AIN`T IT THE TRUTH? - Rights Reserved © 2016
Transcription
AIN`T IT THE TRUTH? - Rights Reserved © 2016
3 All Rights Reserved © 2014 2012 AIN’T IT THE TRUTH? A man was walking on the beach one day and he found a bottle half buried in the sand. He decided to open it. Inside was a genie. The genie said, "I will grant you three wishes and three wishes only." The man thought about his first wish and decided, "I think I want 1 million dollars transferred to a Swiss bank account.” The man thought about his second wish and said, “Next I want a red Ferrari.” POOF! There was the car sitting in front of him. Finally he asked for his final wish, "I wish I was irresistible to women." “No problem,” said the genie and POOF! He turned him into a box of chocolates. PLANE AND SIMPLE A popular airline recently introduced a special half rate fare for wives who accompanied their husbands on business trips. Expecting great feedback, the company sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, "What trip?" PUBLISHED AND DISTRIBUTED WEEKLY BY PASSTIMES OF ARIZONA, LLC - PASSTIMESAZ@LIVE.COM - 480.983.9143 ALL I WANT IS A LOG CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWEHERE WITH REALLY FAST INTERNET SERVICE PEOPLE WHO SHINE FROM WITHIN USUALLY DON’T NEED A SPOTLIGHT TO BE IN WHILE WE WERE STILL SINNERS, CHRIST DIED FOR US. — ROMANS 5:8 ‘PSITHURISM’ - THE SOUND OF THE WIND THROUGH THE TREES I ALWAYS WONDER WHY BIRDS STAY IN THE SAME PLACE WHEN THEY CAN FLY ANYWHERE. THEN I ASK MYSELF THE SAME QUESTION YOU CAN TELL HOW SMART SOMEONE IS BY WHAT THEY LAUGH AT LIFE IS A TCKET TO THE GREATEST SHOW ON EARTH ¥ It was physicist Albert Einstein who made the following sage observation: ‘Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from that of their social environment.’ ¥ Unlike humans, birds see everything in focus all the time. ¥ You might be surprised to learn that the bagpipe did not originate in Scotland. This ancient instrument existed in Asia in the pre-Christian era. Those who study such things say that the Emperor Nero was a bagpiper, even performing publicly at Roman athletic events. ¥ Sharks have existed for 50 million years longer than trees. I WOULD RATHER DIE OF PASSION THAN OF BOREDOM ¥ From ancient times in China up until the 19th century, the upper classes considered very long fingernails to be beautiful and a mark of distinction, indicating that one with such long nails never had to perform manual labor. Cracking was a problem with these long nails, though, as they sometimes were grown in excess of 2 inches long. To combat the problem, the ruling classes would wear special gold and silver covers on their nails. ¥ Even cows have best friends, and they will spend most of their time together. ¥ Your heart circulates a million gallons of blood a year. ¥ You almost certainly have a Social Security number, but did you ever wonder what the numbers mean? The first three numbers indicate what part of the country you were in when you applied (or when your parents applied for you), the next two numbers are a code indicating the year of your application, and the last four numbers are considered to be your citizen’s number. Thought for the Day: ‘and the public know. / What all schoolchildren learn. / Those to whom evil is done. / Do evil in return.’ -- W.H. Auden (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc. WE MET FOR A REASON; YOU’RE EITHER BLESSING OR A LESSON FOR WHOEVER WANTS TO SAVE HIS LIFE WILL LOSE IT, BUT WHOEVER LOSES HIS LIFE FOR ME WILL SAVE IT. —LUKE 9:24 BOOKS ARE PROOF THAT HUMANS CAN WORK MAGIC NO, I’M NOT ADDICTED TO COFFEE...ALTHOUGH WE ARE IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP IF YOU DO NOT ASK THE ANSWER WILL ALWAYS BE NO WHEN YOU STUMBLE MAKE IT PART OF THE DANCE CHRIST DIED FOR THE UNGODLY - ROMANS 5:6 TIPS & TRICKS FROM BITS N' BYTES COMPUTERS Facebook’s main business is selling ads based on its user base. I mean me and you! A lot of privacy violations occur because people don’t protect themselves. These are great tips for you – and for your family. Kids should understand the importance of these privacy protections early. And if there are less tech-savvy folks around, go over these tips with them, too. Facebook Search - Yes, Facebook keeps a record of your entire site search history. On your Facebook home page, click the down arrow in the upper right-hand corner, and select Activity Log. In the left-hand column where it lists Photos, Likes and Comments, click the More button below those. Then at the bottom of the list click Search. Once you’ve clicked on that, you’ll be able to see everything – and everyone – you’ve search for on the site. Up at the top of the page, click on Clear Searches, and then again in the dialog box to confirm. The search area should now be empty. You can’t turn this feature off, so you’ll have to do this regularly. Advertising - If you let it, Facebook will use your picture to endorse or sell products. Believe it or not, Facebook’s terms of service allow your image to be automatically used if you’ve said you “liked” a particular product, or “checked in” at a particular store or restaurant. To stop this, let’s go back to the Activity Log page and, again on the left-hand side, click on the Likes link. You’ll see all your likes listed. Privacy Settings - Third, we need to dive into privacy settings. We all have to take responsibility for our online privacy. So go to the padlock icon in the upper right corner of your profile and under “Who can see my stuff?” set “Who can see my future posts?” to Friends. So you might think about weeding out your friends list. For Parents - Here’s a tip for parents. Facebook originally didn’t let the Facebook pages for kids be viewable by the general public – just their friends. That’s changed. If your kids are minors, it’s a good idea to go in and adjust their privacy settings to make sure they are set to “Friends.” You should also go to the down arrow in the upper corner, select Settings and in the left-hand column choose Privacy. Then click the Limit Past Posts link and set that to Friends as well. Plan Ahead - And finally, this is a tiny bit sobering, but if Facebook and your Facebook profile is a big part of your life, you should start thinking about what you want to happen if you were to pass away. Facebook rules decree that the status of your page will remain the way you had it in life; it will be “memorialized,” as the company puts it, when they are presented with evidence of your passing. Stay Safe My Friends THE LESS I NEED THE BETTER I FEEL WHEN YOU FORGIVE YOU DON’T ALTER THE PAST, YOU CHANGE THE FUTURE ‘TARANTISM’ - THE UNCONTROLLABLE URGE TO DANCE AND BE HAPPY ¥ On April 30, 1888, a hailstorm devastates the farming town of Moradabad, India, killing 230 people and thousands of farm animals. Most of the victims died instantly when hail the size of oranges rained down from the sky, striking them. ¥ On April 28, 1897, the Chickasaw and Choctaw, two of the Five Civilized Tribes, become the first to agree to abolish tribal government and communal ownership of land. By 1902, the other three tribes -- the Cherokees, Seminoles and Creeks -- followed suit, finally throwing open all of Indian Territory to white settlement. ¥ On May 4, 1916, Germany responds to a demand by U.S. President Woodrow Wilson by agreeing to limit its submarine warfare. However, on Feb. 1, 1917, Germany announced the resumption of unrestricted submarine warfare, and the United States formally entered World War I. YOUR NAKED BODY SHOULD ONLY BELONG TO THOSE THAT HAVE ALREADY FALLEN IN LOVE WITH YOUR NAKED SOUL. ¥ On May 2, 1933, although accounts of an aquatic beast living in Scotland's Loch Ness date back 1,500 years, the modern legend of the Loch Ness Monster is born when a sighting makes local news. The Inverness Courier newspaper related an account of a local couple who claimed to have seen "an enormous animal rolling and plunging on the surface." ¥ On April 29, 1968, "Hair," the now-famous "tribal love-rock musical" that introduced the era-defining song "Aquarius," premieres on Broadway. "Hair" quickly became not just a smash-hit show, but a genuine cultural phenomenon. ¥ On May 3, 1980, 13-year-old Cari Lightner of Fair Oaks, Calif., is killed by a drunk driver while walking along a quiet road when the car swerves out of control and strikes her. Cari's tragic death compelled her mother, Candy Lightner, to found the organization Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD). ¥ On May 1, 1941, months before its release, Orson Welles' landmark film "Citizen Kane" begins generating such controversy that Radio City Music Hall refuses to show it. "Citizen Kane," now revered as one of the greatest movies in history, made its debut at the smaller RKO Palace Theater and was a failure at the box office. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc. COMFORT ZONES ARE GREAT; BUT NOTHING EVER GROWS THERE THE SMALLEST DEED IS GREATER THE LARGEST INTENTION BY HIS WOUNDS YOU HAVE BEEN HEALED. — 1 PETER 2:24 Answers 1. Magma 2. Four on each foot 3. 3.1 miles 4. Between southern Italy and Greece 5. 38 6. The twins 7. Saul Bellow 8. 2002 9. "Christmas Vacation" 10. Black Sabbath (c) 2013 King Features Synd., Inc. NO ONE GETS SICK ON WEDNESDAYS 1. SCIENCE: What is another word for molten rock below the Earth's surface? 2. ANIMAL KINGDOM: How many toes does a hippopotamus have? 3. MEASUREMENTS: How many miles are run in a 5K (kilometer) footrace? 4. GEOGRAPHY: Where is the Ionian Sea? 5. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: How many colleges are housed at Oxford University? 6. ASTROLOGY: What is the symbol of the Gemini sign? 7. LITERATURE: Who wrote the novel "Humboldt's Gift"? 8. MUSIC: In what year did singer Kelly Clarkson win the "American Idol" competition? 9. MOVIES: What Chevy Chase movie featured the tagline "yule crack up"? 10. ENTERTAINERS: What band is Ozzie Osbourne associated with? IF ANYONE WOULD COME AFTER ME, HE MUST DENY HIMSELF AND TAKE UP HIS CROSS DAILY AND FOLLOW ME -LUKE 9:23 HE HIMSELF BORE OUR SINS IN HIS BODY ON THE TREE, SO THAT WE MIGHT DIE TO SINS AND LIVE FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS— 1 PETER 2:24 UNICORNS ARE REAL; THEY’RE JUST SHORT, FAT AND GREY...WE CALL THEM RHINOS A GROUPING OF SHARKS IS CALLED A SHIVER