they BOWER Ontario's in gratuities should have stopped her from driving home - even though she ELIZABETH about servers and problem, Caldi said. been asleep throughout the party. ers serves up a pint at Caps also is it lot won $300,000 from Jeff Wiseman not is if dent on the way home. about keeping yourself out of on the way home. The parents had another high-profile case, bucks ones Serve, however, bartenders acknowledging their another teenager who was serious- In mark above 95 per cent. The parents of two teenagers, who held a party at their home in Enderby B.C., were ordered to pay part of a $2.5 million award to injured in a drunk-driving crash about a week later if they received a actions. ly in certification papers another person's drunken for they've laws) and can get charged big culminating and know to ones aren't always aware (of the avoid any nasty court cases," she responsibly brains a 25-question mul- serve completely sober. alcohol she said. tape and workbook with exercises, customer's actions until they are Humber instructor said Monday, to es," served someone, but the younger $100,000 for over serving alcohol, a of Serve with the younger waitress- lecture, video- the server liable for all of their particularly value Smart I 'The experienced ones have the chances, but to avoid fines of up to is value experience the most, "I but the premises. The three-hour course course gives you this the knowledge for tomer leave sands of dollars. means the physical warning signs to look call was first Taylor said. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... smoke intense arrived," "Originally Capt. we were On Campus KJMSINCUIR One acre of the West Arboretum smoulders in a grass fire etc. etc. etc... etc... . etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. April 5, 2001 8 our hearts, something that anyone can find, it's a pleasure when you give so amazing to receive. All that you want to know is "Love Editorial cetera is a treasure in where to start." et -Lascelles Beckford made Protesters' point already What would happen held if they nobody and protest a Guinness pint and been the showed up? If way There's really only one find out, and if to the masses of stu- dents, activists, and concerned both Summit club-swingers on Tuesday look Because of Americas. job is done. expecting, Throw occasion, Is garbage In case Humber? in front of Anyone can a pile of Toronto anyone has missed the overflowing metal garbage bins is not keeping up with job their see that the City of even compound, while shut ing the people garbage bins. why Humber has located near the bus stops in front as called the city Fortunately, for dents the metal bins tion as the stu- inside the same are not in the sciiool agreed new the to and littered After com- a investigating it was Throw a few grey beards and a giant tracted inside empty the bins and on campus property. staff to But the over flowing bins on the complaints are then Ser\'ices, Officer the is a filed disruption than any bandana- waving The whole point sent to check out the bin. mouth of the bin is just pushed is inside and the officer goes home. If to the bin is full, empty the someone is called bins. Local residents have already filed eering, in Humber When complaints about the growing fees of starts throw to their is "Don't quit your day job." But more than that, affirmafrom some truly major a school that raised thing welcoming us few eyebrows when first Hollywood players such as Myers and Dave Foley is encouraging for Alison Taylor Mark Bennett Sports Editor Sean O'Hara Steve Chester Editorial Advisors Entertainment Editors Katherine Jackson Deslyn Diaram Editors At Large Terri Arnott Chad Heard Ben Forbes Publisher Jenn Cochrane Biztech€dltor Stephanie Hess Copy Life Editor David Wylle Stephanie Hess Online Editors Melanie Irvine Health Editor Special Section Editor Saadia Hussain Advertising Manager Marg Middleton^'^ose Dan Pamela f J Cameron French yveivs Editors Carlo Corbo Editor Birch ' M' * "'^ On-Campus Editor # Jennifer Zaiitack - Goldfricht etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... confidence. million Comedy is a major export for Canada and a point of pride for the country. We accept that the fame and bright lights Hollywood and New York continue to steal many of will of our brightest minds. But introduced it's nice to know they remember where they came from. Nancy a publication of the Humber College School 205 Humber College Blvd., Etoblcoke.ON, M9W 5L9, Ptione (416) 675-6622 ext.4514, Fax (416) 675-9730. Brian Pascual " Is of Media Studies. Office 231, Creative Advisor Please ' direct all advertising inquiries to: (416) 675-4390. ext. 231 Burt Sales Nikki Koeiler Jeff Russell etc... etc... it The Humber Et Cetera Chris Vernon John Edwards eic... and unbreakable selfTo have the multidollar mouths of Myers lessness, Humber Et Cetera Is produced In partnership with the Toronto Division of the Metroland Newspaper Chain Photography Editor Jenn Cochrane more than a the program two years ago. a pile of garbage? Editorial/Opinion Editor 8^ piece of advice school is Comedy is seen as a positive sign. sight in a profession Who to a a living from the craft. welcome tion wants to go usually faces a and Mochrie singing the praises of the Humber program has to be Editor-in-Chief Managing Editors $3,450 for the undergrad- where a common contaminates any comedy graduate long road before actually making a business built on tenacity, fear- Maybe it would be cheaper and more effective to invest in all-purpose Rubbermaid garbage bins. where the scholar- neighbour Engin- that the traditional programs, the scholarships are a material to be recycled. really in uate and $6,700 for post-grad people in turn, $30,000 For comedy students saddled garbage into the recycling slots which Humber Comedy, you with higher-than-average tuition student's recy- the garbage overflow, you're the if ships. to is goes without saying that alphabetical get about of these bins It comedy is not like traditional programs like English, or even its Theatre? Well, could ever manage. budding comedians and improv king Colin College School of the offered recy- mob Mochrie into the Winter Garden the eye- onto the sidewalk? What about with Waste Control blocked, the garbage sidewalk are emptied by city workers. falling cling facilities. If not often enough. money worth increase If con- saving people in charge of emptying these the Co-ordinator of Contracted own Is is Hall, week. a sore of rotting garbage literally discovered that there are several made a deal with OMG Media. Humber gets free garbage bins and OMG gets to advertise on them, all has their Obviously this twice cling services included in the bins? some bins. Humber emptied are sidewalks in front of metal garbage bins because they over the college. Toronto claims these garbage bins not yet filed the college. condi- ones outside. Humber and plaint about the garbage heaps well. Humber to these poses a question It of the college, these bins are also found inside the college as emptying of mak- who reside therein their own city for the duration of the conference, and you have more state-sponsored Austin Powers, the Kids in the of of course prisoners in so the city all stars support City Summit out of the protesters inconvenienced, ed to military maneuvers. The complex system down, buses rerouted, motorists in of garbage. piles a was a What do you get when you toss money worth and has for the of fences that promises to keep it could put on what really amount- saving a prison that in been specially emptied it were Streets the gathering of 700 or so like nothing. at may not have featured dampened mayhem happened. someone please empty the garbage will make many had been Will which officers, decide to just skip the upcoming front-page stoiy before garbage again over sweaty- City, the 5,000 police might they it, the tear-gas I'm stuck in a pile of Quebec In been have successful. already okayed a deployment of counters Carl. endeavors immensely humour about Paul Martin's meeting of the coin- College. Bring the big shovel this time." to Quebec cops had a sense of truncheons While the protest Tuesday it's is faced municipal politicos have really, their Humber the purpose of protest with rubbing of at Day parade. grab the public's attention, then citizens salivating at the prospect "Hey Ed? Yeah, could have it St. Patrick's Editorial , send your , letters . and comments 7 to the „ Et newsroom in L231 or email us at etc@adTnin.humberc.on.ca. All submissions must include name and phone number for verification. Cetera etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. 2001 April 5, "Here I am, talking to some neanderthal hired by the U.S. government, trying to find out how I can legitimately enter the country, and she's giving me pointers on how to sneak in." -Dave Ward a student visa Getting like to speak, taking great pleasure bowling alley employee with a some with her deep manly voice, telling mullet. is trying to play baseball; mound throws you jackass on a curve balls until you're so beat, it brings tears to your eyes. I'm planning to go to Chicago summer internship do an unpaid to at TV a station: I me, "Sir, you'll be treated like United Stytes of Amorica, access to the States. sir". Next, call a co-op counsellor at He need a J-i student visa two dollars a minute to speak we ton and off The guy and that try as push the but- me I don't need a can enter the coun- I though up a visitor for six to months. you're only going for if " the summer, "You he said. might want to check with immigration first. Here's the number." The immigration officer begins tells me unpaid internship. I get the application? get a bit little chapped. Next, Dave Ward A lady answers, tell her my sit- call I student visa application. She me I can't even apply the U.S. embassy, for the second have time. My blood begins to boil. "For further consultation you will be charged two dollars per minute," a machine politely says. Starting to move from chapped agitated, can I feel needles forming in to the pins and my feet. can get a if I don't a specific paid job lined up. someone the 24 or not American airmen have been released is by China by the time published, one thing tain: this for cer- is George W. Bush and his made Republicans have definitely a change in foreign policy. Where Clinton referred to Bill the Chinese as "strategic partners". Bush now refers to "strategic adversaries" he probably skeptical as (although pronounced Where "stragetic") seemed them it Clinton about the National Missile Defense plan, Bush sees it as the greatest thing since sliced bread (which ral since natu- is he worships Ronald "Lord Vader" Reagan.) Also, a few weeks ago, the U.S. me else at this office told sir," she says, how to sneak I me in. begin to pace back and forth - my blood boiling, face as red as a Then she well-slapped ass. me pointers on the best thing to do sure I the make to male immigration talk to a men is tells Apparently, are more lenient than the women. I I throw the phone position and begin to weep. suppose, while because had. I why realize woman this is nan- realized that had been balls, change ups, and then finished me off with a spirit killer - the knuckle- ball. I I was tired and I felt used. just couldn't believe that I wasted nearly S25 to have some government-hired feed me telemarketer useless information. Eventually tion out. I sorted the situa- I ended up paying a pile of I money to stu- SWAP a get the visa. won't celebrate now, I'm sure nering on about nothing - I'm they've got a few smoked, paying two dollars a minute and play on me. W. I They threw me curve voice of an over-tanned, overbeer-t-shirt-wearing on lay there I was so distraught I dent organization called Before self-combusting in rage, the v»ith I ernment, trying to find out how something completely different." "Well At this point against the wall, curl up into the the floor, I commis- sion. fetal some talking to officer at the border. "About an hour ago I tell her, Diplomacy, another of George Whether tells she's probably getting a neanderthal hired by the U.S. gov- I uation and ask where replies. am and she's giving even a I easy grants can legitimately enter the country', I At this stage I'm beginning to "Oh yeah, you should have no problem it's "Where can 'The U.S. Embassy," he go. tells visa I Here rhymes off a bunch of statistics. machine came on and told me to a representative. I and hang up while she said thanks to tell about some out-of-the-way border town that a local university. it me eny She then proceeds other person tryn to enner the phoned the U.S. embassy and a costs et costs a lot to intern south of the border It this Opinion cetera more tricks to Bush's weaknesses bombing (which only Canada and suddenly tossed 50 Russian spies foreign off American soil, the Qichen, came to severe disagreements when they clashed about Kuwait voiced support of) human rights, and Taiwan. So much for the new gov- with Bush haven't been rosy so far cant move of its kind most signifi- since Reagan threw out 55 during the Cold War- Qian minister, policy missile defence, The U.S. also led the way in making sure that Cuba was the era. ernment being Bush isolationist. only country not included in the is proposed free trade agreement which covers all of North and South America. not only China, Russia, and Cuba, Regarding the spy plane dent, China as sor, was reports indicate but Japan as well - a celebration Hans Niedermair inci- likely the aggres- that further souring relations with dent by having confiscated the men air- and the spy plane which is is Of course, Canada's relations either. Canadians, being the sensible lot that we are, should definitely stand up to our increasingly repug- nant neighbours to the south. We scheduled by the Americans to should commemorate Harbour and World War II. defence system, keep selling our very well with the Americans, and stand firm while Pearl their involvement in This doesn't sit who say lumber no to the missile dirt-cheap the to Chinese warplanes have lately apparently bustling with military Japanese made technology and top secret infor- fishermen in a collision with a tapping our natural gas reserves. mation (which the Chinese would showboating American submarine. And, oh yes. Bush's adminis- While we're up some of daddy's loose ends by teaming up Then again, we don't want to get Bush too angry. He might "demo- with England to give Iraq a good liate" us. a habit of 'TDuzzing" foreign aircraft that fly within or around their airspace. be stupid not to However, the Chinese have found the perfect situation in which to test the new U.S. presi- had already been getting worse at a recent White House meeting where Bush and a Chinese fully inspect.) Relations tration also recently lost nine tied Word On tllC IStrCCt We asked students who their favourite Canadian singers are . Bush continues at to harass us it, about the Jays could win the World Series again, too. Here are their words.. 1^ Teresa Bonnici Business Andrew Koss Trish Fenech and Chef Training Management first-year Antonella Vecchio Law Clerk first-year "Nelly Furtado, I like her "Celine Dion, she has a very and they've been nice voice, her lyrics are great and rap a unique sound." around etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... artists, for a while." Anna-Maria White General Arts and first-year Science first-year first-year "The Rascalz, they have the best hip hop sound of all Canadian music, Hike her style and she has Marcus Myerscough Chef Training she's a down to earth person.' etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. Opinion "Neil Young, he's pioneersof rock 'n roll knows how to rock etc. etc. etc. one of the and he still in his old age." etc. etc... "Deborah Cox, she's taken Canadian RStB music to the high- est level." etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... 2 10 April 5, 2001 & Life et cetera Health "We just don't want to use the treadmills anymore." -Paul Sevcik Eco tourism gives teens dream jobs by Katy de Vries If "We just you want to add some excitement not explore the great outdoors? to your summer, why Back-countPi' hiking, don't want to use the treadmills any- more. Outdoor adventure offers a unique regime mention the excite- for physical fitness, not to kayaking and hang ghding, can change your regular daily- ment, fim and personal fulfillment that comes routine into an enjoyable, exhilarating adventure that could from participating lead to a possible career. said. Canada brought industiy, bounds It's from the tourism grow to in leaps and Ashwin Nivsarkar of the Tourism Training Vancouver. Adventure tourism is currently the growing sector within the industry, he said. "You bet serious billion last year said, Institute in fastest $28 in and that number continues there's opportunity in this industry money to be made not just a job anymore, ... there is adventure travel and tourism. in it's a career," Nivsarkar said. Connelly said today's generation of adventure seekers consists of young professionals who are making more money and willing to spend They are looking to KATTDEVRIES |y„„^ „„; Canada's growing Eco Tourism industry has created a to their lives, and the industry is catering to these ^^^,^f^ ofjobs for people looking for extreme careers. individuals by providing diversity in outdoor programs they don't necessarily have the expertise activity. "We There are ample personal benefits to doing outdoor You learn are blessed with nature here in Canada. This country offers sports, Connelly said. know that you can achieve door market." mind to depend on and For entrepreneurs searching for their calling or those aiming for a challenging livelihood, Connelly suggested acquiring to yourself, mountain and these goals may put you out of your comfort offer zone, but is seasonal in Canada. becomes an and not as many people are as willing to issue take on outdoor sports, either as participants or as busi- that goal it bonus when and transferable benefits where you can see positive tion, "The trend is heading more towards participating I in out- think that the jobs start is Paul Sevcik, director of Equinox Adventures in Toronto, graphics show doors as part of a healthy lifestyle in your health and attitude towards a natural environment. It's relatively & ity. procedure, data verification and all after care personally performed by Dr. Arnold Kravetz I. Kravetz f'ti>^uiiin ti Sutgeon ^^» Vreatment customized to meet your personal lifestyle objectives <S* Same location for 20 years -Conveniently located in the Medical Office Building adjacent to the Etobicoke General Hospital technology examination to avoid night vision problems -3B» State-of-the-art -39^ Free initial Consultation Experience • Affordability 416-749-4 89 Humber College 111 Blvd. Suite Ml newsroom with news 4513 or 4514. all Martin, These etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... to stay within contacts, artists are adventure travel or exciting outdoor cycle, paddle or climb through the great out- way and It makes can be heard. Tropical music styles like it is run Merengue and Cumbia all run their own schools and borders. Years before salsa places like the "I Much like any new experi- ence, going to a Latin club, Congo and Japan. used to sit beside the bands regardless of the "classes that a that played salsa and listen to the richness of Latin American them music-not the one fouiid in record stores, but the one that is learned at weddings and par- in dubs," said former Canadian Professional Venecia Champion Service, Agent, "I ties, dancing, Latin I really remember learned to dance to music," said from El Life & Health in they played rience. "When Bassam Janafi,' Latin American who now ' go to clubs," said Chilean Cabin meet a lot of who International School of Dance. dance. The first couple of times the music, ifs very hot" cially, ,< I Oritz, a people runs Salsa dancing are learning how to they're not too great, but a cou- Schools of Latin and, espe- Rugaraas, a 21-year-old stu- onginaU)r when may have taken, can be a scary expe- the "It's Ana night amount of beginner introducing North America to all sell videos and go to conferences." bands played long into the night in is bongo drums the beats of the by former students of mirife that when I first saw them could barely move," he said. "Now they alive, North America, of an extremely rich can't on a looking for fun, friends and fitness this sum- if you're the current Latin Invasion swept musical tradition, but perhaps "I easy to stay "There are schools that are cross only the their biggest contribution is it a and move a part of Salsa, Enrique Salvador. "I learped todance at etc... etc. , and Jennifer Lopez. Iglesias exotic love the liveliness of it the rage, many dubs setting up Latin Ricky made the parties, weddings, wherever. I floors to the beat of performers like tend yx)ur hips the Latin my culture." with it this will may seem like right foot," Connelly said. "It doors. Latin dances are dent, etc... So, mer; hike, you feel when tips at ext. eco and adventure and beating drums. slurface & detailed Quality * Safety • Whether There are some businesses out there that are offering Dr. A. you on the Become a camp counsellor in a spe- at an outdoor recreation center, personal level and as a lucrative business opportunity. by Juan Pablo de Dovitiis Swaying hips, exotic lyrics E>^ -Initial consultation, laser in work sports interest you, this industry has lots to offer both in Sevcik said. Shake refractive surgery 0» Premium personalized attention simple to get started in school. involved," she said. tourism but Sevick said to research the outfitter for credibil- KRAVETZ LASER CENTRE for laser vision correction life," still about, so once you've "Adventure sport can become addictive, especially when demo- that people are turning to exercise in the out- Call the Sevcik said, as well you begin to achieve your goals and see improvements not just for the thrill seekers. According to welcomed hiring in this field. large industry but those in as personal satisfaction and increased self-esteem. area go hand in hand with the rising participation trend," Connelly said. The outdoors skills, comes to cialized area or long term effects as well," Connelly said. ship qualities and communication it "Students interested in this field need to get some experience while participa- Adventure industry participants and staff develop leader- door recreation and adventure sports so elc... are important. -First aid accreditations are also a So living. from outdoor sport Whether canoeing, white water rafting, or rock climbing, certifications allows you to translate accomplishment into your everyday there are immediate benefits nesses. in this when you reach that sense of Because Canadian winters are so harsh, she said, safety the areas that most interest you. certifications in win an adventure race or hike a set a goal to in said. your goals when you put your co-ordinator at ture tourism operation methodology or resource base to back up, he it. "You may Eco and Adventure Tourism program Humber College, agreed that a lot of outlets summer employment for students because the adven- it. add some adventure and fun everything needed to sustain a dynamic and prosperous out- Christine Connelly, outdoor sports," he in these ple are becoming more and mor^ P?^' moQ. as llavi& the cfimV where of weeks after they start going to clubs, they are just .as good ^.m^st people. Tile thing [ is to jusir <im tctstiatt* ' ^ , etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... April 5, 2001 11 Rid yourself of yellow teeth by Linda Kang older people Morning coffee is not the only thing that people should avoid if coffee ing soda or a bleaching agent has appeared and other caffeinated bev- erages, along with the nicotine from ing, are the blamed Hammer has ing soda claiming that blueberries, Mcintosh, Craig dentist, recently, Arm and new gum with bakwill it whiten your Media first-year Copywriting student at Humber, has used According to David Kim, a Toronto fam- and cosmetic released a teeth and give you fresh breath. other foods can be blamed as well. ily More retail outlets. in smok- most common substances for staining teeth, has been a growing concern In the past decade, toothpaste with bak- they're con- cerned about staining their teeth. Though it younger generations. for "Foods such as Arm the tomato sauces and drinks, such and Hammer toothpaste for just over a year. said he "never really worried about his teeth ening of the teeth." yellowing," the baking soda toothpaste good to whitening not use [a toothpaste] that may do something, rather than the regular brand I ommends is use, just in case. "Why with every day use. Predominantly noted in Everyday food products like spaghetti sauce and red wine contiibute to teeth staining. Though he as red wine can also contribute to the dark- Discoloration of the teeth takes place FAMEU GOLDFRICHT brand baking soda gum doubt the toothpaste or [with this Kim store brands "Are not as effective as profes- dental offices. "The gums teeth, but the gums from are fragile, and he as well," ly Cosmetic dentists use a solution that that it makes the colour of teeth She Hwan Ahn, whitened lasts the longest," cosmetic procedure, and when may talked felt I I his teeth home kit. conscious of [my teeth] wanted to get them capped my dentist me out of it saying that would screw I Ahn not be suit- teeth," Ahn said. explained that his two front teeth are hyper-calcified, agent] 200 digs which means that they were Following the of the tooth might lie "My He added, ineffective to because 20s in their late teeth were whiter than white. But pleased now," whiten them," Kim said. women Ahn treatment, down since then, the colour has toned deeper than the 200 would be initial describes his teeth as "gleaming white." Medications can also contribute to the dis- finds that years ago using the smiled. I up healthy coloration of the tooth, however, the yellow it University of whiter than his other teeth, and stood out. [whitening microbes, and a with veneer or porcelain, but (also microbes into the surface of the tooth. Kim five "To me, and acid washers 25, Toronto Pharmacy student, had said. "The is bamide peroxide. The tooth whitening procedure includes a custom-made tray that ensures the solution will come into contact with the teeth and stay off gums. The most common treatment Kim rec- whiter. it to every trend. able for everyone. said. 10 to 24 per cent hydrogen peroxide or car- toothpaste claims However, there are exceptions bleaching treatment because age group to request the procedure. known as super whitening) which range from $400 to $1,000. The teeth whitening treatment is a pure- they were just the toothpastes would not only whiten the Over-the-counter kit] laser whitening as effective as treatments available LINDA KANG home common and older are the most Other whitening treatments include is different." if home care the two weeks for one hour a day, and can be re-used later on for touch ups. "You will get the most for your money said the over-the-counter or drug- He would be concerned is which ranges from $300 lasts are very sional treatments because the solution kit to$6oo. The ... harmful," Mcintosh said. Kim for his' patients I Ahn ... I'm said. "I'm careful about what know that they won't I eat stay brilliant white forever." Don't get burned; use your sun sense by Jody Johnson According to Marg Anne people with darker complexions think that they are safer Jones, sun tanning is both ugly than those with lighter complexions. and dangerous. "I Jones, a health counsellor at Humber "People have to realize that a tan it is College said that, not beautiful." Humber At a Sun Sense seminar at Jones made am not at risk for it [skin cancer]," said post-graduate clinam dark skinned. I lived Southeast Asia and am therefore used to the hot sun." ical in College on Tuesday, quite clear that the sun can have serious long- research student Asmaa Yassin. "I Ann Foster, also a health counsellor at said, "All skin cancer. dents with information on sun protection. Students were protected exposure to sunlight." encouraged to ask questions, read pamphlets on sun sense and received a bottle of Lubriderm sunscreen. is number one cause of premature "Sun damage is accumulative." are also the said. Contrary to popular damaging belief, UVB rays aging," Jones itself is tanning, as well as burning, is an immunity to the sun by becoming hyper pigmented." Tanning salons are just as big a the skin as tanning risk to salons," ultra violet Jones said. is safe, especially tanning "Tanning salons have the same amount of damaging ultra violet rays as the sun." Another common etc... etc... etc... will etc. etc. etc... is that -'! recommended if have to be cautious of reflected rays which occur Even if it is when you cloudy out, you are still JODV JOHNSON exposed to reflected rays which can burn the skin." "I had something removed from considered it Students participate in Sun Sense Day activities. my hand," she said. 'They driving. be too careful these days." The first thing they to be a pre-cancerous growth. You are even at risk for burning For many, the information provided booth was both shocking and when you are driving because your hands and face are exposed One is the depletion of the ozone layer. ting a greater etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. amount of those damaging Life & Health "I scaping RN in student at Humber. the summertime. I rays. "We are get- We just can't realize that used to work in land- harm I now "I coming from the Philippines. sun protection is very important and that no type of tanning etc... etc... etc... Sun Sense never thought about the that the sun can do, said. at the beneficial. used to take no precautions whatsoever," said Paul Perlas, a of the causes for such an increase in skin cancer 'The ozone layer has thinned," Foster misconception about tanning ' allow you 150 minutes of to reflective rays, even through the windshield." radiation 3K.,. that people cover up as much you are only outside for a few minutes. "People should always wear hats and cover their arms and legs when exposed to the sun," Foster said. "People also Foster also warned me about was under natural sunlight. your roTccT ?.... i' 3 College, Reflected rays have seriously burned Foster herself. skin damage," Jones said. "Tanning forces the skin to repair itself by building "No of at least 15 are in or near the water. to the skin. 'Tanning An SPF as possible - even not only the number one cause of skin cancer, but from a beauty perspective, the sun's Humber Apr./ Tu«da;< can burn and a severe burn can result in skin term effects on a person's skin. The seminar provided stu- "Sun damage *Thm SiMse is safe." etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. M/' , .'llf^^sw* Support! np -^^^^ ;?rl For grant information, call p-mnnq 1-800-398-1141 AS SEEN BY du Maurier A RTS -f April 5, 2001 "But in the live Arts cetera show, it's there. It's a homo-erotic Disneyland." -Darrin s 13 Hagen et , Wrestling comes out of the closet by April Labine man. Skin tion, their tight-fitting April Banigan, Joe Bird and Hagen and Borg glistening with perspira- said that the audiences in Toronto are very dif- span- Page have Jeff dex clings to every bulge and ferent curve, drav\dng attention to their said they aren't afraid to partici- first pate. with Hagen. They parade around crotches. heavy boots, arms raised in umph. Welcome in Hagen tri- is the brainchild of Edmonton's Darrin Hagen of the comedy troupe Guys in Disguise, and Wes Borg of the troupe Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie. "We did some mushrooms and went to a cabin out at the lake and hammered off draft one in 72 formance we Wednesday. last ran out of junk food, then is they have enjoyed the process of monogamous Hagen plays Randy Rage, the rising star determined to make it big and the only heterosexual man on the tour. April Banigan plays Angle Rage, his supportive and any fuckin* sense!'" enthusiastic wife. Everyone is wrestler, fresh lege joins content until a from wrestling col- them, determined to be at the top. Rock The Cock Hard, played by Joe Bird, his new punk rock named is for "It's very and the in much the fall of Randy rise of The Cock." sonality, composer, actor, play- and drag artiste. His performing career started at the Toronto single review from said, 'This is the worst thing they've ever put on TV.'" Hagen and Borg aren't "Hell no!" wrestling! now-defunct Flashback, a where he performed as a drag He has published a book called The Edmonton Queen: Not club we were all really about the idea of this, sort man excited of, gay in a hyper-masculine world homo shit on stage. I couldn't believe how much they used it." this have much homoerotic behaviour the in WWF show. "Not to our "Not one so faces," was opening telling night went, 'This man! This whole year later. first thing we did, in the Toronto Sucks," Borg etc... etc... said. etc... etc... etc... say, 'It doesn't make really ride the narrow edge on that one." was much Hagen and Borg get their mes- sage across and they are definitely different. on the edge with their no-holds- said. us about nists. said. "They're all misogy- And then make the woman a total bitch. Well, don't ever do word to the wise, that." They "It's said. will be delighting audi- 15. After that, a two-city tour," "We're calling it Hagen the world premiere/final tour." queen He did- it until a I'd get Don't get a pissed ual Rule off. man, PileDriver! big girl. called wrestling on TV as homoerotic. "Well, episode, was sing a song and in He knew uppity. all play. us about erotic Disneyland." "The said. fucking sick' wrestling boots. first Hagen fucking sick is is maybe they don't televise it," Hagen said, "but in the live show, it's there. It's a homo- it life," Edmonton, where some in 1992. Afterwards, don't see "Lying to yourself is what ruins your is one of the first male roles he nasty article about men who watch is guy sat behind him and Hagen wrote a it and he was accused of straight bashing. Most site Hagen Brad [Moss], our far. and songs on his Web MP3.e0m. He is a musician, songvmter, performer and playwright. The Dead Trolls had a TV show that aired across the country his sketches of being straight that he actually gay. they head back to Edmonton. very convincing heterosex- at Flashback. if the Theatre until April play get as racy as they did up Hagen they hadn't seen so let their a Riverboat Story about his years Borg designs software and puts "I "In the first version of the play number one." Though Hagen plays a Borg said that they wouldn't queen. brings realizes after a ing the fags and the drag queens," n't tell WWF, I saw all man who hostility against PileDriver! for the to life a serious mesIt ences at Buddies in Bad Times about being as macho as And then going is sage to the story. are complete misogynists, includ- you can, as red-neck as you can. that's all Though PileDriver! promises Hagen and Borg said that they haven't seen any homophobic director, Hagen said. "I hate It was amazing •fucking freaked," said Borg. barred performance. Despite the premise of their play, because Hagen and Borg are celebrities Edmonton. Hagen is a TV per- wright "And every to the sex scenes. we thought, okay let's make a play where you've got four men who displaying the newest thing to hit the mats ofpro wrestling. wrestling fans. rooster hairdo Borg simplifies the plot with, said. Originally, the play COURTESY PHOTO comes change that message. You have to writer with their bad selves it be careful because one word can Page. down and dirty when are too afraid to face the Harvey Jones, played by Jeff wrestlers get pletely differently anything else," "I can't tolerate Homo-evotic of course gay audiences react com- can't stand actors now. it is Wes who manager tour enter- But, "Not coming out, not being gay. And you know, you've got to where relationship with wrestling the most and there He is in a committed and vrestler. it is everyone. issue of a was a lot of collaboration. The actors helped get the script to Borg plays for group of actors. roles were, for the didn't write They hope that taining laughter, there part, written for the actors Karl the Killer Kraut, a veteran Hagen and Borg making the play. They are thankful for having such a creative The a story about gay explains. "The straight audience gets Hagen and Borg agree that wrestlers travelling through the bible belt in the 1970s. ence. off stage thinking, biggest losers on the planet!" left." PileDriver! gized. Hagen said. "Second night comes along and then it's like, we suck! We're the we "Cause I'm a queen," Hagen the play for a specifically gay audi- we're the kings," "'Till time they have ever worked from second-night syndrome. Opening night leaves everyone feeling happy and ener"You walk Hagen said after their per- hours," was the projects in the past. This explains that they are suffering to PileDriver!, a play about gay wrestlers. PileDriver! than those out West. Borg worked on all Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie has played. that it is all in He explains the power of and that he is really more comfortable in a acting dress than he "It's "It's fake," is in his Hagen said. so fake. I'm really a etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. ..etc... I'm a big Arts girlie etc. ..etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... 1 April 14 5, 200 %.< Awards Indie a celebration of sound The first annual Canadian Independent Music Awards hounoured the best of the best in the by Caroline Grech Scratching Post and Serial Joe were among the winners Sunday night as the Canadian music industry honoured its Canadian music industry on Saturday Electronica to Blues. Fans were able to down appreciate music on the cutting edge with voted for their favourite performances from one nominee band in each to five. Fans also Canadian Music Week Street, the Not even the obvious lack of enthusiasm ance of the night by awards marked a new beginning for inde- shown by host Humble Howard could dampen the spirits of each artist upon win- Scratching Post electri- ning their prizes. fuschia-haired future stars at the first annual Canadian Independent Music Awards. Set in a church on Queen pendent music in Canada. Honouring musicians in 12 different awards covered a broad spectrum of musical talents ranging from categories, the It was not the performances that reminded the crowd these were artists on the cusp of success but rather their graciousness in accepting their awards, often forgetting to face photographers fied perform- final the crowd, with lead singer Nicole Hughes banging out chords on her guitar. The show drew four close to a of days Canadian concerts, movies and seminars all Canadian band relating to the Canadian award for Best Metal. music industry. Over the weekend bands played in over 25 venues cross-section Denise Donlon, Jann Arden, Rubin "The of music experts from across Canada, first entertained the audience with a live per- The Canadian industry The Immigrants \, Web site. were chosen by a roughly 60 formance and won best pop band at the Indie Awards. '^ show off their new prizes. The nominees to CAROLINE GRECH ^,, or singer via the To qualify for the Indie awards, nominees must sell under 10,000 units and must be without any multi-national label. categor>'. night. submitting 10 all over the city celebrating music. Guest speakers like Hurricane" Carter and Lionel Richie covered all areas of the industry by speaking about their experiences Rock 'n' roll bad boy in the industry. Tommy Lee was also entries for each cat- scheduled to speak but could not get across egory and eventual- the border because of his criminal record. ly narrowing them Awards were also given out for best Scratching Post picked up the 1 April 200 5, 15 Humber wins Campus Music Search Bands as a "Duo" the Laundry Room Quartet brought home first place for Humber. After winning the Battle of the by Tara Smith H Laundry Room Quartet (LRQ) were victorious last Thursday night after winning the Campus Music Search in London. "We brought it home for umber's Humber , drummer College," said you go to a battle of and the 10 bands are same. [Here] they were Ryan First-year jazz students Rob the differ- all ent." The music ranged from punk to coffee house Rob Kent said, was the most variation I've rockabilly, to acoustic. Bassist "It my entire bands were ever seen in Matt Ross. the bands, like all "The life." very all Ian good," Ross said. "The competi- Parliament and Ross are now was relatively stiff." Each band gave their most energetic performance in an effort to attract attention from the audience and the judges. "Every band was doing their best stuff on stage, jumping around and stuff," Parliament Casselman, Kent, champions after their award winning performance at provincial The Wave, one of two pubs at the University of Western Ontario. "It was like being at the Grammy's," Ross said. "The tension was so immense as they were saying third [place] and And then first place, 'from Humber College, the Laundry Room Quartet!'" second. LRQ travelled to London to participate in the competition winning the battle of the after bands at Humber on March 23. tion said. There was no indication as to well the LRQ was fairing how against their competitors, as the judges wore their best poker faces the entire night. "These guys were blank," said Kent. "You couldn't tell what They were up against bands from Fanshawe, Sheridan, Niagara, and Georgian colleges as well as Western, McMaster, and they liked or didn't Carelton universities. Some of the things judges were looking for included stage presence, song writing ability performance and any vocals," MacLellan The LRQ won a $250 cash prize, a membership to the Canadian Organization of Campus Activities (COCA) and a half page mention in the COCA was a lot of really We tition. There healthy compelike. had no certainty of PHOTO COURTESY OF MARK \UCLELLW winning." overall impression. Mark MacLellan, ment manager at entertain- Western, host- Ryan Casselman, Rob Kent, Ian Parliament and Matt Ross put on a prize winning mented. in London "I really last Thursday night at the Campus Music Search. com- appreciated the attribute to the Stephen Anastasi, Humber Students' Federation (HSF) vice- here." ed the event and was impressed have the opportunity to play formerSi president of "The quality of the bands, overall, was very, very good," MacLellan said. "Four bands were so close. It was a really judge at number's battle of the bands was thrilled by the news of number's win and the opportu- any COCA member at college or university across Canada. The guys had a great time par- ticipating in the event all and said by the talent displayed by all per- the bands were amazing. tough decision to make." "You could As for MacLellan's thoughts on number's LRQ? "I liked that they didn't have tell they were into their craft," said Ian guitarist Parliament, "'cause a lot of times worth the expense. Though most CDs David Gray's White Ladder etc... etc... etc... is etc... etc... Janssen like We're Not Love and Say Wave Goodbye his give evi- obvious inspiration His music is White also perfect for a dinner or just to calm a stressful heavy is laid in acoustic on top of syn- Babylon His laid back, slow late Sunday afternoon voice is trast to his lively fits in per- with the positive rock music such as Vertical Horizon's Best I've Ever Had and Coldplay's Yellow. CD the perfect con- back beats. etc... etc... etc... etc. come last in four or "We feel very proud of them and very happy for them, and we hope that they'll go on to bigger and better things," Janssen said. LRQ will take the stage again April 17 to participate in the final round of JJQ's battle of the bands. The guys have a chance at winning a cash prize as well as some be studio time. heaven with this CD, so in obviously it's not for everyone. In some may slow, find his but you sound can't please everyone. If I from had to predict another hit album I would definite- this ly bet on the album's opener. Please Forgive ESL Me. Though a sounds similar to Babylon summery the punch to hit the charts. also carries with certain timeliness in the sound he has in his lyrics; it you can almost see the barbeque smoke billowing toward the sky and the blazing sunset casting soul. etc... etc... and The song The always five years. Teacher Trailing Courses it Inteii-sive album. David Gray makes is in first place," "Humber has the top three for the the perfect cruising music is hits to come said. fectly date, who Humber] ballads. Ladder for a single hit, time a Humber band has been sent and won." first gize you. for this Babylon and for those of you hate buying so the is programs co-ordinator, said she was overjoyed by number's win. "We all feel very proud that they are the first [band from tediously for perfect cruising music. hit it's "It's HSF the thesized beats that relax and ener- dence of heard of his new think amazing," Anastasi said. also who leadership and social fact, Hello all I band. music program organizer Lise Janssen, guitar riffs Right, This Year's You've will create for the and Van Morisson and Taylor, James this album is truly made for someone with a love for Song names by Melanie Irvine it life an "It's number's Battle of the Bands of his songs have the same synthesis of David Gray White Ladder nity campus "I'm ecstatic! David Gray's album continued. saxophone." summer 2001. As a COCA member, the LRQ will now brochure for "I'm really proud of them," Anastasi shadows on the landscape. Mix 99.9 Arts CHUM my personal preference because it my favorite Van Morrison quotes listener would Overall, David Gray makes for a laid back listening experience. .etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. 50-hour TESL courses Classroom inanagciiicnt (cchniques Detailed lesson planning An honourable mention must go to Say Hello Wave Goodbye, song. Overall, the average 104.5 or has it etc. Skills development: grammar, pronun- and writing Comprehensive teaching materials Teaching practicuni included Listings of schools, agencies, and recruiters from around (he world For Mora Info Contact Oxford Samiiura: ciation, speaking, reading 416-924-3240/ 1-800-269-6719 www.oxfordseininars.coni etc. etc. etc... etc... etc... April 16 5, 2001 Laurier students caged up Survivor style by Darren Stevenson may It payoff the or heat Outback Australian of the but i6 of this because how form much Challenge". Committee and based on the who would be out to see cameras had all and it CTV and CKCO have all been here the last guess I've been on the news. biggest challenge been a really good time and Minor The format of the event, similar to the show, saw two teams named Maku'e and Kula compete in immunity challenges and head STEVENSON DARREN STEVENSO! of the best parts Laurier students smile for the camera during contestants one and competed immunity 53 winner The the of about winning immunity but as things as a spaghetti dinner with became more about strategy and alliances," said Maja Yuricek, activities co- garlic bread ordinator for the event. time progressed in indi- challenges. it "This One dubbed challenge was petition, raises school spirit the the meet new people. We've put them est with they didn't mystery meat, hot chicken wing through a lot of tests so the win- knocked out sauce, dried fish, live crickets and ner Maku'e one by one." Aside from immunity challenges, participants also had the opportunity to win rewards mealworms. Yuricek said. through purchase "The worst thing I had to do was eat a mealworm because it didn't taste good at all." various make cage event to competitions living a es "In the beginning was it music by Ryan McLaren Now label that Eric's Trip is music memory, Rick White's side Elevator ect finally is a quasi-incarnation of the former band. and dnmimer Mark Gaudet to Hell, a side-project At a recent gig at the with White's vAfe Tara. After two albums they changed their to Elevator name they changed their name to simply Elevator for the release of their fifth album, EI A Perspective, released in live show, the back of the stage with coloured gaining lights high- set, Tara apol- don't need to practice," White said. about making. You only need to practice Spiritual ^ffr n rsiinfo^ Medium Speclairst in old traditional African occult activities. Inherited from generation to generation. Exp. 21 years. does not matter the nature of probiemi He can help in: • Recovering of love happiness It wlien a relationship has been broken down of loneliness and finding the best • Avoiding bankruptcy •Succeeding the radio, they do what Call etc. now: etc. (4 etc... 1 etc. They they want. This is if me they for some of the alliances that turned into a Simon Says," Worley said. is going to roll a 50-inch I how I'm TV home." how Elevator is art in even just it else It's all is full of now. tures, we You free. why shows in your spine. in music Even though we have whatever happens And lately," said struc- 2000 to just natu- music I've White. band played more hasn't the RYAN MCLAREN back up the newest CD? push a band, touring "I not in Elevator it's that's the kind of "I've never really believed ly that's spontaneous, which Elevator make mistakes now can't So it in have really loose structures now. really, 'cause and is guitar never fades into mean, maybe if just this art project you had to realW^ite said. Rick White looks like Bob Marley here. wise," you're just a bar that played rock songs but that no one if something we've as a genre in Toronto, interested planned. play evolves naturally," White said. "We never etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... I big game of when you're band more than a band anyway you encore and talked to fans that after the show. hung around "We always have just a kind of a cult following that understand it a bit," said any business 6)785-3499 etc. vote sparse but full-bodied The is solid. been listening to "It's in momentum "I'm Because they aren't on best described. • Total protection • Dissolving spells is radio." art. played It's Unlike drone-pop, which ral around with the music as partner music you're going to be on the • Reuniting loved ones • Breaking if It's obscurity; you can feel The since October. it. satisfying. Elevator "It's all bit disappointed that I to be hon- themselves because "The problem nowr we could rock a crowd. home at it Elevator's and "We and always done." scope images on a sheet strewn across the band hadn't played together or practiced September by Indie was a them that best doing our thing and we'd like, we're keep doing kaleido- ogized to the crowd for sounding rough. Taste of Complete more wanted to hear Mocambo, About halfway through the later, the is lighting the band. Through. Two albums bands, the band had three projectors casting started Elevator "I write songs just so many non-mainstream highly inspired by '70s psychedelia. Just before Eric's Trip split up. Rick White "It of the final 16. it emotional pulled the Richard better than the real thing is bread and butter of Elevator proj- emerging as more than do to mealworm because Teenage USA. Like a distant Indie had I final had. Bechthold applied for the event but was not selected as one "The worst thing eat a about Third-year Sociology student Leslie the Eating Wheel. was applications to enter the and after each application was graded, interviews took place before 16 were decided on. Cokes. and wasn't a big fan of finalists With only two bathroom passper 24 hours and one luxury Elevator's five his would be fooling themselves," Worley said. "I think I won because I set up secret alliances that no one knew about. Even Krista was surprised at the end when she found out deserving," contest Business student, was one of two little item, contestants could win such all 200 of Krista Schiestel, a second-year bit easier. Maku'e's four. mounds hay to find enough quarters to held throughout the three-day -Krista Schiestel dig through very Organizers received more than Another challenge had team members be will I told grounds, ing into the merger, and with their alliance they I game the Eating Wheel, which consisted of remaining members to six Hatch. former a took the "Krista approach but hot "The Kula team was up head- had plea to and Heading into the merger, Kula coffee five the seven-member jury. gives the survivors a chance to peppers, council, Survivor champion in school and provides healthy com- pub, Wilf s. the event? tribal Worley resembled event new and unique to our is final votes to two. a white water rafting trip for two. from the campus was the around here," Worley defeated Schiestel received a 50-inch television and were game said. After the the exposure is challenge a for this And the winner of that the school has received." members voted out, the two teams rherged vidual their hour survivor adventure. The winner walked away with a 50-inch TV. out of the cage. six was up "I event. vote off. because I was the secGeography voted contestant to be ond last interviews," said Worley. "Global, so second-year a student, day for was a crazy and wacky thing that I knew I had to be a part of. One into candy bars. in It's to tribal council to and feasted on Doritos and zine contest person standing after the 53-hour After To pass time, the contestants how at we were day reporters in our face stepped into a 20- square cage and battled foot we here hit first selected," played Twister, read Elle maga- finalist, Mark Minor, "On the men and Survivor, ii women five the get didn't I Bechthold said. received. Organized by WLU's Activities TV show that to see a second-year attention of the things they had to do, eating live crickets, I'm glad like it." was surprised said he "Survivor the could make I Business student also a of a steel cage in a cartipus con- dubbed watch the show I Simon Worley, students got their chance to experience "reality living" in the far some being a part and wanted the time all didn't get chosen, but after seeing at all," Schiestel said. "I really loved (WLU) Wilfrid Laurier University test good didn't taste not have a Si million tried to Arts don't really need to tour The band ended ..etc... the all the time." show with a double etc... etc... White. 'They know we're not just a rock band." etc... etc... etc.. etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... 1 April 200 5, 17 Special Section et cetera Music week showcased Canadian bands by Kristina Koaki and Jessica Markoff weekend, Canadian Music Week drew crowds to the 25 venues that Last (CMW) hosted about 150 this annual artists who performed at three-day music festival and Each club charged about $10 a head, but wristbands were available for $30, allowing lovers to see as wanted. - Next up was New York sensation, Lourds - a phenomenal vocalist, and rock-violinist. and spellbinding the mouths of the Playing a set of heart-felt rock songs, Lourds left packed club agape. Decked out conference. music Lourds io:oop.in. many bands as they Many venues packed their bills with four or five artists each night. DAY ONE 9:00p.m. - The Salads The Salads opened the show with groovebased, hip hop and funk-tinted alternative tunes. This Newmarket/Toronto based band offered a solid and entertaining their early time. The room was set, in a stunning costume, the flamboyant vocalist spilled powerful vocals while tactfully spinning her violin her bow to one side when the mood struck right. ii:oopin - Puddy Puddy played heavy alternative tunes. The Toronto-based band, originally hailing from Timmins, has been compared to Queens of the Stoneage and Motorhead. A fairly radio-friendly band, Puddy seemed to • be your run-of-the-mill rock band, but they KRISTINA KOSKI The Salads' Chuck Dailey (left) and Darren Dumas despite share a laugh during their performance. not quite full but they kept everyone's heads bouncing. From the tex-mex tune Mango Tango, to their metal influenced theme song, and ballad-like, hip still groove. hop favoured performance of set features All fantastic musicians, their awesome licks and riffs from ent. and smoke, often blinding the audience's eyes. the Intergalactic and the Intergalactic Rock Stars were definitely worth the Sio cover charge - visually though shouted they little blase often sounding similar to each one they played before. Robin Black speaking, but just don't expect anything musically revolutionary. "Robin Black says man Darren Dumas a.k.a. Mista D showed the crowed hjs range of tal- lit- pyrotechnics were a Even From sexy and melodic crooning to rapping and beat-boxing, front substance. Their set little exploded with i2:ooa.m. Robin Black and Rock Stars Dave Ziemba and bassist Chuck Dailey. Drum work by Grant Taylor wowed guitarist the small but captivated audience. presence with erally Although fantastic performers, their tunes Like a Souljah, the Salads offered something for everyone. packed their with tons of set KRISTINA KosKi , The guitar and b€lSS players far Puddy, a Toronto-based louder," this glam- band crotch-rock . ggemed to be all band, get into their music. i:ooa.ni. Zuul's Evil Disco - Zuul's Evil Disco crowd performed to a thinning the wee hours of Friday morning. in Wicked vocals spewed from a pimp-daddy disco king styling into a diido-fashioned microphone, and a dude in nothing but boxers and mud. The septet (two stage vocalists, was small for this a guitarist, bassist, drummer and two-person horn section) but they managed to slide around each other Their high-energy set was with ease. enjoyed by who were all alive still and kickin'. DAY TWO 9:20p.m. The Black Hales The Black Halos, a pop-punk band, took the stage. were full The half assed, glam-garbed guys of energy and pure excitement. The native Vancouver band visual display of raw far beyond the like human glammed-out stirred up a nature that glory of is bands Robin Black and the Intergalactic Rock Stars. But is it the vibrant sound that hits the music home. Charismatic front Billy Hopeless' strained vocals man pushed the hard-core lyrics across the barriers of every- day thought and emotion. Hopeless moved with ease, whether he was slithering across JESSICA Left-right: Lourd is Rock etc. the singer and electric violinist for the JESSICA MARKOFF MARKOFF band Lourds and Robin Black from Robin Black and the Intergalactic Story cont.'d on page 18 Rockin' and roUin' . . . Stars. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... Special Section etc... etc... etc. etc. etc... etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... 18 2001 April 5, and Rockin' with Canada's best musicians rollin' Continued from page 17 across the floor, or the hand of an audience member to put The edgy her hand on his member. guitar riffs and punchy drum and bass completed the bag of tricks up this band's lineup. Maybe beer? not, but musical With the trip. tive, this Memory Bank defi- audience on a psychedelic, nitely takes the taste of rock-alterna- band seemed like a warped version of the early Rheostatics, hinted with the ambient jazz flavour. They were a little odd too cautious when they took the stage and KRISTINA KOSKl unfortunately the music didn't reach the This bassist is from member the five audience band 3rd Degree. two or three songs until into the set. But, this band was about all Toronto based mood and 10:00p.m. 3rd Degree vated the crowd of listeners. This Toronto-based quintet took pimp to the point rock beyond the familiar sounds of Limp and Korn. Although frequently compared to these two bands, their music reeked of pounding, heavy grooves. Bizkit Fantastic lines oozed from the bassist. Elegance would be the only way his playing style. Still thrashing out, the most intricate licks fingertips with to describe an almost sickening ease. the band, vocalist Blaine Jeffery's presence was deeply the front row felt to the chick from the dude in passing out in the back. got Memory Bank, as a whole, was an intricate and solid group of talented musicians, the who bands strove at beyond many of CMW. 1:00a.m. - 3ooddo8 These guys should have kept practicing in their basement. 11:00p.m. Wisconsin The room was packed and the audience heads along to the catchy This young group of metal musicians from Burlington was unprepared for the stage. The band's aggressive instrumental sound held strong against prowess. the vocalist's lack of Even though he couldn't he was still an impressive rap- There wasn't much substance to per. their It song the audience had to take a breath before they roared their applause. sing, was boppin' after a and rocking flowed from his The lead vocalist had no qualms about jumping into the audience and belting out rhymes with all his might. Although the lead mic was a little quiet in comparison to the rest of where capti- the music, and it simply too loud and distorted - and not way. The wickedly beefy set that was accentuated by in the cool two bagpiping brothers. band's lack of strength to sound of Wisconsin. This East York band was all about rock 'n roll. Vocalist David perform for the thinning crowd was steal the disappointing. These guys definitely Alberta's Young strutted across the stage toting his cowboy hat and boots, and frequently showed off his ability to wag his tongue. need some more time to get their music straightened out before they offend anyone else. Wisconsin managed to entertain the crowd. At times the audience, more than willing, sound was certainly worth a listen, but they're definitely not ground breaking. 12:00a.m. - Memory Bank Did someone slip some acid etc... etc... didn't let these showered Young with beer spray. The band's pleasing melodic etc... the shortest set of the night) three other acts DAY THREE who were etc... etc... etc... If any band was to probably would have been bands hog the spotlight. around too much as their performance was gripping from beginning to end. mind-blowing Montreal's 5 Line Legacy rocked the house. their Playing tight and heavy tunes, the band's of Madonna's set, To end off they played a cover io:oop.m.-i:ooa.m. The Reverb The Reverb played host to a killer lineup of bands featuring a couple familiars- chick vocalists. She sang with the sultriness pletely tripped out with crazy samples, loops Clarknova and Scratching Post. Although of a jazz master and roared with intensity and some of the heaviest riffs of the these into this it FLU, mixing things up between the and Filter style tunes. The Calgarian Beatles the trio hit stage in fiill makeup and each had plenty of room to rock out on member the large stage. They didn't need to jump Despite the revolting and cliche rock star attitude, show, two bands played fantastic sets (even though headliners Scratching Post played etc... etc... etc... etc... etc.. lead singer was a far cry that held rank with names Disturbed. Later on, the Special Section from most sissy like Korn and Mudmen etc... etc. liked to call it - - or "Mooodonna," as they tune "Music" that was com- Who knew Mooodonna could festival. be so deep? played a etc. etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. April hear certain sounds then they "If kids can't distort them. This program visual feedback that is may 2001 19 Biz/Tech cetera will give kids the really important." - 5, Helen Offman et Baldi teaches deaf children the basics by Geula Bernstein thesis systems for Baldi exist in a single software A package called a Toolkit. computer animated face named Baldi is teaching hearing-impaired children to speak and lip state-of-the-art read, thanks software to developed by a The group of A kit to help parents and teachers work with children on new program may be released as early as this week. Baldi not only talks, but moves his lips, teeth, tongue and jaw just as humans do. movements of the This allows parents, teachers and students to movements made teeth transparent so and tongue. different angles. is make learning to may distort no programs I know of which show where to put your tongue in order to produce a sound. I've seen other computerized programs that provide feedback in the form of a game, but there's nothing that shows specifically how I've 12 at an - Oregon school. "The students report that working with Baldi one of their favourite activities," Cole said. both learning and language skills are %' Vk Oirtntf for tpokfn Unguivi H«v*«vti improving UnfvenXytfCohiraaoaisufdtr dramatically." COURTESY PHOTO The Toolkit can be downloaded onto any Baldi operates through a speech recognizer to Windows computer from http://clsu.cse.ogi.edu, free of charge for non-commercial use by educational insti- to correct your sounds. Along with a parents-friendly version of the Toolkit, a room on the Web site (http://clsr.col- parent's resource orado.edu) what they're supposed to and they're getting direct feedback," she said. The 3D animation, speech recognition, and speech syn- is currently under way. The Web site will is teaching everyone, not just the hearing impaired, to learn new The speech recognizer new dren's speech. may are and a mailing list. In an exciting possibility. Cole says the technology Baldi eventually be used to create animated conversational faces for in Baldi was made by compiling a database of speech from more than 1,000 children, creating a mathematical provide information about the project, applications, frequently asked questions do, correct children. languages, or diagnose and treat speech disorders. tutions and parents. seen 'This program will give kids the visual feedback that really important, so they're seeing Tooflcit "The teachers and speech therapists report that correct lip hear certain sounds then they them," Offman said. "There are CSLU tested the project in a pilot study of deaf students Grades 6 ing impaired children. "If kids can't interaction via The package was designed under University of important for improving the speech of hear- is eclogue school curriculum. According to Helen Offman, a speech language patholoclinic, facial coringuration customize Baldi's speech to correspond to the head can also move around, so kids can see his York Region Tongue modeled trom micro x«fay data of human speech frenetic sequence determines target Colorado Professor Ron Cole's direction, who it. While. talking, Baldi's face can be gist at a Developed at UC Santa Cruz or no knowledge of for Baldi. He also recognizes faulty speech produced by a child and takes steps to help the child correct mouth moving from little tool speech technology to design a speech application this Baldi's Facial Animation: Bafdi comes with an authoring that allows people with researchers in the U.S. children can see Toolkit also is model that recognizes able to judge fine details of chil- whether words spoken by a child pronounced correctly and has a confidence measure used to decide if a child's score is appropriate for the word. Canadian farmers may benefit from foot-and-mouth by Hans Niedermair While is the outbreak of foot-and-mouth disease in Europe has put livestock farmers on high alert, some good may come all over the world of the situation for Canadian farmers. "Canada and the United States are considered two of the very few 'disease-free' countries in the world," said Leslie Ballentine, executive director of the Ontario Farm Animd Council, a non-profit educational organization that represents livestock producers, agri-food organizations and businesses. "There hasn't been an outbreak of foot-and-mouth disease in Canada since 1952, and in They did not have an outbreak since 1967," said Ballentine. 'There are seven different strains at the According Filler moment, but there is always one strain which to Rob Huber, Sausages and Delicatessens Ltd. some precautions for recommended by the Canadian Food Inspection are Agency: Declare • meat, dairy or all other animal products brought back to Canada. • If you have, caution will have to be taken. "We but we the European Union, so there will be a scramble, especially are absolutely aware of [the problems in Europe], have yet to see any effect on our company. Canadian government is make sure farm that the clothing and footwear you during your visit are free wore from soil or manure. Clean and disin- fect your footwear. of clothes I'ic... is etc. also you farm An unnamed Kitchener said that the foot-and-mouth outbreak Dry cleaning • If visitors sumer reaction in Canada, pre- etc. etc... must come 14 greater to the etc. Agency etc... etc. one of fill extent, Australia," said Pomerlau. "However, mouth in 1997 there was an outbreak of foot-and- disease in Taiwan, [which] at the time, produced 50 To fill the void, the Americans increased their production. What happened was that the problem in Taiwan was quickly solved, and the U.S. per cent of Japanese pork imports. was left coming with an over-supply, so pork prices crashed," he said. to Canada, Ballentine said that along with the pre- cautions being taken at airports regarding people arriving from Europe (they are required to walk across a disinfectant mat), protocols are starting to be considered for attendees of domestic livestock shows. Also, a series of meetings are being organized for the Canadian meat. various associations in the livestock industry to increase "Holland and Denmark are major exporters of awareness of the problem. may be some opportunity for degree of the cull in the U.K., a lot of bloodlines have to be replaced, so that will be another opportunity for Canadian and U.S. exporter, etc. B i z / T e c h etc. etc. a threat to us, in the Asian market," she said. "Also, because of the will "We have to remember that the animals are not but that we are a threat to them," she said. Since there have been cases reported in Canadian and U.S. pork exporters, especially etc. is and three countries their shoes are Canada, the U.S., and to a lesser Ballentine agreed. sanitary precautions such as washing and disinfecting all personal effects and equipment that have accompanied them. Source: Canadian Food from Schneider for meat products from all Regarding the possibility of foot-and-mouth disease meat industry usually doesn't fall under normal economic principle anyway. He pointed out however, there may be a demand from abroad be increased the biggest pork exporters in the world to the events in Europe. said that the Holland, there etc. well. curve, but the source farm, they should take additional etc... ver>' likely that This doesn't adhere to the normal supply-and- pork. Inspection soon as it is will by the Japanese, to get more products. Denmark creating He also said that while prices may go up, demand has likely been falling because of con- by anyone who last is meat products as raw material costs have already gone up, especially pork, and demand "Japan and Russia have banned that can source from Schneider Corporation in difficulty for sellers of has been to the U.K. in the recommended. etc. visits Our very good at protecting the live- stock industry," he said. days. visited a while abroad, and before returning home, If vent farm Jacques Pomerlau, the executive director of Canadian Waterloo, there mouth disease and bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE or mad cow disease). farms for 14 days after returning to Canada. • has a opportunity for Canadian exports, but also noted that some Stay away from Canadian • it despite the attention the media has put on both foot-and- Meaty safety tips Here in where very good reputation for breeding cows." Pork International, agreed that there selling prices will rise travellers especially for the Canadian dairy industry, vice president of marketing at has not been an immediate effect on their company's sales the U.S. since 1929. However, the U.K. was until recently 'disease-free'. prevalent somewhere in the world." it>' Pomerlau said that Canada is near its production capacanyway. Last year Canada exported 635, 000 tonnes of pork, to rank as the number one pork exporter This year, that figure is in the world. expected to increase by another 100,000 tonnes. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. 20 April 5, 2001 Sports cetera "So Billy "the geek" Gates was camelclutched into submission by the U.S. feds..." -see et Gates and McMahon J-Students tour Sportsnet by Michelle DaCruz Sportsnet's new tour offered Humber journalism students many good people as we can," Theresa Runstedtier, of audience Daniel Russell, a first-year a great tour, it helped to inform and influ- it ence a relations, said. the chance to see the inner work- "Not only was but lot my of the things One students. have noticed I is of after postgraduate Journalism student, the tour of Sportsnet, I've had a ular sports stations. said he few more of The tours, which were spawned by a letter from a Seneca College because of his love of sports. student, began on Feb. 26 and has vision. ings of one of Canada's most pop- "I is pursuing journalism see this set every day on tele- From my female students say that they want to go into a job possibility the sports broadcasting. I think that's great," Tsuji said. from journalism tour has been pretty valuable. I've students from five local programs, been thinking about going into sports broadcasting has Ryerson. print for a long time, but there slowly to include extend our chance that now attracted interest including "It's brand Humber and a great way to our community of into my A lot of people they think of sports think work at TSN'. We want when 'I'll go to get as a could change Mel Tsuji, said he has received a lot of positive feedback from stu- dents who have taken changed more women. "For so long the sports net- works have been a locker room for mind," Russell said. Broadcast Journalism teacher, viewers, but also to lure prospective talent. I is According to Tsuji, the face of the tour. the old boys. They realize they have to equalize the opportunity. The things I heard from broadcast and networks now is they want more women," Tsuji said. stations Jody Vance, the only female anchor on Sportsnet, said she was unfazed by the prospect of cracking into the network. According to Vance, the novelty of being a female worn off for her anchor has and the audience. Vance said the idea of in sports is women no longer a huge issue, and she has no problem with her specially constructed see-through desk, because she receives free shoes out of the deal. "I think there anybody who er with You gets GIBSON tell it girl: Number journalism shident, Michelle DaCruz some first hand experience interviewing Sportsnet anchor Jody Vance. a is a market for good broadcast- good sports knowledge. That's true J.-UMET is if you're a black man, Asian man, or an Asian woman," Vance said. She said she brings in more fans to Sportsnet not because she April Humber sports Number athletes not the only ones taking advantage of school's sports therapy by Tim Twydell When The Nathan Vandebron saw into the boards and it, felt Vandebron The visit Humber Hawks men's the hockey way," he said. a week after his injury, doing band of shinny Parsons said on a regular day when year Humber's sports teams of all are play- Humber, runs a variety of the "It's injuries. not as busy now but dur- ing the season I'm usually treating and has been the head 35 people a day with the help from each of Humber's varsity team's centre Parsons said he has rehabilitat- ed a TIM TWYDELL vflde range of sports injuries. common injuries "The most come through here for are back, shoulder and ankle that people and shoulders are treated most. the during sports injuries clinic in the athletic back game ing he treats 35 patients a day for athletic therapist since 1995. Foot, in a not acceptable. is including a muscle stimulator. injury Glen Parsons, head Foot massage: sport. with state of the art equipment, plagued athletes. therapist at the injury Humber's clinic has a credible throughout Ontario weeks, Humber's athletic thera- busy with therapist," Parsons said. "I'm still treating about 10 to 15 'A' team by Jason Thorn Every athletes, faculty to students but dominating to the at any ting and Hawk offence Gillespie line. One such duo spavraed fit lose in points while on a line with Barnes. They eventually parted Barnes went on to sign a pro con- the description when tract Alabama with the and Gillespie in Huntsville Tornado Colborne's Junior Humber Hawks. went away to school. Ontario Athletic They played together for a year and half and in their first full sea- for Barnes, so he returned cham- son there Gillespie racked up 88 and started 'A' ranks and was reunited for a run at the College Association men's hockey The pro ranks didn't work out Hawks looking for long-term relationships with ambitious self-motivated Account Managers Head "Joe called OPPORTUNITIES Company times through first ly decided back for commission structure, bonuses and to: Guardian Newspapers 307 Humberline Drive Etobicoke, Ontario all will Barnes arrived at said. Humber he on a line with and speedy winger Chris them before that's probmost fun I have had on a etc... etc... etc. etc. etc... etc. Gillespie after leaving It turned out to be one of the alike lines at the end of think he's all- in off the who is much ice than on, is quieter modest well and it's etc.. "I don't think of guy puck it has a who knows how in the net," really a real boost have a Sports ice," bond even we have lot to do to put the stronger. a pretty how to rack lost in is good just on the said. after a great season Hawks came up just provincial we so short of a championship as they sudden death overtime to Sault College, 5-4. Gillespie netted seven goals he said. They also know Barnes However, the up and got 11 assists with Barnes minutes in the penalty box as they picking up five goals with four combined for 22 minutes worth of helpers on the season. medal game. their day's back penalties in the gold result. their think know where each other with me. Gillespie's just the type I "I seven points in two playoff games. just been elevated about three makes chemistry together about his impact. and Alabama. the season as they accounted for complimented the line's play. "You know, Colin's game has linemate like that." etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... Scott Barnes joined 88 points. Barnes, Teammates and coaches "We know each other be contacted. reunited with Barnes to score most exciting line," Pugliese said. the however only Colin Gillespie fit "I told ably the COURTESY' go to Gillespie wasn't surprised with ttieir interest, those selected for an interview wanted the mid-season acquisition. 675^665 applicants for I all final- I the league," Washurak said, after M9W 5V1 IVe sincerely thank and around one of the best players & or fax (416) summer to school," decibels Box #1385 Mirror Joe Pugliese. Preference will be given to candidates with previous advertising/sales experience. We offer a base salary, an excellent The from coach semester and that When he Gillespie c/o home calls me up a bunch of the in was an instant DISPLAY ADVERTISING car allowance. Apply in confidence to field Washkurak. CAREER Publishing as Colin they laced up the skates for the in Port Humber men's hockey sudden death overtime. Colborne's Port Walls of the men's volleyball team gettherapist Glenn Parsons. year Barnes and Gillespie helped bring the gold medal game only to Dunnville native Scott Barnes dynamic duo or a That's the spot: Carter back therapy from clinic it has slowed dovm." this pionship this year. good hockey team level has a and reunited TIMT\NTDiaL anywhere from patients a day, Linemates sparked Linemates since Junior and faculty too students reputation to build sports concluding in the last two still - Twisting your ankle up the muscles in his ankle. With all of number's varsity is team pating in a ultrasound and stretching exercises writh a resistance work at referral has to be incurred while partici- four times 21 stu- all for team, visited the clinic to with a from a physician. went into the boards the wrong pist open is free is But there's a catch Vandebron, a defencemen was looking for the puck and clinic an athletic trainer. clinic, 2001 Parsons said. injuries," dents and for four weeks. His next option was to smashed something twist. "I was a injury resulting sprained ankle, which sidelined the puck coming towards him, he raced over to hard clinic still 5, Friends since Both Gillespie and Barnes are studying Business home, Gillespie and Barnes are Humber when roommates ice. in Toronto and that etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... Management at on the they're not etc... etc... etc... etc... April 5, 2001 22 McMahon to wrestle Gates and Vince McMahon They Gates. park bench meets there on the sit telling Bill each other the Then him a dropkick of their success. secrets McMahon gives and "Stone Cold" stuns into next McMahon, week. ing over the limp about gloats ass his stand- victory his over and best of all over the American government. Now, how can one compare Vince to Bill, fans of ath- of "Stone lete/actors, the likes Cold" Steve Austin, 'The Rock," who By doing so he changed a mula from one of been lagging behind bit for- players and driven, muscle pounding, When raw strength WCW folding and it aire tain week on Raw, McMahon Last added the final nail into WCW the by steamrolling his into last oblivion and Sure telling is WCW music videos. week a before in front of the capacity er manufacturer a small He steamrolled over tion in his comput- all Austin Now parison. Jamie S. Kokiw competi- fair and honest U.S. government. wasn't able to hold on to Boardwalk and Park Place anymore. faced while climbing his way to stole marquee acts that limited the rise of pro wrestling leagues. The biggest speed bump his WWF faced on its way to the top was Ted Turner's WCW the elephant burial ground for the aged and broken-down pieces of beloved McMahon took struggling World over a Wrestling Federation, replaced aged and rusting acts such as Hulk Hogan, out of McMahon's chance same you'll need sails. mes it as belles much pitcher. fate face seems inevitable. getting back to the the playoff crunch com- ToromtQ Maple Leafs Billy "the geek" Gates was 86 points - games rem.aining 3 the WWF. by the US feds when his business - were seen as unfair and tactics one which created a monopoly the field of technology and @ home vs. Islanders - @ Chicago @ Ottawa - in com- puters. 84 points - games remaining 3 Can't the same be said for McMahon's tactics when it comes @Rangers -@ home vs.Atlanta -@home vs. Pittsburgh to the world of Sports entertain- ment? Up until the last SostQn Prmns Monday he owned Company, Electric 84 points - games remaining 3 ' Sumivier Jobs @Buffalo is - @New Jersey - (ffihomie vs. Islanders PAPERS TYPED Neat appearance, correct spelling, grammar, punctuation etc. $1 .50/$2.00 pp. College Pro Painters Graphics, tables extra. Christine 416-252-7127 presently looking for CUSTOM ESSAYS responsible/hardworking University or College students for: subjects including Humanities, All Part Time ~ Marketing Full Time-Painting positions in March positions from & April English, Business, Accounting, History, Psychology, May-August No Experience Required If Political Administration 1-800-465-2839 www.collegepro.com 416-960-9042 ClassifieJ cost Positions available throughout Ontario is '10 per issue, Each aJditiimal word To hook your etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... Sports and more. customessay @ sprintca is etc... etc... etc... etc... 20 word maximum. 7"'ii GST. 15*', plus classified ad please call Nikki Koeller at (416) Oeadiine is Fridav 11! noon prior etc... Science, Editing, composition, writing, research. interested call or apply online at etc... etc... as the Jays need a bonefide starting Maple Leafs "Camel-clutched" into submission Any competition McMahon the top he bought out, absorbed or Gates had a monopoly, there- Vince So way, then conceded in an anti-trust lawsuit brought forth by the ever tilt into a it air Bon unfair evil busi- ness tyrants face the thumbs up and down approach company. and built multi-gazillion dollar up to the challenge and take a little femmes, all that Cleveland he conducted in who he should keep from new toy. Well Hogan seems to be on his way out, however a Goldberg - Michael and Janet Jackson Gates took rise (the govern- target) only put out Shouldn't said, their apart.... Bill new is WOW (Women Of Wrestling) can Microsoft was only a software ment's crowd as easy as With that ridiculousness pro wrestling's only hope as well? MTV set ref only wrestling, but it's developer and into Comparing the two Vinny's a multi-gazillion- ment charge them , up the match of the century with Vince McMahon and Bill Gates in one corner, Bill Clinton and George W. in the other and IBM's "Deep Blue" as the guest make his who has achieved his mounof money by conducting busi- announcing the purchase of the a to Shouldn't the U.S. govern- Then into one of buy Boardwalk, ' Maybe McMahon' should needed ness warfare atrocities. WrestleMania X-Seven. it's to All he Gates did? monopoly complete. again. competition cle? fore was much pretty well, the whole board. Now the signs were pointing coffin and specta- increased athleticism their pay-per- fading into existence, Vince did transformation from a mere exhibition of "Raw", Waterworks, view spectacles. white trash bashing and romantitoday. WWF's the cizing entity that it is the ratings far in "Smackdown" and lackluster entertainment into the sex over the past years has towards the Generation X. have been pro wrestling and seen WCW and the ever popular group De- uninformed to the echelons of society new diamond-plated fresh body of Gates the American public adversity, "Macho Man" Randy Savage and "Mean" Jean Oakerland with etc... 6754390 ext. 231 to the ne\t puhlication etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc April 5, 2001 23 Bizzartifacts et cetera What's your sign? photo of the week your birthday: Happy Birthday If today isn't your birthday: Tough If today |%/l^ is be afraid to be picky, though. Aries March - 19 April J * The stars are aligned in your favour. The celestial balance is on your side... And a comet will smash into your garage. These 21 — 1 come things always mean, manually harvesting semen may pay well, b twist on the traditional curling iron. You're sure to make mil- though a lot of people prefer with stones. ftt't^l Gemini 11 21 "^ City, will go to Quebec protest for the rights of other countries to determine their own destiny. There presence, police Canada, bit like a they'll but as Nov - 22 There Toyota Corolla 1 23 August - 22 Sept ^"W As J^m is the custom, you will party with your fellow silly, flirt and subsequently alienate Welcome to the we We hear you jQEj Aquarius - 18 Feb do you get when you Coxwell and a a 21 Jan 23 Sept - 22 Oct You have finally reached combine the where you're Spadina? age all guys are NOT If you're not careful, a bad case of DVP! You have Pisces that challenge you emotionally 19 for the school year. Don't bet ^^ '""' What Libra mature, involved relationships money You real world! all big roar. do. 22 June - 22 July As you search for your into like power of the moon on the tides. are introduced to politics. Venus before you, power of the Like Goddess sublimes from you And thus you office 22 Dec - 20 Jan Cancer translate it's feminine the the pretty sure that can think I Capricorn ' the majority of your classmates. tears" tear sweat Dec a disturbance the force-skin. in graduating students, get it's summer job, just rememthat a little bit of summer 21 is Virgo gas. ber Sagittarius caught your zipper. be using Johnson & Johnson "No more and to be a will conceives, Now that's hockey! music rave that Nov shoots, he scores! ovulates, but didja engine in high revs? with, May - 20 June You I and related really your ingenious new for to curl delivers. notice sounds a A hearty congratulations lions, She 23 July - 22 August Not ever 20 April 23 Oct - 21 Leo horoscopes, i - 20 May Scorpio but... He in threes. Taurus I bull and jeuvenile pigs. intellectually. And don't be when your dale sugyou wear a skirt while suspicious gests bungee-jumping. Kiss Feb - 20 March Good things come those who wait. Bad tips come those who waitress. Who No Monkey Business wing on Monday, burying other people's nuts. to to 1. First chimp into space and popu- where Monks hang Building 3. Clothing store: 4. George of the Project X out. Republic. (and Ferris Bueller) star. Monkees guitarist Michael Monkees song: Daydream 6. 7. First 8. name of 'Gorillas . . in the Mist' star. Easy one: King 9. 10. 12. Matt Leblanc's baseball chimp. Finish Monkee name: the Mickey 13. Velvet song National : 15. Curious Best place to find "If you're sending someone some styrofoam, what do you pack it in?" "I went for a ^valk last night and my kids asked me how long I'd been gone. I said. The whole time.*" "Why do they sterilize needles for lethal ixuections?" "I just got skylights at my place. The people who live monkeys in ooz gi86j030>ixas ei zuaioa Zl P3 Aaujno6rs S Ja/vsiisq g 9|6unl "Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste fimny?" ANSWERS etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc... etc. "Last night I played a blank tape at fiill blast. The mime next door went nuts." "If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?" "Whatever happened to preparations A through G?" "If olive oO comes from olives, 'wiiere does baby oil "How come abbreviated is such a long word?" . Toronto. etc. big." above me are furious." Gorilla. 14. Quotes from the twisted mind of George Carlin come from?" . David Schwimmer's "Friends' monkey. 11. and 'The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life." "Some people think of the glass as half fidl. Som^e people think of the glass as half empty. I think of the glass as too sandwich meat. 2. 5. likes hiking, scurrying, knew? crossword cims lar my furry little ass - Pepsi, a five-month-old ferret mak- ing the rounds in L ^ euBueq U '/ 01 6uox 6 UiqssN 9 )|3U3pojg |30iEV^ E AjaisBUOiu j lubh Bizzartifacts "Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?" t etc... etc. etc. etc. etc. etc... etc... etc. etc. etc... students' ^SSS^ FEDERATION -,•»( r HSF Service of the Month "X Student Government Elections Results The Humber participate in Students' Federation "Memories Image photographers ^ -'^ for the Friday April 20 9:00am 3:30pm "Convocation Week" Monday June 11 -Thursday June 14 9:00am-4:30pm Friday June 15 9:00am-3:30pm Pulla HSF Vice President-Campus Life North: Stephen Anastasi HSF Vice President-Campus Life Lakeshore: Raj Gogna HSF Vice President- Administration North: Adam Hackett HSF be on the Humber NorUi Campus Monday April 16-Thursday April 19 9:00am - 4:30pm 2001/2002 school year: HSF President: John will College campuses taking graduation photos on the following dates: to the new HSF Executive ^S excited to is in the Making". Student Vice President-Administration Lakeshore: Craig - Lakeshore Campus Tuesday April Wilson 10- Wednesday April 11 9:00am - 4:30pm | GRADUATION photos, please stop by one HSF offices located in Room KX105 at the North To book your The HSF would also like to extend a thank you to all those who ran for a position with the HSF and to all those that voted March 20-22. the Campus or in Room AXlOl '•vl.Vr HSF Buy & Sell Board The Humber Students' Federation encourages one all to visit the HSF Buy & (www^.hsfweb.com). This provided for the entire M^ a is Sell FREE • and The Easter Bunny Board Thursday, April classified service College community. Categories include: campuses. Each Rentals • Services It's FAST It's EASY FREE It's [pick ^ from the egg hunt can be claimed until Monday, April 30. HOP by one of th HSF Join us at the Renaissance Conventions ^ Or offices located in Room KXIO5 at the Campus or in Room AXlOl Lakeshore Campus. better yet, contact Lance Lougheed at (4l6) Room KX105 North Campus or Room r'Th^W'"^ i< 252-8283. the at the ^^ /y^ik— ^" Lakeshore Campus. Mission Statement and For more information or to purchase tickets, please drop by one of the at the Prizes Humber Students' Federation To advocate on behalf of the membership of the Humber Students' Federation, to protect the quality of education and student life at Humber College of Applied Arts and College community, so be sure to get your North m Good Luck and Good Hunting! Banquet Centre on Thursday, April 26 for the annual year-end celebration. The event is open to the entire HSF ! AXlOl I Year End Semi-Formal Gala tickets early. and Lakeshore of the eggs will offices located in Follow the link www.hsfweb.com/list.php The HSF Buy & Sell Board is accessible throughout the yearJ Humber 12. on his way to Humber College on The Easter Bunny will be leaving up an egg and see what you WIN I at Note: is contain a prize, so be sure to Announcements "Automobiles Books • Computers and Software • '««l«,««*|MB»iS«, prize filled eggs at both the North Humber General Merchandise the Lakeshore Campus. Easter Egg Hunt • • at of I Technology, to improve and increase the services provided] to students of such College, and to promote student participation and awareness. The Humber Students' Federation a student owned and operated corporation, whose greatest asset is the students themselves. is HSF President Toby Wamell and Stephen Anastasi HSF Vice President-Campus Life North present an award to Director of Athletics Doug Fox
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