babyshambles beg borrow lyric steal

Ireland’s
STUDENT
NEWSPAPER
Of
The
Year
Trinity News
2005
Ireland’s Oldest Student Newspaper
Est. 1947
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
trinity.news@tcd.ie
Rising Stars: Steve
Clarke meets Bell X1
MUSIC
page 12
Vol.58 No.5
CilIian Murphy
TNT
Interview
Chomsky apologises to students for
lecture cancellation
Speech moved from Trinity to RDS,
Three UCD lectures go ahead as planned
David Molloy
Controversial American academic
Noam Chomsky cancelled a scheduled lecture in Trinity College last
Wednesday due to excess demand
for tickets, while three UCD lectures went ahead as planned.
Professor Chomsky apologised to
students for the cancellation and
said he hoped to return to Trinity in
the future.
Chomsky was scheduled
to deliver an Amnesty International
lecture on ‘The War on Terror’ in
the Ed Burke Theatre last
Wednesday, January 18. But the
speech was switched to the RDS at
a late stage because the Trinity lecture hall was too small to cope with
the demand for tickets. He was set
to be the most high profile visitor
to Trinity of the year.
Prof Chomsky, 77, is a
world renowned linguist and critic
of American foreign policy who
has been named as ‘the world’s
most cited living author.’
The left wing intellectual
also turned down an invitation
from the University Philosophical
Society to address Trinity students
in the Graduate’s Memorial
Building. His office told the Phil
that he could not accept an honorary patronage of the society as
his schedule was already full.
Meanwhile,
Prof
Chomsky delivered three lectures
at University College Dublin,
including an address to UCD’s student debating societies, the
Literary and Historical Society and
Philsoc. Over 3,000 UCD students,
staff and guests crammed into the
O’Reilly Hall to see Chomsky on
Tuesday, Thursday and Friday last.
Chomsky also took part
in a book signing in Tower Records
and a private address to the
Institute of European Affairs during his short visit to Dublin which
ended on Friday.
Prof Chomsky offered a
personal apology to Trinity students for the cancellation and
expressed a desire to visit the
Inside
SU Nominations Open
Get the lowdown on the latest cabdidate rumours
See page 2
Society Funding
Enda Hargaden looks at how much each society got this year
See page 18
Rail Rip-Off?
Anne Marie Ryan looks at differences in student rail discounts
See page 6
How Much is Too Much?
College in the future.
In an email to Trinity
News, Prof Chomsky said, “I'm
afraid I can't help. I had nothing to
do with the locations of lectures.
All arrangements were made by
Amnesty International.”
“I'd be pleased if you
could convey my apologies to students and others at Trinity who
were left out in these arrangements.” He added, “I hope it will
be taken care of in some later visit,
not too long delayed, I hope.”
According to a College
spokesperson, the decision to move
the lecture from Trinity was a taken
jointly by Trinity College and
Amnesty
International
Irish
Section. The College originally
considered a video link between
the Ed Burke lecture theatre and
the Examination Hall in order to
provide extra seating. But the
demand for tickets was far beyond
expectation, the College said. As a
result the venue was changed to the
1800 seater Shelbourne Hall in the
RDS. Trinity College retained a
role in organising the event.
A further lecture could
not be arranged, according to
Amnesty Ireland. “Unfortunately,
his schedule does not permit him to
speak to any of these groups [universities], as he will only be in
Ireland for a short time and doing
media work, etc. as well as his talk
on the 18th.”
Trinity students and staff
were originally allocated 150
places for this event, and received
only an extra 25 tickets after the
venue change, despite the greatly
increased capacity.
Chomsky made headlines when he told the audience
that Ireland may be complicit in
“the supreme international crime.”
Described by Bono as
‘the Elvis of academia’, Chomsky
is
currently
Professor
of
Linguistics in the Massachusetts
Institute of Technology. In recent
years, he has become better known
for his opposition to American foreign policy, notably the Vietnam
War.
Academic Noam Chomsky speaking at the Amnesty International lecture at the RDS last Wednesday
Photo: Dara MacDonaill courtesy of the The Irish Times
Ocean Colour Scene set to play Ball
John Lavelle
Ocean Colour Scene are expected
to be announced as the first of the
headline acts for this year’s Trinity
Ball later this week, Trinity News
can reveal. A source close to Ents
Officer Niall Hughes said that a
deal had already been struck with
the Manchester band.
According to the source,
Ocean Colour Scene agreed to play
the Ball early last week. He added
that a number of up and coming
acts would be added to the lineup
the price rise was “in line
with inflation.” Tickets are
expected to be made available for sale within the next
few weeks.
The rock band
achieved critical acclaim
with their debut album
Moseley Shoals, released in
1996 at the heyday of britpop. Their first single ‘The
Riverboat Song’ was made
famous as the theme tune of
Chris Evans’ TFI Friday.
Since then the band has had
mixed success with their lat-
at a later stage.
Mr Hughes said
that nothing has been
finalised yet but he told
students to “expect a
major announcement in
the next few days.” MCD
promotions, which is
organising the Ball in
association with Trinity
Ents was unwilling to
comment on the matter.
Meanwhile, the
price of tickets is set to
rise to €74, up €4 from
last year. Hughes said that
est album A Hyperactive Workout
for the Flying Squad only reaching
number 30 in the British charts.
The
band,
once
described by Noel Gallgher as “the
second best band in Britain,” have
previously been booked by MCD
to play the Slane Festival in 2002
and Oxegen in 2004.
Ocean Colour Scene are
already advertising a number of
gigs in Ireland in early May before
the Trinity Ball, which will take
place on Friday, May 12.
Trinity Ball in depth:
Page 4
Christine Bohan looks at Trinity students’ drinking habits
See page 2-3 TNT
Trinity News Two
TNT returns wih features, columns, politics, books, theatre and more!
See supplement
Index
College News p1-3
News Feature p4
National p6
International p7
Features p8-10
Film p11
Music p12-13
Food & Drink p14-15
Travel p16
Careers p17
Kearney makes first move
towards modularisation
John Lavelle
SU & Societies p18
Comment & Opinion
p19-20
Letters p21
Gaeilge p22
Inter’l Students p23
Science p24
Sports Features p25-26
Sport p27-28
Look out for Issue 6 in Week 6!
Trinity academics have begun discussions about introducing a modularised degree programme to the
College. In what is being seen as a
highly significant development,
the prospect of modularisation was
raised by the Senior Lecturer,
Colm Kearney at a meeting of the
heads of department two weeks
ago.
Before
Christmas,
Trinity News reported that Prof
Kearney had introduced a proposal
to scrap scholarship exams.
If introduced, modularisation would mean a radical overhaul of Trinity’s course programmes. Individual subjects
would be sub-divided into shorter
‘modules’. The final examinations
for each module would take place
Kearney: Reform
during the academic year instead
of in May. Modularisation could
also mean more emphasis on continuous assessment and more flexible subject choices.
Advocates of a modular
system point to the reduced
emphasis on end of year exams and
the greater choice that it can offer
students. Critics say that the system increases pressure on students
because of more frequent examinations and encourages students to
forget about a subject once a module is completed.
Some courses in Trinity
already have modular structures,
most notably Engineering.
Prof Kearney, who takes
charge of the academic affairs of
the College, told Trinity News that
the next meeting of the heads of
department “would discuss the
academic portfolio on offer,
including the possibility of modularisation.”
He added that following
restructuring, it was now “an
appropriate time” to review the
courses available in Trinity and
Continued Page 3
Trinity FM in
piracy cock up
Sarah Hickey
Campus radio outlet Trinity FM
could face criminal prosecution
after the station was forced to stop
broadcasting last week when it
was discovered that it was transmitting illegally. Under piracy law,
the station could also be subject to
large fines and confiscation of
equipment if the authorities decide
to pursue action.
On Thursday afternoon
the plug was pulled on a broadcast
when it was realised that Trinity
FM's license with the Broadcasting
Commission of Ireland did not
cover the broadcast. In effect this
meant that from Monday to
Thursday the station was broadcasting on 97.3FM as a pirate sta-
tion and could be subject to criminal prosecution.
A source close to the station told Trinity News that the situation came about due to a mix up
in communications between the
station and the BCI about the dates
for broadcasting in this term.
Trinity FM is only licensed to
broadcast for three weeks in Hilary
and Trinity term. The dates for the
first of these weeks were mistakenly taken to be January 16 to 20.
The station has not made clear
what the actual agreed dates were.
Radio piracy is an
offence taken very seriously by the
BCI with several recent raids on
pirate operations in Cork and
Dublin. While in the case of
Trinity FM the piracy was claimed
Continued Page 3
2
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
News Editor: John Lavelle
Trinity News
COLLEGENEWS
Rumours fly as SU nominations open
All positions set to be contested
Úna Faulkner
Nominations for this year’s
Students’ Union sabbatical elections opened on Tuesday, January
17 and already there are candidates
confirmed for each of the five
positions, with one candidate,
Shane O’Brien, running in all
races.
The most sought after
position this year appears to be
president, with five candidates so
far confirmed to be running. The
first name to be appearing on the
ballot paper will be that of John
McGuirk. The right winger, who is
a pro Nestle and Coke campaigner
and veteran of the Hist and Phil,
has been rumoured for many
months to be interested in the job.
Following him will be
the name of fourth year economics
student Harman Murtagh. Murtagh
has a sports background and is a
well known figure around college,
and it is anticipated he will provide
stiff competition for others running
for president.
Those who have been
following SU politics over the past
year will not be surprised to hear
that third year BESS student and
SU enthusiast, David Quinn, is
also running for the coveted posi-
tion. Quinn, the current chair of
Students’ Union Council is running against former school friend,
John Tracey, a second year theoretical physics student.
The fifth candidate is JS
Engineering
student,
Shane
O’Brien. O’Brien, who ran for the
position of deputy president last
year, has decided to run for all five
positions. This move is unprecedented as no candidate has ever
attempted to run for all five sabbatical positions in the history of the
Union.
Unlike last year, whenthe position of deputy president
was sought by four candidates, this
year the job has only been found
appealing by one other candidate
in addition to Shane O’Brien.
Simon Hall, a 2nd year science student and writer for the University
Record had been rumourd to be
intesteted in the poisition for quite
some time.
The offices of welfare
and education are not as hotly contested as that of president, with
only one candidate, besides from
Shane O’Brien, confirmed for each
of the positions so far.
In the race for education
officer, which has never before
gone uncontested, only one other
candidate has so far declared. fo
Alex Gilliland is currently convenor for the School of
Engineering and System Sciences,
However, there are still
unconfirmed reports that TNT
Editor and CSC Secretary,
Christine Bohan, may be running
for education officer. Bohan has
declined to comment on the possibility of her standing.
Denise Keogh, a fourth
year computer engineerng student
has announced her intention of
running for the position of welfare
officer. Keogh is this year’s
Equality and Equality of Access
Officer for the Students’ Union.
Also rumoured to be contemplating a run for welfare is the Catholic
hard liner Peter Henry.
The position of ents
officer has four confirmed candidates in the running so far. Ross
Mulcahy, president of the Sci-Fi
Society, has decided to join Shane
O’Brien in the race. It is thought
likely that they will be running
against two members of the Ents
crew - Jane Cassidy, fourth year
music, and Barry Murphy, third
year pharmacy.
Nominations close on
Tuesday, January 31 wih election
campaigns for all five positions
starting on Monday, February 13.
Clockwise from top left: John McGuirk, Harman Murtagh, Shane O’Brien, John Tracey and David Quinn
Book of Kells will never
leave Trinity again
Provost goes to India
in search of students
Katie Watson
Trinity College is to become the
first Irish university to establish an
office in India, it was announceed
last week. The new office in Delhi
will open in the summer in order to
“try and raise Trinity’s profile” in
the country.
The Provost, Dr John
Hegarty and other senior Trinity
figures are currently on a tour of
India along with Education
Minister Mary Hanafin and Irish
business leaders.
The opening of the new
office is part of a drive to recruit
more international post graduates
to the College, particularly in the
area of science and technology.
The
Minister
for
Education,
Mary
Hanafin
addressed fears that increasing
numbers of international students
would take away spots in the
College from Irish students. She
stated that drive to recruit international students has nothing to do
with taking places away from Irish
Provost John Hegarty: Tour of India
students, saying that it is about
bringing top ranking Indian students into Ireland.
Trinity receives in the
region of €5,000 per year from
Irish undergraduates. Non EU students taking the same courses can
pay up to €23,000 per year,
depending on their area of study.
In a statement released
by the College, the Provost
explained, “Trinity hopes to build
new bridges with modern India as
we have complementary interests
in scholarship, education and
research.”
According
to
the
College, the Delhi office and the
increase in international students
will make Trinity a more competitive and more highly regarded university. It will also well as providing Irish students with connections
and opportunities to pursue their
studies in India.
This year there are 65
Indian students attending Trinity,
mainly in post graduate courses. To
encourage interest and competition
at post graduate level, Trinity has
created 65 research PhD studentships which will cover the full
tuition costs and also provide a
stipend for these students.
Trinity has centuries'
long associations with India, and
many of its graduates served in
India during the colonial period.
There were lecturers in Hindi and
Sanskrit in the College from the
1860s.
Among the graduates to
make a life in India was Sir George
Grierson (1851-1941), civil servant, linguist and folklorist from
south Dublin. His work is seen as
the foundation stone for Indian linguistics and contributed greatly to
the modern understanding of the
prehistoric links between Indian
and European languages.
Graduates of the university also established an Anglican
mission in Chota Nagpur near
Calcutta in 1891.
Trinity news
3
The Book of Kells, the most
famous and important work in
Trinity College’s extensive collection, will never leave Trinity
College again. The College has
issued a new policy preventing the
book from being lent to other institutions for the purposes of exhibition.
The College Librarian
Robin Adams told the Irish Times
that he didn’t believe the book
would “ever travel again.” He was
speaking after the College turned
down a loan request for the Book
of Kells from a Japanese exhibitioner.
9
9
7 6
3
7
8 2
1
9
6
1
8
3
8
1
5
3
2
6
4
7
5 6
1
2
8 6
2
1
4
7
send the book despite recommendations from both the Council of
Cultural Institutions and also the
then arts minister, Sile de Valera, to
refuse the request.
The College has been
home to the Book of Kells since
Henry Jones, the Bishop of Meath
presented it to the college library in
1661. In a change of policy the
College Board has decided not to
make any of the volumes available
to other exhibitors.
The Book of Kells has
only traveled abroad three times in
the twentieth century, and when
Kells Urban District Council put in
an application to borrow a volume
after the ill-fated trip to Australia,
it was turned down.
Student dies in Buttery
Jonathan Drennan
Tragedy struck in the Buttery last
Wednesday when a student collapsed and subsequently died. The
female mature student, thought to
be in her forties, suffered a heart
attack on the premises to the considerable shock of all present.
An ambulance was
called by Buttery staff and the
woman was rushed to St James’
Hospital. She died after a short
time in hospital and relatives and
friends were notified soon after.
The woman was a
mature student who had started an
arts degree to broaden previous
interests in her chosen subject.
Her death has shocked
and saddened the whole Trinity
community.
SUDOKU
HARD
MEDIUM
EASY
7
Dr Adams has described
this particular application as a
“general request”, and he went on
to state that “it is the Board's policy that the manuscript is not loaned
to other institutions, so the request
was declined.”
There is some suggestion that this alteration in policy
has occurred as a result of pigment
damage done to one volume of the
book whilst in transit to Australia
during its last trip abroad in 2000.
On this trip the loaned
volume of the famous book was
exhibited at the National Gallery in
Canberra. The damage has been
described by the College as a
“change in condition”.
The College decided to
Anna Stein
8
2
6
3 6
2
1
7 9
6
3
5
1
5
7
9
4
1
5
3
5
5
2
3
9 3 7
5
6
5 3
5
2
1
7
1
6
5
2 4
8
2
8 1
7
9
9
5 1
7
1
4
8 5 6
7 2
8
Assistant News Editor: Úna Faulkner
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
3
COLLEGENEWS
News in Brief Coke ban costing SU €15,000 a year
Trinity’s oldest living
fellow dies at 103
The oldest living fellow of Trinity
College died last Thursday of natural causes. He was 103 years
old.
Prof George Alexander
Duncan was the Professor of
Political Economy from 1932 to
1967. Duncan became a fellow of
the college at 27 and went on to
become a professor two years
later.
Prof Duncan acted as
an economic advisor to the De
Valera government in the thirties
and forties.
The Trinity flag was
flown at half mastabove the
College on Thursday as a mark of
respect.
Oscar winning director
films at the Hist
It was lights, camera, action at
the Historical society last
Wednesday night as an Oscar
winning film director recorded
the society’s euthanasia debate
for a Canadian documentary.
Guests at the Hist
debate included Mr Ludwig
Minnelli, founder of Dignitas,
who travelled to Ireland from
Zurich to give his account of
organising assisted suicides and
campaigning for euthanasia.
There were also speakers from
the US and Britain.
Documentary director
John Zaritsky, who won his
Academy Award for Just Another
Missing Kid, filmed the debate
for a documentary on assisted
suicide and Dignitas for CTV of
Canada and Discovery Times in
the United States.
The documentary will
premiere in the autumn and is
likely to be shown on Channel 4
later in the year. The film will
follow the course of Mr
Minnelli’s work, which often
inspires controversy abroad due
to patients joining him from
countries where euthanasia is not
accepted.
Mr Minelli told the
audience at the Graduates’
Memorial Building that 70 per
cent of those who contact
Dignitas do not follow through
with the assisted suicide.
The
Philosophical
Society provoked the ire of the
Hist committee by refusing the
film crew access to its balcony to
gain an overhead shot of proceedings.
DUST, House 6 shop, Ents and Record all lose money in 2005
Jonathan Drennan
The Students’ Union’s ban on selling Coca-Cola products in their
shops is costing the organisation
€15,000 per year in lost revenue
and increased costs. The revelation
came to light in the SU’s accounts
for 2005, obtained by Trinity News.
In 2004 students voted to
ban Coca-Cola products from
Students’ Union shops in House 6,
the Hamilton and St James’
Hospital because of allegations
human rights abuses against the
company.
€15,000 was written off
by the Union at the start of the last
financial year in anticipation of
lower sales. It is believed that the
figure also takes account of costs
incurred by the SU in escaping
from contracts with Coke over
fridge space in the shops.
Overall the Union’s
finances are only marginally
improved on last year, with a loss
of almost €21,000 for 2005. The
figure is down from the deficit of
€43,500 incurred in 2004.
The Coke ban seems to
have hit the House 6 shop particularly hard and it managed to lose
€500 in 2005. This is a huge drop
from the profit of €56,458 the previous year. The downturn in fortunes for the premises has been
blamed on a lack of interest from
the student populace who are opting for various alternatives in the
city centre.
DUST has showed signs
of improvement but the travel
agent is still losing money for the
Union. A newly formed partnership with Sayit and increased
themed deals are encouraging
more students to use the service
than ever before. SU President
John Mannion says he is confident
that a profit making business is a
not far on the horizon.
“DUST is fine and we
think we’ll make a profit,” he said.
Students’ Union
Finances 2005
Key Figures:
Total Deficit
€
20,937
Travelcard Profit
Bookshop Profit
Pool Table Profit
40,425
3,796
5,469
House 6 Shop Loss
500
Hamilton Shop Loss
4,795
St James’ Shop Loss 12,478
University Record Loss 4,861
Ents Loss
2,690
Officers’ Expenses
46,462
“I think it can break even at least in
the next while, I want to give it a
chance, we have the Sayit partnership so this business is not a millstone as far is the SU is concerned.”
In terms of the sabbatical
officers’ own salaries and expenses, the budget revealed an
increase in on both accounts.
Officers’ expenses have increased
to around €9,500 each per year
on average.
Mr Mannion blamed the
increase in expenses on the officers’ accommodation costs, saying, “of our €49,000 spent,
€31,000 goes on our accommodation. We are paying for superior
rooms and we also need rooms for
training.”
Free rooms on campus
are provided to each of the officers for 53 weeks a year.
Sabbatical
officers
salaries have increased to over
Modular
courses
in the
pipeline
Continued from Page 1
Publications alumni
return for celebration
Contributors to Trinity College
publications both past and present
gathered last weekend to celebrate over a century of student
newspapers and magazines in the
College. The two day event was
organised by Trinity Publications,
the student body responsible for
producing Miscellany, Icarus,
Pirhana and Trinity News.
Friday evening saw
alumni and students gather for
Commons dinner, followed by a
black tie reception at the
Davenport Hotel on Saturday
night.
The congregation was
addressed by chief critic of the
Irish Independent Bruce Arnold,
the journalist who almost ended
Charles Haughey’s career in the
eighties when it emerged government ministers had ordered his
phone calls to be recorded. Mr
Arnold spoke fondly of his days
as editor of Icarus and TCD
Miscellany while a student in the
early sixties.
The receptions were
attended by a host of stars from
the world of journalism, in
Ireland and the UK.
Organised by Trinity
Publications Alumni Officer
David Symington, the alumni
weekend was the first event of its
kind.
Jonathon Drennan, Fox Alexander and Kurt
Templer
Some Might Say
€12,000 each per year as a result
of national wage agreements.
On a positive note for the
SU, revenue from Student
Travelcards has surged. Revenue
from selling the cards doubled to
over €170,000. The JCR at
Goldsmith Hall has had an upturn
in fortunes after losing money over
previous years. A new system of
administration has been been put in
place with improved advertising
and equipment leading to an
increase of student customers from
the all over campus with particular
prominence to the Hamilton buildings.
Ents events made a loss
of €2,500 last year, compared to
€22,000 in 2004. The Union’s
newspaper, The University Record,
and other publications had a combined loss of €5,000.
The total amount spent
by the Students’ Union last year
was €650,730.
The LGBT society have launched a campaign to have the rainbow flag flown over Trinity College for Rainbow Week
Trinity FM: The pirates of House 6
Continued fromPage 1
to be unintentional the station
could still be subject to action
taken against them by BCI. This
could take a variety of forms
including fines, confiscation of
equipment, denial of further
license requests or even a legal suit
against the station. However as the
station is not a capitated body any
legal action would effectively be
against the Central Societies
Committee.
The source close to
Trinity FM was keen to highlight
the fact that the relationship
between the BCI and the station
remained amicable and that both
bodies were working together to
resolve the matter. Furthermore it
was stressed that procedures are
being put in place to prevent the
situation arising again. The
chances, they said, of serious
action by BCI were probably slim.
This embarrassing mixup occurred at an unfortunate time
for the college station with the
recent agreement of a new sponsorship partnership with a prominent music retailer. This deal was
due to be rolled out for the next
broadcast due in Rag Week however possible action by the BCI could
jeopardise this agreement.
Trinity FM continued to
stream live on their website after
the radio transmitter had been
turned off as their streaming
license was not affected by the mix
up. Members who had shows
timetabled for Thursday evening
and Friday did not loose their slots.
Trinity FM hopes to broadcast
again in Rag Week once the current
issues with the BCI have been
ironed out.
that he was “giving College the
opportunity to see if modularisation was something that it might
want to consider.”
The Senior Lecturer
emphasised that discussions were
at a very early stage and said it
was “far too early” to talk about
any advantages that modularisation could offer.
Prof Kearney’s move
mirrors the recent trend towards
modularisation in other Irish universities. University College
Dublin launched its UCD
Horizons programme last year
with much fanfare and Dublin
College University, University
College Cork and Dublin Institute
of Technology all make wide use
of modular course structures.
A previous attempt to
introduce modularisation in
Trinity in the mid nineties was
abandoned because of opposition
from staff and students.
Speaking to class reps
last week, Students’ Union
Education
Officer
Donal
McCormack
said,
“Modularisation is something that
we’re going to be hearing a lot
more about over the next few
months.”
Compiled by John Lavelle
“I hope it will be taken care of in some later visit.
Not too long delayed, I hope.”
Noam Chomsky, ‘the Elvis of academia’, speaks of his wish to
return to Ireland and visit Trinity College in the future. Prof
Chomsky is 77
“Life in College can be as exciting and as enriching as you wish (or have time) to make it.”
The new ‘TCD Life’ website wastes no time rolling out
the cheesy clichés
“I intend to transform the way in which legal
costs are determined.”
Minister for Justice Michael McDowell uses a visit to the
Historical Society to announce major legal reform
The Numbers Game
Compiled by John Lavelle
30
The percentage of Trinity students who regularly
drink to excess, according to the College Medical Officer,
Dr David Thomas
9,292
The average amount of expenses, in euro,
claimed by each of the five Students’ Union officers last
year
5
The number of candidates who have already declared
their intention of standing for Trinity Students’ Union
presidency so far, possibly because of the above statistic
Trinity disability access is load of rubbish
Diego Cortez
Piles of recklessly placed rubbish are
among many obstacles being placed in the
way of disabled students by Trinity
College authorities, according to a new
campaign by the Students’ Union. The SU
Officer for People with Disabilities, Ross
Wynne has compiled a series of photographs highlighting the daily impediments
facing disabled students in the College.
Mr Wynne has set up a website
to display photographs of disability
unfriendly features of campus. These
range from negligently discarded heaps of
rubbish obscuring wheelchair access to
open thread stairs which pose a threat to
blind students’ safety.
Right: Reckless
An assorted pile of dustbins, wheelie
bins and signs are carelessly strewn
in front of the braille map at the
entrance to the Arts Block rendering
the building extremely difficult for
blind students to navigate
Top left: Filth
A mountain of filthy waste is shamelessly heaped in front of wheelchair
doors outside the Hamilton building
Bottom Left: Outrage
The stage in the Ed Burke theatre, Trinity’s
largest lecture hall, is still a no go zone
for wheelchair users
4
News Feature Editor: Gearóid O’Rourke
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
NEWS FEATURE
Who wants to play Ball?
Gearóid O’Rourke
Birmingham based band Ocean
Colour Scene have been confirmed
as the headline act for this year’s
Trinity Ball. However apart from
their Riverboat Song which was a
major hit in the nineties only the
most die hard of indie music fans
seem to know a whole lot about the
band.
Trinity News looked into
the bands history and found that as
well as being purveyors of glamorours indie rock and roll Ocean
Colour Scene also seem to have a
talent for arguments with labels and
contract walk outs. Not a reasuring
thought for organisers of the Trinity
Ball.
Ocean Colour Scene was
formed from the ashes of several
little-known Birmingham bands in
the late eighties including the
Fanatics, Echo Base and the Boys.
Managed by lead guitarist
Cradock's former policeman father,
Chris, the band recorded their
debut single, "Sway", for the
Birmingham independent label
Phfftt in September 1990. This was
a reasonable success and stimulated interest in the band from more
mainstreamlabels.
Phonogram Records subsequently recruited Ocean Colour
Scene for its Fontana Records stable at a total cost of over £1 million. This was a minor scandal in
the music industry at the time and
many commentators felt it was too
much too soon for the relatively
unknown band.
Former Rolling Stones
producer Jimmy Miller was drafted
in to work on their debut album,
however, Phonogram were unimpressed with the Miller recordings
and his influence on the band.
Reportedly the guys spent more
time trying to emulate the lifestyle
of the Rolling Stones than recording tracks.
Phonogram then installed
Hugo Nicholson (Primal Scream)
Ocean Colour Scene frontman Simon Fowler
in Miller’s stead but he too was
subsequently replaced by Tim
Palmer, earning the band a reputation for being temperemental and
difficult to work with, something
that Ents Officer Niall Hughes may
regret come May. After the release
of the album Simon Fowler, Ocean
Colour Scene’s lead singer conceded “It hasn't really got much personality.”
After this album the band
Thomas to extricate themselves
from massive debts. This would not
be the first label they left under
acrimonious circumstances.
What followed were lean
years for the band until they began
to get support from Brit Pop heavy
weights such as Oasis and Paul
Weller, who described them as
"English 90s R&B". This support
and a tour with the aforementioned
Oasis helped the band win a new
"You've Got It Bad", "The Day We
Caught The Train" and "The
Circle'.
However OCS failed to
capitalize on this success and their
next album was poorly received in
the media with one journalist
describing it as "a grab-bag of
influences with nothing at the centre". Nevertheless, the band's popularity was confirmed when the
album briefly topped the UK charts
on release and the singles
"Hundred Mile High City",
"Travellers Tune" and "Better Day"
all reached the Top 10.
Following albums, while
well received by core fans, have
failed to make a huge commercial
impact on the charts and the band
has parted ways with MCA on less
than friendly terms, this time to set
up their own label.
A worry for Trinity Ball
organisers could be Ocean Colour
Scene’s recent leanings towards
folkier,
more
introspective
tunes,and recent sets which have
become increasinly accoustic
based.
Nevertheless OCS were
renowned in the past for rollicking
live sets and have played successful dates in Dublin’s Olympia.
Whether they can prove a big
enough draw to sell out the Ball is
a different matter especially with
increased ticket prices. Students
increasingly expect big names to
headline and organisers would
have been expected tosecure an act
with at least as much noteriety as
Babyshmables frontman Pete
Doherty.
Rumours always abound
in the lead up to the Ball as to who
is going to play and the names
bandied about this year may have
“The process dragged on for several months
until Ocean Colour Scene walked out on their
contract using lawyer Michael Thomas to extricate themselves from massive debts.”
lost momentum and Phonogram's
excessive investment seemed to
have been a step too far. The band
were unable to convince the label
that their songs were strong enough
for a follow-up set and there were
rumors of label plans to drop the
band from its books.
The process dragged on
for several months until Ocean
Colour Scene walked out on their
contract using lawyer Michael
recording contract with MCA
Records.
Their 1996 single, "The
Riverboat Song", was heavily pro
moted on radio by DJ’s such as
Chris Evans and John Peel, and
became a UK Top 20 chart hit. The
accompanying album, Moseley
Shoals, named after the region of
Birmingham in which the band
formed, followed in April, and
spawned UK Top 10 hits with
Rumoured Ball act Bellx1
been more exciting to students than
a Brit-Pop group who had their
hey-day in the mid nineties. Early
in the year a persistent rumor that
Bloc Party would grace the main
stage at the ball circulated college
while there have been strong hints
that Kildare favourites Bellx1 may
also make an appearance.
The chances of Bellx1
playing seem much more realistic,
owing mainly to the fact that Ents
Officer Niall Hughes is a close personal friend of the band. Having
featured on the cover shots for
Bellx1’s latest album himself
Hughes would not confirm on the
rumours of their playing.
Bellx1 have sold out an
upcoming gig at the RDS a month
in advance and may have the local
pull that Ocean Colour Scene lack.
Furthermore the band are graduates
of Trinity’s Engineering Dept and
would have attendedthe Ball as students.
Another prime candidate
for an appearance is regular David
Kitt who has appeared the last two
years running as well as in the Ed
Burke theatre in the intervening
months.
Bloc Party
Over its life the Trinity Ball has featured some
high profile acts that have secured its position
as one of Ireland’s premier music events.These
acts have included:
Supergrass
The Rapture
The Frames
The Divine Comedy
Asian Dub
David Kitt
Foundation
Republic of Loose
JJ72
The Music
The Undertones
Babyshambles
Death in Vegas
Ian Brown
Alabama 3
The Prodigy
Trinity leads Race Against Waste
Cathal McCann
Spring is on its way and as the seasons turn over, the grounds of
Trinity begin to take on a greener
hue with the budding of trees and
the improvement in the lawns.
Keeping up with this is the annual
Green Week campaign which
occurs this year from Monday 6th
to Friday 10th February.
During this week a series
of events will be taking place, raising many environmental issues
especially that of recycling.
However, outside of Green Week,
all year round there is a constant
drive to increase the amount of
recycling that occurs in College.
The increase in waste
disposal costs combined with legislation means that today homes,
companies and organizations must
recycle portions of their waste for
economic and not only social reasons. Trinity College has been
proactive in this regard and one
cannot but fail to notice the many
special bins and containers around
College for segregated waste.
Since 2000, Trinity has
increased the amount it recycles
from 1% of total waste to well over
33%. Much of this has been driven
by cost concerns with the unit cost
of disposal of recyclable materials
significantly cheaper than that of
mixed waste bound for landfill.
Added to this many more items
may now be easily recycled than in
the past and there are bins all
around College for card, office
paper, newspapers, batteries, cans,
ink cartridges, timber and for clear,
brown and green glass.
Nationally, waste disposal has become a major issue with
communities up in arms about
incinerators, landfill and bin
charges. As a nation we produce an
excessive amount of rubbish, the
amount of which is increasing
annually, and the reality is that
someone must pay for it. The damage caused to the environment by
the phenomenon of modern packaging will effect generations to
come.
However the biggest
problem identified by groups
involved in the drive to recycle is
changing attitudes. It is felt that
more needs to be done to encourage people to purchase products
with less packaging, to stop littering and to actively pursue options
available for recycling.
others on the grounds staff will
carry out quick litter patrols to collect the large amounts of rubbish
thrown away daily. This is despite
the fact that there are many bins
“Laziness is not an excuse. Therefore, if you
are going to recycle, do it right. Wash out your
glass jars; remove labels if you can and if it
says office paper, that means no card or
gloss.”
Every day in Trinity
there are two dedicated staff members of the Grounds department
who are appointed to continually
pick up the litter that is dropped all
over campus. They are the unsung
heroes of why Trinity is noted as
such a clean campus.
In addition to this, many
placed all over the campus and that
all of these are regularly emptied.
During the busiest times of the
summer, some of these will be
emptied two or three times a day.
We will always produce a
certain amount of rubbish per person however it is becoming
increasingly clear that it is up to us
to ensure that we recycle as much
of this as possible.
The organizers of this
Green Week are asking students to
“do your best to ensure you segregate all your recyclable waste and
dispose of it in the proper bins.
There is no shortage of these
around campus and there are maps
and descriptions of them all on the
Green
Pages
website
www.tcd.ie/greenpages.”
They
point out that many are indeed
availing of these bins, but the
biggest problem facing the
Grounds staff is contamination of
what should be segregated waste.
For example if a bin is
marked for newspapers only, by
dropping in glossy magazines,
problems are created for the
Grounds staff and the recycling
company further down the process.
In many cases the waste must be resorted adding to costs and wasting
time.
One of the more unusual
stories of contamination recently
was that of several nappies being
thrown in a skip specifically
marked for recycling timber only,
to the great annoyance of the staff
charged with sorting it. The organizers of Green Week said,
“Laziness is not an excuse.
Therefore, if you are going to recycle, do it right. Wash out your glass
jars; remove labels if you can and if
it says office paper, that means no
card or gloss”.
As the amount Trinity
recycles increases, the College
Recycling
and
Environment
Committee (CREC), founded by
the late Professor Simon Perry, will
be examining even more opportunities to improve facilities and bins.
Trial bins for PET plastic bottles
have started in the Hamilton, but
the biggest problem will remain littering and contamination of the
bins.
After every Green Week,
recycling generally increases, and
littering decreases for a period of
six to eight weeks. However after
this it slowly falls back to normal
levels. This Green Week organisers
hope they can retain the momentum and keep it going all year
round.
According to them their
message for Green Week is simple;
“If you live on campus or work in
any departments, segregate your
waste. If you see someone dropping litter, ask them not to. It is
simply not acceptable any more
and punishable by fines and when
you are fully finished reading this
paper, you know what to do with it
- Put it in the bin that will ensure it
is recycled.”
TCD Green Week 2006
PROGRAMME OF EVENTS
Monday
13h15: Launch of Green Week, with special guest Senator
David Norris. Featuring the new chemical and equipment
exchange initiative, and updates on other recycling and
conservation developments in College.
Exam Hall
Tuesday
17h00: Discussion Forum, "Energy: Conservation and
Sustainability." Speakers will include representatives of
the Energy Industry and Politics. Organised in collaboration with the Historical Society.
Wednesday
3h00: Tree Walk (guided tour of special trees at TCD) led
by Dr Paul Dowding, Botany Department.
Starting from the Campanile.
14h00-16h00: Simon Perry Memorial Lecture, "What did
the environment ever do for me?" given by Ms Eanna Ní
Lamhna (President of An Taisce and regular guest on
“Mooney goes Wild on One”), followed by prize-giving for
Environmental Initiative Competition.
Debating Chamber, Graduate Memorial Building.
Thursday
10h15 (Invitation only): Tea-party and raffle for
Housekeeping Staff to thank them for their crucial role in
the recycling effort in College.
Sponsored by
IPODEC/ONYX.
Dining Hall.
13h00: "Building stones in College: a sparkling façade
revealed ". A guided walk around the stone buildings on
campus led by Dr. Patrick Wyse Jackson (Geology
Department, TCD). Starting outside the Museum Building,
New Square.
Friday
13h00: Bird Walk (guided tour of Trinity birdlife) led by
Mr Aidan Kelly, Physiology Department. Bring binoculars
or field-glasses if possible. Starting from the Campanile.
6
Tuesday January 24, 2006
National News Editor: Anne-Marie Ryan
Trinity News
NATIONAL NEWS
News in Brief
IT Tallaght students
die in fire in France
Two Irish students died tragically
in a fire in Lorient, France earlier
this month. Patricia McDonald
(21) from Co. Cavan and Carol
Nolan (20) from Co. Dublin both
attended
the
Institute
of
Technology Tallaght and were
spending their Erasmus year in the
University of Southern Brittany.
The two girls died of asphyxiation
when a blaze broke out in their
house, caused by a burning cigarette. The fire occurred at around 6
a.m. on 6th January. The two girls
had arrived home following a
night out two hours previously.
The students had returned to
France early from their Christmas
holidays to begin studying for
exams. or not.
Irish students heading en
masse to British universities
Jenny Gallagher
According to figures compiled by
the British-based Higher Education
Statistics Agency, 14,715 Irish
undergraduate and postgraduate
students opted for courses in the
UK for the 2003-2004 academic
year. The popularity for British universities has been boosted by a
huge marketing effort, in which the
Vacancies in USI
after officers resign
The Union of Students Ireland
(USI) recently advertised temporary staff positions within the
organisation following the resignation last month of
Deputy/Campaigns Officer Ruth
Ní Éidhin and Education Officer
Daithí Mac Síthigh. The union is
recruiting a Campaigns Assistant
and a Representation Assistant to
co-ordinate campaigns and assist
USI officers in the preparation of
briefings for various groups
respectively. USI President Tony
McDonnell stressed that the posi-
tions “are temporary and in
response to the situation we find
ourselves in”. Neither of the staff
will be involved in decision-making or representing the USI on
committees. At the time of going
to press the positions had yet to
be filled. The former Trinity students and TCDSU officers withdrew from their positions in
December as a result of their
opposition to the proposed
reforms of the USI constitution
and a poor working relationship
with McDonnell.
Meningitis cases at
debating championships in UCD
An outbreak of meningitis
occurred among the students participating in the world student
debating championships held
recently in UCD. Three debaters
contracted viral meningitis while
taking part in the competition.
One student was taken to hospital, while two others were seen
by a GP. There was no disruption
to the event itself as a result of
the outbreak. Over 1,000 students
participated in the event held
over the Christmas holidays in
the Belfield campus, with Hart
College of the University of
Toronto eventually emerging victorious. UCC was the most successful Irish university, reaching
the final 32 teams in the competition. Two Irish students were also
finalists, representing universities
from the USA and the UK.
Graduates can study
medicine next autumn
The Minister for Education and
Science Mary Hanafin is set to
introduce graduate level entry into
medicine shortly and plans to
more than double the number of
medical places available by 2010.
Cabinet approval of the plan will
see 70 new places become available by next autumn, with a further 240 places being created over
the next two or three years. There
are currently only 305 places
available in the five third level
institutes which offer medicine
courses.
The plan follows an
announcement by UCD last
August to introduce a graduate
entry system to medicine whereby
graduates of any discipline undergo an interview and aptitude test
to determine their suitability for
the course. The university is due
to begin a graduate medicine programme in September 2006,
where postgraduate students will
complete a four year course that
will lead to the same degree as
students entering through the traditional leaving certificate undergraduate route.
The high points
required by Leaving Certificate
students in order to study medicine are not expected to change
following an increase in the number of places available however.
This is because of the enormous
demand for medicine places
which far outstrips supply. This
year’s entrants to medicine at
TCD required a points score of
590 out of a maximum possible
score of 600 points.
IADT students vote
to stay with USI
Students at the Dún Laoghaire
Institute of Art, Design and
Technology (IADT) voted recently to remain affiliated to the USI.
The narrow result showed 58%
voting in favour of remaining
with the national student body,
while 42% voted against. The
total number of votes cast was
281. Message board comments
suggest students were illinformed on the issues they were
voting for, with one claiming that
students were coerced into voting
yes as a result of false claims that
student would have to pay full
fees if they disaffiliated. A move
towards disaffiliation comes after
the perceived crisis in the USI
following controversy over
changes to the constitution and
the resignation of the Deputy
President and Education Officer
of the organisation. Disaffiliation
is strongly supported by Jane
Horgan-Jones, the Education
Officer of the Students’ Union in
UCD.
RAG week begins
around the country
Students around the country are
eagerly anticipating the beginning
of the RAG week season. The
first rag week of 2006 is taking
place in Cork this week, with
more following throughout
February. There has been some
confusion in recent weeks over
when rag weeks are taking place.
In the University of Limerick, for
instance RAG week has been
moved to an earlier week in the
second semester in order to avoid
clashing with exams and assignment deadlines. In DIT the introduction of semesterisation has
also led to confusion regarding
when RAG week will take place.
The RAG week in DCU will
commence in the week beginning
13th February and its organisers
are promising three bar extensions and a RAG trip. NUI
Galway will have one of the last
RAG weeks beginning on
Monday 26th February.
Compiled by Anne-Marie Ryan
Irish students are attracted by the lure of British universities
such as Oxford
institutions showcase their courses
to potential candidates at the
Higher Options exhibition in the
RDS each year.
With the obvious obstacle of university fees and general
expense of study in the UK, one
must ask why Irish students remain
undeterred and continue to migrate
en masse. It appears that the enormous choice of courses is one of
the main advantages of studying in
the UK. This extensive range of
courses means that there are areas
of study available that do not even
exist in Irish universities. Study in
the UK continues to be a
favourable option to those trying
for more competitive courses such
as veterinary, pharmacy etc. The
UCAS selection system is viewed
by most as being fairer in that it
takes a more complete picture of
the candidate into account.
Further statistics based
on research conducted by the
Ulster Unionist Party (UUP) policy
unit indicate that over 4000 firstyear students leave Northern
Ireland every year to attend university with only one third returning
after graduation. This migration
rate is startling when compared
with England and Scotland. While
only 5% of English students leave
England and 6% of Scottish students leave Scotland to study, a
staggering 32% leave Northern
Ireland to pursue a higher education.
Dr Crowe, the UUP’s
policy and research officer stressed
the “economic significance” of
this. He criticised the Department
of Education and Learning for taking “a very laissez-faire attitude to
student migration”. The UUP are
keen to halt this “brain drain” of
talent out of the North as it carries
a serious negative socio-economic
impact. They have responded by
proposing a number of measures in
order to counteract this trend,
including creating more university
places and targeting of major businesses to create jobs for quality
graduates.
The
president
of
University College Dublin, Hugh
Brady, warned that this “brain
drain” trend will continue unless
Ireland improves its resources in
infrastructure and funding.
Rip-off Rail: huge
differences in
Iarnród Éireann
student discounts
Anne-Marie Ryan
An investigation by Trinity News
into discount fares offered by the
national transport body CIE to student passengers has shown major
differences between the savings
offered for different destinations.
For students traveling on Iarnród
Éireann services, discounts offered
on adult return fares from Dublin to
major towns and cities around the
country can range from as low as
16% to as high as 52%. Significant
differences also occur regarding
discounts offered by Bus Éireann,
ranging between 18% and 29% on
fares to major cities.
The investigation into
discrepancies between discount
fares comes following an average
increase of 3.8% in fares on services offered by Dublin Bus, DART,
Luas, Bus Éireann and Iarnród
Éireann which came into effect in
early January.
An examination of 18
fares from the major stations in
Dublin to destinations around the
country show an average saving of
34% offered to students, although
savings vary considerably. Clear
discrepancies occur where there are
significant differences in the discount offered on standard return
fares to student passengers
The standard return fare
from Dublin to Athlone, for
instance costs €34.50 with a discounted ticket costing €16.50, representing a saving of 50%. A standard return fare to Sligo is similarly priced, at €35. But the discount-
Table illustrating the huge variance in discounts offered to students by Iarnród Éireann
Adult Student
Discount
return return
Cork
€59.00
€38.50
35%
Galway
€43.50
€25.50
42%
Westport
€43.50
€29.50
32%
Athlone
€34.50
€16.50
52%
Sligo
€35.00
€26.50
24%
Rosslare
€24.50
€20.50
16%
Wexford
€24.50
€19.50
20%
Belfast
€48.00
€35.00
27%
Dundalk
€24.50
€14.50
53%
Ennis
€48.50
€30.50
37%
ed fare is far less generous than that
offered to Athlone students however, with Sligo students saving only
24% on an almost identical standard fare.
Iarnród Éireann charge
full fare paying passengers €24.50
to travel to either Rosslare,
Wexford or Dundalk, yet the discount offered to students on each
destination is 16%, 20% and 53%
respectively. Standard fares to
Belfast and Ennis are also similarly
priced, yet students traveling to the
south-west save 37% compared
with the 27% saved by their northern-bound counterparts. Galway
and Westport-bound passengers
both pay €43.50 for their tickets,
yet in spite of traveling in the same
direction Galway students receive a
discount of 42% as opposed to the
32% discount received by their
Connacht counterparts.
The size of the discount
does not appear to bear any relation
to how high the standard fare is.
The most expensive adult return
tickets are to Cork, Killarney and
Tralee and each of these destinations offer the average discount
rate of 34%. Discounts appear to be
highest on the cheaper destinations,
however there are too many exceptions to this claim to view it as a
general rule.
Trinity News contacted
Iarnród Éireann requesting an
explanation for the differences in
discounts offered. At the time of
going to print however no reply
was forthcoming.
Although
differences
between discounts offered were not
as obvious as those offered by
Iarnród Éireann, there are nonetheless some major discrepancies
Students faced yet another hike in bus fares this month. Photo:
Brenda Meaney
between fares offered to students
traveling on Bus Éireann services.
Students traveling to Galway
receive a paltry discount of 3%,
while students heading to
Waterford benefit from 26% off the
adult return fare.
Even though Cork is one
of the most expensive rail destinations for students, it is actually one
of the cheapest bus destinations.
The dramatic decrease in fares to
Cork may owe a great deal to
increased competition on that line,
following the introduction of a
cheaper Aircoach service between
Cork and Dublin.
While Iarnród Éireann
offer a discounted fare to Belfastbound students, Bus Éireann do not
offer any fare reductions to students traveling to any destination in
Northern Ireland.
Steady increases in transport costs continue to effect students commuting within the Dublin
area. While the average bus fare
has increased by only 5c, students
are feeling the cumulative effect of
steady price increases which have
occurred over the past number of
years. One final year physiotherapy
student pointed out that throughout
her four years in college, her bus
fare has increased every year, rising from €1.10 in 2002 to €1.35 in
2006.
Luas fares have also
increased since early Janauary,
which will affect the thousands of
Trinity students living in Trinity
Hall who commute to College from
the Milltown station. Most single
journey Luas tickets increased by
10c, while a 30 day Luas pass covering two zones increased by €1.
Students using
the
DART are also affected by the 4%
increase in fares.
The actual fare increase
sanctioned by Minster for
Transport Martin Cullen was only
half the increase requested by CIE,
who sought a price hike of 7.5%. In
order to avail of student discount
rates on Luas, DART and Iarnród
Éireann services students must purchase a Student Travel Card, at a
cost of €12. For students wishing
to avail of discounts on Bus Éireann services, student identification
will suffice.
Huge investment in third
level long overdue
Catherine Shanahan
The
government
recently
announced an investment package
of €1.2bn for higher education in
Ireland, including €900m for capital and infrastructure and €300m
allocated to a Strategic Innovation
Fund.
Investment in capital and
infrastructure will be largely directed towards science and technology,
while the Strategic Innovation Fun
has been set up to encourage universities to engage in reform in
order to increase the level of funding made available to them.
Higher
education
appears to have made it onto the
government agenda, with the
Taoiseach Bertie Ahern describing
as a “major national priority” the
improvement of the performance of
Irish universities and institutes of
technology and the establishment
of a ‘fourth-level’ sector for postgraduate research that will compete
against the highest international
standards.
‘Fourth
level’
has
become a buzz word in education
circles in recent times. It refers to
the creation of a dedicated sector
for postgraduate education, particularly at PhD level. It is thought
that colleges will co-operate with
each other in administrating that
sector.
The investment package
for fourth level education was par-
ticularly well-received by the
umbrella
body
the
Irish
Universities Association (IUA),
who had outlined their plans for the
development of such a sector in a
pre-Budget submission.
The funding allocation
was also cautiously welcomed by
the Union of Students Ireland
(USI), although they did express
concern that capital projects would
be prioritized on the basis of politically driven agenda rather than real
need.
The Strategic Innovation
Fund is likely to please universities
currently engaging in restructuring
programmes, such as Trinity, UCD
and UCC. UCD President Dr Hugh
Brady, whose moves towards
semesterisation have angered many
in the Belfield campus, has enthusiastically welcomed the fund.
According to Minister
for Education Mary Hanafin the
fund will encourage colleges to
work more closely together and
pursue internal programmes of
reorganisation.
For the USI however, the
Strategic Innovation Fund remains
controversial. Union President
Tony O’Donnell said that the fund
may be used as a ‘crude implement’ to force the third level sector
to engage with the commercial
agenda.
“Restructuring is a buzzword currently in vogue, but the
fund should be used to develop the
education sector based on access
for all and a quality education, not
to force the universities to restructure according to a profit driven
agenda”, he said.
An intrinsic part of the
proposed fourth level system is collaboration between higher education institutes across the country. In
his budget speech, Minister for
Finance Brian Cowen pointed out
that it was not sensible for such a
small country to have all its institutes competing against each other
in various disciplines and that third
level institutes should merge some
of their courses in order to draw on
collective strengths.
International Review Editor: Doaa Baker
Trinity News
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
7
INTERNATIONAL REVIEW
Democracy in Cell Block Hebron
Hugh Harkin
A Palestinian friend emailed me
last week. He didn’t mention
Sharon, didn’t talk about the
upcoming elections. Instead, he
told me about the night before,
when the windows of his family’s
home had been smashed in, and his
neighbour’s house set on fire. Both
acts were done by his other neighbours: Israeli settlers.
My friend, Firas, lives on
what must be one of the most
frightening streets in the world –
Shuhada Street in the city centre, or
‘Old City’, of Hebron, in the south-
ern West Bank. His house, a
stone’s throw from the resting
place of Abraham, is probably
worth millions, but very few people
would want to live there. Most of
his neighbours are Israeli settlers,
who in the late 1960s, following
Israel’s conquest of the West Bank
and Gaza, took over a derelict
building smack bang in the middle
of this city of 120,000 Palestinians.
Since then their colony
has progressively expanded outwards, as the Hebron settlers have
incrementally pushed out their
Palestinian neighbours, by such
violence and intimidation as Firas’
family continues to suffer.
Palestinians in the Old City – now
almost entirely under Israeli control – are completely powerless to
stop them. I saw this for myself a
year and a half ago. Teenage settlers, boys and girls, walk the
streets with M16s (legally!) slung
over their shoulders. The market
area, once the thriving centre of
Hebron’s cultural and economic
life, has been all but shut down by
the Israeli army.
Walking through the Old
City you see abandoned Palestinian
homes and shops, which, with a
spine-chilling ignorance of history,
are daubed by the settlers with
Stars of David to signify Jewish
ownership. Many of the shops
have been broken into, wrecked
and pillaged. One Palestinian
home had its front door welded
shut by the army. The family,
determined to stay put, now come
and go via their back window. At
one particular stretch of the Old
City, along its narrow medieval
streets, you find a wire mesh above
your head, full of rubbish. Settlers
have taken over the upper floors
here, and before the Palestinians
put up the netting, the rubbish used
to be simply thrown down onto the
Palestinian street.
The settlers now number
over 400, and are protected by over
2000 Israeli soldiers. With the
army come the checkpoints, roadblocks, curfews, patrols and dayand-night raids. The constant
apprehension. The unwillingness
to even chance leaving home.
The harassment is daily
in Hebron’s Old City for the
Palestinians who stubbornly
remain. When Firas told me about
his latest troubles, it came five
paragraphs in to the email. Five
paragraphs in! It was as if such
attacks were not really news, hardly stuff to be making a song and
dance about. This was simply life,
part of the details of one’s day, to
be commented on just as I might
tell him of a trip I took to the cinema.
These days, though, the
Hebron settlers’ antics are – on the
internet at least – news. This is
because eight settler families who
have been squatting in the Old City
have been served with an Israeli
court eviction order. As Firas succinctly put it: “The settlers refuse
this order and express this refusal
by attacking Palestinian houses and
shops.” What is unusual about this
evacuation, however, is that we are
hearing so little about it in our own
media; that it is not, as one might
expect, being heralded as another
magnanimous Israeli “gesture of
One Year On: Goal’s
Work Post-Tsunami
GOAL’s €10 million project to
build 63 schools along Sri Lanka’s
Ampara coastline kicked off this
month, with a New Years Eve 2006
completion deadline.
One year after the tsunami, GOAL is focussing its energy
on a programme that will ensure
30,000 children can continue with
their education. In a statement,
GOAL’s CEO, John O’Shea said:
“This is a massively important initiative as it gives these children an
education, and means they now
have hope for the future.”
GOAL’s innovative cashfor-work schemes played a useful
role in enabling people, including
women, who lost their livelihoods,
to find temporary employment.
Over the past year, the agency has
provided over €45,000 cash for
work workers through employment
in constructing shelters and
rebuilding infrastructure.
“The average days work
for these local people included
such activities as clearing houses,
drainage and lagoon cleaning, as
well as waste removal.”
“The speedy construction of some 1,400 GOAL shelters
was in no small part due to the
enthusiasm of our cash-for-work
initiative, which also saw the repair
of secondary roads, paddy fields
and irrigation canals - testament to
the success of the scheme.”
The tsunami contaminated most of the wells it reached with
salt water and debris. To ensure
local people had access to clean
and safe drinking water, GOAL
prioritised cleaning 1740 water
wells, installing and maintaining
thousands of water tanks and water
connections, as well as training the
local water board.
To help affected families
rebuild their lives, GOAL assisted
with cement block-making, and
distributing coconut tree seeds for
planting, as well as repairing thousands of canoes and boats.
“Many thousands of survivors of the tsunami have been
able to redevelop their fishing
livelihoods, and their lives are
slowly returning to normality once
again after the most traumatic year
of their lives.”
The agency’s emergency
operations included clearing water
sources, building temporary shelters for 1,400 families, distributing
mosquito nets and family hygiene
kits, school uniforms and fishing
nets, as well as repairing hundreds
of fishing boats. This intense programme was followed by relief
activities which included the distribution of food and essential non
food items to those most affected
by this disaster, providing assistance to approximately 180,000
tsunami victims in the three districts of Sri Lanka – Ampara on the
east coast, and Hambantota and
Matara on the south coast.
GOAL believes in keeping its cost base as low as possible,
and is proud to have kept administration costs at an average of 5%
over a 28 year period.
As a result of the extensive damage to classrooms, classes are held outside
peace”.
But on closer inspection,
this is not such a surprise, since it is
only a partial evacuation, and the
army have confirmed that Hebron
is to remain as stifled as before.
And of charade while they remain
locked in their cells, which thanks
to the settlements and the wall, are
getting smaller by the day. The
most incredible part of it all is that
this is the negotiating position from
which the Palestinian election winners will be expected, without
international intervention, to parley
for justice and for their own state.
8
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Features Editor: LizJohnson
Trinity News
FEATURES
Time Is Running Out for Oil Lovers
Liz Johnson tells us all why we should stop worrying about oil prices and start embracing an
altogether greener way of thinking
Envy- The Green Eyed Monster
Horoscopes - Brought to you by
our resident Trinity psychics
Capricorn: 22nd December 20th January
Sometimes newspapers like to talk
about
red
cauliflowers.
Sometimes they like to question
the validity of caps. I don’t say
this to make you feel jealous of
those lucky journalists who have
such wonderful lives, but just so
you’re aware in case you stumble
across the articles in between the
sudoku section and the Celebrity
Big Brother updates. It’s a dangerous and cruel world out there. Just
asked the Herald AM people.
Cancer: 23rd June - 23rd July
Pluto and Uranus are competing in
order to secure the licence for the
first tequilla bar in space. You can
take this up in four different ways.
1) It’s competition time. You’ve
always been a big loser and now’s
your chance to prove this true
once again. 2) It’s competition
time. If you can’t win then you
should just leave the planet. 3) Go
drink tequilla shots. 4) If you feel
envious of Uranus at any stage
during the next two weeks, drink
more tequilla shots.
Aquarius: 21st January - 19th
February
Pianos make great hiding places.
This is where all your odd socks
have been laying low. Please don’t
rat them out - they’re bound to fail
the polygraph. Their only hope is
to move to Alaska. Pinot noir
might taste better in the dark but
you’ll spill it on left big toe and
never recover. You have been
warned. Try using a blanket to
cover that big spot on your nose.
All the celebrities are doing it.
Perhaps not in public, but you’ll
be a trendsetter. Only chance
you’ll get.
Leo: 24th July - 23rd August
As the supreme of all star signs,
envy is a little feeling that has no
impact on your mentality. The
only time it impacts on your little
handbag driven lives is the vibes
those plebs give off. Not that you
resent them, the poor little
blighters, looking upon your star
with hopeful eyes. As perfect, you
are never envious of anybody. It
might give you wrinkles. Anyway,
green is soooo not your colour.
Pisces: 20th February - 20th
March
You can’t teach an old fish new
tricks, but you can find fingers on
it if you believe old men with
beards. Far better to find girls with
long hair and convince them of the
virtues of a career in the construction industry. Try to market hard
hats that will accommodate their
goldilocks tendencies. Remember,
miniskirts might make sense on
the OC, but the sun shines there.
The arts block hasn’t seen sun
since 1963, and even then we suspect it was a drug-induced hallucination.
Aries: 21st March - 20th April
There is a place beneath the stairs
where certain types of lampshades
go to be at one with their inner
choir. In the modern world of confusion, this ability to be in touch
with their inner programmes is to
be celebrated, not envied. These
lampshades are, after all, only one
step up from muffins and thus are
entitled to all statutory rights and
other consumer rights etc etc. May
you all find you inner chimney
and peace. Lets not be jealous
people, lets love and (in the words
of Pete Burns) screw (I mean the
nail variety).
Taurus: 21st April - 21st May
Cookies make the world go round.
Even if it is spherical. But don’t be
fooled by the neon lights.
Sellotape might make for some
short-term repairs but ultimately
you will have to face the truth
about Elmo. Don’t be ashamed.
Many people prefer muppets to
real people. Understandable, really. But you should at least try to
talk to creatures with a circulatory
system. Try to avoid oranges.
Gemini: 22nd May - 22nd June
Since there’s two of you, enjoy
twice the jealously. Celebrate by
convincing gullible children in
your neighbourhood that santa is
stuck in your chimney and will
only be freed if pelted with nail
files. Burn the travel section of the
Sunday Times to exorcise all
demons lurking under the sink but
preserve the Christmas cards at all
costs. They will serve you well in
the intergalactic wars.
Virgo: 24th August - 23rd
September
Red wine will not solve all your
ills. But It will distract you from
them. Watch out for purple teeth
and flipflops on people on rainy
January days. Marble is your
lucky stone but jaffa cakes will
always be luckier. Don’t wait for
your sign to go into retrograde,
start walking backwards yourself
and while you’re at it, relinquish
all New Year’s resolutions. Jog
backwards if it’ll make you feel
better, but accept the fact that
you’ll sprain your ankle.
Libra: 24th September- 23rd
October
Straws are a universal experience.
You will never experience it
unless you adopt a Jodi Marsh
style barnett. Extensions optional.
Try wearing headphones to complete the ensemble. Drop
‘pimpinella’ into at least 3 sentences tomorrow and all your
wishes will come through. Except
the one about the ladder and the
blackcurrant jelly. Let’s face it,
that’ll never happen. Just accept.
And paint your nails.
Scorpio: 24th October - 22nd
November
Wise old Japanese men say:
“Don’t let the tree tell you it’s a
mackintosh”. In the annals of the
psychic secret society (listed
under Doyles in the Golden Pages.
Cunning) we have found the translation of this saying to be
“Jealousy is a healthy part of life
until you let it take over your
lasagne”. Go in peace and zen to
live healthily with all forms of
biodegradable food stuffs.
Sagittarius: 23rd November 21st December
Did you ever feel just a little bit
envious of the gummy bears and
their cute little gummyness.
Apparently a whole generation of
boys went through the same experience, so believe us when we
quote Michael Jackson “you are
not alone”. Now that you’re older,
we wanted to open up a few more
extra curricular jealousy targets.
So, repeat after us; I must strive to
be envious of: yellow M&M
peanuts, squirrels with tails measuring 6 inches and anybody with the
fortune to have the middle name
Geraldo. Consider it your daily
morning mantra. Really, there’s no
need to thank us.
Much as we all grumble about doing
essays and projects around the end of
term, occasionally (very occasionally)
one comes along which really opens
your eyes to an issue you had previously given relatively little thought to. This
revelation occurred to me as I sat, pen
poised, at my kitchen table in Week 9 of
last term. It turns out that renewable
energy sources are not just a course
topic but also one of today’s biggest
environmental issues.
Our society is more or less
addicted to oil. Every day, a staggering
84 million barrels of oil are used worldwide. That’s about 30 billion per year. If
we continue to guzzle it as we have
been doing, our dependency looks set to
increase while our supplies diminish
even further. Previously, we have been
able to rely upon discoveries of more
oil fields, but in reality we have been
using more oil than we have been finding for over two decades. Oil discoveries are running out, and those that are
discovered are of inferior quality. The
most promising discovery of recent
times, the Kashagan field in the Caspian
Sea, has a potential 15 billion barrels
worth of oil to be used. This may sound
a lot, but would actually only sustain
the world for around half a year.
According to the Association of the
Study of Peak Oil and Gas, we consume
around 30 million barrels of oil for
every 5 that are found. This situation
surely cannot go on.
As supply is decreasing and
demand shows little sign of diminishing, it naturally follows that prices will
increase. On Tuesday January 17th the
price of a barrel of oil shot up two dollars to $66 per barrel. This price hike
was attributed to security fears in Iran
and Nigeria, and draws our attention to
the problematic fact that most of our
remaining oil resources lie in the
Middle East area. Coincidentally, this is
one of the most politically unstable
regions in the world. This combination
does not make for a great deal of confidence in the future oil markets. Donald
Rumsfeld in 2002 told the world that
the war in Iraq ‘had nothing to do with
oil.’ Did you believe him? I certainly
didn’t - I doubt he even believed himself. Call me a cynic, but was it a mere
twist of fate that the oil fields of Kirkuk
were among the first areas to be secured
by coalition forces, and that the
Ministry of Petroleum was the only
Iraqi government building that wasn’t
attacked? It is a hazardous thing to be
dependant on the Middle East for such
an important commodity.
Oil at $60 a barrel actually
isn’t that expensive. It’s just that in our
heads we feel it should be around $20.
A $60 barrel of oil works out at 18c a
pint. That’s certainly a lot cheaper than
“$60 oil works out at
18c a pint. That’s a
lot cheaper than a
pint of anything else
in Dublin!”
a pint of anything else in Dublin!
Admittedly though, the price has rocketed in recent years. Even the US
Energy Department have drastically
changed their story of late. Last year
they predicted that in 2025 a barrel of
oil would cost $34.35, and now they are
officially forecasting $112 oil in 2030.
So it would seem that we had better get
used to expensive oil, or get used to the
idea of alternative energy sources.
A lot of people have recently been jumping on the renewable energy bandwagon, but I get the feeling that
as far as bandwagons go, this may actually be a pretty good one. The combination of high oil prices, environmental
concerns, improved technologies and a
desire for greater energy security has
emerged to create an increasingly good
investment environment for alternative
energy. Corporations such as General
Electric (GE), BP, now marketing itself
as ‘Beyond Petroleum’, and even Shell
The Science block fight back with...
Diary of a
Science Girl
We at Trinity News are all about equal opportunities. So when this plucky Science student
decided to speak out against BESS and their kin,
we thought hey! Why not!We always thought
that science students were pretty illiterate, but
here, proving us wrong, is the Science Girl!
I didn’t check my dictionary for
this column but I did check my
thesaurus. As a science student I
need help articulating so that this
column is not sparse, bare, meagre
or scanty.
We are a different breed
(and from the BESS girl’s diary, a
different species I hope). We do
not experience the depths of shallowness as our peroxided, orangefaced kin in the arts block.
We prefer to not to totter
about on the cobblestones in
match-stick heels or wake up an
hour early to draw on our faces.
I’ll admit that with all our scientific erudition, we have yet to discover the insulatory properties of
fake tan. But we are not envious of
you in the slightest.
What is there to envy?
Your bomb-shelter of a building?
Wait, we have that too. Your free
time to run societies? We’d be
intimidated by the amount of people we don’t know. The many
ridiculously themed balls you
have? It’s less effort to get drunk
in a pub and the outcomes just the
same. Your essay writing skills? A
lab report is more straight forward
and the results can be fixed. Your
ability to pull jocks? There are
twenty three synonyms for prostitute.
In fact, there is a lot
about us science students you
have to envy. It is actually possible for us to get over 75%. And we
very often do. Our research actually makes money for the college,
so we are not so much in danger of
leaving with a degree from a nonexistent department. We have
benches with separate seats suitable for both right- and left-handers. We have a far higher toilet to
student ratio. We get jobs related
to our degrees that we can make a
lot of money from. We comprehend the futility of student politics.
What is most envious
about the science way of life is our
close knit community. Our class
sizes rarely extend to three digits.
As such we can actually participate in lectures. The lecturers even
get to know us and some host parties in their houses. Here, I have
hit upon a gem.
Only in the science
block can you find such relics.
Old-school lecturers that wear
corduroy pants and tweed jackets
with leather elbow patches. They
wear the same three outfits that
their wives lay out for them every
morning. They use blackboards
and acetates. They have their computer sitting in a box on the floor
of their office. They are so
untouched by the outside world
that they are completely preserved
fossils. They are so shaped by
their individual research interest
that they resemble the cast of
Father Ted. You can’t find them
anywhere else.
I’d pity BESS girls, but
I’m too busy laughing at them.
all have alternative energy departments.
Although many groups lost money by
investing in alternative energy after the
1970s oil crises, alternative energy
companies are now enjoying an abundance of investment activity, including
movement from groups who were previously uninterested.
I think that it is time for us
to sit up and take notice. Oil is clearly
not going to last forever and there are
plenty of alternative options out there
ready to be developed further if only
society were willing to give them its
support.
Solar power, for instance,
has become a great deal more commercial, with various policies now making
it more viable and less unstable in terms
of pricing. One may not equate Ireland
with glorious sunshine, but apparently
it can even work here! (And if it can
work here, then surely it could work
anywhere!)
Wind power is perhaps one
of the most visible sources of alternative energy. Generally constructed on
high ground, these massive turbines can
be seen around various parts of Irish
landscape. Since the 1970s their size
and efficiency has increased eight-fold.
Offshore, they are even more effective
as they can be moved to wherever the
wind is, and this type of wind power is
expected to take off (no pun intended)
dramatically in the North Sea in the
coming years. In fact, research by Shell
has shown that if the most effective
wind turbines are large enough and in
suitable locations, they could provide
electricity at a wholesale price (around
10c per kWh) comparable with nonrenewable energy sources such as oil.
While this is all very well
for business, I feel that the alternative
energy resource that could make the
most difference to the individual is biofuel. Biofuels such as biodiesel are
based on ingredients like rapeseed oil,
or ethanol-based petrol. Prices for biofuels are coming down as technology
and production increases, and cars are
Windmills- the power of the future?
now being manufactured to be able to
cope with alternative fuels. In a perfect
world there would be an alternative to
private transport, but there isn’t.
Environmentally conscious as I am, I
would still gladly give up my wet wait
at the bus stop every morning for the
comfort of a private car. As such, a
compromise must be reached, and biofuels may be it. They cut carbon emissions by up to 90%, have no great
downside and are truly sustainable.
At present, the biofuels sector, along with other alternative energy
sources that I mentioned above, is too
small and infantile to be a real threat to
the conventional oil giants, but with the
right combination of government backing, promotion and price reductions,
along with continuing price increases in
conventional oil, alternative energy
may well present a future option. Oil
prices are high and look set to stay that
way, with supplies dwindling as the
world refuses to wean itself off its
addiction. But people’s attitudes are
slowly beginning to change. I think that
we need to stop burying our heads in
the deserts of Saudi Arabia in the hope
of finding some kind of phantom oil
reservoir. Take a deep breath, accept
that oil is not forever, and head in the
direction of alternative energy.
Matt meets the Monaguesque Monarch
Trinity’s own Matteo Matubara writes about his friendship with Albert, the Prince of
Monaco. Our favourite eccentric around campus is known to have correspondance with various members of Royalty and Trinity News is always interested to hear of any new developments.
Matteo writes;
“With pleasure I received a very
beautiful Christmas card from my
royal friend, Prince Albert of
Monaco in reply to my card of congratulations on his enthronement in
the Principality on 19 November
2005.
The cover of his
Christmas card illustrates an
enlightened tree at court. Inside the
card his best wishes are expressed
in golden letters in trilingual –
French, Italian and English, and his
personal signature in gold.
I would like to explain
how I have come into contact with
my Monagesque royal friend. His
late mother Princess Grace, alias
former Hollywood star Grace
Kelly, received my letter as she
boosted Monaco. As she learned of
my interest in her son Prince
Albert, then an adolescent, she sent
me a photograph of her with him,
provided with their autographs.
This autographed photograph
attracted people.
The era of Princess
Grace in Monaco ended with her
tragic death in a car crash on 13
September 1982.
When Prince Albert
came to Dublin as the Honorary
President of Ireland’s Red Cross in
succession to Princess Grace, I
went to meet him at the Berkeley
Court hotel on his invitation. I was
received by him in his private elegant room on the top floor, where I
had the honour to share breakfast
with him.
Although his adjutant
was present he talked with me in
writing in bilingual. I was deeply
touched when he told me that his
mother spoke of me and showed
him my correspondences.
Since then he has sent
me a Christmas card every year and
various illustrations per annum.
When Prince Albert II
became the sovereign of the principality, he surrounded himself with
a new generation of councillors
and experts in finance and management. I wish him well in bettering
the principality of Monaco.”
A Royal Correspondant
Ranting - its a way of life
Kathryn Segesser, Anna Kavanagh and Noirin Hurley
bemoan the cobbles of Front Square
In a country renowned for its rain,
paving the main pedestrian area of
college with material which
morphs into a death trap every time
it rains was not perhaps the brightest idea the collective minds of college ever had.
Their aesthetic qualities
are not to be sniffed at, but when
they come at the price of broken
limbs, necks and shoes (the last
especially important) we have to
question their worth.
The cobble question first
arose in the treacherous period of
Freshers’ Week when unsuspecting
ankles were sacrificed to the
uneven surface of front square. Not
to mention numerous suitcases
who, whilst making noises to trouble even the deafest of grannies,
simultaneously found their bottoms
scuffed, chipped and, ultimately,
waylaid in the space of 10 minutes.
We have heard tales
whispered of suitcase wheels that
literally cracked under the pressure. Suddenly the dangers of
Front Square were multiplied
exponentially. Not only did students have to cope with the greaselike cobbles, they were now catching their feet in escaped underwear,
wandering scarves and lost sports
equipment.
Yet there exists a breed
of girl in Trinity who somehow
remains impervious to the many
pitfalls of Front Square. While
some of us (current authors very
much included) can barely stagger
across to the Buttery in the flattest
of flat shoes without taking a spec-
“The long and short of
it is that there is no
beauty without pain
and, as there is also no
Dublin without rain, we
are destined to suffer on
forever more”
tacular nose dive, a significant proportion of the Trinity girls retain
the ability to strut like Dublin’s
Next Top Model across the
square…..in heels!
What pact can they have
signed with the Devil? How many
first borns can you sacrifice? Why
are they not all on crutches?! There
can be nothing more humiliating
than raising your face from the
cobbles where it has just landed
with a resounding thud only to
have a stiletto clad foot step daintily over you and continue on its way
without breaking stride. There is no
justice in the world!!!
Of course the stilettos
would be bearable were it not for
the overwhelming propensity of
Trinity staffers parking cars and
other moving vehicles in Front
Square itself. Thus not only do you
have to deal with crossing the Front
Square but you can’t even take the
direct route. Your chances of total
annihilation are therefore considerably increased.
Now might also be the
time to point out the numerous
tourists who are also able to negotiate the death trap. How is it that
Americans and other unspecified
nationales can not only cross the
square in destined-to-cause-you-toslip flip flops, but can do so whilst
moving backwards. We think it’s
some sort of secret conspiracy to
make us feel even more inadequate. Can’t be sure, but it sounds
great and helps us when lying flat
out in the Square.
The long and short of it
is that there is no beauty without
pain and, as there is also no Dublin
without rain, we are destined to
suffer on forever more. Think of us
when you’re stepping over us. Its
not easy being this undignified.
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Features Editor: Liz Johnson
9
Trinity News
FEATURES
A Book Worm Turns - The Embarrassment of Reading Chick-Lit
Anna Kavanagh realises that there is no point in reading
books just for the sake of saying you have read them
Read any good books lately? It’s a
truly horrible question to ask most
people, but especially evil if you
happen to be speaking to an
English student. You quickly run
through the range of suitable
answers you’ve prepared in
advance (when, admittedly, you
could have been actually reading
books, but let’s be realistic): ‘I’m in
the middle of a Rushdie retrospective… still can’t decide between
Shame and The Satanic Verses.’ Or,
‘Of course! I’m working my way
through the leading lights of magic
realism and hope to go onto national literatures of developing nations
next month’. Or the ultimate,
‘Actually, I’m rereading Ulysses.’
Rereading, you’ll notice, because
let’s face it, who hasn’t read
Ulysses at least once already.
Regardless of who asked
you the question, be it your tutor,
flatmate or just the random crazy
bloke on the Dart, something compels you give what seems like an
appropriate response. Also known
as lying. People who couldn’t possibly know what you’re studying,
or even that you’re studying anything, people who were just
attempting to make idle conversation without resorting to the weather, become the unwilling recipients
of a desperate monologue in which
you name every Victorian writer
you can remember from the two
lectures you went to.
Something happens to even the
sanest Leaving Cert student when
he or she fills out the CAO and puts
down English as one of the choices.
Somehow this constitutes a life
choice, a statement of intent: I am a
serious bibliophile and as such will
only read books worthy of my staggering intellect. I will not assail my
highly refined senses with anything
that could be classed as popular fiction. I will certainly not read for
such frivolous purposes as “entertainment”.
Every trip into Hodges Figgis
becomes a horrible mental battle.
In the red corner, bespectacled
angels, often sporting goatees and
tweed jackets, desperately try to
push you over to the literary fiction
classics section. ‘Proust!’ they
scream, ‘You’d really like him!’
The blue corner is occupied by
angels who look considerably more
like you do, especially the version
of you that staggers in on a
Thursday morning having spent
most of Wednesday night drinking
something that you remember was
green, and after which you don’t
remember very much at all.
They’re considerably quieter than
the red angels (by now engaged in
a heated debate over the contribution Kafka made to international
literature) but eventually one of
them musters up enough energy to
point languidly at the ‘three-fortwo’ offer on bestsellers and, with a
consoling smile, says simply ‘You
know what to do’.
Still
you
resist.
Gathering every ounce of your
resolve you march past the new
Terry Pratchett book (and finally in
paperback – you’ve been waiting
ages!) and head towards the modernist drama section at the back.
Desperately trying not to think
about the growing pile of ‘classics
you must read’ that sit by your bed,
undeniably unread, you pick up a
Beckett play, some Milton and a
couple of dictionaries of literary
terms for good measure. ‘It’ll be
different this time,’ you tell yourself. ‘I’ve been meaning to read
Waiting for Godot for ages.
Everyone knows that!’ Invariably
they become the latest strata on the
English canon in your room
(which, fortunately, is now not just
high enough, but wide enough to
function as a bedside table).
But what is it that makes
so eager to renounce all literature
that could be considered even
remotely popular? Is anyone at all
impressed when we present the
(largely fictitious) list of books we
read over the summer holidays?
More pertinently, does anyone
believe us? Why have we started to
look down on popular fiction with
such disdain?
Take for example Cecelia Ahern.
Before the publication of her first
novel, the story broke of the million-dollar deal under which she
sold the movie rights of the book.
She was feted as the new queen of
Irish literature; one couldn’t open a
magazine or switch on the television without seeing her beaming
face. But the mood quickly soured
when the book was published and
the first reviews came in. It turned
out that the fresh new face of Irish
letters had had the audacity to write
what can only be described as
‘chick-lit’. To be fair to Ms Ahern,
whether or not commentators had a
(broadsheet newspapers as opposed
to glossy magazines) can do little
more than grudgingly admit that
‘for what it is’, it’s pretty good. Or
to put it more plainly, trash, but
entertaining, diverting trash.
This level of literary
snobbery is frankly ridiculous. It’s
all very well to sniff disapprovingly in airports as you work your way
through Bleak House while the
greater part of the departure lounge
is engrossed in Circle of Friends.
But Dickens was arguably the
Cecelia Ahern of his day. His books
were published in serialised form
and each instalment was eagerly
“It’s about time we were able to openly admit
to reading books because we like them”
copy of the book to read (rights to
the movie were sold before the
book was completed), people
should really have guessed that a
work called PS. I Love You was
unlikely to be a gritty, indepth
analysis of the impact of globalisation on rural Ireland.
Significantly, regardless
of what the literary critics felt, the
book was a phenomenal success.
As were her next two novels. Even
if her debut novel was sold simply
on the basis of hype and a massive
marketing campaign, one must
attribute the success of her second
and third to her skill as an author
and her appeal to a massive section
of the literary market. Yet even the
best of her ‘serious’ reviews
anticipated. (Yes, this is all I
remember of the Senior Fresh
course on Victorianism). They
were read by a wide spectrum of
society (not just the English students – there was no such thing…
happy time). Not only that, but the
novel itself was looked down upon
as decidedly lower class.
Somewhere
between
Dickens and Cecelia Ahern (the
bookends of any serious study of
the novel) the novel managed to
gain massive cultural kudos and in
doing so, set an often indefinable
standard by which ‘good literature’
could be measured. Dickens was
clearly on one side of this line,
Ahern on the other. Those in
Dickens’s camp occupied them-
selves by sneering at the intellectual pygmies over the wall. On
Ahern’s side, the ‘intellectual pygmies’ got on with reading books
they enjoyed, secretly delighting in
the fact that those on the other side
would resort to making faces over a
fence before they’d sit down and
actually read any of the books they
had stacked beside them.
It appears that the joke is
truly on the English student. In
their rush to be taken seriously by
the literati, they have forgotten why
they put English down on the CAO
in the first place – because they like
reading. Undoubtedly there are
people lurking in the English
department who’ve discovered the
hidden delights in Tennyson, but I
seriously suspect that the large
majority recall wistfully the summers spent reading the entire
Marion Keyes back catalogue
while sunbathing with a diligence
not seen since the training of the
East German Olympic team.
And yet remarkably few
will admit to reading Keyes; Keats
is name-checked with far greater
frequency. While the Science students of the world can read novels
simply for relaxation and enjoyment, something inherent in the
English student turns reading into a
masochistic act, constantly searching for themes, motifs and allusions
to other great works of the English
canon instead of just sitting back
and enjoying the ride. One can
envisage a day, in the not too dis-
tant future, when a support group is
organised, following a twelve-step
programme under which English
students will learn to enjoy literature again – and to have a much
wider definition of literature.
Perhaps they will start by learning
to read Cosmo without feeling a
crushing sense of shame. The next
step will be to sit brazenly on the
second floor of the Ussher with the
complete works of Patricia
Cornwell in front of them. The programme could culminate with a
group of the most advanced participants heading into Hodges Figgis
and, with their heads held high,
buying a wide selection of the
recently published best-sellers.
It goes without saying that ‘proper’
literature can be hugely rewarding
and that it is well worth at least trying a more challenging book once
in a while. But can we please stop
being so po-faced about more popular books? Reading is a form of
relaxation, a hobby, a way to
escape reality and lose yourself in
world where the bus doesn’t splash
your new trousers and the cute boy
wants to go out with you, not your
mate. If we’re obliged to feel guilty
any time we pick up a book that
promises to deliver us to this world,
we’re missing out on one of the
best aspects of reading, and the reason many of us grew to love books
in the first place. It’s about time we
were able to openly admit to reading
books because we like them.
Diary of a BESS girl
Our girl around the Arts Block tells us how it is...
You may think that us BESS girls
envy people very little. We have
the looks, the men, the money, and
the potential careers... I could go
on. But you would be wrong. I
envy the people in the southern
hemisphere not having to go
through the misery of a January in
Ireland. I hate January. So, for this
week only, this BESS girl is using
the first half of her column as a
vent for a good old January moan.
Let’s weigh up the pros and cons.
A Passionate Jealousy
Kathryn Segesser examines how the fairytale romances we were spun in our youth have impacted the way we treat our relationships today.
Do you remember your first Disney
experience? Those movies, the staple of at least this writers’ childhood, introduced children to the
magical concept that life is fab
when you’re a singing Jamaican
crab.
Through the movie
Cinderella, I was also introduced to
the idea of the perfect “fairytale”
romance (complete with small talking rodents). Who didn’t have conversations with their friends that
centred around the concept of a
prince in shinning armour and a
happily ever after that, naturally
according to Disney, focused
squarely on romance? Now, admittedly, I might be appealing most
comprehensively to the female part
of the population, but to both males
and females I ask, when did the
fairytale develop the element of
“keeping up with the Joneses”?
When did relationship envy enter
into the equation?
Ok, so the idea of
Cinderella comparing her relationship with Prince Charming to
Sleeping Beauty’s with Prince
Philip seems perverse, but for the
modern day hero(ine) comparison
has become a natural part of any
healthy relationship.
In short, the concept that
it’ s healthy to obsess has translated
itself into the normal boyfriendgirlfriend relationship. Fairytales
are no longer for your eyes only.
In our lives it is considered strictly typical to compare different aspects with others. Thus,
for example, comparisons of various body parts with magazine pictures (almost always unhelpful for
general will to live), or comparisons of job with younger colleague
(furthering slide to depression) or,
finally, comparisons of life with
that of parents (enough to bring
you back from the abyss). This
constant awareness of others has,
increasingly in the modern world,
pervaded the relationship.
Thus, not only are we
busy comparing our relationships
with the sugar coated Disney versions, but also with those of our
friends, neighbours and, in some
extremely unhealthy and unreported cases, with our pet animals.
Celia and Bertie, both JF
BESS, were in a loving relationship for nearly a year when it fell
apart for what Celia describes as
his “roving eye” . Steady on now,
this isn’t the type of roving eye
usually experienced by those who
date BESS boys, but a different
concept altogether.
As
Celia
explains,
“Bertie had this high blown concept of how a relationship should
be. I was his first proper girlfriend
and he came to the table with his
cards full of images of roses and
picnics at twilight. I think his mother had fed him concepts of how a
loving couple behave and I simply
couldn’t live up the ideal. He’d
constantly be comparing how much
time we spent together, how well
we suited appearance wise and how
well our views on all sorts compared”.
In the end Celia found
that the relationship had deteriorated due to such an unhealthy desire
for an ideal. “I simply couldn’t take
it. I had to finish with Bertie, the
first love of my life, because of his
constant comparisons, not to mention questionable political beliefs”.
Another couple who
have been through trials and tribulations because of envy are Bono
and Ali. The couple, JS Science
and SF Microbiology respectively,
have a slightly happier tale to tell,
although, to quote Ali, “we’re not
out of the woods yet”.
Bono describes their
relationship of three years, as “near
perfect” for the first year, until
Ali’s housemate started a relationship with a mutual friend.
According to Bono “that was when
the cracks began. Ali suddenly
started to compare their relationship with ours. At first it was subtle
things, like if they met up we’ d
have to meet up, or if he brought
her a present, I’d have to do the
same.
Then, it became much
more extreme after about three
months. She was actively obsessed
with making sure that our relationship was seen as what can only be
described as “better” than theirs.
The only way to describe it was
jealousy, she thought their relationship had more going for it than ours
and thus became obsessed with the
differences. “That almost broke
us”. Bono however, atune to Ali’s
needs sat her down for a heart to
heart. “I explained to her that it was
impossible for me to be in a relationship where I was meant to feel
not up to a standard” . Ali soon
came around and claims the couple
are now stronger than ever; “I
realise now that envy is only
destructive. As long as I am happy
in my relationship with Bono comparisons are futile” .
A point raised by Bono
was the subtlety of forms of comparisons. Although, at their root,
manifestations of envy, small and
casual comparisons can be so nonchalant that it is often hard to see
the damage that they can cause.
Again, this can be traced
to a media that constantly tells us to
compare ourselves to others. Sex
and the City has something to
account for in this phase. By opening up the lives of four friends, so
explicitly (in more than one sense)
the show invited comparisons. It
was so obvious that Charlotte was
secretly jealous of Samantha, and
that Miranda was envious of basically anyone who wasn’t Miranda.
As the show was also very obviously about relationships, the comparisons naturally extended into
that arena.
In Carrie’s envy of
Charlottes marriage, Charlotte’s
envy of Miranda’s family and
Samantha’s envy of, well, well
never mind about Samantha, the
audience could trace their own
dynamic within their circle of
friends and remind themselves of
the different types of relationships
they themselves had, no doubt,
envied at different times.
Indeed, relationship envy
is not a static thing. Our ideal
changes over time and therefore so
to do the focuses of our envy. Thus
when young, and especially
impressionable Freshers, it is not
unusual for those in long term “loving” relationships to sigh for singledom. Later, when sick of stumbling from relationship to relationship, we long for the security of
long term commitment. Even when
our relationship status compares to
that of our friends we can’t stop the
jealousy. Indeed perhaps that’s
when its at its strongest - Desperate
Housewives take note!
So, is relationship envy
part of some deep set childhood
vision, or is it just neurosis born of
the competitive society in which
we live. Well, who’s to know? It is
indeed not peculiar to think that
comparing yourself to others is
only natural. Its what we’ve been
encouraged to do since the advent
of television and mass media (how
many housewives in the 1950s and
60s longed to live up to the Doris
Day “ideal” )?
In fact, it is probably in
that word ‘ideal’ that one can trace
the foundation of the jealousies
experienced today. Why is it that
we need ideals by which to measure our lives and all elements of
such? If this is born of Disney and
childhood stories, it is continued in
the media and mentalities of the
adult world.
Man is a funny animal in
that he is never happy unless he’s
comparing his life with others,
those who “have it perfect”. Part of
a natural tendency towards self pity
maybe, but this acceptance of jealousies have found their way into
our relationships.Cynical? Perhaps,
perhaps too much so for some, but
there is a strong element of truth in
the above statement. Ultimately
comparisons work both ways. We
may feel envious of those whom
we perceive to have relationships
that are better, more loving, finer,
define it how you will.
But, on the other hand,
we are also smug in the knowledge
that someone in our acquaintance is
likely to be at least a small bit jealous of our relationship status, whatever that might be. Is that because
we’re all unable to be happy and
content? Perhaps, but right now its
working for me and considerable
others. Put that in your script and
smoke it Cinders.
* Names have been changed to protect identities.
bed until March. I guarantee that
by the end of the month, you will
have given in to the supremacy of
your duvet over any diet fad.
Now, getting back to my normal
commentary. I am so envious of
one of my girlfriends right now.
She has the most amazing Karen
Millen dress she got in BTs and I
so want one but I obviously can’t
get one now she has it. The cut
will do nothing for her - I bet I’d
look far better in it. But I’m, like,
over it anyway, because my BESS
Pro: There are great sales in Ball dress is going to be jawdropJanuary. Everyone hopes to get pingly amazing this year. I want it
their hands on the half price item to be either vintage or custom
of the season that they have want- made (Daddy said he would pay).
ed since September.
Then we’ll see who’s envious. Not
that I don’t love the girl I menCon: Some people manage this. tioned above, I just hate it when
But for those of us who are not, other people beat me to good
like, a size 6 or a size 18, with clothes.
excessively small or large feet,
I also get really envious
chances are that there will be when people can just, like, party
nothing left in
all year then
your size. And
out with
“Possessive guys are come
even if it is, your
a
first.
credit card will not hot at all. Like, you N a t u r a l l y
probably still be were
obviously hot clever people
so maxed out
piss me
enough to score a really
from Christmas
off. I mean
shopping
that BESS girl in the first why should
you won’t be place so what’s your they all sit
able to afford
outside
the
problem?”
anything
anyPav gloating
way. And there is
and watching
no point running to Daddy, everyone else slogging it out in
because after the yacht at the Ussher. That’s why the Lecky
Christmas, he is so not buying you is my library of choice - all we
any more shoes until at least have to look at from the windows
February.
are the ridiculous American
tourists queuing up to look at the
Pro: New Year, New You. Take Book of Kells. They provide endcontrol of your life etc etc.
less entertainment for BESS girls
of all ages who snigger loudly at
Con: Maybe this is why so many their ludicrous American dress
people seem to be breaking up in sense.
January. Depressing. What ever
However, the one time
happened to all those Michaelmas when envy (jealousy, whatever) is
couples?
just not cool is when you see it in
a boyfriend. Boys do not suit
Pro: January is the season to get green. Just because we have a chat
fit, eat right and make resolutions. with the cute guy at the bar doesPerfect for bagging your new n’t mean we’re going to go and
man. Trust me, the rest of your jump into bed with him ok? (Well,
year group will be starving them- not immediately anyway). No,
selves, and you should follow suit. really. Possessive guys are not hot
No one wants to be the beached at all. Like, you were obviously
whale at Bondi. And what with all hot enough to score a BESS girl in
the advertising around, there the first place so what’s your probshould be enough momentum to lem? I know we’re blonde but we
keep you going until you get to a know a good thing when we’re
size 6. (And then you could take shagging one.
advantage of the sales and everyI’ve heard that everyone
thing!) But you’ve forgotten. It’s should be happy with what
January.
they’ve got, but there’s nothing
wrong with a little bit of ambition,
Major Con: You wake up at 6.30 is there? I mean, if we had all been
am, manage to fight the urge for happy being knackers living in
hot buttered toast as you swallow inner-city flats, Dalkey, elitist pridown the two chunks of pineapple vate education and the Arts block
that your new diet allows you, and royal family that is BESS may
you prepare to jog the three miles never have been created. But
to college. You open the door and thank God they were. For everyshock horror! It’s minus two one else to envy.
degrees and it’s lashing down.
Suddenly the impulse to get fit
and healthy is overcome by a
powerful inclination to go back to
10
Tuesday January 24, 2006
Film Editors:Rebecca Jackson & Alexander Christie-Miller
Film
Trinity News
Golden Globes? Forget it!
he’ll be a former teenage wizard.
There are even fewer movies about
them. I mean he could go and star
in a movie called ‘December Boys’
about awkward adolescence and
get graphically deflowered by a
Spaniard twice his age… Way to go
Dan.
James Von Simson offers a retrospective of some
of the movies of 2005, as he inaugurates TN’s
very own awards ceremony...
The Trinity News has always possessed a certain level of grandiose
self-importance; so in the film section we feel that we deserve, nay
have the right, to start the prizegiving season early with our own
selection of awards. Variety has
already ranked the TNAAs (pronounced tu-nnnn-aaaaaaaa-ssssss)
between the Academy of Motion
Picture Arts and Sciences Awards
(Oscars)
and
the
British
Association of Film and Television
Awards (BAFTAs) in levels of
prestige. What fools. If you want to
know the hottest oscar tips, forget
the Golden Globes and read on:
suited & booted to play the fascist
stormtroopers. Pity for a movie
showing a suicide bombing on the
London Underground they decided
to release it on the 8th July.
The Most Unfortunate Timing
Award:
“To play the man in
black in the Johnny
Cash Biopic ‘I Walk
the Line’, Joaquin not
only learned to sing
and play the guitar,
but he also became
an alcoholic and beat
his girlfriend. What a
hero.”
‘V FOR VENDETTA’
It’s now back in post-production.
Millions were spent on the promotion for the Wachowski Brothers’
new sci-fi outing ‘V for Vendetta’.
Considering it was set in a futuristic totalitarian London, the world
premier couldn’t have been held
anywhere else. The Odeon
Leicester Square was booked.
Thousands of extras were hired,
The Daniel Radcliffe Award For
Trying Not To Be Harry Potter for
the Rest of His Life:
DANIEL RADCLIFFE
Now you’ve got to feel sorry for
Dan. He’s a teenage wizard. And
there aren’t many movies about
Gayest Cowboy:
HEATH LEDGER
Not many people know this, but the
Western is the most homoerotic
genre in film. Anything that macho
must be. Clint Eastwood in
‘Unforgiven’? Gay. Allan Ludd in
‘Shane’? Gay. Garry Cooper in
‘High Noon’? Bi. Any character
played by John Wayne? Gay all the
way. ‘Course they don’t talk about
it. Wasn’t the done thing back then.
Westerns were always about saving
the lady. They all played makebelieve. Then Ang Lee made
‘Brokeback Mountain’. A proper
gay cowboy movie. You even see
them do it. Kind of.
The Cool & Good Looking Award
for Being Cool & Good Looking:
An oscar with Edmund Burke’s head BRAD PITT
pasted on. If Trinity did give film
It’s
awards, they might look a bit like this. eleven
years
teenage wizards. In a few years
been
since
he actually had to
act. ‘Twelve Monkeys’ was the last
‘Zatoichi’- Samurai bloodromp flicked my switch...
Alex Christie-Miller
There’s no doubt that E-Bay has
revolutionised Christmas. In former years it was with a sense of
impending horror that you nervously opened that package from
Grandma, inevitably to find some
enormous technicolor jumper for
which you would not only have to
feign a liking, but actually wear for
the rest of the day. But now one has
the soothing consolation that somewhere on the web a middle-aged
bird-watcher has been dreaming of
that exact same jumper, and will
pay you through the nose to get it.
It was thus with carefree
abandon that I ripped happily
through my unwrapping this time
round, and when I pulled out the
DVD ‘Zatoichi’, it was to E-Bay
that I gave my first silent thanks.
My family have generally overestimated my appetite for obscure,
foreign, art-house films in recent
years, and whilst a back-to-back
session of Kieslowski’s ‘Three
Colours’ trilogy might sound an
interesting proposition in principle,
when it comes down to it these
films don’t exactly jump off the
shelf.
However partly through
my flatmate’s recommendation,
and in a vain attempt to anaesthetise myself against the impending horror of leaving college, last
week ‘Zatoichi’ did indeed make it
into my DVD player.
It was a choice I didn’t
ous bloodshed is on the cards.
In spite of his totally
innocuous appearance, Zatoichi
manages to attract the attention of
pretty much every sword-toting
bad guy who comes his way.
Severed limbs and surging spouts
of CGI-generated gore are the
order of the day, as Zatoichi deftly
hacks his way toward his inevitable
showdown with the talented and
“In spite of his totally innocuous appearance,
Zatoichi manages to attract the attention of
pretty much every sword-toting bad guy who
comes his way. Severed limbs and surging
spouts of gore are the order of the day”
regret. On one level, the film offers
your typical dose of intense,
bloody, samurai action. Set in 19th
century Japan, ‘Zatoichi’ is the
story of a legendary blind swordsman of the same name who disguises his formidable skills behind
the façade of a humble itinerant
masseuse. When he happens to
walk into the middle of a vicious
gang war, you know that some seri-
Takeshi Kitano as the blind swordsman in ‘Zatoichi’
along with his samurai adversary Hattori.
ruthless samurai Hattori, hired
assassin of the Ginzo gang.
The film is enormously
entertaining as a straightforward
action movie, but director/writer/
lead actor Kitano ‘Beat’ Takeshi
takes it much further than this.
Whilst working within the timeworn genre of the samurai movie,
‘Zatoichi’ nonetheless manages to
seem profoundly original through
the creation of a uniquely taut
atmosphere at once suspenseful
and meditative, through which the
violence erupts with a vicious
intensity and economy of force
akin to a controlled explosion.
Takeshi’s experience as
an actor is evident not only in his
own idiosyncratic, unassuming,
and quietly humorous rendering of
the legendary Zatoichi (about
whom 26 films have already been
made in Japan), but also in the performances he elicits from his cast,.
None more so than
Tadanobu Asano, who plays the
role of Hattori Genosuke- the troubled samurai who has fallen into
the employment of the Ginzo gang
in order to support his sick wife.
His icy, impassive presence on
screen has an undercurrent of pent
up rage which seems to epitomise
the sense of impending violence
beneath the crisp, hushed atmosphere of the film.
Takeshi is famed as
something of a renaissance man in
Japan- not only has he been a
famous TV entertainer and movie
actor since the 1980s, but he has
also written a number of novels,
essays, poetry, and is a skilled
painter and cartoonist.
After his 1997 film
‘Hana-Bi’, which won the Golden
Lion award at the Venice Film
Festival, Takeshi also achieved
fame in the wider world as an arthouse director. The really extraordinary thing about ‘Zatoichi’ is that
he seems to have succeeded in
bringing together the popular and
art-house aspects of his career to
create a film that is in many ways a
basic a blood-bath as you could
wish for, but still has managed to
win over the high brow critics- so
much so that Takeshi took the ‘Best
Director’ award for the film at
Venice in 2003.
Even the end of the film
is strikingly innovative, and (without giving too much away)
‘Zatoichi’ concludes with a scene
that acts at once as a celebration
within the movie but also as an
acknowledgement and celebration
of the artifice and spectacle of cinema.
So go and rent it out and
watch it- it’s really good. It might
even entice me to go ahead with
that Kieslowski marathon- but
don’t worry, I won’t write an article
about that.
“Telling it like it is...”
Bored of long-winded reviews yammering on about cinematography, script nuances and virtuoso performances? This
new column is for you. Every issue we will be showcasing a review from a writer with no cinematic pretensions whatsoever. To hit off we have Adam Ward and Philip Jones, alias Trinity's hockey virtuosos- see? I just can't help the flowery film language- they can though. Read on...
King Kong is more flawed than a Kevin Keegan defence; everything has been placed on
action and a total lack of editing and script is apparent. The film begins with the hapless Jack
Black; more cheesy than Dennis Rodman’s chat-up lines, attempting to save his failing documentary career. He embarks on a trip to some Island that just so happens to have a huge
monkey and a load of weird natives.
Kong falls in love with Watts and leads us on a roller coaster ride through the jungle. This movie, like AC Milan, manages a decent 45 minutes. Complete with some awesome
special effects, Samoan-England -esk fights, finished with Adrian Brody stepping up to the
plate, becoming the hero to save Watts and inadvertently capturing Kong in the process.
Then the cheese returns, some fantastic awkward long pauses from Black, and the
wondering of what the hell Watts is actually doing starts to dawn on you. Then the finale with
Kong resting atop the Empire State, Jackson wants us to believe that there is some deep
meaningful undercurrent to this movie: there isn’t. “The planes got him…. No- Beauty killed
the Beast.’ Cheers Jack, please pass me the bucket.
Peter Jackson- cheesy
does it.
semblance of any acting ability for
Mr William Bradley Pitt. Since
then he’s just been cool and good
looking. ‘Oceans Eleven’ was crap,
yet successful because it had the
highest ratio of normal to cool and
good looking since Frank Sinatra,
Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr. et al
made, well, Oceans Eleven. Now
he’s one half of the most cool and
good looking couple in the history
of mankind. No? Well explain the
point of ‘Mr & Mrs Smith’ to me
then.
Best Scene of a Sexually Gratuitous
Nature:
KING KONG
Naomi Watts and King Kong consummate their blossoming love
aff… No wait; I dreamt that didn’t
I?
The Eddy Murphy-Didn’t-I-UsedTo-Be-Funny-Once Award:
STEVE MARTIN
Eddy Murphy’s actually done it.
He’s become so unfunny he’s actually managed to negate ‘Raw’. A
monument to comedy has been
wiped off everyone’s cerebral cortex. The man’s worth about $90
million and still decided to do
‘Daddy Day Care’. I mean what the
hell? Now, most people don’t ever
remember Steve Martin being
funny. I certainly didn’t. Then I
saw some of his old stand-up stuff.
It’s a shame really. He was actually
rather talented.
The Special Recognition Award:
JOAQUIN PHOENIX
Christian Bale nearly got to keep
this award last year for the supreme
effort made to loose five stone (to
drop down to eight) on a diet of an
apple a day to play the eponymous
Machinist. But to play the man in
black in the Johnny Cash Biopic ‘I
“The Western is the
most homoerotic
genre in film.
Anything that macho
must be. Clint
Eastwood in
‘Unforgiven’? Gay.”
Walk the Line’, Joaquin not only
learned to sing and play the guitar,
but he also became an alcoholic
and beat his girlfriend. What a
hero.
The Chickenshit Award:
one of those actors who I’d go and
see the movie they were in because
they were in it. But since ‘Van
Wilder’ he’s been a complete wuss.
He’s always the best thing in any of
the movies he’s in; ‘Blade Trinity’,
‘Amityville Horror’, the recently
released ‘Just Friends’. Have some
balls man. You’re a good actor. Try
doing a decent movie for once.
The Inspiration Award:
‘MURDERBALL’
Well it wasn’t going to be the pseudo-creationist-crap March of the
Penguins; though frankly that
should be given a special award for
managing to fool millions of fundamentalist Christians into believing
that other people might stop laughing at them behind their backs.
Just. Because. YOU.
Don’t. Understand. It. Doesn’t.
Mean. God. Did. It... Cretins.
Murderball on the other
hand, brought a tear to my eye. God
doesn’t have the style to create psychotic wheelchair rugby. Broke
your back? Boo-fucking-hoo. Get a
Mad Max style wheelchair and you
can play the greatest sport in the
history of the world. Almost made
me want to watch the next
Paralympics.
RYAN REYNOLDS
Now I like Ryan Reynolds. He’s
Dublin video rentals
put to the test
Mary Garboden
When I have an evening free from
social or academic obligations, I
like to go see an intellectually stimulating play, followed by dinner at
a charming bistro and then to drink
champagne cocktails until sunrise.
Then I wake up, groan
because it’s 6pm and I’ve fallen
asleep on the sofa – again – had
for €3, while everything else
ranged from €2.50-€4, presumably depending on age. The guy
working there was really friendly,
though he only scored 50% on my
film knowledge test (cleverly disguised as, “Can you help me? I’m
drawing a blank on some film
titles...”) When asked what the latest Danny Boyle film was called,
he got it right away – ‘Millions’ –
with bonus points for being able to
locate it in the shop immediately.
that film” game, but did so in a
manner that implied he was happy
to answer my questions more to
show off his knowledge than help a
customer. He was smug,, dismissive, and extraordinarily pale,
causing the main impression I
walked out with to be that Laser
should require their staff to participate in some form of social activity
on days off, preferably outside in
the sunshine.
For variation, my final
Chartbusters- You won’t get ‘Citizen Kane’, but you won’t geek a pallid, patronising geek either.
that dream – again – and ask
whichever flatmate’s around if she
fancies renting a film.
For students with limited
budgets, video stores are key
sources of hours of entertainment
that provide something to think
about other than that essay you
should be working on. But in
Dublin, not all these shops are created equal, and it can be difficult to
know which ones to patronise and
why. To find out, I visited three
rental places near city centre and
rated them according to selection,
price, and quality of staff.
The first shop I tried out
was the Chartbusters across from
Saint Patrick’s Cathedral. Apart
from having no Classics section –
something key to my choice of
shop – they had a surprisingly large
and diverse selection. A relatively
extensive “world cinema” section
was next to their vast shelves of
new releases, and a “cult” section
was a point of interest, consisting
of those films some people get a bit
funny about and memorise and
show signs of potentially stalking
the stars of – you know, ‘Moulin
Rouge’, ‘Titanic’, ‘The Crow’....
New releases were going
for €5.25 per night, world cinema
He fell down on identifying the film directed by Martin
Scorsese starring Daniel DayLewis, however, – ‘Gangs of New
York’ – not even getting it when I
included Leonardo DiCaprio in the
credits and said I thought it took
place in New York. In my opinion,
though, friendliness and enthusiasm to help made up for this shortcoming.
“Pushing through the
small door into the
living-room sized
area, I immediately
saw that the selection
was pretty dire.”
My next stop was Laser
on George’s Street. With the best
selection of genres and films I’ve
come across in Dublin, I had slated
this place to be a winner before I
walked in. And with regard to
selection, it was. Prices were
slightly lower than Chartbusters,
with new releases at €5 and most
other DVDs for €3.50. The category in which Laser fell down, however, was staff.
The employee I spoke to
received top marks in the “name
visit was to a small, local video
shop – the kind you go to for the
sole reason that it’s only 3 minutes
down the road. My experience at
Manor Video on Manor Street in
Stoneybatter was mixed. Pushing
through the small door into the living-room sized area, I immediately
saw that the selection was pretty
dire.
Had I been in the market
for something starring Britney
Murphy or Bruce Willis, I
would’ve been golden, but without
venturing into the porn section, that
was about the extent of my options.
The lone employee was happy to
chat, but not about films, though
with prices between €3.50 and €4,
if I fancied seeing ‘Die Hard’
again, this place would be a bit of a
saving.
The only conclusion to
be drawn is that shop selection
depends on the customer’s priorities. If you want a nice chat, don’t
go to Laser, but then again, they’re
the only one of three who stock
‘Citizen Kane’. And, of course,
Manor Video and its equivalents in
any neighbourhood are just up the
road, and it looks like rain...
12
Music Editor:Steve Clarke
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
MUSIC
For whom the bell tolls
Bell X1’s Dave Geraghty on touring, the Meteor Awards, and Keanu Reeves
Steve Clarke
I don’t often visit bands’ messages
boards. Generally they seem to be
full of people with way too much
time on their hands, posting threads
(on average) about twenty times a
day and blurring the line between
fan and fanatic. However, as I was
perusing Bell X1’s website whilst
researching this interview I decided
to throw caution to the wind, and
hesitantly ventured into the dark
heart of fandom. My worst fears
were confirmed. I found a thread
about who would play the band in a
theoretical film about Bell X1, but
in fairness, some of the casting was
inspired- Matt Le Blanc as bassist
Dominic Phillips and Elijah
Woods’ Frodo Baggins as Damien
Rice. The resemblance is there. I
asked guitarist/keyboardist Dave
Geraghty about the fans’ choice to
play him: a two-way tie between
Keanu Reeves and Tom Cruise.
“I’m so insulted at the
Keanu Reeves,” remarks Geraghty,
sounding audibly upset. “If these
are meant to be in some way representative I’m so insulted. I’m so
hurt. Keanu fucking Reeves. For
me his acting potential was
summed up in ‘Bill and Ted’s
Bogus Journey.’” What does he
think about Tom Cruise then?
“Well it’s not a whole lot better
now but it’s the lesser of two evils.
I could be the one who brings the
scientology into the band and find
some fourteen year old to marry.
That’d be pretty accurate.”
Indeed. Bell X1 have
been doing quite well for themselves recently. Their latest album
Flock debuted at No.1 in the Irish
Charts upon its release last
October, achieving platinum status
by Christmas. They have been
nominated for “Best Irish Band”
and “Best Irish Album” at this
year’s Meteor Music Awards.
They’ve sold out tours in the both
the U.S. and the U.K., and their
biggest show yet, in Dublin’s RDS
was just obvious to us. The Keane
tour I enjoyed a bit more- we got to
hang out with the lads a little more,
even though with the success of
their album they hardly had two
minutes to spare…they were constantly off doing press, interviews,
TV stuff; but then the time we did
“At times we felt kinda at odds playing [support for Starsailor], playing our music to their
fans... The Keane tour I enjoyed a bit more- we
got to hang out with the lads a little more... the
time we did get to spend with them, it was
really nice.”
on the 31st January, has also sold
out. They’ve even had a song featured on the O.C., the holy grail of
trendy indie music. Will 2006 be
the year of Bell X1? “We just hope
for more of the same I
suppose…for people to continue
liking the music and for us, having
the bit of success we’ve had, to
avoid the Irish begrudgery,” opines
Geraghty. “But in another way if
you hear that it means you’re doing
well I suppose. It’s an indication
you’re doing well if people start
bitching about you, which seems to
be quite an Irish thing.”
The back-biting inherent
to the Irish music scene has been
pretty well documented, but I wondered; was this was the only price
Bell X1 has had to pay for success?
On this line, I asked Geraghty
about their supports slots for Keane
and Starsailor. “At times we felt
kinda at odds playing their gigs,
playing our music to their fans-not
that people who listen to one type
of music can’t listen to another, but
y’know it felt quite obvious to us
that we were playing music quite
different to Starsailor. Maybe it
get to spend with them, it was really nice.”
Not probing for details of
the rock and roll excesses of
Keane’s tour bus (but later wishing
I had), Geraghty moved on to discussing Bell X1’s own gigs and the
UK release of Flock in March. “I
think I prefer smaller venues doing
our shows- I think it’s more important, more beneficial to be seen to
be doing your own shows. I don’t
think people go out and buy your
album on the back of seeing you as
support, and even if they do like
you there’s always the psychological impact that they’re there to see
the main band and not you. Even
though you might impress them
they kinda want to wait and see if
they hear any more about you
before they invest in you, so to
speak…I think people have been
keeping a close eye on us from
doing Starsailor and Keane, and
even Snow Patrol and Somerset
House,
those
supports
in
London…I think people will
realise that we’re in for the long
haul when we release the new
album.”
I also enquired whether
Dave felt confident about the
Meteor Award nominations, which
the band is also playing at. “Are U2
in there?” he quips. “I’m kinda
secretly positive, but not anymore,
because I’m telling people. Its been
an interesting few months for Bell
X1, y’know with the album going
in at No.1 and its actually at number 11 again I’ve just found out. It
creeped its way back up the charts.
People are buying the record and
people are talking about the band
so it’s hard to know really- there’s
a lot of great bands in there.”
Perhaps the most bizarre
incident in Bell X1’s recent history
was their inclusion on the soundtrack to an episode of the O.C.
Their song “Eve, The Apple of My
Eye” was the background music to
the most watched scene in the
purely male perspective on the subject. But it did garner us some
attention-it was on the news
because Christian groups were up
in arms about it and every time it
was on the news it had “Eve” playing in the background of the clip.
We’ve been booked to play all the
lesbian festivals in the states.”
Before wrapping up the
interview I asked Geraghty how he
felt about their imminent sold-out
date in the RDS. With support from
Jose Gonzalez (“he’s becoming
known as the guy from the bouncing ball ad”) and also from (the
really very promising) Waiting
Room, he seems enthused: “I’m
really looking forward to it. I can’t
wait to be standing on that big
stage and looking out on a sea of
people- its quite spine tingling.”
Their song “Eve, The Apple of My Eye” was the
background music to the most watched scene
in the entire series, which, so I’m told, involved
two of the female leads, Marissa and Alex,
sharing a kiss. With tongues. ..”you couldn’t
have dreamed that up really, for our band to be
associated with such an interesting controversy.”
entire series, which, so I’m told,
involved two of the female leads,
Marissa and Alex, sharing a kiss.
With tongues. So was this just a
happy coincidence, or divine providence? “Well, we didn’t say you
can use the song but it has to
involve two very pretty girls kissing on the beach…I mean you
couldn’t have dreamed that up really, for our band to be associated
with such an interesting controversy. Though that might be just a
Postscript: During the course of
this interview Dave Geraghty also
suggested that the pyramids were
not in fact built by the Eyptians, but
instead by the Irish. He may have
been prompted.
Bell X1 play the RDS on 31st
January and the Meteor Awards
on the 2nd February. Visit
www.bellx1.com for more
details.
Fade to Gray:
Live at the Point: David Gray
with Rodrigo y Gabriela
Conor McQuillan
Dear reader(s), I begin by pointing
out that David, for all his virtues, is
not someone I would ordinarily go
to see in concert. I might if he
invited me. Courtesy of Rodrigo y
Gabriela (or their label, rather than
them personally), I got a free ticket, so I went along to see them play
what turned out to be a disappointingly short set (just under 30 minutes) – even that amazing sequence
in which Rodrigo gradually
increases the tempo of a riff until,
at its climax, his guitar fills The
Point with a sound akin to a helicopter engine, was trunkated.
They were well received of course
(obviously some of their loyal following had been unable to get tickets to the university gigs), but the
bulk of the crowd was just waiting
for David, enjoying the comfort of
their seats after a long day at work
and all that standing out in the
foyer.
In fairness, though, the
age difference in fan bases present
is probably easily explained by the
relative obscurity of Rodrigo y
Gabriela in the eyes of the general
public. That won’t last much
longer, though.
And so to David himself.
He was greeted with fairly enthusiastic applause from the people who
had paid for their tickets, as he
immediately struck into openers
‘Alibi’ followed by hit ‘Sail Away’.
During which I noticed that the
drummer was wearing one of the
most intriguing shirts I’ve ever
seen – something akin to how a 4
year old might depict the
Apocalypse.
‘Please Forgive Me’ – a
good song to begin with – was further endeared to the crowd with
minor lyrical alterations ‘…moving out across the Irish Sea…deep
into that Celtic mystery’. The song
also contained what was (I
“The crowd suddenly
seemed a bit numbed
too – the problem
here with trying to
translate well-written,
thoughtful love songs
to a live setting,
where people want
something to dance
to”
Bell X1: Living life in the fast lane.
The Strokes:
First
Impressions
of Earth
Cian Traynor
First impressions of Strokes
albums can easily be deceptive,
their efforts in such a well-worn
genre understandably requiring that
extra little bit of time to impress
enough to draw you in. But three
albums into their career, and having never quite lived up to the
explosive hype they initially found
themselves gathering, The Strokes
may now be asking more of the listener's patience than ever.
There are no prizes for
recognising the sounds fuelling the
opening two tracks, the band using
the signatures of Television to open
proceedings on "You Only Live
Once" followed by the catchy single "Juicebox," which, while
sounding every bit the tribute to
The Cramps, also features the best
laid burst of energy on the album.
To be sure, no surprises
are going to be pulled, but as the
Verlaine-like licks continue, the
tracks manage to be held together
reasonably well...until it becomes
apparent that Julian Casablancas'
lethargic vocals are intent on sapping any vitality out of the album.
From "On the Other Side" on, a
trend begins to emerge: the singer's
sluggish, half-hearted croon
smacks of a lack of effort and
leaves you with the impression that
many of these songs aren't worth
getting out of bed for.
On the upside, the
dynamic flutter of "Vision of
Division," the pop precision of "Ize
of the World," and the unassuming
"Fear of Sleep" ensure the Strokes'
faithful have a reassuring nest of
quality to nuzzle, each contending
with "Juicebox" to be perceived as
the album's best.
Though the production and overall
sound can't be faulted, “First
Impressions...” is a fair if not altogether unremarkable release that's
going over ground that has
nowhere left to take us, and as a
consequence, this is drained of all
originality.
thought) the funniest…no, the only
funny moment of the concert...after
the line ‘I got half a mind to scream
out loud’, many of those assembled
screamed in unison. After the following line, ‘I got half a mind to
die’, there was a tangible quietening – there was a missed opportunity here. The screens should have
displayed a sequence of instructions along the lines of
‘sing…sing…sing…scream…sing
…fake death/collapse…sing’ – just
to lighten to the mood, albeit in a
quite contrary way.
Well, I thought it was a
funny idea - the potential sight of
2000 people staggering from imaginary gunshots or feigning heart
attacks.
Moving on...‘My Oh
My’ continued in the same vein,
with Gray then donning his electric
guitar and launching into new song
‘The One I Love’ with gusto. It was
at this point that I noticed the
woman in front of me rubbing the
neck
of
her
husband/boyfriend/brother-in-law.
How cute.
The occasional line
between songs gave the crowd
something extra to cheer about –
even if “This city’s changed a lot
since I first came” didn’t quite
match the insight or poetry of
lyrics such as ‘Take this silver lining…and put it in your pretty
head’.
And now I have an
admission to make…just after the
“I have an admission
to make…just after
the next song ‘Don’t
Ever Lie, Don’t Steal’,
I…eh, fell asleep”
next song ‘Don’t Ever Lie, Don’t
Steal’, I…eh, fell asleep. Yes, you
read it right. Glance across if you
must – it’s still printed there. I was
obviously tired, but, let’s be honest
– I wouldn’t have fallen asleep during a remotely exciting concert.
But David, if you’re reading this,
don’t worry – I fully appreciate
that I must have slept through the
most exciting 20 minutes. Just my
luck. I woke up with a pen stuck to
my face, and no sensation in my
legs. The crowd suddenly seemed
a bit numbed too – the problem
here lies not with David and his
band’s considerable talents as performers, but with trying to translate
well-written, thoughtful love songs
to a live setting, where people want
something to dance to. Unless of
course they’re perfectly happy to
sit, appreciate and clap during each
chorus and song ending.
And then the band left –
hopefully not insulted by any snoring. But what of ‘Babylon’? The
crowd finally found its voice and
coaxed David et al back on stage.
As he sang the words ‘…what we
gonna do, when the money runs
out?’, I couldn’t help but wonder
how many of the crowd had been
prompted into thinking about pension reforms.
As the show drew to a
close, the chorus line “Tell me
something I don’t already know”
was repeated so often it became
self-fulfilling in a way. Finally the
first notes of ‘Babylon’ rang out,
and everyone seemed happier for
it. Clapping and smiling and
whooping and whatnot. Certainly
one of the best free gigs I’ve ever
been to – having said that, I’d be
plain embarrassed to name some of
the others.
Talking to his quietly
adoring fans after ‘Please Forgive
Me’, David said something interesting – “…if I had another fifty
like that, man, I could rule the
world. Where the fuck did that
come from?!”. I wouldn’t quite go
that far, but I wouldn’t stop him
trying. Those fifty songs mightn’t
crush China, but they’d be well
worth hearing.
Music Editor:Steve Clarke
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
13
MUSIC
2005: The Year in Gigs
Mark Rodgers casts a critical
eye on the year that was
When the BBC ever gets around to
following up their ‘I Love’ series of
programmes with one dedicated to
the this decade, what will they
come with for ‘I Love 2005’?. Will
some non entity of a celebrity
inform us that Crazy Frog was really quite an ingenious post-modern
take on the idea that people will
only make music in the future for
the purposes of letting you know
when you have a phone call, or that
2005 was the year that poverty was
finally made history?
In any case, any such
look back on this particular orbit of
the earth around the sun will probably fail to look at the year in concerts. So, in the interests of those
fresh having received (possibly on
his backside, although I’m not
quite sure where these things actually go) the Conor Oberst ‘stamp of
approval’ for an earnest and intimate style of music that gosh darnit, just hits you where it hurts
every time. However, the feverish
excitement that greeted his every
inhalation of oxygen didn’t tally
with the actual quality of his performance. I don’t think I’ve ever
seen so many people want to their
throw their underwear at a singer
before, and that was just the males
in the audience. Boom Boom! The
whole thing was distinctly average,
he had a nice voice, had some
decent songs, but there was nothing
“If I had to choose my most memorable gig of
the year it would be Mike Watt...my entire
moral universe, centred around the twin solar
systems of the irony of Belle and Sebastian
and sarcasm of Alan Partridge was on the
point of collapsing within itself as my shallowness of my existence up until then suddenly
dawned upon me...”
who come after us and may think to
themselves: “I wonder, was there
any good concerts in 2005?”, I
give you, a select, but indispensable guide to the last twelve months
of musical entertainment. All will
be included: the good, the bad, and
the ‘what the hell was I thinking
that night that made me think I had
better things to do when X was
playing?!’
Willy Mason arrived at
the Sugar Club some time around
the start of January or February
particularly memorable either.
Perhaps, I’m being a bit harsh, but
I didn’t really see the fuss. There
are millions of these singer songwriters about, and there wasn’t
anything here that really set him
apart.
Everybody’s favourite
Brighton six-piece, the Go! Team,
landed in April. A sizeable number
of people crammed into the Village
to see if their blend of Sonic Youth
style guitars and sample-heavy hip
hop could be translated into a live
Mark Rodgers, mid existential crisis
setting. Sadly, despite the general
greatness of the record, and their
limitless energy, the Go! Team
were a bit underwhelming; you just
couldn’t hear those recorder solos
over the guitars. What’s that all
about? A special shout out must go
to support act DJ Scotch Egg
though, who managed a standing
ovation for a set that consisted of
playing a game boy, throwing
scotch eggs at the crowd and roaring at everyone to fuck off. Genius.
And so to May, if I had to
choose my most memorable gig of
the year it would be Mike Watt, cofounder of the Minutemen at the
Village, not for musical quality but
for a Damascene conversion that I
very nearly had. At one point in the
proceedings, Watt turned to the
crowd to tell us that we’d just have
to be patient and bear with him
through some of the more admittedly weird stuff he was playing,
because he’d just come back from a
very dark place recently, and he’d
realised that in life, you have to follow your dreams; for him, music
was therapy. His songs helped him
realise who he was, and that basically, you should try and live a fulfilling and meaningful life by being
sincere about everything you do. At
this point, my entire moral universe, centred around the twin solar
systems of the irony of Belle and
Sebastian and sarcasm of Alan
Partridge was on the point of collapsing within itself as my shallowness of my existence up until then
suddenly dawned upon me.
Fortunately, his next song was a
bass heavy dirge, with whispering
nonsensical vocals about stuffing a
turkey with two balls that lasted
five minutes too long. Thankfully it
means I still go to sleep with
Stephen Malkmus on my headphones:
“I'm here to sing a song,
a song about privilege, the spikes
you put on your feet when you
were crawling and dancing, to the
top of the human shitpile.
Shitpile!”
I did actually enjoy some
gigs in 2005. LCD Soundsystem
were brilliant, not only for the fact
that the energy and diversity of the
album became all the more apparent on stage, but for the general
idea that a fat beardy man, in denim
jeans and a plain white t shirt who
shouted into a microphone was, for
Album Reviews
WOLF
PARADE
APOLOGIES
TO THE
QUEEN MARY
Niall Kelly
To be cool among the indie-rock
collective in 2005, one only needed
to utter three simple words: THE.
ARCADE. FIRE. Setting the musical world alight with their energetic
and engaging debut album,
Funeral, Messrs Butler and company effortlessly altered the course of
the musical bandwagon, bundling
it with ease from the well-trodden
path of skinny ties and post-punk
indie
imitators.
Earmarking
Montreal as the musical scene du
jour, The Arcade Fire’s success
sent industry figureheads scouring
around poorly-lit basements and
dingy clubs in search of a similar
sound and similar success. Among
those hoisted from obscurity and
tipped for success in 2006 were
Brooklyn newbies Clap Your
Hands Say Yeah, as well as industry stalwarts Broken Social Scene.
But, following the release of their
fabulous debut album Apologies
…, it may in fact be Montreal quartet Wolf Parade, quietly gnashing
their teeth in the background, that
steal the hearts and minds of music
lovers this year.
Formed in 2003 as a collaborative effort between co-vocalists Dan Boeckner and Spencer
Krug (each sings lead vocals on
roughly half of the album’s tracks),
Wolf Parade have excited and
delighted with a thrilling fusion of
guitars, drums, keyboards and electronics. Weaving these elements
into a musical landscape that is in
equal parts enchanting and haunting, Apologies …is a masterclass
in how to effectively blend disparate musical layers, with no one
ingredient dominating to the detriment of the overall sound. Yet, at
the same time, this wonderfully
unified musical background is littered with catchy guitar hooks,
melancholy keyboard intros and
driving drum beats, ensuring that
the powerful individuality of the
various instruments is never forgotten.
Though intricate and
complex, this coherently diverse
sound provides Krug and Boeckner
with an excellent platform from
which they can captivate listeners.
The two work excellently together,
alternating with ease, and often
combining to create some wonderfully off-kilter harmonies. Though
their voices are sometimes difficult
to comprehend, once understood,
they reveal tales of childhood
dreams, disillusionment with the
modern world, lost love, and a
strange obsession with ghosts.
Lyrically, the band’s disenchantment dominates - on one of the
album’s standout tracks, ‘Dear
Sons And Daughters Of Hungry
Ghosts’, Krug moans that “we'll
say it's in God's hands / but God
doesn't always have the best goddamn plans, does he?”. However,
the overall tone of the album is prevented from becoming overly
depressive, as Wolf Parade cleverly
disguise the cynical expression,
allowing it to soar above deceptively upbeat rhythms.
When it comes to Wolf
Parade, it is difficult to find a
review of the band that doesn’t
make reference to the band’s network of illustrious friends. Modest
Mouse frontman Isaac Brock, who
effectively discovered the band in
2003, is credited as producer on
Apologies …. The Arcade Fire
have made no effort to disguise
their soft-spot for the band, offering support slots on numerous
occasions during their propulsion
to stardom. However, once one
steps back from the deluge of
name-dropping and allows the
intricate musical brilliance of
Apologies ... to reveal itself, it is
easy to appreciate Wolf Parade as
one of the most exciting ‘new’
bands of the moment. This year’s
Arcade Fire? Don’t be surprised!
Apologies To The Queen Mary is
out now on Sub Pop Records
Sons And Daughters: Their music inspires violence.
about an hour so, a musical god.
Sometimes, in my quieter
moments, I like to think that if you
looked really closely at James
Murphy on that magical sunny day
at Oxegen, you could see that his
white top was actually stained with
some type of spaghetti bolognese
sauce, thereby confirming that he
too is just as fallible and human as
the rest of us; and that anyone can
become a pop star.
Another high point was
Sons and Daughters at the Village.
Signed to Domino on the back of a
recommendation from Franz
Ferdinand, they have been eclipsed
somewhat by the inexplicable rise
of another signing to that label,
Arctic Monkeys. Still, Sons and
Daughters have an independence
about them that makes you feel that
they will always be about, as other
trends come and go. It is live where
Sons and Daughters really come
Deerhoof:
The Runners
Four
Cian Traynor
into their own, their ferocity on
stage matching the intensity of
their songs. So fierce are they live
in fact, that during a particular frenetic rendition of a song about
corpses in a bath tub, one fan
seemed to be so overcome by the
sentiments in the song that he
decided to act out his own little
‘murder ballad’ on me, by grabbing
laptop, then you are going to be
quite restricted in how you recreate
that live. Still, people used to level
the criticism at DJ’s that all they
did was play records, but the support act for Kieran Hebden’s gig at
the Temple Bar Music Centre, Kid
Koala, (possibly the most appropriately named act ever, because a) he
looks like a child and b) also looks
“Stephen Malkmus, Malko, S-Man, if you’re
reading, I can only apologise... I have nothing
to say that could ever justify not going to your
gig”
me by the neck and attempting to
throttle me. At least this is the only
explanation I have been able to
come up with so far.
One act though who isn’t
really suited to the live arena is
Four Tet. Admittedly, if you do create the bulk of your music from a
like a koala) showed that even this
can be approached in a genuinely
creative and inventive manner.
Because Four Tet is great, I would
like to tell you that he came on
stage accompanied by a 70 piece
orchestra who carefully recreated
every whistle and wind chime he
But what is that voice? A
daydreaming Asian teenage girl
plucked at random and placed in
front of an explosive rock band? Or
an overweight madman with a
falsetto that's gone past the point of
no return? The real answer is
bassist Satomi Matsuzaki and her
twisted English, daintily delivering
themes of espionage and magic in
what reads like Beat poetry:
Ryan
Adams:
29
Cian Traynor
Revive your fire. Now, now, now.
We have wolf minds.
Knock your door of the minds hard
to wake them up.
Bark to the moon loud. Shout,
shout, shout.
Make a wish come true.
Glare eternity.
I had to give this album quite a few
playbacks just to see if my gut
reaction wasn't simply over the top.
Quite simply, this is a brilliant,
dynamic, and insane listen. Now,
one could argue about what band
came first and who influenced who
'til the cows come home, but it
would be far more satisfying to try
and determine just what the hell
this is.
Like a crazed, lollypoptwirling devil with eyes like solar
eclipses and arms like slot machine
handles, “The Runners Four” has
what it takes to be the 21st century
equivalent to "Safe as Milk," given
half the chance. In terms of composition alone, Deerhoof's tenth
album (which is twice as long as
any of their previous efforts) has to
be admired as a work of invigorating vibrancy. Giving you the sense
that these tracks could work
extraordinarily well even as instrumentals, Chris Cohen and John
Dieterich's guitars hop scotch
together to take you somewhere
utterly fantastic.
Forming a seemingly
telepathic interplay with each
other, the end product makes for a
dazzling combination that is
strangely (and perhaps inexplicably) compelling; few releases this
Like a crazed, lollypop-twirling
devil
with eyes like solar
eclipses and arms
like slot machine handles, “The Runners
Four” has what it
takes to be the 21st
century equivalent to
"Safe as Milk."
year have excited me in the way
“The Runners Four” does. Not
only will it be guaranteed to bring
me back for repeated visits, but I
look forward to the process of
growing into it. To know that it was
recorded live only helps to astound
me further.
While releasing three new albums
in a year is quite a bold move,
Ryan Adams' track record in recent
years should mean his prolific output levels makes for a string of
welcome appearances in the
release dates listings. Returning
without backing band the Cardinals
in tow this time, Adams changes
his sound once again, parading a
different side to his diversity by
going for a largely more stripped
down, piano-based setup that flirts
with melancholia.
Starting matters off misleadingly, however, is the rhythm'n'blues rocker “29,” and
although its melody line is blatantly lifted from the Grateful Dead's
"Truckin'," Adams packs it with
verve, making it enough of an
effective outing to let him away
with any accusations of pilfering.
However, on the eight-minute-long
"Strawberry Wine," it seems that
the borrowing of elements isn't
going to be isolated to the title
has recorded, but that would be
lying; it was just him. And a laptop.
One other point to note is that his
eyes were freakishly scary.
So that was 2005, or a
very small portion of it. However,
there were others that I just didn’t
go to, out of sheer laziness. It is too
people that I missed that I now turn
to. Stephen Malkmus, Malko, SMan, if you’re reading, I can only
apologise. I know you didn’t come
to Ireland this time but I was in
France at the same time as you
were in your tour, and yet I didn’t
go. I have nothing to say that could
ever justify not going. Also, Roots
Manuva, I don’t think I’ll ever be
able to rationally explain what the
hell I was at when you came to
Dublin; please come back. I promise I will be there.
track, as here and elsewhere there
are a number of vocal bends adopted directly from Ray Davies (you
may also recognize the guitar slide
on "The Sadness").
Regardless, while perhaps being a little overdrawn, its
storytelling narrative begins a nice
run of refined yet sparse quality,
brandishing highlights in the form
of the starkly beautiful "Night
Birds" - which has all the flavor of
a modern jazz singer's composition
- and the laid back country breeze
of "Carolina Rain."
Though clocking up to a
total of 49 minutes, the nine tracks
that make up “29” feels decidedly
shorter than that, and chiefly
responsible for such an impression
is the choice to settle for a lightlyplayed piano and an occasional
touch of strings on the majority of
arrangements. Even the over-thetop "The Sadness" (which sounds
like it considers itself to be some
kind of Tex-Mex epic) attempts in
vain to break up the run of sameness, but just sounds silly and out
of place; and so by the time we
reach "Voices," it's become a little
too late to distinguish what's on
offer from the album's earlier
incarnations.
Ultimately, Adams' third
effort of the year may be one just
for the hardcore collective, but if
anything, by undertaking outfits
that others would automatically
sound pretentious in other singers’hands, 29 underlines the notion
that he is cut from a very traditional cloth of American songwriters one that seems ever closer to
extinction.
14
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Food & Drink Editor: Rosie Gogan-Keogh
Trinity News
FOOD & DRINK
The Dublin Food
Experience
Conspicuous
Consumption
…With Claudia
Braün
Rosie Gogan-Keogh visits La Taverna Di Bacco
La Taverna Di Bacco,
26 Lower Ormond
Quay,
Dublin 1.
Ph. (01) 8741000
Just before Christmas I moved out
of home for the first time. And in
with my boyfriend. The latter fact I
omitted to tell my mother – afraid
of her reaction and disapproval and
the fear that she might try and stop
me. When I eventually told her
several weeks later, long enough
for me to think I was now out of
her grasp. How could she be angry,
I was the happiest she had ever
seen me, the only thing she was
upset about was the fact I had lied.
This was one of those cringe worthy moments in life where you can
pinpoint the moment you left
behind a certain moment of childhood and made me determined to
never lie again.
Mr. Mick Wallace has a
lot to learn about lying. He convinced himself that he is the
utmost Italian connoisseur and has
made the ultimate statement of this
on Suffolk Quay.The big-time
builder, part of the group of Celtic
Tiger successes, has a now-famed,
long time love of Italy. The entire
of Dublin now knows this due to
his infamous street known as ‘that
new one off the quays’ or in some
circles ‘Wallace Way’.
For those of you who
have not yet been inspired by
intrigue to see where the other side
of the Millennium Bridge leads to,
it is the Northside’s latest bid to
rival Temple bar, since the failed
attempt of Smithfield. But
Smithfield’s problem was that no
matter how many Luas lines went
by it would never be central. For
this reason Wallace’s tactful gap
between two buildings has been a
great success.
Wallace obviously doesn’t need the money that this street
must earn; this is simply his own
playground where he gets to play
out his personal fantasies. He can
usually be seen hanging out in the
wine-bar with his other Caterpillar
clad builder mates.
There are several restau-
rants, a food shop and delicatessen
and the much-loved Enoteca Della
Langhe wine-bar. This is certainly
not the kind of place one might
come searching for a cheap pint. In
fact there isn’t a beer in sight. And
a good thing too as the enormous
selection of Italian-sourced wine is
the one thing Wallace has managed
to get right. That, and the plates of
the most important hurdle. Food
has failed him, or perhaps he has
failed food.
Yet he tries so hard. The
impassioned speech at the beginning of the menu, really does build
one up for amazing things to come.
We are told that this restaurant
exists because of a genuine love of
the wonders of real traditional
I have never sent a dish back. But in my new
‘honesty is the only policy’ steadfast determination, I decided I would not endure the tasteless sticky balls of dough, politely referred to
as Gnocchi”
Crostini and Antipasti that you can
order along with it. But, then
again, how hard is it to get expertly sourced wine and slices of
bread, meat and cheese wrong.
Until recently I had only
been to Enoteca and perused
around the Deli. For this reason I
held Wallace’s Way with a modicum of respect. It was something
different, offbeat classy without
being pretentious. However , since
my visit to La Taverna I have
realised that Wallace has fallen at
Italian food.
At long last, we have an
Italian restaurant, which is by no
means a slap-dash Spaghetti
Bolognese and Margarita pizza
affair, I thought. The menu is
impressive; well it appears so, with
as little English as possible. It
changes every three weeks but
generally sticks to a selection of
one pasta dish, one meat, one fish
etc. You get the picture.
My starter of Bruschetta
was basic -can’t possibly screw
up- grilled bread, tomato, basil and
olive oil. Simple but tasty in its
own right. The real let down lay in
the main courses. I have never sent
a dish back. But in my new ‘honesty is the only policy’ steadfast
determination, I decided I would
not endure the tasteless sticky balls
of dough, politely referred to as
Gnocchi. Slightly sickened by this
experience, I could not face any
more food, so stuck to the wine
instead. The other mains didn’t
fare much better with incredibly
dry venison and a pasta dish with a
name three Italian sentences long,
which tasted more like gone off
Knor Pasta Funghe.
It is important
to remember that La Taverna is at
the lower end of the scale in the
Wallace price range. So slightly
more in line with a student budget.
With starters ranging from E6 to
E9 and main courses from E10 to
E15. But this is no excuse. It only
gives us the vague hope that
Wallace has achieved his dream of
authentic Italian food in one of his
more upmarket restaurants.
It may come as a surprise to you,
dear readers, to learn that nighttime can be a lonely time in
Women’s Prison. Of course, a person such as I may appear to be elevated far above the grasp of an
emotion so pedestrain as loneliness, yet let it not be forgotten that
though I am a woman of exception,
I am still a woman – and my hard
bunk (in the cell I share with an
arsonist known popularly as Big
Sharon) can indeed be a lonely
place. Oftentimes, I clasp my pillow tightly to my firm bosom and
think back upon the pleasures of
romance…
All successful courtships
begin with a successful first meal.
For example, my most recent husband, the country’s foremost bookmaker Mr. Browne, treated me to a
delicious gorilla paté at our first
dinner engagement – one which he
had had specially flown in for the
occasion. This I took to be a good
sign, and immediately set about
devising the menu for our wedding
reception. On the other hand,
young ladies would be well
advised to vacate a dinner engagement with maximum haste should
their would-be beau show the sheer
vulgarity to order from the menu,
suggest ‘splitting the bill’ or, for
that matter, suggest a dinner date in
an establishment in which he is not
at the very least the primary shareholder. If a man cannot offer culinary luxury, my female readers
may rest assured that this paucity
will continue into other areas.
Of course, once one
SEARCH FOR THE HOLY GRAIL
acquires a suitable mate, the culinary arts may – from time to time –
need to be called upon to stoke the
flames of Eros. This is nothing of
which to be ashamed. Allow me to
elucidate. Following an extended
business trip to Thailand, Mr.
Browne returned suffering from
such extreme – and mysterious –
exhaustion that the pleasures of the
flesh seemed utterly beyond him.
Summoning all my digity, I
arranged a summit with Chef to
which I arrived fully composed and
with confidentiality agreement in
hand. Chef – who had gone
through upwards of two dozen
scullery maids since arriving just
three months earlier – showed perfect sensitivity to the conundrum in
which I found myself.
Eschewing the conventional aphrodisiacs of which I am
sure you are aware (oysters, pome-
“The bar must be thinly
sliced in the manner of
an extremely small loaf
of bread, and the slices
placed in a perfect pentacle upon an untarnished silver platter.
This platter must then
be carried by the Lover
to the Beloved, the slices
placed communion-like
upon the tongue of the
Beloved as he sleeps and
there allowed, one-byone, to dissolve.”
granites, things of that nature), he
swore me to the highest level of
secrecy before disclosing his recipe
for ardour. What was revealed
caused my heart to miss seveal
beats. Chef told me of a mysterious ingot of food – known to the
great unwashed as a ‘Snickersbar’
– which, when prepared in a certain
way, was known to be an aphrodisiac of positively volcanic potency.
The ‘Snickersbar’ must
first be skinned of its plastic
sheath, in much the same way as a
fresh eel must be turned, wriggling,
out of its skin. A ‘Snickersbar’
does not wriggle or writhe, however, but rather sits upon the plate,
slablike and inert – awaiting the
preparatory touch which will transform it from mere proletarian
stuffage into a substance of untold
power. The bar must be thinly
sliced in the manner of an extremely small loaf of bread, and the
slices placed in a perfect pentacle
upon an untarnished silver platter.
This platter must then be carried by
the Lover to the Beloved, the slices
placed communion-like upon the
tongue of the Beloved as he sleeps
and there allowed, one-by-one, to
dissolve.
I need not go into details
of the instantaneous and transformative effect of this ritual upon
Mr. Browne. All I will say is that
by the following weekend I lay,
prone, upon the chaise longue in
such a state of ravishment that even
a King Size Snickersbar crammed
whole into my gaping mouth by a
phalanx of Bavarian stormtroopers
could not have stirred me to further
activities. As I lay there, insensate,
a thought occurred to me which I
often summon now to fortify
myself against the intellectual and
gastronomic starvation I undergo
here: It is often the lack of a pleasure which makes the moment of its
acquisition all the more thrilling.
As I choke back my grey gruel and
ward off the attentions of Big
Sharon, I think of the carnal and
alimentary pleasures that await my
release, and am reminded that
while absence may not make the
heart grow fonder, it certainly
serves to bring the appetite to a
furious boil.
NEXT TIME: A conundrum for
Claudia.
[Claudia Braün is in conversation
with David Turpin.]
Various
You Decide
The essence of this column is cheap. But a cheap pint doesn’t have to mean a bad pint. It is with this in mind that we
are including a section on drinking on the bright side of three euro. If you are taste sensitive then turn away now. The
sunny side of three euro per pint comes at a cost, the bar maids with hoof dentures, the funeral time music and the
refreshing taste of anti-design. This is not Dawson Street country.
This is the first year I
have successfully managed to
make it to mid-January without
breaking any of my New Year’s
resolutions. Thankfully, however,
this does not mean that I have been
surviving on a diet of raw eggs and
pumpkin seeds. Last year as the
clock struck 12, amongst the madness of Hospital’s Twenty Hands at
the Music Centre, I took that
inward look and instead of deciding on a gung-ho rebuttal of my
physical state I resolved to tackle
that of my brain instead.
I am a fairly sane person,
as much so as the next person – so
my plan didn’t stretch as far as
checking myself into a mental hospital once I’d recovered from the
festivities of the night before. No, I
made up my mind to stop lying, to
others, but most importantly
myself. We all fib, there’s no point
in denying it. Hence I made no
attempt at drawing up a plan of six
“Goin’ down the Offo”
o’clock jogs and ten hours study a
day.
And so I have embarked
on this new year with a policy of
one hundred per cent honesty. It is
with some difficulty that I have
stretched it to writing this column.
When I found myself asking
friends where in town I could buy a
cheap pint I had to stop myself.
Surely I should take it as a sign that
I hadn’t actually been to that
“dodgy place on Frances Street.”
The fact of the matter is that when
considering a night out going
somewhere that I do not necessarily like simply to save a euro or two
is not my buzz. Nor, in retrospect,
is it the vast majority of people’s.
Let’s face it – you’re
broke, it’s Friday night, you’re
hardly going to say: ‘Well, I have a
tenner so I might as well go to
insert random oul lad pub here
where I can get three drinks instead
of two.’ Unless, you’re some kind
of neurotic straight-laced accountant you do what any other sane person would do and either buy some
cans, drink them before going out,
or perhaps a nagan to stick in your
back pocket and pour into a nice
“ Yo u ’ r e b r o k e , i t ’ s
Friday night, you’re
hardly going to say:
‘Well, I might as well
go to -insert random
oul lad pub herewhere I can get three
drinksinstead.of two.’”
glass of ice while in the toilets of
your favourite hip-happening club.
Fact? Come on we have
all been there. I for one refuse any
longer to be scandalously ripped
off by pubs anymore. Buying
booze in the off-licence is simply
the way to go.
Here is my guide to
drinking cheap in Dublin:
a) Nobody thinks this far in
advance but if you do Lidl and Aldi
are the way to go.
b) Centras etc. are that bit more
expensive but they do stay open
that bit later – often a quandary.
Their winning factor is location,
location, location and you are also
nearly always guaranteed to find
the cheapest wine.
c) Dunne’s on Georges Street don’t
stock beer in the fridge and getting
asked for ID by a fifteen year old
that claims they’re the manager
means they lose my vote.
d)Once it starts heating up again
we all know the Pav is the only
place you can drink your own drink
outside and get away with it.
e) Not that I’m advocating breaking the law – but if you happen to
be bringing your alcohol into a
premises – don’t try it if you see
lots of full nagans and coke bottles
on the ground around the bouncers.
Use your head – drink it first, or
pop around the corner and stuff it
down your jocks, and next time
invent a fail safe secret pocket to
fool even the most intelligent (perhaps least dumb is more fitting) of
doormen.
f) Finally -the most sensible of
points- if you find yourself completely broke and still pondering
how many cans you can get for
€8.17, perhaps its time to reconsider a) your alcoholism b) the locations you choose to pursue this disease and c) the people with which
you do so. Surprisingly enough
there are places and people in this
city where and who with you can
still manage to have sober fun!
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
FOOD & DRINK
Trinity News
This year I will ...
take over the world!
Harry Johnstone’s
Words
Of
Wine
Having trouble sticking to those New Year’s Resolutions? Hana Chelache takes us
through the fickle world of human resolve and tells us how to embark on a healthy
New Year.
Let me guess, on January the first
this year you were turning your
back on your couch potato existence, you were only going to eat
the type of food that is usually
found in pet shops, never drink
again, and fit an Olympian style
exercise programme around college. And you probably kept it up
for a few days, didn’t you? A
Buddhist monk would have winced
to see your new routine of rigorous
self-denial. And God weren’t you
feeling smug? So why now, as
2006 continues on, have you
become, like just about every other
person on the face of the planet
again?
Why are you flabby,
spotty, why don’t you have the sex
drive of a pre-menopausal rhino?
Well, and you find this hard to
accept, but it’s probably because
you’re a mere-mortal, not a supermodel or a movie star, and there’s
not much any of us can do to
change it. Look at yourself in the
mirror; it may not be a pretty sight
Do they really know the answers?
but its probably the most attractive
you’re ever going to be. The fact
that you nearly pass out walking up
the stairs?
Well the sad thing is
you’ll probably never be fitter. We
all have to accept that given the
sorry state we’re all in now then it’s
probably all down hill from here. A
lifetime of healthy eating probably
won’t make much of a difference.
At the end of your lifetime you’ll
probably look just like everyone
else does, old, not a ninety-year-old
Greek God.
But I personally don’t
mind. New Year’s resolutions in
my opinion are just part of the
downward spiral of self-hatred that
modern society has created for us.
Just days after Christmas people
who make their money off you by
telling you that you are fat start to
squeeze every penny they can out
of you with numerous work out
videos and diet books, (well they
might be right, but there’s no need
to capitalise on it).
This process began early
this year; to my horror the good
people at Richard and Judy, one of
my favourite TV programmes, presented us this year with their
“amazing drop a dress size”
scheme in which they ask three
women with who weren’t unattractive or endangering their health in a
major way but qualified for this
scheme because they had body
shapes that a hundred years ago
would have probably passed as
normal, especially after childbirth,
were submitted to a three week
regime that looked like torture, to
be publicly shamed on national tel-
evision if they can’t fit into a dress
that was too small at the beginning.
Well they all managed to pull it off,
(or run to the shops and buy a bigger dress), but the result was horrible.
Here
was
Richard
Madely, hardly a pin up himself,
asking the three contestants if
they’d be eating an alternative
Christmas dinner to the rest of their
families or just having a smaller
portion, I think I’d rather look at a
screen full of fat women. Can you
imagine anything more offensive,
or unnerving, then being a member
of those women’s families on
Christmas day? In this context eating what you’re meant to eat during
the festive period would suddenly
become a great big sign around
your neck saying, “I am a greedy
and self indulgent fat bastard who
deserves to have a heart attack or a
stroke as my only present this
year.” Definitely not looking forward to that pleasant day.
This isn’t me trying to
advocate damaging your body by
eating unhealthy food. Neither am I
having a cheap crack at the media
being used as a tool to educate people and bring about some real
change, 2005 for me will always be
the year when the media actually
made a visible change for the better
with Jamie Oliver’s campaign to
get healthier meals served in
British schools. But at the same
time there has to be a balance, I’m
sure during the 1940s when people
were apparently never healthier
bookshops were full of proper
books that actually advanced your
brain, not full of stuff written by
people who want us to eat nothing
but pure protein. And Special K
I’m sorry but you are a product
packed with sugar, salt and artificial sweeteners. Any woman that
decides she is going to eat nothing
but you for a whole month to fit
into a pair of jeans she bought
when she is twelve is either pig
ignorant, or a victim of her own
vanity.
So what are we going to
do then? We have the very real
threat of cancer, heart disease and
diabetes on the one hand, but on the
other hand evil thin people making
money from our vulnerability bombard us. There are books out there
that do genuinely want to make you
healthier, but if you can’t follow
one of these impossible schemes
don’t worry. I think the reason most
people don’t stick to these things
that “will change your life” is probably the same reason that not a lot
of people become Buddhist monks.
We simply don’t want to, what we
eat is usually determined by what
we enjoy, we usually don’t exercise
because we don’t enjoy it. My suggestion is not that you make up
some resolutions you know that
you can keep, which doesn’t mean
you have to actually “give up” anything or suffer, but where you’ll be
able to see the rewards for yourself.
I was going to try and come up with
ten, but not being a qualified nutritionist, or a Greek Goddess myself
you’ll have to be satisfied with
eight, but I think they’re pretty pain
free. Who knows, you might even
enjoy trying them out.
Hana’s New Year’s Eating Tips
1. Buy food you’re actually going
to eat. I always have to throw food
away and it is such a waste. If you
have a blender make a soup or a
smoothie out of all the stuff that’s
left over before it goes funny. This
is a great way of including the stuff
you can’t bear, because its taste
will be hidden by just about everything.
2. Be inventive with fruit and vegetables. To quote everyone’s
favourite
housewife
Marge
Simpson “fruit is nature’s candy”.
If it’s something different then it’s
probably good for you and also satisfying. Especially with vegetables, these things are colour coordinated for a reason; a full spectrum of colours means a full spectrum of vitamins, even a baby
could work this one out. We are
meant to enjoy eating these things,
I know I don’t want to die not
knowing what a paw-paw is like,
and you don’t just get vitamin C
from oranges you know, kiwis and
tomatoes are also full of the stuff.
A good start is to eat two portions
of vegetables with every evening
meal, and don’t overcook them
either or you loose half the nutrients and taste. What ever you do
don’t take those bloody vitamin
pills instead. First of all they are
ridiculously expensive, if you want
to cover everything you need in
your diet you’ll be spending three
digit figures. Secondly what you
get naturally is what’s best for you
and thirdly, how are you meant to
erm … dispose of your waste, if
you don’t have a bit of roughage.
3. Put raisins on your breakfast
cereal (or museli if you’re smug).
They make everything chewier,
sweeter and its all perfectly natural, ah bliss.
4. Make your own packed lunch to
bring into college so at the end of
the week you can afford to treat
yourself to lunch at a place you
really enjoy. I probably need to
start doing this as well because
most of my money last year went
on dodgy sandwiches from chain
stores. It can be kind of puzzling
knowing what to put in your sandwiches, if you have anything spare
lying around then my advice is
bung it in, including salad. I also
15
find that hummus is really nice
alternative spread, although it
doesn’t go with everything. It’s
made from chickpeas and sesame
seed oil, so it’s for you and already
contains proteins, plus its one of
my favourite foods. Plain Greek
yoghurt is also good mixed in with
tuna fish as an alternative to mayonnaise, and if you use tuna that
has been preserved in fresh water,
with no added salt or oil then the
only other good deed you need to
do that day is polish your own
halo, you smug little angel.
5. Enjoy cooking and enjoy eating,
that’s what Dr Atkins probably
won’t tell you to do. Cook with flat
mates and be creative so it doesn’t
feel like a chore. And also take
some time out from all this worrying to treat yourself. So what if you
enjoy eating chocolate cake? Are
you really a bad person who’ll go
to hell for having a fry up on a
Sunday morning or drinking on a
Saturday night? Don’t go over
board, but if you’re intelligent
enough to be able to judge a
healthy diet then you deserve to
rewards yourself for it. Oh, and
Escape From
The Butter y...
stop feeling so guilty all the time.
6. Eat fish at least once a week, but
I’m not talking about some poncey
cod, I’m talking about oily fish like
salmon, trout, monkfish, and
mackerel. You can get all of these a
lot cheaper if you go to a local fishmonger, even though they do tend
keep quite student unfriendly
hours. These things contain that
stuff called omega 3, I’m not quite
sure what it exactly does but its
great. I was a vegetarian for two
years, and by the end of those two
years so much of my hair had broken off that it was half its previous
thickness. I started eating fish
again and this problem just went
away, so I must be doing something right. Also when you cook it
put a splash of olive oil, as much
lemon juice as you can squeeze
out, herbs and halved cherry tomatoes, wrap it up in tin foil and bung
it in the oven for twenty five minutes so you also have a sauce to put
on your rice, pasta or whatever. If
you’re a vegetarian then linseeds
also have lots of omega 3, and you
don’t need to cook them, so you
probably win.
7. Eat pulses, (by that I mean
beans); they are a lot cheaper than
meat and higher in protein, so
there. You can use them to make all
kinds of things as well, sauces,
soups, burgers, basically anything
you use meat in. Tofu can also be
really nice as if you cook it
Japanese style. Try frying some
tofu and vegetables in a little bit of
olive oil, then add water with a
couple of spoons of miso in it (this
soy bean thing you can get in oriental food markets, its very good
for you but be warned, its disgusting and nutritionally useless unless
its fresh), noodles and if you want
stir in an egg and watch it cook. It’s
basically Wagamama’s in your
own home in about ten minutes,
perfect.
8. I really don’t want to include
this one but I’m going to have to.
Find a form of exercise you enjoy
and do it regularly. If you succeed
in doing this, please tell me to get
off my bum and join you.
Another festive season over. Us
Christians celebrating the birth of
our saviour then the start of
another year by gorging ourselves
stupid and keeping those chubby
cheeks ruddy for the best part of
a week (or three) by imbibing an
array of alcohols: wine, port,
brandy, champagne, whiskey,
stouts and beers in all shapes and
forms. Ah, the time for taking is
over, and our bellies and livers
and pockets have paid the price.
Well, the New Year
brings plenty of imaginings, forward-thinking and Big Talk from
the visionaries among us. I
would recommend looking no
further than The Corkscrew on
Chatham Street, for a re-stocking
world battle for wine sales.
The west coast Palandri
Estate 2001, was a well-reputed
Shiraz, reduced from €14.95 to
€11 yet still lacking value.
Fragrancing strawberry and cherry, this big, powerful wine
seemed simply that. Big is not
always better, and all its taste
could garner from our panel
was… “Pepper“, and little more.
David O ‘Leary, the
former chief wine maker at
Harveys and twice international
winemaker of the year, has crafted a clever Cabernet
Sauvignon/Shiraz whose form
and taste will appeal very much
to the newer generation of winos.
Complete with screw top and
of the cellar, or perhaps an
assuaging of one’s newly found
thirst for wine. The January Sale
certainly applies here, so too do
some choice wines from the New
World.
As Chilean wines surf
the wave of global commercial
popularity, Dublin stockists continue to offload such accessible,
value-driven produce by the
shipload to happy customers.
Tabali 2002, a Merlot from vina
san pedro, was another case in
point. Grown from vines in the
Lamari Valley, which is now
famous for its heat, its height and
the fact that this terrain of quality
vineyards was only discovered 10
years ago. The nose offered lots
of bouncy fruits; both tropical
and blackcurrants-and-cream at
the same time. The wine was
super - creamy, rich, dry, with
nice balance - and all this for a
reduced price of €9.95. It exemplified a Chilean under €10.
What followed were
two Australians, one from the
usual stable for big, robust reds,
and another grown in the west.
Brand marketing in Australia and
the rest of the New World, like
wine-based technology, is miles
ahead of the French, who seem to
retreat further and further into the
Medoc, when it comes to the
funky artwork label, the wine
exudes a modern feel. Its bright
and brash and for tasters, it’s big.
Southern Roo 2002, its called,
and represents one grape type of
a number of ‘Heath Wines’ from
different parts of the country.
The consortium was founded by
Alan Heath, the former racing
driver turned businessman. This
smelt of vanilla and saffron, but
tasted of berries and cream,
again, but was complemented by
hints of cherry and liquorish. At
14% it’ll guarantee enjoyment.
The Corkscrew has
kindly agreed to offer special
10% discounts on all wines for
TCD students, providing they can
show ID. This last wine,
Southern Roo, has been specially
reduced to us for €11.50.
It really is Great value
for the perfect example of a south
east Australian red. Go and try it,
if only to keep that liver on its
toes…
All wines are available
at The Corkscrew, Chatham
Street, Dublin 2.
The question lurks- where can you get a decent coffee in town after 9 o clock and not have to pay through the nose for it? In my misguided youth, the answer was
inevitably- Eddie Rockets. However, one cold wintery evening in 5th year, all that changed. Through unquestionable divine intervention, I happened upon Heavenly
Food Company.
Where? Temple Bar Square- next to the Hagen Daaz Café (my computer doesn’t acknowledge the existence of umlauts so I apologize to any German speakers
who are offended by the lack thereof).
How long? From Main Arch, down Dame St. and down by Central Bank, it takes about 5ish minutes.
Heavenly Food Company
with Ailbhe Malone
Staff?
Two foreign girls who serve with a smile and are generous with their free Chocolates.
Prices?
Coffee starts at about €1.75
Seating?
Herein lies the downside, all seating is outdoors. This is rather cosmopolitan European and whatnot in the summer, but not particularly fun in a cold Irish
January.
Unexpected Upside? Most cafés would be content serving one hot drink to perfection and leaving other beverages to chance. Not this place. Whether you go for the
beautiful hot chocolate, or as I call it on my grumpy days- ‘fat in a cup’ or their vanilla chai lattés, you won’t be disappointed.
Unexpected Downside? Whatever you do, DON’T TRY THE HOT DOGS. Sure, they may look tempting but after 3 bites your stomach begins to rebel in a vengeful
manner…..
Finally……. If you get a seat at the right time of the evening on a Saturday night, that funny man who wears leopardskin and limbos under firey poles performs
right beneath your nose.
16
Travel Editor: Alix O’Neill
Tuesday January 24, 2006
Trinity News
TRAVEL
Aussie Rules- The Backpacker’s
Guide to Down Under
Ruth Patten on surf and skydiving on the Bruce Highway
The most trampled of all the beaten tracks in the great island that is
Australia is the Sydney to Cairns
route. It takes you up the east coast
and through where the majority of
the population calls their home. I
was lucky to find my way there last
Summer and I would advise everyone to beg, borrow, steal or stowaway in order to get there. Most
people are lucky enough to have up
to a year to get to know the place
but I only had seven weeks; seven
frantic, exhausting, exhilarating,
fabulous weeks of endless roads
and the coast almost constantly to
my right. Starting in the surprisingly familiar city of Sydney provided
a few introductions to Oz. I sampled the obvious destinations; the
aquarium (fantastic), the opera
house (bigger than you expect) and
the fantastic climb up to the top of
the the Sydney Harbour Bridge
(incredible, especially at night,
what a view!) There was almost
too much to talk about but visits to
Manly, Bondi and the awe inspiring Blue Mountains are mandatory,
although perhaps not including the
four hour bush-walk that left me
practically asthmatic for the first
time in my life!
Being on my own, or
what is known as “an Independent
Traveller” (sounds much more
posh than backpacker) I chose to
travel with a company called “Oz
Experience”. Their manic drivers
ferried us independent travellers
(otherwise known as those of us
with no friends) up the coast. Quite
a bit more expensive than the mundane Greyhound service but well
worth it for the extras alone –such
as getting into theme parks after
closing, surfing in tiny coastal
towns and a night in a rustic cattle
station in the outback. The
minibuses left every morning and
allowed me to meet a great many
people along the way who were in
exactly the same position as me.
That is just as lost, solitary and
utterly liberated. Up early we left
Sydney for a three day surf camp
where I finally came face to face
with my ultimate fear: the sea. Yes,
I am that pathetic but having seen
‘Jaws’ at the age of five I have
been unable to go any deeper than
paddling ever since. For the first
hour I was swearing like a trooper
ever (the Amsterdam of Australia),
it is more than bizarre when the old
lady in the bookshop offers to sell
you marijuana. Then Passing into
Queensland to the beautiful Gold
Coast, also known as Surfers’
Paradise, for obvious reasons. It is
very commercialised, filled with
what is known as ‘Australiana’
–sort of the equivalent of the green
leprechaun hats you see in Temple
Bar, but miles and miles of beaches and excellent surf. Up the road
is Brisbane (BrisVegas!), where
“I finally decided to take the plunge; a 14,000
feet parachute jump with a 60 second freefall
awaited me and Brett, my instructor, who
inspired me with confidence by having the
Batman symbol emblazzoned on his jumpsuit”
at every failed attempt (which, if
you have ever been surfing, you
will know are many!) but soon I
was laughing at the madness of it
all with the others and, shock, actually enjoying myself. By the second day I was even able to
stand…for about three seconds.
On up the coast to Byron
Bay, possibly the most fabulous
town in Australia, and that is saying a great deal. Staying there long
enough to get my diving passport,
nearly drowning when my gear
decided to float away while twelve
metres underwater and sampling
the eclectic mix of hippy living and
the madness of the backpacker
Mecca club “Cheeky Monkey’s”, I
was on my way again. We passed
Nimbin, a small town that was
taken over by hippies in the 70’s
for an Aquarius festival and then
changed irrevocably when they
refused to leave; the craziest town
they created a beach in the city
centre (why not?) and is surrounded by a suburbia filled with massive theme parks.
From Brisbane I went north again
to the small town of Mooloolaba
just beside Steve Irwin’s famous
Australia Zoo. Enthusiastic and
more hands on than any other zoo I
have ever been to, this place is
worth a visit for his custom-made
majority of my time was spent
washing everything I owned and
finding antihistamines for an
unfortunate reaction to spider bites.
From here, (I told you this was
whirlwind!) we passed though
Rainbow beach, Hervey Bay (with
access to Frasier Island), Agnes
Waters –where I continued my
lucky streak with by crashing my
scooter- a night in a working cattle
station in Kroombit and up to
Selena for a game of lawn bowls.
Whew!
All of this was done double quick so that I could spend
some time in Airlie beach, or more
specifically in a racing boat called
the Condor sailing around the
Whitsunday Islands. I cannot fully
express how amazing it is to be
hanging on to the deck of the
Condor as she sails on her side
while humpback whales sing to
you and the sun and wind beat at
you in equal measure. I was lucky
at this point to find people on this
trip who were to travel with me up
the coast and we travelled through
to Magnetic Island. This is a more
exclusive hotspot with sunset
beach parties and sea kayaking in
the early morning before moving
on to Mission Beach, a really quiet
and mental town where every sec-
“I cannot fully express how amazing it is to
be hanging on to the deck of a racing boat as
she sails on her side while humpback whales
sing to you and the sun and wind beat at you
in equal measure”
Crocosseum alone! More famous
for backpackers is the bigger town
of Noosa up the coast where I
unfortunately discovered spiders
had infested my clothes and the
ond person is a mildly abusive skydiver. Home of the famous ‘Jump
the Beach’ skydive, this town (or
really just the hostel with a club
attached in a sprawling neighbour-
hood) is not for the fainthearted.
On the way to Cairns was a
crocdile farm –while it was never
really in doubt, I will still NEVER
be buying crocodile skin anythingwhere I fell in love with a python
called Louisa, passing Millaa
Millaa Falls and the prerequisite
Bungy centre (Minjin!) before
reaching the city of Cairns. At this
point I was highly tempted to
change my flights and stay in
Australia forever (or at least until
the visa ran out) but we compromised and headed further north to
Port Douglas and exploring the
Great Barrier Reef off the coast of
Cape Tribulation. Glorious! In the
days before my flight out of Cairns
I huffed and puffed and finally
decided to take the plunge; a
14,000 feet parachute jump with a
60 second freefall awaited me and
Brett, my instructor who inspired
confidence by having the Batman
symbol emblazzened on his jump-
suit. And so it was home on a very
big high from my travels in Oz. A
place I left with a burning desire to
return and do it all again as well as
all the stuff I could not do with the
time limitation. In fact, in order to
fulfil this ambition I am willing to
take sponsorship, donations, loans
you don’t expect to get repayed
anytime soon, anything …please?!
Galapagos: Worth Discovering
(That’s the Theory Anyway...)
Ayson Mc Evoy cruises the isles of Darwin’s dreams
Galapagos Islands fact file:
- The Galapagos are a group of volcanically formed islands almost
1,000km off the coast of Ecuador.
- They were declared a World heritage site in 1975.
- There are two options when it
comes to visiting the islands; to
stay in hotel accommodation
(which is only available on the
most populous island, Santa Cruz,
the unofficial capital of the archi-
pelago) and visit the surrounding
islands by day; or to cruise the
islands, travelling by night and
exploring by day.
- The biological isolation of the
islands, combined with their volcanic formation and variety of
warm and cold currents have led to
a truly astounding array of habitats
and species. Each island even has
its own unique set of species, due
to both isolation by the sea (most
islands are, on average, four hours
from one another by boat) and variations in island age and topography
e.g. some taller islands have humid
zones in the highlands which support different species of plants and
animals.
- Half of all bird species, a third of
all plants and all reptiles on the
islands are endemic and exist
nowhere else on earth!!
- Needless to say, tourist numbers
are restricted and tourists can only
see designated visitor sites in the
national park courtesy of a trained
guide, and, to reduce soil erosion
can only travel via delineated
paths.
- There’s an Irish connection to the
islands too… (There always is!).
The first permanent resident on
Floreana island was an Irish sailor
named Patrick Watkins, who
washed up there in the early 1800s,
and, racial stereotyping has it that
he survived by growing vegetables
to trade with whalers for alcohol.
- It’s amazing that I’ve gotten this
far and still haven’t mentioned the
most famous visitor to the islands,
Charles Darwin. He visited the
Now that you have an
idea of what the islands are all
about, I’ll get down to what I got
up to there.
I remember clearly the
day that I booked and paid for my
trip to the Galapagos. I went
through
an
agency
called
‘Unforgettable Expeditions’. The
hope of such an expedition began
to fade during my journey to the
main island of Santa Cruz, when I
remembered that I have a tendency
towards seasickness. And so, I
spent the first two hours on the
waters surrounding the islands with
my head and neck hanging off the
side of a speedboat.
My friend Lizzy and I
were a bit confused when we ended
up spending the first night of our
‘cruise’ in a hotel. Our first day on
the islands, we visited the Charles
Darwin research centre (where I
got the little bits of info that I just
shared with you!). We moved on to
a tortoise sanctuary where the
workers collect tiny tortoise eggs,
incubate them, feed them and even-
“The first permanent resident on Floreana island
was an Irish sailor who survived by growing vegetables to trade with whalers for alcohol”
islands as part of his epic five year
voyage aboard the HMS Beagle.
He was struck by how well adapted
the animals were to their environment and how specific these adaptations were depending on the
island…the rest is natural history!
tually return them to the wild.
Here, also, resides the oldest living
creature, George, a giant tortoise
hundreds of years old. Many
attempts have been made to try to
get George to procreate (he is the
last of his particular species) but
even the most alluring female tortoise just doesn’t seem to get him
going and on the rare occasion that
they do, other problems arise for
the ancient George!
We spent that afternoon
swimming at what I am convinced
has to be the most secluded and
peaceful beach in the world. That
seaman didn’t have enough money
in the account for us to cash our
cheques. At this stage I had zoned
out and let the more vocal, and
burly, of the passengers fight the
cause. Half an hour later all the
cheques were cashed but as we left
the bank the feeling of satisfaction
but this was sadly tinged with dis-
“It was like walking through an untrammeled zoo
and the animals, having been free from predators
for millenia, either languidly accepted our presence, or came to investigate/welcome us”
is, apart from the iguanas, lizards,
lava gulls and herons lazing about
the rocks, and the sea turtles gliding through the waters. That night
was spent in a hotel on the same
island. At this stage some of the
other passengers began to get frustrated at there appearing to be no
boat, this being a cruise and all.
And I have to say, even though a
part of me was delighted that I had
escaped sleeping and eating on a
motorboat (the budget choice) for
the past two days, I was getting a
bit concerned too.
On the third day of the
island, at midday, all the passengers of the ‘Sara Dayuma’ ended up
in the local police office, demanding both an explanation and a
refund. Each of us made a formal
complaint, convincing the boat
owner that we were serious, and
then trooped down to the bank to
cash our refunds. Surprise of all
surprises when our ‘trustworthy’
appointment, and the realisation
that we had already missed two
days of touring the islands. It
turned out that there had been a
problem with the wood on the ship
(it was rotting) and no one thought
to take it on board until it had gotten out of control. The crew had
been working the past few days to
replace the planks and were waiting for an inspection by the island
sea officials in order to be allowed
sail again. This they kept from us
until the boat happened to be ready
and approved, that evening, on the
second day of our cruise.
We set off that evening
and arrived on Santa Fe Island just
in time to walk the island route as
the sun began its descent. A huge
colony of sea lions lounging on the
beach and grunting to one another
welcomed us onto the island (well,
I think it was a welcome grunt) and
some of the younger ones came to
investigate the new arrivals. The
sky turned various shades of
orange and purple until it was time
to board the boat again. Eventually
the lingering clouds faded from
view from the deck of the boat and
melted into the night sky. We began
sailing during the night to the next
island and it was a truly new experience to sleep in a tiny boat, miles
and miles from any mainland.
(Having said that, it’s not one that I
would repeat many times!)
We visited Isla Espanola
the following morning and followed a trail around the island
which displayed the majority of
what is found there. Huge groups
of marine iguanas lay in piles on
the rocks, literally on top of one
another, and albatrosses, tropic
birds, Galapagos doves, masked
boobies and blue footed boobies
circled overhead. It was like walking through an untrammelled zoo,
and the animals, having been free
from predators for millennia, either
languidly accepted our presence or
came to investigate/welcome us.
We snorkelled off the boat that
afternoon, among sea lions and
angel fish and a whole group of
others I couldn’t even begin to
imagine the names of.
My brief visit to the Galapagos
did turn out to be an ‘unforgettable’
experience, and I don’t think it
could have been otherwise, since
there is truly no other place on
earth like it.
Tuesday, January 24th 2006
Careers Editor: Myles Gutkin
Trinity News
17
CAREERS
Career Focus: Medicine
Zara Shubber explores the medical profession, what it has to offer and what it requires of
would-be Practitioners, with reference to Irish Tenor Dr. Ronan Tynan as an example.
The Job
A career in medicine is one of the
most honourable, highly demanded
and respected fields in the world. It
is noble, as it encompasses humanitarian service and is often both
rewarding and well paid. In the
medical field, there are a number of
areas in which you can specialize.
With hundreds of open doors available to the aspiring doctor, he or
she can rest assured that finding a
suitable career will not be difficult.
The options are many and include
positions in surgery, a GP clinic or
even psychiatry.
If academia is a person’s
calling, careers in teaching at a
medical school or as a medical
researcher are widely available.
Although the majority of working
doctors do so within a clinical or
hospital setting, many opportunities exist in many other sectors,
such as the ‘armed forces, corporations directing health and safety
programmes and insurance companies’.
If travel is your passion,
volunteer for one of the many
worldwide aid organizations
including Medecins sans Frontieres
and help fight the AIDS epidemic
or world hunger. Although you will
not be able to heal and help everyone in need, your career in medicine will always be rewarding and
fulfilling.
The downside is that the
path ahead will not be easy. It is
long, involving many years of
hard-work and dedication and most
often the financial expenses will
put a huge strain on the medical
student, with many graduating
from medical school with huge student loans and overdrafts.
It requires a lifetime of
learning and teaching, both in theory and in practice. With the rapid
acceleration of advancement in
both the technological and pharmaceutical industries, doctors must
continuously update their knowl-
edge and skills throughout their
career.
Whilst the overall working environment for doctors is
improving and their hours have
recently been cut, one should never
underestimate that a doctor as a
professional is required to work
relatively long and unsociable
community
Security
Medicine allows you a good standard of living with the comfortable
guarantee of a secure future.
Stimulation
Day to day experiences of a doctor
change daily so it is unlikely to
prove tedious or repetitive
“If travel is your passion, volunteer for one of
the many worldwide aid organizations including Medecins sans Frontieres and help fight
the AIDS epidemic or world hunger”
hours and will often have additional on-call duties.
They will be expected to
study for their speciality examinations throughout their working
career, which can be both demanding and time-consuming and may
have huge social impacts on not
only themselves but also on their
families.
One should however
consider the positive. As a doctor
progresses within his or her field,
the amount of labour will often
decrease. Much more time may be
spent training younger doctors,
researching a wide range of medical fields or on more specialized
cases in which experience, and
therefore clinical judgement, is
demanded.
A career in medicine encompasses
many characteristics that many
would consider as integral elements of a “dream career”.
Altruism
As a doctor you will have an opportunity to help others
Proactivity
Medicine is challenging and
dynamic and often demands splitsecond decisions based on a lifetime of experience.
Respect
Medicine is on of the world’s most
prestigious and honoured professions as you become an integral
and highly valued asset in your
Diversity
Disease and illness are rife
throughout the world. Whether it’s
a refugee camp in Africa or a clinic
here in Ireland, the title of doctor
grants you a visa to every region of
the world.
Flexibility
Many career options are available
both within and outside of the
health sector.
Getting there
The unfortunate reality is that even
armed with all the traits and
requirements needed to make it
through the undergraduate medical
degree, getting in can be testing in
itself. ‘
Each year thousands of
qualified applicants get turned
away for what amounts to supply
versus demand’. There are simply
more people wanting to pursue a
career in medicine than places in
medical schools allow for.
The minimum requirements of eligibility for the medical
programme at Trinity College
stands as having qualified from
school with 590 points or 4 grade
‘A’ A-levels, which should encompass a strong scientific background.
Another possible entry route is to
hold a previous degree in a related
scientific field.
Not all medical schools
have the same admission criteria
and so if you fail to be accepted at
a medical school in your country
and you are determined to be a doctor, your next option may be to look
elsewhere, possibly at “offshore”
medical schools.
An undergraduate medical programme is typically 5 years,
sometimes longer or shorter
depending on the individual school
or country. The first few years are
spent studying and grasping medical theory while the latter are spent
in clinical practice, developing
hands-on experience and gaining
essential skills that will aid in the
interaction with patients.
“A typical first year student at Trinity College spends an
average of 40 hours per week or
more within a structured environment during the academic year.”
These long and arduous hours and
the extensive reading volume can
leave you with time for little else.
On the plus side, with
perseverance, graduating “will lead
to a Bachelor in Medicine, a
Bachelor in Surgery and a Bachelor
in Obstetrics.” All doctors having
survived the “trauma” of medical
school must complete a period of
internship before they are regis-
cess in the medical profession are
disciplined, motivated, intelligent
and hard-working. They have a
desire to help the sick and needy as
well as a caring and sensitive manner in their interaction and reassurance of their patients and their families.
Medicine requires commitment and so your decision to
pursue this career should not be
taken lightly. You should ask yourself some questions and reassess
your reasons for wanting to
become a doctor.
If it is for financial reasons and job security, it is important to note that there are many
other careers where you can earn
much more money much more
quickly and with a lot less responsibility. If your motivation is an
altruistic one, you should also be
aware that medicine is not the only
way you can give help to others.
Some choose medicine
because of their excellent school
grades and are unsure of what else
to do. These people should consider that, although an excellent grasp
of the roots of basic science is necessary, being a doctor requires
“All doctors having survived the “trauma” of
medical school must complete a period of
internship before they are registered and recognized as independent doctors”
tered and recognized as independent doctors. This training is carried
out within a supervised clinical setting with a “steep learning curve”
that in fact continues throughout
their career.
“In terms of the training
period it can take up to 12 years to
progress within structured training
– from studying medicine at an
undergraduate level to being
appointed a hospital consultant. GP
status may be obtained in 9 years.”
Personal Qualities
much more than numbers, including excellent communication skills,
the ability to work within a team
and a highly adaptive mentality
towards your work.
Is Medicine your Calling?
Compassion and commitment
Advocacy and altruism
Leadership and logic
Love of learning
Integrity and curiosity
Negotiation with beaureaucracy
Goodness of heart
The Example
People who ultimately achieve suc-
Ronan Tynan, successful Medic, sportsman and singer
In his mid-thirties, Ronan Tynan is
an inspirational doctor. Born with
limb disabilities he still continued
with his passion for extreme sports.
This stopped when his legs were
amputated below the knee owing to
a car accident. Despite this set
back, within a year he was winning
gold medals at the Paralympics,
amassing a total of 18 gold medals
and 14 world records.
Tynan was the first disabled person ever admitted to The
National College of Physical
Education. He graduated with a
degree from Trinity College as a
medical doctor who specialized in
orthopaedic sports and injuries. In
addition to this outstanding biography, he is also renowned for his
beautiful tenor voice. He has won
numerous awards and regularly
appears in concert as an opera
singer.
This incredible specimen
of a human has been able to mix
and combine numerous careers. He
personifies determination and
strength, as well as the ability to
adapt himself to a wide-range of
roles within a society that could
have potentially made his disability
a hindrance.
Career Resources
www.nhscareers.nhs.uk
www.doctorsjob.com
www.msf.org
www.tcd.ie/Admissions
www.ronantynan.net
Towards an Ethical Career
Myles Gutkin looks at the world of ethical business practice, and how you and your fellow employees can help to create a more ethical business world
Security and ethics
An enormous part of our lives is
spent at work, making profit for our
employers in exchange for wages.
We should enjoy the work we do,
and be proud of it to avoid looking
back from retirement to realise that
our working lives were spent hurting others to fill the boss’s pockets.
“Don’t ever commit a
crime, or circumvent
national or international
laws for your employer.
Remember that under
Irish law, any contract for
illegal work is void”
However with expensive
real estate, insufficient social welfare and a high cost of living,
there’s no real choice for the Irish
resident but to be in a constant state
of employment. So it may seem
that an employee has little opportunity to dictate the terms of the
working environment for fear of
losing her/his meal ticket. But there
are some things you can do to
encourage moral business practice.
Do no harm
The easiest way to ensure that the
work you do is socially responsible
is to look into the company’s ethical record before agreeing to work
for them, or even before applying
for a job with them. You’ll need to
do some research before writing a
good cover letter for your CV, so
while you’re at it, read the website,
job description and mission statement.
What would you be
doing? Who would you be working
for? Would any one be hurt unjustly as a result of your work? Would
you feel ashamed to do what your
corporation does as a whole? Don’t
be a cog in the wheel unless you
approve of where the wheel is
going.
Make a small difference
There are small changes which a
few like-minded employees can
introduce to any working environment to make a positive contribution. Make suggestions about better
ethical practice at work, for example, include the more socially and
environmentally responsible suppliers as well as the cheapest prices
when obtaining quotes, and outline
their benefits objectively.
“The easiest way to ensure
that the work you do is
socially responsible is to
look into the company’s
ethical record before
agreeing to work for them”
working for charitable organisations, but it does mean working for
socially responsible employers.
Enterprise can be very good for a
community, but employees and
directors must ensure that they balance their need for profit with the
needs of the community in which it
operates.
“A business is fundamentally a structure which
exists to serve its consumer
base, and not its owners.
So if it manipulates consumers, and damages their
wider environment, it will
eventually alienate itself
from the source of all its
profit”
Providing a service or
product such as in education, social
work, accounting, healthcare,
building, and even marketing can
make a positive impact on the
world if done to serve consumers,
making a reasonable profit and
using resources responsibly.
Ethics and business
Request paper recycling
services in your office and a compost bin in the canteen, then commit to using them. Don’t ever commit a crime, or circumvent national
or international laws for your
employer. Remember that under
Irish law, any contract for illegal
work is void.
Make a big difference
There are many careers which benefit others. This doesn’t only mean
It often seems that nothing matters
in business, except the bottom line.
Boards of directors are employed
by shareholders who aren’t necessarily interested in the work the
company does, but want to take
home big dividends. So is the
answer to continuously cut costs
and increase profits? No. A business is fundamentally a structure
which exists to serve its consumer
base, and not its owners. So if it
manipulates consumers, and damages their wider environment, it
will eventually alienate itself from
the source of all its profit.
There is an increasing
market for ethically procured products and services, which will grow
with the resources of the population. Corporations who want share
prices to retain value, as well as
produce dividends need to follow
the overwhelming market trend
towards responsible practice.
“avoid supporting corporations which provide
goods and services using
methods we personally
deem immoral”
Take responsibility
With consumers becoming increasingly informed, the time of manipulating, overcharging and unethical
cost-cutting is nearing its end.
Discerning consumers want to
know that they aren’t supporting
immoral practice, as is evident in
the policies which our elected government has introduced to prevent
improper waste disposal, unfair
treatment of employees, unsafe
procedures and corporate monopolies.
As well as refusing to
elect a government that supports
immoral business practice, we also
need to avoid supporting corporations which provide goods and
services using methods we personally deem immoral. Given two similarly priced options of equal quality, we should prefer the product
which has hurt fewer people, wasted less resources and is marketed
without manipulating consumers.
By withholding profits from
Business doesn’t always have a warm smile but a cold heart
improper practitioners, we ensure
better standards in the future.
Relevant websites:
www.corporatewatch.org
www.oasis.gov.ie
www.entemp.ie
www.sgr.org.uk
18
SU & Societies Editor: Enda Hargaden
Tuesday January 24, 2006
Trinity News
SU & SOCIETIES
Societies: who got what?
With over ninety operational student societies in Trinity, the Central
Societies Committee (CSC) have increased the issued grants to over
€175,000 this year. Enda Hargaden reports where it went and dispels the
myth that membership plays a major role in deciding grant allocation.
Trinity’s five biggest societies have
almost 11,500 members between
them this year. This is a significant
increase in membership from last
year, with the top five accounting
for just over 10,300 in 2004/05.
The biggest society this year is St.
Vincent De Paul, and with well
over 4,000 members it is 125 times
bigger than the smallest society to
submit a grant application, the
Socialist Workers’ party – but SVP
are themselves down from nearly
5,000 members last year.
Second in the list, and
the largest society that is not applicable to exempt membership fees,
is the University Philosophical
Society. However some societies
we contacted resent their quoted
membership figure of 3,697, as it
includes ‘Gold Card’ members
from previous years. The Phil are
the only society to allow membership for more than one academic
year because of a clause in their
Constitution.
Exclusive to the Trinity
News, the figures show the CSC
have capped societal spending this
year at over €175,000 this year, a
substantial increase from last year.
This equates to over €6,500 per
week of term.
Each society has to make
an application detailing exactly
what they’ll need money for to
operate for the year, and a decision
is made on this by the Executive
Committee of the CSC. The money
to fund this comes from the registration fee that we all pay - however reluctantly - at the beginning of
each academic year. This is then
divided up by the capitated bodies
of the university: the Students’
Union, The Graduate Students’
Union, Publications, sports body
DUCAC, and the CSC.
In the run-up to
Freshers’ Week heads of societies
often decide to offer a low mem-
bership fee to societies in an
attempt to attract new members,
usually presuming that the
increased membership figures will
be reflected by an increased grant
by
the
Central
Societies
Committee (CSC). These figures
clearly dismiss this claim, with no
clear relationship between membership and grant cap.
Such statistical analysis
of the grant allocations by the CSC
has never been published before,
and confirm their commitment to
base grants releases on activity and
need rather than on the basis of
membership. The figures show that
low-cost societies receive lower
amounts – in Yoga’s case only 71c
per member – while very active
and high-cost societies while
Orchestral’s per capita grant fell
just short of €40.
There appears, as the
CSC claim, to be a strong relationship between last year’s performance and this year’s grant allocation. The award-winning Paintball
society received an additional
67%, while the Phil’s success of
last year is reflected by a €1300
increase in their basic grant. This
contrasts to Food & Drink sustained a 25% drop in theirs to
€1500, while Microbiology’s
grant plummeted from €1500 to
€600. It should be noted that allocations under the Special category
in submissions is excluded from
the figures, as these are taken on a
case by case basis and represent
unique once-off expenditures by
societies. It should also be noted
that the membership figures quoted
are those submitted by the societies
at the time of grant application.
There are also a number
of societies that, whilst still officially recognised and considered
active, have not registered either
membership figures, elected a
committee, or submitted a grant
application. It is expected that
these societies, such as Brain
Research,
Racing,
Karting,
Environmental and Astonomy and
Space will be soon de-recognised.
All of these societies are excluded
from the list, as are the societies of
sister colleges CICE and Froebel.
The CSC’s Term General Meeting
will be held on January 31st.
Society
Membership
Grant, €
Per Member,€
Society
Membership
Grant, €
Per Member, €
Afro Caribbean
AIESEC
Amnesty Int’l
Anarchist
Archaeological
Biochemical
Biological
Capoeira
Caledonian
Card & Bridge
Chapel Choir
Chess
Chinese Students
Choral
Christian Union
Classical
Comedy
Computer Science
Cumann Gaelach
Dance
Dental
Digital Arts
DUBES
DUPSA
DURNS
Early Irish
ELSA
Entrepreneurial
Europa
Fianna Fáil
Film-makers
Fine Gael
FLAC
Food & Drink
Gamers
Genetical
Geographical
Green
Historical
History
Internet
Japanese
Jazz
229
80
312
53
65
159
500
85
109
450
187
86
90
153
189
78
154
141
554
489
92
126
934
252
379
74
123
150
170
154
229
191
224
555
208
110
186
174
1852
167
500
30
375
1800
1400
1200
450
2000
3200
2500
900
1200
1500
4100
1300
500
4600
3500
1400
450
1200
3000
2800
1800
600
1200
500
1000
500
800
1200
500
1800
5500
2000
900
1500
3800
800
2500
1000
9300
3500
2000
300
3400
7.86
17.5
3.85
8.49
30.77
20.13
5.00
10.59
11.01
3.33
21.93
15.12
5.56
30.07
18.52
17.95
2.92
8.51
5.42
5.73
19.57
4.76
1.28
1.98
2.64
6.76
6.50
8.00
2.94
11.69
24.02
10.47
4.02
2.70
18.27
7.27
13.44
5.75
5.02
20.96
4.00
10.00
9.07
Jewish
Joly Geological
Juggling
Labour
Law
LGBT
Literary
M’mnt Science
Mathematical
Mature Students
Meditation
Metaphysical
Microbiological
Mod Lang
Music
Muslim Student
Nursing
One World
Orchestral
Paintball
Peer Support
Philosophical
Photographic
Physical
Players
Politics
PD’s
Psychology
Science Fiction
Sign Language
Singers
St Vincent de Paul
SUAS
Socialist Workers
Theological
Therapy
Trad Irish Music
T.A.W.
Trinity F.M.
Visual Arts
Werner Chemical
Yoga
Zoological
65
177
100
79
589
240
190
80
232
238
45
145
87
352
248
95
220
450
136
436
50
3697
250
330
700
113
60
119
850
75
90
4132
419
33
132
267
275
169
275
134
246
700
137
250
1500
1200
1500
2300
2000
2000
500
1750
1600
500
2100
600
700
1700
1300
700
3000
5300
1500
900
10700
4000
2000
10500
800
450
1400
1000
634
2200
6500
1000
1300
1000
400
1000
2000
2000
1300
666
500
1000
3.85
8.47
12.00
18.99
3.90
8.33
10.53
6.25
7.54
6.72
11.11
14.48
6.90
1.99
6.85
13.68
3.18
6.67
38.97
3.44
18.00
2.89
16.00
6.06
15.00
7.08
7.50
11.76
1.18
8.45
24.44
1.57
2.39
39.39
7.58
1.50
3.64
11.83
7.27
9.70
2.71
0.71
7.30
Totals:
28875
170650
-
Averages:
335.76
1984.30
5.91
Archive: Blasts from the Past Election banter starts as potential
candidates bicker at SU Council
Christine Bohan
As the SU elections draw near, Trinity News takes a look back to some of our
SU Alumni...
John Mannion is becoming
like the Gay Byrne of the
Students’ Union. At the final
Council last year he gave away
an iPod nano to one lucky class
rep, drawn at random. For last
week’s Council he gave out
Eddie Rocket’s vouchers to
everyone in the audience. Well,
all the class reps anyway. And
not just one either. Every rep
got 50 vouchers to give to their
classmates, with the names and
contact details of the five sabbat officers on the back of them
(perhaps to remind people not
to bite the hand that feeds
them?)
Giving things out
works well for several reasons.
Reps are more likely to attend
Council if they know there’s a
chance they might get something free (and of course the
chance to serve the democratic
process...). This means quorum
isn’t lost and all the business on
the agenda can be gotten
through. It’s a tangible sign of
the work the officers are doing
- whilst it’s mainly class reps
who will appreciate the hard
graft that the officers are putting in, the vouchers were an
effective gestures in making
sure all the other students in the
college know that they’re there,
working for them. And of
course, who’s going to turn
down free food? John sat down
to chants of ‘Four More Years!’
from appreciative reps.
It happened at the start
of Council, right after the nastiest motion of the evening. It
alleged that the Chair of
Council, David Quinn, had
acted impartialy and influenced
the decision of the Electoral
Commission when they made
an important decision at the
previous Council and should
therefore make a full apology.
The motion had some back-
towards the back of the Hall.
Gary Dillon spoke again, as
outraged as he’s ever been:
“Vote for me, vote against me,
but God help me, I know that
there is a problem with this
Chair... I favour no-one, I
FEAR NO-ONE!”.
The motion was
defeated.
The SU don’t like it
when we mention the Wands
and Sceptres Committee
because they think it trivialises
“John sat down to chants of ‘Four More Years!’
from appreciative reps”
ground. It’s no secret that
Quinn plans to run for SU
President, and there were
rumours circulating for several
days before Council that one of
his opponents had asked two
reps to bring forward this
motion, in an attempt to discredit his opponent.
Gary Dillon, the proposer of the motion vehemently denied this. As he pointed
out, he’s been bringing several
motions to every Council,
pointing out clearly problems
that he had with any perceived
wrong-doings, and didn’t need
someone to pull his strings, as
it were. A number of members
of the SU Executive got up to
speak to defend Quinn. David
himself called it a ‘dirty political tactic’ and was greeted with
heckles from a small but very
vocal number of reps sitting
all the work that the Union
does. And they’re right. But
this is an objective(ish) report
and so, the election to the W&S
Committee saw 11 nominations
for the five positions.
Unusually, the Chair deigned
not to hear speeches, and so the
decision was made solely on
the popularity of each of the
reps.
There were several
worthy motions which failed to
spark any debate. It was proposed that the SU opposes any
attempt to introduce fees in the
Student Health Centre. Passed.
That the SU lobby to stop franchises like O’Brien’s and
Starbucks from opening up on
campus. Passed. (Bit surpised
by that one, judging by the
amount of students who
frequent these places outside of
campus). That Goldsmith Hall
is badly equipped and should
be better. Also passed.
A motion that the SU
campaign to have the Rainbow
flag flown over Front Arch during rainbow week was presented by Ronan Hodson, the
LGBT Rights Officer and possibly the best-dressed man I’ve
ever seen at Council during my
four years as a class rep. John
Mannion spoke against the
motion, somewhat unwillingly
- he acknowledged immediately that the motion was going to
pass but that it could make
things difficult for him, as he
also has to lobby to get the tricolour flown and it’ll be difficult to get both. Stephanie
O’Brien, the Welfare Officer
spoke in favour and then another class rep got up to speak
against. He started out well,
quite
rational
really.
Unfortunately, it got worse. He
tried to sit on the fence. He
failed. He ended his speech
with: “This will make Trinity a
laughing stock”. He wasn’t
applauded when he sat down.
The motion was passed.
It was a good Council
- there was a lot of participation
from reps who hadn’t spoken
before which was good to see.
There was also a lot of talking
from people who are planning
on running for election in the
next couple of weeks - same
old, same old.
Comment & Opinion Editor: Patricia Van De Velde
Trinity News
COMMENT&OPINION
Tuesday January 24th, 2005
19
Russian Roulette Out of left-field
Religion seems to be coming with an ultimatum. But Críostóir Redmond would rather
dance with the devil, and see good without God. Or does he?
I was walking down Henry Street
towards O'Connell Street. I had
been minding my own business
shoe shopping or something like
that. I came to the corner by the
GPO where old men try to convert
the public by drawing funny pictures which give some sort of
moral guidance. I always just pass.
I never give a second look. When
suddenly this dour faced man started pontificating on the evils of sex
“Abstinence”, “God help you”,
I never go back...but I
did. I walked back to the old man
and handed him his piece of paper.
The moment I opened my mouth
and, quite meekly, said “your
leaflet is dangerous and has no
basis in fact”, I regretted it. I tried
to reason with the man. I tried to
give him some facts and statistics.
He would not let me get a word in
edgeways. He kept barking over
anything I said with mindless one
liner's. I would start to say “well, in
“I had let my guard down for one second and
there I was ranting at an old man who was ranting on a street corner.”
“sinners”, “God loves you”, it went
on and on like a stream of consciousness. It made no sense to me
but then again I could be missing
something, each to their own, sure
isn't that the way?
I always walk by...but he
shoved a leaflet into my hand,
which I would have thrown into the
nearest bin only I couldn't find one,
Dublin corporation where are you
when one needs you? I had pangs
of guilt, what a waste of paper, the
trees, what about the trees!? I could
feel the oxygen being depleted as I
walked paper in hand. Out of courtesy to whatever poor tree that had
been felled in order to make the
paper which this man had used, I
took a look.
It was a haphazard, amateurish document. On it were some
words which I skimmed over and a
diagram of some sort, I couldn’t
figure it out. It looked, for all the
world, like a little worm and some
flowers...or something. I had to go
back to read the text to make any
sense of it at all.
It explained how a sperm
is so much larger (that would be the
worm then) than any virus (those
would be his little friends). It went
on to say that these little friends
were so itty-bitty that they could
pass through a condom, leaving
spermy all awone inside. God loves
you it you don’t have sex. If you
do, you will die, so there is no point
in using a condom. Just DON'T
HAVE SEX!
Right, it’s not all bad I
suppose. If we were all celibate
until married, never ever had the
urge to have sex unless we were in
love, and if we all had the will
power of I dunno wha...Then condoms would be bad, of course! I
mean, for a start we would probably be using them as part of a novel
party trick, or for the washing up,
but who wants to use fingerless
gloves to do the washing up!?
Spain a study was carried out on
135 heterosexual couples with
mixed status, where usually the
man was HIV positive. Over 10
years an account was kept of their
sexual activities, not once had HIV
been passed on. They had used
condoms”. Of course it didn’t come
out like that, above my voice was a
stream of “Russian roulette”,
“Gods hands”, “the devils way”
etc. etc. You get the idea.
I tried to reason with
him. I became more and more flustered and irate, until we came to a
climax, a crescendo of “get your
facts straight” and “sinners are
dancing with the devil”. I turned
and walked away, noticing how a
group of passers-by had congregated to watch this spectacle. I felt
somewhat embarrassed. Rats! I had
let my guard down for one second
and there I was ranting at an old
man who was ranting on a street
corner. I have learnt my lesson and
in the wise words of a friend of
mine, “one really should show a little more decorum”.
The thing that passed me
by during all this was that this man
was, well, religious. He was
preaching on the street for our
good, in the name of Christ
almighty (does “almighty” get a
capital ‘A’?). So is that what it
means to be religious? Is it going to
mass, praying to God, Allah,
Buddha, whoever? Is it standing
on street corners pushing God's
love (“c’mere, have ye got any a
God’s love?”)? “...but what about
all the good stuff that religious people have done? The schools and
hospitals in Africa, how will they
ever educate themselves without
religious groups? Who is going to
look after them when they are
sick?” I hear the religious hordes
cry.
Well excuse me if I scoff
at this. I know it has been said
many times before! At the risk of
Europe used to be proud of its left, but Nick Kelly is not that
impressed. Is Europe’s left becoming more like America’s?
I’ve just returned from the US,
where the Democratic Party’s slide
into inconsequence would be
funny if it weren’t so sad. Even
with Bush’s approval rating below
50%, the left has been unable to
successfully oppose a far-right idealogue’s nomination to the
Supreme Court, a man who, as part
of the Reagan administration formulated a strategy to re-criminalize abortion.
Nor could it convince
the American public that domestic
wiretapping is a dangerous contravention of the Constitution. And
the bold new strategy to break out
of this pit of irrelevance? Wait till
2008 and run a Clinton for president, the unpleasant one this time.
“Why is the left
doomed to react,
criticize and protest
instead of leading?
You don’t need to be
in power to present
and promote new
ideas...”
So, back in Europe, have
I been rubbing and blinking my
eyes and basking in the brilliant
light of a progressive society, shining with new ideas and growing
equality? Hardly. A quick glance
across the major players: Britain is
helmed by W’s prayer group
buddy, who has succeeded the
Clinton way—co-opting ideas
from the center-right and seasoning them a bit to be more palatable
to the center-left.
In France, the biggest
impact of the riots has been the
increased popularity of Nicolas
Sarkozy, the government minister
who called the rioters “scum.”
Germany has a rightwing prime minister replace
Schroeder, who retires to a cushy
job with the consortium in charge
of a Russian-German gas pipeline.
The EU is stuttering after failing to
get a Constitutional treaty passed.
And the Kyoto Treaty, perhaps the
biggest recent accomplishment of
the left, has not been (and most
likely will not be) ratified by
China, India or the US.
Why is the left doomed
to react, criticize and protest
instead of leading? You don’t
need to be in power to present and
promote new ideas…in fact, that’s
how you get into power.
Over the past decades, the
American right-wing, feeling
besieged by the liberal media and
academia established think-tanks,
privately funded quasi-academic
centers of study, which have been
paying off now with new ideas and
the confidence to try and change
the world.
Liberals, from their supposed position of power in the
University (which, despite an
obsession with diversity, are too
politically homogeneous for productive debate) are not interested
in changing the world. Their energy is devoted to puzzling out societies’ concepts of what the world
is, and deconstructing how scholars examine how societies conceptiualize the world, all the while
with an arch eyebrow raised at
those who would use the terms
“change” and “the world” without
ensconcing them in quotation
marks and qualifications.
Postmodernism and its
accompanying disposition, irony,
need not be so paralyzingly parasitic and self obsessed.
Irony can just be snarky
comments shot sideways when
confronted by the embarrassingly
sincere, but it can also be an effec-
Liberals, from their
supposed position
of power in the
University are not
interested in changing the world.
tive way to address serious topics
without being stuffy or sententious.
Film
writer-director
Todd Solondz (Welcome to the
Dollhouse,
Happiness,
Storytelling, Palindromes) makes
brilliant use of dark humor to keep
the viewer engaged while watching and the ideas in his or her head
long after the film is over.
Solondz deals with child molestation, teen pregnancy and interracial sexual concerns, among other
issues with an ironic coolness that
distances the viewer just enough to
consider the subject matter without the usual cultural clutter.
Postmodernism needn’t
trap a thinker in a hall of mirrors,
generating a million new images
of images, a million new questions
of questions. Its subversive, stimulating qualities should lead to
creative destruction—as the movement’s
forefather
Friedrich
Nietzsche imagined—instead of
just destruction. If society is a
construct, why can’t we convince
people to construct a better one?
God is back on the streets.
being accused of sounding clichéd.
There is that little issue of the
Catholic Church preaching abstinence in Africa, telling poor souls
not to sin by using condoms and we
all know how well that is working
over there. Only too well.
I am not here to write a
polemic, but why oh why do all
things that religious groups do for
“good” come with an ultimatum?
Where is the altruism? Wherever
you find religious groups helping,
you will get a sense of conversion,
pray with us, assimilate and you
will be ok. Homogenisation of the
masses that is what religious leaders want. I don’t blame religion. Of
course not! I blame religious peo-
ple who twist and pervert religion
and belief. Without religious people there would be no religion.
Why can we not put the good that
has, is, and can be done by people
for other people down to the power
of the human spirit, humanity
even?
But no! I am not mindlessly ripping something to shreds
because I may have read a good
article, heard a religious leader say
it, or have seen it “on de telly”. I,
for one, like to make informed and
rational decisions for myself. Does
this sound pompous!? No! Not
pompous! It sounds like common
sense to me.
Blair is leaning to the left. But it’s hard to see what’s on the left these days.
Power: For Dummies
Derek Owens’ fortnightly update on the seizing of power from the great unwashed. He returns this after an absemce with ‘The Fear Factor’
The Big Mac is back...
Every day brings another naysayer. Well, the same nay-sayer to
be precise. After having his faulty
logic (and eating habits) exposed in
a previous column, a certain friend,
after being adamantly opposed to
orchestrating the campaigns of five
puppets for the Student Union elections (the power: for dummies project,) simply stopped talking about
it. Until last week. Turning to me
with a self-satisfied grin, he asked
me just how Power: For dummies
was going.
It’s impossible to properly
describe the smugness of his deliv-
ery. My friend knows full well that
since (foolishly) making the
Power: For dummies project as
public as possible, I am about as
popular among would-be election
candidates as a leper, charity-mugger, or an imported Turkish chicken.
I started blustering that, though
there hasn’t exactly been a fantastic
response (the confirmed readership
of this column is roughly four people, and that includes my editor)
the basic theory is sound.
“Rubbish”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, all this Machiavelli stuff…
This is where cordial relations
broke down. I set off on a robust
defence of the ‘Big Mac’ (causing a
bit of a scene in Eddie Rocket’s)
only to be interrupted again: “But
all his ‘better to be feared than
loved’ advice is just outdated! It
just doesn’t apply nowadays.”
It’s probably for the best that he
cut in there; the door staff looked
uneasy at the presence of an intoxicated political firebrand, and the
comment made me calm down and
think. Superficially, of course, he’sright – if people are afraid of you,
they’re not likely to vote for you.
When you give Machiavelli the
benefit of the doubt, though, you
see his advice is just as useful
today.
more powerful factor in peoples
decision making than gratitude, or
fondness. Memories don’t stuff
ballot boxes; expectations do. In
any election, you vote for the person who either promises the most,
or scares you the least. You can win
elections by promising the world,
or convincing everyone that your
opponent is capable of destroying
it. The first tactic can work, but
people expect you to deliver on at
least some of your commitments;
the latter carries no such weight of
obligation.
This is why negative campaigning is so attractive to political professionals, and will always be with
us. More responsible folk (quite
rightly) complain that it’s crude,
lazy and often disgusting but only
“They won because Tory leader Michael
Howard really does have something of the
night about him”
The reasoning behind the glib
‘better feared than loved’ line wasn’t just that if annoying people are
afraid of you, they’re less likely to
bother you; the big Mac realised
that fear of the future was a much
rarely dispute the crucial point: It
works. Those that do are wishful
thinkers, ignoring the facts.
For proof, just look at the last
three significant elections in the
English-speaking world. Across the
channel, Labour didn’t best the
Tories in 2005 by their record of
invading Middle Eastern countries,
chipping away at civil liberties and
pumping impressive sums of
money into public services with
less impressive results. They won
because Tory leader Michael
Howard really does have something of the night about him,
because a particularly nutty
Conservative mentioned that £20
Billion could be pulled from public
services, and because a masterful
negative campaign blitz linked a
Conservative future with the
Thatcherite past.
The U.S. Presidential election
was another example of negative
campaigning bringing positive
results. While John Kerry heeded
the well meaning, self-deluding
analysts who held that relentless
positivity was the way to the White
House, the Bush machine successfully made Kerry look like a dishonest, careerist, flip-flopping jelly
man by mid-September..
It was only in October,
when Kerry started putting the boot
in to Bush’s appalling record in
office, that he started to make serious inroads into his opponent’s
lead. He’d left it too late though,
and thrown away an election
thought unlosable a year before.
The rest, as they say, is catastrophe.
And then there’s our last general election, where fear ruled
“if annoying people
are afraid of you
they’re less likely to
bother you”
supreme. Fine Gael promised anything they could to anyone who’d
listen, only to be annihilated. It
wasn’t that Fianna Fáil ‘bought the
election’ as some muttered (though
a giveaway budget did help) but the
sheer ineptitude of Michael
Noonan’s merry band.
A quick scan of Fine
Gael’s front bench, and a thought
of what havoc they could wreak in
office, was enough to make a hardened blueshirt think twice.
Meanwhile, the PD’s were the only
ones who successfully exploited
the public’s morbid fear of Fianna
Fáil in government alone: With
polls showing that a majority even
of Fianna Fáil voters favoured a
coalition government to one-party
rule, the PD’s launched their ‘one
party government or us’ campaign.
The ploy, entirely dependent on a
deep-seeded fear among the electorate, swung at least two crucial
seats their way.
The responsible folk’s complaints are valid: In the long-term,
negative campaigning turns people
off mainstream politics and is corrosive to democracy. But in the
long term, cows are some of the
greatest producers of greenhouse
gases. We still love our doublegreaseburgers. Because beef, and
political success, tastes good now.
And there will always be people for
whom that is the only consideration. For them, fear is as effective
as any political tool. Machiavelli’s
line may need translation for the
modern age (‘better your opponent
be feared than you be loved’) but
the thinking behind it is as truthful
today as it ever was.
Loathe as some people
are to admit it, the Big Mac is still
the man. If the Power: For
Dummies project is to overcome
incompetence, apathy, and all the
other obstacles in the way, I’m
going to need his help.
COMMENT&OPINION
20
Tuesday January 24th, 2005
Redefining Consent
Rape has always been a crime. But in recent court cases there seems to be confusion
as to what exactly rape is.Ruth Patten examines the appaling double standards that
are crippling the justice system.
On the 24th of November 2005 a
UK rape case involving a university security guard escorting a student back to her rooms, was withdrawn after the girl admitted under
cross-examination that she was too
drunk to remember if she had given
consent.
Prosecution lawyers
dropped the case because “drunken
consent is still consent” and the
judge instructed the jury to bring a
not guilty verdict “even if you
don’t agree”.
The case was made public when a press release from Vera
Baird Q.C, MP for Redcar condemned the judge for disregarding
the Sexual Offence Act, made law
in 2003. In Section 74 of the
Sexual Offence Act it is the remit
of the defendant to prove that they
thought the victim was conscious
before and while having sex. This
Act was originally brought in to
protect both men and women from
having sex forced on them.
According to the MP’s
press release, the girl had consumed a small amount of alcohol
and felt ill. Like many universities
in Great Britain the University of
Aberystwyth in Wales has a policy
that a security guard will on request
accompany a student back to their
residence on campus after hours.
The policy was put in place in
order for the students to be protected on the open campus late at night.
On this occasion the student was walked home by a security guard who had sex with her outside her house, “she said she had
passed out, woken up briefly aware
that something was happening, and
passed out again.” The press statement goes on to state “Section 74
of the 2003 Sexual Offences Act
makes crystal clear that a person
can only consent to sex if they
agree by choice and have the freedom and capacity to make that
choice. How does an unconscious
woman have that capacity?”
An Amnesty
International survey of 1,000
Britons found that 28% of people
believe that if a woman is flirtatious she partially responsible if
she is raped. Shockingly, 6% felt
she would be totally responsible. A
people face to face for support and
counselling in 2004. The numbers
do not match.
In a UK survey in More
Magazine 23 per cent of women
said they believed that their drinks
have been spiked in the past. Only
one in twenty women felt safe
walking the streets alone. While
this survey was more anecdotal and
its facts less easily proven than the
others, its numbers show an
increased awareness of the dangers
faced by women if they wish to
socialise in bars or clubs at night.
It is a brutal irony that
the more the public are made aware
“Only 6% of reported rapes get convictions and it is
not known how many women do not even bother
reporting their sexual assault to the authorities.”
similar percentage said she would
be likewise partially responsible if
she were wearing revealing clothing.
There were over 12,000
reported rapes in Britain in
2004/2005. Only 6% of reported
rapes get convictions and it is not
known how many women do not
even bother reporting their sexual
assault to the authorities. In Ireland
the figure is drastically different,
with 65 reported rapes in the Irish
Republic in 2004.
However
according to the National Rape
Crisis Statistics 2004, the 15 Irish
Rape Crisis centres received
45,000 calls and saw over 2,200
of the dangers to women from
those who would prey on them
while vulnerable due to alcohol,
the more women are held responsible for the crimes committed
against them. Frequently on the
Trinity campus are posters for parties where women are fully expected to dress appropriately for the
theme. If they do so are we to
believe that they are going to be
actively encouraging their own
rape?
Everyday we all see
advertisements on billboards, magazines and our television screens
promoting the consumption of
alcohol to both women and men,
should these same glossy P.R. exercises carry a health warning?
Should posters around college
campuses warn female students
that attending a “Gangster & Hos”,
“Jocks & Cheerleaders” or “School
Disco” party attired in the themed
costume could lead to an assault?
If people believe women who dress
sexily are asking to be raped then
should responsible student societies or even the Students’ Union
organise and advertise these
events?
Without doubt, such a
draconian measure would seem
unfair on the societies and the students, male and female, who enjoy
attending such activities, but what
can be done to change the society
that leaves women facing a Catch
22. If a woman acts in the manner
she is expected to, she leaves herself open to assault.
With this particular case,
Vera Baird MP has requested the
Lord Chancellor investigate the
Judge’s behaviour and the case
may be reviewed. The prosecution
lawyers and judge -all male- disregarded the Sexual Offence Act in
favour of their own opinions,
which were parallel to the attitudes
of roughly one third of the British
public. Or perhaps they were simply untrained in the new law and
may not have understood it.
However, whatever the reason, the
misinterpretation of this important
law can only bring further suffering
to the legitimate victims of sexual
assault.
Comment & Opinion Editor: Patricia Van De Velde
Trinity News
Poker Time
Poker is back as an acceptable pastime. However, real winners are still few
and far between. Dave O’Callaghan goes through what it really takes.
Poker has come a long way in the
past few years. The advent of televised poker, in the form of shows
such as ‘The World Series of
Poker’ and ‘The World Poker
Tour’, has done a lot to change the
public’s perception of the game.
It’s no longer seen as seedy, played
by mobsters and degenerates in
smoky pool halls, but more as an
acceptable social past time; something to do rather than going to the
pub.
Trinity, U.C.D. and
D.I.T. all run hugely successful
card clubs, and hold regular tournaments with entry fees for as little as
€5 to cater for the poor student’s
meagre bankroll. Over the past two
years several new card clubs have
opened up in Dublin, Cork,
Galway, Waterford, Killarney and
Belfast. The majority of people that
frequent these places hold down
successful jobs, and often you will
find doctors, lawyers and dentists
at the table.
In fact Ireland’s three
most successful poker players,
Donnacha O’Dea, Andrew Black
and Padraig Parkinson, who
between them have won over €3m,
are all graduates of our very own
Trinity College. But what does this
new found respectability mean for
poker, and is it perhaps misleading
some people about what can in fact
be a very dangerous game?
The fact of the matter is
that despite being an extremely
skilful, social, and enjoyable game,
most players are losing money.
This is not something that most
people will admit to, and a brief
survey of players would probably
find that about 70% to 80% claim
to be winners. However statistics
released by online casinos have
shown that in fact only between 5%
and 15% of online poker players
actually turn a profit..
“What winning poker
players all have in common is strict self discipline.”
Television chooses to
gloss over this side of the game om
favour of entertainment value, but
the reality is that for each of those
people you see scooping some
seven figure prize pool, there were
probably two hundred odd people
down $10,000 or more for the day,
many of whom really couldn’t
afford to lose that amount of
money.
In the poker world these
players are referred to as ‘donators’, and they are essential for the
poker economy to keep growing.
The problem is that the
majority of aspiring players don’t
see this side of things, and begin
playing poker with the naïve attitude that they are too good or too
smart to lose money. It is this
naivety that proves to be the downfall of most inexperienced and
beginning poker players. Not to be
aware of the dangers of the game
will almost certainly result in the
loss of a lot of money. Things can
very quickly spiral out of control,
and it is possible to lose thousands
in a matter of minutes at the higher
levels.
What winning poker
players all have in common is strict
self discipline. While a good
knowledge of psychology and
probability can be extremely helpful, any professional poker player
will tell you that these skills pale in
comparison to the importance of
discipline and self control. It’s no
coincidence
that
Padraig
Parkinson, Andrew Black and
Donnacha O’Dea all obtained college degrees. They all had the
drive, determination and self discipline to do so, and it is for these
reasons that they are successful at
poker also.
So if you’re planning on
taking up poker, or even if you
have done so already, don’t be
overawed by what you see on television. Always bear in mind that
despite being an extremely skilled
game, it is also extremely dangerous. Being aware of this at all times
is the single most important factor
in determining whether you will be
a winning poker player or a donator.
Today’s ‘Cult of Speed’
Jean Devlin takes a look a society’s obsesssion with fast everything, and prescribes a
philosophy of slow: a healthier life takes a step back to enjoy itself.
Ireland has one of the worst records
in Europe for deaths in road accidents – 528 lives were lost in 2004
and the figure for last year is even
higher. The biggest killer : speed.
Whether it’s working parents rushing to pick up their child from the
creche before six, or the Minister of
Sport striving to make it to Dublin
for a cabinet meeting, the need to
speed applies to everyone. And it’s
not only on the roads that speed has
become such a hazard. It is a feature of modern life. Not only do we
want faster cars ; we want faster
computers, faster music, faster
food.
In the rush of today’s
world it is easy to lose the art of
slowness, and arguably, most of us
have. Recently however, a number
of well-respected writers and journalists have documented the
revival of slowness in a society
where time is money and money is
paramount.
Food was one of the first
areas to speed up, with the introduction of commercial farming,
chemical fertilisers and pesticides,
growth hormones, and more
recently genetic modification. With
McDonalds and other such chains
the fast food phenomenon swept
throughout the world, promising
tasty food ready in minutes. As life
got faster people rushed to replicate
the convenience of fast food at
home, and so microwave meals and
prewashed salads have cut preparation time for meals. So has the time
taken to consume them - the average meal in McDonalds lasts no
longer than eleven minutes, and the
concept of a family meal has
almost disappeared with the strain
of different schedules dictating
mealtimes. The average British
family actually spends more time
together in the car than they do
around the dinner table!
The backlash against the
Galloping Death
So what does it mean to
be ‘slow’? It doesn’t have to mean
doing everything at a snail’s pace.
According to Carl Honoré, author
of “In Praise of Slow” it’s a frame
of mind; remaining calm and
unflustered even when circumstances force us to speed up. We
can consider it an art to be revived
in all areas of life – the kitchen, the
workplace, the doctor’s office and
the bedroom.
Since the Industrial
Revolution speed and efficiency
have become a dogma infusing all
areas of life. Measuring time accurately became crucial and a major
step towards the global standardisation of time came in 1884 when
twenty-seven nations agreed to
recognise Greenwich as the prime
meridian, and time became a commodity.
fast food hegemony started in Italy
in the late Eighties when Mc
Donalds opened a branch at the
Spanish Steps in Rome, sparking
the foundation of the Slow Food
movement. It aims to promote the
exact opposite of what McDonalds
is about – fresh, local, seasonal
produce; artisanal production;
recipes passed down through generations; sustainable farming and
leisurely dining.
Since its foundation
Slow Food has built up a membership of 78,000 in over fifty countries, and the values it promulgates
are appreciated and practised by
many more. The recent television
series by Jamie Oliver in which he
rehauls the school dinner system in
English schools is just the latest in
a stream of programmes by celebrity chefs pulling in considerable rat-
ings.
Another area in which
people are starting to slow down is
the workplace, although of the
American capitalist model which
encourages workaholism is still
dominant in most sectors.
Nonetheless, more and more peo-
80% of pain clinics offer acupuncture. CAM’s slow approach is to let
the body heal itself, through gentle
holistic care, as opposed to the tendency of many GPs to reach for
their prescription pad at every consultation, effectively just throwing
drugs at the symptoms rather than
“The central tenet of the slow philosophy is pleasure- taking the time to do things properly means
we enjoy them more. This is perhaps nowhere
more true than in the bedroom.”
ple are opting to job-share instead
of working full-time, for example.
Even in Japan, whose fearsome
work ethic astonished the world in
the Eighties and Nineties, slowness
is making a comeback. New legislation on jobsharing and reduced
working hours has been introduced, and pundits talk of a new
generation of fureeta, a fusion of
the English ‘free’ and the German
‘arbeiter’ (worker).
Working less can make
people more productive as they
have more time to relax, which is
key to reflection and creative thinking. They have more time for family, friends and leisure activities.
Among the latter slow hobbies, like
yoga, tai chi and even plain old
knitting are becoming increasingly
popular. The benefit is not only
psychological, but also physical;
stress is the most common cause of
insomnia, preventing the deep
sleep essential to cell regeneration
that bolsters the immune system
and boosts the metabolism.
Slowing down is often
the best medicine for stress-related
ailments, and is a common advisement given by practitioners of
alternative therapies to their
patients. From acupuncture to reiki,
and homeopathy to massage therapy, the growth of complementary
and alternative medicine (CAM)
has been phenomenal in recent
years, with celebrity adherents
such as Gwyneth Paltrow and
Madonna giving the movement a
high media profile.
The world of conventional medicine is conscious of the
significants benefits, whether psychosomatic or real, and is making
attempts to integrate both
approaches into national health
systems. In Germany, for instance,
treating the often complex cause.
The central tenet of the
slow philosophy is pleasure – taking the time to do things properly
means we enjoy them more. This is
perhaps nowhere more true than in
the bedroom, where the strains of
modern life and hectic schedules
militate against hours of, as Woody
Allen would say, the most fun you
can have without laughing. Sex is
an important part of healthy living
– Oprah’s Dr. Phil recommends
three sessions of love-making a
week as a way to keep fit.
But quality is just as
important as quantity, and the
Tantra movement, memorably
endorsed by Sting, is about slowing
down and getting more than a
drunken fumble in the dark. Tantric
workshops have sprung up all over
where couples or singletons can go
to spend a weekend of learning to
improve their sensuality. And
according to those who’ve tried it,
it’s worth the effort!
Challenging the cult of
speed in society isn’t simple but it
can be very rewarding. It doesn’t
have to mean drastic changes – it
can be as simple as making your
own soup from scratch instead of
buying an over-priced instant Cup
of Soup sachet, or going for a
leisurely coffee and chatting with
friends instead of maxing your
credit card buying things you don’t
really need.
On a more general level,
a slower society delivers more of
the things that truly make us happy,
things that cannot be measured by
economic proxy – good health, better relationships, strong communities and a cleaner environment. The
urge to accelerate is still strong, but
slowness is catching up.
Lust in Translation
Words can be confusing. Especially ones that are used negatively. And in relation to sex. Ethel Harness sets the record strait
on the term of slut.
These days many words crop up in
our every day vocabulary whose
meanings can be nebulous and
ambiguous. Slut is one of those
words. To be specific it is necessary for me to establish that a slut
can only be a female. It can be used
quite casually to designate a girl
who has a nicer coat or perfect hair.
But generally slut is used to define
a girl who is loose with her sexual
favours and who demands no pecuniary reparations for sex.
I find that more and more I disagree with this definition of the
word, which is why in this piece I
will examine two very different
conceptions of a slut.
The first one is indeed the afore
mentioned which I call Sluts of the
Flesh. These girls are not led by
reason but by the Passions of the
flesh. This is perhaps evil and
immoral but I have it on good
authority that this is quite the lesser of many Evils in this world. The
intellect and brain is not used in
these cases so we cannot accuse
these girls of deviousness or cunning.
The second type of slut I will
elaborate more on as this one is relatively unknown to the world at
large. They are what I call Emo
Sluts (or Soul Slappers). They
parade around having just as much
sexual intercourse as a regular slut
but they not only give their bodies
they also throw in their emotions.
Some may call it a
bonus; I call it very fine print. I
believe that the matters of the soul
are tenfold more valuable than any
favours of the flesh and that what
these girls give away so easily is so
precious (and what is more should
be earned and not just taken for
granted) that it is a travesty of relationships. Of course I am not calling sluts the girls who genuinely
like their other halves. The word
slut is derogatory mainly because it
designates someone who doesn’t
really value themselves because
they give away their intimacy so
easily. Who can like or value someone who doesn’t value themselves?
Sluts of the Flesh will
give away their bodies and enjoy
the process thoroughly, whereas
the Soul Slappers will not only give
away their bodies but they will also
give away their feelings. They are
letting outsiders into their inner
psyche and so they may perhaps
have enjoyed the sex but more
often than not they will eventually
get crushed, stamped, trodden,
carved and flattened (I really do not
mean to sound pessimistic or bitter).
As their pathetic soul
selling life will continue they will
fall into the habit of saying words
without meaning. Their feelings
will be so used and reused that
when they express their emotions
they will carry no significance and
they will end up bitter and empty
They will have not only given up
their bodies for sinful pleasures but
they will have lost their spirit as
well. So a well meaning piece of
advice to all females: build up
those inner defences and think
three times before you let anyone
in. Oh, and always use protection.
Comments, Tips, Hate-mail to: vandevep@tcd.ie. Please feel free to send comment or opinion articles to the same address.
All views expressed in the Comment & Opinion section are those of the authors of the individual articles and not those of Trinity News
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
Trinity News
EST. 1947
LETTERS
Scrapping of
Schol. and
Selling of MA
Sir,
Election Time is Back
The rumour mill has started back up meaning it
can only be one time of year. The Students’
Union elections are rolling back around and as
usual there are a whole host of names being
bandied about as possible successors to John
Mannion and co.
While the elections may be of limited interest to
some students they are an event all should take
an interest in. For anyone considering running
for election I offer nothing but encouragement.
Running for election is one of the most interesting and memorable experiences you can have in
your time in Trinity. From speaking in front of
classes of hundreds of people to speaking in the
rain on the Dining Hall steps, an election campaign will leave you with many fond memories
even if you’re not succesful. If you are succesful
you’ll get the chance to prove whether your
claims you could do a better job than the encumbents are true or not.
Amongst all the hype it cannot be forgotten however that a student has died in the past week of
a heart attack while on campus. While all the
possible medical available was surely given to
them, the matter raises the question of portable
defibrillators. A possible campaign for SU present and future to address could be asking college to provide portable defibrillators in major
areas around campus such as the Dining Hall,
the Arts Block, and the Hamilton. While we all
obviously hope that we will never see another
heart attack on campus, anything that could
increase the chances of survival in such an
emergency would surely be worthwhile and
show all the good work the SU can do.
Icarus Editor
Wanted
Trinity Publications is looking
for a new editor for its
Literary Publication Icarus
Icarus won Magazine of the
Year at the 2005 National
Student Media Awards and
the position of editor is open
to all Trinity students
For more information contact
mckennak@tcd.ie
21
I am grateful to 'Trinity News'
(and John Lavelle and Jonathan
Drennan) for publishing the proposal to scrap the Scholarship
Examination (the first time I
have heard of such a retrograde
proposal)and examining the status of the Trinity MA. The common denominator, it seems, is the
placing of financial matters
above scholarly ones. Let me say
that I am proud of our present
scholars as I am proud of the
scholars of the past, including in
their number Edmund Burke
who won Scholarship in 1746.
Very best wishes,
Gerald Morgan
FTCD (1993)
Trinity MA
Sir,
In relation to the issue of the
University of Dublin ‘’selling’
the Master in Arts degree I wish
to clarify a number of points. The
MA degree is a historic institution within this historic university and proposals to scrap it are
disrespectful to the traditions of
the university. Deputy Olwen
Enright (FG) seems to claim it
gives graduates an unfair advantage over graduates of the other
universities who must work for a
post-graduate MA, however it is
the other universities that are
incorrect to award the MA as a
post-graduate degree. The historical background to the award of
the degree is that traditionally a
degree in the liberal arts took 7
years to complete. The end of the
period of study was marked by
awarding of an MA to signify
that the graduate had received
the license to teach in the college. No examination was
required before inception as a
Master in Arts, the candidate
already having been tested for
the conferring of the BA. The
degree traditionally bestowed
full membership rights of the
University Senate upon the graduate, with the right to vote in
elections. In Trinity an MA continues to outrank all other
degrees, except Doctors of
Divinity and Common Law.
I would argue that the other universities are incorrect in the manner that they award the MA.
Trinity distinguishes between the
MA and the Master in
Philosophy, which is broadly
similar to, for example, the UCD
MA. It would appear that, looking at the MA in its historical
context, that Oxford, Cambridge
and Dublin are correct in how
they award the degree and that
the other Irish universities offering the MA as a postgraduate
degree are wrong to do so. They
should either adopt a similar procedure of awarding the MA 7
years following matriculation or
discontinue it as a postgraduate
degree.
not so much ‘boycott us,’ then, as
‘boycott them.’
Yours etc.,
Yours etc.,
Eimhin J. Walsh
Junior Freshman, History &
Theology
Joshua Edelman
Chair, TCD Jewish Society
Portrayal of
Israel
Sir,
Sir,
Hugh Harkin (“Boycott Israel’s
Apartheid, Trinity News 15th
Nov) certainly has the right to his
opinions about Israel, but trying
to defend them, his article makes
a number of objectively false
claims that require refutation.
His claim that “Israel has full and
complete control over the entire
biblical land between the
Mediterranean and the Jordan
river” is one that many
Palestinians, including of course
the Palestinian Authority (P.A.)
itself, would dispute. He seems
to ignore the recent Israeli pullout from the whole of Gaza, a
milestone unthinkable a few
years back. Perhaps more cynically, if Israel did in fact have the
control Mr Harkin assumes,
organized suicide bombing campaigns against Israeli civilians
would have stopped. Sadly, they
have not.
I wish to say something about the
square root of 121 question in the
“Is our children learning?” article.
Yes I agree that a smart alek
would state +/- 11. But an intelligent person would say 11 as the
square root of a number is
always positive. Only in algebraic equations e.g. x squared = 121
=> x = +/- 11 are there positive
and negative answers.
Otherwise, congratulations on
publishing such a entertaining
newspaper!
Junior Freshman law student
Wands
and
Sceptres Article
Finally, his claim that Prof. Ilan
Pappe of the University of Haifa,
“like many other Israelis, is
screaming
‘boycott
us!’”
requires serious clarification. I’m
not sure who these unnamed
‘others’ are, but certainly they,
like Pappe, are not actually asking to be
boycotted. Prof
Pappe’s acceptance of Mr
Harkin’s invitation to come
speak at Trinity — a right the
boycott would deny to his colleagues at Haifa, Arab and
Jewish alike — shows that he
sees himself as an exception to
his own proposal. The scream is
&
Corrections
Clarifications
Andrew Payne
trinity.news@tcd.ie
Deputy Editor:
Jonathan Drennan
drennajw@tcd.ie
TNT Editor:
Christine Bohan
bohanc@tcd.ie
Photography Editor:Karina Finegan Alves
finegank@tcd.ie
Editorial Team
News:
John Lavelle
lavelljd@tcd.ie
Assistant News:
Una Faulkner
faulkneu@tcd.ie
News Feature:
Gearoid O’Rourke
orourkgd@tcd.ie
National:
Anne Marie Ryan
aryan19@tcd.ie
International:
Doaa Baker
dobaker@tcd.ie
Features:
Kathryn Segesser & Liz Johnson
segessek@tcd.ie
Comment:
Patricia Van de Velde
vandevep@tcd.ie
Secondly,
The person in question failed
mention that Miss O'Brien works
extremely hard in her given task
always willing and always has
time for everyone's needs including that of the disabled. She cares
deeply about peoples needs, she
is the Welfare Officer after all.
They in their letter attempt to
inform us what Disability
Awareness should be about.
Obviously they have failed to
take advantage of all that was on
offer throughout the week so as
to educate themselves about "the
difficulties facing those with a
disability in college" as quoted
by the author.
Thirdly,
The complaint that this person
has, has been taken out of context and I would hope that the
person in question should get to
know Miss O'Brien and I assure
you they would regret their comments. The person in question
would do well to remember that
in this arena such heated and
unjustified words such as theirs
come with reaction and consequence. I'm all for the right to
free speech but not when it borders on slander. I also understand
that it is not up to the editor to
deny free speech.
I leave my full details below and
look forward to a reply.
Sir,
His claim that “Palestinian Arabs
in Israel, who make up 20% of
the population, are confined to
only 7% of the land” is utter nonsense. Palestinian Arab citizens
of the State of Israel have all the
rights of Jewish (or any other)
citizens. They all have equal
freedom of movement and equal
rights to religious practice,
health care, education, social
services, and the like. In many
ways, Arab women in Israel have
more freedoms than in any of the
Arab states. In cities like Haifa
and Tel Aviv, Jews and Arabs
live, work, and study (in the very
universities Mr Harkin would
boycott) side by side. That this is
not the case in the territories is,
in my mind, a glaring injustice,
but that does not change the situation within the State proper.
Trinity News
Editor:
Is Our Children
Learning
doesn't seem noble at all. If one
causes conflict one must be prepared to accept the reaction from
those who disagree with them
and not hide away.
I would like to request an apology for the statement in TN
(Crowns and Sceptres issue)
relating to my speech on the
topic. The writer, one Ms.
Bohan, claimed that I had a
speech prepared. This is a false
accusation. I was, in fact, drunk.
Yours,
Vincent O'Mahony
Junior Freshman (Intake 05)
Nursing
omahonyv@tcd.ie
Yours etc.,
Starbucks
Neil McGough
Trinity News apologises to Mr
McGough for any offense or
misunderstanding caused - Ed
Welfare Officer
Comments
Sir,
I write to you in relation to the
comments made about the
Welfare officer, Miss Stephanie
O'Brien in the last edition of 'letters to the Editor'.
Firstly,
The reason I write to you and not
the author of this inaccurate
piece is because the person in
question failed to take responsibility for their words/comments
by choosing to deny the student
population their identity. That
Sir,
Your article "Starbucks is coming to Trinity" (6/12/05),has been
published three months too late.
As any student attending St
James Hospital will tell you, the
mermaid has arrived!
We were aghast to see the coffee
shop (we'd waited 3 years for)
out in St James Hospital serves
Starbucks coffee. Personally I
am hugely disappointed in
Trinity College for giving the
contract to such a widely criticized multi-national company.
I realize there has been difficulties in finding a retailer for the
space. However moral issues
must prevail. Starbucks coffee
has caused consternation the
world over on consumer, environmental and social justice
grounds. The Trinity campus has
an excellent track record in these
matters, boycotting both CocaCola and Nestle products. It is
evident Starbucks wish to find a
way in to the lucrative Irish market. I am hugely disappointed
that they found it in Trinity
College Dublin. I am left wondering where this will end... If
the Buttery contract comes up for
grabs, will Trinity give it to
McDonalds?
Yours sincerely,
Name with Editor
“Deaf-Dumb”
Comments
Sir,
I would like to write a reply to
the controversial letter regarding
the term “deaf-dumb”, sent from
two hearing impaired students.
I, myself, was not amused at
mention of me as “deaf-dumb”.
The term “deaf-dumb” and
“deaf-mute” is out of date. The
actual term is “deaf”, “hearing
impaired” and “hard of hearing”.
As I am totally deaf, hearing aid
is of no help to me.
To Princes William and Harry,
respectively, I introduced myself
as follows:
“I am deaf and communicate in
writing with people because of
my poor lip reading and unintelligible speech”.
Writing is my only means of conversation. I do not know well
sign language.
Hearing people prefer voice to
writing. So deaf people prefer
sign language to writing.
When Diana the Princess of
Wales was the honorary patron of
the British Association for the
Deaf, she learned sign language
through video for 3 months and
thus managed to deliver speech
in sign language in meetings and
to chat sign language with deaf
people. I wrote to her that I was
ashamed not to try to learn sign
language.
I wonder if the hearing impaired
students in question have the
knowledge of sign language or if
they use hearing aid in following
conversations.
Yours sincerely,
Matteo Matubarra
Trinity News apologises to Mr
Matubarra for any offense inadvertently caused - Ed
In the 6th December issue of Trinity News, SU Welfare Officer Stephanie O’Brien was quoted in
the article “College Health Service announces end to free treatment as saying that the Students’
Union “would not not oppose the charges” for the College Health Service. This was a typing
error and should have read “would not oppose the charges”. We apologise for any confusion
caused by this error.
Issue 5
Volume 58
January 24th, 2006
Intern’al Students: Alesya Krit
krita@tcd.ie
Music:
Steve Clarke
clarkesw@tcd.ie
Cinema:
Rebecca Jackson
jacksonrebecca@gmail.com
Travel:
Alix O’Neill
lixyoneill@hotmail.com
SU & Societies
Enda Hargaden
ehargade@tcd.ie
Food & Drink:
Rosie Gogan-Keogh
goganker@tcd.ie
Careers:
Myles Gutkin
gutkinm@tcd.ie
Science:
Oliver North
northo@tcd.ie
Gaeilge:
Paul Mulville
mulvillp@tcd.ie
Sport Features:
Theo O’Donnell
odonnetj@tcd.ie
Sport:
Peter Henry
pehenry@tcd.ie
TNT Team
Politics:
Derek Owens
dowens@tcd.ie
Books:
Chloe Sanderson & Klara Kubiak
sandercp@tcd.ie, kubiakk@tcd.ie
Theatre Editor:
David Lydon
lydond@tcd.ie
Fashion Editor:
Carmen Bryce
brycec@tcd.ie
Television Editor: Hannah Scally
scallyjo@tcd.ie
Photographs:
Cian Kennedy
All serious complaints can be made to:
Trinity News
DU Publications
2nd Floor
House 6
Trinity College
Dublin 2
Phone +353 1 608 2335
22
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Eagarthóir na Gaeilge: Pól Ó Maoilmhíchil
Trinity News
GAEILGE
Turas Sciála
Géaróid
Conchubhair
Ó
Ar Oidhche Chaille, chuaigh drong
ón gColáiste ar aistear iontach.
Chuamar i lig chun na Fraince ag
sciáil. Bhí thart fá chaoga daoine
ann thall sa spraoi. Bhíomar bunnaithe in aice le “Mont Blanc” sna
“hAlps”, os cionn “San Moritz” in
áit darbh ainm “Les Arc”. Mhair
on chóisir ollmhór ar feadh seachtaine. Is breá liom a rá, nár gortaíodh éinne, baill ó Dhia orainn.
Bhualamar, beagnach
don chéad uair san aerfort i mBaile
Átha Cliath, caoga dúinn ag tnúth
le craic agus comhrá. D’eitlíomar
ó Aerfort Bhaile Átha Cliath ionsar
Aerfort “Lyon”. Bhí an eitilt go
haoibheann agus níor mhair sé ach
dhá uair a chloig. Níor thairing mé
mórán giúirléidí ná trealabh liom,
de dheasca sin, bhí mo mhála
éadrom go leor, ach cara baineann
liom, bhí a málaí lán le smideadh
agus a leithéid! D’iompar sé dhá
mhála leí, gach ceann níos troime
ná mé! Mar sin, bhí orm leath a
trealaibh a ghlacadh -a leithéid de
shotal!
Taisteal
Tar éis trí uair ag taisteal
ar bhus, shroicheamar ár gceann
scríbe agus phléascamar amach
ionsar ár lóistín. Bhí ár mbrú tógtha
ar fána cnoic, bhí na dorchlaí ar fad
ar fiar! Caithfidh duine a bheith
cúramach ag taisteal dá s(h)eomra
agus é/í ar meisce tar éis oidhche
spraoiúil!
Bhí clúdach breá sneachta ar na cnocanna agus ar gach
fána. Ar Oidhche Chaille bhí cóisir
eagraithe dúinn i dteach tábhairne
áitiúil. Taobh istigh bhí cóisir
shuaithinseach ar siúl ach lasmuigh
bhí raic i mbun tarlú -troid mhór
sneachta. Bhí na hÉireannaigh in
aghaidh gach gach duine a bhí ag
dul thar bráid, ní raibh aon duine
slán, fiú na “Gendarme”- Gardaí na
Fraince, bhí siad ag breathnú go
géar orainn, ach ní raibh ach
sneachta a bhí ann!
óstán
Bhíomar lonnaithe in
óstán féin-sheirbhíseach, cúigear i
mo sheomra, ceithre bhuachaill
agus girseach aonair, in ainneoin an
measca sin, d’éireamar go hiontach
le chéile. Bhí cúldoras ár seomra
taobh le fana sneachta, bhíomar in
ann sciáil ónár seomra, chruthamar
fear sneachta mór mílteach, ba é ár
gcosantóir ar feadh ár bhfanacht.
Sna hAlps a bhíomar mar
a luaigh mé thuas, ciallaíodh sé sin
go raibh a lán sléibhte ceangailte le
chéile, chomh maith le “Mont
Blanc” fiú!
Bhí cúpla céad
ardaitheoir sciála le fáil, ardaitheoir
de gach saghas, b’fhearr liomsa an
“Telecabin”, cineál góndola a bhí
inti. D’féadfadh duine dul go dtí
aon phointe ar an sliabhraon. Bhí
bailte ná ionadaithe saoire tógtha ar
airdeanna difriúla. An Áit a bhí
muidne ná “Arc 1800”, mar is
féidir leat a thuiscint, bhíomar
1800 troigh in airde ar taobh na
cnoic.
Leaba
Bhí cóisireacha éagsúla
eagraithe dúinn chuile oidhche do
tseachtain ar théamanna éagsúla,
mar shampla “thar n-ais chun
scoile”. Shroicheamar ár leapacha
thart fá a trí gach oidhche agus inár
ndúiseacht ar a hocht chun muidne
a bheith ar na fana go luath.
Tine
Coláiste na Tríonóide - Stair
Meabhar
Is é Coláiste na Tríonóide, Baile
Átha Cliath an ollscoil is sine in
Éirinn. Tá sé suite i mBaile Átha
Cliath, agus is é an t-aon chomhcoláiste atá ann in Ollscoil Átha
Cliath.
Ba le linn do rítheaghlach na dTúdor sa Bhreatain a bheith ag leathnú a gcumhacht in Éirinn
a bunaíodh Coláiste na Tríonóide.
Bhronn bardas Bhaile Átha Cliath
tailte seanmhainistreach ar an
ollscoil, agus d'fhás sí go mear cé
go raibh an saol an-chorrach in
Éirinn sa seachtú haois déag. Mar
gheall ar na cogaí creidimh idir
Chaitlicigh, Phrotastúnaigh agus
Phreisbitéirigh bhí scoláirí á ndíbirt
agus úsáideadh an coláiste mar
bheairic d'arm rí Shéamuis II i
1689. Bhí rudaí síochánta go leor
san ochtú haois déag ach bhí corraíl ann in aimsir na nÉireannach
Aontaithe (féach Téobald Wolfe
Tone) ag deireadh na haoise sin. Ag
tús an fichiú haois rinneadh iarrachtaí láidre chun Coláiste na
Tríonóide a nascadh le Ollscoil na
hÉireann, ach d'éirigh leis a
neamhspleáchas a choinneáil.
Tosaíodh ag glacadh le
mná mar mhic léinn i 1904 agus
ceapadh an chéad bhean mar
ollamh tríocha bliain ina dhiaidh
sin.
Bunaíodh Coláiste na
Tríonóide sa bhliain 1592. Tá an
coláiste suite ar thailte seanmhainistreach i lár na cathrach.
Protastúnaigh amháin a d'fhreastail
ar an choláiste ar feadh na gcéadta
bliain,
ach
ceadaíodh
do
Chaitlicigh tosú ag staidéar ann tar
éis 1793. I measc na ndaoine cáiliúla a bhí ina mic léinn ann bhí
Téobald Wolfe Tone, Samuel
Beckett, Máire Mhic Róibín, Oscar
Wilde, agus Edward Carson. Bhí
an scríbhneoir cáiliúil Gaeilge,
Máirtín Ó Cadhain, ina Ollamh le
Gaeilge ann ar feadh scaithimh.
Ollúna le Gaeilge i gColáiste na
Tríonóide:
* Thomas F. O'Rahilly (1919-29)
* Dáithí Ó hUaithne (1955-67)
* Máirtín Ó Cadhain (1969-70)
Is sampla maith é don saghas alt
atá le fáil ar an Vicipéid, an
Chiclipéid Shaor. Is feidir leat dul
agus d’alt féin a scríobh faoi rud ar
bith ba mhaith leat, nó is feidir leat
an alt thuas a athrú freisin fiú.
Bhuel déan iarracht, cén dochar.
http://ga.wikipedia.org/
Oidhche éigean, oidhche
Dé Céadaoin a bhí ann, bhí cóisir
thar dóigh eagraithe ar ár son.
D’itheamar i mbialann darbh ainm
“L’Arpette”, a bhí ar ard 2300
troigh. Fuaireamar ardaitheoir
chuig an mbinn agus sciálamar síos
don phroinnteach. An béile, “fondue” a bhí ann. Th’éis sin, bhí DJ
fostaithe agus bhíomar ag damhsa
ar na boird agus muidne ag
caitheamh ár mbrógaí sciála. Mar a
tharla, bhriseamar ceann de na
boird agus muid ar mire ag damhsa
air! Tar éis cóisire na hoidhce sin,
sciálamar síos le lúchranna tine
inár lámhacha, “FIRE run” a
thugann siad air.
An cheist: an ndeachaigh
mé arís, don áit agus leis an
gcoláiste? Bhuel níl ann ach freagair amháin ar sin.....
Cinnte, cinnte,cinnte!!!!!!!!!!
Éigse na Trionóide 2006
Luan Mac Uaidh
Tharla Éigse na Trionóide an bhliain seo idir an 23ú lá is an 27ú lá de
mhí Eanáir. Clár iomlán a bhí ann,
a raibh rud eicint ann do chuile
dhuine.
Ar an gcéad lá, d’eagraigh na Gaeil Óga Comhdháil
Óige na Gaeilge in Amharclann
Swift. I ndiaidh sin, bhí Fáiltiú san
Atrium, a raibh Sólaistí saor in
aisce traidisiúnta ann.
Ar an Máirt, léiríodh ‘Yu
Ming is ainm dom’ agus ‘Fluent
Dysphasia’ san Amharclann Robert
Emmet le caint ó stiúrthóir an
scannáin Daniel O’Hara ina ndi-
aidh. Oíche na Mac Léinn i gClub
Chonradh na Gaeilge ar Shráid
Fhearchair. Deochanna ar €3 agus
ceol beo.
Ar an gCéadaoin, Céilí
na gContaetha
agus ‘Scoráil
Sciobtha’ sa Bhutrach. Chaith
gach daoine dathanna dá gcuid
chontae. Oíche fhiáin a bhí ann le
spotduaiseanna don scoth.
Is ar an Déardaoin a bhí
an Seisiún Mór thuas staighre sa
'Stags Head', agus bhí amhránaíocht, ceol, damhsa agus
scéalaíocht ann.
I gcás má tá ceisteanna ann faoi
aimsir an ailt seo, scríobhadh an
tseachtain seo chughainn é.
Imeachtaí Suimiúla na
Seachtaine Seo
An Cumann
Gaelach:
*Ciorcal Comhrá - Seomra an
Chumainn (Seomra 8) - Máirt
óna 7 - 9 i.n.. Is deis mhaith é
an Ciorcal Comhrá aithne a
chur ar baill eile an Chumainn
Ghaelaigh agus do chuid
Gaeilge a úsáid nó a chleachtadh ag an am céanna! Bígí
ann!
*Turas go dtí an Ghaeltacht:
27 - 29 Eanáir, 2006
*Ollchruinniú Bliantúil:
Mí Bealtaine, 2006
Club Chonradh na
Gaeilge:
*Gach Máirt - Oíche na Mac
Léinn - Ceol Beo agus gach pionta ar trí euro.
*Gach Satharn - Ceol Beo
Early Irish Society:
*Trip to Monasterboice and St.
Kilian's Centre (Facsimile of
Wurzburg
Manuscript), Mullagh - Friday,
February 10th, 2006
TradSoc:
*Seisiúin Ceol - Gach Luan ag
20:00 – An Butrach – Tar led’
uirlis
*Rangannaí Ceoil – Ag tosnú i
Mí Éanair – bodhrán agus
giotár - €3 an rang – ar
feadh 5 seachtanna – áiteanna
teoranta (8 spás i ngach rang) –
má tá suim agat,
seol r-phost chuig
tradsoc@csc.tcd.ie gan moill
Caledonian:
Dance practice (6:00 PM - 7:30
PM) learning Scottish dancing.
Run through eightsome. Gay
Gordons or reel of 51st.
Location: regent's house
An Hist:
Féach thall Díospóireacht as Gaeilge i
gCorcaigh. Duais €1,000,
urraithe ag Gael Linn.
Bainseo Bean Jo
Luan Mac Uaidh
Is iomaí amhráin ghreannmhara a
choistear ar shráideanna Bhaile
Atha Cliath. Seo sampla dóibh.
Caidé an ceann is fearr leat?
A)
Bhí bean ag Jo,
Bhí bainseo ag bean Jo,
Bhí bainseo ag Jo,
B’fhearr le Jo, Jo ar an mbainseo,
Ná bean Jo ar an mbainseo go deo
B)
Dúirt bean liom go ndúirt bean léi
Go ndúirt bean eile gur inis bean di
Go bhfaca si bean ar bharr an
tsleibhe
Agus bean nach bean ach sí-bhean í
Comórtas diospoireachta trí Ghaeilge
Beidh comórtas diospoireachta trí
Ghaeilge ar súil ar an 3ú agus ar
an 4ú la de Fheabhra i gColáiste
na hOllscoile, Corcaigh. Urraithe
ag Gael-Linn, beidh míle euro mar
dhuaiseanna ann.
Le haghaidh
ullmhúcháin do Chorcaigh, beidh
dha cheardlann diospoireachta ar
súil de Máirt 24 agus de Máirt 31
Eanair sa Seomra Achmhainne (ar
an stór is airde den GMB, in aice
le seomra na riomhairí) sa GMB
ag a 5 a chlog san iarnóin.
Tá fáilte roimh chách- is
cuma faoin gcaighdeán ghaeilge
atá agat nó scileanna
díospoireacht. Má ta suim agat
seol riomhphoist chuig Aisling:
mcniffea@tcd.ie.
Bígí ann!
There will be a debating
competition (trí gaeilge) held on
Friday the 3rd and Saturday the
4th of February in UCC.
Sponsored by Gael-Linn, there will
a 1,000 euro in prizes.
In preparation for this,
there will be two informal workshops on Tuesday 24th
and Tuesday 31st of January in
the Resource room (very top floor,
opposite computer room) in the
GMB at 5pm. All welcome, no
matter what level of Irish or
debating skills. Interested people
should contact Aisling McNiffe at
mcniffea@tcd.ie
Information provided by the Hist
- PM
Tuesday January 24, 2006
Trinity News
Editor: Alesya Krit
23
International Students
Hey guys,
Welcome back! This issue is about after-Christmas time, how did you find the first part of the year in Trinity/Ireland, how did assignments go, what’s so special in
the Dublin Christmas crack, what was it like to come back home and meet your family, friends, what are the expectations for the coming year?!
This and more to be found in this paper.
Enjoy!
Esprit irlandais, es-tu là?
The
strangest
experience with
the “Irish spirit”,
encountered by
a French student,
Daniel
Didier, who was
lost
in
the
French Alps. A
way to remind
us that we, international
students, all carry a
bit of Ireland in
our hearts.
C’aurait pu être une blague.
Voire un canular façon « surprise sur prise. » Mais non, il
s’agissait d’une simple coïncidence. Troublante, mais coïncidence quand même. Je vous
livre la situation : voici quatre
heures que nous roulons en
direction des Sauzes, petite
station de ski des Alpes du
Sud, avec pour seule perspective les paysages glacés de la
vallée de l’Ubaye. Les méandres de la départementale font
écho au silence inhumain, alors
que la température continue sa
marche rapide vers le négatif.
Le village est maintenant en
vue, ne reste plus qu’à retrouver le chemin de la ferme qui,
depuis quelques années déjà,
sert de refuge à nos pérégrinations hivernales et familiales.
Mais la voici déjà, là, presque
cachée par le panneau signalant sa présence. Esthétique
An interesting suggestion by a French Trinity student, Audrey
Gonthier, that going abroad is realizing how much you care
about some people or little things of your every day life back
at home, that you have stopped appreciating..
plaque d’immatriculation farfelue ? Je m’approche et distingue quelque hiéroglyphe : «
Dhun na nGall ». Donegal !
J’le crois pas ! Bon, à tous les
coups c’est un touriste qui
s’est perdu, et qui a trouvé
refuge dans la ferme. J’ouvre
la porte. Avec un accent reconnaissable entre mille, l’homme
m’acène un chaleureux «
bonne jouw ! » Le doute n’est
plus permis : non seulement les
nouveaux propriétaires ne sont
pas Français mais je puis maintenant affirmer avec certitude
qu’ils sont…Irlandais.
Après présentations
rapides, j’apprends que la
famille entière s’est déplacée
en France, voici trois petits
mois : il y a là les parents,
deux enfants en bas âge, et la
nounou. L’atmosphère est
détendue,
familiale
et
surtout…irlandaise. Après un
Moi qui avais passé mon temps à le chercher
là-bas, c’est en France, au creux des montagnes endormies, qu’il s’est montré.
simple, structure imposante :
l’ouvrage exhale le rural. Du
terroir français, pour sûr !
Enfin peut-être pas. Pourquoi
donc cette voiture garée près
de l’entrée a-t-elle un volant à
droite ? Et pourquoi cette
L'Auberge espagnole a
t'elle tenu ses promesses?
repas délicieux, et une fois les
enfants couchés, nous discutons dans la langue de
Shakespeare autour de l’âtre.
Et c’est là, devant le feu endormi dont les rougeoiements se
reflétaient par intermittence
dans nos verres, que l’esprit
irlandais m’est apparu. Moi qui
avais passé mon temps à le
chercher là-bas, c’est en
France, au creux des montagnes endormies, qu’il s’est
montré. Un esprit fait de bienêtre, d’une sensation étrange
de déjà-vu mélancolique mêlée
à la chaleur de la langue, des
gens, et de nos breuvages. Un
esprit simple, discret, diffus
mais à la présence rassurante.
Bizarre, vous en conviendrez. D’autant plus que ce
premier trimestre passé à
Dublin, si riche en découvertes
humaines et géographiques,
n’avait pu me permettre de
répondre à la question essentielle : de quoi était-il fait, cet
esprit tant vanté par les
Français ? Il est facile de
repérer quelques particularités
irlandaises, leur gentillesse,
l’ambiance souvent festive des
cours, l’ouverture d’esprit des
professeurs, répondant sans
faillir aux questions plus ou
moins pertinentes des étudiants, la joie qui se répand dans
les cœurs dès la porte du pub
franchie et la première bière
avalée à la hâte, leur ferveur
sportive, et, last but not least,
leurs talents de conteurs. Bien
entendu, cela ne va pas sans
une certaine superficialité et
une conscience extrêmement
développée de leur insularité.
Mais au total, rien de particulièrement excentrique. Rien
qui vous permette de répondre
sans coup férir à la traditionnelle question, lors du retour
en France : « alors, comment
sont-ils ces Irlandais ? ». En
tout cas le croyais-je, jusqu’à
ma rencontre inattendue avec
cette essence exilée pour un
temps au milieu des Alpes
françaises…
Finalement,
quelle
morale à cette historiette ?
Tous les chemins mènent en
Irlande ? Chassez l’Irlande,
elle revient au galop ? Non, je
crois que le Destin a simplement voulu nous prévenir : ne
tentez pas de l’oublier, sans
quoi elle vous rattrapera, votre
nouvelle
fibre
irlandaise.
L’esprit irlandais, celui que
l’étranger cherche, tant bien
que mal, à saisir au bond entre
deux discussions autour d’une
pinte de bière, s’exprime le
mieux dans l’absence de conscience. Ne tentez pas de l’apprivoiser, de le dompter.
Laissez-le venir à vous, faire
son chemin dans votre esprit,
et vous comprendrez enfin
pourquoi l’Irlande est en vous,
là, quelque part. Comme une
quête sens dessus dessous, où
pour atteindre le graal, le
chevalier doit lui tourner le
dos.
Parce que la nouvelle année est
toujours propice au bilan, une
petite réflexion sur le trimestre
précédent s'imposait avant de
repartir pour de nouvelles aventures!
Afin d’éviter toute
phrase qui son creux, je ne dirais
pas que le temps passe trop vite.
Voilà qui est dit! Toute rentrée
scolaire porte en elle de nombreuses questions et parfois de
grandes espérances. Pourtant, je
vous dirais que je ne savais absolument pas quoi attendre de ce premier trimestre à Trinity College.
De fait, venir étudier pendant un
an ici dans le cadre de ce que mon
école appelle « l’année d’ouverture » tient beaucoup plus de
l’aventure que du voyage organisé. Aussi, je préférais ne m’attendre à rien de particulier et voir sur
place. Je dois vous avuer que cela
n’a pas été facile tous les jours au
départ et que l’Auberge Espagnole
n’est rien de plus q'une fiction
qu’il faut cesser de mythifier.
Cependant, la découverte d’un
nouveau pays, d’une autre culture,
et n’avoir autour de moi que des
visages inconnus au début, a
autant été synonyme de passages à
vide que de nombreux moments
de joie. Aussi, je peux affirmer
avec certitude qu’en ce qui me
concerne, j’ai vraiment apprécié
cette énorme bâtisse qui fait partie
de ce « chef d’œuvre » d’architecture moderne que représente le Art
building…, J’ai nommé la bibliothèque…
J’étais
tellement
heureuse de trouver (enfin) le livre
que je cherchais que je l’ai honteusement réquisitionné trop
longtemps…sorry (to be said with
an outrageaous French accent!)
d’où les premières amendes. Aussi
étrange que cela puisse paraître
pour certains, tout ces légers aléas
représentent finalement des bons
moments pour la simple raison
qu’ils font partie intégrante de la
Partir […] c’est se découvrir soi même […]
c’est s’apercevoir de son attachement aux
choses, aux gens […] En fait, partir c’est
grandir un peu.
construction d’un nouveau quotidien, à la fois stable et mouvant,
au sein duquel des liens d’amitié
se sont tissés, des réseaux cosmopolites se sont crées, et tout
cela dans la cadre d’un établissement qui non seulement est un lieu
de formation intellectuelle mais
aussi un endroit d’épanouissement
personnelle et de socialisation du
fait de toutes les associations que
Trinity abritent.
N’oublions pas non plus
la ville elle même, Dublin, avec
Venir étudier pendant un an ici dans le cadre
de ce que mon école appelle « l’année d’ouverture » tient beaucoup plus de l’aventure que
du voyage organisé.
ce premier trimestre à l’étranger.
Comme d’autres « visiting students », il a été marqué par
les premiers essais à rendre…en
retard parfois…! Ce qui donc par
la même occasion permet de faire
la connaissance du Head of
Department de la matière concernée. De même, comme beaucoup d’étudiants, il a également
fallu que je me familiarise avec
sans qu’il y est une « Christmas
party »! A dire vrai, le pourquoi de
la chose m’est toujours plus ou
moins obscur. Bref, de quoi nous
donner des heures de sommeil à
rattraper une fois rentrés à la maison. Et oui, car il le fallait bien, et
s’il était difficile de m’arracher ne
serait ce que momentanément à
ma vie dublinoise, force est de
constater que retrouver mon foyer,
ma famille, mes ami(e)s, m’a permis de me régénérer et de
partager. Pourtant, un étrange sentiment de manque, que d’autres
ont peut être ressenti, persistait…
ses pubs et son ambiance festive
contrebalaçant sa grisaille et son
froid hivernal, qui offre de nombreuses possibilités de se divertir,
ce qui est non négligeable quand
on est Erasmus…!! D’ailleurs, il
est assez remarquable de constater
à quel point toute fête est l’occasion d’au moins une semaine de
soirées. Vous souvenez vous de
Noël? Pas une journée ou presque
La formule dit que les voyages
forment la jeunesse, et pour
cause…
...Partir, ce n’est pas
seulement apprendre sur les
autres, c’est aussi se découvrir soi
même; Partir, c’est s’apercevoir
de son attachement aux choses, au
gens qui font notre vie de tous les
jours sans même plus que l’on
s’en rende compte; En fait, partir
c’est grandir un peu. Aussi, ce
manque expérimenté n’est autre
que celui que l’on éprouve quand
on doit s’arrêter de lire un livre
sans connaître la fin de l’aventure.
Et parce que cette année est en
devenir, on a envie de savoir ce
qu’il va se passer. Ainsi, si je dois
formuler une attente pour les
trimestres à venir, ce serait tout
simplement que la richesse des
rapports humains que j’ai perçue à
travers mes rencontres soit toujours aussi grande, et même plus
encore, et de trouver une jolie
dernière ligne à mon histoire
dublinoise. Quand à ce qui est des
résolutions pour cette nouvelle
année 2006, j’ai justement décidé
d’arrêter d'en prendre! Et vous?
Het Erasmus Effect
A Dutch Trinity student, Lieke Boersma, shares a shocking “coming back to
Netherlands” experience, which involved getting lost in her mother's house in
the middle of the night. What else can a half-year in Trinity bring? Some afterparty syndrome, a bit of an Irish accent and some stories about Dubliners, who
shop before Christmas like their lives depend upon it, are to be discussed.
Terug in Nederland zijn
na drie maanden was een aparte
ervaring. Steeds dacht ik, hé die
mensen praten Nederlands! Goh,
misschien komt dat wel doordat
we in Nederland zijn. Ik moest
dus wel even wennen aan mijn
nieuwe omgeving. Vooral de
eerste nacht bij mijn moeder thuis
was verwarrend toen ik wakker
werd en helemaal in paniek raakte omdat ik het toilet niet kon vinden. Ik waande me nog steeds in
mijn kamertje in Dublin. Toen ik
mij de volgende morgen wilde
room. Het resultaat hiervan was
dus dat ik in Nederland aankwam
met een koffer vol met cadeautjes, zonder dat er, hoe hard ik ook
zocht, ook maar een enkel bruikbaar kledingstuk in te vinden was.
Vervolgens ga je eens
denken over de afgelopen maanden en wat je zo allemaal gedaan
hebt. Een van de belangrijkste
dingen is dat ik ontzettend veel
mensen heb ontmoet van verschillende nationaliteiten. Dublin is
echt een stad met culturele diversiteit wat het een heel gezellige
[…] neem Ieren niet mee naar een Ierse
giftshop want je komt er nooit meer weg.
aankleden kwam ik erachter dat
mijn koffer toch wel erg leeg was.
Dit was veroorzaakt door het
“naar een feestje gaan de avond
voordat je moet vliegen” synd-
sfeer geeft. Aangezien ik in
Nederland was heb ik helaas niet
alles meegekregen van de kerstsfeer. Wat me echter altijd bij zal
staan is de belachelijke, bijna
beangstigende hoeveelheid knipperende lichtjes en de kuddes
Ieren die je met een glazige blik
en grote shoppingbags onder hun
neer elke keer dat je iets zegt
iedereen begint te lachen.
Verder was iedereen
heel erg blij met de cadeautjes uit
Als ik tegen een medestudent over essays
of boeken lezen begin word ik vol afschuw
aangekeken alsof ik twee hoofden heb.
armen omver lopen.
De kerst in Nederland
was behoorlijk sneeuwerig en ook
vooral erg gezellig. Mijn moeders
vriend is Engels en we vierden de
kerst met hem en zijn zus. Ik was
er al bang voor, maar zodra ik
mijn mond open deed heerste er
hilariteit alom. Gelijk werd er
geroepen “Aaaahhh, je hebt een
Iers accent! Wat lief!” Helemaal
niet lief. De rest van de avond heb
ik geen woord Engels meer
gesproken. Het is niet dat ik niet
trots ben op mijn “Ierse” accent,
maar het is nogal frustrerend wan-
Ierland. Die ik braaf had uitgezocht uit een van de 100 giftshops
die Dublin telt. Dat was ook nog
een avontuur apart. Ik ging naar
een giftshop met twee Ieren. Het
zijn verder twee ontzettend leuke
mensen, maar mijn advies is:
neem Ieren niet mee naar een
Ierse giftshop want je komt er
nooit meer weg. Terwijl ik verwoede pogingen deed om een zo
normaal
mogelijk
uitziend
cadeautje uit een hoop (laten we
het netjes houden) “prul” te vissen werd het een na het andere
onder mijn neus geduwd, “en
deze mooie Guinness stropdasspeld dan? Of deze-totaal nutteloze met vier verschillende
standen-dansende
kabouter
dan?!” Toen ik mij uiteindelijk
tevreden stelde met een paar
Guinness glazen werd ik
afkeurend aangekeken: “Lieke,
you could’ve just taken those
from the pub, you know.” Had ik
dan helemaal niets geleerd van de
Ieren?! Kennelijk niet. En ik maar
denken dat Nederlanders gierig
zijn.
Weer aangekomen in
Dublin voelde ik me eigenlijk al
heel snel weer op mijn gemak. De
internationale studenten feestjes
gaan natuurlijk gewoon weer
verder alsof er nooit een kerst
vakantie is geweest. Ik kwam er
wel achter dat ik de enige ben die
ook maar enigszins iets van
“werk” gedaan heeft. Als ik tegen
een medestudent over essays of
boeken lezen begin word ik vol
afschuw aangekeken alsof ik twee
hoofden heb. Kennelijk heb ik de
Erasmus mentaliteit toch nog niet
helemaal door, maar gelukkig heb
ik nog vier hele maanden om hem
onder de knie te krijgen.
And the last thing...
In the next issue we will try to find the best place in Ireland to go on a weekend trip. I’m sure that you’ve done thousands of them so far and have some sufficient
experience to share. Please do so via cell 0851495979 or by mail krita@tcd.ie and leave your article before the 12th of February. If you don’t have any so far - don’t forget
to pick up a next issue in week 6 of this term and find it out, to enjoy the rest of your stay here in Ireland. If any questions occur to you, please don’t hesitate to contact.
Take care,
Alesya.
24 Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Science Editor: Oliver North
Trinity News
SCIENCE
The Case for Carbon Taxes
Louise Cargin examines the fallout of Kyoto’s failure
and the possibility of taxing carbon dioxide emissions
The case for carbon taxes in Ireland
has never been stronger. The
growth of industry in this country
has brought about huge changes for
it’s people. Living standards have
improved; in fact, quality of life for
the Irish has reached an all time
high. Even those living on benefits
have fridges, washing machines,
central heating and cars. A far cry
from the impoverished living conditions that so many in this country
suffered as little as twenty years
ago. So, on the surface, it would
seem that the Irish people are winning. But what is the price of the
Celtic tigers roar? The price, fellow
citizens, is our lifeline; it is the very
air we breathe. As a result of industrialization, millions of tons of
harmful emissions are churned out
into Ireland’s atmosphere every
year.
The country as a whole
may be considered relatively free
of air pollution, when compared to
many of our European counterparts. Nonetheless at the rate we
are going, Ireland will lose its
‘green’ reputation and serious
problems for all in this country will
ensue. We as a nation are contributing to the climate change that is
global warming. This is possibly
the greatest potential human crisis
in recorded history. Can it really be
such a great threat to mankind?
Yes. Are we taking adequate steps
to address the problem? Let’s take
a look.
In ratifying the Kyoto
Protocol of 1997, Ireland has committed to reducing harmful emissions to 13% above 1990 levels by
the year 2012. We are not on the
track to fulfilling this commitment.
Actually it is predicted that we will
overshoot the target by 25%.
Carbon Dioxide (CO2), accounts
for approximately 50% of global
warming. Yet instead of decreasing
carbon dioxide emissions, Ireland’s
emissions are rising, and rising rapidly. Originally carbon taxes were
to be introduced in this country in
the year 2000, as part of a comprehensive strategy to curb emissions
and reach our Kyoto target.
Concerns about international competitiveness are the basis of governmental failure to draft and
implement carbon taxes that would
significantly reduce the amount of
CO2 Ireland is responsible for producing. In 2002, the idea of introducing such taxes was abandoned
altogether.
These taxes would have
to be levied not just on industry, but
on every sector of the economy, for
all sectors are involved in energy
consumption. In fact the most
pressing air pollution problem in
this country has been identified as
smoke levels in Dublin, a substantial amount of these emitted by the
burning of coal in household fires.
Approximately one million tons of
CO2 arise from household electricity generation in Dublin each year.
Add to this the vast amounts of
motor exhaust emissions… .the list
goes on. The very mention of carbon taxes sparks the fear of financial loss in many people. Were they
introduced; at a proposed rate of 20
euro per ton; the government
would receive in or around the
region of an extra 850 million euro
each year. But what would the ramifications of such measures be to
the Irish citizen? It has been estimated that the average household
would pay about 246 euro per
annum in the form of carbon taxes.
Ranging from 157 euro for those in
the lowest socio-economic classes,
to 336 euro for those in the highest.
This may seem like a sizable loss to
the casual observer, but let us consider the impacts in more detail.
Firstly it must be remembered that
this money would stay within the
country. It would be received by
the Irish government in the form of
revenue. In turn, this money could
be returned to the Irish people in
the form of subsidies for such
things as housing and education.
Other taxes could be reduced also,
leveling revenue amounts. Taking
this into account, previous losses
incurred seem somewhat superficial. Secondly, it is important to
note that taxes would not be introduced suddenly. Implication of
such measures would be gradual
enough to allow us to accommodate them without major disruption
to our financial lives. Losses will
only be suffered if we fail to make
necessary changes in adjusting to
new prices. Thirdly, the country
will save money that would otherwise be lost as a result of not meeting our Kyoto target. If trends proceed as predicted, Ireland will end
up paying just about 600 million as
a result of being so far over its
limit. Carbon taxes would reduce
the estimated overshoot by up to a
third, thus considerably reducing
this figure. Carbon taxes are a sure
way to reduce carbon emissions.
Any economist will tell you that
when confronted with price
changes people do change their
consumption pattern; and this is
paramount to reducing carbon
emissions and reaching our Kyoto
target.
Concentrating on the
short-term financial impact of carbon taxes on society, is really
neglecting the core issue here. We
in Ireland have a golden chance to
make changes now that will save us
from environmental calamity in
years to come. Food security and
health top the list of potential disaster areas if appropriate steps are not
taken to stabilize levels of harmful
emissions in our atmosphere. Most
of these emissions (including CO2)
contain high levels of many dioxins. These are immensely harmful,
carcinogenic substances, poisonous
to almost all known organisms.
Breathing these substances into our
lungs, risks of such illnesses as
lung cancer, cardiovascular disease
The Answer is
Blowing in the
Wind
Coal miners: even more fed up of carbon than the rest of us
and emphysema are significantly
increased; that is to name just a
few. Furthermore, dioxins infiltrate
water supplies and contaminate
soil. Degrading soils and deteriorating water sources will place
huge strains on food security.
These carcinogenic dioxins have a
nasty habit of collecting and concentrating in animal fats. In some
high-dioxin areas in the USA,
farmers have been banned from
selling their produce because prod-
ucts such as milk, cheese and eggs
contained levels of dioxins deemed
‘toxic’ by food regulatory authorities. Granted, these cases are
extreme, but I put it to you: Is this
predicament, or anything remotely
like it, what we want to see happen
in this country? In country that
relies as heavily on the dairy industry as we do, the answer is surely
no, no way. What would your reaction be if I told you that in some
such areas, mothers were advised
ready and waiting for the Irish consumer. Who then is willing to hop
on the wind wagon and utilize the
power this technology has to offer?
The chief drawback of
renewables, according to the latest
edition of The Economist, is their
cost compared with conventional
energy sources. The cost of generating electricity from wind turbines
is at least 5 cents per kilowatt hour
(kWh) while conventional sources
are generally lower between 3 and
5 cents per kWh. These costs in
cents refer to the amount of money
paid by utility companies, for
example, to receive 1 kWh of ener-
Turbines: The solution to all life’s problems or just
glorified windmills?
gy generated by wind farms.
1Kwh is approximately the electricity used by an electric cooker
plate in one hour. Sources such as
Sustainable Energy Ireland indicate the maximum cost of wind
power to be 5.216 €c/kWh, however, in addition there are costs to
human health and the environment
that are not reflected in the price of
electricity. The EU’s ExternE project rates the external costs of wind
energy at 0.26€cper kWh compared with up to 15 €c/kWh for
some coal fired generation. The
brunt of pollution attributed to unclean energy such as in the case of
many coal powered plants is taken
by society through increased medical and insurance costs, degradation of the environment and impact
on tourism. The Irish, among the
Spanish, Chinese, Americans,
Germans and others recognize this
and have supported using wind turbines.
Ten kilometers off the
Arklow coast lays a shallow-water
sandbank where seven newly erected GE 3.6-megawatt turbine
machines produce energy from the
wind which is then fed into the
national electricity grid. (The
Arklow bank is soon to be viewed
at 52N 6W when the lads at Google
Earth take some higher resolution
photos). The Arklow bank project
was a joint venture by General
Electric and local Irish company
Airtricity. Airtricity are the prominent Irish wind power company
who claim they have saved the
release of 2,074,084 Tonnes of
needed to push other measures into
motion. Ireland has reached an
environmental crossroads. What
lies ahead depends on what we
choose to prioritize. We should not
fear or criticize any plan to introduce these taxes; rather, we should
embrace and support such action. It
will greatly aid in creating the kind
of future we all want to see.
The Question We’re Asking This Week:
What if Schrodinger had put
something else
in his box?
Schrodinger’s cat, some might say
quantum physics’ most famous
cat, is a theoretical demonstration
of quantum theory’s principal of
superposition. The thought experiment, invented by Erwin
Schrodinger in 1935 goes like
this: A cat is put, rather inhumanely, in a box with a vial of poison,
into which we cannot see. The
chances that the vial will release
its poison killing the cat are exactly evens, with no way of knowing
whether it has done so until the
box is opened. Quantum theory
states that until the box is opened
the sorry feline exists in a sort of
limbo, both alive and dead, in a
superposition of states. It is only
when the box is opened that the
superposition is lost and the cat
becomes either alive or dead.
Patrick Dustin looks at the benefits of wind power
How many technological innovations remain locked away in a hidden vault waiting until the world is
ready? It’s easy to imagine computer developers not only thinking
into the future but having already
developed processors, for example,
which are beyond our time and
remain in the pipeline until the consumer can handle what is not yet on
offer. Energy from innovations in
the field of wind power, however,
is already up for grabs as the ability to harness the power of the wind
has been thoroughly developed
over the last decade. Energy from
wind power has arrived on scene
not to breastfeed their babies?
Anyone can see that there is something drastically wrong here.
Today, Ireland can pride itself on
having one of the lowest levels of
dioxins in the world. Lets do all we
can to keep it that way.
Of course, carbon taxes
are not the only measures needed to
curb emissions and slow or halt the
national and global crisis we are
facing. They would be however,
the strongest motivating factor
But what would’ve happened if Schrodinger had been an
animal rights activist, and decided
to build a somewhat larger box
into which he put, rather than his
beloved moggy, say, consistently
overrated 17th century frenchman
Rene Descartes? “Aaaah” the
deeply insecure but massively pretentious Rene would say “Aaaah.
Cogito Ergo Sum. Aahaah”. And
would hence disprove quantum
theory. This would, according to
renowned sociopath and Quantum
Physicist Olivia Floyer-Acland,
“Undermine the laws that govern
the matter of space, causing the
universe to implode and Christ to
come again. I hate cats”
Rene Descartes, looking smug
CO2 into the atmosphere since 1st
January 2003. (This is equivalent
to taking 493,829 cars off the road
for a year!) And the average consumer can buy electricity from
these people?? It seems the answer
is a simple yes and they provide
both commercial and residential
supply. So, clean renewable energy is available in Ireland and awaiting the discerning consumer.
Companies such as
Airtricity are willing to invest in
the technology and remain competitive and consumer confidence in
this new source of energy is growing. As more and more consumers
choose wind energy, funding for
more turbines and technology will
improve and in turn this will benefit the consumer. So if residents
accept the look of wind turbines
dotted around the countryside then
wind power looks set to take hold.
According to Sustainable Energy
Ireland, if Ireland adopts a policy
to provide 30% of electricity from
renewable sources by 2020 the
benefits may include the provision
of electricity for two million homes
and the creation of 1500 new jobs.
With recent rises in oil
price, concerns about the future of
fossil fuels and a better awareness
of the impact our energy needs
have on the environment, both government and consumer have realized the benefit of climbing on
board the wind wagon. Whether
the wind turbine is the ultimate
solution remains to be seen, but for
now it’s a solution that is both useful and competitive.
Whales Not as
Clever as Dolphins
Shock
A whale was sighted swimming up
the Thames river in central London
on Friday the 21st of January.
Although the whale declined an
interview with Trinity News
Science’s team of roving reporters
it has been rumoured that the whale
had come to London to see the
queen. Efforts from the most silver-tongued of marine biologists
had, at the time of going to press,
failed in persuading the whale to
turn around. And although the
BBC news website talks optimistically of a rescue effort involving “a
system of pontoons”, this is their
answer to many of the world’s
problems and has rarely worked in
the past. Scientists have speculated
that the whale will probably not
survive its once-in-a-lifetime pilgrimage, and have blasted its decision as foolish and the final evidence that whales are “effectively
big stupid dolphins”.
Sports Features Editor: Theo O’Donnell
Tuesday January 24th, 2006
Trinity News
SPORTS
25
FEATURES
BO’D Keen To Answer Ireland’s Call
Captain and key player Brian O’Driscoll will be desperate to lead his Ireland side to victory in this year’s Six
Nations tournament following his absence from the
Autumn Internationals last November.
After a miserable autumn series,
Irish rugby fans have much to celebrate with impressive provincial
performances in the Celtic League
and Heineken Cup and the return to
form and fitness of captain and outside-centre Brian O'Driscoll.
O'Driscoll was sorely
missed against New Zealand and
Australia, but has looked to be on
his best form following his return
for Leinster, and this weekend
scored an impressive try and created two more against Bath to help
lead the province to the Quarterfinals of the competition.
Michael
Cheika,
Leinster’s head coach, was effusive
in his praise of O’Driscoll after the
Bath match, citing his immense
professionalism and commitment
to making a full recovery before
testing his match-fitness in a competitive environment. Cheika also
sent out a warning to other sides in
the Six Nations, stating that he felt
sorry for anyone who had to mark
the Blackrock College man when
playing as he is now.
O’Driscoll’s enforced
absence over the autumn from a
very nasty shoulder operation,
necessitated by the infamous
‘spear-tackle’ incident against the
All Blacks in July saw Ireland desperately lacking leadership and
attacking nous, though it is true
that debutant Andrew Trimble
impressed as his replacement and
should feature in the side this
spring.
Trimble will be competing with the likes of well-established players Gordon D’Arcy and
Shane Horgan for a spot alongside
O’Driscoll in the backline.
One possibility for
O’Sullivan to solve his newfound
midfield selection quandry would
be to move D’Arcy to the wing to
partner Shane Horgan, Denis
Hickie or Tommy Bowe, though it
has been from centre that the
Leinsterman has made the greatest
impact. John Kelly is back in the
squad, and will also be competing
for a wing berth, and together with
out-half Jeremy Staunton he has
been given the opportunity to belatedly kick-start an international
career.
Ireland start their campaign with a match they ought to
win, but which is becoming more
challenging by the year, against
Italy at Lansdowne Road on the 4th
of February.
“The return of former
captain Lawrence
Dallaglio will be a
trump card for an
England team seeking to bore their
opponents to death”
Paul O'Connell, the ginger Martin Johnson of Munster also
makes a welcome return from
injury, and with Munster’s cureent
form should help to bolster a pack
that struggled to assert itself
against Southern Hemisphere
opposition. Denis Hickie is injuryfree as well, and Ireland will be
pleased to see the man vying with
O'Driscoll for the honour of leading try-scorer back in contention
for a green jersey.
Jamie Heaslip, who won
an All-Ireland medal with Trinity
Under 20s is also included in the
squad as one of four uncapped
players, along with his Leinster
team-mate Rob Kearney. Heaslip
will be hoping to win his first international cap after coming away
from the Autumn series without
clocking up any playing time,
despite showing consistently good
form throughout the Celtic League
and Heineken Cup and starring for
Irish representative teams at underage level.
The other uncapped
players in the squad are the lightning quick Wasps scrum-half Eoin
Reddan and the hard-working and
aggressive Shane Jennings of
Leicester.
Many
considered
Jennings extremely unfortunate not
to have been picked in the squad
for the autumn matches against
Australia, Romania and the All
Blacks, though he still faces stiff
competition for a place in the backrow from the likes of David
Wallace and Dennis Leamy, both
on excellent form for Munster, but
O'Sullivan should really look to
give the former Leinster player
some competitive international
experience soon.
The big news as far as
other Six Nations squad selections
goes is the return of Lawrence
Dallaglio to international rugby.
One of the most irritating players
of all time, he will certainly be a
trump card for an England team
seeking to bore their opponents to
death with their unique brand of
misery-inducing conservative play,
despite the abundant talent, breathtaking flair and attacking skills of
English backs like Hodgson and
Lewsey.
For Wales, the outrageously long suspension of Gavin
Henson for two realtively harmless
incidents, combined with Sonny
Parker's retirement from international rugby and Tom Shanklin's
career-threatening knee injury
leaves them with huge holes to fill
in the midfield before their opening
clash with England at Twickenham
on February 4th.
Full Six Nations updates will follow in the next issue of Trinity
News
The return of Captain and talismanic figure Brian O’Driscoll will be a huge boost to an Ireland side in desperate need of a resurgence in form in this year’s Six Nations.
Rugby And Soccer
Cross Over The Liffey
Computer Graphic depicting a view from inside the new-look Lansdowne Road
The GAA have, at long last, overcome their own prejudice and succumbed to pressure from the government in allowing Croke Park to
be used as a venue for rugby and
football matches during the redevelopment of Lansdowne Road
next year.
The 82,300 capacity stadium will make an ideal foster
home for non-gaelic sports over the
next two or three years, starting
with Ireland's 2007 Six Nations
match against France. The GAA
apparently insisted that Croke
Park's first rugby match could not
involve English teams as a result of
its bloody history, though England
will be the second team to face
Ireland at the venue.
The match-fee payable
by the IRFU to the GAA is
rumoured to have been around
€1.5million, and though no decisions have been reached over the
future of non-gaelic games at
Croke Park after the completion of
Lansdowne Road, it is hard to see
either organisation giving up the
increased revenue that will come
from at least five international
matches per year being played in a
stadium of such capacity.
The FAI, Ireand's soccer
Association, has reached a similar
agreement, allowing them access to
Croke Park for at least three internationals in 2007. IRFU chief executive Philip Browne said the agreement was a "significant milestone
in Irish sport" and FAI chief executive John Delaney described it as
"historic".
This ends an extremely
sorry and xenophobic chapter in
the history of Irish sport, and it is
unfortunate that it took what was
essentially an enormous cash bribe
from the government for the GAA
to bring about such a change.
Hopefully the three Irish
official bodies, which between
them govern this island's four most
popular sports, will be able to put
aside their ludicrous prejudices and
commit to a lasting agreement that
will not only benefit all parties
involved financially but will also
be doing a huge favour for Irish
sport and its fans.
An ongoing rental agreement of some kind between the
organisations would leave Ireland
with two world-class venues for
field sports once Lansdowne Road
is completed, a situation that would
certainly be in everyone’s interests,
as it would provide far more versatility in terms of scheduling, preventing any potential clashes
between football and soccer matches, and reducing pressure on overburdened groundstaff to keep
pitches in top-class condition
throughout wet and muddy winters.
Moving bigger matches
to Croke Park, for instance any
Ireland vs England clashes (sure to
be emotive occassions in such a
stadium), whilst keeping smaller
matches at Lansdowne Road would
also heap to alleviate the massive
shortfall in ticket supply to events
like soccer World Cup qualifiers
and Six Nations matches.
Another benefit would be
the increased likelihood that
Ireland could win bids to host or
co-host high profile sporting tournaments and festivals, which
would not only help boost the
economy and raise Ireland’s international profile, but which would
crucially bring in much needed revenue to support the playing of sport
at development and youth levels.
If Croke Park were made
a viable venue, you can be sure that
Ireland would be hosting a significantly larger number of events like
the Heineken Cup Final or
Champions League Final than is
currently the case.
One factor that the GAA
also seem to have overlooked is
that very few people outside
Ireland actually know about Croke
Park’s very existence, and those
that do have little respect for the
sporting body which was refusing
to allow national teams in need of a
new home to avoid going overseas
to Cardiff or elsewhere for home
games.
Whilst the GAA maintained that they were supporting
Gaelic games by restricting access,
they were in fact harming the
image of the sports outside Ireland.
Nothing will improve the chances
of hurling and football becoming
more popular more than their newfound attatchment to an international sport like rugby and a truly
global one like soccer.
As the great George
Hook (see article , right) said,
“Munster vs. Perpignan. At Croke
Park. Taoiseach, take that down.”
George Hook Goes
A Little Bit Mental
It is clear to most impartial
observers that George Hook is just
a little bit crazy. On Saturday 21st
January he confirmed everyone’s
long-standing suspicions, and in
true over-excitable sports pundit
fashion, he went just a little bit
mental.
Understandably upset
about RTE’s loss of the Heineken
Cup broadcasting rights to
SkySports, Hook appeared at
RTE’s broadcasting box at
Thomond Park wearing a morose
expression, and dark funeral suit
with black tie, all finished off with
a black armband to mourn the pass-
Thomond Park and its atmospehere
and history. Not likely.
At this stage, obviously
worried about being outdone by his
fellow pundit, Brent Pope decided
to weigh in with his own decalration of indignation, citing his many
enjoyable post-match experiences
in the bars and pubs of Limerick as
testament to his respect for
Munster’s rugby culture. He
alsmost seemed to have a tear in
his eye as he recalled the “sixteen
wonderful years” he had spent
coming down to Thomond Park,
and no one can doubt the truth of
such a statement. Quite why he
The incredible Hook: Don’t make him angry, you
wouldn’t like him when he’s angry...
ing of European rugby’s knockout
stages from terrestrial television.
When questioned live on
air about his admittedly eyecatching appearance, Hook began a (justified) rant about what the ERC
have done to Irish sports fans.
“The ERC have sold
Irish rugby’s heritage down the
river,” seemed to be a favourite
mantra of the intransigeant Hook,
and he angrily repeated it several
times, demanding to know whether
the likes of Stuart Barnes or anyone else on SkySports’ rugby panel
knew as much as he did about
should stop at sixteen just because
RTE won’t be paying him anymore
seems like a petulant question.
Despite the hyperbole,
these impassioned arguments in
favour of an Irishman’s right to
watch free sport in his own home
are admirable, but Georgey should
perhaps have stopped just short of
requesting that Stephen Spielberg
collaberate with the (deceased)
Cecil B. DeMilo to direct a film
about Munster’s breathtaking victory over Sale. Well done, Hooky.
26 Tuesday 24th January, 2006
Sports Features Editor: Theo O’Donnell
Trinity News
SPORTS
FEATURES
Pharaohs Off To Flying Start In
African Cup Of Nations
Gadafi’s boys were no match for the pride of the Pharoahs as the hosts of the 2006 Tournament start brilliantly in front
of home fans and build a clear lead at the top of Group A
Egypt, hosts of this years African
Cup of Nations, took all three
points from the opening match of
the tournament when they played
Libya at Cairo International
Stadium.
Egypt managed to put a
poor build-up to the tournament
behind them in overcoming a
Libyan side that was down to ten
men, and doing so in some style.
Having previously lost away at
Libya in the World Cup qualifiers
in a run which also saw them concede two games to footballing minnows The Ivory Coast, a victory in
front of home fans will be a massive boost to a team that desperately needs to rediscover some form.
Playing in front of the
President of Egypt, as well as many
other leading Egyptian digniatries,
they established a good lead in the
17th minute through Tottenham’s
Ahmed “Mido” Hossam. Just five
minutes later a stunning thirty yard
free kick from Mohamed Aboutrika
had all but guarenteed the win for
the Pharoahs before half-time.
Libya started the second
half well, pushing Egypt while the
hosts seemed prepared to sit back,
but eventually over-eagreness got
the better of them, and a series of
reckless challenges saw goalkeeper
Luis de Agustini sent off. Having
blatantly hauled down Mohamed
Barakat, the African Footballer of
the Year, inside the Libyan box, de
Agustini ensured that his replacements first duty on the pitch was to
face the hungry boot of Mido as he
took the ensuing penalty.
Muftah Ghazalla made
an impressive save, but was unable
to stop the rebounded shot by
Ahmed Hassan. A three goal lead
against ten men on home ground
was the sort of advantage that even
a characteristically lazy team like
Serbia & Montenegro couldn’t
manage to throw away, and the
Egyptians duly finished the match
as winners by three goals to nil.
The incredibly tight
security at the game was rumoured
to be as a result of an alleged
appearance by Colnel Muammar
Gadafi himself, but if Libya’s leading proponent of dapper militarychic was in the stands, he was
keeping an unusually low profile.
Gadafi could be forgiven for
remaining incognito if he was
indeed present, so lacklustre was
the performance of his national
side.
The hosts will gain great
confidence from this stylish win,
particularly in light of the impressive performances from the likes of
Mido, who showed he is just as
cool and calm with the boot as he is
in the air. Barakat also put in a fine
display, and is set to be one of the
stars of the tournament. If Egypt
can maintain this momentum
through key clasehs with Group A
rivals Ivory Coast and Morocco,
then their progression throughout
the tournament will be a formality.
Morocco have been terribly inconsistent of late and need a
good run in the tournament in order
to re-establish themselves on the
world stage after a miserable run
that saw them fail to qualify for this
year’s World Cup in Germany.
The Ivory Coast side are
deperate to reimpose their name
amongst the elite African nations
after a decade and a half of obscurity since their last major tournament victory in 1992. Whether or
not they can do so will almost certaily be decided by their group
match against Morocco, and the
players will be desperate to avoid
aother early and embarrassing
flight home, which last time earned
them the dubious pleasure of a formal visit from the commander-inchief of Ivory Coast’s army.
Cameroon are undoubtedly the team to beat in Group B,
and anything less than a semi-final
spot for this proud footballing
nation will be a massive disappointment. Tunisia look likely to
emerge as the leaders of Group C,
and are another nation that look
certain to make the semi-finals. In
Group D it is Nigeria who are likely to dominate, but it would be
foolish to totally write off Senegal,,
who easily have the talent, if not
the current form, to go all the way.
It should be a terrific
tournament, and anyone keen to
take a look at some of the emerging
sides of African football prior to
Germany 2006 would do well to
follow its inevitable twists and
turns closely.
Jay Jay Okocha is set to be a star of the 2006 African
Cup of Nations, and could well be key to a Nigerian
victory in the tournament
Fairytales on the Fields of Dreams
Andrew Payne
Fairytale stuff - every year around
this time the old football cliché is
taken off the shelf, dusted down
and rolled out for the FA Cup third
round. The big guns join the fray
and the cameras travel down to a
small English town where a bunch
of part-timers, plying their trade as
plumbers or electricians most of
the week, take on a team of
Premiership superstars (that, or a
side of reserve players and youngsters aspiring to be superstars). The
cameras come in, the amateurs get
90 minutes in the spotlight and then
just as quickly as it began it's all
over, the television rights and ensuing financial stability the only sign
that the match ever happened to the
outside world. For the fans and
players however the occasion of
some of the world's best taking to
the field and playing the local boys
is something to cherish forever.
This year's third round
provided more evidence than ever
that this dream is still alive. The triumph of Greece in the 2004
European Championships is held
aloft meanwhile that even at the
very top, fairytales happen. This
would be a wonderful case but
often it is not true. While Burton
Albion and Nuneaton Burrough
can proudly lay claim to well
earned draws, in reality these
games were not what they seemed.
While the Burton players and fans
got half an hour of Rooney and
Ronaldo, for the most part they
were treated to a reserve side made
up of players who in some cases,
such as that of Richie Jones, they
would be forgiven for never having
heard of. While the image of
Rooney signing shirts for his opposition was a memorable one, the
likes of van Nistelrooy, Giggs and
even Gary Neville were nowhere to
be seen.
While the trip to Old
Trafford for the replay is something
the Burton players will treasure and
something indeed worthy of the
attention it's given (despite the 5-0
result), recent times have seen the
false championing of many wouldbe fairytales. Take for instance
Greece's victory. While it's impossible to criticise the Greek people
for their joy, the Greek squad was
made up of players from some of
Europe's top leagues employing
defensive tactics. Rather than glorifying a scrappy victory in a poor
tournament, the attention should be
turned to the underperformance of
the would-be stars. Greece's victory was not so much a fairytale as a
default win. There is room for
fairytales in the world of football
and for the good of the game real
ones are needed. This summer's
World Cup would be a good place
for them to emerge.
While there is no team
with a true fairytale story like that
of Iraq, whose soccer team reached
the semi-finals of the 2004
Olympics following two decades of
horrific torture at the hands of
Saddam Hussein's son Uday, as
qualification stories go there have
been some fair candidates for fairytale status. While Trinidad and
Greece? We dream of Maradona, of
Cruyff, of Best. The game has been
starved of late of these players and
these dreams. The lacklustre performances of many of the world's
finest in Japan/Korea and Portugal
have left a void. Only one players
truly shines bright at the moment.
The one player who every kid in
the school yard 'bags' to play as is
the untouchable Ronaldinho. No
other player today creates the same
“How many people have played on the street
and dreamed of playing for Greece? We dream
of Maradona, of Cruyff, of Best. The game has
been starved of late of these players and these
dreams”
Tobago (led by Leo Beenhakker,
one of three former Holland bosses
set to lead other nations in
Germany) are the smallest country
ever to qualify for the World Cup,
the appearances of Angola and
Togo will be even more interesting.
Both teams are comprised mainly
of home-grown players still plying
their trade in Africa.
The real space for fairytales though needs to be filled by
the game's greats. Too often today
it is popular to support a defensive
underdog over an attacking power
of world football. The game needs
its great heroes however. How
many people have played on the
street and dreamed of playing for
buzz when he's on the ball, no other
player tries such outrageous tricks,
no other player can score such sublime goals, and has any other player ever set up goals with intentional passes with his back?
Ronaldinho is the only real idol
today. The game needs others and
needs great teams.
The real fairytales of the
game have always been those provided by the best. While the FA
Cup is praised for its giant-killings,
is a nil-all draw on a terrible pitch
in Burton really a great advertisement for the game? Likewise is
Millwall reaching the final a fairytale? Wimbledon's success was
undoubtedly a fairytale but the
great games and great memories
need to come from the best. The
greatest advertisement for the FA
Cup in decades was the 1999 semifinal replay between Arsenal and
Manchester United. A game played
by full strength sides with players
at the peak of their ability. A game
which featured fire, passion, an
injury time saved penalty, a red
card, and one of the greatest goals
the game has seen. These are the
games that people dream of and
that live on forever in people's
memories.
In Germany this summer
the football world needs games like
these and it needs its greatest
teams, teams like Brazil, France,
Italy, Spain and Argentina playing
at their peak. Games that will never
be forgotten. Euro 2000 was the
last tournament to provide this.
These games are needed to spark
the imagination, to inspire the kids
to come out onto the street after the
games and play in the light of the
street lamps, pretending to be
Ronaldinho or Henry and trying to
recreate the goals they've seen.
Whether they grow up to have one
fleeting moment in the sun like
Burton, or a lifetime wth
Manchester United, if they only
have the example of the likes of
Greece they may never even try.
Let's keep our fingers crossed for
more real fairytales.
Ronaldinho: The one true icon of today’s game?
Leinster and Munster Reach European Quarter-Finals
In what was an incredible weekend
for Irish Rugby, Leinster and
Munster both secured places in the
quarter-finals of the Heineken Cup,
with impressive victories over
English clubs Bath and Sale
respectively.
Munster’s 31 - 9 win at
Thomond Park was reminiscent of
the ‘Miracle Win’ against
Gloucester in 2004, with the boys
in red securing a vital bonus point
through a David Wallace try in the
third minute of injury time.
It didn’t take long for
Sale to lose their heads in the
imposing atmosphere at Thomond
Park, and after the enormous
Andrew Sherridan picked a fight
with Peter Stringer, Ignacio
Fernandez Lobbe weighed in with
an attempted punch on Jerry
Flannery that saw him spending ten
minutes in the bin. O’Gara took
adavantage of the resulting penalty
to nudge Munster into an early
lead.
Sale, leaders of the
Guinness Premiership, were unable
to cope with the sustained physicality of the passionate Munster side,
and Sebastien Chabal in particular
was on the receiving end of some
enormous hits from the likes of
Dennis Leamy, Paul O’Connell and
even
Ronan O’Gara, after his
match-winning performance when
Munster were visitors at Sale. The
immense Frenchman looked totally
lost by the start of the second-half
and his famous tackle-breaking
charges were nowhere to be seen.
O’Connell’s hit on
Chabal following a pinpoint
O’Gara restart was followed up by
a huge Munster drive, resulting in
Hodgson skewing his attempted
clearance. Munster crossed Sale’s
line for the first time in the 12th
minute, through Foley’s try from
the back of a well worked maul at
the lineout.
This forward dominance
was a huge element in Munster’s
victory, with the back row in particular putting in a huge effort to
counteract Sale’s impressive rucking. Wallace had his body in every
breakdown from the first to last
minute, and it should be no surprise
that it was he who was there first to
make the pick-and-go that produced the fourth try.
The Munster pack also
stood up at scrum time, and while
John Hayes could never claim to
have got the better of opposite man
Andrew Sherridan, he certainly
wasn’t obliterated by him, as many
had suggested would be the case.
Indeed, the scrum always looked
like a solid platform for Munster,
and Sale rarely managed to get a
nudge on.
Sebastien Chabal looks to break through, but finds
Muntser give no quarter at Thomond
This set-piece dominance
also extended to the lineouts, where
O’Connell and O’Callaghan helped
Munster win all but one of their
own throws, and where they also
managed to disrupt a significant
amount of Sale’s possession.
So impressive was
Munster’s pack that George Hook
demanded after the game that
O’Sullivan select seven of the eight
in Ireland’s starting line-up, sconceding that Easterby would get the
nod over Antony Foley.
Munster
were
also
uncharacteristically cohesive in the
backline, and each player from nine
to fifteen dominated his opposite
man from start to finish. Declan
Kidney’s decision to pick on form
and reward impressive Celtic
League performances from Ian
Dowling and Barry Murphy certainly paid dividends, with the
youngsters providing much of
Munster’s class outside O’Gara.
Dowling outplayed England firstchoice wing Mark Cueto, who was
never allowed to settle, and both
men acted as brilliant foils to the
hard running and tough yard gaining of the big South African centre
Trevor Halstead
Dowling went over for
his first European try after sustained pressure inside Sale’s 22
was finished by great hands and a
well-worked overlap out wide.
Barry Murphy followed
this with his own first Heineken try
after a dazzling run from halfway
that saw him skip past two tackles
and outpace Jason Robinson to
cross for Munster’s third, taking
them into the break 24 - 9 ahead.
Munster spent much of
the second half pushing hard for a
bonus point, whereas Sale seemed
content to kick for corners and
maintain a slender lead at the top of
Group A. Both teams defended
hard and with sustained aggression,
but no side could resist the level of
pressure exerted by Munster, and
their flawless set piece play
throughout the match eventually
led to Shaun Payne making the
break for Wallace to score a great
try, securing the top spot in the
Group.
Munster have always
been a team renowned for their
impassioned performances and
Thomond Park has been the stage
for some incredible victories, but to
put this remarkable victory down to
nothing but adrenaline would be to
do a great injustice to a terrifically
organised and clinical performance. That said, Munster played
with immense pride and selfless
commitment, and the atmosphere at
Thomond Park made it the most
intense of sporting arenas.
Leinster’s impressive 35
- 23 victory over Bath not only
guarenteed their own quarter-final
berth, but also ensured that
Munster got a home tie, and both
team’s performances bode well for
Ireland in this year’s Six Nations.
Of particular note for
Irish fans will have been Munster‘s
immense forward effort and Brian
O’Driscoll’s dramatic return to
form (see overleaf), scoring a try
and setting up two more with some
excellent breaks. Contempomi ran
the backline with expert precision,
and Leinster, like Munster, did well
to absorb some enthusiastic and
physical play from their English
opponents.
The victory further
marred the weekend for English
clubs, as it ended Leeds Tykes’
chances of making the quarterfinals. Leinster will now travel to
Welford Road to face Leicester,
usually a thankless task, but they
can take heart from Munster’s victory there in similar circumstances
three years ago.
Munster
will
face
Perpignan at home in a match they
will be favourites for, and though it
is far too soon to make any bold
claims about winning the competition outright, it is hard not to get
excited about the prospect of the
Heineken Cup finally finding a
place in the trophy cabinet at the
team’s headquarters in Musgrave in
Cork. After so many years of
heartache, no one deserves it like
Munster.
The question must now
be whether or not Eddie O’Sullivan
can carry over the success of the
provinces, with Ulster also performing well in Europe and at
home, and delivering some longedfor and international success.
Sports Editor: Peter Henry
Tuesday January 24, 2006
Trinity News
27
SPORT
Playing College hockey Short Sport
should be second nature Report
Too many talented hockey players coming to Trinity are opting not to join the College’s Ladies’ Hockey Club.
Adrienne Da Costa looks at this disappointing trend and suggests some solutions.
As a former Trinity player is named
as the new captain of the Irish
ladies’ hockey team, one wonders
when representing Trinity stopped
being an honour and started
becoming a chore. It’s a question
posed frequently by members of
DU Ladies’ Hockey Club. An
increasing number of students
coming up to Trinity are opting to
stay at their old club, or (worse
still) joining another club to which
they had no previous allegiance.
Trinity’s Ladies’ Hockey
Club fields five teams in their
respective Leinster leagues each
week. The first XI play in division
one, the highest possible club level
competition. This is their first season back at the top, having been
relegated to division two in 2004.
This relegation prompted the
departure of one then Ulster under21 and two Leinster under-21 interprovincial players, one of whom
left behind a four-year sports scholarship.
No one would deny that
the current season so far is proving
to be a challenge, but it is one to
which the players are rising.
Trinity’s position in the bottom half
of the league may, in some eyes,
render it second class to the likes of
European champions Hermes and
Leinster
champions
Loreto.
However, along with UCD, these
two clubs are the only ones out of
the top seven not to be composed
of players qualifying to play for
Trinity. These statistics surely
speak for themselves.
Amongst the Trinity students playing for other Leinster
clubs there is currently one Irish
development squad member and
Connaught senior interprovincial
player, one Ulster senior interprovincial champion, and two
Leinster under-21 interprovincial
champions.
The
question
is
inevitable: how well would Trinity
fare with the services of some of
these athletes? That is not to discredit the recovery from the relegation of 2004, which has been such
that the first XI already find themselves in a more healthy position
than on their previous outing in the
first division.
Many of the players who
haven’t made the move to the
College club have commented that
the state of the Club’s facilities has
discouraged them. In fact, to facilitate coaching, the first and second
XI now hold one of their two weekly sessions at Alexandra College in
Milltown. This allows for a more
structured programme and cuts by
half the journey time required to
the home pitch in Santry. It is
hoped that the continuation of this
arrangement will bring back some
of the College’s stronger players.
Nevertheless, College
hockey doesn’t come without its
rewards. Aside from their Leinster
league and Cup commitments,
Trinity players take part in the
annual Intervarsity and Colours
tournaments. These events are
regarded as highlights of the sporting calendar in any College club; in
the Ladies’ Hockey Club in particular, participation is seen as a
reward in itself. On more than one
occasion, those players involved in
other clubs have asked that they be
considered for the teams fielded for
these competitions. This was practiced by Queen’s University at this
year’s intervarsity competition:
they included in their team – which
lost to UCD in the final – two
members of the Irish development
squad who play for a top Ulster
club. Both Plate winners Trinity
and champions UCD disregard this
practise: members of the regular
team should not have to give up
their place to players who cite their
own aspirations to make representative teams as reason not to play
College hockey.
The College also merits
individual successes. As a member
of the Leinster under-21 side which
won the recent Interprovincial
competition, Rebecca Murphy has
earned herself a sports bursary, as
has Irish Universities representative and first XI captain Cecelia
Joyce, thus proving that college
level hockey isn’t without talent,
and that honours are not only
dished out to players in the top
clubs. In fact, Joyce, along with
reserve members Murphy and
Laoise Coady, have with the
Universities team been given the
chance to combine a very high
standard of hockey with a lot of
fun. It is an opportunity which
could easily be seized by the nonTrinity players should they choose
to first play for their College.
Currently a member of
the Irish development squad and
the Hermes side that won the 2005
European Cup, former DU Ladies’
Hockey Club player Aoife Mitchell
first earned her under-21 caps
Pugilists beaten in
Cambridge match
DU Amateur Boxing Club travelled to Cambridge for their annual match last Friday. There were
Trinity wins for Club Captain
Eoin Sheridan (light heavyweight), James Annett (middleweight)
and
Edward
Montgomery (lightweight). Pat
Wheen and Lois James took part
in
exhibition
matches.
Unfortunately the bouts, which
took place in the Cambridge
Union, went 5-3 to Cambridge.
Club members were entertained
by their hosts, Cambridge
University Amateur Boxing Club,
for the weekend.
Irish College League
basketball in Luce
The first XI’s top goal-scorer, Louisa Johnston (left), who returned to the College
club after staying with Glennane last season
Photo: Adrienne Da Costa
while studying Computer Science
at Trinity, from which she graduated in 2003. Mitchell continues to
be a great advocate of the college
game, as does her Hermes teammate, newly appointed Irish captain Linda Caulfield, who played
with Trinity during all four of her
college years, graduating in 2001.
Caulfield was capped
some forty-five times for Ireland
while she was still a Trinity student, earning her first at the age of
nineteen. She has gone on to
become Irish hockey’s most experienced female player, currently with
one-hundred-and-seventeen caps to
her name, and at only twenty-six is
the youngest ever to have reached
such a figure. Although modest
about her recent appointment,
Caulfield strongly emphasises its
significance for Trinity hockey: “It
just shows that if you’re a good
enough player, it doesn’t matter
what club you play for.”
During her time with
Trinity, Caulfield contemplated a
move to her current club Hermes,
but felt that representing her college would give her more of a
chance to shine: “I wouldn’t have
stood out at Hermes the way I did
at Trinity. Playing for Trinity meant
I had to work harder to play as well
as the girls from the top clubs, and
the coaches in Leinster saw my
motivation”. The Irish midfielder
has in the past played under the
Trinity’s current first XI coach
Harold de Jong: “Harold is a real
character, and he really gets the job
done”. She also praises the vast
experience of assistant coach
Mandy Holwey, who last year
played an instrumental role in
securing promotion to the top
flight. Overall Caulfield states that
it was because she enjoyed her
hockey that she improved her
game. “There’s such a strong team
spirit because you’re all in the
same boat. Looking forward to
things
like
Colours
and
Intervarsities brought us all closer
together. College hockey is so special; it’s only four years of your life
and it’s the only chance you get.
You leave with friends for life”.
She doesn’t understand the mentality of those who choose to stay
with another club in the hope that it
might increase their chance of
achieving interprovincial honours:
“Players sometimes make excuses.
They have the rest of their lives to
play club hockey. You make those
teams on your own merit; your club
isn’t important”.
To play or not to play for
Trinity – it is undoubtedly a decision that some players agonise
over, and an opportunity which is
later regretted by those who do not
seize it. One such player, Louisa
Johnston, came to College club this
year having chosen to stay at division two club Glenanne last season.
Johnston, who is currently the first
XI’s league and intervarsity top
scorer, regards her decision to play
for her college as having enriched
her college experience: “Going to
college and playing hockey are
both fun on their own, but choosing
to combine the two is a decision I
should have made a year earlier,
and it’s one I’ll never regret”.
In Trinity hockey every
success gained is one you share
with not only your team mates, but
your college mates, and to do so
appears to be that little bit extraspecial. Playing College hockey
must now return to being second
nature.
Sixteen teams played in the Irish
College League semi-finals and
finals in Luce Hall between Friday
16th and Sunday 18th December
last.
Despite a bad start in the
women's division one semi-final
against the University of Limerick
on the Friday, Trinity came back
in the second and third quarters
with great scores from Irene
Hobin. UL kept the lead however
and Trinity never regained the
points difference from the start of
the match. Trinity were only a half
bench due to many injury problems. Great defense was played
but this was not enough to overcome the strong Limerick side.
Ten points was the difference at
the end of the game, the final
score being 60-50. UL went on to
beat Dublin City University in the
final on the Sunday.
In the men's division
one final on Sunday, DU lost out
to Cork Institute of Technology.
Trinity got the first basket in this
game but CIT took the lead and
with a slow start by Trinity, CIT
were winning by fifteen points at
the end of the first quarter. Great
shooting from Cedric Assambo
kept Trinity in the game in the second quarter but at half time the
Trinity were losing by fourteen
points.
Trinity came back
strong with John Behan and Donal
Lynch shooting twenty-one points
between them in the third quarter.
At one stage they came within
three points of Cork. DU got into
foul trouble at the end of the high
scoring game with Kao, with
Behan and Mac a'Bháird all
fouled off. CIT scored nine free
throws as a result of team fouls.
This brought this fast paced game
to a stagnant end. The final score
was 108-95.
Rifle Club’s novice
event underway
DU Rifle Club are current running
an ongoing novice shooting competition, taking place every
Wednesday at the Club’s facility
on campus. The John Keeney
Novice Cup is an internal shooting
competition for complete novices.
The competition was the brainchild of Club legend John Keeney,
currently working in research here
in Trinity. It began as a private
challenge between two shooters
one Wednesday night at the range,
with the idea eventually being
endorsed as an official internal
DURC competition. The compe-
tition is thus named in honour of
its founder.
The John Keeney cup is
a great opportunity for complete
beginners
to
compete
informally whilst having fun: putting off your opponent, cracking
jokes at the range officers, and of
course, attempting to hit the target.
DU Rifle Club is currently the leader in the Celtic
League rifle competition. This
competition pits Trinity shooters
against those from Cardiff and
Aberdeen Universities.
100 years ago in College sport
Boat Club
For the past three weeks rowing
has been going on, more or less
intermittently, at Island Bridge.
Now, however, that Term has commenced, and nearly everyone is in
residence, we hope that new members will attend regularly; for it is
only by constant practise that the
difficulties of the “sliding seat” can
be overcome.
The junior members, too,
have been conspicuous by their
absence, and it would be well to
remind them, that a season’s rowing does not qualify them to shirk
attendance during winter months.
The art of oarsmanship is not learnt
in a few months, or even a year;
and there is every probability that
they will have to look to their laurels in the coming season.
Rugby Football
Since our last notes appeared the
Club has had an uninterrupted
series of victories, none of the
teams having to acknowledge
defeat. Club matches have had to
take second place to the
International trial matches, but still,
since Christmas, the first XV has
defeated
in
turn
Bective,
Lansdowne and Monkstown – the
first pretty easily, and the two latter
after hard games. Against
Lansdowne the backs had chief
credit for our rather narrow victory,
but against Monkstown best work
was done by our forwards, though
it must be said the opposition suffered more from the absence of
some of their regular players than
did our men. The two matches are
amongst the most important of our
Dublin fixtures, so it augurs well
for our chances in the Cup matches
that we were successful in both. All
the same, the form shown by both
forwards and back left much room
for improvement, which, we are
sure, will be evident at that time.
The second XV are head
of their division of the Junior
League, and, barring accidents,
ought to retain their position till the
end of the season. Still, there is a
slackness about some of the members, which is quite unusual in the
Club. They declare off for some
trivial excuse, and even then generally at the last moment, when it is
often impossible to get the best
substitute available. The same
remark applies, to some extent
also, to the lower XVs, who, all the
same, have put up some phenomenal score in their recent matches.
It is many years since the
captain of the Football Club has not
gained his Irish cap, and we congratulate Casement on keeping up
this splendid record. Parke, Thrift,
and Caddell have again added
another date to the caps, and, we
are sure, will today add to their
own reputations and that of their
University. The Club was well represented in the Inter-Provincial
matches, no fewer than twelve
members taking part in one or other
of these games.
Association Football
The last few weeks have not been
productive of much football,
chiefly on account of the number of
dates which have been closed, as
far as the League is concerned, for
Leinster Cup matches and the InterProvincial. But it is always difficult
to get the team together after the
Vacation. However, as the Term has
now started, it is to be hoped that
members will turn out in greater
numbers.
Last Saturday the second
XI played Swifts, in the College
Park, and were defeated, although
they beat the same team earlier in
the season. There was little or no
combination, and nearly everyone
displayed a lack of training. The
forwards were all too selfish, and
when they did pass it was erratically. Of the defence, Nichols played
hard, but is inclined to miss his
kick. Byrne was very weak in goal.
Hockey Club
Since the last account of our doings
appeared in these pages many
things have happened. As me made
our adieu last Term, we were
expecting a visit from Edinburgh
University. They came, but we conquered, after a pleasant game in
unpleasant weather. We hope the
fixture with the Scottish University
will become an annual one.
A few days after this
match Trinity went on tour to
Belfast. Various difficulties beset
us, and we had to travel with several substitutes in our ranks. Still, we
were very successful, and won all
our games comfortably enough.
The team played very well indeed,
and great credit is due to the substitutes, all of whom laid foundations,
on which we hope to see them build
great reputations.
We are now in the midst
of Cup ties. We met and defeated
Dundrum, in the first round, by one
goal to nil. The game was played in
the Park, and that fact made combination impossible amongst the forwards; otherwise it is probable we
should have scored a more decisive
victory, although the defence of our
opponents was very sound. For
Trinity, Carey played a fine game at
back, while Bridge was also good.
Today we play Three
Rock Rovers in the second round
of the Cup. For this match the following have been selected, and
given their colours for 1905-06:
Goal: JG Moloney; Fullbacks: GH McCormick, *TA
Carey; Half-backs: CG Sherlock,
DL Robinson, *EWG Young;
Forwards: WH Napper, DLC
Dunlop (capt), TS Dagg, RCS
Gregg, TW Bridge. (*New
Colours)
Trinity was well represented in the Inter-Provincial
matches – Dunlop, Dagg, Gregg,
Bridge, Robinson, McCormick,
Molony, all took part in the games,
while International honours have
only been awarded to DL
Robinson. To all of these, congrat-
In Black and White: DU Boat Club Junior eight in 1906. The crew, “conspicuous by
their absence” early in the year, went on to win Boyne, University, Limerick and
Waterford Regattas.
Photo: DU Boat Club
ulations.
In the Junior Cup, the
second XI beat Malahide, while the
Third established a record by winning their tie with Athy, this being
the first time a third team has won
a round in the Cup. It would be a
most gratifying sight should they
meet the second XI in the final
round.
We hope to have a interyear competition this Term. Five
teams are to play. Two of
Bachelors, one of Senior, and one
of Junior Sophisters, and one of
Senior and Junior Freshmen combined.
Extracts taken from TCD: A
College Miscellany, No 199 (1906)
Cover Story
TNT
How Much is Really
We’re constantly being told that we’re drinking too much, but
how true is it? Christine Bohan spent a night in the Pav and
the Buttery (purely for research purposes) to find out
I
t’s 8.30pm on a Friday night at the
Pav, and the place is so packed that
it’s physically impossible to get in
the door. There are a hundred or so people standing around outside it, despite
the cold weather, and everyone seems to
be having a good time. Some of the
boys from the Phil are talking animatedly at a table with so many beer cans on
it that it’s almost impossible to make
out the table underneath. Two boys are
sitting on the steps loudly rating every
girl who walks by out of 10 (“Ah come
on, 8 is a bit generous, her arse is massive”). A couple of skeletal girls are
knocking back their Malibu and Cokes
whilst talking loudly about how there’s
not enough hot guys on their course.
About half the people are dressed casually, having hung around college since
their lectures finished this afternoon,
whilst the rest are a bit more dressed up
to go on somewhere later, probably the
Palace.
It’s a similar story in the
Buttery, half an hour later, except with
less people. About half of the tables and
chairs have already been packed up for
the evening. The CD player doesn’t
kick in until about ten past 9, so until
then it’s possible to overhear a lot of the
conversations going on. It’s mainly
small groups of about 2-3, crouched
over the black tables with a few cans of
Tuborg each.
“You are SUCH a liar!
You’re so hammered
already! Oh my God, you
are the least sober of ALL
of us!” Cue a lot of drunken
laughing from the girls
This isn’t the picture of student
drinking that we see splashed all over
the media constantly, that we’re warned
about by health professionals, that concerned parents ask us about. There’s no
fights, no puking, no girls crying after a
few too many drinks. No-one is falling
over themselves or taking a discreet
slash in the bushes by the Pav. In fact it
all looks remarkably civilised. There
Alcohol and essay writing is always a bad combination
does seem to be a lot of cans on each
table in both the Buttery and the Pav,
but then there’s a lot of people sitting at
each table.
But this doesn’t tally with what
we know about our attitudes to drinking. The College Lifestyle and
Attitudinal National (CLAN) survey
found that 61% of male students and
41% of female students binge drink at
least once a week. Even taking that the
definition of binge drinking (at least
four pints of beer or four measures of
spirits or equivalent, in one session)
seems low enough to incriminate an
awful lot of us, that’s still a high number. Dr. David Thomas, the head of the
College Health Service is concerned at
the amount that students are drinking:
“The epidemic we’re seeing is not necessarily an increase in the number of
students experimenting with binge
drinking but instead an increase in the
number of drinks being consumed per
session”.
The College Service has seen a
marked increase in the number of stu-
dents making appointments for alcoholrelated reasons. “Over the past 5-10
years there’s been an increase in the
number of injuries related to alcohol,
cases of unprotected sex and both self
and assisted referrals for problem drinking” explains Dr. Thomas. “One major
concern would be that approximately
15% of significant binge drinkers would
go on to have serious long-term alcohol
problems”
Anecdotal evidence from the
Buttery and the Pav shows just how
unhealthy our attitude to alcohol is.
A table of four boys and two
girls in the Pav are happy to talk about
the amount they’re drinking tonight.
One of the boys had snuck in cans of
Tuborg from Centra: “It was better
value really. It’s two for €3 here [in the
Pav] but you get 6 for €7 in Centra so
it works out better. Guess it means you
have to drink more but I probably
would have done that anyway”. Two of
them are celebrating doing an exam
today. “I did shit, none of the stuff I
studied came up so I just want to forget
about it” says one, on his fifth pint of
the evening.
A lot of the third year History
class are in the Pav and they’re also celebrating doing an exam today. I’m talking to one of them when her friend
comes over to see what I’m writing
down. The friend is clearly drunk. She
holds on to the railings beside us but
still sways slightly as she talks. She
can’t focus. I tell her the article is about
student drinking patterns, and she gives
me her two cents: “Yeah... [long
pause]... yeah it’s such a problem. All
these kids hammered, it’s like... it’s a
problem, all the alcohol they’re drinking isn’t good...”.
A bunch of girls who look like
models are going on to the Palace after
the Pav. “Yeah we’re not drinking that
much tonight, going to stay sober and -”
“You are SUCH a liar! You’re so hammered already! Oh my God, you are the
least sober of ALL of us!”. Cue a lot of
laughing from the girls.
It’s all a lot calmer in the
Buttery. There’s a couple of boys discussing politics in the corner. From
casual eavesdropping it’s hard to tell
whether they’re hammered or if they’re
usually this hard to understand, as their
conversation jumps from topic to topic.
A girl at one of the tables tells
TNT
Cover Story / Sex Column
3
Too Much? The Sex
Column
Sorcha Lyons questions whether
or not three’s a crowd
“In my experience, Irish men, in a committed relationship, do not want a threesome.”
I made this statement one
evening and it has got me into a lot of
trouble with a lot of Irish men I know.
They have all denied it, slagged it and
have been unable to let it go… “AAHH,
look at the size of that spider, that’s
almost as terrifying as my other fear… a
threesome.” Cue raucous laughter.
However, my comment did not come out
of nowhere and the more they berate it,
the more defiantly I feel I must defend it.
It is common knowledge that
the “ménage a trois” is the fantasy of
choice amongst most young men in this
world. Two beautiful soft delectable
females pouring all their attention over
one lucky guy, kissing and sucking, licking and teasing and making one man the
centre of their world for at least an hour
or two.
Despite the bravado and
boastings, Irish men are not
up for some threesome
action
Cigarettes and alcohol
me about how strict the barmen in the
Buttery are about serving people who
are clearly drunk: “One time, they
refused to serve this girl that I know
cos she was hammered, so she asked
me to buy a couple of drinks for her. I
did, but the barman figured it out
somehow and followed me back to her
table and told me I couldn’t give her
the drinks. It was pretty unfair but I
guess he was just doing his job”.
One boy I talk to is driving
tonight but is annoyed at the price of
soft drinks in the Buttery: “It’s crap, a
pint of soft drinks is almost the same
price as a pint of beer. It’s not much of
an incentive not to drink for f***’s
sake. It’s the same everywhere, you
think they’d bring the prices down a
bit”.
The Buttery isn’t as crazy as
the Pav was. Most people are just here
for a quiet drink on a Friday evening,
rather than planning to go out
somwhere afterwards. There’s none of
the flirting, the shouting, the messing
around that there was in the Pav. “The
Pav is more for pissheads on the pull,
the Buttery is for a drink with your
mates”, one boy in the Buttery tells me.
Despite all the drinking that
went on tonight, it doesn’t hold true for
all students. A lot drink sensibly. A lot
don’t even drink at all. Current SU
President John Mannion is one of them,
as is Ents Officer Niall Hughes (despite
his rather misleading election campaign
slogan ‘Hughes for Booze’). The
College Alcohol Policy has seen a big
change in the promotion and giving out
of free alcohol by societies.
The biggest problem in changing our attitude to drink is that whilst
everyone agrees that there’s a problem
in our attitude to alcohol, no-one thinks
that they personally have a problem
with the way that they drink. That’s
why when it’s written about in the
media it sounds so puritanical, so out
of touch, so unfun. Whilst getting
drunk isn’t the worst thing in the
world, a new approach is needed to
convince us of the dangers and problems involved with binge drinking judging by tonight, the message simply
isn’t getting through.
Photographs (including cover photo) by Richeal
Carroll and Cian Kennedy
I wonder where this fantasy
comes from; the aspiration to be served
and worshipped or simply the love of the
female form? When quizzed, some male
friends of mine confessed that they’re
into the three-way for lots of different
reasons. One talked about the sexual
power that he would have when two
women are completely concentrated on
him. Another said the opposite, how the
hottest thing for him would be the fact
that he would be over-powered by two
predators- two hot females who want
their wicked way with him and won’t
stop until they are sweating, breathless
and completely satisfied. There are other
aspects that really turn people on- the
voyeuristic idea of being with two other
people as they have sex and totally let
themselves go.
As a young Irish woman, growing up in the ever increasingly cosmopolitan world of Dublin city, my friends
and I are developing and exploring our
sexualities. We’ve collectively discovered that although it is undoubtedly a
turn-on for most Irish men to watch
some lucky man pump into two buxom
American bombshells on the television,
it seems that Irish men are not partial to
a slice of the real girlie sandwich. As
soon as their girlfriend actually suggests
cranking the sex up a notch and inviting
the hot girl from across the bar in for a
bit of fun, the men hesitate. Oftentimes,
the girlfriend will just seductively suggest it to turn her beau on… but the
more seriously it is suggested, the more
uncomfortable he appears. Despite the
bravado and the macho boastings about
their cock, when it comes to the crunch,
Irish men are not up for some three in
the bed action. Why is this I wonder?
As with most phenomena, there
are a number of reasons: fear of ineptitude, insecurity, and emotional reasons.
Men love the threesome fantasy. The key
word is ‘fantasy’; if you took this and
made it a reality, it is likely that the mystery, the danger and the naughtiness
would be removed- it never could be as
good as each man’s specific fantasy.
Especially when faced with the reality of
the threesome- awkward slipping
around, jealousy and the aftermath. They
have to deal with their own emotions
and those of their partners- they have to
take a good long look at their relationship and wonder if this sex act is a sign
of unity or a sign of weakness. Is it a
positive sign that they can embrace the
intrusion of another partner or is the fact
that they felt the need for a third a negative sign. The latter idea comes laden
with feelings of sexual and emotional
inadequacy and can further exacerbate a
hostile relationship. So women, if you
want to give your man exactly what he
wants in order to save or improve your
relationship, a threesome is definitely
not the way to go.
The threesome is the food of
young, single people on holidays- it conjures up ideas of three people who don’t
know each other very well having spontaneous fun and enjoying themselvesthey only have to think of themselves
and their own pleasure. They are not
constrained within a relationship. They
are also not influenced by love and jealousy.
In all, threesomes are a good
laugh provided they occur outside relationships and are safe and wet and hot.
Within the relationship, it’s a different
story. All you people, who read this and
disagree*, just wait until you are in love
and have met that special someone…
you too will never want to share.
*That goes for you, in the rugby shirt,
scratching your balls.
4
Feature
TNT
How to Get Ahead in
Whether it’s getting wet with the Boat Club or tempting
the boys from Sci-Fi out of their den, Chloe Sanderson
presents the definitive guide to scoring in college
F
or years historians have
argued over how it came
into being, politicians muse
over how it should be governed, it can be in, out, good, bad,
and it appears that Oscar Wilde
wrote all his plays about it; but as
the tenth shot of slightly suspicious
Lidl-acquired liquor slipped down
my throat, I couldn’t help but wonder was it really going to get me
lucky?
Societies are, it seems, the
lynchpin of Trinity Life. Of course
you can go through your four years
avoiding them avidly, and find solace in matching Adam Chemistry
to Eve biochemistry, eventually
settling down with that special
someone who caught your eye
across a crowded lecture hall (or
sussed how drunk you were and
used the advantage as you slid
down the walls at Slapper Face
Jacks). But if you hope to ever tonsil tango with someone outside
your course, societies are where
it’s at. The big question is however, which society holds the richest
pickings for a not-too-self-respecting Trinity singleton?
This question led me all the
way to finding myself washing
away my last semblance of dignity,
and fighting with a bunch of complete strangers for the last dregs of
beverages that look like they had
been constructed by an ADHD
chemistry student on acid. I had
followed the yellow brick cobbles
all the way round the Fresher’s
Fair and here I was wallowing in
alcoholic abandon with a large
number of slightly bronzed, long
haired, bearded gentlemen with a
fetish for neoprene rubber, ready to
ride the wave of beautiful men that
I’m happy to say make up a large
proportion of the Trinity Surf
Club.
Sci-Fi will probably be glad
to see you even if you look
like the bride of
Chewbacca...
On waking with an unusually horrific sense of how much I
drank last night, the reality hit, I,
Chloe Patricia Abigail, Ingle
Sanderson (an absurdity of a
name), had entered a society. And
as I scrabbled over a carpet of
newly printed cards, half chewed
lollypops, and free condoms, only
to discover that my wallet had
been robbed of all its cosy warmth
of shrapnel, it occurred to me that
I may have entered just a few more
than one. I’d like to pretend that as
my alcoholic haze slowly lifted I
remembered running joyfully into
the outstretched arms of each of
those little stalls because deep
down I wanted to expand my horizon to a plethora of new enriching
life skills.
Perhaps instead I
could convince you, dear reader,
that I undertook the following
social experiment, surrendered my
money, joined so many of these
guilds purely for your information
and delectation, an insider’s look
for the outside world so to speak.
The answer all boils down to this:
Trinity is life, life is a scary place,
plaice is a type of fish, and in truth
this writer had a little fishing to do
herself. What I needed to know
was which society produced the
best catch? With any luck by the
end of this article we may have a
definitive answer.
The important thing you
may find in the rocky road of society dating is that each society has
its points of beauty, be it male or
female, but attached to each one
comes the necessity of complying
with a few society rules. For example should you be afraid of getting
wet it’s probably best to avoid the
Boat Club -luckily for me the
thought of getting wet under the
careful instruction of eight men
had a certain appeal. The Boat
Club provides Trinity with the
pleasure of boys and girls with
toned bodies, great stamina, and
every term or so, the Rowing
Massacre, a night that sacrifices
their fresh healthy livers, and blurs
their vision just enough to allow us
lesser post Christmas mortals a
chance of taking home one of
those stripy little blazers.
Of course if an action man,
or woman, sounds like a little too
Rich pickings in the Boat Club, Sci-Fi (picture not necessarily an accurate portrayal), Players and Music Soc
much hard work there’s always
one of the more sedentary societies
to take your dating fancy. I decided to try out the second largest
society around: The Phil. If you
can ignore the vaguely venereal
disease sounding title, this option
does have its advantages. They
come with their own rather large
semi-detached property, a penchant for providing copious free
drinkage, and the likelihood of
meeting at least one z-list celebrity. Just be warned that should you
choose this option, past experience
shows that they may not be quite
as big as their boots suggest, and
99% of the action you’ll be getting
will be postering.
Ever the fearless reporter
my research has even taken me
into alien territory. The Sci-Fi society, resting at the top of House Six,
proved to have a pleasing male to
female ratio. That means they’ll
probably be glad to see you even if
you look a little like the bride of
Chewbacca. Plus, being fans of the
obligatory Pav Friday when bored
of The Endevour (Oh dear Lord a
sci-fi joke, I’ve been invaded!),
you can always move on from one
of the Sci-Fi guys to the Palace’s
hoards of little Green Men.
Then there’s the cluster of
societies which are really just an
extension of some dusty faculty or
other. The Eurostuds have some
moderately lively parties which
aren’t too difficult to crash, and
TNT
Feature / Fresher Column
Societies
although it has been said that
French is the language of love,
take time to honour the Germans,
after all they ‘liebe dick’,
brochvurst, David Hasslehoff,
and they’re very VERY efficient.
If we’ll admit to it we’ve
all at some point or other in our
sordid little lives imagined that
that little gyrating voice box of
lyrical love coming at you
through the romantic pixels of
MTV are in fact not merely
singing for their 50Cent supper,
but singing a love song written
exclusively for you. Enter the
Music Society, a litany of lyrical
lovelies that could pluck at your
heart strings or at the very least
offer a quick fiddle.
On the artist theme,
Players offer the chance at a truly
exclusive relationship; pop up to
the studio, they’ll offer you a cup
of tea, take your soul, and spit
you out at the end of four years
thinking you’re happier being
someone else. Plus for my male
readership there’s the added danger that you might start to think
tights and makeup are acceptable
in the name of art, though I suppose it could be worse - after all
the Caledonian Soc boys like
wearing skirts, and the Visual Art
Soc spend a whole heap of time
perving on people who wear
nothing at all.
Lastly, although not officially a society the safest bet for
something pretty to look at is
surely the Trinity Fashion Show.
Probably best avoided if you find
height intimidating, this collection of coathangers won’t cost
you too much in dinner dates and
should you ever find yourself
accosted by the Gardaí after a few
too many Bavarias then these
beauties will perform the art of
straight line walking long enough
for you to scarper quicker than
they can shout Pete Doherty.
Sadly this article can’t
offer you a comprehensive survey
of all the societies CSC has to
offer, after all no one wants to be
a society whore. However should
the bevy of beauties I’ve listed
not take your fancy there’s a full
list at: www.csc.tcd.ie from which
to take your pick. Plus, as we all
like to get a little out and breath
and sweaty from time to time the
50 or so sports clubs DUCAC has
to offer means you can put away
the Barry White and get straight
to the good stuff. Now due to the
fact that I spent more of my childhood looking like a ball than
playing with one – it’s a vicious
circle that ends with cake – I
couldn’t tell you much about their
individual merits.
What I do know is
whether it’s the dregs of or high
society you’re after, in the question of boy meets girl, in the end
only you can decide which society rules.
Surf Club: “Bronzed, long-haired gentlment with a fetish for rubber...”
5
The
Fresher
Column
Jason Robinson has a novel way to
impress the person you fancy in college
So after the much needed break, it's back
to college again. Just when college work
was fading into the back of most students minds, it all comes flooding back
again. Exams. Essays. Tutorial Work.
And blah. And blah. And blah.
But hey, it ain't all bad, and I
don't think we can really complain. First
up,however, I must apologise. For everybody out there who does read this column, I really did want to have some
cringeworthy stories about my Christmas
to share with you all. Grandparents
buying me big woolly cardigans;
GranAunts harassing me and stuff of
that nature. But unfortunately, everything
went down well in the Robinson
household this Christmas. No interfamily
murders this year. No maiming of the
family's black sheep. No sacrificial rituals. Andto make things worse, I had a
good New Year aswell. Instead of
lounging around putting off essays and
the like, I decided to join my half-Kiwi
friend on a short trip to the far-off land
of New Zealand. Most of you, I'm
sure, will remember the New Year passing through in a blur of drunkeness. I
however, was in transit to New Zealand.
Trust an Irish person to be somewhat
sad at missing out on New Years drunken revelry while travelling half-way
across the world...
Last issue I made a few comments about BESS girls, and
it seems that some have
taken offence. And rightly
so...
So, two and a half weeks of
friendly New Zealanders, racial stereotypes ("Oh you're Irish? To be sure, to be
sure. Be-gosh and be-gara"), a never
ending amount of McDonald's, empty
Irish bars and most importantly, Japanese
camera-wielding tourists. In all seriousness, how do they do it-they're EVERYWHERE!?Ahem. I love the Japanese.
But seriously, if any of you are
thinking of heading off far from Ireland
this summer, New Zealand really has
lots to offer. Personally, being a bit of a
pansy, I only partook in a bit of wakeboarding, kayaking, trekking and so on,
but for the more adventurous, you can do
stuff like Zorbing(being rolled around in
a giant sphere!), bungy jumping, sky
diving and all that jazz. So hey, take a
trip there if you can. Carpe Diem and
other words of wisdom.
So waffling about my trip HAS
been beneficial...I think...Moving on...
Last issue, I made a few wee comments
about BESS girls. It seems however, that
all BESS girls have taken offence by
these- rightly so, you thick gits. Nah
ONLY JOKING. I REALLY like Bess
girls. No seriously, I really do...
So, this issue I hoped to have a
wee report about a visit to Starbucks you know that strangely appealing looking building about a minute away from
Trinity? Appealing BUT deadly, so I
hear. But, due to being some thousands
of miles away, it was not feasible. I also
hoped to have my concept of
"Ecumenical Deathmatch" brought out
into the open, which I suppose I can do.
Basically, like many Freshers,
I've heard rumours of a strange Trinity
College rule whereby a Protestant can
challenge a Catholic in a duel in Front
Square. Now, details are sketchy, but
over the next month, I will try find out
more. Personally, I think the possibilities
are endless. American commentators
going crazy. Cheerleaders. Maces.
Tridents. Chainsaws? RTE could really
make a pretty penny out of it. Think
about it- There's a guy/girl you don't
like- you don't quite know why.
Suddenly, you find out they are a different religion to you- BAM! Challenge
them in the greatest battle of all- "ECUMENICAL DEATHMATCH." Bad taste?
Maybe. Good idea? Most definitely. The
campaign for more fatally violent sports
in college, and indeed our society, starts
now...
Anyway, to round off another
poor attempt at humouring Trinity students, just have to say I've sold out and
become a true Trinner student. It was the
penultimate day of the Library opening
times before Christmas. It was five
minutes to 5. The desk wouldn't take my
book. I was going to leave it back, but
due to peer pressure(the cause of all
societies problems) from an older
student(how could I not be influenced?!),
I hid the book in a different shelf
to collect the following day. I'm sorry.
I'm a bad person and deserve whatever
is coming to me. I'm now going to
drown my sorrows and hold my head in
shame whenever I enter the library. It's
only fair. Anyway. On that note, I will
bid you all adieu. Welcome back, everyone!
6
Interview
TNT
Breakfast with Cillian
TNT’s Cillian O’Conchúir talks to Cillian Murphy about
dropping out of college to act, his favourite co-stars and
being nominated for a Golden Globe for ‘Breakfast on Pluto’
The year just gone by saw the emergence
of Cillian Murphy onto the summit of the
Hollywood scene, as he starred in two of
the year’s blockbusters. He first attempted to destroy the world as Dr. Jonathan
Crane (Scarecrow) in Christopher
Nolan’s, Batman Begins Then he played
the villainous Jackson Rippner in Wes
Craven’s thriller, Red Eye, the film which
many believed the best thing about it was
the performance of Cillian Murphy and
that of Rachel McAdams.
An almost childlike enthusiasm
is evident as he talks about his co-stars in
Batman Begins. “I’m a big fan of
Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman. I
got to meet them and they were cool.
Let’s put it this way; you get to meet legends like that.” The film also saw his
first role as a villain. “It was something
that I had never done before. It had really good directors and a really good
script, so I thought I’d give it a go”. His
role has contributed to one of the most
asked questions, about his fear of being
typecast as a villain, something he has no
concerns about “I have made ten feature
films and I have only been the bad guy
in two that just happened to come out
one after the other.”
A native of Douglas, Co. Cork,
he was a late starter on the acting scene.
He started out as a guitarist in a Frank
Zappa inspired band called ‘Sons of Mr.
Greengenes,’ and studied law in
University College Cork before embarking on a journey which led him to a
Golden Globe nomination.
Cillian Murphy, the best thing to come out of Cork since... er...
ou don’t make movies to get
awards! You make movies to
make good movies,” states
Cillian Murphy, commenting on
the recognition he’s received since being
nominated for a Golden Globe for
Breakfast on Pluto, alongside Johnny
Depp, Pierce Brosnan and the eventual
winner Joaquin Phoenix. “I was thrilled
to be nominated. I put my heart and soul
into Breakfast on Pluto and worked very
hard. I believe very much in the film and
I love the character.”
‘Breakfast on Pluto’ opened in
cinemas on January 13th and Cillian
found he had a challenge in bringing the
character of Kitten, a transsexual, to the
“Y
big screen. “It was challenging in that I
had to play a man who wanted to be a
girl, who was still a boy, who doesn’t
have a dad. He had to grow up and wanted to love. It is a very complicated part
and a part that I fell in love with a lot
and I have a lot of affection for the character.”
It is often said that the Golden
Globes are an indicator for the Oscars, so
what does he make of this talk? “I say
that’s fair enough. It’s too foolish to
dwell on things that you have no control
over. All I can do is believe in the film
and the part that I have played. If they
decide to nominate me I think that’s
great but I have my life to live.”
“Fame is all over
rated. I’m just doing
a job and this is part
of it”
He once said: “I’d probably
have been wealthier if I had stayed with
law, but pretty miserable doing it.” So
how close did he come to choosing a life
of misery over what he humbly describes
now as a ‘privileged position?’ “Well I
did it for a year and a half, but I failed
my first year. Then I passed the exam
and then I ditched it. I always felt that I
could go back and continue if I wanted
to, but it just wasn’t the right course for
me.”
He might not have been where
he is today if were not for his persist-
ence. “After going to see a couple of theatre shows in Cork, I found them quite
appealing and wanted to pursue acting.
My family thought I was an ejit and
thought it was all going to fall apart. I
went and I knocked on the door of a theatre company in Cork and they gave me
a job in Disco Pigs.”
In 1997, Quando saw Cillian
appear on the big screen for the first time
“If I’d stayed studing
law I’d probably be
wealthier but pretty
miserable doing it”
and it was an opportunity he didn’t let
slip. “I had seen Cillian in the original
production of Disco Pigs by Corcadorca
in Cork,” says Declan Recks, director of
Quando. “He was outstanding in that
production and from the moment he ran
onto the stage everyone knew he was
someone to watch out for.”
By all accounts Cillian made the
stage his own but many have tried to
make the step from theatre to film and
failed. “My only concern at the time,”
continues Declan Recks, “was whether
or not he could rein in the huge energy
that was evident on stage. But he was
incredibly focused and learnt very quickly how to tailor his talents to the camera.
It was a small part for him but anyone
who saw the film couldn’t but notice his
very obvious screen presence.”
He made his television debut in
the BBC mini-series, The Way We Live
Now but it was as Jim in 28 Days Later
(2003) that Cillian was launched onto the
world cinema stage, which he followed
this up with a leading role in The Girl
with a Pearl Earring, alongside
Hollywood’s golde Scarlet Johansson
and Colin Firth.
He is slow to mention any
names in relation to preferred co-stars.
“I’m not going to say I prefer some to
others. It would belittle the others.
Brendan Gleeson is a special favourite of
mine. He is a bit of a hero of mine and
he has been very good to me all the way
through my career. Liam Neeson as well.
All these guys have been very important
to me and very supportive. I have met so
many interesting and fascinating people
doing films and theatre that I could never
choose one above any of the rest of
them.”
TNT
Interview / Our Man Abroad
Murphy
While some actors make no
secret of their extravagant lifestyle,
Cillian seems to have his two feet firmly
on the ground, quickly dismissing any
suggestion that he is a celebrity. “I don’t
consider myself a celebrity. I’m not
interested in that sort of thing. It is a
very privileged position to be in, to get
travel around the world and to get to
meet interesting people. I get to do
something that I want to do.”
He also was sceptical of the
impact of fame on actors. “Fame is all
over rated. I’m just doing a job and this
is part of it. I just want to make a piece
of art. That’s all I really want to do. All
this stuff is nice, but I’m not really into
going to parties. I would like to have a
couple of pints with my buddies and
that’s important to me.”
He plays the part of ‘Capa’ in
Danny Boyle’s eagerly awaited Science
Fiction film, Sunshine, which witnesses
him attempt a rescue mission to the sun
which is on the brink of dying out.
“There is a group of us on a spaceship
flying towards the sun and I’m a good
guy,” he adds, referring to the endless
questions about him being typecast as a
villain. “I have worked with Danny
before and I think it will be an amazing
film.”
The Wind That Shakes the
Barley will also reach cinemas in 2006,
but Cillian wasn’t giving much away. “It
is about the war of independence in
Ireland in Cork; the flying columns, Tom
Barry and the Civil War. I think it will be
quite controversial and should raise a
few hackles in Cork. It has a wonderful
director in Ken Loach and it was an
amazing experience.”
“I’m not really into
going to parties. I like
having a couple of
pints with my buddies”
Apart from these two further
films being released in 2006 Cillian
looks forward to spending time with his
three month old son, Malachy. “My family are the most important thing to me in
the world and everything else is second
to them. My life has improved one hundred fold since my son was born. He is
the most amazing little man in the world.
I love him and he is what makes life
important to me.”
“Looking at his career choices
he seems to have been able to achieve
the delicate balance of commercial
movies with more art house fare and I
always look forward to seeing his next
movie,” concludes Declan Recks. Cillian
finishes by listing off names of actors he
would like to co-star alongside in the
future. With his talent, laid-back attitude
to fame and ability to take on the most
diverse of parts, we predict an Oscar on
the horizon for Cillian Murphy.
Cillian in Red Eye, 28 Days Later and Breakfast with Pluto
7
Our
Man
Abroad
David Traynor is finding exams in
Salamanca very different from TCD
¡Hola chicos! I hope the new year is
maybe giving a polite nod to the profestreating you all well. It was with a sense
sor, but even that is not necessary.
of depression that I trudged back to
Today's exam wasn't too bad
Salamanca last Saturday. I wished I
but I have a tough one on Monday and
could have stayed longer. I only had two then an eight day break until my last
weeks on the Emerald Isle before I came one. It's been a real wake-up call to see
back to the harsh reality of exams and
the serious side of university life over
assignments. For the first time in my
here and God knows it's been good for
life, coming home felt more like a holime but I can't wait until next term when
day than anything else.
there will be less to worry about and the
It was great to be home, though, weather is getting warmer.
because it felt like a holiday. I spent the
You may have seen Spain in the
whole time meeting up with friends and
news recently for jumping on the everfamily, almost having to tick off a list of
growing bandwagon to introduce a
people I had to visit. Needless to say, I
smoking ban. It came into force here on
didn't get to see half of them. So, I
the 1st January as part of the Antiarrived back last Saturday after a 14
Tobacco Act which, among many other
hour journey through Stansted, taking
measures, aims to combat Spain's love
the cheap Ryanair option. I won't be
affair with the cigarette. So, as you can
doing that again for a while..
imagine, when I returned to Salamanca
The next day, I was straight
after the holidays, I expected to find a
back into the swing of things with an
rejuvenated, smoke-free Spain. But, alas,
assignment due for Monday. I can't realno. As my flatmate and fellow European
ly complain though. It's only the second
Studies student, Siobhán said, they just
piece of work I've had to hand up this
seemed to miss the whole point. The
term. Whether or not they're just lenient
only thing I noticed different was that
on Erasmus students, it seems the gener- bars now have signs up saying "It is peral workload over here is lot less than that mitted to smoke in this bar. (Smoking is
of Trinity. I've only had to do one
bad for your health.)" When I asked one
assignment and a presentation so far.
of my Spanish flatmates about this, he
Anyone else I know here, Spanish or
said, "Well, small bars can choose if
Erasmus, has had a similarly low workthey're smoking or non-smoking and
load.
large bars have to provide a non-smokI've also been busy studying for ing area." In other words, Spain opted
my exams. Courses here are fully semes- for a cop-out; a half-baked diluted smokterised so the first term ends on the 23rd
ing ban, not the Mícheál Martin-style
December and then there are no classes
"all or nothing" ban which seemed to
until the start of the second term, which
come into force so seamlessly in Ireland.
is the 30 th January. I have three exams
Only in Spain..
this month, the first of which I did today.
So, that's all my news for the
Exams are an extremely differmoment. Next time I'll be talking to you,
ent experience over here compared to
I'll have my exams out of the way and
what I was used to in Trinity. First of all, hopefully passed so I can start focussing
past papers are not disclosed, so, you are again on my social life. Until then,
given very little of idea of what type of
¡hasta luego!
questions and what
areas of the course are
going to come up.
Second of all, you do
your exam in a classroom with your professor. It is much less
formal than Trinity
and you don't have to
deal with those
demonic invigilators.
If you need to leave to
go to the toilet, you
just get up and go,
Salamanca in wintertime: Photo by Jago Tennant
8
Politics
TNT
A Long Way From D4
Derek Owens asks what next for Ivana Bacik, the Labour
Party’s Great Red Hope?
RTE's 'Questions and Answers' isn't normally an occasion of high drama. In Kerry,
though, they do things differently. Just ask
Ivana Bacik. Appearing on the programme
near Dingle, she suggested that a recent
drop-off in tourism had some connection to
hotel owners and shopkeepers charging
extortionate prices. "That may be the case
where you're from," a spirited Kerryman
interjected, "but you're a long way from
Dublin 4 now!" The studio erupted. The
heckler may have sounded like a character
from 'Deliverance', but he had a point. Even
before being interrupted, Bacik looked out
of her element, warning against the "rehabilitation" of Charles Haughey in an area
with long-standing affection for him, showing open contempt for Sinn Féin in the
county that elected a gun-runner, and struggling to suffer fools gladly. It's an admirable
trait that our criminology professor, who
appeared not so long ago as the saviour of
champagne socialism, refuses to mince her
words. It's also a quality that could just
derail a promising political career.
After three unsuccessful election
campaigns (for a TCD Seanad seat in 1997
and 2002, and the 2004 European Elections
in Dublin) most politicians would be considered a failure. A credible haul of 40,707
votes in 2004, though, her willingness to
articulate intensely-held (if unpopular)
views, and the aging, increasingly lethargic
Labour party made Ivana Bacik's relative
youth and energy all the more striking. In a
party composed of has-beens and neverweres, Bacik seems like the great red hope,
an outspoken, confident voice on the moderate Left. There's growing evidence,
though, that this outspoken nature and her
growing public profile as a liberal firebrand
(not a contradiction in terms), is becoming
a problem for her. It's already managed to
scupper at least one speaking engagement.
Fordham University, where she was due to
speak on immigration and the law, cancelled her appearance in September. This
was due, she asserts, to the intervention of
Cardinal Edward Egan, and her stance on
abortion. The incident says more about
Fordham University's intellectual cowardice than it does about Professor Bacik's
suitability to speak on immigration, but is a
worrying sign of how her reputation as the
uncompromising, slightly shrill voice of
South Dublin liberalism precedes her. Her
recent decision to bring a case before the
European court of human rights on behalf
of the group 'Safe and Legal in Ireland',
hardly dispels this image. It's brave, even in
today's Ireland, to argue the case for abortion as a fundamental human right. It's also
electoral suicide.
Lest we forget, Bacik's priority at
this point in time, if she still harbors political ambitions, must surely be to win public
office. Her chosen party, her background,
and her views make it hard to see her having electoral success outside the socially
liberal, affluent and left-leaning districts of
South Dublin. A quick look at individual
constituencies, though, show that securing
a party nomination, let alone a Dáil seat, is
going to be a battle. Her home constituency
of Dublin South East is shared with Ruari
Quinn, who struggled badly to retain his
Conventional wisdom holds
that there's only one
Labour seat in this threeseater constituency.
Conventional wisdom is
right.
seat in 2002. The former Labour leader is
highly unlikely to accept a running mate so
soon after his brush with unemployment.
Next door, Dublin South Central has a sitting Labour TD in the form of Mary Upton,
and an ambitious local councillor in Eric
Byrne. Byrne has had two stints as a Dáil
deputy already and, with a hard election
campaign looming, (both Fine Gael
and Labour are anxious to
poach a seat from Fianna
Fáil) Labour members
are more likely to go
with the experienced
poll-topping local
councillor as Upton's
running mate. Dublin
South-West,
meanwhile, is solidly working
class. It's also Pat Rabbitte
country. Not only is Bacik's
party leader ferociously territorial
(his
declining
personal
approval
ratings
and the
tendency
o f
Labour leaders seeking re-election to struggle won't do much to change this) but the
area also has another left-wing Dáil deputy
in Sinn Féin's Aengus Ó Snodaigh. His continuing rise, and the prospect of a clash with
the dangerous Rabitte, should be enough to
warn Bacik off this area.
On the face of it, Dublin South
seems an ideal home for Professor Bacik: a
constituency with five seats, and no Labour
TDs. The one problem is that Labour have
already had their selection conference here
- in fact, the battle for the Labour nomination was a dead heat, and county councillor
Aidan Culhane's name had to be drawn
from a hat. Tagging Bacik's name on the
ticket in an area where the party is both
divided and lacking electoral support
wouldn't be the smartest thing Labour's
central office has ever done. It would also
alienate local activists, including Culhane
himself (and Alex White, the unlucky loser
at the convention). Strangely, a tie-breaker
situation also cropped up selecting a candidate for Dublin Mid-West. This time
Joanna Tuffy (who performed strongly in
the last general election) got lucky, after
failing to beat Robert Dowds, another
ambitious councillor, in a straight vote
among
local
party
members.
Conventional wisdom holds that
there's only one Labour seat to be
won in this three-seater constituency. Conventional wisdom is right.
All this leaves one
potential home for Bacik in
South Dublin - as a running
mate to Eamon Gilmore in the
volatile Dun Laoire-Rathdown
area. There are several seats here
for the taking - Cieran Cuffe of the
Greens has never really recovered from embarrassing revelations about a notso-green share
portfolio and
F i o n a
O'Malley, the
i n e ff e c t i v e
Progresssive
Democrat
deputy, is
strongly
tipped to
lose her
seat.
Ironically she managed to alienate
local PD activists by putting friendship
above party loyalty, campaigning for Bacik
in the European elections - returning the
favour by muscling into her friend's constituency and nabbing her Dáil seat would
certainly prove Bacik's determination. It
would also earn her the reputation as a coldhearted harridan. There's also Éamon
Gilmore, pessimistic about local Labour
support and unhappy about the prospect of
a running mate, to think about, and a local
organisation dominated by ex-Democratic
Left members. These more traditional Irish
lefties are far from certain to take to the university professor. There is a hope for a seat
in this constituency, but the complications
may be too much to overcome.
There is no such thing as an easily-won seat. For Bacik in 2007, though, it's
even more problematic. There simply isn't
room for her in any South Dublin constituencies, while sending her out beyond
the pale would be a waste of a fine candidate. If Bacik is to find her way into
Leinster House, it's probably going to be
via the back door of the Seanad. She can
either hope that Labour fights its way into
government (and that a Taoiseach's nomination falls her way) or she can do it for
herself. This will entail a nationwide
charm-offensive on county councillors, or
another tilt at a Trinity Seanad seat. On the
face of it, the latter course looks far more
realistic: She narrowly lost out to Senator
Mary White in her 2002 bid for a seat in the
Seanad, and White has already declared her
intention to retire rather than stand again. A
sitting senator, David Norris, may have the
left-leaning liberal votes already well
staked out, but her high national profile
should still help sew up election here.
So a Seanad seat at least is a real
possibility for Labour's new hope in the
next few years, and David Norris should
quite rightly be spooked. But then what?
The safest course of action would be to sit
tight in Leinster House, waiting for her constituency colleague Ruari Quinn to retire
gracefully and leave her with a clear path to
the Dáil. By then, though, it could easily be
2012, and who knows what bright young
thing will emerge for Labour in the meantime? Five years spent in the Seanad could
expose Bacik to damaging media scrutiny,
or worse, anonymity. The voting public are
less deferential to unknown senators than
they used to be, particularly in Dublin. The
Trinity professor may be talented, intelligent, and (in the right area) very electable,
but she has trapped herself by her temperament, views and background in the already
overcrowded political pond of South
Dublin. The great red hope's career in politics may be effectively over before winning
a single election.
TNT
Politics
9
The Kids are Alright - The Case for Youth Politics
Carl Fox
Irish politics suffers from a rather serious
and debilitating confusion. As a state, we
seem to be unable to distinguish between
which issues are local, and which are
national. I’ve no idea who said that all
politics is local, but I’d like to give the
individual in question a good shake. This
kind of thinking has been holding our
political development back for generations.
In this country, local government is a joke. Very few people take it at
all seriously and it’s commonly seen as a
training ground for a run at the Dáil. This
is neither the case, nor how things should
be. Local government exists for a very
specific reason, namely, and forgive me if
you saw this coming from the start, the
governance of local issues. That’s its
remit, that’s why it’s there. Unfortunately,
the tendency is for everyone to simply
ignore it and go straight to the local T.D.
with any problem. If a concerned citizen
needs a third speed bump on the road, or
the sink fixed, or possibly someone to
water the flowers then it’s his/her representative in the national parliament that
gets a call. Now, generally all a T.D. can
do is to refer the matter to the city or
county council via a question, or pass it
off to a colleague on said council. With
the end of the dual mandate, T.D.s have
no real power to get a playground built or
a new set of traffic lights installed.
However, the perception still persists that
they’re the only ones who can, and we
continue to elect politicians on the basis
of what they’ll do for us, and the local
area.
The whole country seems to
be missing the point of having a national
parliament at all. They’re all there to discuss issues of national significance, and
make decisions based on the good of the
nation as a whole. Questions about how
we want our society to proceed have
national answers. Education, job creation,
standards of employment and so on, are
not challenges that we can deal with on a
unitary level, in a fragmented way. We
need to untie the hands of our representatives and we need to learn to take a broader view of politics and re-evaluate what it
is that we want to get out of democratic
elections.
This is where youth politics
and involvement with political parties in
college should prove invaluable. There
seems always to exist a certain suspicion
of mainstream political activism, in that
participants are often seen as enhancing
their C.V.s and looking to further their
own ambitions. And it’s amazing how
easily people are turned off political discussion by mistrust of motives and personalities. Whether you agree with them
or not, college political parties are providing an almost unique facility, they’re
offering to debate and argue theory and
practice in a way that’s not constricted by
the unfortunate realities of electoral politics. You’re not their constituents and they
aren’t expected to appease you. When college branches and youth organisations
talk about things like social policy and
economic theory they’re discussing the
national concerns that we don’t generally
see our T.D.s coming to us on the
doorsteps about.
Don’t treat on-campus political activity as merely an extension of
political parties. There’s a fundamental
difference in the essence and character, a
difference that needs to spread outwards.
It’s not just the level of idealism, it’s the
freedom to pursue national, and even
supra-national, objectives without the hindrance of immersion in the nitty-gritty of
local affairs. I think everyone who’s
involved in politics at almost any level
regularly feels the temptation to go
Athenian on the silent, apathetic majority,
and if you’ve read this far then I see no
reason to restrain myself this time. A
democracy is as strong, or as real, as the
amount of participation by the citizenry,
and the depth and breadth of its understanding. There has to be a responsibility
to engage with the political process and
how this takes place is crucial to the
development of politics in Ireland and further afield.
Youth politics can be the
grounding that gives future leaders the
imagination to take this country away
from the all too pervasive culture of locality and blinkered self-interest. It is capable of producing generations of politicians
prepared to make the structural changes
necessary. It can also be a way for us all to
raise consciousness of the national issues
that get swept under the carpet by the fuss
made over their counterparts that, while
important, are simply too confined and
insular to impinge on a national legislature. Early involvement at a theoretical
level may not seem practical or useful to
many, however, it is one established and
straightforward way to broaden the scope
of our collective view of government, and
hopefully instil a radically new approach
to the use of the colossal amount of energy and activity expended on politics in
this country. Who would argue that it
couldn’t be better spent than on false
promises and phoney posturing?
Carl Fox is Chair of the Trinity Branch
of the Labour Party
Is This the End of the Liberal Line?
Hugh Roche-Kelly sizes up the would-be leaders of the LibDems
Ahh... Charles Kennedy's gone. I know he
wasn't great, but at least he was human. He
was the most liked British politician, even if
we now know that was more to do with a
steady flow of intoxicating vapours that
emanated from his rosy cheeks at all times.
British politics has lost an essential component in the love triangle of party leaders; the
affable drunkard has up to now provided a
counterpoint to the machiavellian Cameron
(who has recently been using his handicapped son as a pity card) and the image
consultant-in-training that is Blair. (I mean,
really, that video diary? Good God it's truly
painful to watch. I didn't even want to watch
it, I was looking for pornography).
So who is going to replace him? Well,
between now and the first week of March
there should, in theory, be just as much back
stabbing polemic and ranting that characterised the Tory leadership race in 2005, so
we can all look forward to a riveting... oh
wait. Sorry, this is the Liberal Democrats,
they don't do exciting. Which is why
Kennedy will be missed. Ah well, time to
move on and that… But to whom?
Well, the guy who’s provisionally in
charge is Sir Menzies Campbell. He would
have been an obvious enough choice- elder
statesman and all that- was well respecteduntil he stabbed Kennedy in the back (probably with a bottle). Et tu, Menzus. If he were
to gain the leadership, he would, apparently,
rid the contemporary political debate of
“flim flam,” according to the party’s former
leader Lord Ashdown. Most people use
cough syrup for that. Besides, the flim-flam
mightn’t have to worry too much. Many
former loyal supporters of Sir Campbell
have turned against him over the fact that he
really made it pretty obvious that he was
spending the nights between Kennedy’s
admission and Kennedy’s resignation saying “excellent…” a lot. And the fact that his
nickname is “Ming” is just a bad idea. Also,
he’s old. Er. This seems to be the entire campaign against Campbell so far, basically he’s
an old fart with a stupid name. Sir Ming.
Honestly.
The man waging (perhaps “wagging”
is a better word, remember what party we’re
talking about) the aforementioned campaign is, well, funny looking. His name is
Mark Oaten, and he looks like the sort of
person who eats things called ‘toad in the
hole,’ ‘spotted dick,’ or ‘bread and butter
pudding.’ He’s got the private backing of
Kennedy, but whether or not this is a good
thing is yet to be seen.
If he focuses too much on the
unceremonial ‘decapitation’ of his predecessor, he’s going to be seen as belonging to
the old school of ‘nice and easy there’ Lib
Dems. (i.e. amiable drunkard.) Even he
seems philosophically cynical about his
chances, stating that even if he himself does
lose, then Campbell will “only be a stop gap
measure” (the implication here presumably
being that he’ll be dead soon). Campbell is
the favourite among MPs, but the entire
The entire campaign
against Campbell so far is
that he’s an old fart with a
stupid name. Sir Ming.
Honestly...
point of Oaten’s campaign seems to be that
he believes the same handful of MPs who
kicked Kennedy out shouldn’t be the ones
who decide the new leader.
Hmm. Well, no one’s really going to be
that excited about it all. Things were going
ok- big increases in the last election (that
could, admittedly, have been better) and a
leader who was despite all his faults among
the chief attractions of the party. Sir Ming
will probably end up in charge, but as Oaten
so cruelly pointed out, he won’t be around
for long. Kennedy’s departure has left the
party in considerable trouble and
Campbell’s likely election will divide the
Liberals further and lead to inevitable instability. Trust the Lib Dems to misstep at
another crucial point.
Cartoons by Michael Church
10
Talking Heads
TNT
Q: Who would be your dream act
(alive or dead) to see play at the
Trinity Ball this year?
Interviews by
Christine Bohan
U2 - I know it’s unrealistic
but to see them play here
would be legend
Katherine McGovern, JS
Geography and Sociology
Republic of Loose would be
deadly. Did they play last
year? Damn I missed them.
It’d be cool to see them
though.
John Dillon, JS Economics
and Business
NWA. It’s a pity they broke
up about 15 years ago
Peter Henry, SS Biblical
and Theological Studies
Classic Beatles played a few
years ago and they were brilliant, they should bring them
back
Andrew Latham, SS
Politics and Sociology
Bell XI. I don’t know if
they’re too big for the Ball
now cos they sold out the
RDS but a couple of them
went to college here so it’d
be cool to have them back
Rachel Merrigan, SF
French and Italian
Take That are playing in the
Point a couple of weeks
before the Ball so maybe
they could hang around
Dublin and play here. So
many memories!
Aoife Sherlock, SS
Sociology
Muse cos there’s no-one
comparable to them and Matt
Bellamy is one of the most
talented musicians ever
Maeve O’Gorman, JF
English and History
again
Marc Faulkner, JF
Theoretical Physics
It’s a bit on the unrealistic
side for a whole lot of reasons but Led Zeppelin
Darragh Gannon, JF
Engineering
Weezer! The last allbum was
a bit ropey but they played
Dublin twice last year and
they were excellent
Christine McDermott, SF
Philosophy and Political
Science
like to see. Going to their gig
in a couple of months anyway so that’ll be cool
Breda Smith, JF Nursing
Kanye West would be legend
Enda Lyons, SF Sociology
and Social Policy
Damien Dempsey. He’s playing Rag Week but he can just
come back again for the
Trinity Ball.
Thomas Nulty, JF
Engineering
Thin Lizzy but not the halfassed reformed version, the
Manic Street Preachers, if
proper one with Phil Lynnott
they played loads of the early Patrick Brunkard, JF
stuff.
Nursing
Penny Harte, JF
Theoretical Physics
Maybe Arctic Monkeys cos
The Kaiser Chiefs, if they’re
they’re on the rise so it’d be
not too big for it.
Bob Dylan
a good time to get them and
Billy Fogarty, SS Electronic Fox Alexander, JF French there’s actually a chance of
Engineering
and History
getting them
Joe McGinchey JF BESS
Aslan. They played the
Bon Jovi put on the best live
Buttery in October and I
show I’ve ever seen so
The Sultans of Ping
think they could rock it up
they’d be the act I’d most
Jen Davis, JS Year History
Bell X1, Weezer, Oasis and Take That: The oddest Ball line up ever
TNT
Fashion
11
Thrift Store Fabulous at your Fingertips
Retro Styles, Asian Silks, 70s glam and 80spunk. All
part of the thrift store experience in the city’s southside. By Carmen Bryce. Photos by Richeal Carroll
and Cian Kennedy
Divert, if just for one afternoon, from
your usual commercial shop hopping
and open your eyes to the plethora of
thrift and vintage stores around Dublin.
A treasure chest of second hand fashion
and vintage funk from every corner of
the globe. Spots such as Wild Child on
Camden Street, The Market Arcade on
George’s Street and The Harlequin on
Castle Market are a must see for affordable and unique treads.
A store that time forgot, The
Harlequin is a haven of styles from
every era, from 40’s sophisticate, 60’s
retro and 80’s sparkle .Opening the
store 12 years ago, mother and daughter
Bollywood cinema.
If you’re looking to embrace
the 70s vixen screaming to get out and
boogie on down then hit the garment
and furniture store Wild Child for disco
and hippy kitch for every occasion.
Based on the premise that the 70s glam
never goes out of fashion, Wildchild is
crammed with gear straight out of
Saturday Night fever. Its funky attitude
puts the fun back into fashion and if the
clothing doesn’t grab you then maybe
the collection of groovy furniture, giggletastic dress-up gear and eye-catching
gadgets will. Pick up accessories such
as slinkies, beanie chairs, stash boxes
and Playboy playing cards, for both the
ladies and the men here.
Its time to turn your back on
Topshop and get set to embrace the
thrift store experience that is sweeping
Base Store is the best for men’s street
wear in the shape of hilarious slogan
T.Shirts, trendy hoodies and the most
popular of stock, the classic army jacket. Boasting visits from Richard
Ashcroft and Cillian Murphy (before
his latest film role perhaps) this store
captures the essence of Brit-pop culture
with credible styles that are rough
around the edges.
Another store with more street
cred and cool than Liam Gallagher himself is the delectable Retro. Manager
The range of vintage gear available at Wildchild on Camden Street.
such as a range of bags jumping off the
rack for €9 and a variety of elegant
Asian dresses for no more than €20.
Similarly, for a taste of the
Orient, visit Om Diva which houses a
range of Asian garments and flowing,
silk gowns for feminine and seductive
fashion. Twenty five year old manager
Siohan Lynch prides herself on the
authenticity of the fabrics, sporting
bags made out of Indian antique wedding gowns and modelled closely on
A treasure chest of second hand fashion and vintage funk from every corner of the globe...
team Susan and Fiona Smyth know
what it takes to make a store of this
nature successful. The tiny shop is literally crammed to the rafters with authentic leather and fur lined coats, hand
crafted dresses, print t-shirts of every
colour and slogan under the sun and
timeless accessorises that will never go
out of fashion. The second-hand gear is
in superb nick and reeks of authenticity
as many of the garments have been
perserved in mint condition since the
1930’s.
Perfect for a lazy, browsing
Saturday with paycheck in your back
pocket is the Market Arcade. It’s easy
to lose yourself for hours amongst the
unique styles of English, American and
Asian designers. The best stalls in my
opinion are Retro, Mahorani, Base
andthe unique designs of Om Diva. The
Ann-Marie Dabiri has filled the store
with designs from London, Germany,
Spain and New York, cramming the
shelves with a fusion of fabric and
styles for both guys and dolls. The store
is over-stocked with Sex Pistols badges,
Blondie wigs, Ramones T.Shirts, 1950s
dotty dresses and punk-tastic accessories. The most eye-catching items are
those from small London-based company ‘Charles,’ that cater only for Retro
and pride themselves on their unique
blend of punk patterns and print.
On the opposite end of the
fashion scale, Mahorani is the place to
visit for elegant Asian styles, ranging
from hand-crafted, patchwork silk bags
from India and Pakistan to Japanese
kimonos and accessories shipped over
from the far East. This is one of the
cheaper stores with jaw-dropping offers
Dress to impress in Asian fabrics and
shriking oriental colours at Om Diva.
the nation. Even millionaire celebrities,
such as Sienna Miller and Kate Moss
have been snapped rummaging through
the racks in search of authentic vintage
gear. When it comes to thrift store
shopping, its worth putting some time
in, making shopping an experience
rather than a chore, even for the men.
Cheap, funky and full of surprises, it’s
simply a student’s prerogative to do it
thrift store style.
Put the right foot forward in The Harlequinon on Castle Market.
12
Books
TNT
This month TNT Books is suffering from a severe case of the winter blues: Anna Ni
Chaoimh hates herself and wants to die, while Paul Earlie’s girlfriend is in a coma...(not
literally!)
Girlfriend in a Coma
Paul Earlie indugles in some wallowing as he
reviews Douglas Coupland’s novel
I’m a big fan of melancholia. It’s one of the finest forms
of self-indulgence, like sarcasm, or shopping in Marks
and Spenser. If melancholia, is then: to become the new
opium of the as-yet-adolescent masses (angst is just so
passé). Where are we to get our fix? ‘Girlfriend in a
Coma’ would probably be a pretty good place to start.
To read ‘Girlfriend’ is to wallow, flounder
even, in everything that makes life (and in particular
youth) blow. The book’s author, none other than the
“Poet Laureate of Generation X” Douglas Coupland,
sums things up quite succinctly: “Your 20s are muck
and shit and pain and loneliness and horror.” Fair
enough. If this kind of relentlessly bleak (and frankly
hostile) outlook on life offends some of your more tender sensibilities, best look away now. ‘Girlfriend’ is not
for the faint of heart.
And yet, as I started reading I decided that this
is a book everyone should before their twenties, or at
least during their twenties. The feeling of oppression
and density which suffuses the first half of Coupland’s
novel is much more than admirable: it’s damn near aweinspiring.
The year is 1979. Richard, a perfectly
mediocre American high school senior, deflowers his
girlfriend on a ski slope, then takes her to a suitably
out-of-control party where she proceeds to mix drinks
and drugs (uh oh) and ultimately hurls herself headlong
into a 17-year coma. As you can see, the plot is relatively unadventurous – three parts boy-meets-girl, one part
It’s a Wonderful Life, a dash of the X-Files, crowned
with a light sprinkling of metaphysics. What makes the
book different is the fact that Karen (the “girlfriend” of
the title) eventually awakens from her extended coma
and promptly delivers some home-truths about her now
middle-aged friends’ modern lifestyles. It’s an interesting take on an old formula, and for a few chapters at
least it manages to sufficiently rouse the reader’s sense
of intrigue.
Karen’s rebirth into
mid-nineties Vancouver provides the novel with a rather
neat division, which unfortunately doesn’t work much in
the book’s favour. The disjointed structure of the book (it
almost seems like two books)
leaves something of an aftertaste in the reader’s mouth,
and not a good one. This is perhaps the novel’s biggest flaw. On
the one hand, we have the unadulterated melancholia of
the first half of the novel as Richard and his fittingly
diverse (some might say implausibly so) group of
friends cope with the aftermath of Karen’s coma, while
simultaneously trying to balance the nightmarish journey through their twenties. This section works, in the
truest sense of the word, as the reader joins in with
Coupland’s ever-degenerating cast as they scream questions about existence to which they are never given
answers: Why is there so much suffering in the world?
Why can’t I find someone? Why am I so lonely?
Now these are universal questions, and they’ll
doubtlessly strike a chord with pretty much anyone who
picks up the novel. However, things begin to take quite
a dramatic downhill turn as soon as Coupland attempts
to provide answers to these questions, mostly through
the medium of Karen’s physical and spiritual reawakening. To do this, Coupland employs a typically clichéd
apocalyptic scenario: Karen’s rebirth heralds the end of
time itself (no, seriously) in the form of a plague that
causes people to nod off into a deathly sleep (or coma,
if you will). The chaos that ensues form this plague is
entertaining enough while it lasts, as civilisation itself
begins to implode, and Mother Nature returns to reclaim
what was so rudely stolen from her in the first place.
Unfortunately, instead of playing around with this
scenario and seeing if he can find a new
perspective on things, Coupland goes and botches
everything by having his preachy prophet Karen and her
(at this point) unbearably whiney friends make fairly
rudimentary statements about the shallowness of
Generation X, their unquestioning devotion to the technological age, and their utter lack of spirituality. This is
a mistake. Fables (and in particular moral fables such as
this) work by dissimulating their message, by being
merely suggestive, not by having their characters pause,
look at the camera, and make sweeping statements
about modern youth culture.
That said, I just can’t dismiss the first half of
the book as easily as I can dismiss the book’s second
half (with its sudden injection of fantasy and its woefully clichéd ending, which one of Coupland’s characters
actually identifies at one point as being a kind of inverted version of It’s a Wonderful Life – groan). I mentioned earlier Nietzsche’s clever little subtitle, and that
deserves an elaboration. This is a book you should read
while young, before middle-age hits, and everything
starts to seem like the End of Days. Just save yourself
the sermon and stop before the half-way mark: there’s
plenty of time for lectures in the real world.
“I Hate Myself and Want to Die”
Anna Ni Chaoimh cheers herself up by reading Tom Reynold’s first book
There are songs that make grateful to be
alive, some that make you cry, and others that simply make you want to get the
razor blades out and run a nice hot bath.
What is it about depressing songs that
makes them so memorable? Is it the gutwrenching lyrics, the story behind them,
the melancholic melodies? Tom
Reynolds, in I Hate Myself, and Want to
Die; The 52 Most Depressing Songs
You’ve Ever Heard, describes depressing
song as one that ruins your day when it
comes on the radio
The introduction concentrates
on the history of depressing songs,
beginning with Homer, and its irreverence is quite witty. Reynolds goes into
great detail on the urban-legend of
‘Gloomy Sunday’, the song whose lyrics
have been found at the scene of over 100
suicides and has been banned in many
countries. The collection is broken down
into 10 categories of doom and gloom,
with labels such as ‘She Hates Me, I
Hate Her’ and ‘I’m Telling A Story
Nobody Wants To Hear’.
Reynolds is moderately witty
and does have a good understanding of
the technical aspect of these songs,
which is interesting if you like that sort
of thing. He draws attention any semiotic
and scientific mistakes, which is very
amusing. For example, Evanescence, he
points out, uses the term ‘resonating
light’ in ‘My Immortal’ but light doesn’t
resonate. Also, in the Counting Crows’
song, ‘Round Here’, ‘no-one notices the
contrast of white on white’, which displays an unfortunate misunderstanding of
the word ‘contrast’.
He can be seriously conserva-
tive and sometimes just very wrong
judgments; He describes Joy Divisions
‘Love Will Tear Us Apart’ as ‘a tad obvious’. However, half of the fun is in disagreeing with his sweeping judgments
and getting fixated on the song he’s
missed, or fuming about the fact that he
has targeted songs you quite like.
At times, he confuses depressing music with just plain BAD music.
The fact that his criteria aren’t properly
set down gets quite frustrating because
surely Celine Dion’s version of ‘All By
Myself’ and Pink Floyd’s ‘Comfortably
Numb’ can’t be considered depressing
for the same reasons?
If subject matter is what makes
a song depressing, where are the obvious
choices like The Smiths, Elliot Smith,
Lou Reed, Nick Cave, Radiohead, and
the band from whom the title was taken,
Nirvana?
Or, if it is
just really
bad pop
music that
fits the bill,
why is he so
concerned with the navel-gazing projects
of accomplished artists. Having said that,
including a CD would have been a nice
touch. As it stands, I look forward to the
release of a CD, so that I can sing along
with a hairbrush in one hand and a razor
in the other. It ends on a strong note,
with a complete countdown of doom,
ranking the songs from numbers 52 to 1.
This is the perfect crescendo to a book
that perfectly suits this time of year;
People feel low, suicide rates are high
and summer feels like an eternity away.
TNT
Theatre
The ISDA’s are acoming soon...
With the biggest event of the year on the horizon, Hilary
Term is looking like a good opportunity to see the cream
of Student Drama, David Lydon reports.
Christmas has been and gone,
we’re well into the New Year
and Hilary Term has
arrived, bringing with it the
promise of the Irish Student
Drama Awards, or the
ISDA’s when they’re at
home. Every Easter, colleges
from across the country
compete in the prestigious
awards, making it the most
important event in the
calendar of any self-respecting student theatre company.
The ISDA’s have proved
very successful for Players
over the years, with last
year’s UCD-hosted awards
earning several successes for
the plays entered. This year,
the awards are
taking place in Cork, and
Players will be looking to
add to the numerous awards
that the society has already
won.
As the awards are
looming on the horizon,
speculation is rife regarding
the playsthat are to be selected. The Players committee
assess every play from the
previous year, before deciding upon the three or four
that have the best chance
of doing Trinity proud. This
term alone there are two
shows a week from week 3
onwards until the end of
term, so there are plenty of
potential candidates.
It’s too early into the
term making any predictions,
but all of the plays that
are being performed are likely to be strong candidates.
From a audience
perspective, take the opportunity to see as many of the
shows as you can, as
this term is already shaping
up nicely. You never know,
when Players return
triumphantly from the ISDA’s
you could claim to be one of
the lucky few too
have seen the show before it
was famous!
13
The English Patient visits Dublin
The Dublin Theatre scene eagerly
anticipates the appearance of one
of the industry’s most versatile
and famous names as Ralph
Fiennes comes to town. Fiennes
has earned fame for playing
diverse and often controversial
roles such as Count Laszlo de
Almásy in the English Patient
(1996) and Amon Goeth in
Schindler’s List (1994), both
earning him Oscar nominations.
Last year was one of his
most successful, with roles in
Wallace and Gromit: The Curse
of the Were-Rabbit, Hary Potter
and The Goblet of Fire and The
Constant Gardener. The latter has
received considerable critical
acclaim, with many critics predicting another nomination at
next month’s Academy Awards.
He will be appearing in Brian
Friel’s play Faith Healer at the
Gate this February alongside
Ingrid Craigie and Ian
McDiarmuid, established stars
themselves, in Jonathan Kent’s
production. Fiennes is no stranger
to the stage, having appeared in,
amongst others, Hamlet on
Broadway, which earnd him a
Tony Award.
The play marks another
collaboration between Friel and
The Gate, who have expressed
their delight at working with
“Ireland’s greatest living playwright” in one of his finest
plays.” The Gate website
describes the show as “the tale of
Frank Hardy, a Faith Healer, who
has spent a life-time touring the
decayed villages of Scotland and
Wales with his manager, Teddy,
and his wife/mistress, Grace.
Now he accepts that he must
return home to Ireland, a destiny
he can no longer postpone. The
story of their touring and of their
fateful return is told in separate,
often contradictory, stories by
Grace and Teddy and Frank himself. These narratives taken
together make up a mosaic that is
both compelling and terrifying.”
Not surprisingly given
the hype surrounding the play,
expectation is high for what
should be a must-see. The Irish
Times have already heralded the
production as being “Absorbing
fiction… brilliant and profound…
an infinitely fine play.” Faith
Healer has the potential to be the
biggest piece of drama Dublin
has seen for a long time, and the
public interest generated by the
stellar cast will ensure tickets will
be difficult to get hold of. There
is already talk of the show transferring to Broadway in April,
with 2005 Tony Award winner
Cherry Jones taking Craigie’s
role. If you go to one show this
term, make it this one.
Faith Healer by Brain Friel
(directed by Jonathan Kent)
begin its run in the Gate
Theatre nightly from the 7th of
February. Previews start on the
2nd February. For more information, visit the Gate’s website,
www.gate~theatre.ie
Ralph Fiennes, in Dublin now
Stuarts, Iguanas and Henry VIII in London
After a strangely quiet summer London’s West End has been awash with hard-hitting
drama this winter, reports our London Theatre Correspondent Mark Wright
The Donmar Warehouse’s inspiring production of Schiller’s Mary Stuart now
coming to the end of its run at the Apollo
is an incredibly powerful examination of
corrupt political machinations. The play
which charts the final days of Mary
Stuart’s life in the run up to her execution by Elizabeth I contains two of the
strongest female roles in theatre with
Janet McTeer and Harriet Walters, playing Mary and Elizabeth respectively,
dominate the roles. Their animosity,
shaded by an almost bitter mutual
respect, makes for powerful viewing,
especially when offset by the strong
ensemble of hideously spineless and reptilian politicians who surround them.
In contrast Tennessee Williams’ Night of
the Iguana at the Lyric falls down
slightly on it’s company, some of whom
occasionally seem to lapse from their
intended Texan accents into a slightly
bizarre and misplaced Devonshire lilt.
However the three central characters; a
defrocked priest turned tour guide
(Woody Harrelson), a horny beach cabin
resort owner (Clare Higgins) and a travelling high-class female con-artist (Jenny
Seagrove) are phenomenal. The play has
its comic moments, and will be familiar
territory to Williams’ fans, dealing with
Woody Harrelson
loneliness, rejection from society and
insanity. For a moment, like the characters themselves, we almost believe
redemption is possible as opposites
appear to attract but it is not to be and
the mournful aching desolation which the
playwright specialised in will stay with
you long after the curtain has fallen.
There is a searing, almost painful, emotional emptiness. It is the silent, soulwrenching cry which no-one will hear, a
vision of humanity lost in tragic isolation.
And finally, Robert Bolt’s play A Man
for All Seasons, which opened last week
at the Theatre Royal, Haymarket. Of the
three, this is the weakest script but by the
end you won’t notice. The play’s subject
is the fall from grace and execution of
Sir Thomas More by King Henry VIII
for refusing to acknowledge the royal
divorce and rejection of the Roman
Papacy. Whilst the script itself never
addresses More’s inner demons over his
decision it redeems itself by sticking
very closely to transcripts and diaries
from the day. Martin Shaw’s representation of the lawyer saint’s canny defence
of his position, and his resolute obedience to the King exerts terrifying depths
of humility and faith. The rawness of his
betrayed and perjured against (yet unbroken) figure is breath-taking and the production which is cleverly staged between
two staircases is an awe-inspiring showcase for the man Benedict Nightingale
last week declared the most gifted actor
on the British stage. Shaw drew a standing ovation the night I saw it and it’s not
hard to see why. If you have to swim to
get there, it’ll be worth it.
Want to write? That’s a
good idea! Promises of
free tickets, artistic credibility and general popularity beckon...
Emails to lydond@tcd.ie.
14
Staying In
TNT
Hate Something, Change
Something: Ads We Hate to Hate
Hannah Scally
“Marge, if we don’t watch the commercials it’s like we’re stealing TV” Homer
explains in one episode of The
Simpsons.
I was reading an article the
other day that was talking about companies using more product placement within shows to counter the increasing problem of what they called ‘ad-avoidance’.
Avoidance is right. Bad ads are
people you’ve met and know, just know
you never want to talk to, ever, ever
again. They turn you into a horrible person. That Meteor lap-dancing ad, in male
or female form, is one that would make
me dive behind a post-box to get out of
the path of. And the Maltesers ad with
the giant women on space-hoppers. The
Tayto ad with the “He loves me, he loves
me not” madwoman meanwhile, I would
be prepared to scramble over small chil-
Bad ads are people you’ve
met and know, just know
you never want to talk to,
ever, ever again...
dren to get away from. Other approaches
are to blank it as if it’s not happening, to
pretend you’ve never met it before, or,
when truly stuck, to shout at it in skincrawling irritation. Sometimes, perversely, you can decide to watch them anyway
as an excercise in resilience - ‘going for
the mental burn’, if you will.
Prime bad-ad candidates, incidentally, include car ads (tedious), mort-
gage/loan/insurance/claim ads (tedious
and depressing), ads for shopping centres
in Northern Ireland (agressive and
depressing), and the absolute worst, ads
for anything in the Midlands.
Advertisers, meanwhile, are
busy thinking up ways to trap you with
them at the bus stop. My response to that
was “well, if they didn’t make the ads so
bloody tedious (see above), I wouldn’t
try and avoid them.” One of the reasons I
love watching rubbishy late-night TV is
because the breaks are about one ad
long.
Then, I remembered my friend
and I singing the Hellman’s Mayonnaise
song out of sheer disbelief to a group of
bemused Scottish people in a pub,
because they have Hellman’s ads over
there, but not the theme song, and the
fact that my sister and I once discovered
we could jingle-sing our way through
two thirds of the contents of our fridge.
And some ads, anyway, are brilliant.
Everyone talks about them and they go
on for ages and then a new one is
brought out using the same gag, and then
another and another until the Duracell
bunny dies. Same old.
What I have noticed cropping
up recently and with more proliferation
are the programmes about ads - The 100
Best Ads Ever, Tarrant on TV, that
annoying Ed Byrne one with the terrible
graphics. Apart from the fact that this is
TV cannabalism on a new level - a having-already-tipped-the-crumbs-out,going-back-and-licking-the-flavouringoff-the-packet sort of thing, (That better
not be the subconscious effect of the
Hate something, change something: The cartoon Honda ad
We feel very sorry for the guy that she’s after
Tayto reference) - they actually often
make quite good telly (feel free to start
that sentence again if you got lost).
Better, surely, than Pat Kenny talking to
some RTE presenter or other about their
new show on RTE which will be on after
this.
Wikipedia (all hail) tells us that
the first ad ever was broadcast in 1941 in
the U.S., for $9 during a baseball match.
It also tells us that the half hour programme today is around 9 minutes shorter that the same programme in the sixties
- and that re-runs of sixties shows are
almost certain to be cut by that 9 minutes
to allow for more ads. Somehow, this
manages to irritate me, even though I
don’t exactly watch a lot of sixties TV,
particularly in the U.S. which is what
they’re talking about.
Love-hate? Maybe. Whatever.
Honda, the people who brought us the
‘Grrr Song’ ad (hate something, change
something, make something betterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!) with the cartoon of
the diesel engine, which I downloaded
because it makes me feel happy - are
bringing out a new ad. This seems to be
a television event. Apparently it’s going
to have a choir ‘singing’ the sounds of a
car driving. By the time this article is
printed, it will already be out and it
might be rubbish. However. A really tiny
part of me is anticipating that ad, and
hoping it’s going to be good. Mustn’t
steal.
Handy Hannah’s Helpful Hint:
www.whatsthatcalled.co.uk has a list
of most of the songs used in British
ads, so if some tune is really bugging
you, or you really like the song that
accompanies the latest Ford car, you
can find out what it is. Table quiztastic.
TNT
Going Out
15
Top 5 things to do in Trinity this week
After the success of the last
one, the Mystery Trip is
back. Tickets went on sale
yesterday (Monday) from
the SU shop and cost €25.
The trip is on Feb 2nd, and
hits 3 venues in 15 hours
Ignore the less-than-complimentary review we gave it
(below) and get along to the
Rappers and Slappers night in
XXI to officially launch Rag
Week tonight. Tickets €5
from the SU shop
Bígí ag caint Gaeilge mar is é
Seachtain na Gaeilge an tseachtain seo! There’s a County
Colours Céilí and Speed Dating
in the Buttery on Wednesday
so dig out your fáinne and
impress with your cúpla focail.
Suas are holding their by-now
annual Bollywood Night in
the Sugar Club this
Thursday. Tickets €7 from
SU Shop and Arts/Hamilton
stands, with loads of spot
prizes on the night
We’re a bit hazy on this one but
we know that Damien Dempsey
is playing the Buttery some
time during Rag Week next
week. Seize the day (hoho!)
and make sure you go along to
see him
The Club Review: XXI D’Olier Street
Claire Keaveny
and
Donal Carey
The holidays managed to fly by so fast
with numerous social engagements, that
club reviews were put firmly to wayside,
until the deadline reminder email came
a-knocking, we knew we were in trouble.
So after many a heated discussion about
where to go at the last minute,
Twentyone was somehow decided on,
just like when we were young and unfortunately ended up in Coyote and to this
day nobody knows how. Especially considering no one ever ever wanted to go
there. Like this article it was a rushed
last minute decision that everybody
regrets.
The night we made it to
Twentyone, it was raining; it always
seems to rain when you go to Twentyone,
anybody else ever noticed this? Maybe
this is because the queues unwelcomingly long, and rain-soaked. They could
realise this and actually let people in a
rate of more than one per minute! When
the long arduous wait is over, you meet
the dullest banterless bouncers. They
seem to have a dislike for when you
don’t have ID with you, but eventually
let you in, purely to fill their minutely
quota.
Then you’re faced with the
‘death-trap stairs’, which for those with
walking -down-stairs difficulties while
sober is not a welcome sight. Combine
this phobia people have with stairs and
throw in the rain and you have literally a
deadly combination. At the bottom of
these death defying stairs, you’re faced
with yet another banterless bouncer, who
enforces an extortionate entry fee onto
you. This fee is constantly high and not
in tune with the rest of student prices.
You are really starting to wonder what
you’ve let yourself into. Then you see
inside...
The layout is badly organised,
which is apparent from the cloakroom
Saturday from 11 o’clock. Oh and bythe-by it’s not a 21 only door policy (the
name is actually their address!)
Scoreboard
“For those who can’t afford a taxi for two, they now have beds...”
queue which is long and blocks the
ladies toilets. This congestion gives science students ample opportunities to
stalk the ‘ladies’. Ladies toilets are
slightly better than average with larger
mirror are - this is a requirement as we
sometimes need time to reapply after the
rain. The Men’s toilets are plentiful but a
bit of squeeze; you get quite close to
your neighbour but this homoerotic tension is eased by the ‘manly’ Ross
O’Carroll Kelly (Southside Legend)
extracts from his weekly Sunday Tribune
column.
The next disappointment that
Club Twentyone offers us is the bars.
There are only two for a venue of 1000
people. In the main circular bar, it’s
elbows and fists in the usual scrum to get
a drink, while in the lesser known side
bar there is civil queuing to get a refreshing beverage or five because that’s how
many you’ll get to avoid coming up
again. This is no fault of the bar staff, but
when busy they could really do with
another bar or two.
Club Twentyones’ dancefloor
should be a breakdancers dancing paradise, but most likely like us you have
never seen this occur. The tyrannical
bouncers put an immediate stop to any
fun activities on the dancefloor. They’re
especially harsh in respect to having
drinks on the dancefloor with a quick
pinch on your arm and a guiding hand
off the dancefloor.
On the upside, the new name
change has seen the knocking down of
the dancefloor divide wall that was just
pointless. Other “improvements” include
the new podiums that allow the ever so
prominent B€$$ girl to flaunt her stuff,
but then again how often is anyone ever
seen in XX1?
We’ve all had a visit or two to
the intimate corners back in the day and
now they have made life easier on all
those who cant afford a taxi for two back
to theirs - they now have beds. These
beds make the alcoves that bit seedier,
and stains have been seen on the tasteful
coverings (unlike the acts that occur on
them).
They are trying to make it more
appealing to us students with a designated student night with drinks allegedly
€3, although we’ve all been seduced by
similar unfounded promises by these
guys before. And now for the part you
won’t read….it’s open Monday to
Entry
0/5 – Always expensive, always
queues, always raining. We just
don’t like queuing there.
Bouncers
0/5 – Overly pushy and not up
for the banter
Bar Service
2.5/5 – Need more staff and bars
Crowd
2/5 – No one ever really goes
there, we wonder why?
Scoring ability
3.5/5 – Possible only if its
Fresher’s Week and ya wanna get
your ‘wink wink’
Music
2/5 – General pop and they never
do requests for the ladies
Toilets
4/5 - We like their toilets
Bar Prices
3/5 - Sometimes cheap imitation
drinks, heading in the right direction though with student night.
Smoking Area
1/5 - Pretty appalling but at least
you can lick hand stamps so others can at least get in free
Beds
4/5 - Where else has nice beds in
a nightclub? Stains bring it down
a mark though.
OVERALL SCORE = 22/50
A bad place now slightly better
but why do societies insist on
having nights out here?
16
Bits and Pieces
TNT
What’s burning up the TNT Office this issue...
. Kanye West featuring Adam Levine - Heard ‘Em Say
It is a measure of how fantastically cool Kanye is that he can take that gimp of a
lead singer from Maroon 5, stick him on a record and make it sound this good.
Arctic Monkeys - When the Sun Goes Down
Didn’t really get the appeal of ‘Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor’ but this
Streets-soundalike is way better. Funny too.
All Time Love - Will Young
Will Young was recently voted Sexiest Male Celebrity by Heat magazine. We can think of no better
endorsement.
Separated at Birth
Provost of Trinity College
Professor John Hegarty
Fast food mogul Colonel
Sanders from KFC
One is an iconic white-bearded marketing phenomenon,
famed worldwide for taking a second rate chicken joint and
cutting costs unrelentently until he had single-handedly transformed it into a world beating corporate empire, capable of
churning out thousands of chickens every year, with outlets as
far away as India. And the other is... Colonel Sanders!
(Baddum-tcch! Thanks folks, we’re here all year). Yes it’s
Professor John Hegarty, Provost and Colonel Harland
Sanders, Legend. Both ruthless businessmen, hell bent on
ensuring their legacy to their organisation with little regard
for those who dare to cross their path on their road to glory,
whether it’s millions of chickens coated in the special sauce
or most of the Trinity Economics department. Both men are
also proud purveyors of the oddest beards we’ve seen since
well, puberty. Gentlemen, we salute you.
Psst...
Although candidates haven’t
even been officially
announced yet, one of the
runners in the Presidential
race has been talking about
how he’s just in it for his CV
and figures he’s going to get
a decent job out of it. (And
yes, we know this could
apply to other candidates, but
it’s rare to hear someone
being so open about it).
Unfortunately, those in the
know don’t rate his chances
at all - looks like he may be
looking for that job sooner
than he thinks...
Hot hot heat
‘Anchorman’ quiz in the
Buttery last week
Whammy! The cult following
of the legend that is Ron
Burgundy saw a packed
Buttery for this quiz. More
please
It’s time for...
Utterly Useless
Facts of the Week!
The cafe in Habitat
1. Tom Dillon,the Deputy Pres
of the SU has given blood (his
own, we presume) so many
times that the next time he
does, they’re actually going to
give him a gold pin for doing
it. Makes us all feel a bit
guilty here.
Facebook vs Bebo
2. There’s a holy well under
the Nassau Street entrance to
college called St. Patrick’s Well
3. The human brain continues
sending out electrical wave signals for up to 37 hours after
death
4. All mammals have tongues
For a tenner you can get some
seriously excellent food. We recommend the chicken caesar thing
Which is better? Rate your own
popularity (or lack of)
Damien Dempsey playing
the Buttery
Damo always puts on excellent
live shows. Go early to get a seat
New series of Desperate
Housewives
Now that the novelty’s worn off
it’s become sadly clear how
ungood it is
Business students
Dull capitalists who speak in that
ridiculously off-putting management speak. And we’re not just
jealous cos they’re going to make
more money than us.
5. Alfred Hitchcock didn’t have
a belly button
Rugby losses
6. A guidedog can’t tell a green
light from a red one. It watches
the traffic to know when it is
safe to lead it’s master across.
The rugby first XV’s performance in the All-Ireland league this
season. Sorry boys, we know
you’re trying but come on, one
win?!
No heating in House 6
Clarification:
In the last edition of TNT, there
was a reference to Fair City in
the article ‘Beauty is in the eye
of the beholder’ on the Fashion
page. This comment was added
in at the editorial stage and was
not that of the article’s author.
Apologies for any offence this
may have caused
Seriously, we’re freezing our
asses off here.
Ice ice baby